16/02/2016 EastEnders

I'm calling the police!

Is this what it's come to?

The sight of me sends you panicking to the cops?

I mean it, Gavin. I am not coming back to you!

Good.

I don't want you to.

KUSH GRUNTS

This was Stacey's chance! You ruined it!

I'm not listening to any more of your lies!

No lies.

I'm here simply to ask you to pass on a message to Sharon.

What for?

Ruining our holiday.

Holiday?

What are you talking about?

Oh, you don't know?

Me and Sharon have been spending time together,

making up for all those lost years.

You can't even throw a decent punch, can you?

The one place, the one bed where Stacey could be with Arthur...

-Do you realise what you've done?

-Course I do.

-What it means?

Of course I do!

Do you think I want to see him suffering?

You've ruined everything!

Yeah, yeah, I know.

I know!

No... Sharon, she...

She doesn't want anything to do with you.

I'm her dad!

No. You're... You're just saying all this to mess with me.

Me, Sharon and Dennis, we went away together.

That boy's great - a real chip off the old block.

What?

You get to have a happy reunion with your kids,

but I don't get one with mine?

If you're so close to Sharon,

why do you need me to talk to her for you?

We...

We had a bit of a disagreement.

What? She see through you, did she?

You know what I'm like, how I overstep the mark sometimes.

You could make her see I'm coming from a good place, that I mean well.

I'm not meant to be on my own.

I know there's no going back for us, no second chance. I accept that.

But I'm desperate.

Please - I need my girl just as much as you need your boys.

Yeah. He said he wants to be a great dad.

Aren't you the lucky one?

Plenty of girls get pregnant and the boy doesn't want to know.

Now, get home and use your charm.

Yeah, but what if it doesn't work?

I mean, this is all getting out of control.

I'm going to end up alone.

-Like me?

-No. I didn't mean that.

You're going to have a baby with the man you love -

there's nothing out of control about that.

I can't keep this up much longer.

Do as I say and you won't have to, will you?

Go on, off you pop.

And remember, tears and a troubled face aren't attractive.

I've got to get back, feed the hordes.

That's a nice blouse.

Is it new?

Yes, I got it on the...

I didn't mean anything, I...

It suits you.

It looks lovely on you.

It wouldn't...suit...

-Her?

-No.

Know what I thought of the other day?

Our first holiday with Lawrie. You remember, that old static caravan?

Looked forward to it for months

and then that flash flood nearly washed us away.

You clung on to me and I was...

terrified but didn't want to let on.

I knew you saw how frightened I was.

It meant the world to me you didn't say anything.

Did you manage to sort the brass band for Mr Sinclair's funeral?

I don't want to talk business.

And I don't want to talk about anything else.

It's no good you bringing up the past.

You made a mockery of all that when she came along.

We're not the same people, Les. Too much has happened.

Cumberland ring?

Ah...yeah, that would be me, thanks.

Enjoy.

You're wrong, you know.

We are the same people.

I won't deny we're more...battered.

Well, I am.

You're still as beautiful as ever.

But deep down, we're still the same couple of kids.

I suppose you're right.

I do love you so much.

Loving me isn't the issue.

Yes, it is. Loving you is everything.

And I feel stupid because it's taken all this to make me see that.

I'm lost without you, Pam.

Honest, I am.

It's like you've died.

No, it's worse than that, cos I see you every day,

and we make polite conversation.

I can't touch you.

I can't put my arm around you.

I ain't been able to watch any of our programmes.

Not without you sitting next to me, giving your running commentary.

I can't go on like this.

A second chance, please?

Eat your sausage before it gets cold.

You should have hit me a lot harder.

I deserved it after everything I've done.

What is that supposed to mean?

I mean, you've been acting weird the last couple of weeks.

I know it's hard, you know, Shabs leaving you...

It's not just that.

So what... What is it, then?

What? Go on.

I'm...

I'm just not a good mate.

I gotta go.

Well, what...?

You took your time!

How about, "Thanks, Lee, I really appreciate it"?

What's it for, anyway?

