Mark Franks vs Paul Hayes: Auction Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is

We've all seen them on TV,

but how will the country's favourite antiques experts fare

when they're challenged to make a profit with their own cash?

Watch out!

Who's going to make the biggest profit of all?

Me!

From car-boot sales to auction houses,

our experts will be recreating some of their real-life deals

as they go head to head and try and make the most money

for their chosen charities.

Come on, Knowles!

The competition is really hot.

The challenge to our experts is clear -

dealers, put your money where your mouth is.

Today's profit-hunting pair are collectibles connoisseur Paul "Mr Morecambe" Hayes,

and the irrepressible Mark "Franksy" Franks.

If you really want to become an antique dealer, choose a subject,

research it, know what you're looking at,

then go out and try and buy and sell within that subject.

Do homework, and you can still make a living.

Mark's no-nonsense approach and determination to win have served him well,

whether it be turning Trash To Cash or finding hidden treasures on Car Booty.

His opponent today is a second-generation antique dealer,

who first started buying and selling while he was at school.

Since then, he's grown up to become a well-respected expert with a real passion for porcelain.

I'm a big fan of Chinese ceramics.

The Chinese had the secret of making porcelain for over 2,000 years

before we even came close,

so there's a whole wealth of items out there which are extremely well made and beautifully produced.

And I think, er, the fascination there is,

how could something be so delicate and so lovely,

but made over 1,000 years ago? It's amazing.

Paul can regularly be found hunting for Cash In The Attic or transforming Trash To Cash.

-Can we have a whoo, please?

-Whoo!

We're actually going to start our auction.

Today, Paul has the home advantage,

because we've brought our London lad out of the Big Smoke and up to the beautiful Lake District,

just over 50 miles from Morecambe.

So, with our experts ready for action,

it's time for us to find out what challenge they'll be facing today.

-Hey! Hello.

-Hello, mate.

-Welcome to the North. How are you?

-Bit tired - six hours' drive.

I was told there was a stranger in town. It must be you.

It is. You'll have to translate. I don't understand a word anyone says. Can I just say one thing?

-Go on.

-Pigeons.

Get a lot of those in London. What are these?

These are sheep, mate! Where do you get a view like that in London? You don't, do you?

Perhaps at the supermarket.

-There's actually an auction going on as well.

-I've got this for you.

-That's for you. Let's have a look.

Right, it says,

-"Mark and Paul, your challenge today is to spend £1,000..."

-Easy.

Give it to my missus! That'll do the job.

"..of your own money on antiques."

There's always a downside, in't there?

"You must then resell your purchases with the aim of making as much profit as possible.

"The winner is the presenter who makes the most cash."

Mine says, "Today you must buy all your antiques from an auction house. Good luck."

We do know that auction is going on there for the sheep, but I do believe they have another auction over there.

-OK. Let's go.

-OK. Get your wellies.

MUSIC: THEME TO "The Professionals"

So, Mark and Paul can spend up to £1,000

of their own money on antiques, with the aim of selling them on for a profit.

They're going head to head at the Penrith farmers' and kids' auction house.

Spending so much of your own money at an auction

is not for the faint hearted,

but luckily, our boys are professionals.

With years of experience in the antiques trade,

they know how to spot fakes and forgeries from the real McCoy.

They're a formidable force,

but which expert will collar the antiques with the most potential profit?

With the start of the auction looming,

it's time for Mr Morecambe and his southern rival to set to work.

As our antiques professionals head inside and start looking through the lots on offer,

Mark's strategy is to pick up pieces that he really believes in.

Paul is hoping to line up items that he thinks won't be spotted by other bidders,

and that he can snap up for a bargain price.

Both our experts are determined to pick out game-winning pieces,

and Mark has got his eye on something that he thinks could swing things in his favour.

I'm going to have a go at this club. It's lovely. It's a hickory shaft, which means it's made of wood,

opposed to the metal shafts which originally came out, I think, in the 1930s.

They were originally painted to make them look like wood,

because it was a bit nouveau riche to have metal shafts.

There are two lots, 236 and 237.

If I can afford two, I'll have a go at buying these.

Mar certainly seems keen on the golf clubs.

And it's time now for the auction to begin.

Get your bidders' numbers ready. Lot 1, the Beswick figure...

50, 60. 60 bid.

With competition from bidders in the room, on the phone and online,

this isn't going to be easy.

As all their profits are going to charity,

the auctioneer has kindly waived his commission

and with bidding in full swing, Mark has got his eyes on a cuddly toy.

The 20th-century monkey soft toy. £20 bid for that. At 20.

£20 bid, the soft toy. At 20...

Five. 25 bid. At 25, the soft toy.

