Browse content similar to 24/10/2011. Check below for episodes and series from the same categories and more!
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On tonight's Inside Out, the true cost of university. Moneyman, Alvin | 0:00:00 | 0:00:08 | |
Hall, as the ultimate guide to the new fees. �75,000. Is that just the | 0:00:08 | 0:00:12 | |
one person? That is just for one person. And he has got some handy | 0:00:12 | 0:00:18 | |
tips on how to avoid them. Record producer Pete Waterman | 0:00:18 | 0:00:21 | |
argues youngsters should think again before taking on university | 0:00:21 | 0:00:25 | |
debt. But can he be convinced of the value of a university | 0:00:25 | 0:00:33 | |
education? They did not say to him, do you have a university degrees? | 0:00:33 | 0:00:37 | |
But he would not have had big business in the first place! | 0:00:37 | 0:00:44 | |
did not make the film! What happens when eight when it dies. The adults | 0:00:44 | 0:00:49 | |
are still struggling to cope it years later -- went a twin dies. | 0:00:49 | 0:00:55 | |
it is like losing half of yourself. I am Mary Rhodes and this is Inside | 0:00:55 | 0:01:05 | |
0:01:05 | 0:01:11 | ||
More than 80% of students studying for A-levels in the Midlands say | 0:01:11 | 0:01:15 | |
they are worried about the level of debt they will face if they go to | 0:01:15 | 0:01:19 | |
university. And they believe it is wrong to ask young people to pay | 0:01:19 | 0:01:26 | |
more for their education. But a survey commissioned by ComRes for | 0:01:26 | 0:01:30 | |
its Inside Out so that most are still believe the benefits outweigh | 0:01:30 | 0:01:34 | |
the costs. Are they right? Not according to Coventry born record | 0:01:34 | 0:01:41 | |
producer Pete Waterman. Music mogul Pete Waterman is a | 0:01:41 | 0:01:44 | |
self-made man. He left school in Coventry without any qualifications. | 0:01:44 | 0:01:49 | |
He went on to make millions managing acts like Kylie and Jason. | 0:01:49 | 0:01:54 | |
Today, for one day only, he is going to university. What were you | 0:01:54 | 0:02:00 | |
doing last night? Where you out clubbing? No. I thought students | 0:02:00 | 0:02:06 | |
went out clubbing every night! things courses like this one at | 0:02:06 | 0:02:09 | |
Staffordshire University in Stoke are a waste of money and claims to | 0:02:09 | 0:02:14 | |
have statistics to prove it. think that some universities are | 0:02:14 | 0:02:16 | |
completely ripping off students with the ridiculous courses that | 0:02:16 | 0:02:21 | |
they have to pay far and there is no future for that cause or that | 0:02:21 | 0:02:27 | |
job. Is it in the public's interest in everything... But Professor | 0:02:27 | 0:02:32 | |
Cashmore disagrees. Despite the imminent hike in fees to nearly | 0:02:32 | 0:02:36 | |
�9,000 the year, he believes young people should go to university. He | 0:02:36 | 0:02:41 | |
believes he can convince Pete to change his mind. I know a lot of | 0:02:41 | 0:02:46 | |
people think the �30,000 pot a university education and you end up | 0:02:46 | 0:02:52 | |
better off? You do it end up a it lot better off. I am going to try | 0:02:52 | 0:02:56 | |
to persuade Pete Waterman that it is worth it. After the lecture, the | 0:02:56 | 0:03:03 | |
two men meet and Professor Cashmore reveals he has a plan. Look at, | 0:03:03 | 0:03:07 | |
Pete. I know you are a sceptic about university education. Today I | 0:03:07 | 0:03:11 | |
am going to introduce you to a few people who I think might change | 0:03:11 | 0:03:16 | |
your mind. I am never too old to change my mind. I think we have | 0:03:16 | 0:03:20 | |
come to believe that universities are right for everyone but quite | 0:03:20 | 0:03:26 | |
