Kings Norton To Buy or Not to Buy

Some serious homework is required for today's To Buy Or Not To Buy.

That explains the foreboding smell of revision that is hanging heavy in the air.

We need to do that before we meet today's house hunters.

We are donning our school uniforms. Well, school ties, at least.

We've been through all the property textbooks.

We've even got property literature in hand, ready for the show.

So let the episode or, for today and today only, class, commence.

Good morning, viewers. Today you find us in the West Midlands, Kings Norton to be precise.

We found this beautiful old former grammar school, so we thought,

"What better place for us to come and study in?"

But why, I hear you ask, are two property gurus, such as Jonnie

and myself, dressed up like schoolchildren

and clutching revision?

Why do you think we're wearing the ties?

You at the back, any answers? Any answers?

Yes, correct, today's buyers are, in fact, teachers. You're right. Well done.

So, as you'd expect,

Ed and myself are both feeling quite a bit of pressure

to make sure the properties we show them today make the grade.

And the two teachers in question are Stephanie Davis and her soon-to-be husband, Simon Laking.

Both teach at GCSE level, so between them they're not short on the old grey matter.

But what they are short on is time.

If they're not busy teaching, they're busy marking, and if they're not marking,

they're planning their wedding, which leaves them little time to look for their new marital home.

That's where we come in.

Bearing in mind you are both teachers, I thought I'd start by giving you a nice apple,

-curry a bit of favour!

-That's embarrassing, isn't it, I've got...

-Ah.

-There we go.

-At least you can eat mine.

There's a very traditional theme behind you guys, a nice bit

of background. Tell me about that, Simon?

We're not married yet. We're getting married early next year.

So we're not living together.

And hoping to buy our first kind of marital home.

-Wow, this is amazing, this. Who came up with the concept for this?

-Um...

-Marriage has been around for...

-Not marriage!

The idea of doing it the proper way. Whose idea was it?

It's just that's what we want to do.

What a brilliant idea. Hats off to you.

You sound like you are born and bred Birmingham. Do you work here?

No, I don't actually, I work in Sandwell at a school over there.

I'm a Dudley girl and I work in Dudley. I don't really want to move. I want to move

over to Birmingham way, but not far from Dudley because my family's there.

-So we're thinking Birmingham.

-We're thinking Birmingham, south or southwest.

Cotteridge, Bournville, Kings Norton.

-I think, ideally, we'd like a three-bed semi.

-There's only two of you at the moment.

Does that mean we might be planning?

I think I might need to stand behind him in case he faints.

-Maybe.

-Yeah, we'll get there one day.

-One day.

Do you have any desire for your layout downstairs?

I'm quite fussy, I would prefer a separate dining room.

You are traditionalists, aren't you?

This part of the world, there is a lot of housing stock.

If you're looking at semi-detached properties, you're probably

looking at post-war semis. Do you like the look of those?

Absolutely. Being a history teacher, I quite like period features,

so something not maybe brand new would be something I would particularly like.

There's some lovely old terraced housing in Birmingham.

-Would you push yourself to a terrace?

-If it was an end terrace,

so there's space on the side rather than being boxed in.

How much money have you got to spend?

-We have around about £140,000.

-OK, because you are sitting pretty, you have nothing to sell,

-you are ready to go, could I nudge you a bit or could we have a haggle zone, could we go to 145, 150?

-Yes.

-I would say probably below 145.

-I think we know what we're looking for then.

-OK, wish us luck.

-Wish you luck, best of luck.

-Good luck.

-You're not going to eat that, are you?

-No, no.

Here we are, have a look at that, viewers.

Jonnie shall we have a look at your apple again?

-It's pathetic.

-I see these as a vision into the future

of maybe what the houses are going to be like today.

Mine is going to be brilliant, perfect and massive and yours is going to be...

If you are going to stick with that metaphor, yours might be big

but bear in mind yours is a cooking apple, completely un-useable and, therefore, unsuitable.

INAUDIBLE

It's not that bad.

-Kings Norton is situated in the southwest of Birmingham.

-At its heart

is this pretty green, which is a designated conservation area,

surrounded by an array of independent shops.