A surprise for Sonia - it's a belated Valentine's.

Oh, so you forgot, did you?

No! No, I didn't.

You did.

She had to work. Stop it.

Oh, you stink!

Charming! Nice to see you and all!

-Well, go and get changed!

-All right.

It's not like you'll have to put up with it for it for long.

I'm going to be at the Rat soon. That way I'll stink of booze, just like you.

I quite like the smell of fish.

I'm sorry.

I shouldn't have come.

I need to go home.

Stay...please?

I can't sit here pretending everything's normal.

I want to be able to say to you, "It's all right,

"go and fetch your stuff and I'll switch the electric blanket on,"

but...I've got this mental block.

I look at you and...

I look at you and I see her.

There must be something I can do.

My dad...

My dad said he couldn't shake off the things

that he saw fighting in Korea.

Growing up, I never could understand it.

Well, that's hardly the same thing!

I'm not saying it is.

What I am saying is, now I can understand it.

I can't get the image of you as her out of my head.

I want to, more than anything else in the world...

..but I don't know if I'm ever going to be able to...

Try.

Please.

We've got to.

We need to save our marriage.

I know you want to just as much as me.

You do, don't you?

Yeah. I just don't see how...

We've been through bad times before -

terrible times.

We got through it.

Lawrie's death...

You got through it by turning yourself into her,

not by pulling together with me.

No.

No, I can't do this. I can't!

I can't go on without you, Birdie, I can't!

I've told you - I'm not your Birdie any more.

HE EXHALES

You always did make the perfect cuppa.

Look, Gavin, you've got to go. Ian's going to be back soon.

And where have you been since Halloween?

Here and there, keeping my head down.

You know how it is.

Yeah...

how it always is with you.

It's true what they say -

everything happens for a reason.

Who knows what might have happened if we'd never left this place?

We both know what Walford does to the soul.

Sharon needs me in her life.

I'm not asking you to get involved.

Just ask her to call me.

-KNOCK ON DOOR

-Are you there, Kath? It's Dot.

Go upstairs!

You should keep this door locked when you're on your own.

I thought I'd come around, keep you company,

have a game of cards. Oh...

..you've already got company.

Cards -

fantastic idea.

How about a game of Chase The Lady?

HE CHUCKLES

I know something's going on between you and Abi.

What would that be?

Here we go, fresh as a daisy.

Oh, Lee, be a love. There's a couple of plates, just by the door there -

-I couldn't manage.

-Yeah, no worries.

If you don't want Lee finding out you kissed his dad,

I'd suggest you keep your nose out of my business.

-These finished with?

-Yeah.

Pam wasn't feeling very well.

Oh, right. That's why she ran off and left you on your tod, is it?

-She's highly strung, isn't she?

-Pam?

-Not at all.

-She's got to be.

That relentless cheerful persona's

got to be masking something wound pretty tight.

She's always been a ray of sunshine - it glows from inside her.

Maybe it's you...

..bringing out the best of her.

She's a lucky lady.

I've always admired your sombre steeliness.

It's very commanding.

Remove your hand.

Don't play the innocent with me.

Everyone knows she's thrown you out for cheating.

Why not broaden your horizons?

I don't...

I only want Pam.

Then you're going to be a very lonely man

-for the rest of your life.

-Oh, maybe I will.

Maybe I will be lonely...

..but I'll have known real love.

Something I doubt you've ever experienced.

Been a while since I shuffled a deck.

These cards have done the rounds, haven't they?

I've had them for years and years.

Lovely feel to them,

apart from this one.

Get hungry during a round of whist, did you?

That was my friend's dog, her little Willie.

Lou, she didn't half kick up a fuss

cos Ethel used to have Willie on her lap

and Lou swore blind

that he was pointing out the cards she should play.

-THEY LAUGH

-Would that be Ethel Skinner?

Yes.

How do you know?

Well, don't you recognise me?

-No.

-Well, it's been 50 years.

Ivy Sullivan's lad, Gavin.

We used to live above Mrs Skinner at number one.