plainly they are not. Therefore, it is slightly over sold. I have no | 0:03:26 | 0:03:30 | |
problem with studying, I have no problem that doctors and people | 0:03:30 | 0:03:36 | |
like that need a higher education. But some of the degrees now order | 0:03:36 | 0:03:40 | |
on the ridiculous. I am telling you that university education does pay. | 0:03:40 | 0:03:45 | |
Not simply in terms of money, but in terms of an overall enhancement | 0:03:45 | 0:03:54 | |
of one's intellect. Pete did not go to university but | 0:03:54 | 0:03:58 | |
his daughter did. A chip off the old block, she wants to get into | 0:03:58 | 0:04:03 | |
the music industry. She ignored had bad's advice and did a degree in | 0:04:03 | 0:04:07 | |
vocal performance and production. She has just graduated with a first | 0:04:07 | 0:04:11 | |
and is looking for a job. He is very set in his ways and he does | 0:04:11 | 0:04:14 | |
not see that there might be some benefit in going to university that | 0:04:14 | 0:04:19 | |
does not include a job at the end of it. Sometimes you get the live | 0:04:19 | 0:04:23 | |
experience in the three years. He things you get your wife exposed by | 0:04:23 | 0:04:31 | |
working your way up the ladder. -- life experience. I think it will be | 0:04:31 | 0:04:39 | |
hard to change his mind. He is a pretty stubborn person. Good luck! | 0:04:39 | 0:04:43 | |
Back in Stoke, Professor Cashmore has brought Pete to the union bar | 0:04:43 | 0:04:48 | |
to meet some current students. see it as an investment in my | 0:04:48 | 0:04:53 | |
future. You learn that so much about yourself and about people | 0:04:53 | 0:04:58 | |
around do that helps you. Pete has a surprise for these students. He | 0:04:58 | 0:05:03 | |
has got hold of some of graduate employment statistics. The figures | 0:05:03 | 0:05:06 | |
come from the government's higher education industry and they are | 0:05:06 | 0:05:12 | |
alarming. Fewer than half of students in the West Midlands get a | 0:05:12 | 0:05:16 | |
graduate level job within six months of graduating. I have not | 0:05:16 | 0:05:20 | |
seen this before but looking at it for the first time, it has not put | 0:05:20 | 0:05:24 | |
me off. I am confident enough in my own abilities to succeed and | 0:05:24 | 0:05:28 | |
confident enough in my degree course at what I am going to put in | 0:05:28 | 0:05:33 | |
to finding a job to know that I will get into employment when I | 0:05:33 | 0:05:43 | |
0:05:43 | 0:05:43 | ||
graduate. I it am glad they are positive. If we could spend �20,000 | 0:05:43 | 0:05:48 | |
and get every kid in the country do have that much optimism, that is a | 0:05:48 | 0:05:51 | |
great 20 doesn't pounds. But I do not think we have tackled the | 0:05:51 | 0:05:55 | |
problem yet of what we are training them for, how many jobs that are | 0:05:55 | 0:06:02 | |
and how the world is going. With Pete still not convinced, Professor | 0:06:02 | 0:06:07 | |
Cashmore invites him to meet a recent graduate. This man left | 0:06:07 | 0:06:11 | |
Stafford University three years ago with a degree in Business | 0:06:11 | 0:06:14 | |
Information Technology. It got him a job at Capula, a company that | 0:06:14 | 0:06:19 | |
builds computer networks. Was it worth it? A yes, before university, | 0:06:19 | 0:06:25 | |
I have no idea what I wanted to do. It gave me an idea of what was | 0:06:25 | 0:06:30 | |
available, when I went to university. You were driven by the | 0:06:30 | 0:06:34 | |
university and the courses that you went on. It broadened my horizons. | 0:06:34 | 0:06:40 | |
It is something I would definitely do. Professor Cashmore also wants - | 0:06:40 | 0:06:46 | |
- Pete to meet his boss who is recruiting 25 new graduates this | 0:06:46 | 0:06:50 | |