Away, selling. In the room, then, at £25.

6158.

I only bought that cos it reminded me of Paul!

# Hey, hey, we're the Monkees

# And people say we monkey around... #

Well, he might be poking fun at Paul - and let's face it, it's not the first time -

but Mr Franks is deadly serious about winning today's contest.

The first set of golf clubs he was interested in

sold for almost £400 and Mark decided they were too expensive.

Will he have any more luck with the second lot?

The estimate is £100-£150.

Four hickory-shafted golf clubs this time.

80, £90 bid. 90 for those, at 90.

90 bid. The lot at 90. 100. £100 bid. At 100.

£100 the lot. At 100.

-£100 bid. Standing, then, at 100.

-Here we go.

-100 pounds the lot.

-Put the hammer down.

-Selling at £100. 6158.

He's got them. Isn't that fantastic? 100 quid. That was for four.

I used to sell them like £10 or £15 for four.

HE CHUCKLES

Four clubs. There we go.

That's a real result.

Mark put his hand up and is walking away with four vintage golf clubs.

With his opponent up and running in the buying stakes,

Paul strikes back, bagging an onyx desk set for £160.

-I wouldn't touch 'em with a bargepole.

-Well, it might not be Mark's cup of tea,

but we'll find out later if the set is anything to write home about, when his rival tries to sell it.

With one item in the bag each,

there's nothing to choose between our battling experts.

There are still hundreds of lots left to bid on

and earlier today, Mark and Paul hunted through the pieces on offer

in search of game-winning items.

Come and have a look at this.

I've got a mate who's a silver dealer and he's an old romantic.

Now, check out this inscriptions.

"We heal all wounds save those of love."

What's it? Well, it's a solid silver stamp case. It's made in London.

It's not hugely unusual

but the inscription is just so delightful that I'm going to have a go at this.

£80 to £120, so roughly £100.

Not a lot of money these days, and I've got a buyer in mind.

Paul Hayes, watch out.

That's fighting talk from Mark,

and he's also spotted a pair of very collectible silver spoons.

It's made in Birmingham. It's got the anchor.

It was presented to Red Chief at Crufts.

Now, I think these are great fun.

I've been on the internet and I've found out that the Bulldog Club does still exist.

So I'm going to try and buy these and see if I can tell sell them back to the club.

Well, that's a quirky lot Mr Franks has spotted,

and he's got a plan to sell the spoons if he manages to buy them.

There are two competitors in today's contest, though,

and Paul has picked out something he thinks has the potential to help him get his paws on a good profit.

Now this book actually dates from 1769 and it's a book of animals.

If you look on the front piece - look at that.

Or beasts, as they know it today. This is everything that was known to man in the year 1769.

And what I love about them is that lots of the animals featured in here,

very, very few people had actually seen.

They were all in darkest Africa or in America, or somewhere well out of reach from people.

Look at this one here. You've got a manticore. Look at that.

What a strange looking animal that is. I think it's fascinating stuff.

Anybody interested in animals, anybody interested in old books.

This is in the sale here today between £50 and £100.

I think it's fantastic. But let's see how we get on.

It's something I can bid for. Hopefully, I can get it. Would be nice.

Paul might be hoping that the antique animal book will be a roaring success for him,

but before he gets the chance to bid for it,

Mark's British Bulldog silver spoons are going before the room with an estimate of £50 to £80.

I'd love to buy them for less than 50 quid.

Do you know, I hadn't spotted these, actually. Mark spotted these.

-£30. 5...

-British Bulldog Club. Quite interesting.

-45, 50.

Ah, he doesn't mess about, does he, Mark? He must be into bulldogs.

55, 55, 55, 60.

-55.

-65, 65, 70.

70 bid. At 70, the lot at 70. Standing there at 70. £70. I think he's done well there.

-He's bought them for 70 quid.

-Put the hammer down.

A bit more than I wanted to pay but... It's only money.

Indeed it is, Mr Franks, but it's YOUR money!

And he did have to pay a little more than he was hoping to.

Having watched his opponent buy a silver lot, Paul has decided to try and buy one of his own.

Come on, Mum. I need your help.

It's a set of cloverleaf dishes with an estimate of £80 to £100.

Clovers, there. 55, 65.

£65 bid. The clover leaves, at 65.

70, 5, 75, 80, £80 bid. £80 bid for the clover leaves, then.

I might have them.

80. 80 bid. 5. 85. 90. Competition.

I think he's going for these, the swine.

£90 bid. 5. He's come again.

100. 100. 100.

-Battling power.

-£100.

-Thank you very much. Thank you, Mark.

-It's how we do it in London.

-Is it?

