Episode 4 Antiques Road Trip

It's the nation's favourite antiques experts, with £200 each...

I love that.

..a classic car

and a goal - to scour Britain for antiques.

Yipee!

It's a good job I like you.

The aim - to make the biggest profit at auction,

but it's no mean feat. There'll be worthy winners

and valiant losers.

Ah, I'm getting wet!

So, will it be the high road to glory or the slow road to disaster?

-How much did you make?

-About a couple of quid!

This is the Antiques Road Trip!

Yeah!

On this road trip, two auctioneers vie to be crowded King of the Fens.

Upbeat Thomas Plant holds court in a busy Berkshire saleroom

and is never less than cheerily charming.

-Here I am, on my knees.

-I know, lovely.

-Can I give you a kiss?

-Ooh!

Ooh! Whilst his arch rival, Philip Serrell,

runs a northern auction house with a quick wit that's matched

only by his sunny disposition.

Will you just shut up, Jack?

You don't sell aspirin, do you?

Some of the time. Both of our chums started this road trip with £200.

Now entering the fourth leg, Thomas Plant has managed to swell

his coffers to a modest £250.28.

Whilst Philip has amassed an even more parsimonious £220.62.

So, there's everything to play for

as they motor towards the next showdown.

Today, the lads are driving a sky blue beauty, the 1975 Triumph Stag.

-Is the car going all right?

-The car's lovely, isn't it?

It's lovely on these open roads.

This whole road trip takes our boys from Samlesbury

in Lancashire over to the sea to the Isle of Man, then south

to nautical Greenwich in London, a journey of almost 700 miles.

On this leg, they are in the exotic East, beginning in Stickney,

Lincolnshire, heading for their auction in Ely, Cambridgeshire.

Today they're journeying through the Fens, a lovely region of flat,

fertile farmland.

They are heading for the village of Stickney.

Or they would be - if they could find it.

Do you know if we're going the right way?

# I've got a brand-new combine harvester ...#

-Ah, they've spotted a local.

-Hello.

We're trying to get to...

-..Stickney.

-Yes.

-Where are we, are we here?

-Yes.

Thomas, have you got that...

You haven't got the right page, have you?

He has no faith in me!

-You're going to go up to the A16.

-Thank you very much. Take care.

-Have a good day. Bye-bye.

-Thank you.

-He said it was the A14. It's not the A14.

-I know where we are.

I'm losing confidence in you, you led me astray.

-Shut up.

-Left here?

-Left.

-You sure?

-Stickney, that's where we're going! WEARILY:

-Yes.

Eventually, they seem to have found their way.

They're heading into Clutterbugs Antiques.

Well, door-to-door service, Thomas, look at that.

-Where Alan will greet them.

-How are you?

-Nice to see you.

-Are we all right to park here?

-Wherever you like.

I'll go upstairs and you go downstairs.

So far, the lads' performance hasn't been uniformly winning.

On the last leg, Thomas made a paltry profit of £2.74,

and this less than stellar performance is weighing

on his mind this morning.

I've really got to have my head correct and buy good things

which they're going to want at general sales.

Further to this ambition,

Thomas has spotted something that might just be a winner.

-Where did you get these from?

-Somebody brought them in.

They're not Masonic, they're buffalos or...

They are a set of four medals

issued by the Royal Antediluvian Order of Buffaloes,

a social and philanthropic organisation

structured in fraternal lodges. Ticket price for all four is £80.

All different lodges have their own different medals.

Empire lodge number 100.

They're all to this one chap, Brother McCarthy.

For services rendered.

Now, can he get a handshake from Alan on the price?

What would you do for the four?

-What are they, £20 each?

-£20 each.

-80...

-Give us 60. Buy the lot, you get one free.

-Right, thank you.

-That's a good deal.

-Kind of, but I haven't finished shopping.

Haven't finished shopping.

He's browsing on.

And he seems to have all sorts of buffalo on the brain this morning.

-What do you know about that?

-Not a lot. What age would you say it was?

Early 20th. It's got a bit of wear to it.

Maybe late 19th.

It's quite nice, though, isn't it?

It's a type of buffalo paperweight cast in bronze.

On the ticket is £35.

Would you do that and the medals for 50?

-60. Come on. Shake your hand on 60.

-No, no, no...

-Yes!

-No. 50.

-60.

-50 and we've got a deal.

