Pennod 3 Y Salon


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-Y Salon has opened its doors

-once again.

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-While the scissors are out...

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-..the views on the week's news

-can be cutting!

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-Without Europe, parts of Wales

-would be Third World.

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-Can you keep still, please?

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-Watch my ears

-or it will be a disaster!

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-Hello, Mary.

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-Mary, how are you this week?

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-Stop looking at my boobs!

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-Too much information!

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-You can't change the past but you

-can influence what's going on.

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-Some good discussions today, Colin.

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-Welcome to Y Salon.

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-Wednesday was a day for lovers,

-St Dwynwen's Day.

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-There was plenty of love and romance

-across the salons.

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-As men, we certainly know

-how to spoil the women.

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-Do you know what she gets?

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-Do you know what she gets?

-

-Go on.

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-I get up first and prepare

-a light breakfast in bed.

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-She likes peppermint tea.

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-Is Huw romantic?

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-Is Huw romantic?

-

-Yes, he is.

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-I've already had some flowers.

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-She gets up at 9.30am and we go

-for a jog. Why are you laughing?

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-It's St Dwynwen's Day

-every day at ours!

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-Oh, really?

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-Then we have lunch in Beaumaris.

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-Go for a walk to Llanddwyn.

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-Jason, we haven't finished yet!

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-What have you got for Huw?

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-What have you got for Huw?

-

-Nothing!

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-We'll have food in Beaumaris.

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-She has a salmon sandwich

-and I have prawns.

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-Did you celebrate St Dwynwen's Day?

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-I used to send a card

-and receive one or two.

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-As the years have gone by,

-my hair has turned white.

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-As they say...

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-.."When there's snow in the

-mountain, it's cold in the valley"!

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-We then visit Llanddwyn

-or Llantysilio. It's lovely.

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-Good morning. How are you?

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-Good morning. How are you?

-

-Hello, gorgeous.

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-On St Dwynwen's Day, it's romantic

-to get your hair cut together...

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-..like husband and wife

-Olwen and Allan, in Bala.

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-It's gone a bit wild.

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-What did he get for you

-on St Dwynwen's Day?

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-He got me some lovely

-yellow flowers, yellow roses.

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-Roses? That's nice!

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-Do you get her roses every year?

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-Yes, if there are some

-in the cemetery!

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-I'll just watch Bridget Jones

-with some chocolates!

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-Chocolates and wine on your own

-is ideal.

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-My cards

-must still be stuck in the post.

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-Actually, I have never been given

-a card, flowers or anything...

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-..on Valentine's Day

-or St Dwynwen's Day.

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-Never in my life.

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-I've been waiting for a card

-for over 20 years!

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-Have you ever sent one?

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-Have you ever sent one?

-

-No, never.

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-You should send one.

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-If I get one,

-then I'll send one back.

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-I don't give, I just receive!

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-Nonsense, pure nonsense.

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-Mother's Day, Sister's Day,

-Brother's Day.

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-There isn't a Daughter's Day.

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-Between hairdressing and her

-husband Pete's funeral business...

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-..Llinos' salon in Cardigan

-is a busy place.

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-The morning after St Dwynwen's Day,

-Llinos wasn't cutting his hair.

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-Had there been problems

-during their romantic evening?

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-We were preparing to go out

-to The Cliff or the Emlyn Arms.

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-Then I had a call out

-and we couldn't go.

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-Llinos is sulking!

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-I brought her back sausage and chips

-so St Dwynwen's Day was fine.

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-A phone call, literally three

-minutes before we were leaving.

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-He had a call out.

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-He had a call out.

-

-Oh, no.

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-We weren't going anywhere.

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-But he's never out of work.

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-But he's never out of work.

-

-No, he's not.

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-Is the missus any good

-at helping you with the funerals?

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-She helps if required

-or if there's a big funeral.

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-I do everything behind the scenes.

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-I sort out the hair.

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-You do the make-up

-and the lipstick.

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-Can you imagine Pete doing that?

