03/05/2016 EastEnders

My mum rates each day,

so one is a stay-in-bed day and ten is amazing.

SHE LAUGHS

I've started to do that. It helps.

And what's today's rating?

Six - which is good.

-Morning!

-Happy birthday.

-Morning.

Happy birthday to us!

Here, look at this.

I hid your present where the iron is, cos you never go in there, do you?

Happy birthday.

-What?

-Nothing.

We didn't think you wanted to make a big deal of your birthdays,

when you've got other stuff on your mind.

Having a lump checked out isn't going to stop me

from blowing out candles and opening presents, is it?

It's our birthday today. We've got to celebrate.

Unless this is some sort of excuse because you haven't bought me anything!

I chose it. Ta-dah!

Oh, a bread maker!

So you can learn the process for when you apply for Bake Off next year.

Doubt I'll be ready for then.

I'll have to apply for the year after, or the one after that, eh?

THEY LAUGH

-Right, croissant?

-Ooh, chocolate one.

Can you pass me the butter?

Is it really going to take that long to get my replacement card?

Yes, but I can't get any cash out. I...

Yeah.

Really?

OK. All right, fine. Thank you.

I see you started taking Olanzapine in the unit. How are you finding it?

Yeah, all right. I feel much better.

I do get a bit anxious in the morning

but if I do my breathing, then it normally goes away.

Great. That sounds like the right dosage.

Yeah.

Home life? How's that?

My fiance - Martin - he's been working away

but my brother's staying with us and he's a great help.

And Martin's home today, so we're looking forward to that.

That's good. A calm, steady home life is exactly what you need.

Stacey?

Um, my...my brother's mum is coming to see us today.

And, well, he hasn't seen her for years.

So I don't really know how well that's going to go.

But he's her son, you know, just like me and Arthur,

so I'm sure everything will be fine.

They just need to sit down and talk.

Yeah, that's no problem at all.

What time do you want to have a meet?

All right, I'll see you later.

That was Mas. Wants to borrow some readies.

He's had his wallet charred.

By that woman he was showing off in the Vic?

-He didn't really go into it.

-Cream horn or a sticky bun?

I might swerve the horn.

You know how much I love a sticky bun.

-SHE GIGGLES

-Two sticky buns, please.

You're wondering if she stayed the night, aren't you?

-Who?

-Who?! Masood's bit.

Oh.

None of my business if she stayed or not.

Good. I'm glad to hear it, after the way he treated you.

He's apologised.

By the looks of last night, he's moved on, so that's it, innit?

-GIGGLING

-Oh, stop it!

-What's the matter with you?!

-Sorry!

Don't apologise. Come on, let's go.

SHE GIGGLES

You still like him, don't you? I can tell.

So what if I do?

Got to get on with my life, haven't I?

I'll see you later.

I really love it.

You don't think it's too grown up?

I have to grow up sometime, don't I?

Hey, stop that now!

I don't deserve it, after what I did.

I've told you, I'm putting it behind me.

For me to do that, you need to stop bringing it up. OK?

I can't believe you have to go to work today.

The world doesn't ground to a halt

because I've got a doctor's appointment.

You'll be there, won't you?

Course I will. Listen, Bex ain't here.

You can drop the act.

No, I can't. Because, um, if I do, I'll fall to pieces.

So...see you later.

-Have I missed Martin?

-Not yet.

-Oh.

Andy's in the bathroom.

He said you said he could use the shower.

Oh, yeah. His boiler's playing up.

He looked disappointed you were out.

Oh, will you stop it?! He's a decent bloke, he really is.

-You two are all right now, aren't you?

-Suppose.

-How was your time at the psychiatrist?

-Hmm. Not great.

It's not the same as when I was in the unit.

He doesn't really answer my questions -

he just cares about my medication.

I, um, told him that your mum was coming.

-It'll be all right.

-I've not seen her in five years.

I've never seen her as Kyle.

Last thing she said to me was, "What did I do to deserve this?"

She's coming a long way, so it shows she's making an effort.

She does hate leaving the B&B.

Thinks the place will crumble without her.

I can't believe she's coming. I NEVER thought she would.

You're right. She must want to see me, mustn't she?

Yeah. Course.

Do you really think it's going to be all right?

Yeah, I do. It's like I told you, you are who you are.

-She HAS to see how strong you've been, how strong you are.

-Yeah.

She's never seen me strong.

COMPUTER ALERT

-Hello!

-'Morning.'

-Hang on. Hang on.

Who's that? Who's that? Look!

-Ooh! Say hello.

-'Hello, little man!'

-Aw!