I'll make a note of that. Thank you very much. There we go.

6157.

Oh, it looks like Mark will stop at nothing to win today's contest.

Those bids against Paul have pushed the price up.

All's fair in love and war. It is a competition, after all.

Excuse me, Mark.

Can I explain the rules to you? The way it's done up here, it's all done very gentlemanly.

If you see your friend bid for something, you leave them alone. How does it work in London?

I was just scratching my nose.

No you weren't! You put me up £20.

-Did you really want them?

-Yeah!

-Yeah?

Honest. Sorry, mate.

Yes, there's definitely a North-South divide in the auction room today.

And next up is the stamp case which Mark is hoping to pocket for no more than £100.

Will he be successful or will it be a case of return to sender?

-It's the late Victorian silver stamp case.

-Pretty.

-30, 50, 60 bid. £60 bid.

70. £70 bid for that one at 70.

£70 the lot. 70, 80. £80 bid. 80 for that one. 90.

£90 bid. 90. 100, 100 bid.

-110, 110, 110.

-I spotted this. It's a really nice little thing.

A very small bit of silver but very collectible, a little stamp case. 150.

-160.

-Oh, 160.

-170.

-170. It seems a lot of money for a stamp case, doesn't it?

-170. My bidder's back.

-Gentleman's in. Selling at £170.

-I think he's paid well over the odds for that.

Right, I've just bought a stamp case for 170 quid.

I'm going to stamp all over Hayes.

Well, Mark seems happy with his purchase

but £170 seems a lot for that piece.

And there's a surprise in store for Franksy when he tries to sell it.

Has he really bought a stamp case? We'll find out a little later.

Things are really heating up in the saleroom and Paul is hoping to strike back.

He's spotted a pair of very collectible 19th Century Spode plates

with an estimate of £50 to £80 and has decided to try and buy them.

-Here are these plates. Now, I fancy a go.

-45. 45 for those.

At 45. 45 for those. 50.

£50 bid for those, at 50. 50 bid.

£50, the Spode there at 50.

I think I might have got them.

-Excellent.

-Selling at £50. 6157.

That's more like it, isn't it? A result.

So, without his southern rival bidding him up, Paul has got himself a bit of a bargain.

And although he and Mark are friends, Paul's on his home patch

and is determined to win today's contest.

MUSIC: "Eye of the Tiger" by Survivor

It's North versus South in a no-holds-barred auction showdown.

40 bid. At £40 bid.

-45. £45 bid.

-Paul moves quickly and snaps up the antique animal book.

Selling at £45.

-Thank you.

-6157.

And having bought one vintage book, has got his eyes on another.

It's a 17th-century Parliamentary chronicle.

55. 55. 60 bid. £60 bid.

65. It's online. 70. 70 bid.

He doesn't know what "online" means.

I'm bidding against the Internet. Is it Oliver Cromwell?

-Bidding against the Internet.

-85 - 90.

This is the nearest Paul's been to technology in years.

-95. 100.

-100.

The price is climbing towards the top estimate of £120, but Paul is not giving up.

As the bidding goes higher, his potential profit is getting smaller and smaller.

-100 bid. At 100.

-Go on, Paul.

105. Still online. 110.

110 in the room. At 110.

-Go on, Paul. Go on, Paul!

-Come on!

-Drop the hammer!

-110. 110. 120.

-Oh, no!

-130.

130. Bidder's in the room again. 130, against the online bidder.

-Selling in the room.

-Can you unplug it?

-At £130.

-Result!

-Paul's beaten a computer.

It was me and the Internet there. I wonder who that was, actually.

He's managed to buy a dirty, rotten old book.

Mark's taste in books might not be the same as Paul's, but Mr Morecambe isn't afraid to splash the cash.

But just how much of their budgets have he and Franks spent?

Mark and Paul started the day with up to £1,000

of their own money in their pockets.

Mr Hayes has spent £485,

meaning that he's got 515 left in his kitty.

Battersea's finest has parted with £365,

leaving him with £635 still to spend.

So both our experts have got plenty of money left in their pockets.

There are hundreds of lots left to bid on, and earlier today,

Mark and Paul went through the items on offer

to try and pick out the lots they thought could win them today's contest.

Do you know what? Today I feel like I'm sailing into battle, especially against that Mark Franks.

He's very good, isn't he? But I think he's missed something here. It's an old white £5 note.

Now, this is when money WAS money.

Now, this one dates 1949,

and I was trying to work out that the average wage at that time

was about £3 a week. All right?

So you'd have to be a foreman or a bank manager or something to earn this sort of money.

But they were decommissioned in the 1960s

and, of course, people got the newer version.

