04/09/2014 The One Show

Thursday, 4th September, 2014, two the One Show to talk about my

diaries. I have made it clear I will not take part in any tomfoolery just

to flog the book. Are you OK, Mr Pailin? I will be with you. Welcome

to Thursday's the One Show. And Dave four of our music festival we have a

performance from one of Britain's brightest young stars. Sam Smith

this just 22 and he is already a global superstar. He will be singing

his latest hit life for us before the end of the show. First, a man

with a few more stamps in his passport than Sam, but can he sing?

Yes he can! Yes, he can. It's Michael Palin! How are you, Michael?

I am very well. I have been into the back legs of a tiger, a lion, and

now a camel. Why do I always get the back legs? Because I have no sense

of smell! It is where the power is. This week is about promoting good

music. On your travels around the world, you must have encountered

some pretty dismal stuff. What is the worst thing you have had to

listen to and pretend to enjoy? There was a particular style of

music in Lapland, in northern Sweden. They all said around in the

tent. It is a vocal thing. They would not do it for quite a long

time. We had to wait for two hours. They have a drink and wait for

another two hours. Eventually you hear them start about midnight. I

was convinced they were setting us up completely. It took about eight

hours to film this strange sound like someone being violently ill.

Tonight we are aiming to track down anybody who has met Michael on his

travels, whether it is close to home or in far flung places. We are keen

to hear from this gentleman seen here with Michael let's if you are

that man, please get in touch, we would love to hear from you. Or his

mate! Do send in your pictures from your encounters with Michael to the

e-mail address. There is plenty of travelling today. We will take a

climb to the top of one of Scotland's most beautiful and X --

inaccessible pics. And we will hear about a mountain that has sprung up

in Kent. Michael, you will want to include it in your series. A couple

of months ago we shall do this... And 18,000 tonne mountain of rubbish

which has loomed over this street and the people who live in it for

the last four years. The dust is never ending. We get huge amounts of

flies, rats running around. We haven't been able to open the doors

or the Windows four years. Since our first film was broadcast, there have

been some developments. The operator, the company called Waste

For Fuel, have left the site. The Environment Agency moved on and they

have removed 1500 tonnes of waste to the fire brigade could make the site

safe as the rubbish have started catching fire. So, I am going in.

Last time I could not get next to the dump. Being right on it, it is

absolutely revolting, disgusting. There is a lot of plastic. There is

a bit of so far, loft in show elation. There is a fetid puddle.

What is unbelievable is the stinky mess is right behind these houses.

While there are 15,000 tonnes of it left, it seems like no one is

willing to get rid of it any time soon. There are 2 million reasons.

Because the removal of this much waste could cost up to ?2 million

and take months, there is still no decision on what is going to happen

to it. The Environment Agency is reluctant to spend any more public

money, saying the clean-up should be down to the company or the land over

-- landowner. Waste For Fuel say they have been locked out and have

no money to clear it up anyway. As for the landowner, 81 new old Alan

Beazley next door... It is strange that I should come into it at all.

Mr Beazley agrees that he owns the land's freehold but as he least

about six years ago he should not be made to play -- pee. It must make

you anxious? More angry than anxious. We asked for an interview

but they declined. The director said it had no income to operate or

service its liabilities. This may not be the firm's only liability.

The company has been accused of abandoning even more rubbish. I am

on my way to Chatham docks in the Medway area of Kent. That is 23

miles away from Waste For Fuel's site. This pile of refuse has been

here for a year. Andrew is a local councillor. There are thousands of

tonnes of waste abandoned in the docks by Waste For Fuels. I do not

want this to be like Orpington. I want to see the Environment Agency

take responsibility and get it removed. Are you confident that in

the near future this is going to be clear? Not at this stage. The

Emperor -- Environment Agency told us it is investigating ref use at

Chatham docks. Shelley from Waste For Fuel told us that while she is

aware of some refuse there she is aware not if it belongs to her

company or not. Life next to the dump is still as rubbish as ever.