-I'll leave you to it.

-Oh, you don't have to go.

Oh. He's nervous cos his mum's coming today.

-'I didn't think they got on.'

-They don't, but he said he missed her. So I invited her.

-'Stace.'

They're not going to make up if they don't speak to each other, are they?

He needs to face her.

Don't mind me - just getting my bag.

-'What is he doing with no clothes on?'

-He had a shower. His boiler's broke.

Hello, Martin. How's it going? Stacey came to the rescue.

I was a bit ripe.

I'll just grab my stuff and get going. All right? Cheers, mate.

See ya. What time's your train?

'Hour or so. I'll set off in a bit.'

I can't wait to see you.

'Stacey, you sure it's a good idea meeting this woman?

'She's your dad's other wife.'

Well, it's not just Kyle who has to face up to things, is it?

Martin, I can't shy away from stuff. I can do this.

'I know you can.'

Sure that's all you need?

Er, yeah. Thanks for this - I really appreciate it.

I'll get it back to you soon as I can.

I've just got to pick up Kamil from Heathrow Airport.

-I'll run you down there, if you want.

-Er, what about this place?

-Won't take too long.

-No, thanks. I'll be fine.

So, um, how was your wallet nicked? Did you get mugged?

Um, no, I just, er, it was my fault, really.

I dropped it on the floor and I didn't notice till later.

-Oh.

-Oh, by the way - I'm loving the Lil Wayne look.

The Lil...what?

The bins. All you need now is a few diamond teeth.

SHE GIGGLES

Oh, oh - here she is. L, L - get her a chair. You all right without your Zimmer?

-Shut up!

-Thanks for the money.

-See you later, old man.

LINDA GIGGLES

-Happy birthday.

-Thank you.

-Remember, you're only as old as the woman you feel.

Which would be ten years younger, wouldn't it?

I'm talking about Sonia. Obviously. Not that other bird...

All right, Mick, you can stop digging now. How is Sonia?

Oh, yeah, we're going to see the GP later.

Is that today?

I'm sure everything'll be fine. My mum had a dodgy mole once.

Turned out to be a chocolate raisin.

-Yeah...!

-THEY LAUGH

-Is that a joke?

-Yeah, joke.

-I think she's trying to...just stay positive, yeah?

Anyway, has she properly forgiven you yet?

Well, she says she has.

And are you sure you really want to be with her?

Well, I love her.

I hate myself for cheating on her.

I... I'm sure we're meant to be together.

I just don't know if we've got a future any more.

Come here. Happy birthday, all right?

-Stop stressing.

-Open it now.

-Open it up.

Kyle? Where are you? Soon as you get this message, come home. Your mum's going to be here

any minute and you can't leave me with her on my own.

I know you're nervous but you can't hide away.

BUZZER

BUZZER

Hello?

Oh, hi. Yeah. Um, yeah.

Come up to the top floor. It's flat C.

BUZZER

Oh, God.

KNOCK ON DOOR

You look just like Brian.

Come in.

Is anybody else here?

You mean Kyle?

Er, yeah...he's not home yet.

It's just down that way.

Please, er, sit down.

I haven't been to London for years.

D'you, um, d'you want a cup of tea or coffee?

A tea?

English Breakfast, if you've got it.

-Oh, I don't think...

-Well, whatever you have, then.

So...

The elephant in the room.

You're Brian's other daughter.

I have to say, I was...very surprised to hear from you.

I've wondered about you and Sean for years.

I never knew about you when I met him.

I thought he was single. I had no idea he had a wife and kids.

I'm...I'm not that sort of woman.

No. Course you're not.

It wasn't till...

Well, it wasn't till after he died - well, when I found out he'd died,

which was four months after the event.

Listen to me!

30 seconds through the door and out it all comes.

I told myself - hold back.

Well, it's not easy, is it? For both of us.

Did you know about me and my girls?

No. No, not until a couple of months ago.

Look, I know it's odd

but it's no-one's fault other than my dad's.

So there's no reason why we can't be...

What, be friends?

Well, I was going to say civil... just for Kyle's sake.

He misses you.

Lily?

-What, you have a daughter?

-Yeah. Yeah, and a son, Arthur.

So Brian would be a grandad now.

You'll know what it's like, when you're away from your children.

Five years.

It's a long time.

Well, that's what I said to Kyle.

It's a long way for you to come. You must want to see him.

I came to see Sarah. I came to see my daughter.

When you called, I had hoped...

-DOOR SHUTS

-Kyle!

Kyle, your mum's here.

Mum.

Sonia Fowler.

How's Siobhan and Shannon?

