28/07/2016 EastEnders

What you gonna do with a gun?

What do you think I'm gonna do?

Are you gonna help me or not?

I ain't getting you a gun.

I'll get it myself then.

So what you gonna do?

Pop in the Minute Mart, pick one up(?)

I'm doing this

with or without your help.

It's got nothing to do with you, all right?

Jay, you're selling drugs - of course it's got something to do with me!

Where you getting 'em?

Oi! I said, where are you getting 'em!

Look, just leave me alone.

Who are you selling 'em for?

I tell you something, Jay, this has got to stop right now

-because this is not the way we brought you up...

-Brought me up?

YOU never brought me up. Who brought me up?

No-one. I've tried doing the right thing, it doesn't work.

I ain't gonna see you end up in some gutter.

THIS is what's keeping me out of the gutter.

How do you think I've been able to pay you my rent all these weeks, eh?

Hang on a minute.

Are you saying that you've had drugs in my house?

Well, where do you think all the money's been coming from?

You've been dealing drugs while you're living under my roof?

What if my kids found 'em?!

I've got no choice.

Course you got a choice!

-You need more money, you ask Dessie for more hours.

-He can't.

And even if he did, as soon as he gets wind of the fact

I'm a nonce, he ain't gonna want to know me.

He'd probably prefer I was a drug dealer.

-That ain't true.

-Course it is!

You know, the only people who genuinely don't care what I've done

are the people who are buying these.

What you doing going through my stuff?

I thought I'd look at your "Dad To Be" book, see where I was going wrong.

-It's nothing to do with you.

-I thought you was made up about having this baby.

This is between me and Whitney. No-one else.

It's true.

So you've spoke to her about it, then?

Not yet, no.

So you really think you can cook the girl a chilli,

ask her if she fancies having an abortion,

and everything'll be sweet, yeah?

Right. Here's what you're gonna do.

You're gonna to go upstairs and put your uniform on, and go to Beavers.

All right? Your mum's not here now, Richard.

And I ain't putting up with you mooching around the house all day.

We're going, whether you like it or not,

even if I have to take you kicking and screaming.

Leave me alone!

HE SIGHS

Getting a gun not as easy as you thought?

You're the one who's always said

to stand up for myself.

Fight my own battles.

If it had been Sharon, you'd be straight round there.

Ain't me we're talking about though, is it?

You saying I ain't up to it?

-No, I never said that.

-That's what you meant though, isn't it?

Why don't we just let the Old Bill do what they gotta do?

The Old Bill? You've changed your tune, Dad.

Or is it that you just don't care?

Course I care.

I have tried to do this the right way.

You know...

..all these years, Dad,

I haven't asked you for nothing.

I haven't asked one favour. And you haven't given me none.

But I'm asking you now.

I really, really need your help.

This is the one and only time.

Please.

Or else, I'm just going to go out

and take my chances asking around. Yeah?

(Fine.)

Wait...

I'll make the call.

Oh, I can't believe I forgot kidney beans.

Do you need to see someone again?

-No, no. There's nothing the matter with me.

-Really?

Well, then, start using your nut,

because if you even MENTION something like this to her,

you could destroy your relationship whether you have a baby or not.

-What would you rather I do? Lie to her?

-No. No. I just...

I don't want to see you make a big mistake.

-The mistake'll be me having a kid when I ain't ready.

-How do you know?

Sometimes you don't get to choose how you work things out.

Yeah, well, sometimes you do.

Look, I know I weren't exactly planned, all right,

and you were young and all that, but that's different, you and Mum

have been solid from day one. Yous knew what yous wanted.

Not always.

What?

What, you don't think, um...

anything like that ever crossed my mind? No?

Right, right. We can sort this.

Do you owe anyone for gear? Anyone you can't pay back?

Because if you don't, right, just chuck it away.

Flush it down the khazi, whatever.

I ain't chucking 'em.

Look, I ain't leaving here until you get rid of it.

I said that I would look out for you, Jay,

and that is exactly what I'm gonna do.

I know you just feel sorry for me cos you let my dad die.

-Done this before, ain't we, Jay?

-Yeah. Yeah, we have,

so why don't you get out, and let me make my own decisions?

Because I ain't gonna stand by and watch you throw your life away.

I ain't got a life!

I'm not saying

I would have got rid of you, I'm saying...

I thought about it.

Do you wish you had?

Of course not, you string. It was a thought.

I'm just saying to you that,

you know, I was flapping when I found out your mum was up the spout.