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-Oh, my God, the lipstick

-would be everywhere!

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-Sometimes when you collect them,

-they don't look their best.

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-It's nice to make them look nice

-for the families.

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-I like the tattoos today.

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-I had to get them out.

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-I had to get them out.

-

-Very, very nice.

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-They're too expensive to hide.

-I might as well show them.

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-Cath, have you ever had a tattoo?

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-I have a red dragon on my back.

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-I want a tattoo

-of my husband's name.

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-OK. Where are you going to have it?

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-OK. Where are you going to have it?

-

-There, under there.

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-Why do you want it there?

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-Why do you want it there?

-

-Under my thumb!

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-Poor old Huw!

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-I love men with tattoos.

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-You need to find a tattoo man.

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-You need to find a tattoo man.

-

-So fit.

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-And muscles -

-imagine muscles and tattoos!

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-They all represent something to me.

-I don't get any without a reason.

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-I don't tell people what they mean.

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-Do you have any tattoos?

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-Do you have any tattoos?

-

-Yes, I've got three.

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-No way!

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-Tell us where they are.

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-One is on the back of my neck.

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-One is on the back of my neck.

-

-No way.

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-Yes, there.

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-Yes, there.

-

-It's a cross.

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-That's for my lover.

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-I've got another one here.

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-I've also got an angel on my back.

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-I've got an angel

-across the whole of my back.

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-It's inscribed at the top

-with "The Lord is my Shepherd".

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-I have one, two, three, four...

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-..I've got five.

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-Oh, my God.

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-My mum goes nuts.

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-She hates them, but my dad has

-tattoos from here all the way down.

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-No, I don't like them.

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-Once you've got them,

-you've got them for life.

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-May I see the tiger again?

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-Oh, wow!

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-My son is getting a sleeve done

-at the moment.

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-I've seen it, it's a clock.

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-What?

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-What?

-

-A clock!

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-Oh, yes!

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-A clock!

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-In midweek, newspaper headlines

-claimed that burnt foods...

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-..might give you cancer.

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-I've always believed it

-with burnt food and carbon.

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-Things like burnt toast.

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-Carcinogens give you cancer.

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-Personally, I'm really iffy

-about things like this...

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-..because when I was 15,

-I had cancer myself.

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-Wow.

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-I watch things like that,

-not that I'm paranoid or anything.

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-Did the fact that you've had cancer

-push you to be fit and healthy?

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-It's my way

-of taking control of my life.

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-I'm a bodybuilder and I run a gym.

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-If anything happened to me now,

-I can say that I tried my very best.

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-It's simple as, really.

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-I remember

-reading a similar thing years ago...

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-..that said burnt foods

-were bad for you.

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-I have never...

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-I have never...

-

-..burnt the toast!

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-I have burnt toast

-but I don't let the kids eat it.

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-I saw about the toast

-and I eat everything well done!

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-My poor kids.

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-When things are burnt,

-they have a nice taste!

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-You'd never eat coal

-unless you were pregnant!

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-You just wouldn't.

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-Are you a bit of a chef?

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-No, I'm hopeless!

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-Do you burn everything?

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-I sometimes burn water

-whilst trying to boil it!

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-My roast potatoes are all black.

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-When I burn my toast, I just scrape

-the black stuff off the top.

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-It's fine then

-because it isn't burnt!

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-What happens at a barbecue?

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-Exactly!

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-Exactly!

-

-Everything is black!

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-I should have been dead years ago.

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-She burns everything!

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-She burns a boiled egg!

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-You married her!

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-I'd gone in to look for chips.

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-There was only one bag left

-in the far corner.

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-I tried to reach for it.

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-I lost my balance

-and fell into the deep freeze.

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-Only you would fall into one

-in Waitrose!

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-Oh, dear me!

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-They say one thing today and next

-week, they'll say something else.

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-These professors get big wages

-from the government...

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-..so every now and again, they

-have to justify their existence.

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-They come up

-with these kinds of statements...

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-..to show they're worth the money.