-The terms shirt and back spring to mind.

-Oh, come on, £50.

-You're a star.

-Just to get rid of you.

-What do you mean get rid of me?

-You're a star.

-Indeed he is!

Thomas' bullish haggling gets him the deal he wants.

-£50?

-And he's off and running.

-Thank you very much.

Philip, on the other hand, has decided to abandon this shop

and strike out on his own.

It's not like you to go off-piste, old boy.

Where are you going, Philip?

I might go buy a tractor. See you later on. All the best.

(He always does this.)

Philip's decided that, since he is in a rural area,

he'd like to see if any local farmers have items that they might

sell him. It's an unconventional approach.

Do bear with us. I've no idea where he is going.

There's an old farmhouse there that...

Hello?

Hello. I wonder if you can help me.

Agricultural bygones. Hello, doggy.

Where's the best place?

I wondered if you've got any old implements, any old fruit crates,

wooden ones, anything like that?

Well, in East Kirkby there's a shop that sells all sorts.

Excuse me, mate, which way is East Kirkby?

-That way, mate.

-Thank you.

Philip's driving to the village of East Kirkby, Lincolnshire.

Ah.

Oh, yeah, let's go and have a look in here.

And after all that drama, he ends up back in an antique shop. Ha!

Luckily, dealer Richard here at Craven Collectables is already a fan

-of the Road Trip.

-Watch the programme, first day have a dust.

And here you are, you turned up while I'm dusting.

I know, Richard. He's most inconsiderate.

Nice Chinese vase.

I think that Chinese is probably Japanese.

I'm going to have a quick whizz round here.

-The Goldfinger book, is that a first edition?

-The who?

Is it a first edition?

I think you'll find it is.

He has two so-called first editions of James Bond novels

but printed by the book club.

Goldfinger and You Only Live Twice. They're priced at £25 each.

The trouble is, they've got no dust covers.

-What I'm thinking is, everybody loves James Bond, don't they?

-Yeah.

And what else did Ian Fleming write?

-He wrote a children's book...

-Yeah, I can't think what it was called.

A voice will come over in a minute that'll tell us.

Chitty-Chitty-Bang-Bang. Do I have to do everything?!

I would guess these would be worth an awful lot of money

if they both had a dust cover and if this was in better condition.

So they would. First editions of these novels with original dust covers by the first printer

can sell for anything between 500 and £3,000.

But sadly, these are Book Society first editions,

and, as such, are worth vastly less.

Philip is still thinking about taking the books.

But he's browsing on with the irrepressible Richard.

-How much is the wine rack?

-20 quid to you.

-But I ain't going no lower on it.

-Oh, just behave.

This enormous wine rack was made by Wilbins,

a London manufacturer.

I sell them, half that size, for more money than that.

These are no good, big ones, because you can't get them in the house.

-You cut them in half.

-Don't be so silly.

Look at that. And you've even got makers of London.

What more could you ask for?

-I can feel myself getting kippered by you here.

-No, no, no, not at all.

-Hmm. I think you might've met your match, Phil.

-I've sold you two books

but we ain't agreed on a price yet, how about a lovely milk crate?

-Look at that.

-Do you ever stop to draw breath?

-Manners, Philip.

-What's that box there?

-This? Bread trays.

The old bread trays. And here's a bit of social history.

This is social history.

They're wooden bread trays, stamped with the name

of a local baker, Glenton & Myers.

Philip's thinking that he could combine them into a job lot

with the wine rack, if he could get a word in.

-Bit of woodworm, shows a bit of quality.

-How do you work that out?

Age. Gives you the age.

I would like to buy these here, those there,

they can go as one lot, and the two books.

And I'm going to be mean.

Well, I make it 75 quid.

See you then, Richard, it's been fantastic. Thank you ever so much.

-I'll try and call in again sometime.

-Come on, be sensible,

-make the offer then.

-I'll tell you what. You just sit down

a minute, I'll get the book. Sit down. No, just sit down.

So, Richard's starting price for all of the items was £75.

-What can Philip bargain him down to?

-JAMES BOND THEME PLAYS

-You ought to be paying me to take them away.

-No, no, I'm in business.

I'll give you 30 quid the lot, that's the end of it.

-Done.

-Ha-ha! What have I done?

So, Philip has his first two lots and plenty of badinage to boot.

Thank you, Richard.