Along with this 13th-century church are the old school and the Saracen's Head,

helping it retain some of its early-village character.

One mile down the road is the world's most famous chocolate factory in Bournville,

making Kings Norton a popular place to live for chocoholics and factory workers.

Enough of Kings Norton for now.

Myself and Jonnie have swatting up to do if we're going to find three properties which will get top marks.

Whilst we do that, take a look at these converted schools which are available to buy across the UK.

The first converted school is this two-bed stunner in Bradford.

Buckets of space, all over three floors.

Our second school is this two-bed maisonette in Weston-super-Mare,

complete with a great kitchen and bathroom.

And finally, we have this former Victorian school

in Hilton, Derbyshire, finished to the most exacting standards,

it could be yours for...

MUSIC: "Theme from Grange Hill"

Very good, Hall, very good. Now let's talk properties.

As you know, choosing the right school is just as important as choosing the right home.

Is a school in a good catchment area is worth more or less than the average home?

More, sir, more, sir.

-By how much?

-70% more expensive.

Very good, Mr Hall.

Very good, indeed. Now geography.

Where in the country have we got good schooling, what areas?

Sir, could you have a look over there at the picture I drew earlier on.

-Altrincham in Cheshire.

-Very good.

-Hallam near Sheffield and Solihull.

-Very good. One more.

-Sorry, no, I don't know.

-Sutton Coldfield, Hall!

-Sorry, I panicked.

-What do we call these areas, Hall?

I've got two answers for that.

I'm going to go with educational super-suburbs, sir.

Very good, Hall, very good indeed. Properties in recession, you've been reading up on that, have you?

It's a specialist subject of mine, sir.

Would you say properties close to good schools have suffered more or less in this economic downturn?

Less, I would say less, sir. To the tune of 16% above the average, for the area, I would say.

Most impressive. I would say that was nine out of ten and you really are peerless, aren't you?

-Top of the class!

-I'm just going to get on with my bit of pink.

Now today's show could have been very different, couldn't it?

These are the properties we could have had a look around

if they hadn't sold in just a couple of days.

It's good news for the property market but it's bad news for Steph and Simon.

This sold. That sold, that sold and that sold,

but these ones didn't sell and they are still lovely and I think they tick all of their boxes.

Now this is the period property they asked for.

It has the bedrooms and it's around 40 minutes from where Steph works.

So boxes being ticked, it's eight out of ten at least.

It is very nice. Now my one...

I've gone character.

It's full of character. It's characterful, if you will.

It is very nice and old and has all the stuff Steph likes.

She is a history teacher. I think it's the best location.

Now, the wild card, the wild card, everyone loves a wild card.

Will they love the modern wild card, if they like history?

Modern is still a period. This is 20 years old.

The thing about this modern house, it gives them everything they have asked for.

It is still traditional, it's got separate dining areas,

-but it's got a garage.

-BELL RINGS

-The school bell is ringing, where shall we start?

-Property number one.

-Jonnie's one.

As tradition is so important to Steph and Simon, I factored that

into my choice with a traditional semi, located in Kings Norton.

Here we are at property number one, my choice. Stephanie, I'm focusing on you. You're the one

making all the compromises, you're the one doing all the travelling.

At the moment, as we stand, we're around 35 minutes away from the school that you currently teach at.

OK, 35 minutes is about right.

I've not even thought about your school.

I've not given it any consideration. The house we're looking at here, it looks post-war semi.

Quite typical of the area. It's surrounded by period houses. Do you like this style?

Yeah, definitely. I like some of the old features in the house.

You've got a bit of lead in the windows and stained glass on your front door there.

I am going to use a term, because I've done a lot of research today, because obviously you're teachers,

-hence the tie.

-He's upped his game.

It's an honest house, I would describe it.

The things within it that, kind of, you know, might need having work doing,

are not hidden, it is a very honest house.

Keep an open mind and maybe with this new open mind of yours,

try and see it how it might be after a year's worth of ownership.

-Oh, right, OK.

-Are you excited?

-Yes.

-Into the property to bewitch you away from Dudley.

A nice phrase, isn't it, "honest house".