You feel so sorry for the people in the houses. Our coffee table has

been replaced with a massive map and on here we have got all of the

journeys you have made over the years with the BBC. It is

incredible. It is like different coloured spaghetti. In your new

book, you cover three of those juries. You have your diary entries

from Pole to Pole, Full Circle and Around the World in 80 Days. It is

difficult to pick a certain spot to go back to but which journey would

you like to relive? Out of the three you mentioned, I would do Full

Circle around the Pacific again because it covers the area of going

through Peru, which is extraordinary. You start at Lake

Kitty Kafka and then go on to the railway, and then Machu Picchu. Most

people get the bus back but we went on, did white-water rafting through

a dangerous stretch of river, and into the Amazon. That stretch of

Peru, as an adventure, it was great. It is great to look at these

journeys, but what are you like now as you are a a little bit older. Do

you stuff have the urge to travel? It is one of those things. It is an

addiction, it is always there. Making the programmes is a wonderful

way to see the world because not only with a BBC paying me to do it,

but there was a small team, only six of us, and we made the decisions as

to what to shoot each day. We started early and finished late and

worked really hard and saw fantastic places. Travelling in a tour group

would not have been the same. You have a little chapter there, or you

were concerned. Even though they were a roaring success, you were so

unsure that you were the right man for the job. Yes, in Around the

World in 80 Days. You say, occasionally, the realisation that

this project is supported on my shoulders and demands not just my

survival but my energy, exuberance and enthusiasm, terrifies me. It

always happens at the start of anything I do, I always question

whether I will be able to do it and do it well. That is the thing. I can

get by but you want to make it special, as good as it possibly can

be. I was on this boat three days I was on this boat three days out of

England, and I suddenly got the feeling, what am I going to talk

about? There is no script, and what am I going to be like? I am readily

acting or will it be me saying my own thoughts? I thought it would be

boring. It was like I was thrown into it and halfway down the cliff

before hitting the sea below. You suddenly gained confidence that

those moments just develop. We asked you for one of your favourite

moments and you told us to dig out this clip, which is fantastic cost

up you are en route to Mumbai and you meet one of the locals and give

him his first experience of Bruce Springsteen. Is that all right? Full

volume. Are you all right? Are you all right in there? He loved it. He

was just great. He did not share my language, but in the seven days we

were on the boat, we got to know each other so well. As we got off

the boat in Mumbai, he just stepped forward and gave me a great hug. It

was one of the best forward and gave me a great hug. It

ever experienced. It is what Rus rings thing does! -- Bruce

Springsteen does! There were so many wonderful insights in your book,

Travelling To Work, which is out next week. The world has moved on

Travelling To Work, which is out lot since Michael made these

journeys and things seem to be changing faster than ever

journeys and things seem to be current turmoil in the

journeys and things seem to be the maps keep up?

Times Atlas who made this one have Times Atlas who made this one have

Here in Edinburgh, the National library of Scotland has a collection

of 2 million maps. Some of them are over 600 years old.

of 2 million maps. Some of them are at them I can quickly see how our

view of the world has changed over the centuries. Here you will find

one of the most iconic books in history. When it

one of the most iconic books in it is recognised as the benchmark of

excellence. It is the times it is recognised as the benchmark of

Comprehensive Atlas Of The World and this month, they published

Comprehensive Atlas Of The World and 14th edition. It weighs a tonne!

Comprehensive Atlas Of The World and When it was first published in

1895, When it was first published in

engraved each detail by hand, When it was first published in

time-consuming and took 15 years to When it was first published in

complete. I am taking a closer look at the copperplate. What jumped out

to me is that it is all in reverse. at the copperplate. What jumped out

It is amazing. Everything has to be done as a mirror image, back to

front. In the further decades there were advances but the skill of hand

scribing remained. The skill of scribing was still the most common

way to create maps until the 1990s. A map of this size could have taken

100 hours to complete. These days maps are created by a

100 hours to complete. These days with a click of a mouse. With

advances in computer and digital technology, maps can be created in a

fraction of the time and provide the stunning end results we see today.

Given that some societies, like China and India, they are growing so

rapidly, how do you look out for changes? We consult a variety of

sources. Their's journals, governmental sources, we scour the

media to see what is happening, and we have a cartographic digital

database which means we can update it as quickly as possible, almost to

the second. Given it what is going on in the world these days, Heidi

represent disputed territories like Ukraine and the Middle East? -- how

do you represent? They are represented by a broken line. Crimea

is represented as a disputed territory. The broken line

represents the dispute in the border. Given that you do everything

click of a mouse and most of us, if we want to access something we go to

a search engine and find something in seconds, how many people actually

use this Atlas? Is the atlas still relevant? It is usually relevant. It

is a snapshot of the world as it is today in 2014. Online there are lots

of conflicting views. You're not sure of what your sourcing is

accurate. We are spending a lot of time making sure the information is

as accurate as possible. You cannot travel the world with this! It might

take up your luggage allowance but it is a great Atlas to dream about

travel is and to plan your travel. I like that phrase, dreaming about

travel. We are joined by another man who is getting to see a lock of the

world. It is singer and songwriter Sam Smith. Good to have you. We were

watching the maps and a stuck your head in every country were your

album has charted and it is incredible. Does a big head mean it

has gone global? This is crazy. Can I keep it? Put it in your pocket.

You have got to go to all these places. To thank them personally. It

is odd to look at it like this. Incredible success. We have worked

it out, you are 50 years apart. When is your date of birth? 1992. In May.