year Vostok I am a firm believer that people going to university | 0:06:50 | 0:06:54 | |
should be going with a specific goal in mind and I disagree with | 0:06:54 | 0:06:58 | |
people doing a variety of subjects not knowing what they're going to | 0:06:58 | 0:07:02 | |
do, particularly as the cost of going to university is increasing, | 0:07:02 | 0:07:07 | |
you shadow -- should have a very good idea of what you are going to | 0:07:08 | 0:07:16 | |
do afterwards. Of a man after my own heart. Professor Cashmore's | 0:07:16 | 0:07:21 | |
plan might have backfired. His trip to Capula has confirmed what Pete | 0:07:21 | 0:07:26 | |
already believes. A degree that is a job specific is fine, but the | 0:07:26 | 0:07:31 | |
others are a waste of time. For the charge that has taken the chance, | 0:07:31 | 0:07:37 | |
seen an opportunity, and that works for them. If all of the | 0:07:37 | 0:07:45 | |
universities did that, I would pay for it myself. Can a Professor | 0:07:45 | 0:07:50 | |
Cashmore poll it background with his last visit? This man graduated | 0:07:50 | 0:07:56 | |
from Staffordshire 11 years ago, with a degree in media technology. | 0:07:56 | 0:08:04 | |
This is a viral film and cinema commercial. Afterwards, he set up | 0:08:04 | 0:08:07 | |
his own video production technology and he is convinced he could not | 0:08:07 | 0:08:12 | |
have done it if he had not gone to university. During the top of his | 0:08:12 | 0:08:19 | |
officers, the debate heats up. did not say to him, do you have a | 0:08:19 | 0:08:24 | |
university degree? But he would not have had the business in the first | 0:08:24 | 0:08:31 | |
place. But you did not make the film?! I can tell you how the | 0:08:32 | 0:08:35 | |
degree helped me. I will show you the rest of the business first and | 0:08:35 | 0:08:41 | |
then we can continue the discussions. When I went to | 0:08:41 | 0:08:45 | |
university, I did a placement which gave me all of the skills I needed | 0:08:45 | 0:08:48 | |
to start the business and to understand how business works. I | 0:08:48 | 0:08:52 | |
know for certain that I would not be here and his business would not | 0:08:52 | 0:08:55 | |
be here if it was not for university. There is no question in | 0:08:55 | 0:09:00 | |
my mind. He does not know if he has convinced the music mogul but he is | 0:09:00 | 0:09:06 | |
sure of one thing. He wants Pete's signatures on this album, one of | 0:09:06 | 0:09:11 | |
his most successful releases. changed your life? It certainly did. | 0:09:11 | 0:09:18 | |
It changed mine too. Has Professor Cashmore managed to convince Pete | 0:09:18 | 0:09:23 | |
that it is Europe that -- where the money? Even if it means racking up | 0:09:23 | 0:09:29 | |
almost �50,000 worth of debt? because what I have seen is exactly | 0:09:29 | 0:09:33 | |
what I thought. I have no problem at university, let us get that | 0:09:33 | 0:09:38 | |
straight. I think learning is vitally important and there is not | 0:09:38 | 0:09:42 | |
enough learning in this country, in fact. What I believe is that we are | 0:09:42 | 0:09:48 | |
too focused on universities and not focused enough on general education. | 0:09:48 | 0:09:55 | |
Best of luck. Pete is a guy who sticks stubbornly to his position. | 0:09:55 | 0:09:58 | |
What can you do? Your present evidence and hope that people | 0:09:59 | 0:10:08 | |
0:10:09 | 0:10:13 | ||
change. When they don't, you think, Is it worth going to university? | 0:10:13 | 0:10:16 | |
Our survey suggested that well over half the students currently working | 0:10:16 | 0:10:21 | |
to get their A-levels would consider an apprenticeship rather | 0:10:21 | 0:10:25 | |