Honestly, I think you're talking nonsense.

Well, as honest as this house is, my friend, let's find out who is teacher's pet.

-Let's have a look in here then.

-These floors are nice, aren't they?

-This is different.

-This is nice.

Very characteristic, isn't it?

I feel like I'm in a very old pub.

-Do you?

-Yeah.

-I like this brickwork and it's really light, isn't it, with the big bay window?

The bay, in my opinion, is probably the most honest part of the house.

-It's quite compact.

-Yeah, I suppose they've just got a settee in here, haven't they?

-They have.

Would another one fit there?

Well, I don't know, it's quite small.

Now I know they don't live together, but surely Steph has visited Simon in his flat and in comparison,

this is going to be a behemoth of a building, compared to the flat.

-What do you think, because you wanted a bigger kitchen, didn't you?

-It's liveable, isn't it?

-Definitely.

-It's not like you would have to rip it out. It's very retro.

We're showing them a post-war semi and in a lot of ways, in a very nice way,

they could have a post-war existence.

They're living apart, they're going to move in together once they get married.

-Oh!

-OK.

A few bedrooms. The bathroom.

-Straightaway.

-It's quite small, isn't it, the bathroom?

-It is small.

-Quite a distinctive bathroom colour, isn't it?

-Yeah.

-It's an honest bathroom.

-And honestly, it needs refitting.

-It's a very honest bathroom.

It's liveable. It's not really bad that you couldn't live in it straightaway.

Again, it could be a long-term project, couldn't it?

Size-wise?

-Erm...

-It's not the biggest bedroom in the world?

But that furniture is quite big, isn't it?

They're saying there's a lot of furniture in these bedrooms. There isn't that much.

Also, Steph hasn't bought a house yet, so she's got NO furniture.

OK, so this is the third room, isn't it?

-The third and final.

-I don't know if you could make it into a bedroom.

-No, but it could be like a study.

-I thought you were going to say "nursery" then, I was thinking,

-"You're brave!"

-Well, maybe in the future.

Well, there we go. Just a little bit of positive suggestion from Jonnie

at the start of the day about the children and it's happening.

Just a slight suggestion. She's showing intent here. Good old Steph.

Shall we find the guys?

-Our pupils.

-And tell them what we think?

Yes, we'll do that. After you.

Now going with the whole teacher thing, no-one likes a teacher's pet or blowing your own trumpet but,

so far, I'm pretty much top of the class.

They haven't even seen my project yet. I've got them a lovely little thing.

How did I do? Is this potentially a new family home for you?

I think there are some issues that the house has come up with.

-Yeah.

-I think our biggest concern is...

-Upstairs, isn't it?

-..upstairs.

It seems a little compact.

There are a few things that need changing and repairing.

The repairing, to quote the very-well-respected property guru, Ed Hall,

"This is an honest house."

It's honest in as much as it hasn't had any TLC, you can see it.

Now that's good because they've not masked anything, so you can see where the jobs are.

You look at the stains above this bay, all the windows at the back are shot.

But you can see it as soon as you walk in, so you know what you're getting.

But this is your first house and it depends how much

-this work is going to cost, doesn't it?

-Yes.

-Oh, the guru's here!

-Have you been explaining the things I told you about?

-Yes, sir. I hope I did well.

-Who would like to go first in the "guess the price" arena?

-I'll go first on this one.

I'm going to go for 137.

You think with maybe all the honesty that needs... 137? Okey-dokey. Steph?

I'm going to go higher.

I think it's 139 maybe...

and a half.

Right, OK.

-Well, this house is on the market for £124,000.

-Oh, OK!

Honestly, to make this house a really nice house

for you guys, you are probably spending up to 140 grand on it, OK?

-So, with that in mind...

-It kind of works.

Well, I would like to bring in, no expense spared, the To Buy Or Not To Buy school-themed grading cards.

Now if you could, just amongst yourselves,

maybe do a joint grading of how well Jonnie's done.

-How is it looking?

-I don't know, they've gone past the A.

-Is that fair?

-Yeah.

-Have you made your decision?

-We have.

