11/09/2013 The One Show

Hello, welcome to the One Show with Alex Jones and Matt Baker.

Tonight's guest does have world class whiskers, looks good in black

lad and likes a big sloppy kiss. We could not get the sea lion so

please welcome Bill Bailey! You must have kissed plenty of animals.

Yes, I have. That was not the question I was anticipating. We

have got a lot of animals in our house. You end up, in a moment of

emotion, you might give a little peck on the whiskers. Do you have a

parrot? We have several. Birds, they will touched their peak to

your lips. It is quite sweet. Hello, Molly, they say. She is a parrot.

Last week pile up on the Isle of Sheppey crossing in Kent has

highlighted that we are at the time of year when fog can be an issue.

Later, we have advice on how to drive safely in fog. Carrie Grant

goes on an interesting journey. Martin Lewis will tell us how to

get the best interest rates on savings accounts. If you want to

get any interest, the first step is to make sure your money is safe.

Do not panic. I am not stealing this. It is a fake cash machine. It

is called Anthony and I'm planting him on a busy high street in London

because attempts to steal bank cards and pin numbers have trebled

in the past year. This is the latest attempt to raise awareness

of the crime among the public. We no cash machine fraud exists. We

have been told what to look for. Why does it keep happening? Fraud

have been told what to look for. at the cash machine is profitable,

often run by organised gangs. These are fitting a skimming device to

this one, to read card details and record pin numbers and steal your

cash. They were caught and convicted. The police say they have

to remain one step ahead of criminals. Together with the

banking industry, may have come up with this pretend cashpoint machine

with extra features. They are designed to look like a normal

machine. They have something in there that they can take the data

from a card. That will slot into there that they can take the data

the cash machine. What is this? It is a camera. It looks rough and

ready. If you open it, you will find inside it is a simple camera.

In a vice or that, I would suspect it. There has been a camera bar on

this all of the time. We are filming now. It is that? And it has

a pinhole. There is nobody behind me so I do that. It is clear. To

read again while you cover it up with your other hand. -- do it

again. A careful are we when we draw money? We are using Anthony to

find out. It is obvious the machine is not real. It is hollow. The sign

is handwritten. Bits of it come off in your hand. And the wire, out the

back, leads up here, into the shop a bar. Do you think anyone can be

fooled? So we hide in the shadows and wear it. Some seem curious.

Some are not convinced. But the first people are retracted. We are

from the One Show. First thing, it is plugged into the shop. There is

a handwritten sign. That comes off. Your card is inside! Where else

would it be? I am embarrassed. There is couple spotted something

would it be? I am embarrassed. was not right. Sorry to bother you,

can we have a word? You did not put your card in. That came away. It

looks dodgy. Despite it looking dodgy, customers kept rolling in.

You put your card in? Yes. I was not looking. It looked odd, but

then I thought I would try it. The his people were not horrified at

being fought. If this was a scam we could have got away with it --

fooled. The vast majority of cash by machines are safe but we need to

take more responsibility to keep ourselves and our money saved.

That is scary. Martyn Lewis, the money-saving expert is with us. I

imagine you have a routine around a money-saving expert is with us. I

cash machine. If it is stand-alone, do not go near. Supermarkets, you

can see everybody's pin number. People do not hide them. I call it

the four finger system. You put your hand over and I put four

fingers on keys that do not represent the number I am pressing

necessarily. It is more different - - difficult for people to see what

you are pressing. I feel awkward about hiding my pin number. That is

a terrible British thing. Do not feel that you are rude. Hide your

pin number. If everybody does it, you will not feel awkward. Just

because he looks honest, he could be trying... I could be a Ford

staff. I hide the pin number from myself! -- fraudster. Other big

news this week is that there is an investigation into banks and

building societies because of a rates where banks offer a high

interest accounts and bring the interest rate down a year later.