than university if they could gain qualifications. Nearly half are | 0:10:25 | 0:10:30 | |
beginning to look abroad for cheaper options. We asked moneyman | 0:10:30 | 0:10:33 | |
Alvin Hall to come up with a guide to the fees and the some sneaky | 0:10:34 | 0:10:41 | |
ways to avoid them. Young, confused and afraid? This is | 0:10:41 | 0:10:47 | |
what thousands of teenagers across England fear, a lifetime on the run. | 0:10:47 | 0:10:57 | |
But what is chasing them? Student debt. But is it really going to be | 0:10:57 | 0:11:00 | |
the horror-movie that we have been led to believe? Where there you | 0:11:00 | 0:11:05 | |
think next year's hike in fees is fair or not, it is happening. Young | 0:11:05 | 0:11:09 | |
people need to know the facts. I am going to show you what a degree can | 0:11:09 | 0:11:16 | |
really cost and how you can avoid those fees altogether. Next year, | 0:11:16 | 0:11:20 | |
English universities will charge up to �9,000 the year with living | 0:11:20 | 0:11:26 | |
costs on top, graduates can face up to debts -- debts of up to �50,000. | 0:11:26 | 0:11:31 | |
But how much will they actually end up paying back? I have come to meet | 0:11:31 | 0:11:35 | |
some sixth-formers in Birmingham to show them. I think the number is | 0:11:35 | 0:11:40 | |
going to shock them. I think that earning interest over such a long | 0:11:40 | 0:11:43 | |
time paying back the loan really is a number that most people do not | 0:11:43 | 0:11:48 | |
think about. Let us imagine that you graduate from university with | 0:11:48 | 0:11:54 | |
�50,000 worth of debt. You get a high-paying job like we expect | 0:11:54 | 0:11:59 | |
Jacob here will get. How much of that money do you have to pay back? | 0:11:59 | 0:12:05 | |
I am not quite sure but is it all of it? You have to pay back all of | 0:12:05 | 0:12:15 | |
0:12:15 | 0:12:20 | ||
it and more... Interest! O god. God, that is right. �75,000. | 0:12:20 | 0:12:27 | |
that just or one person? That is just for one person. Crazy. Is that | 0:12:27 | 0:12:37 | |
0:12:37 | 0:12:40 | ||
for the average degree? Three years, What it their careers don't go as | 0:12:40 | 0:12:45 | |
planned and they never and more than What -- �21,000 a year? The | 0:12:45 | 0:12:52 | |
amount you have to pay back his... 0. -- the amount you have to pay | 0:12:52 | 0:12:57 | |
back his. What is going on? The repayment of the loan works like | 0:12:57 | 0:13:02 | |
taxes, the more you earn, the more you pay back. If you never earn | 0:13:02 | 0:13:08 | |
above a certain amount, you never paid back a penny. The new | 0:13:08 | 0:13:13 | |
independent taskforce on student finance is led by Martyn Lewis. | 0:13:13 | 0:13:18 | |
biggest confusion is people confusing the price tag, these | 0:13:18 | 0:13:24 | |
�9,000 fees, totalling �50,000, with the actual cost. This is a | 0:13:24 | 0:13:28 | |
different type of system. Many people would come close to repaying | 0:13:28 | 0:13:33 | |
him for what they borrowed and some will not repay anything at all. The | 0:13:33 | 0:13:36 | |
Goldring fact we are putting people off going to university because | 0:13:36 | 0:13:39 | |
they are looking at the price tag and not the cost is the biggest | 0:13:39 | 0:13:44 | |
problem to meet the stop most graduates will face large debt. | 0:13:44 | 0:13:49 | |
there any way of avoiding the fees? Well, yes. You can study abroad. At | 0:13:49 | 0:13:54 | |
the recent student World Fair in London, teenagers discover just how | 0:13:54 | 0:14:00 | |
much they can save. I think everyone would rather go to | 0:14:00 | 0:14:05 | |
university where they are paying �1,000 cheaper. The seas are | 0:14:05 | 0:14:09 | |
cheaper which is attractive, so you will not be in so much dead. | 0:14:09 | 0:14:13 | |