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-I've lived to be 92. I've eaten

-everything, all kinds of rubbish.

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-I love barbecues, especially

-at the Eisteddfod and in the summer.

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-Drink enough gin and you'll be fine.

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-Don't start me on that.

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-Gin is good for your diet.

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-Yes, it's good news for some.

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-There are five reasons

-why gin is good for you. Cheers!

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-Anwen uses gin in a lot of recipes.

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-She puts gin in cupcakes,

-in lemon drizzle cakes...

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-..and we also have gin

-with an orange flambe.

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-There are intoxicants in it.

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-There are intoxicants in it.

-

-He's always drunk!

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-We've also got gin in the caravan

-for when we go to the Eisteddfod.

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-I've never seen anywhere

-swimming in so much gin...

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-..than the Eisteddfod caravan site.

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-It's good for you.

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-It's good for you.

-

-Gin?

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-There we are, it's gin from now on.

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-Oh, gosh.

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-Gin is supposed to prevent arthritis

-and things like that.

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-Gin is in.

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-Gin is in.

-

-Gin is in!

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-They say it's good for you.

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-It has antioxidants in it.

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-It's made with a lot of herbs.

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-It's made with a lot of herbs.

-

-Oh, right, OK.

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-I think anything off the top shelf

-is good for you!

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-If you have a cold, whisky.

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-If you've got an upset stomach,

-port.

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-Port is good

-for settling your stomach.

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-For iron deficiency, you should

-drink Guinness or red wine.

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-I prefer vodka to gin.

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-I'm a gin girl. It's music to my

-ears - they say gin is good for you!

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-A woman I used to work with

-made sloe gin.

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-It was beautiful. It was nice.

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-She would put Prosecco on top of it.

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-I love gin in the sun

-and it gets you really drunk.

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-They say it makes you cry

-but I haven't cried yet.

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-Do you cry?

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-Do you cry?

-

-I cry when I can't get any!

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-On the weekend, the Maes

-in Caernarfon is full of women.

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-On Black Friday or when schools

-break up for half-term...

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-..it's dangerous out there.

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-These women have frontless

-and backless dresses!

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-I think women

-can really knock back the drinks.

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-Will you have a cuppa?

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-Will you have a cuppa?

-

-I'll have some more Prosecco!

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-It's nice coffee. Thanks, Llinos.

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-Sorry I don't have any gin!

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-It's enough to make you thirsty.

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-Time for a cuppa, but there'll

-be more from the salons shortly.

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-A seagull?!

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-I have a seagull that lives with me!

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-I have a seagull that lives with me!

-

-No way!

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-A chipmunk.

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-A chipmunk.

-

-Cool.

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-You've got a snake, haven't you?

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-A pet snake, he means!

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-.

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-Subtitles

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-Subtitles

-

-Subtitles

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-I remember you singing

-at the Caernarfon Food Festival.

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-He got drunk on the gin!

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-Why is he talking about gin?

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-# Do you think I'm sexy #

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-Go ahead, Col.

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-Welcome back.

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-Holy moly, women's rights

-are the talk of the salons...

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-..as everyone discusses

-the new Bishop of St David's.

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-Have you heard

-about the lady bishop?

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-Yes, fair play to her.

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-I'm with her all the way.

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-Yes, why not.

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-Very often,

-chapels are really struggling...

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-..to find someone

-to come and preach.

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-I'm all for women being ordained

-and becoming preachers.

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-They should have

-the same chances as men.

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-Yes.

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-I've heard too much

-being preached on Sundays...

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-..by male ministers

-who are getting on a bit.

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-Women are more in touch

-with the congregation and children.

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-I think a child would trust

-a woman in a frock more than a man.

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-Oh!

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-What do you think of that?

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-What do you think of that?

-

-I'm not sure about these women.

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-Really?

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-Well, good luck to her. If she makes

-a good job of it, fair enough.

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-Some women died in the fight

-to gain votes and so on for women.

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-It should be equal rights

-for everyone.