Now, listen to me.

You gotta swear that you will never tell her.

Of course not.

Can you imagine

what she would have thought of me if I'd have even mentioned it?

Least you had future prospects.

Are you mad?

I was a baby, I was 15 years old.

You know? But we did all right. I'm...

Why do you think I'm so keen on changing your mind?

You got way more prospects than I ever did.

-Honestly, Dad, what have I got to offer a kid?

-Everything.

-Like what?

Well, y-you're named after Lee Majors.

I mean, you're the Bionic Man, you're a survivor. You know?

You can put your hand to anything, I've seen you do it.

-You'll be all right, you'll manage.

-Aghh! Stop telling me I'll manage!

That's all everyone ever says - that I'll manage and be fine.

-What if I ain't?

-Listen to me...

-No.

Everything's gonna be twice as hard with a little kid running around.

I can hardly keep my head above water as it is.

I mean, what if my depression gets worse? And everything goes to pot?

I do not wanna have to look after a kid

when I can hardly look after myself.

Let go of the door.

Richard! Just let go of the door.

I hate this place,

I hate this country and I hate you!

Right, open this door now.

Right, listen, I'm gonna count to three,

and you better get out of there.

One...

..two...

I mean it, Richard. I ain't putting up with this.

You need to get out there and do something.

Three!

Come on.

All right, you know what, you stay there.

I can wait.

HE SIGHS

It ain't gonna get here any quicker

with you standing there gawping out the window, is it?

Made you a cup of tea here.

So. What's the plan, then?

Go round this geezer's house,

knock on the door...

Then what?

What if he don't answer it?

I'll kick it in.

What if his missus answers it, or... or one of his kids?

What?

Well, you don't know anything about this geezer, do ya?

I know what he did.

And what if he answers the door with a sawn-off shotgun in his hand

or just sticks it through the letterbox and blows you away?

Eh?

You recognised HIM - don't you think he's going to recognise you?

And what about his pals? What do you think they're going to do?

I'll kill 'em all if I have to.

Come on, Ben.

You're not a mass murderer, are ya?

I've killed before.

This ain't the same.

Your last probation meeting's next month, innit?

You think I care about that?

Well, you should do.

You got your whole future in front of ya.

Future...!

The future that I had,

that I wanted, is lying dead in the morgue.

What, and you think Paul would want you to do this, do ya?

How do you know what Paul wanted?

You...barely even knew him, you hated him.

I never hated him.

You hated everything he stood for from the moment you met him.

Don't try and deny it.

You hated us being together. You're just as bad as them!

Who?

No-one.

Just as bad as who?

No-one!

It wasn't random. All right? It...

They attacked us because...

..because we're gay.

That...

that is why Paul died.

I knew it.

You going to tell me how he deserved it now?

Of course I ain't.

Why didn't you tell me this before?

What difference would it have made?

You told the Old Bill?

KNOCK AT DOOR

Wait... You stay there.

He ain't going to give it to you, is he?

No-one can predict the future.

Whether it's gonna be good, whether it's gonna be bad...

I mean, when IS the right time to have a kid?

What, when you got a nice house? You got a nice job?

Got a few quid wrapped round ya? I mean...what is it,

what are you waiting for? World peace, what? I mean...

whatever it is you're waiting for, there will always be something else.

And there WILL always be something else.

Now, I never had any of that.

But you got to ask yourself what I did.

Do you love this woman enough to want to have a baby with her?

Cos if the answer's yes...

..it's a no-brainer.

I mean...

you think this is easy?

I book meself a bit like a swan.

On the outside, and on the surface,

I'm calm.

But underneath I am paddling a hundred mile an hour.

I book you more of a...more of an ugly duckling.

-Do you want a clump, or...?

-LEE LAUGHS

Dad, I just don't wanna get it wrong, I don't wanna mess things up.

Look what happened to baby Ollie. I can't even look after my little brother.

-It was an accident.

-What if I ain't just dad material?

Mate, I got two dads, and not one of 'em

was worth a rub when I was growing up.

Listen. You're gonna be a blinding dad, trust me.

I'm just scared of getting it wrong.

That...That it's all just gonna be a disaster waiting to happen.

I mean, look at my track record.

Look at what I've put Whitney through already.

Credit to her she's stood by me,

but this time it ain't just gonna be her that I let down, is it?

HE SIGHS

I don't know what to do.

Trust me...

we're all making this up as we go along.