Thomas, meanwhile, is happy with his morning shopping so he's headed on

to Pinchbeck in Lincolnshire.

Thomas is aiming for the Burtey Fen Collection,

a quirky local attraction

with plenty of showbiz pizzazz.

He's meeting local owner Nick Pitts.

Hello, I'm Thomas.

Hi, I'm Nick. Welcome to the Burtey Fen Collection.

So, what are you going to show me today?

We've got a concert hall with organs in, different pipe organs.

This purpose-built hall houses four magnificent pipe organs.

We've got a very small fairground organ,

a large classical church organ

and two cinema organs.

It's the cinema organs in particular that Thomas is here to see.

Originally designed to accompany silent films,

these organs were installed from the 1920s onwards.

It was invented by the Wurlitzer firm. And then, in Britain,

there were two main firms, Compton's and Christie's.

By the 1960s, most cinema organs were being removed.

But this Compton organ was saved, and eventually was installed here,

where the public are welcomed to regular performances.

The organ can produce or mimic the sounds of many different

instruments, and even make sound effects.

-So, for example, you could try the glock or the xylophone.

-ORGAN PLAYS

Or flutes. Or trumpets.

Clarinets. Anything you like.

TINKLING

Oh, it's like something out of Hi-de-Hi!, isn't it?

DRUMMING

Oh!

BUZZING

Ha-ha, that's quite enough of that! Now, Nick's going to let Thomas see

-into the belly of this marvellous beast.

-You're pointing me to it?

-You'll soon find where you are.

-Oh, right. In here?

Definitely? God.

Are these all the pipes? Look at these big ones here.

There are real instruments installed inside the machine

-that Nick can play from his keyboards.

-Oh, my!

I can see the drums, the tambourine. DRUMS PLAY

Ha, there it is!

It's wonderful, and the bass drum?

BASS DRUM RUMBLES

And very far back, are they the chimes?

-Yep. They are the chimes.

-CHIMES PLAY

It's brilliant.

Go on, Nick, play something.

Nick's going to play the very tune that was

first publicly performed on the organ in 1934 - Sing As We Go.

HE PLAYS SONG

DROWNED OUT: I don't think he can hear me!

Well, Nick, that was amazing. Thank you very much. A wall of sound

-and I'm still in awe of your musicality.

-You're very welcome.

Thank you.

Meanwhile, Philip is still on a buying spree and has driven

to New Bolingbroke.

He's heading for Junktion Antiques, where he's meeting owner, Jack.

-Hello.

-Morning.

-How are you doing?

-This looks like my sort of place, this does.

-That's good then.

-I'm Philip. How are you doing?

-Jack.

-Good to see you.

Stuffed with motoring memorabilia, old contraptions,

fairground items and all manner of old gubbins,

this shop could scarcely be more to Philip's taste.

E-Type Jaguars. Oh, this is going to be brilliant.

Jack even has some of the agricultural items Philip was so

unsuccessful in finding this morning.

-Threshing machine.

-Yeah.

-And how much is that?

That could be, er, £50.

-Oh, hold on. Hold on.

-My friend.

I'm not sure that will fit in the car!

Thankfully, Philip has decided against the enormous threshing

machine, but he's got something else to worry about.

He loves Jack's stock, but with just over £190 in his wallet,

he's finding that much of it is outside his budget.

-How much is that?

-£300.

-This thing here, how much is that?

-£1,500.

-Oh, no...

Jack, how much is that?

Er, 225.

But I do guarantee it. It is working(!)

THEY CHUCKLE

How much is the iron founders' sign?

£200.

PHILIP SIGHS

You don't sell aspirin, do you?

I think this is just the best shop ever.

Trouble is, Jack, you're like a rhino - thick-skinned

and charge a lot.

It costs a lot.

Indeed. Much of Jack's stock is unusual or specialist,

which might be why Philip's finding so much of it

out of his price range.

But after a real rummage, he spots something that might help him

get the jump on Thomas - a wooden vaulting horse. Oh, Lordy.

-How much is that, Jack?

-That could be...

-Come on, Jack, now think hard here.

-£90.

-No, think harder.

-100.

Oh, Jack, no, no, no. Now, can we have a deal on that?

Where do you want to be?

Well, I see it at auction as making 50 to 80 quid.

£70.

This may seem like another of Phil's eccentric enthusiasms, but the horse

could in fact be a canny buy.