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-Who's the boss in your house?

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-Who's the boss in your house?

-

-My wife.

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-This one's the bishop in your house.

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-When I was a child, I used to go

-to Capel Noddfa, here in Caernarfon.

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-We had a female minister,

-Auntie Cath.

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-She was a real case.

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-I still see her around Caernarfon.

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-She had a huge influence on me.

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-A lot of the things

-she preached when I was a child...

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-..have stayed with me.

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-It's fair enough.

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-There's nothing wrong

-with women's brains.

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-They're smarter than men sometimes.

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-And we can multitask.

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-Men's brains are somewhere else.

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-Men's brains are somewhere else.

-

-Where do you think they are?

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-I'm not saying!

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-If you're religious

-it doesn't matter who's speaking.

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-The person standing there

-doesn't count.

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-Exactly. As long

-as they do their job properly.

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-It's supposed to be the word of God,

-not the word of man.

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-Think about it, Col.

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-Women rule the world anyway.

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-But running the country

-can be a bit of a marathon.

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-It was for Theresa May this week...

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-..between meeting Trump

-and discussing Brexit.

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-Theresa May

-- wow, she's gone all militant.

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-She's really militant

-against Europe.

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-She doesn't want to be

-in the single market.

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-She doesn't want to be

-part of anything.

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-She wants to do trade deals

-with everyone else in the world...

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-..apart from Europe, which is

-the biggest market in the world.

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-If it weren't for Europe...

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-..conditions in some parts of Wales

-would be like the Third World.

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-I don't understand

-why they're dragging their feet.

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-If the public have said

-"we want out", out it has to be.

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-I've heard,

-and this is allegedly, Colin...

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-..that a lot of farmers voted Leave.

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-Now they're saying, "What's going

-on? We're losing money on lambs."

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-Lambs are imported from New Zealand.

-They can't get European grants.

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-Do you trust the Assembly?

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-Do they give this area enough money?

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-Do they give this area enough money?

-

-Gosh, no!

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-They said today that Northern

-Ireland, Wales and Scotland...

0:16:140:16:19

-..wouldn't have a say in this.

0:16:190:16:22

-It's the same as usual.

0:16:220:16:24

-It's so unfair.

0:16:240:16:26

-We don't have our say.

0:16:260:16:28

-I can't understand

-why the people who voted Remain...

0:16:290:16:34

-..are still fighting hard

-to stay in Europe.

0:16:340:16:37

-Can't they accept a democratic vote?

0:16:380:16:42

-Nobody is ever happy

-with the government.

0:16:430:16:45

-Is anybody ever happy

-with the government?

0:16:460:16:49

-It doesn't happen.

0:16:490:16:51

-From the international stage

-to The X Factor stage.

0:16:520:16:55

-In Cardigan,

-we find Linda, who loves to sing.

0:16:550:16:58

-Have you entered

-singing competitions?

0:16:590:17:01

-You should go on X Factor.

0:17:020:17:03

-You should go on X Factor.

-

-I've been on X Factor.

0:17:030:17:05

-Did you have an audition?

0:17:050:17:07

-Yes, but it didn't go well.

0:17:070:17:10

-Were you nervous?

0:17:100:17:12

-We were sitting around from 9.00am

-stuffing our faces with sandwiches.

0:17:120:17:17

-Did a crust

-get stuck in your throat?

0:17:170:17:19

-Then they called me,

-"Linda Jenkins, blah, blah, blah".

0:17:200:17:24

-Well, I wasn't ready.

0:17:250:17:26

-Were you still

-munching your sandwich?

0:17:270:17:29

-I had no time to warm up my voice.

0:17:290:17:31

-What did you sing on X Factor?

0:17:320:17:34

-Sometimes When We...

-You... When We Touch.

0:17:340:17:37

-Give us a song, go on. Go on.

0:17:370:17:41

-I'm a soprano,

-Llinos isn't anything.

0:17:410:17:43

-I'll dance.

0:17:440:17:45

-Llinos will mime.