Is this your husband?

Here he is!

Just popping out to get a curry for Honey.

-How did it go with Pam?

-Oh, yeah, yeah, very good...

See, I knew it!

All you had to do was sit down, put all that past behind you

-and rekindle the magic.

-Yeah, and I should thank you.

We both should.

Where is she, then?

Well, she went home.

We're taking things slowly, yeah.

But progress has been made - big strides.

Made up for you, mate. I really am.

I mean, that's what it's all about really, ain't it?

Having someone to cuddle up with in front of the telly,

-dipping your chips in their korma.

-THEY LAUGH

Hey, Les, Billy Mitchell - relationship counselling.

I should go into business.

Yeah.

SIREN WAILS

Did he force his way in?

Has he threatened you?

Have I?

No, Dot.

He wants me to talk to Sharon for him.

Well, I hope you said no.

You surprise me, Mrs Cotton.

Mrs Branning.

Mrs Branning.

I always thought you were a God-fearing woman.

I thought you'd approve of estranged families reuniting.

Yes, that's all very well, but you abandoned Sharon.

True...

and it breaks my heart...

..but, er, we've found each other again

and I want to make amends.

I'm not proud of the man I was...

..or of the man I've become...

..but I'd like to be proud of the man I'm going to be.

Pick up your cards.

You checking Bex's profile again?

No, I'm not.

Ain't BBC Three a bit young for you?

Oh wait, no, don't tell me -

Bex said she was watching something.

Yes, so I thought I'd have a look at it

so we've got something to talk about.

Is dinner ready? I'm starving.

Yes, but I forgot to get a bottle of wine.

-Can you go and get one?

-We don't have to drink tonight, do we?

Well...

yeah...

No, but...it will relax us, won't it?

Oh, so now you need to have a drink to relax with me?

No, of course I don't.

-All right,

-I

-want a bottle of wine, all right?

And I'm making something really special, so...

Cos I love you.

Red or white?

Whatever.

Charming.

SIREN WAILS

CROWS CAW

GAVIN CHUCKLES

Another hand for me.

I do remember you -

you was a proper little tearaway.

Ethel said that your mother, Ivy Sullivan,

she had men round at all hours.

It was like King's Cross Station, she said.

Are you holding me to account for the sins of my old girl?

No, but I'm holding you to account

-for forcing Kathy to abandon her sons...

-I didn't force.

I mean, it's easy to run away,

but it's harder to stay put and face the music.

If I'd faced the people I owed money to, I wouldn't be here today.

Neither would Kathy and Ben.

There's some very nasty people out there, Mrs Branning.

Yes, and there are some nice people too, and Sharon is one of them,

and she needs protecting from someone like you.

-I hope you're not falling for this, Kath.

-No, Dot. I'm not.

All right...

I get it - I'm not welcome here.

-I'm going.

-Good.

But Kathy, you've got to promise me you'll talk to Sharon.

She don't have to promise you nothing.

I'm talking to my wife.

Look, it's all right, Dot.

I don't need reminding of what he's put me through.

And I'm sorry, Gavin, but Dot's right.

Sharon is better off without you.

Like the daughter you gave away at birth was better off without you?

Donna?

Kathy didn't go interfering with her life -

it was Donna who came looking for her mother.

Weren't it, Kath?

I need my daughter.

You've left me with nothing, Kathy!

You had your chance with Sharon and you blew it.

If you want another one, I suggest you go across the Square

and you talk to her yourself.

But that's too simple for you, isn't it, Gavin?

You have to spread your web,

get other people to do your dirty work for you.

Well, it's not going to be me any more.

You get out of my life and stay out!

You're nothing to me!

Oh, you came!

Well, you said it was urgent.

What are you doing here?

Waiting for you...

..so we can kill Christine.

It's what she used to say.

"You're nothing to me."

Fag hanging out of her mouth...

..dressing gown falling open...

gin on her breath.

Have you any idea what it's like to grow up being told...

you should never have been born?

Pushed out the door the minute you wake up.