fact, dozens of universities across Europe offer courses taught in | 0:14:13 | 0:14:18 | |
English. The fees differ from country to country but in | 0:14:18 | 0:14:22 | |
Scandinavia, tuition is free. Denmark, there is no tuition fee at | 0:14:22 | 0:14:27 | |
all because the Danish government pays for Danish students and, | 0:14:27 | 0:14:32 | |
according to EU rules, we have to treat other EU citizens alike. | 0:14:32 | 0:14:36 | |
Harriet Moore has already taken the plunge. She's off back to uni in | 0:14:36 | 0:14:44 | |
Slovakia. I am trying to save money on my flight so hand luggage it is! | 0:14:44 | 0:14:47 | |
Over there, she saves a fortune on living costs spending just �100 a | 0:14:47 | 0:14:52 | |
month. I caught up with her via webcam. What would be the piece of | 0:14:52 | 0:14:55 | |
advice that you would give to anyone considering doing what you | 0:14:55 | 0:15:00 | |
have done? I think if you're even considering it, I think you should | 0:15:00 | 0:15:04 | |
go for it. Definitely. It's worth doing. You just get on the plane. | 0:15:04 | 0:15:07 | |
You have to be a bit brave on the first plane journey over but I've | 0:15:08 | 0:15:17 | |
0:15:18 | 0:15:28 | ||
Time's up. I want my money. I want my 50 grand. So, studying overseas | 0:15:28 | 0:15:33 | |
may be one way to outrun the debt. But there are downsides. If you | 0:15:33 | 0:15:36 | |
study abroad, the Government here won't make you a loan. Only some of | 0:15:36 | 0:15:41 | |
the courses are taught in English. And employers might not recognise | 0:15:41 | 0:15:46 | |
foreign degrees. So you need to do your homework. Another way of | 0:15:47 | 0:15:51 | |
beating the fees is to get someone else to pay. But who? Well, | 0:15:51 | 0:15:55 | |
London's financial heartland is a good place to look. Don't be fooled | 0:15:55 | 0:15:59 | |
by the power suits. Believe it or not, these youngsters are all | 0:15:59 | 0:16:08 | |
freshers. They're being sponsored by accountancy giant KPMG. | 0:16:08 | 0:16:11 | |
entire package was a degree, a salary, the tuition fees were paid | 0:16:11 | 0:16:17 | |
and a job at the end. And you obviously were helped to become a | 0:16:17 | 0:16:23 | |
qualified chartered accountant. you think there was a catch in it? | 0:16:23 | 0:16:30 | |
It sounds too good to be true, doesn't it? I haven't seen a catch. | 0:16:30 | 0:16:33 | |
You know, as with everything in life, you have to work hard and | 0:16:33 | 0:16:36 | |
that's the only catch, I guess. the man who runs the programme | 0:16:36 | 0:16:41 | |
tells me KPMG don't offer the stereotypical student experience. | 0:16:41 | 0:16:44 | |
They've got to work for us, they've got to study for their degree and | 0:16:44 | 0:16:47 | |
they've also got to obtain their chartered accountant qualification | 0:16:47 | 0:16:52 | |
in six years. That will require hard work and that's all we really | 0:16:52 | 0:16:58 | |
ask of the students who are joining us. And then there are bursaries. | 0:16:58 | 0:17:00 | |
Students from low-income families can get money from various sources | 0:17:00 | 0:17:09 | |
so it's worth trawling the web. But is there another way of escaping | 0:17:09 | 0:17:18 | |
the debt? Well, you could pay up front. 16-year-old Safina Adam is | 0:17:18 | 0:17:24 | |
trying to do just that. As well as studying for her A-levels, she | 0:17:24 | 0:17:30 | |
sells beauty products on her website. I started my business | 0:17:30 | 0:17:33 | |
because I wanted to save up for university and my parents said that | 0:17:33 | 0:17:36 | |
because of the rise in prices of university fees, it would be too | 0:17:36 | 0:17:46 | |
0:17:46 | 0:17:47 | ||