So, if you'd like to deliver it to Jonnie? Are you ready? Good luck.

-C.

-Satisfactory.

-That's every school report I've ever had.

-Things haven't got better in my professional life.

-I will have the grading cards back.

Shall we go to property number two, which hopefully will be somewhere nearer the A region?

That's what it looks like, but you didn't get that. Shall we go?

If Steph and Simon ever dreamed of living by a chocolate factory, they don't have to dream any more.

My property is in Bournville, the home of chocolate.

Here we are, end terrace - you asked for that.

It's a bit older than Jonnie's property. I'm going to go for you, Simon.

What do you think about this?

-Interesting.

-Ooh! Really?

-Come on, Steph, can you give us any more than interesting?

I'm not too sure at the moment.

-I don't think the inside will disappoint you. It is deceptively spacious.

-OK.

-I'll give you that.

-Is viewing recommended?

-It is highly recommended, especially internal viewing.

-OK, are you ready?

-I'm ready.

Are you pumped and excited?

-I am ready to go.

-OK. All right.

Well, this is the house you'll have those children in.

-Go!

-OK.

I'm having children. I'm having children over the expression "interesting".

-I'm worried about what that means.

-It is interesting. It's spacious.

Right, Jonnie, here's a test for you.

School theme. Two words to describe this back garden.

First word begins with D, the second word begins with S.

Disappointing and shady.

Deceptively spacious.

Ah! It's actually a lot bigger than I thought, to be quite honest.

That is deceptive from the front.

I thought when we looked at it from the front, it was really small.

That equals they are fooled by its spaciousness.

That is a good size.

Yeah, I like the size of this living room. You've got an L shape.

-Yeah.

-So that's big, isn't it? You could have quite a few people round.

-Mm.

They've got their friends coming round.

-If they lived in Bournville, they would in trouble, because there are no pubs.

-Correct.

Lots of chocolate but no pubs.

Right, OK, this is nice.

-There's definitely a lot more cupboard space and things in this one.

-It looks bigger.

-Yeah, it does.

-It looks more inviting.

They are like teachers.

They are marking each room as they go.

Yeah, well done, I'm pleased.

I'm pleased with you so far, room. I like what you done there, well done, A*.

And we've got a downstairs loo.

-Oh, right.

-Interesting.

-Oh, that's all right, isn't it?

It's more than a downstairs loo.

Oh, it's got a shower and everything. This might be the bathroom, though.

We'll have to see upstairs if there is a bathroom.

OK, the beauty for me is they don't know how the property's laid out.

They think there's an upstairs bathroom.

But there isn't one.

So, let's have a look how upstairs figures out compared to downstairs.

Ooh! Out of breath.

She's puffing and panting up those stairs.

She's not very old.

She needs to move here, this is like a gym, this stairway.

-Get those quadriceps pumping.

-Ooh, yes.

This is quite a big room, to be honest.

-It's a good size, isn't it?

-It is. Looks good.

It's better than I thought it would be. I didn't think it would be as large, this room.

Again, the size of space. "It is big, isn't it?"

Of course it is, it's deceptively spacious this house!

OK, so I'm thinking that the main bathroom's downstairs, isn't it? Because there isn't one up here.

However, some people do convert and lose one of their bedrooms upstairs.

It depends how important it is...

..to be upstairs. It is nice upstairs, isn't it?

-Do you get a food feeling about the house?

-Yeah, I do.

-Yeah.

I don't get feelings about houses but, yeah, it's nice.

-You could see yourself living here.

-I could.

-OK.

Steph and Simon, did you not believe me outside?

Clearly, you didn't believe me when I said the words "deceptively spacious".

-And you were telling the truth.

-It's big, isn't it?

-You were being honest.

-Thank you. I'm always honest!

Do you want to play guess the price?

-Go on, then.

-I think it's on the market for about 144.

Oh, so you're very impressed with this house, then?

-Yeah.

-You think it's better than the first property?

-Yeah.

I'm going to say 141,500.

That's a little bit mean. He's just shaving off you there.

Do you want to know who's won?

-Go on, then.

-You. You have won again, because the actual price of this property is 139,950.