If it wasn't for Mrs Skinner, I'd have starved.

Yes, well, I'm sorry you wasn't loved

but everybody has got a sob story

and that ain't no excuse for nothing.

You never speak about your mum.

It's this place.

This Square brings it all back.

You think you've escaped the past but...

It's too late for us...

..but I still stand a chance with Sharon.

Don't listen to him.

Ethel used to give him the food off her plate

and he'd stick his grubby little fingers in her purse.

Is that how you see me too?

After all we've been through?

I don't know...

Look, Dot, I appreciate you standing up for me

but I can fight my own battles.

And this... This isn't even my battle any more, it's Sharon's.

But I mean it, Gavin,

there is no "you and me" any more,

-there is no going back.

-So you keep saying!

Well, maybe you're right.

Maybe Sharon doesn't need me...

..but what about Dennis?

He needs a father figure

and I need him.

He's my grandchild.

I'm sorry.

I can't listen to no more of this.

I'm going.

Don't let him ruin Sharon's life...

like he's ruined yours.

You can drop my cards around when you're passing.

You've never liked being on your own.

All right.

All right, I'll talk to her.

I want to show you you're more important to me than Christine.

-You don't need to do this.

-Yes, I do.

-I don't need gestures.

Oh, is that what you think this is?

The thought of doing this is killing me inside!

You've got to know that.

I know it is...

but it's some clothes and a wig!

You can replace them.

You think this is an empty gesture?

You said!

YOU said she's part of YOU.

Burn all this,

she'll still be in you.

I appreciate what you're doing

but it's deeper than this, Les.

We both know that.

These aren't just clothes, they...

They liberated me, they allowed me to be her.

All right, yes, it's symbolic,

it might seem superficial, but these...

were so important to me.

To her.

I can't go on like this.

Christine dies tonight.

And what happens the next time you need a release?

When everything gets on top of you?

I'll turn to you, I'll open myself up to you...

I just need you to be there. Say you'll be there, Pam.

Claudette took these last year in the hotel, in Gran Canaria -

another reminder of how I lied to you.

I...

I don't know if this is going to change the way I feel.

You realise that, don't you?

How can things go back the way they were?

I don't want to go back, I want to go forward...

with you. You and Paul. No-one else.

But she's inside you.

I can be strong!

Help me to be strong, Pam.

I'll...try.

I'll try.

She was always another person.

People think it's a joke, a perversion.

I've spent ten years of my life with her.

I'm spending a lifetime with you.

I love you.

SHE SOBS

You need to keep being as positive

as you've always been, all right?

I've got some iodine in here, sort that lip out.

Are you hungry? Tina's cooking.

-I don't want to interrupt your evening.

-You won't. Don't be silly.

-Oh!

-What is he doing here?

Wow.

I had no idea!

Does she do that a lot?

-I don't even like prawns!

-Oh, don't.

I can't believe I've just seen that.

So I... I probably better leave you two to it, really, ain't I?

Listen, don't worry about Stacey too much.

I'm sure you'll get a bed before the review.

And stop fighting with your mates - you're going to need them.

He just said that...

I was right to hit him, you know?

That...

That he was a bad mate.

Well, he's right - he shouldn't have taken your phone.

It was more than that.

-It was something else.

-What?

I don't know.

Well, I'll talk to him. See if I can get to the bottom of it, eh?

You can have a go.

Thank you.

We take it one day at a time.

-Yeah.

-Complete honesty.

I swear.

Right.

Well...

you can walk me home.

Like I did the first night we met?

Have a good laugh, did you?

-I'm sorry.

-No, you're not!

You volunteered to work Valentine's

and then you knew I was doing something special

and you go and invite Martin back!

-I didn't invite him. He was upset.

-Yeah, well, I'm upset!

But you don't stop to think about that, do you?

Well, well...

It's always the quiet ones.

Look, I'll talk to Sharon,

but if she doesn't want anything to do with you,

I am not going to push it.

Thank you.

I miss you.

Just get out, Gavin!

Oh, my gloves.

Look after yourself.