much for them to pay for it. I'm hoping to avoid getting in debt. | 0:17:47 | 0:17:51 | |
Because I know it takes a while to get out of debt and I don't want to | 0:17:51 | 0:17:55 | |
be in that place. The Government allows students to pay up front. | 0:17:55 | 0:17:59 | |
But most will have to take out a loan. But one financial expert | 0:17:59 | 0:18:01 | |
believes that graduates could end up paying back far more than anyone | 0:18:02 | 0:18:04 | |
has predicted. Financial journalist William Cullerne Bowne is warning | 0:18:04 | 0:18:10 | |
students to beware. I think the problem is that the deal is | 0:18:10 | 0:18:15 | |
actually not a deal. There are all these numbers flying about saying | 0:18:15 | 0:18:18 | |
that you'll be charged a certain amount of interest on the loan, | 0:18:18 | 0:18:22 | |
that your repayments will start at �21,000. Over that, you'll be | 0:18:22 | 0:18:25 | |
paying a certain percentage. But actually none of those parameters | 0:18:25 | 0:18:29 | |
are in the contract that the student signs up for. And, in fact, | 0:18:29 | 0:18:32 | |
the Government can change those numbers if it wants to in five | 0:18:32 | 0:18:37 | |
years time or ten years time, 20 years time... 30 years time. So | 0:18:37 | 0:18:42 | |
students could end up paying a lot more. But any big changes would | 0:18:42 | 0:18:47 | |
have to be approved by Parliament. Like many Americans, I graduated | 0:18:47 | 0:18:51 | |
with the equivalent of tens of thousands of pounds worth of debt. | 0:18:51 | 0:18:55 | |
It was daunting. But if you know the facts, student debt doesn't | 0:18:55 | 0:19:05 | |
0:19:05 | 0:19:13 | ||
have to be scary. I confronted it. And so can you. | 0:19:13 | 0:19:17 | |
Alvin Hall with some morale- boosting advise. There are signs | 0:19:17 | 0:19:21 | |
that some local universities are try to come up with cheap option | 0:19:21 | 0:19:24 | |
such as Coventry's two-year part- time degree announced last week. If | 0:19:25 | 0:19:33 | |
you have got any thoughts about the university fees, drop me any male. | 0:19:33 | 0:19:38 | |
-- drop me an e-mail. For our final story, we venture into the | 0:19:39 | 0:19:43 | |
fascinating world of twins. And the devastation caused when the twin | 0:19:43 | 0:19:52 | |
dies. Twins are one of the miracles of | 0:19:52 | 0:19:57 | |
life. In the case of identical twins, one a creating not just two | 0:19:57 | 0:20:03 | |
people but a lifelong -- lifelong bond. -- 1 go. Joan Woodward lost | 0:20:03 | 0:20:09 | |
her twin when she was three years old. Despite her being so young, | 0:20:09 | 0:20:14 | |
she believes her death had a lasting effect. There is no doubt | 0:20:14 | 0:20:17 | |
whatsoever that what it produced was extreme levels of anxiety. And | 0:20:17 | 0:20:24 | |
that I was very lonely. And that, in a way, it is quite well known | 0:20:24 | 0:20:28 | |
among other lone twins that talk about it, because, after all, I | 0:20:28 | 0:20:32 | |
have met very many lone twins, the sense that something is missing, | 0:20:32 | 0:20:36 | |
that something is not there that should be there, the seating of | 0:20:36 | 0:20:40 | |
closeness. I think one of the hardest bits is you want to find | 0:20:40 | 0:20:44 | |
that closeness again but it is never available. In the 80s, she | 0:20:44 | 0:20:48 | |
wrote a book on the subject and interviewed more than 200 lone | 0:20:48 | 0:20:52 | |
twins. Some had lost their twin in adulthood, some in childhood and | 0:20:52 | 0:20:57 | |
some at birth. I think other people were surprised to find how much | 0:20:57 | 0:21:02 | |
twins who had lost their twin at birth was so deeply affected. Of | 0:21:02 | 0:21:08 | |
course that is because there is a lot of evidence to show that the | 0:21:08 | 0:21:14 | |