Because you're in a good position, you could haggle,

you could whittle away so you could be getting it for even less.

-Shall we get on to this?

-You're so keen!

You know when you've done your homework and you got it in on time,

you can't wait for your mark.

That's what Ed's doing at the moment. Here's the cards. Ooh, look, there's a U.

That probably stands for "upstairs bathroom".

-My property had, but, you know, it's up to you.

-See what you think.

-It's not an A.

-I'll look away.

-I think we can get rid of that one.

-Yeah. Honestly, I'd go for that one.

-Would you?

-What?!

-Shall we give a slash? Got it.

Ooh!

-I was going to go for A, because I thought it was more money than it was.

-Thank you.

Well, I'll take that. I'm going to frame that and keep that forever.

There is the wildcard and we've still got this left to achieve.

Do you think we can do it with the wildcard?

It's possible. It's possible. On to the A-plus property.

There's no tradition and there's no chocolate factory.

But everyone loves the wildcard.

-Don't they?

-Simon and Stephanie, the carousel that is the wildcard

has stopped spinning, and it's stopped spinning right here in Bartley Green. Do we know it?

-I know it. I used to go to school round the corner.

-Ooh!

What about yourself, Steph?

I haven't been here before, so it's new to me.

Well, we've got some good news for you, because where we are at the moment is just 20 minutes

-from your school where you work.

-That's good.

OK. Now, looking at the property there, it is the wildcard,

and one of the main reasons it's the wildcard is it's kind of modern.

-Yes.

-And you like kind of olde-worlde stuff.

-I like modern.

-Do you?

-I like modern.

-Your favourite period, is probably late '80s, early '90s, yeah?

-I would say so, yeah.

Are you excited?

-Yes, definitely.

-Well, be on your best behaviour.

Remember, it hasn't got the period features.

So, go! Go! I'm going to go!

I'm going to go, as well.

-Have they started yet?

-I think so.

They're so excited!

Straight into the living room.

-It's liveable straightaway, isn't it?

-Yeah.

Not our style, but you can do what you want.

-What do you think about the size of the room?

-It's not a bad size.

Two settees they've got in here.

-You could probably fit another chair in.

-I don't feel squashed.

-No.

I think the size of this room is bigger than the size of the rooms we've shown them up until now.

It's a separate dining room, which is good, because that's what I wanted.

This is basically a massive tick list, this house.

It is modern yet old. It's modern with tradition.

OK, so this is the kitchen.

-It's a good size, really, and it's got loads of storage, loads of cupboards.

-Mm.

I'm surprised, because I thought Simon would be leading this,

because he seemed the most enthusiastic.

-But actually, old Steph.

-Well, at the end of the day, Steph sounds like she's the decision-maker.

-She is.

Right then, up the stairs we go.

See what this room holds for us.

A single bed, I wonder if there is a room bigger than this.

Yeah, I can't imagine this is the biggest room.

Erm, again, it would just need decorating, wouldn't it, really, to go more with our tastes?

-Yeah, sure. I'm interested to see if this is the main bedroom.

-Oh, I don't think it is.

I think there'll be another one.

Now, I'm concerned.

Steph was our main worry.

-She now loves it. Simon should love it, but he thinks it's smaller.

-The pendulum has swung, Ed.

It is compact.

Yeah, and it would need a new suite eventually.

-Not room for more than one, though, is there?

-Why would you want to share a bathroom with me?

That's true, yeah.

-Hello!

-I think that's... What?

-That's romance there.

-They've not lived together, because they're obviously not married yet,

and they don't know what happens in married life,

but, you do do a lot of sharing when you live together.

That's true. That's very true.

-The final room. Is it bigger?

-Oh, yeah, it is.

And again you've got the built-in storage, which is good.

And you've got... Oh, there you go, a nice little dresser for you. Yeah.

-It's a really good room, I think.

-It's a great-sized room, and that, I think,

because they viewed it last,

hopefully in the period of time they've got

between then and when they see us will have influenced their whole...

Put a better spin on it, you think.

-You were supposed to like this.

-Yeah.

From the outside, it looks great.

-Uh-huh.