You couldn't really afford to hang on to them, so there's not many on the market.

It's in the catalogue here today at between £40 and £60,

and I think it's a fantastic item for a collector.

I'm willing to pay maybe 80 to 100, but let's see how we get on.

Well, we'll find out shortly if Paul is able to make the winning bid on the white £5 note.

And with his rival picked up furniture lots to bid on.

He's got his eye on an historical item.

It's 1907, first edition, and it's a set of prints -

you'd probably recognise them - about the rules of cricket.

The estimate is £300 to £350.

I've got to buy it a lot below the estimate, so fingers crossed, but I'm not that hopeful.

He might be worried about the £300 price tag, but Mark's clearly bowled over by the cricket book.

Can he get it for a good price?

80. 90. 100. 110. 120 bid. 120 bid.

The Laws of Cricket, 120. 120.

140. 140 bid. At 140.

The Laws of Cricket at 140. 140.

160. £160 bid.

Selling at £160.

-6158.

-Fantastic. Well spotted, mate.

So, Mark's worries about the price of the book were unfounded, and he seems happy to have snapped it up.

Paul, meanwhile, is preparing himself to bid for the white £5 note.

From the Bank of England, a white £5 note, the white fiver.

£30 bid for that. At 30. 5.

£35 bid. 40. £40 bid. At 40.

I might have it. 40 quid. Great.

-40 the lot. At £40 bid. 40, the white fiver.

-That's enough.

-Selling at £40.

-Excellent.

-6157.

-He's just paid 40 quid for a fiver. What's that about?

-Hear Mark Franks speaking. What does he know?

-How much d'you reckon he'd give me for a tenner?

£40 for a £5 note - that's not bad, is it, actually?

No-one bid against him. I wonder why(!)

Oh, Mark might not be impressed, but it's another unusual item

that Paul's banking on to give him a good return.

And he's also hoping to bag himself the picture of the 19th Century jockey, Fred Archer.

Remember, it's got an estimate of £200 to £300.

260. 260 bid. 260. 270. 280. 280.

290. 300.

£300. The bidding has reached the top end of the estimate.

Paul's going mad. He's bidding on a donkey.

But he's still going!

360 bid. On the telephone, then. 360.

380. 380. He's come again. 380. 400.

-400.

-No.

-400.

Oh! £400. Didn't get that one today. Never mind.

Oh, dear. That's not the result that Paul was hoping for.

Mr Franks, meanwhile, has been playing the waiting game.

He's still got almost £500 to spend,

and he's gambling on buying some furniture lots at the end of today's auction.

First up is a Victorian chest of drawers with an estimate of £300 to £500.

220 with me on the book here. At 220 bid. 220 for that one.

At 220. 220? 250. 250 bid. At 250.

Good, clean chest at £250 bid. 250, and it's away and selling at £250.

-6158.

-250 quid.

That is a cracking chest of drawers.

Nice.

Delighted with that bargain, Mark's now got his sights on another piece of Victorian furniture.

This time it's a mahogany desk.

With just over £200 left in his kitty,

he needs to get it for the lower end of its £200 to £300 estimate.

180.

180. I'll go up in tens. At 180.

180. At £180 bid. At 180. 190.

190. 190. 190 bid. At 190 the lot.

At 190. 200. £200 bid. At 200.

Against you now at 200. 200. £200 I'm bid. 210.

210. 220. 220 bid.

At 220 the lot. At 220. 220. Bidder's far back, then, at 220.

And away and selling at £220.

6158.

That's an excellent last buy from Mark, and I think it's fair to say

he's quietly confident of winning today's competition.

There's hardly a dog left in this auction. We're on the very last lots.

I bought the chest of drawers behind me and the lovely desk,

and I've absolutely cleaned up by being patient. Well, I hope so.

Time will tell. Mr Hayes, watch out.

So, with today's auction done and dusted, it's time to find out who's hot and who's not.

Remember that our experts were allowed to spend up to £1,000 of their own cash.

Paul has been rather frugal and has spent just £525 on six items...

..whilst his opponent has spent £995 on seven items.

Mark might have outspent his rival, but remember that this contest is all about making the most profit.

But before our experts get down to the serious business of selling their items,

they're keen to get a closer look at their opponent's buys.

I'll show you what I bought. My favourite thing has to be this.

Look at that, three shamrocks in a box, solid silver.

-Birmingham, turn of the century, 1901.

-There you go.

Very nice. I like that a lot.

-What else?

-I bought a nice book on the Houses of Parliament, 1646.

-Sounds like a lot of money to me.

-I got carried away with some other bits. Let's see what you bought.

What is going on here? This is Only Fools and Horses!