Good.

Did Shannon get her degree?

A 2:1.

Getting married in August.

Do you remember Jason, her fiance? He's living with us now.

Be nice to have a man about the house after all these years.

-Is that meant to hurt him?

-I didn't mean it...

You look nothing like Sarah.

I just wasn't expecting...

I have three daughters.

Does he look like a girl to you?

I don't know what she looks like.

He. I'm a he.

What have you done to yourself? You were so beautiful.

I didn't feel beautiful.

I felt wrong.

I don't feel wrong any more.

You say that!

How is that meant to make me feel? Eh?

I gave birth to a daughter.

I didn't treat Siobhan and Shannon any differently.

What was wrong with you? It wasn't my fault.

It wasn't anyone's fault.

I was born with the wrong body.

And now you want to change it and I'm supposed to accept that?

Well, you could try.

Why should I?

It was bad enough when you announced that you were a lesbian

and I was meant to be OK with that

and don't say I didn't try, because you KNOW I did!

And just when I managed to get my head around that,

now you're NOT a lesbian.

Then you come to me and say you want to be a boy

and you want to have your breasts removed. Well, I'm sorry,

but that is just NOT NORMAL.

Why are you here if all you're going to do is have a go at him?

Don't you want to know how he is? Or what he's been up to?

Cos he's a chef. He is a really good chef with a job in a restaurant

and do you know what? He is brilliant with my kids.

He's lovely and he is gentle...

Oi, no! No, don't walk away. Talk to him, talk to him, get to know him.

Look, I know this must be hard for you but it's hard for him, an' all.

Do you really think that he would go through all of this if he had a choice?

You don't know anything about me.

You don't know how it felt to find out that my whole marriage was a lie.

To find out that your father was a bigamist.

Look, I am really, really sorry for what my dad did. It's unforgivable.

But you can't take that out on him.

You can lower your arm now and put your top back on.

Did you feel it?

Yes. Just the one on your left breast, near your underarm.

-What, so there's nothing on the other side?

-No.

And the lump's quite small, isn't it?

That's got to be a good sign.

You did the right thing, coming to see me.

I'm going to refer you.

-But what do you think it is?

-I don't know.

I'm sorry, I know that's not what you want to hear.

It's very difficult to tell an innocent lump from a more serious one without further tests.

Sarah was never like the others.

She always pushed me away, even when she was little.

I never understood what I did wrong.

You didn't do anything wrong.

I was struggling with who I was.

No-one's expecting you to be OK with it overnight,

but now you've met him, you can build on it, can't you?

No.

I'm sorry but I can't.

I wish I could, but...

..I just can't find it in myself.

I hope you have a happy life, I really do.

But you're not my Sarah.

If it means anything... I'm glad you're not on your own.

HE SOBS

Why did you have to ring her?

Why did you have to put me through that?

I was just trying to help.

I told you! I said she'd never accept me!

You know what?

I used to have hope that maybe she'd...

..but you've taken that away from me.

-I wasn't allowed in the cockpit.

-You weren't allowed in the cockpit?

You should have told them you want to be a pilot.

I don't any more. I want to be a lawyer.

-A lawyer?

-Like my other dad.

Lawyer? You've got to be joking.

Listen, I'd rather have your dad's job any day. A postman?

You finish at ten, watch telly all day.

Know what I mean? Cushty mushty!

Mas, if you need to borrow more readies, you let me know. Give me a shout.

Hello, Kamil. You're back. Did you have a good time?

Amazing!

My other dad rode in on a horse.

Yeah, er, well...he's not your dad.

Mum said I have to call him Dad.

Well, I'm your dad and I'm saying you don't have to. OK?

Er, did somebody hit you?

-What happened?

-Nothing.

Come on. Come on, let's go.

SHE SOBS

I've got to go to the caff. I said I'd do a few hours.

-You going to be OK?

-Yeah, I'll be fine.

-Come here.

I just need to phone Rebecca. She'll be worried.

I, er, I don't want you to think I'm prying.

Yeah? But you are.

I'm sorry. I'm just...

Last night's date.

It was a scam.

She had a guy waiting for me. They mugged me.

Took my wallet.

Oh, Mas, that's terrible!

What I deserve. Stupid for thinking she liked me.

I'm a...I'm a fool!

Such an old fool!

Don't be daft. Why shouldn't she have liked you?

You're a very charming man.

Ha-ha! Am I?

HE SIGHS

I shouted at Kamil.

I haven't seen him for weeks and I snapped at him

as soon as we walked through the door.

-Where is he?

-He's upstairs.

-Please don't tell anyone.