They say it is a trick. You disagree. No money, I agree with

the regulator. Some people want these to be banned, which would be

detrimental in the low interest rate environment. We used to call

them bonus rates. There was a savings account available that paid

2.5% of the interest rate which was a bonus last in a year. If you have

an account, it is variable, they can drop it, they could Tropic next

week and that happens. With this rate -- trumpet. With this rate, it

is a minimum rate guarantee. It cannot drop below the amount and

that savings account is still the best by now because while it can

drop, nothing else is paying more. I look for accounts with a decent

bonus rate. Of course, you have to be ready to switch. This is new. It

is made from polymer fibre. Thanks for your advice. I would keep that!

The man from the Bank of England is following me! We have entered the

season when fog can cause problems on the roads. Look at the accident

that happened in Kent last week. Thankfully, no one was killed. But

it is awful when you drive into fog. There are things you can do to get

through it safely. This is Carrie Grant.

Eddie rain, high winds, weather conditions that can make driving

potentially dangerous. There is one phenomenon drivers do not seem to

be able to handle well. Fog. The initial reports suggest 30 cars

were involved. I grabbed my child and we ran as fast as we could. The

130 vehicles were involved. 30 people were taken to hospital. Ms

drivers adjust their behaviour and know they should slow down. I am

riding in similar conditions faced by those motorists who crashed in

fog last week. I am doing it in an advanced simulator. They are coming

in close. We are going at 30 and it feels fast. That really has got

four key. I have to go at ten miles per hour to see the lorry -- foggy.

This is the Transport Research Laboratory that investigates

accidents. They have discovered that fog affects the driver in an

unexpected way, which is very shocking. When people hit bad

weather conditions they slowdown and they are more vigilant. They

put the lights on. What can happen to many is that we can get used to

it. When you have been driving in fog, you might speed up. So some of

our speed up? We do not have the view out of the window. There is no

visual clue to say that you wondering whatever that speed might

be. Rather than leaving the house and at putting the fog lights on,

it is constantly evaluating, not concentrating on the car in front.

The worst thing is to follow everybody else assuming Bano what

they are doing. Assess the risk and drive accordingly. I feel that fog

is mesmerising and you are transfixed on the road, not looking

at your speed. Different people do different things. Some people do

not look at the dials and overcompensate, focusing ahead of

them. That is not great because you cannot see, you have lost a lot of

side vision. The clues you would have about speed you are travelling.

Recognise what speed you are doing and slowed down. Also if you are

driving in a rural environment, in a town, and you are at a junction,

turn the radio down, open the window, can you hear the traffic?

Use everything available to you to window, can you hear the traffic?

drive safely. And make sure you know how to turn on your fog lights.

Most -- many people do not know where they are.

What is scary is that people react differently. Everybody is confused.

Wind the window down so that you can hear the traffic. I never put

my headlights on either. You listen? It is just what I do.

Everything refracts. This is a strange show we have had money in a

glass of wine. Qualmpeddler, you are back on tour. Does your father

come to these? He is 82? He likes comedy. My dad, his comedy was The

Goons. He likes left of centre, D. He will give me the odd word of

advice. -- comedy. Do as he like the television showed their Killing.

You talk about it on stage. It is in Danish apart from the odd word.

There was a scene in the police station. The subtitle said thanks

for the coffee, SPEAKS IN DANISH. When they find the body. SPEAKS

WORDS SIMILAR TO ENGLISH. And last week, I was performing in

Sweden, and even they were saying, yes, that is how it is. You have got

a lovely set there. It is very flamboyant. That is the deluxe

a lovely set there. It is very version of my show. It is not the

whole of the second leg, just one at the end. I am not counting forests

around the whole of Britain. No, I have got grass on the stage, which I

always wanted to have, as it looks great, trees and lights and

shrubbery. It is very rural. And later, I will tell you exactly how I

drive on stage. This show, you try to keep it as topical as possible,

so what do you make of Alan scared, the founder of UKIP, leaving to

start his own party? Did he not say he thought UKIP was getting too

extreme? I think that is true. I think UKIP had a bit of a burst of

extreme? I think that is true. I attention, because of Nigel Farage,

he seems like this jolly chap, you always see him with a pint, but as

soon as anybody tried to examine their policies, everything fell

apart, because they did not have one. I talk about this in the show.