-I quite like that, though!

-Here, Del Boy, look at that! Onyx.

All we need is a nice desk to put it on. Hey, nice desk, but my favourite item I bought today was this.

"We heal all wounds, save those of love." Isn't it charming?

I never knew you cared, Mark.

-It's very nice of you.

-You're not me type, Paul.

-You bought a white fiver for 40 quid.

-Exactly.

I'm going to offer you, right,

a brown tenner for just 20 quid.

Well may you scoff now, but that'll soon be worth 20 quid, the way inflation's going!

-I do like this furniture. They're lovely.

-Chest of drawers for two and a half.

-That's probably the best buy today.

-250 quid.

I have a theory - if it doesn't go in your pocket, don't buy it. There's a lot of work shifting that.

You've got to take that back to Battersea. You got a big roof rack? Good luck, mate!

Well, Paul might be all smiles now, but will he have the last laugh?

As he makes the short journey home and Mark begins the long trip back down south,

it's time to look in more detail at what they bought.

Once he gets home, Mr Franks will be selling...

a late Victorian silver stamp case,

a pair of silver spoons,

four golf clubs,

the monkey modelled on Paul,

a first-edition cricket book,

a Victorian mahogany desk

and the mahogany chest of drawers.

Paul, meanwhile, will be hoping to cash in on...

three silver shamrocks,

a pair of 19th Century Spode plates,

an 18th Century book of animals,

a 17th Century parliamentary chronicle,

the 19th Century onyx desk set

and a £5 note from 1949.

So, having gone head to head on Paul's home turf,

the boys are now readying themselves for the final part of today's challenge.

They need to make as much profit as they can from everything that they've bought.

The winner of today's contest will be the one who makes the most money for their chosen charity.

So, how do our experts plan to cash in on their purchases?

Welcome to London!

Six hours' drive from Penrith.

This is where it's at.

Now, I've got a van full of stuff that I bought at auction, and my plan

is to go and find the best dealers

that I know to sell this stuff to.

Well, it's a simple plan but it might not be a winning one,

because Mr Franks's rival has also got plenty of lots

that he'll be trying to sell on to make a profit.

Pretty much everybody Paul and Mark do deals with will be aware they're on a mission

to raise as much money as possible for charity, and our experts will be doing everything in their power

to persuade people to give them the best possible prices when they try to sell on their items.

They've both been working through their little black books,

putting deals together on the phone and by e-mail.

But until they've shaken on it and money's changed hands, no deal is truly sealed.

I've got some bits and bobs in the van - chest of drawers, desk - I'm going to go and show Helen Ricks.

Hopefully, she may be the buyer. She's a top dealer.

I've known her since I was a snotty-nosed kid, so hopefully I might get some profit from her.

Having paid £470 for the pair, Mark'll need a good price

if he's going to bank a return on the furniture.

I just unloaded these two beautiful items. Have a look, see what you think.

I'm amazed. Doesn't look like your normal stock. It's quite classy.

Thanks, Helen, you say all the nice things. What about that?

Three top drawers followed by four lower drawers. What do you reckon?

I do think it's actually a handsome piece -

a gentleman's piece of furniture, actually.

But now I'm going to find the problem so I can knock the price down.

Oh, don't start finding faults with it, Helen.

-Things like this - a bit of cock beading missing.

-Yeah, it's a pain.

And here, I'm afraid it looks like you've got an active worm or two.

Give it a squirt, fill it with wax.

I mean, the drawers are all sitting nice and true, they're not falling back. They all run nicely.

It's true, it is lovely.

-And what about the desk, Hel?

-Ooh!

Again, it's pretty, actually.

Imagine this in a big living room -

silver frames on top, pictures of the kids. I think this'd look fab.

I agree, it's a nice sort of honest bit of Victorian mahogany.

OK, nice and easy, £300 each, £600 the pair.

And you expect me to make a profit on that?

-Well, you only work on a small mark-up, Hel.

-I do.

But not that small! Er...

We are actually quite a way apart, I have to say.

Helen might work on a small profit margin,

but from the sound of things, Mark might have to as well.

Paul has been thinking hard about matching buyers to his items.

He's hoping he's found the perfect first pairing.

Ah! Now then, do you remember this desk set

that we got at Penrith, at the auction house?

Well, I rang a solicitor friend of mine.

This is exactly the sort of thing that he'd want.

I've sent him an e-mail of it, and he is interested, so wish me luck!

Remember that Paul paid £160 for the desk set,

so he's going to have to work hard to make a profit.

You've seen the photo, haven't you?

Yeah, you sent me an e-mail. I don't think the e-mail did it justice.