-Of course I won't.

Don't be put off by what happened.

There's someone out there who's just right for you.

I'm not saying she's a 30-year-old beauty

-with legs up to her armpits, but...

-Mmm.

..you will find someone.

Go and give Kamil a hug.

And get some raw steak on that eye.

I'm sorry. I shouldn't have sprung her on you like that.

If I'd just had more time to prepare myself.

No, I reckon you'll get another chance. She's a mum.

She might say she's turning her back but she won't be able to.

-And she took your flowers, didn't she?

-I suppose.

Guess this is where I say, thanks for trying.

DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES

Kyle?

Where's me welcome-home banner, then?

Come on - you all right?

She's been, hasn't she? Kyle's mum? She upset you.

No. I was fine, once I'd stood up to her.

I just missed you. Don't go away again.

Yes, boss. But - here, hold these.

-Mmm, thanks.

-It was all worth it. Cher-ching!

Oh. It doesn't look like much.

Yeah, well, just, um... this is part of it, innit?

They're sending the rest on. Come here.

Mmm! I missed you. SHE LAUGHS

I would have come round earlier but I had to finish me shift

at the laundrette.

Happy birthday!

Many happy returns of the day.

Oh, Dot. Thank you.

-You shouldn't have.

-Oh, go on.

You don't have to open it now.

Did you get a card from your mother?

-Yeah.

-Ah.

-She's in Germany.

Oh. Still trying to find herself, is she?

I tried that once. Found myself in the laundrette!

THEY LAUGH

-I miss her.

-Yeah, course you do.

Still, I suppose she needs to spread her wings,

after all what she's been through.

I just wish she was...here.

Yeah, course you do.

I might have cancer.

What?

I found a lump.

And I've just come back from the doctor's.

And they're going to do more tests.

Oh, Sonia! But you're so young!

It's that gene, innit?

First Mum, now me.

I'm 31, Dot. I'm 31.

I keep saying to Tina and Rebecca that it's going to be a false alarm.

You know? Because I don't want Rebecca to be upset.

Because I know how that feels, don't I?

But I don't think I'm as strong as Mum.

Oh, yes, you are. You are the strongest girl I know.

I'm not, Dot! Sorry.

I've been holding it in all day.

Oh, go on. Go on, let it out.

Cry all your tears.

SHE SOBS

I'm scared.

I'm scared Tina won't like me any more because I won't have any boobs.

Oh, course she will!

If she loves you, she'll love you whatever happens.

But you don't want to think about that. You've got to fight this.

You've got to be strong, you've got to fight this with all your might.

All right?

All right.

More chocolates? Date went well, then.

Get the shiner from some sort of mad sex game?

The chocolates are for Carmel.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah. She's been a good friend and I haven't.

They're to say sorry.

Yes - and you should say sorry.

-Now's your chance.

-Hi, Masood.

-Denise, you'll never guess what's happened.

-What?

Shaki just called.

It's top secret but he heard Umar talking

and he wants us to get back together.

Apparently, he feels he made the biggest mistake of his life letting me go.

-Oh, that's great!

-Yeah!

I'll catch you later. I'm late for Bikram but I had to tell you.

Bye, Masood.

Bye.

Don't suppose you'll be wanting to buy these now then, will you?

No.

I must have left my wallet in here when I was...

When you were what? Parading around half-naked in front of my fiancee?

Jealous?

No. But just shower somewhere else in future.

-Oh, here it is.

-Hey.

Oh! Someone's been splashing out.

Yeah, well...

I suppose I should thank you for getting me the job.

-Went well, did it?

-Yeah, great, yeah. You know. I've got more money coming. It's good.

That's funny, cos I spoke to my mate earlier

and he said he had to fire you...

..which makes me wonder where you're getting all this money from.

You wouldn't be lying to your missus, by any chance, would you?

Aw! Sweet.

She means a lot to me.

When I was little, her and my grandad really helped me.

Well, we should have her over for dinner one night.

You'd hate that.

Yeah. But you'd like it and that's what's important.

I'm sorry your birthday hasn't been that great.

It's just another day.

Listen, you're going to have these tests and it's going to be fine.

-I know.

-You know?

Yes. You have NOT got cancer.

Dot said I need to be strong and fight it.

Well, she's a wise old bird.

And she's right. I need to be strong.

Hopefully it is nothing.

But whether it's benign, or cancer,

I'm going to have a double mastectomy.

You serious?

What is the point of spending my life worrying about it?

I've got the gene, so I'm going to do something about it.

And you said you'll be with me, no matter what.

Yeah, of course.

Well, they're coming off.