Policy, do we have one? ! Sort of like, no women in the bar area, and,

smoking in hospitals, that will do. So, I can understand it, I imagine

he is horrified. Let's look at entertainment news. Obviously,

strictly come dancing is the big thing at the minute. Is it? !Would

you ever appear on it? I will tell you what, I would, if aliens were

holding the world to ransom, and one of their conditions for the release

of the world was that I appeared on X Li. I know it is not very likely,

but then, I might go, all right, then. So, there is a chance, is what

you are saying. Let's not tell him we have done it. Done what? !

Doesn't matter. Anyway, you can see Bill on tour, going all around the

country. It is not a coastal tour! It is me on a dinghy, and fishing

boats! Do it, then! We know that you love creatures great and small, as

we spoke about at the beginning. Yes, I do, I love this table, it is

like a Perspex rib cage of a massive wail. And you either like the creepy

Crawley ones. Yes, we have got a lot of insects in our house. Some

friends of ours came to dinner, and their present was six Madagascan

cockroaches. I said, quite rightly, normally, people bring a bottle of

wine, but they are marvellous pets, actually, and the hissing bit is

true. You are going to love this, in your honour, we have sent George

McGavin to meet the daddy of them all. This ferocious looking beetle

would not seem out of place in a tropical jungle, but it is in fact a

home-grown is dag beetle. It mainly lives in gardens across south-east

England. It is the biggest British beetle, and one of the most

beautiful. Being so big, you would think they would be easy to study,

but in fact, they lead incredibly secret lives. They have got huge

antlers, which are actually modified mouthparts, but don't worry, they

cannot bite. The adults do not use their jaws for feeding. In fact, the

adults hardly feed at all. One of the eating is done by the larvae.

Stag beetle larvae spend up to seven years hidden underground, munching

through rotten wood and building up fat reserves to power their adult

lives. When they finally emerge, they only live for about six weeks.

Their sole purpose in life during that short time is to find a mate,

so eating is the last in on their mind. I have come to royal Holloway

University of London to meet a specialist, who has spent 13 years

understanding the detail of their extraordinary lives, starting with

the larvae. They rub their legs together, on one leg, they have

ridges, and on the other leg, little teeth. They move their legs

backwards and forwards across those which is. It is a bit like bagging

your fingernail over a piece of coal. That's right. We can just

stick this down the side, and let's see if they make a noise. At first,

this one does not seem too keen to speak to me. General rule with

watching wildlife is that when you want them to do something, they

never do. There it is. It is a really clever trick, when you are in

darkness, feeding underground, to make noises, to tell your mates

where you are, or not to come to close. Debra's latest findings have

revealed that it is not just stag beetle larvae which operate in the

dark. To find out more about that, we need to look at the beetles in

a. She has discovered that adult stag beetles are far more active at

night than anybody had realised. So, I have brought a specially modified

camera, with infrared lights, so that we can see them, but they

cannot see us. It shows how important their sense of smell is,

because they they are relying on their antennae. Females release a

pheromone which males can detect across several gardens. Once he has

found her, he does something quite surprising. The mail is using his

mandibles to hold the females still, putting them over her

shoulders. I always thought the mandibles were only used to fight,

but clearly, they have a very important secondary function. All

the time they are making, the male, he has got tiny hairs, he is

touching the female, tasting the female's head. All of this is going

on in pitch darkness, but through our specialist cameras, we are

getting a unique glimpse into the world of the. Beetle I am absolutely

amazed, I have never seen it in this light. This one is a much bigger

male. The smaller mail has been bullied away, but is not giving up

that easily. Here is the other one coming back. I have never seen this,

ever, in my life. The this.This is fantastic. But while egg antlers are

handy in battle, being big is not necessarily best. He cannot quite

hold her with his mandibles, as the other one could, so, a really big

male has not got much of an advantage when it comes to mating,

because he cannot keep his lady where he wants him. It has been

wonderful to witness these not turn up antics. We might be in a

laboratory, but just imagine, all of this drama and passion is being

played out under cover of darkness in back gardens all over the

south-east of England. Very intimate. But it was a good film. A

brilliant exhibition is coming back to the Natural History Museum. Yes,

And It Is A Showcase For Fantastic Images, Some Of Which We Have Here.