And why am I going to buy this?

They make great coffee tables, don't they?

You take the top two off and you've got a small ottoman

at the end of your bed. And then, out of these other sections,

you put a glass top on them and you've got a really cool coffee table.

-I feel I'm too cheap again.

-Oh, God Almighty, Jack,

will you just shut up, Jack?

-Philip, how rude!

-We'll have a talk about that in a minute.

Still, at least he dug up something else that interests him.

-Is that a malt shovel?

-Yeah.

Malt is germinated and dried grain,

used in the production of beer, whisky and foodstuffs.

This probably dates from the early 20th century.

Can I give you...

-60 quid for this and the vaulting horse?

-No.

What can I give you?

-£100.

-Oh, behave, Jack!

I'll shake your hand, Jack, at 80 quid the two.

-90 quid and you've got a deal.

-85.

-No, 90.

-85.

-90.

-85.

-90.

-85.

-No, 90.

Because I like you.

Go on then, Jack. You are a gentleman, thank you.

Jack's one tough cookie when it comes to haggling,

but Philip's got the malt shovel and the vaulting horse,

so everyone's a winner.

And with that, Philip's heading south to meet Thomas.

Night night, chaps.

But our pair are no stay-a-bits,

and the new day finds them back in the Stag and charging ahead.

All I know, really, is that we are a long way from home.

You are, Thomas. Isn't it exciting?

So far, Thomas has spent £50 on two lots - the medals

issued by the Royal Antediluvian Order of Buffaloes,

and the bronze paperweight.

While his rival Philip has so far spent £120 on four lots -

the two James Bond books,

the wine rack and bread trays,

the malt shovel and the wooden vaulting horse.

How bizarre.

Spalding. What do you know about Spalding?

Glad you asked. They're driving into the town of Spalding.

Which is an ancient market town known as the Heart of the Fens,

at the centre of an area famous for its rich soil and agriculture.

Spalding in Lincolnshire. It was...

Was it once... No, it wasn't, it wasn't.

No, it wasn't.

Well done, Thomas. Got there in the end.

You going to go in here then?

-I'm going to go there, yeah.

-Go on, matey, have a wander off.

Philip is striking out on his own again while Thomas is heading

into his first shop, where he'll meet owner, John.

-Thank you for letting us come here.

-You're very welcome.

-Can I have a look round?

-You can, with pleasure.

-How nice.

There's an item in a cabinet that he might like to try his luck on.

What's that Bullion Board?

-A game, I think, Thomas.

-Philips Bullion Board.

"This is a bullion board game, a three-in-one sensational indoor game."

The aluminium board allows the lucky purchaser to play

the rather obscure games bullion and poker bullion.

Or good old-fashioned draughts.

It's quite fun actually, and I like the graphics on it. They are great,

aren't they, the colours as well? They're very 1960s, aren't they?

-Yes, I would think they are.

-How much is this?

I can't see a price on it, Thomas.

-Oh, there's no price on it.

-It could be £10 to you, sir.

That seems fair enough, doesn't it?

-Thank you very much, I'll have that.

-You're welcome.

I noticed you've got a chess set round the corner.

Continuing with the games theme, John will fetch the wooden chess pieces Thomas has spied.

-These are the ones you were on about, are they?

-I saw those.

Is it complete?

-I think they're all there, yes.

-I better count them.

-Yeah, you count.

-Do you mind?

-No, I don't mind.

They're all there, 32 pieces.

It's got a little slide box. Nicely carved.

Made in France.

The pieces are all present and correct.

But they're selling without a chess board.

There's no ticket on them either.

What should John do?

-It could be £15.

-15? Could I have both of them for 20?

-I should think you could.

-Well, I think that makes a nice addition,

-doesn't it?

-Yes.

Yeah. Thomas is planning to parcel the two games

he's bought into one lot, but he's still looking for more bargains.

His magpie eye has alighted on a collection of paste jewellery,

including a 19th-century French buckle,

an Art Deco cuff and three other bracelets.

I quite like this paste.

Do quite like that. Very pretty.

Paste is inexpensive jewellery,

sometimes including polished cut glass instead of precious gemstones.

Oh, suits you, Thomas.

Now, what kind of price can John offer?

-60 quid for the lot.

-£60?

-Really?

-Yes, really.

-Really?

-Yes.

-You'll make a good profit on those, Thomas.