thing that mattered for those twins was the parental response to the | 0:21:14 | 0:21:20 | |
loss. You know, for mothers to have this agonising experience of giving | 0:21:20 | 0:21:24 | |
birth to one child who is alive and, at the same time, giving birth to a | 0:21:24 | 0:21:29 | |
job that is dead, that is a very traumatic experience. Very painful. | 0:21:29 | 0:21:35 | |
How do you adore one when you're happy and we don't feel terrible -- | 0:21:35 | 0:21:39 | |
terribly sad about the other? been interviewed so many lone twins, | 0:21:39 | 0:21:42 | |
she decided to set up a support network for them and they need a | 0:21:42 | 0:21:47 | |
couple of times a year. It is not a therapy group. It is what the twins | 0:21:47 | 0:21:51 | |
can offer each other in understanding and listening to each | 0:21:51 | 0:21:57 | |
other. Since the 1980s, the group has grown. Its website is run by | 0:21:57 | 0:22:03 | |
Nancy Power crew lost her twin, Jane, to suicide when they were 20. | 0:22:03 | 0:22:08 | |
I didn't know how to cope. I had no idea how to... It was not something | 0:22:08 | 0:22:13 | |
I was expecting to have to deal with. I expected to deal with my | 0:22:14 | 0:22:17 | |
parents or other family members dying, but not my sister. Even | 0:22:17 | 0:22:21 | |
though we were not identical, and still felt we were two halves of | 0:22:21 | 0:22:27 | |
one hole. I was the shy one, she was the odd going on. I was the | 0:22:27 | 0:22:30 | |
most tedious one, she was the one that went out fagging it behind the | 0:22:30 | 0:22:35 | |
bike shed and stayed out late at just was more vivacious and | 0:22:35 | 0:22:39 | |
outgoing, and I was shy and retiring, getting on with my little | 0:22:39 | 0:22:43 | |
hobbies. We each had abilities we gave to the other hand I would help | 0:22:43 | 0:22:47 | |
her out with Bob -- with the more academic things, and because of her, | 0:22:48 | 0:22:54 | |
I might have got more outgoing. And I needed her to help me with that, | 0:22:54 | 0:22:59 | |
and she needed me to help her with other things. As soon as that goes, | 0:22:59 | 0:23:04 | |
it is like I felt so lost, and I didn't know... That is the only way | 0:23:05 | 0:23:08 | |
to describe it. I felt completely lost, and didn't know how to | 0:23:08 | 0:23:18 | |
function. It is like... You know, losing half of yourself. Nancy | 0:23:18 | 0:23:21 | |
joined the Lone Twin Network eight years ago and has drawn huge | 0:23:21 | 0:23:29 | |
strength from the support of others. I felt I am not a freak. I'm not | 0:23:29 | 0:23:34 | |
mad for thinking... Because the stuff that goes through your head, | 0:23:34 | 0:23:38 | |
I was going, right, I am going to say what is in my head, this is my | 0:23:38 | 0:23:43 | |
way of thinking. And so I said it, and everyone was nodding around the | 0:23:43 | 0:23:47 | |
group and people saying oh, yes. I have thought that. And I have | 0:23:47 | 0:23:52 | |
thought that. And I thought, oh, right, I am not completely crazy. | 0:23:52 | 0:24:00 | |
Which is the good thing. We can all be crazy to get the. This is the | 0:24:00 | 0:24:05 | |
memorial cloth that I have taken over from other ladies that started | 0:24:05 | 0:24:15 | |
0:24:15 | 0:24:16 | ||
it. It has members names on it with their twins name at the side of it | 0:24:16 | 0:24:20 | |
as a memorial, something a bit more permanent of their twin. It is good | 0:24:20 | 0:24:25 | |
for people that have lost their twin at birth and don't have a | 0:24:25 | 0:24:32 | |
grave to visit or any other kind of memories, or any photographs. There | 0:24:32 | 0:24:38 | |
is something somewhere that is giving their twin a place in the | 0:24:38 | 0:24:44 | |