. This Is Two Very Wet Looking Lions In The Serengeti. They are not as

miserable as they look, because they can actually lick the rainwater off

each other. It is a majestic shot. . This one is off the

each other. It is a majestic shot. . This one is off coast of Egypt,

hoovering up seagrass by the bucket load. It is amazing. And this one is

called the race for life, a jaguar after its favourite prey, the

largest rodent in the world. In this case, it escapes, as it usually

does, but one out of ten, they get crunched. And we have got a

wonderful portrait of you, George, . She is called Dora, she is a

four-year-old orangutan orphan in Sumatra. We have been filming for a

3-part series on BBC One, all about primates all over the world. That,

for me, is wonderful. You are a patron of that very course. Indeed.

It is time to add more names to the mix of great British people who you

can vote into the National portrait Gallery. And it is the turn of two

women who are equally deserving. Barbara Windsor, Faerie Queene of

acting, and a true East End. Born near here, in Shoreditch, she is as

British as they come, as British as a cup of tea, fish and chips or

Christmas pantomime. Oh, yes she is. Known as the archetypal dolly bird,

she starred in nine carry on films. The first one was Carry On Camping.

When you think of her, you get a smile on your face. You just think,

Barbara Windsor is here, everything is good to be all right. With such

effervescence, some might underestimate her as an actress, but

don't. She has been nominated for a BAFTA, and also for a Tony award,

for her Broadway appearance in Oh, What A Lovely War! Away from the

razzmatazz of showbiz, Barbara Windsor has proved she really has

razzmatazz of showbiz, Barbara got a heart of gold. I got it for

services to entertainment, and actually, Amy would help Barbara

with her lines for EastEnders, but Amy would have to be Peggy Mitchell.

For 16 years, we watched her cat fights, her affairs, her battle with

breast cancer. I am not some cuddly little old lady. I am Peggy

Mitchell, I am old East End. Her irrepressible personality and

trademark volcanic larva have made sure that she is one of the most

recognisable faces - and voices - in the country.

Dame Jocelyn is a pioneering campaigner for racial equality. For

60 years, she has demonstrated total commitment to fight for, influence

and encourage opportunities for others, particularly black women,

like myself. As a 29-year-old, arriving in 1950s Britain, she came

face-to-face with racial discolouration. They are not

clean... Not prepared to tolerate the prejudiced, she helped to found

the Campaign Against Racial Determination, which saw it become

illegal to prejudice against anybody based on the colour of their skin.

The strength and courage that Dame Jocelyn showed at that time was

quite incredible. We should not underestimate that she was a black

woman in a white male dominated world. As a senior teacher, she

pioneered the introduction of multicultural education in the

1960s. Her impact on British culture through her work in universities and

schools how the light up to the United Kingdom and made Britain look

at itself. She helped make the kind of society that we live in now. Dame

JOcelyn Barrow should be a role model to us all, having dedicated

her life to fight for equality for everyone, encouraging individuals to

do their best, make a difference, and, like her, never give up on a

dream of a better future. Now, there are 12 nominees, and you can vote

for your favourite when the lines open on Friday. But if you want see

them all now, you can go to The One Show website. Earlier in the show,

we were talking about the best way to drive

You were listening closely when we talked about driving in fog. I was

trying to say do not drive with headlines on full beam. I was not

saying I did not drive without headlights! On tomorrow's show, Sir

Terry