-From the inside, it's OK.

-Right...

-I think it's a bit on the small side, but I'm maybe just thinking extravagantly.

As the house goes, this is the biggest of the three.

-But is it the proportions of the rooms, do you think?

-It must be that.

My biggest concern with the house is just the location of it.

It seems like in the middle of the two places, which is a good compromise,

but I'm just worried that it's going to isolate us a little bit from...

Well, that was one of the gambles we thought was worth putting you here and seeing.

Knowing that, we have the final game of guess the price.

-Well, I've been doing rubbish at this!

-You have been!

You're playing for pride, Steph, to be fair.

I think it's 135.

135? That probably will be the wrong answer.

I'm going to make it 3-0 here.

I'm going for higher. I'm going to go for 138,500.

You've made it 3-0. But you're way off.

It's 149,950.

So ten grand over. Yeah...

Can we give it a grading system, as we're doing the school thing.

Jonnie, you're nervous.

Which one do you think?

-The wildcard's close to my heart.

-OK, we've got it.

-Oh, my goodness me.

-Yeah.

-All right, and the wildcard gets...?

-B!

-That's not so bad.

-See, he's happy there.

Right, well, you have to wander away

and make the decision about which one you wish to test-drive.

Wander off, nevertheless. We'll see you later.

Do you think they'll choose the house that they gave an A to?

-You never know. They might not like vowels.

-They might not.

So whilst they're deciding, here's a reminder for you people

back home of today's lesson that was today's three properties.

I went down the traditional and honest route today with my property, but was it too traditional

for our Steph and Simon, even with its honest price tag of £124,000?

Maybe, but they seemed to love my offering, the deceptively spacious

end of terrace in Bournville, on the market for 139,950.

Finally, there was the wildcard in Bartley Green...

..the modern semi situated half way between their schools

and their social lives, the price 149,950.

-In you go.

-Well, it looks like I've made the grade today with my choice, property number two.

All right, all right, don't go on.

Hey, I bet not many couples get to try that before they buy.

You know what? They're not even married yet!

Straight into the kitchen for Steph, and the clock's ticking.

That's because look's who's here.

It's Mum and Mum and Dad and Dad.

And they're off on a mini tour with Simon.

OK, so this is the living room.

-First impressions?

-I think very good.

-Pretty steep stairs.

-It is, yeah.

I'll show you through here.

-Big enough?

-Yeah. Very good.

Well, Steph's finished the family feast at last

and it's off to test-drive the all-important dining room.

Hello! There you go.

God bless this food, we pray, in Jesus' name, Amen. Amen.

ALL: Salute!

Salute, indeed.

-Now, a phenomenal thing has taken place today, because you've not test-driven the wildcard.

-No.

-No.

-And everyone always test-drives the wildcard.

You've test-driven whose house?

-Your house.

-So who's top of the class?

Today it's Ed, I'm afraid.

-I'm the dunce, aren't I?

-Well, your words.

It's all about tradition, really, today, the whole house search and the way you're going to be living.

We've got a separate dining room here.

You've been doing a bit of food prep. How did that go?

-Yeah, it went well.

-Was it an Italian smorgasbord of food?

It was an Italian feast, yeah.

All being good, subject to survey, To Buy Or Not To Buy?

-To buy.

-Yes! Well done.

-Best of luck.

-Have you had fun today?

-Yes.

-Very good, yes.

-Excellent. Well, good. Thank you very much.

-We'll see you soon.

-Bye.

Well, in educational terms, that, for me, was a lesson learned.

And for me, it was a lesson passed with flying colours, a lesson passed

with the grade of an A, I think, and yours was the grade of a...

-Which essentially is a pass, but I'm sure my mother would think I could do better.

-And you could do.

And what we aim for this in this programme is not As or Cs.

We aim for A*s.

A* guys delivering A* properties. We do, don't we?

What should they do if they're out there kind of wanting to find an A* house with an A* presenting team?

-Should they hesitate?

-No, don't hesitate.

Get in touch straightaway by e-mail,

by phone, by carrier pigeon, any which way you can.

-We'll see you soon. Bye-bye.

-Bye-bye.

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