I was May 1943. But I can't sing, you can. Can you remember where you

work on the day Sam was born? I would be travelling probably. We

have got your diary. You were in the North Pole and you had a bit of a

tricky time. Oh, yes. On my birthday? Yes, on your birthday. We

were dropped from a plane, well, the plane landed and we landed on an ice

flow and it was late in the season and we should not have landed. You

are quite afraid of flying. Yes, I am scared. How do you get over it? I

try and drink. I tell the stewardess when I get on, so they will be nice

to me. It is getting better slowly, but I feel like I am going to die.

You have just come back from the States and all the stars made a

beeline to have their picture taken with you. We start with Katy Perry.

And we have Miley Cyrus. And Beyonce. That was the one. She said

your voice was like butter. I have watched it every year and when they

told bit I was going to meet her, I was almost sick. She was amazing.

Maybe you could sing with her? That would be great, but I think that I

am done, that was the best thing in my life. I am doing a tour all over

the UK. I will be in Crawley on Sunday. We are going to hear your

new single very shortly. Before that, Andy Torbet has been to one of

the toughest ascents in Scotland. The towering mountains of Scotland

are a mecca for adventurous and many are especially interested in taming

the highest and the wildest of the peaks, those over 3000 peaks, the

Munros. The list ended up being almost 300

peaks long. The tables since then have been a tick list for anyone

wanting to try every single one. But one stands out from the rest, the

most difficult of them all. It is named the inaccessible pinnacle.

That is where I am headed. The sheer difficulty of it has proved one of

the biggest challenges to those trying to complete Munro's list.

Even Sir Hugh Munro himself never made it to the top. Steve Fallon

holds the world record. I will just go to the summits and take them off.

He has been to every one of them 15 times. It is a 2 and half hour climb

to get to the base. Prior to the 1890s people thought there were only

30. Munro studied maps and the Victorian maps were not very

accurate, so he decided to climb them all to be certain. He employed

a little instrument like this, it is a little barometer. It is similar to

the one he would have used. It is looking at the pressure and as you

climbed up, it would tell him what height he was at. At the moment it

says 3000 feet. Mountain ranges may have several points above 3000 feet,

and not each peak qualifies as a separate mountain. You can see the

difference. That is a Munro. To the right it has got a bit of a rise,

not enough to be a mountain. He found there were 538 peaks in total

and 283 were distinctive mountains and they were called Munros. There

are two distinct peaks on the same mountain and only the highest is a

Munro. In the case of this particular hill, Munro made an

important decision. Even the entropy in rock sticking on the site is 20

feet higher. As Munro was only a moderate client he never made it to

the summit of the pin. You can understand why somebody like Sir

Hugh Munro with limited climbing experience would have found this,

especially in bad weather, a serious proposition. The Munro tables were

revised in 1921 to list the end pin in its own right, so it has to be

done by people who like to bag them all. For an experienced rock climate

it is relatively straightforward. But for most hill walkers it can be

challenging. Of course, any attempt by Sir Hugh Munro would have been

harder because of his boots. I am not roped up because I am confident

of my ability, but I strongly recommend safety gear if you try to

attempt it. It becomes a bit eerie when it is like this. Even the first

man to bag every Munro, Reverend Archibald Robertson, left the end

pin until the last. He climbed it in 1905. The top, finally. This is one

Munro I can take off. It is a bit intermittent with the clouds, but

when you get a gap, you get that or some of you. One Munro himself never

made is amongst the most spectacular.

Well done. And congratulations for the crew getting up there as well!

We asked for photos if you had bumped into Michael and we have got

We asked for photos if you had a few. Heavily sent this one in. It

is in 2006. That was a big year for you because Jim Campbell is here

with you at a book signing in Glasgow.

with you at a book signing in one-man tour, this is all about the

diaries? It is based on the diaries. Half the tour is about travel, the

other half is about comedy, how I got into comedy. A shy boy in

Sheffield gets got into comedy. A shy boy in

time you were on stage was at the O2 got into comedy. A shy boy in

Arena and you have recovered? Yes, my head is still in the cloud a

Arena and you have recovered? Yes, little bit. The nicest time I spent

with the patience for a long time. It has been a pleasure to have you

as always. Tickets for the tour are available now. Tomorrow we are back

with Robert Plant. Now it is time for Sam Smith. You can see the whole

set by pressing the red button at the end of the show. He is kicking

off with I'm Not The Only One. You and me, we made a vow.

For better or for worse. For months

on end I've had my doubts. But I know that I

still need you here. Cos you don't think I

know what you've done. Even

though Lord knows you kept mine. Cos you don't think I

know what you've done. You've made me realize

my deepest fear. Cos you don't think I

know what you've done. Cos you don't think I

know what you've done.