I've got the worst possible thing I can have on my record

and you think I'm worried about a drugs charge?

-Doesn't matter what it says on your record. You ain't...

-Ain't what?

Ain't what? What? A kiddie fiddler?

Because that's what they've got me down as for the next five years.

And it don't even stop there, does it, because once you're on that register,

that's it, your life's finished.

-It was a mistake.

-Yeah(!)

Everyone else don't see it like that, do they?

You know, I can't even go to the Job Centre now without people

staring, or whispering things behind my back.

That's why I don't bother going any more.

-How would THEY know?

-Everyone knows.

-You're being paranoid!

-I'm being realistic.

Look... Jay, look,

Why don't I try and talk to Phil, eh?

-See if we can find you something.

-It's a waste of time.

-You gotta try!

I'm fed up of trying.

I'm grateful that you've stuck by me, but believe it or not...

I actually cared about Linzi.

And who knows? Who knows, if this hadn't have happened,

maybe we'd have ended up great mates.

But it has.

So I've lost her, and Phil hates me

so all I've got left...

is these.

What are you doing?

You think these are the answer?

Well, let me tell you something - they ain't.

And I am speaking from experience here - these will destroy you.

Billy, give 'em back to me.

I have been where you are, Jay. You think this is a life saver.

I'm warning you, Billy.

I had no job, right,

I lived on a rubbish estate.

No future.

Had all that stuff that happened in the kids' home.

Well, this seems like easy money, don't it?

It's like any hole that you dig, Jay - it's easier to get into

than it is to get out of.

And eventually...

..eventually you'll start using.

Just like I did.

-Like YOU did?

-Yeah. Yeah, me.

And I ain't ever told anyone that, not even Honey.

So why you telling ME?

Because I know what it does to people

and I don't want that to happen to you.

Before I came to Walford I was all over the shop,

I didn't know what I was doing from one day to the next.

Scoring and selling, that's all that mattered to me,

it was more important

than looking after me own nephew Jamie.

Yeah, well, that's you, innit, I ain't you.

You think so?

Let me tell you something, Jay.

One day you are gonna wake up

and you're gonna hate yourself for what you're doing.

And what it does to other people, and when that happens,

you're going to need something to take your mind off it all.

And that something

will be sitting right there in your pocket.

Think about it!

RICHARD SOBS

-Richard...?

-Go away!

You all right, mate?

-Look, I erm...

-I want my mum.

Listen, why don't you just come out and I'll...

I said, go away.

Look, I'll tell you what.

I'm gonna go and sit on the couch.

And when you wanna come out and talk about it I'll be there.

Right? I promise you I won't shout any more.

Now, you know we'll support whatever decision you make.

Nobody said you have to do this on your own.

We're always gonna be here to help ya.

WATER BUBBLES

Oh... The rice!

Still think I can cope with a kid? I can't even cook a meal.

Ahh, listen, don't worry about it, just chuck another lot on.

Nah, I ain't got time. Whitney's working later.

-Well, just do something quick, whack some noodles on.

-Noodles? Nah,

give us a slice of bread, will ya?

What you talking about, a slice of bread?

Here's your bread...

Something I learned in the army - takes the smoke smell away from the rice.

I ain't saying nothing.

All right, I CAN cook. Just about.

No. You can sort out a problem.

And that...is being a parent.

-That is a strong bit of chilli!

-Nice?

-Ahh, do you know what?

Oh, it's beautiful.

DOOR OPENS

If you go through with this,

you know there's nothing me, Ritchie, or anyone can do to help you, don't ya?

I mean, think about it.

You got motive, you got form,

it ain't gonna take the Old Bill long to put two and two together.

I don't care about any of that.

Just because I do stupid things, don't mean you have to.

You ain't me.

Yeah, and that disgusts you, don't it?

No, it makes me wish that I'd stood up to MY old man, like...

like you stand up to me.

A few months ago you was...

you was ready to take over the business.

You made it clear that weren't gonna happen.

Well, maybe I got it wrong.

You what?

You're more than capable of running that business. You know it better than anyone else.

Me?

Look at the state of me.

I don't know if I'm gonna make it to Christmas.

Gran's gone,

Grant's a liability...

So?

So who else am I gonna leave it all to? Eh?

I need you to hold things together for me,

to look after Sharon and Dennis,

make sure Louise don't go off the rails.

But you can't do that if you're... banged up,

or six foot under, can ya?

I don't like Richard.

What?

Everyone calls me Ricky.

Oh... Course they do.

Ricky it is. I'll call you that from now on.

Look, I'm sorry I shouted at ya. And threw your game in the bin.

Guess it's gonna take a while for us to get to know each other.

So what do you like doing in Portugal?

Do you go out on your bike?

I haven't got a bike.

So what do you do with your mum?

Nothing. She's always busy.

-JACK SIGHS

-I see my friends sometimes.

Do you miss 'em?

Look, mate...

Ricky...

Beavers doesn't have to be a punishment.

You know, I thought you'd like it - you'd make some new friends...

What if they make fun of me?

Well, why would they make fun of ya?

Well, I'll make sure they don't.

It's gonna be great. You're gonna go on camp-outs, trips...

Get to earn all them badges. I mean, it'll be brilliant.

If you want to go so much, why don't YOU join?

All right, I will.

Says here Walford Beavers are currently looking for volunteers to help out.

-You?

-Why not?

I know my dyb dyb dybs from my dob dob dobs.

They don't say that any more.

Well, how do you know?

The internet.

Ah. Well, I guess we've all got something to learn then, ain't we?

Right, I'm going to take these,

and get rid of them, do us both a favour.

I can handle this, right?

What, you think I didn't think the same thing?

Look, I'm not a child. Yeah? And I definitely ain't your child

so if you wanna boss someone about, you got William and Janet for that.

Don't think you can do the same to me.

Jay, you gotta start listening to people who care about ya.

-You are not walking out that door with them.

-What, you threatening me now?

Don't think I won't, Bill.

I might go and tell Honey your little secret, eh, see what she's got to say.

Look at what it's doing to you already. JAY SIGHS

-Jay, this isn't you!

-Yeah, well, maybe it is.

Maybe you don't know me like you thought you did.

I don't need your help, I don't need your pity,

and I definitely don't need your advice, right?

You're nothing to me, Billy, so why should I listen to ya?

Is that what you really think?

Yeah.

OK.

Here ya are.

And you're right, Jay -

you are nothing to do with me.

You're just a lodger who pays his rent with drug money.

And I ain't happy with that.

So don't you bother ever coming back to my house again.

HE SIGHS

Neither of us are saints, Ben.

But we...we ain't cold-blooded killers either.

You and me...

we both know what it's like to be responsible for someone's death

and what that...does to ya.

I want...to give you the chance to start over again.

And show everyone what you could do with the business.

-What, now that Paul's gone?

-No. No. I...

I wanted you to take over before all this happened.

You want to give that scum the satisfaction

of taking all that away from you? Eh?

We had these done together.

Yeah, I know.

What?

Oh... I saw the other day, and...

..and Paul's.

Couldn't bring yourself to say anything?

What do you want me to say?

That you were happy for me?

That ain't me, Ben.

I'm not... I ain't good at that sort of stuff.

I've gotta do something, Dad.

I can't just let 'em get away with it.

I know... I know he meant a lot to ya.

And I ain't...

I ain't gonna pretend I found it easy you two being together, but...

..I know what it's like to...to love someone.

I want him back.

Ben, if you kill every person in London,

that ain't gonna happen, is it?

Then what can I do?

Dad, tell me...what I can do.

Because...

deep down I know you're right.

I ain't even got the guts to do this.

It ain't about that.

It's about knowing

that you shouldn't.

I want him back so much.

HE SNIFFS So much...

(Come here.)

HE SOBS

HE CHUCKLES APPROVINGLY

All right, Ricky... Let's show 'em how it's done.

You look very smart.

-Oh...

-Yes.

Sometimes you just...

..you just got to listen to other people.

Maybe if I'd have done that months ago

I wouldn't be in the state I'm in now.

Take a look if you want.

Brake parts. For that Mk IV.

I just had to make you see sense, and I...

I wanted you to see that I've learnt from my mistakes,

and so can you, Ben.

Because I'm not the same person I used to be.

And neither are you.

Is this...

..some kind of joke to you?

No, of course it ain't, I just...

I just don't want to see you do something stupid, that's all.

-You've been playing me?

-No.

So, hold on. Taking over the business - was that just a lie?

-No.

-To keep me here?

-No, Ben...

Can't believe I was stupid enough to think that you'd help me!

Well, I AM helping you. You're just too hot-headed to see it.

I ain't a kid!

Don't you ever

think you can tell me what to do again.

I don't need your help.

I will deal with this on my own!

Do you hear me? On my own!

BEN GRUNTS, DOOR SLAMS