-I don't think I will.

What could you do?

I'll do you the lot for 50 and that would be it.

Mmm...

-40 and we've got a deal.

-No. I can't do that.

-45.

48 and we'll have a deal.

Oh, for the love of God.

-£48.

-£48.

So it's 20 and the 48 makes £68. There's 70.

But John can only find £1.20 in change

rather than the two pounds Thomas is owed.

-80 pence more.

-That's the best I can do, Thomas.

I think I can survive. Thank you very much.

-Thank you, Thomas. Nice to see you.

-And you.

So, Thomas has taken the Bullion Board game,

the chess pieces and the collection of paste jewellery.

A couple of minutes away, old Phil has gone for a wander around

Spalding town centre. Once again he's determined to go off-piste.

Oh, crikey.

Eventually, he finds a shop that fires him with enthusiasm.

I think that looks interesting because it is Elderkin's gunmakers.

You never know, they might have some old accessories that might be quite useful.

DOOR BUZZER

This is a gunsmith with a venerable pedigree. Five generations of

the same family have run the business,

dating back nearly 130 years.

Of course, shotguns like the ones sold in this shop require

a shotgun certificate under UK laws.

But shop owner William has generously agreed to let Philip

look around to see if there might be any antique accessories

he could buy.

Right, we're on a mission now.

Never happier than when contemplating a lathe,

Philip's in the shotgun workshop.

What I love about this job is social history.

You come in here and there's guys who've got a skill

that probably was quite commonplace 50 years ago.

But it's a dying art.

Have you got any really old gun cleaning kits?

Eventually, Philip uncovers a small collection of shotgun accessories.

Here we've got an oil bottle which will fit in your motoring case.

And you'd have taken it with you and that would've just oiled your gun. That's quite a nice thing.

This is a little brush and that would have just brushed around

the trigger guards and possibly on the hammer guard to keep it clean.

This is for pulling cartridges out of the gun. If your cartridge got

stuck in your gun, you'd clip that round the outside

and that would pull the cartridge out.

And then finally we've got this great thing here

which is just... You put that in the end of your barrels

and that's just when you're not using the gun. And that's to stop

anything from dropping down there.

What sort of price can Philip agree with William?

-At auction they'll make 10 or 20 quid, eh?

-Something like that.

So if I give you a fiver or something, would that be fair?

-That's fine.

-Bang on!

I'm going to a shooting area, so fingers crossed

that they do OK for me. What a lovely man and what a great shop.

And with that, he's got his lots for auction.

The boys are reunited and back in the car.

Where are you going? Where am I taking you?

No idea.

Stamford.

They are indeed driving the 20 miles to Stamford, Lincolnshire.

But it looks like the weather's turned.

Philip, we are driving through a wall of rain.

Hmmm. That looks pleasant. Shame the car doesn't have a roof!

Mind you, I don't know why people go abroad in the summer, do you?

Happily, it's much drier in Stamford.

Largely built from Lincolnshire limestone, Stamford's lovely,

historic buildings give it a unique atmosphere.

Thomas is off to a shop, but since Philip's bought all his lots

for auction, he's decided to visit a particularly ancient local landmark.

-You have a lovely visit.

-You have a good shop, mate.

He's on his way to Browne's Hospital,

which just slightly predates the local NHS Trust...

..where he's meeting curator Pam Sharp.

-Hello, I'm Philip. How are you?

-I'm very well, thank you.

This is the most fantastic building. Tell me. This was a hospital?

No, it was never an infirmary.

Hospital was in the mediaeval sense of the word, meaning hospitality.

Built in 1475, this was an almshouse,

a home for the local poor,

many of whom were workers from nearby estates

who lost their tied cottages when they became too old or ill to work.

Who was the benefactor who set all this up?

William and Margaret Browne, who were very rich wool merchants,

who lived in Stamford, in a house just next door.

-Would it be possible to look round?

-Yes, of course.

The Brownes created a large endowment of land which brought

in an income and funded the hospital's work for many centuries.

This was the common room where the men lived,

and each man had a cubicle.

There were five cubicles down this side providing each man

with a window, and then five cubicles down this side.

But, if you come up here, you can have a look at a little drawing

of how it was and a little model.

There were wooden partitions

giving each man his privacy

and here is a little model of how it would have been.

That is a fabulous building through there. What's that?

That's the Chancery Chapel, where services were held every day.