I think you're right, actually. This is ormolu, it's onyx and it's an ink stand.

-Where do you think it was made?

-It's French, and it's about 1880, 1900.

-Right.

-Is that the sort of thing you're interested in?

-I think so. That would be rather impressive, I think,

-on the conference table downstairs when the clients come in, yeah.

-If I asked you £220,

-how does that sound?

-A good deal, as long as you're happy.

-Shake on that?

-Absolutely fine.

-That's lovely. Thank you very much.

-Can we have a sealed letter, please?

-Yeah, definitely.

So the verdict's in.

Paul's guilty of making a good profit, and he's over the moon.

It's a win-win situation. I don't know what you're doing, Mark, but I'm doing all right.

Well, actually, Mark's having a bit of a tough time

selling his desk and chest of drawers, which cost him £470.

He asked his buyer, Helen, for £600, but she's not having any of it.

Five is nearer the mark.

Well, that'd mean 250 each.

This cost me 250. I do need to try and make a profit, so...

540?

520.

530.

No.

-525.

-No.

I'll go an extra 20, but honestly, Mark, it's just tough.

-I can't at the moment, so...

-520?

OK.

You're an angel. Helen... you have a deal.

-Thank you very much.

-Now, load it yourself.

-Oh!

-Ooh, that's nice(!) Whoever said chivalry's dead must have had dealings with Mark Franks.

He had to haggle hard for it, but he did manage to bank a £50 profit.

Mark is heading north again, but only north of the Thames.

He's sticking to his strategy of selling to dealers, but this time

in a slightly more glamorous location in the centre of London.

He's hoping to sell the silver stamp case, which cost £170.

-Daniel, how are you?

-Good morning! How are you?

-Nice to see you, sir.

I have an item which I've bought which I think may be of interest to you,

as you only sell interesting and wonderful pieces of silver.

-It is an interesting thing. Do you know what it is?

-A stamp case.

Well, looking at it, it's not, and I'll explain to you why.

-If you open it up, you have this space where you could quite easily slide a stamp.

-Yeah.

But if we read the inscription,

"We heal all wounds save those of love".

Isn't that lovely?

It's a lovely inscription, but what it's saying is "I'm a plaster case".

"We heal all wounds."

Now, looking at it,

it's made by William and George Neal,

well-known silversmiths, and it's just nice quality.

-Is it something you'd be interested in buying?

-I think I would be.

-If a dealer came in, it would be offered to me in the trade for about £250.

-Gosh. Right.

I don't think I'd want to pay any more than that.

I don't know if that shows you a profit or not.

-Number one, it shows me a profit.

-Well, that's a start.

There's nowhere else to go, so I'm going to accept your offer. You're a gentleman.

Thank you for thinking of me.

So the stamp case was in fact a plaster case,

which has stuck another 80 quid's worth of profit in Mark's kitty.

And feeling rather pleased with himself,

he's decided to put his feet up.

Got your work cut out here, mate.

BAGPIPE MUSIC PLAYS

Just like his rival, Paul is also heading north,

only he is REALLY going north, because in his quest to match buyers to his items,

he's travelled to Scotland, to one of the biggest antique dealers in the country.

-These are all Georgian pieces.

-These are all period Georgian.

Paul is hoping to sell his silver shamrocks

and luck must be on his side,

because although we're in Scotland, the manager is Irish.

With these being shamrocks, I saw these and thought of you.

Now, these are Birmingham, 1901,

hallmarked there - solid silver - but they were retailed in Belfast.

-OK.

-But a beautiful thing to have.

-Yeah, they're very nice.

We're not noted for our silver buying

but when you show me these three shamrocks, I think they're gorgeous.

I'll take one out and it's nice with the wee spikes at the end for either the menu or the name card.

Nice weight on them as well. They're not flimsy. They're nice, solid silver as you said.

I was hoping for around the £200 mark.

200... If I saw these individually,

I'd probably offer maybe around £50 for each one of the shamrocks.

-Right, OK.

-That's 150.

But the fact that they're in the original case,

which itself is a shamrock, I think it's great fun and nicely done.

I think that must add another £20 or £30.

I think my offer would be £180 for the box and its contents.

Sounds amazing. You'll have great pleasure with those. Shall we deal on that then? 180?

-Be great.

-I know time's ticking. Thanks very much.

-Thank you.

Well it looks like Paul's got the luck of the Irish today.

The shamrocks have given him another £80.

He banks £50 from the sale of his two Spode plates.

And £10 from the sale of his £5 note.

That's £50 that we can spend?

That's £50. I might even give you English money if you're good!

In the south of England, Mr Franks is on the trail of another potential sale.