world. Perhaps that is the most difficult aspect for outsiders to | 0:24:44 | 0:24:49 | |
understand. The grief of those who lost their twin at birth. People | 0:24:49 | 0:24:54 | |
like Jill Ingham cruised win, Julie, was stillborn. She didn't realise | 0:24:54 | 0:25:01 | |
the effect of this until she was in her 20s. It was intense insecurity. | 0:25:01 | 0:25:05 | |
Feeling very frightened about what was going to happen next. I | 0:25:05 | 0:25:09 | |
remember thinking, I don't know what is going to happen. People | 0:25:09 | 0:25:14 | |
would ask a, what do you mean? It was great insecurity. Add a sense | 0:25:14 | 0:25:21 | |
of looking for something. -- and a sense. I spent a lot of time in | 0:25:21 | 0:25:26 | |
foreign cities studying languages and I found myself wandering around, | 0:25:26 | 0:25:30 | |
looking for something, and a feeling of unease and not being | 0:25:30 | 0:25:36 | |
relaxed. That is how it manifested. Like many stillborn children, hurt | 0:25:36 | 0:25:40 | |
when was buried in a grave of an adult that had died at the same | 0:25:40 | 0:25:44 | |
time. The lone twin network was able to help her locate her | 0:25:44 | 0:25:53 | |
unmarked grave. I went along and had a nice plaque made with the | 0:25:53 | 0:26:02 | |
date on. That was 2003. And a little message to her. And it just | 0:26:02 | 0:26:09 | |
felt... I had some flowers. And my parents were very surprised that I | 0:26:09 | 0:26:12 | |
had managed to do all of this through Lone Twin Network, because | 0:26:12 | 0:26:19 | |
they didn't have a clue how to do it. We all felt better for it. | 0:26:19 | 0:26:23 | |
Having found peace through the Lone Twin Network, she wants to now help | 0:26:23 | 0:26:30 | |
others by setting up more regional branches. We have got our first | 0:26:30 | 0:26:34 | |
meeting on 29th October and details can be found on the Lone Twin | 0:26:34 | 0:26:39 | |
Network website. So we will have that. It will be for an afternoon, | 0:26:39 | 0:26:45 | |
with tea and cakes, and that sort of thing. And we go will discuss at | 0:26:45 | 0:26:48 | |
the end of the session what people want to do, whether they think | 0:26:48 | 0:26:54 | |
twice a year or it will be what people want it to be. Twins don't | 0:26:54 | 0:26:58 | |
trust share a birthday it. They share a symbiosis, a special bond, | 0:26:58 | 0:27:02 | |
impossible to replicate. With the help of others in the same | 0:27:02 | 0:27:06 | |
situation, lone twins can find a way through their grief and, in | 0:27:06 | 0:27:13 | |
turn, be of help to others. We did have a very good couple of | 0:27:13 | 0:27:17 | |
sessions in which lone twins went and met parents who had recently | 0:27:17 | 0:27:25 | |
lost a baby. And it was full of the motion, but we felt able to say, | 0:27:25 | 0:27:29 | |
look, we are here, we are interested -- living interesting | 0:27:29 | 0:27:33 | |
lives. Don't start thinking it is a terrible loss. Try to make the | 0:27:33 | 0:27:41 | |
person feel alive they have a good life, and make them glad they had a | 0:27:41 | 0:27:45 | |
twin, and make the most of what they are, because being a lone twin | 0:27:45 | 0:27:50 | |
is a special person. If you have been affected by the | 0:27:50 | 0:27:57 | |
item, you can find details of the Support Group on our Facebook page. | 0:27:57 | 0:28:02 | |
That is all from us for tonight's. On next week's programme, they were | 0:28:02 | 0:28:06 | |
set -- sent to Canada from children's homes in Birmingham. Now | 0:28:06 | 0:28:10 | |
their children are back searching for their Midlands roots. | 0:28:10 | 0:28:13 | |
We are on the road but the Black Country ambulances answering calls | 0:28:13 | 0:28:19 |