Prayer was central to the lives of the men who lived here.

The men had a duty to perform when they came in here.

They had to pray for the souls of Margaret and William Browne

who had, by then, died

and also for King Henry VII and his queen, Elizabeth.

And there would be services in the chapel every day.

This is a glorious building, isn't it?

MONASTIC CHORAL MUSIC

So, what happened when it ceased to become an almshouse?

-It's still an almshouse.

-Even now?

-Yes, we have 13 residents.

-Really?

-Yes.

-But not in here?

-No, not now.

They're in cottages around the cloister, which were built in 1870.

It was thought that this was not really suitable any longer.

Incredibly, the hospital continues

in almost exactly its original function today,

over 500 years later.

Anyone who doesn't own property can apply to come and live here

at low cost and in a tranquil setting.

All of the residents are of retirement age

and there is a waiting list.

And this community still lives today.

It's still thriving today. So, why do you think Browne did this?

Why did he, in 1475, why did he set all this up?

He was very concerned about people, and their welfare

and the welfare of people who had worked on his estate, probably.

-And today, there's a waiting list, presumably?

-There's a waiting list.

I've been thinking, what I'd better do, Pam,

is start behaving myself and actually get my name on that waiting list.

Maybe you should!

Behaving yourself, Philip? I'll believe that when I see it!

So, with thanks to Pam, Philip's leaving the hospital

to continue the good work it has been doing for so many centuries.

Thomas is nearby and is still looking for his last items.

Helped by shop owner, Peter.

Hello, Thomas, Peter my name is, nice to meet you.

-Couple of Meccanos out there.

-I like the Meccano.

Thomas is mad about toys and games and he's found yet another

playful item which might help him build up a profit.

I'll have a look in there. What's that?

Brings back memories?

-Did you have Meccano as a boy?

-Meccano, yes, many bricks...

The box of Meccano is priced up at £48.

I quite like the look of the Meccano.

-If we could work out what we can do on that.

-We could, yes.

I'm going to go looking. Do you mind?

HONKS SHRILLY

-Yes. A ship's foghorn.

-Is it really?

-Yes.

It's got quite a good look, sort of a Modernist table.

It's just quite shabby, isn't it?

It...certainly is! It says £40 on the ticket.

£40. It's on wheels.

I don't think, bless it, it's got the greatest of age. Oh, no...

Bit 1980s, isn't it?

The table belongs to dealer, Tina.

-Hello, is this yours?

-Yes it is, yes.

It's very sort of '70s, '80s, isn't it?

Here I am on my knees.

I know, lovely. Quite! I've got a TV star on his knees, begging!

A TV star?! Where?

But it seems Tina has already been visited on a previous Road Trip.

I've already had your mate once, and sorted him out.

Philip? You've had old Philip, have you?

-Yes, he called me a Rottweiler!

-That doesn't sound like Phil.

Old scores aside, what sort of deal might Tina strike on the table?

Is it something you want to move on? What can I have it for?

-What were you...

-Well, nothing, really.

-Oh, come on!

THOMAS LAUGHS

-I was going to swear, but I'm not allowed to.

-No.

-I'm on my knees.

-I'm begging.

-£20.

-I can't say fairer than that. £20. Thank you very much.

-Can I give you a kiss?

-Ooh!

Mwah! Mwah! I think you might have restored Tina's faith

in the Road Trip, Thomas. Good work.

And Peter has now spoken to the dealer

who's selling the Meccano set, And what price might he offer?

-Give it a whirl, and we could do it for 25.

-25.

That could go in with my toys, couldn't it? Yes. 25 quid.

It'll go down, I'll go down to 20.

I'll go for the Meccano. I like the Meccano. There's a lot here.

We'll go for that, and we will go for the table, so, 20 for that,

and 20 for that, ie £40.

Now, Thomas, too, has all his lots for auction.

And he's off to meet Philip.

They've repaired to the stately environs

of nearby Burleigh House, for the great unveiling.

Thomas will kick off proceedings.

-Go on.

-I'm so excited.

-Really?

-Oh, yes.

-Look at that. Can I pick this up?

-Yeah, go ahead.

I quite like that.

-Let's get some prices here. How much was that lot?

-40.

-And how much was that?

-10.

-That's for nothing!

What about these three?

-These, the tomfoolery, 48, and 80p.

-That's 120.