He's tracked down a real dog lover and he's hoping to sell his silver spoons which cost him £70.

The Bulldog Club, I'm a president of.

It's our centenary in 2012.

What I'd like to do is probably donate the Crufts one for Best in Show

and this, the Birmingham one, for Best Opposite Sex.

-Sounds perfect.

-They would be ideal for me, yeah.

The only thing we've got to do now is the boring bit and talk about money.

I just thought 100 quid each. Nice and easy, £200 the pair - what d'you reckon?

I think you're trying to rip me off, to be honest.

I'm pushing my luck!

We're both south London, Glynn.

I've got to try hard.

What was you thinking?

I'd be quite happy to give 150 for them but not 200.

Fair enough. I think you've got yourself a deal. You're a gentleman.

£150 gives Mark an £80 profit.

And he's hoping to bank some cash by selling the Laws Of Cricket book,

which he bought at the auction for £160.

-160, possibly.

-Hmm...

Well, I could say 165 just to put you ahead of the game, but really...

Their estimate is far over the top.

-That's your final offer, John?

-That's the best I can do.

-We've got ourselves a deal. Thank you very much.

-Thank you.

Well it's not a big one but a profit's a profit.

Is it enough to give him a lead over his rival, though?

Thanks to a successful selling trip to Scotland,

Paul has made £550 worth of sales

and banked £200 profit, which is a very good return.

But not good enough to take the lead

as Mark has made £1,085 worth of sales

and pocketed profits of £215,

placing him in the lead.

Franksy still has two lots left to sell.

In an effort to secure another sale, he's hit the road

to try and conjure up a profitable deal.

# Hey, hey, we're the Monkees

# People say we monkey around... #

D'you remember the monkey? The small cute monkey?

I only bought it for a bit of fun because it reminded me of Paul!

A little northern monkey. How do you get rid of it?

How do you make it disappear and turn it into cash?

The answer is simple, my friend. You take it to a magician!

The magician in question is Doctor Bondini,

who expressed an interest in using the monkey in his act.

-This is something else, isn't it? Dr Bondini, I spoke to you on the phone.

-Hello. You did.

And I see you've got a pig, a duck and you've got an elephant.

So I'm sure that a monkey could be incorporated into one of your tricks.

-We could certainly use the monkey in the show.

-This monkey I've decided to call Paul.

Hello, Paul. Welcome to the magic show.

Look at the smile on his face.

I think he's at home in this place.

Dr Bondini sounds interested in adopting the monkey.

But can Mark seal a profitable deal?

In the capital, a stranger has arrived in town.

# Found myself in a strange town

# Though I've only been here for three weeks now

# I've got blisters on my feet... #

Continuing on his quest to make the perfect match between item and buyer,

Mr Morecambe has travelled to London to meet a vintage book dealer,

who might want to buy his animal book and his parliamentary chronicle.

We've got a straightforward history of the English Civil War.

It's an interesting book and it's rare as well.

The last copy at auction was in 1976.

-Never.

-30 years without one on the market through auctions.

On the other hand and against the rarity,

once you start to look through it, we start to find problems.

Unfortunately, I arrive here where there's the immediate difference.

There's a substantial chunk of text missing there.

From a dealer's point of view, a substantial amount of interest in the book sadly evaporates.

This one fascinated me,

cos it's all the birds and the animals and the fishing in Greenland and things like that.

-It's a fascinating book, isn't it?

-It is. It's fantastic for that. 1773.

-It actually remained in print until the 1970s.

-Really?

-Is this in pretty similar condition?

-It's almost complete.

The problem is that someone's taken a shine to the woodpecker

and the nuthatch at some point.

All that being said, is this something that you're interested in?

Paul might appreciate the history lesson, but he's on a profit-making mission

and what he really wants to know is whether or not the dealer is going to buy the books.

If he's going to win today's contest, he needs to make a decent profit.

After negotiating with Dr Bondini, Mark has some good news.

£25, turned into 80 quid.

That's magic!

Paul will look for a similar transformation

as he tries to strike a deal for his two books.

First up is the parliamentary chronicle, which cost him £130.

Would it be something that you're interested in buying?

Yeah. In fact, I think I have a collector who'd be pleased to, er...

see it. Because of that, I could probably offer you £160.

Excellent. I'd be happy with that. You're being very generous.

That's a real result for Paul, but if this visit to the capital

is going to have a happy ending,

he also needs to sell the vintage book of animals he paid £45 for.

I find it interesting and I like the book myself.

Sometimes that sways my judgment on what I should pay for things.

I'm the same, I'm afraid.

I think I'd be happy to pay a similar sum.

So if my maths, then, is correct,

that's 160 plus 160. That's £320.

-Shall we shake on that?

-Sure.

It's been absolutely a pleasure to meet you.

I wish you all the best for that. And that's great. Thank you very much.

£160 for the animal book is a roaring success

and piles the pressure on Mark.

Paul is all sold up and if his rival wants to win today's competition,

he needs to drive a hard bargain with the vintage golf clubs.

East Sussex, on the coast.

I could throw these clubs into the sea, we're so close.

This beautiful hotel is bang on the seafront.

Behind it is a golf course.

I've been on the phone and spoken to the guy that owns it, called James.

He's interested in seeing these golf clubs.

Let's go and see if we can get him to buy them.

Mark bought the golf clubs for £100,

but will they prove to be his match-winner or leave him feeling teed off?

I know you're right next to a golf club.

I know you're right next to the beach and it doesn't get a lot better.

I've brought you four golf clubs.

-Right.

-They're all hickory shaft and at least 100 years old.

They're quite hard to date exactly.

You've got two drivers and this one is quite interesting.

It's a putting clique, which is just slightly before the regular putters.

You could use it in other places. It's says "special" on there and I think it is quite special.

Quite a collectible set. Would you have any interest? Anything you can do with them?

I think they need some loving care and attention.

-I know how they feel, James.

-Yeah?

THEY CHUCKLE

Yes, I think...

as a display piece, maybe memorabilia of times gone by...

How about if we said a couple of hundred quid for the four?

-£200 for the four?

-If you say it quickly, it doesn't sound like a lot of money, does it?

-They need some gentle refurbishment, don't they?

-Yes, that's true.

Well, £200 would double Mark's money but although he's interested,

there's no guarantee that his buyer will be prepared to pay that amount.

We'll find out very shortly if he was able to seal the deal.

But right now it's time to tot up the totals and find out how much profit our rivals have made.

Mark and Paul each had a budget of up to £1,000.

Remember that Franksy spent £995 of his kitty,

while Mr Morecambe spent just £525.

As they've been working hard to raise money for charities,

the auctioneer kindly offered to waive commission on their purchases.

It's been a titanic tussle today so without further ado,

it's time to bring our antiques warriors together

to reveal who is today's Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is champion.

Hey! Hello, Mark. All right, mate?

-Yes, great, thank you.

-River Thames.

-Yeah.

-Central London.

TOWER Bridge. Not London Bridge.

I think I've just seen Dick Van Dyke. "Strewth, Mary Poppins!"

-It's 40,000 feathers on a "frush's froat".

-What are you talking about?

-I'm practising my cockney.

-Anyway!

-Ready to see how we done?

-Go on.

-All right.

-Shall we do it together?

-On the count of five. Ready?

Five, four, three, two, one, go!

-£345.

-£330.

Oh, you beat me by 15 quid!

-£15? That's amazing, isn't it?

-That's really close. Really close.

-That's really close.

-You know what 15 quid'd get you in London?

-Go on.

Two lovely cups of coffee. I'll treat you, come on.

-Sounds good. Know what it'd get you in Morecambe?

-No.

-Bed and breakfast.

-No way.

So, it's a narrow victory for Paul.

Despite his best efforts, Mark was only able to make a £60 profit on his golf clubs.

He came up slightly short.

£150?

-How about a tenner more? 160.

-Done deal.

I felt I tried really hard and if he beat me by 15 quid,

I'm a little bit gutted cos I could've pushed a bit harder on each item.

Just a couple of quid would have made all the difference but I think I tried as hard as I possibly could.

So, Paul won, fair and square.

I'm absolutely delighted to beat Mark by £15.

What a small margin that is, but it makes a big difference to the show, doesn't it?

I'm absolutely delighted.

It's really what I expected. I go to lots of auctions, so, er... Result!

Well, Paul might have beaten Mark by a nose but both our experts have worked round the clock

and all the profits will be going to their chosen charities.

Paul D'Auria Cancer Support Centre is local to where I live in Battersea

and I know the 330 quid will go a long way with that small charity.

I choose the RNLI cos I do live near the coast

and I know people who have boats and you never know when you're going to need them.

They're purely a voluntary organisation and in my view, they're priceless.

345 quid - whatever they do with it, good luck to them.

Mr Morecambe might have beaten his southern rival on his home turf,

but this contest is far from over.

Tomorrow our duelling duo will be going head to head again -

this time at a UK antiques market.

Now then, do you know what? I think I have found THE piece de la resistance.

I've spotted something in your van.

I'm going to do you a little favour. I'm going to buy it and get rid of that rusty old clock.

Oh, is that right?

You know what? I am so excited today. I think I've found a wonderful painting.

This really could be a show stopper.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

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