0:17:450:17:46

-Llinos will mime.

-

-I'd have to charge you, sorry.

0:17:460:17:48

-We're Little Mix.

0:17:490:17:49

-We're Little Mix.

-

-Or a free haircut?

0:17:490:17:51

-Little Minx!

0:17:510:17:52

-Linda refuses to open her mouth...

0:17:550:17:57

-..but closing rural bank branches...

0:17:570:17:59

-..was a hot topic

-throughout the country.

0:17:590:18:02

-What will we do

-if all the local banks close?

0:18:030:18:06

-That's no fun.

0:18:070:18:08

-A few have closed. I got a shock.

0:18:090:18:11

-Narberth, where else?

0:18:110:18:13

-Narberth, where else?

-

-Newcastle Emlyn.

0:18:130:18:14

-Newcastle Emlyn has closed.

0:18:150:18:16

-Newcastle Emlyn has closed.

-

-Llandysul.

0:18:160:18:17

-Do you do online banking?

0:18:170:18:19

-No.

0:18:190:18:20

-How will someone's grandmother cope?

0:18:210:18:24

-Computers don't help, do they?

0:18:240:18:27

-All this online banking and so on.

0:18:270:18:29

-I haven't got a computer.

-I don't understand them.

0:18:300:18:33

-I'm not on the Web, as they say.

0:18:330:18:36

-What am I going to do

-when the banks close?

0:18:360:18:39

-How are we going to cope?

0:18:390:18:41

-How are we going to cope?

-

-Yes, how will we cope?

0:18:410:18:42

-They don't think about

-rural communities.

0:18:430:18:45

-It's fine if you live in the city.

0:18:460:18:48

-You have everything

-on your house door.

0:18:480:18:51

-Your doorstep.

-You know what I mean.

0:18:520:18:54

-From banking pennies

-to saving pennies.

0:18:560:18:58

-A new financial services company

-has chosen an appropriate name...

0:18:590:19:03

-..but are people from Ceredigion

-really tight?

0:19:030:19:06

-Are you careful with money?

0:19:070:19:09

-Definitely.

0:19:090:19:10

-Definitely.

-

-Me too.

0:19:100:19:11

-We must watch the pennies.

0:19:110:19:12

-We must watch the pennies.

-

-Long pockets and short arms.

0:19:120:19:14

-No-one else will watch them for you.

0:19:140:19:16

-My mother is the same.

0:19:160:19:18

-Oh, my God.

-We can be freezing in the house.

0:19:180:19:21

-You wear a hat, gloves,

-three layers of clothing...

0:19:210:19:24

-..and only then

-she'll put the heat on.

0:19:240:19:27

-Because our house is so big,

-it takes time to warm up.

0:19:270:19:31

-Does she send you to bed at 7.00pm?!

0:19:310:19:33

-Does she send you to bed at 7.00pm?!

-

-With socks. Or a hot water bottle.

0:19:330:19:35

-I remember when Mam and Dad

-were doing up the house.

0:19:360:19:39

-Dad promised he'd get new carpets

-throughout the house.

0:19:390:19:43

-She was looking forward to it.

0:19:430:19:45

-All of a sudden, a lorry arrived.

0:19:460:19:48

-Dad had bought

-office, wafer-thin carpet.

0:19:480:19:52

-That's the way to do it.

0:19:530:19:55

-Many pets

-have become Internet sensations.

0:19:560:19:59

-There are plenty of tales

-of furry friends in the salon.

0:19:590:20:03

-Elis has a dog that likes pudding.

0:20:030:20:05

-Our dog Sali was a liability.

0:20:060:20:08

-Sali would steal food

-from the table.

0:20:090:20:11

-One Christmas, we put the food

-in the conservatory.

0:20:110:20:15

-The door was open

-and Sali went in and ate the trifle.

0:20:160:20:20

-She slept in the garage after that.

0:20:210:20:25

-I thought you would say turkey.

0:20:250:20:27

-She had a proper sweet tooth.

0:20:280:20:30

-She had a proper sweet tooth.

-

-She'd eat anything.

0:20:300:20:31

-With the children over the years,

-we've had all kinds of animals...

0:20:310:20:36

-..hamsters, gerbils,

-rabbits, snakes.

0:20:360:20:39

-You've got a snake, haven't you?

0:20:390:20:41

-A pet snake, he means.

0:20:420:20:45

-Not another kind of snake!

0:20:460:20:48

-The best thing I ever had

-was a chipmunk.

0:20:480:20:50

-Cool.

0:20:510:20:52

-A seagull?!

0:20:520:20:53

-A seagull?!

-

-A seagull.

0:20:530:20:54

-She's been living with me

-for four years.

0:20:540:20:58

-I've got a lovely white pussy.

0:20:580:21:00

-A little white pussy!

0:21:010:21:03

-How long is it since George died?

0:21:040:21:06

-How long is it since George died?

-

-Five years.

0:21:060:21:07

-Is it that long ago?

0:21:070:21:08

-Is it that long ago?

-

-Yes.

0:21:080:21:09

-Goodness me. I'm sure

-you miss him around the place.

0:21:100:21:14

-He's still in the house.

0:21:140:21:16

-What do you mean?

0:21:160:21:17

-He's in the living room

-in a little box...

0:21:180:21:21

-..and I have his fur in a keyring.

0:21:210:21:23

-I thought you were going to say

-you'd had him stuffed.

0:21:230:21:27

-Oh, no!

0:21:270:21:28

-The last pet I had was a tortoise.

0:21:280:21:31

-After that...

0:21:320:21:33

-You know how they hibernate

-in the winter?

0:21:330:21:36

-I watched Blue Peter and put him

-in a box under the sink...

0:21:360:21:40

-..as instructed.

0:21:400:21:41

-A few months later, there

-was a funny smell in the kitchen.

0:21:410:21:45

-We thought the drain was blocked.

0:21:450:21:48

-In April, it was time

-to check on the tortoise.

0:21:490:21:52

-I opened the box and lifted him out

-and his head and legs fell off.

0:21:520:21:57

-I never watched Blue Peter

-after that.

0:21:590:22:02

-When I got them as kittens,

-I thought they were two females.

0:22:030:22:07

-Lewis was lying on the sofa

-and all I saw was...

0:22:070:22:12

-It turned out he was a boy.

0:22:160:22:19

-Oh, my God, I phoned Neil.

0:22:190:22:21

-"That cat isn't a girl,

-I've just seen his willy."

0:22:210:22:25

-I've decided I want a micro pig.

0:22:260:22:28

-I used to want a monkey.

0:22:280:22:30

-I used to want a monkey.

-

-A monkey?

0:22:300:22:31

-I'm married to one now!

0:22:310:22:33

-My son Iwan has a bearded dragon.

0:22:340:22:38

-It's a lizard this big.

0:22:380:22:40

-Thinking about it, we call him

-Dave the bearded dragon.

0:22:400:22:44

-We should have called him Colin.

0:22:450:22:47

-He looks like Col.

0:22:470:22:49

-No, Col is Rod Stewart.

0:22:500:22:52

-Col is Rod Stewart.

0:22:520:22:54

-He can't sing like me.

0:22:540:22:55

-He can't sing like me.

-

-Brill.

0:22:550:22:56

-Yes, they raised the roof

-at Llinos' salon in the end.

0:22:570:23:01

-# And I have to close my eyes

-and cry

0:23:010:23:04

-# I want to hold you till I die

0:23:050:23:08

-# Till we both break down and cry

0:23:090:23:12

-# I want to hold you

0:23:130:23:15

-# Till the fear in me subsides #

0:23:150:23:20

-Where are the tissues?

0:23:200:23:21

-Where are the tissues?

-

-Oh, my God.

0:23:210:23:22

-On that note, it's time to close the

-doors to Y Salon until next week.

0:23:220:23:26

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0:23:450:23:47

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