But Philip's considerably less impressed by the reflective table.

Someone's left that out the cafeteria.

No, no, look...

-Crikey.

-On casters.

-Well, that makes it, doesn't it?

-Should I leave it here?

Mate, I think probably not.

-What did you pay for that?

-20.

-Was it dark?

-What do you mean, was it dark?

-Were you in a dark room?

-No, I thought it was quite a cool thing.

It's a funky occasional table.

If you say so, Thomas.

Now, will Philip's lots impress his rival?

-There should be a fanfare of trumpets, really.

-OK...

FANFARE

How much wine do you...?

I do like the odd tipple.

And, an added bonus, there are two bread trays.

I think the bread trays make the lot.

-15 quid. For the lot. You ready for this?

-Yep.

Malt shovel - £15.

-Can I pick this one up? Very you.

-It is, isn't it?

-It is indeed.

-What's this lot here?

-That's a fantastic lot.

I went to the gun shop in Spalding, this lovely man who owned it,

he came to me with this little job lot of shooting accessories. £5.

Now, Philip's saved the best or at least the biggest till last.

Here you are, Thomas. Look at that. Isn't that brilliant?

A vaulting horse. I think that is absolutely first class.

-How much was that?

-£75.

-I was going to tell you what I think, as well.

No, I don't want to know.

PHILIP SINGS: # Na-na-na-na na...

-I tell you what, I tell you what we'll do.

-What?

We'll wait till the auction.

Just before we get to that, what do Thomas and Philip have to say

about their rival's items when their back's turned?

It's all about the vaulting horse, isn't it?

Is it going to make a profit? Touch and go, touch and go.

I think that wine rack is his secret weapon.

That sweet trolley he's bought, why on earth did he buy that?

The only thing that's missing off it is a Black Forest gateau.

Mmm! That sounds rather delicious. Mmm! Oh!

On this leg, the boys have driven over 150 miles

through the eastern English fenlands

to end up at their auction in Ely, Cambridgeshire.

The ancient city of Ely towers over the rich,

flat fenlands that surround it.

Work began on its magnificent cathedral in the 11th century.

There's Ely cathedral, straight ahead.

They're heading for Rowley Fine Art Auctioneers.

-Thomas, here we are.

-Here we are.

-Ely.

-Are you excited?

I'm very excited. I think you're going to thrash me today.

I think your vaulting horse is going to do £350.

We shall see.

Auctioneer Will holds our lads' fate in his hands today.

But before he takes to the podium, what does he think of their lots?

Generally, we were reasonably impressed.

The vaulting horse I think might possibly struggle a little

bit there. The little bronze buffalo, that's rather sweet.

Malt shovel and the Meccano and so on,

it's really just who's here on the day.

All very interesting.

Thomas Plant started this leg with £258.28.

He spent £158.80 on five lots.

While Philip Serrell began with £220.62.

He spent £125 on the nose and also has five lots to show for it.

The auction's about to commence. May the best buys win!

First up, it's Thomas's bronze buffalo paperweight.

Will it run wild?

20, surely, to start me at 20.

10, I'm bid, at 10 only, 12, 15, 18,

20, 25, 25 I'm bid. Thank you.

Rounded up now, Mrs M, no? At 28 it is here.

All done, then, are you sure? At £28 and selling!

-That's like 180% profit.

-No, it's not.

Oh, yes it is!

Really, really pleased for you(!)

Next, Philip's Bond books, sans dust jackets.

Might these prove a licence to print money?

20, then, start me for the two. At £20. Grace any bookshelf.

£10, start me then, bid.

At 10, 12, 15, 18, 20, 22, 25, now,

at 25, who else is in? 28?

Right, elsewhere, it's 28. Shake it the other way, madam.

Surely, you can't value them for £2. £28 in the corner.

He works hard, Will.

All done, then, are you sure? Last chance, in the corner at 28.

28 seems to be a recurring theme here, doesn't it?

I just hope that it doesn't continue throughout the sale.

Indeed! But that sale is respectable, if not a killer.

Now, Thomas's medals

awarded by the Royal Antediluvian Order Of Buffaloes.

£50, would you start me for those, surely, 50,

for all the medals, surely. 30, then, start me, give me a wave.

At £30, will you? Well 20, sir, thank you.

At £20. £20 is all I'm bid in the room.

At 20, 2, at 5, 28, 30, 5, 35, shake it the other way.

35 here, I'll take 8 if it helps. At £35 and selling this time at 35...

-Oh!

-Crushing.

A disappointing loss there for Thomas.

That's turned out quite nicely.

Yes(!)

But let's see if Philip's next lot might be in with a shot.

It's the collection of shooting accessories.

£30 for those, well, 20 to get on, if you must.

£20 for the shooting accessories. A tenner then.

Have a look at me now, bid, at 10. 12, 15, 18.

You know what? You've doubled your money! And more.

At 15, are you all done? Trying me best here, at £15.

A tidy profit on a well-hunted lot.

Thomas's paste jewellery is next to go under the hammer.

Will cut glass prove to be a boy's best friend?

I'm bid 30 here, £30 I have. You bidding? At 35, 40, 45, 50.

-Bids are in.

-One more might do it, five. At 55, it's in the room.

Well, only just.

55, 60, fresh blood. At £60, left-handed now.

5, at 65, 70.

You know your jewellery, don't you?

At 75, at 80, 5, at 85, 90.

Before you at 90, can't see you, at 95.

Round it up now, 100 bid, at 100, left-handed at 100 now.

10 might do it, at 110. Yes? 110. At 110, I'm bid.

Last chance at 110.

-That's done really well. That's put you in profit.

-It's all right.

I'm really, really, really pleased for...

THEY LAUGH

A gem of a profit there to Thomas.

But can he repeat the trick

as his job lot of board games and Meccano enter play?

-15 here with me at 15.

-I told you...

On the Meccano, at £15, are we all done? 18 bid, the voice said 18 now.

At 18, my bid is out already at 18. Who'll round it up, 20?

Yes or no, I shan't dwell. At £18...

That's not so bad then, is it?

THOMAS SIGHS

Oh, dear, oh, dear.

Can Philip's malt shovel do any better?

20 bid, at 20... Already there.

At £20 I'm bid, on a maiden bid of 20.

I shall sell it then on a maiden bid at 20,

it's going to be, last chance...

-£20.

-It's a fiver profit.

It manages to dig up a small profit.

Now the, er, "funky" occasional table?

£30 for it, surely, for you trendy, young things?

£20 then, start me for it. £10 surely. Start me, ten, at 5.

Bid, at £5, a bid of £5. Are you all done, ladies and gentlemen?

It's here to be sold, make no mistake. At £5, you all done? 129.

That's just sort of wound it back a bit, hasn't it?

It seems the crowd were no keener on it than Philip.

I'm not going to start crowing too soon,

because I could be there with you in a minute.

You're learning, Phil!

The enormous wine rack and bread trays are next.

£10 is all I'm bid, at £12.

Elsewhere? At 12, 15, 18.

You're in profit, you're in profit!

22, can't see you, 25. At 25, the hammer is up at 25...

30! At 30.

Wow, I think!

Don't lose it for a bid, 40 bid.

At 40 bid, £40, at £40...

Philip earns a lip-smacking profit.

And now the very last lot - the vaulting horse.

Philip's great leap of faith.

£100 will it be for the vaulting horse?

£100 to start me? Well, £50 then, a giggle from the back.

-At £50, start me for it, will you? At £30, bid me. £30 I'm bid.

-Ouch!

Still got a few legs.

At £30, are you all done? I shan't dwell. At £30. All done then at £30.

No, no... Ouch!

And it lands face down on the gymnasium floor. Schplat!

-There is a plus side to this.

-What?

The less it sells for, the less commission you have to give out.

I'm glad you can see the funny side, old boy. Ha-ha!

Philip began this leg with £220.62

and thanks to the vaulting horse and auction costs,

he made a stinging loss of £15.94,

putting him almost back where he started with £204.68.

Thomas, on the other hand, began today with £250.28.

After paying costs, he squeaked a less than glorious profit

of £1.92, finishing this leg with £252.20.

And making him today's winner!

That was a great day, wasn't it?

Great day. Great day for you.

Great day for you, because you could've lost a lot more!

Well, there's always tomorrow, boys!

To the Stag, and away to the next bout.

ENGINE REVS

Next time on the Antiques Road Trip, Thomas is up to mischief.

It sounds really wrong, what I'm about to say, but I fancy

buying a bit of flesh today.

Much to Philip's distaste.

Have you seen that? It's plaster of Paris, it's like a garden gnome!

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd