17/11/2015 The One Show


17/11/2015

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Well, hello, welcome to The One Show with Alex Jones. And Matt Baker. We

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won't be struggling for chat tonight because our guest is the chatty and

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man on telly. If we need to get a word in edge ways, Justin Bieber has

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the secret! Open your mouth! LAUGHTER

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Please welcome Alan Carr! Hello, my love. Nice to see you. We have the

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blindfold if we needed! With God and all! That is the first time you seen

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that because you never see an episode. I never watch myself, I

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hate the way I sound and look. Even at award shows when you are

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nominated and they say, let's have a little clip, I am like this! I can't

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stand it. We will warn you when we play some clips, coming up, don't

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worry. And also tonight Mike has gone to unbelievable lengths to

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capture rare footage of the deer rut. I'm very much looking forward

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to seeing that. Before that we have to turn our attentions to the fact

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that with less than two hours before kick-off Jiminy's friendly football

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match against the Netherlands has been cancelled tonight due to

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security concerns. But the England versus France friendly will go ahead

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at Wembley. Ewan is there. People want to show their support because

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thousands of tickets for the match sold, over the weekend, after the

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attacks. They certainly did. It is all about support. Programmer crew

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would not normally report from a sporting occasion but this is not

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wooden again, there's no mention of four will start up front for

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England, people don't seem to care about the result, there is no talk

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of who will win. It's all about solidarity and wanting to show

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support for France. There were concerns of the weekend but people

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might stay away but 10,000 extra tickets were sold since those

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horrific scenes in Paris at the weekend. Everyone I have spoken to

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just wants to beat you. They'd want to see an empty seat, even people

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not massively into football want to be sure to show support France.

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Their national anthem will be played on the big screen this evening and

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England manager Roy Hodgson has urged the England fans to get

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involved and try to sing the French national anthem. I think it is a

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wonderful gesture. I walked around the streets in Wembley earlier and I

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spoke to all sorts of fans from both sides. The overwhelming feeling that

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I got was love and support for each other. If they are anything to go

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by, kick-off time will be very special indeed.

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People in Paris are not cowering at home, they are filling the streets

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of Paris, in defiance and solidarity. Should this match go

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ahead? We've all got to stand together, show that we are against

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terrorism and show we are not scared. We must all stand against

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them because this is not Muslim, not any kind, this is only stupid,

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crazy, sick people. Can I ask, up to 5p per minute, you realise the

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English fans have been asked to sing the French national anthem? It is

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good. When the anthem is saying we are all French. -- when the anthem

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is signed, we are all French. SINGING IN FRENCH. We can only get

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better! Vive la France!. That is not easy to sing and I imagine that

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backstage David Cameron and Prince William are starting to sing it. You

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have come from Sheffield, was there ever a doubt in your mind that you

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would be here? Not at all, my 15-year-old daughter has never been

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to an event like this. You have the hat, Sir, were you doubting being

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here? It comes from a good French friend of mine so there was no

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doubt. I hope using well for both teams. But the offer whelming

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message for you, teams. But the offer whelming

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be here this evening standing together and singing together. As a

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be here this evening standing former sportsman I can't only

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be here this evening standing imagine how tough it will be to

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be here this evening standing compose yourself as a player. Both

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sets of fans will stand together. Back to

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sets of fans will stand together. earlier last week. I know. I think

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where everyone has found it so heartbreaking is that it could

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been anyone. It could have been you, you, you. That is what it is

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affected, that is all I have been thinking about for the last few

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days. It is absolutely thinking about for the last few

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heartbreaking. We wish both teams the best of luck in the game. To

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show support, our studio lights are the best of luck in the game. To

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white, and red. After tomorrow the residents of Glenrothis will not

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have their bins collected in four weeks. Can this make residents

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recycle more, or are they at tipping point? Nick has been on the bins. It

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is in that day in Thornton near Glenrothis, Fife. At

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is in that day in Thornton near contents of these blue bins are

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destined for landfill and they are all pretty full. Hardly surprising,

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destined for landfill and they are these bins have not been emptied for

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square Mike weeks. That's right, four weeks. Cheers, mate. In a

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square Mike weeks. That's right, rubbish properly Fife Council has

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increased cycling collections for plastic waste but reduced those

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destined for landfill. This lady's Rubin was last emptied in October.

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Since then we've kept tabs on her rubbish. This is my plastic bin. It

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was collected every four weeks, now it's every two weeks. People of

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Thornton have no fewer than four wheelie bins, a green one for

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plastic and cans, a grey one for paper and cardboard, a brown one for

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food and garden waste and a blue one for what is left. It won't take long

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to fill out. Janet is a single mother with two daughters at home

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and another visiting from university, she says she struggles

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to get everything in the bin when the collection is fortnightly. When

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it was every two weeks it was full and I had to really squash it to get

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everything in. It is very difficult and time-consuming. Janet runs

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everything in. It is very difficult small business from home, to avoid

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confusion she will keep that waste separate and use these bins only for

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family rubbish. Cat litter is stinking and it will be in this

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painful four weeks! -- it will be in this bin, for four weeks. Janet has

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kept a photo diary of the bins and after four weeks she is at tipping

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point, literally. Now I am having to take time out of my day to take

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point, literally. Now I am having to to the dump. It's the weekend,

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usually I do my own thing, spent time with the kids so it is not

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convenient coming here. Why other council doing this trial? At the

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road in Ladybank this is where the landfill goes. The council says that

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more than half the rubbish here could be recycled. Sending waste to

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landfill costs the council upwards of ?10 million a year, so there is a

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financial incentive for them to encourage us to recycle more. Time

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to find out if Janet's family have been throwing away things they could

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have recycled. Stephanie, the recycling adviser, is filling in as

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bin police. But this plastic bit into the plastics, and the cardboard

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fit into the cardboard bin. Janet! Where is your commitment? I realise

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it is an effort. Plastic bin. Honestly! The kids put the rubbish

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out as well. We can see that she is using all four bins. Obviously there

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is reciting material that is going into the blue bin. -- recycling

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material. So if I recycled properly and remembered everything that went

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into each bin, would they be lustful? I think, less full, yet I

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don't know how much less. One councillor helped to set up the

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trial. Think everyone realises you cannot just bury your rubbish the

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ground. By 2020 we could be saving millions of pounds a year. Staying

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on top of our rubbish is time consuming. On the bin round how are

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other locals coping? We still got a massive bin back in the kitchen

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which isn't hygienic. The council say they have to divert what is

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going to landfill and this is one way. There is stuff that can't be

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recycled, that's down to the companies making it. This is not

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working in any way, shape or form. I understand why they are doing it.

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It's a good thing, it's in the early stages to say if it will work or

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not. Time will tell. Look at the size of it, for a month! You don't

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think this trial is changing the behaviour? It is. It puts you off

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recycling altogether! At this stage of the experiment views are as mixed

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as the contents of the bins. Other councils are watching closely to see

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what happens in Fife. If it works for weekly bin collections could

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become a familiar sight to us all. Does this get you going, recycling,

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Alan? I do it but it is washing the stuff out that does my head in,

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people can see you at your kitchen window cleaning your part and they

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think you are having a breakdown, crisp packets and the like! You end

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up washing up your rubbish! Oh look at Alan! Cleaning rubbish! It's

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true! You are currently on your Yap Yap Yap! To. Whereabouts in Britain

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are you? 139 dates -- on a tour. It's my voice, I am like Mariah

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Carey, people want to give a high notes! They once together at! --

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they want to cheer those high notes. They want to hear that. I converge

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for this because you were dazed when I came to see you. I had a crease on

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my face like Blofeld. It had buttons so I work looking like a jigsaw! I

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was in Hull, then Brighton, and than I am off to Northern Ireland, I

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can't wait. Talking about old stuff, you are not keen on people having an

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opinion. I'm sick of it, like trip advisor, everyone has something to

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say and I think people should slip it. Let's have a look, you are

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putting that in your own words. Do you think people have too much to

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say these days? I have been on this tour and are always go on Trip

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Advisor can we talk about it and some of the ironic comments on

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there? Someone gave Stonehenge two stars because there wasn't a coffee

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shop! One woman gave Lake Windermere one star because she had lost her

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handbag there. That is not the lake's fault!

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APPLAUSE Alan, is it fair to say that you are

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more personal? I talk about my other half and my mum, they complain that

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I say to my mum, if you want that kitchen extended or the conservatory

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built, I need to get the money from somewhere and you will be used as

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material! I told my other half, no shoes, I bought them! Know what I

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mean? The money has to come from somewhere, I need material, it is a

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2 hour show, I am sorry, if you are humiliated in the street, comedy

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bought your clothes. And it bought a holiday, you took your mum on safari

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recently. She had a big birthday, I took her there. It was great, we

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arrived at the hut in opened Africa, the door and Alan and Christine was

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written in rose petals on the bed! A bit awkward! Two beds, please! When

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you go on safari it is funny because they were smiling all the excrement.

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Gazelle, this way! They had an earpiece, they were telling us where

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the animals were. It was like an African Derek kora, to go! Tracks,

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tracks! I could hear it like a taxi rank!

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With Chatty Man you have canned laughter, that helps! There are

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pluses and minuses, I love the life, I love doing stand-up, meeting

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people, the things they shout out our crazy, that's good, and then you

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meet all these celebs, chatting to interesting people on the side, I

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have the best of both worlds, I am unlucky. Busy time for you, though.

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Listen to the sound of this. Was that recorded when I was having a

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kip? That plate again. That is my IBS! It's a nice that Mike will

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never want to hear again when you watch this, you will understand why.

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It's autumn and the UK's largest land mammal is preparing to fight

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for the right to sire the next generation. The battle is fierce and

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it is known as the right, and today we're going to try and film it in an

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entirely new way. Stags compete for females by locking

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antlers. Only stags which prove their dominance will have a times to

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reproduce. And we will be hoping to achieve this with a decoy dear for

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the One Show. Hugh is a member of the British Dear Society. Them to

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become concerned about the 1st day, it's the movement of the other

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static coming in, so the fact that your chap is going to be inserted,

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how will he react? Interesting. We are ridding our dummy stag, now we

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just need to pick a fight with the biggest stag we can find. Charlton

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Park farm in Hampshire was once owned by Jane Austen's brother, and

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it's home to a magnificent stag, appropriately named Mr Darcy. He is

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well over 6 foot tall, he is probably about 9 years old, and he's

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running with 37 Hines out there. It's time for Mr Darcy to make a new

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acquaintance. I'm hopeful if we stick our dummy to the ground nearby

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and withdraw to a safe distance, we should soon get a result. After

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several hours, if you grant is at our decoy but nothing else to show

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for our patients. -- a few glances. Time to employ a few tricks. Stags

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wallow in their own your room, known as self anointing. I will try and

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see if we can get some interest from the stag with this call. Stag Mr

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Darcy is simply sniffing the air to see if any females are ready to

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mate. Deer are most active at dawn and dusk. But still, no luck. So the

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change of plan. We will try a different time of day, just after

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dawn. Fallow Deer are closer to our decoy in size and with an extra

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gadget. That's the last of our mini camera is set. On top, we also have

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a speaker that will allow out the call of a loaded. Hopefully we will

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let the battle commence. The fact that the court is making noises

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helping our cause. -- the decoy is making noise is helping our cause. A

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big boy with the big antlers has just turned up and is checking out

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the position. -- opposition. It looks like we're going to be

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invisible the long haul. Dave 3, trying to make our deer look more

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convincing. But not convincing enough. They four, 24-hour

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monitoring, day 5, as the front location, Day 6, this is the closest

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we got. So near and yet so far. It was a great idea but after 6 days of

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trying, we're going to have to go back to the drawing board. In the

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meantime, does anyone want to buy a stag? 1 careful owner, slightly

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smelly. Mike is here with his decoy stag! If

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anybody feels the urge to touch it, you need these rubber gloves. Why

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me? Why? He has been washed in your writing. -- you're in. To be fair,

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it wasn't looking great from the start. They took 1 look at it and

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when the other way. It was a heroic failure. Talking of taking 1 look at

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it, we have the camera is working. Can you imagine what it would have

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looked like. A big red Deer, coming in like that, we would have got

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fabulous comedian unique footage of a rut. The 1st rule about deer fight

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club is you never mention deer fight club. We are going to give you a

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times to redeem yourself, we have of view clips of you doing your all.

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Heroic moments from the past. This is you targeting garden birds. Talk

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Alan through your technique. I am massively into garden birds, tried

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to imitate being a garden bird table. We would turn up in people's

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gardens and I had to sit there for 2 hours, not moving. Has a little

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luck, jumps on my head, on my knee. And straight onto my knee. Whatever

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next! You will see what's next in a minute! Guess what Michael Strine to

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attract when he made this noise. -- was trying to attract. Me? Be my

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bird table! In that case! I was trying to emulate a wood mouse or

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field goal, this barn owl was fading in the field. I made the squeak and

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the barn owl from 50 yards away turned around and glued 2 feet over

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my nose, took 1 look at me and disappeared. I got that close.

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Really? He is genuinely excited! My favourite has to be when you make

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this sound. Because you did actually fall asleep during 1 of these. I

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will say in mitigation, this is trying to get close to a Kingfisher,

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I was lying down in a reed bed, starting at 3:30 a.m. , for 5

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hours, we saw nothing, I was very tired, slightly fell asleep just as

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the bird happened to turn up. That is what we call in TV wildlife

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parlance a 2 shot. Why don't you just go to a petting zoo? He is

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committed! Thank you, Mike. And now to a feat of engineering even more

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impressive than Mike's model stag. Isambard Kingdom Brunel's box Tunnel

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was built in 1841. The problem is, the new trains big to get through

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the tunnel but somehow, they have to get through, here is Marty. The

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great Western Railway is 1 of our oldest train lines. Built in 1841 by

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somebody Kingdom Brunel, it transforms travel, slashing the

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journey time between London and Bath from 16 hours by horse drawn

:24:42.:24:47.

carriage to 3 hours I steam train. Millions of passengers travel on

:24:48.:24:51.

these lines every year. Even engineering masterpieces like this

:24:52.:24:59.

need upgrading every now and then. So 7 1/2 billion pounds is being

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spent on electrifying the railways. Electric trains like this 1 get the

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power they need for their motors from over head electrical lines and

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they make a continuous connection with those lines through these

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springy bits on the top of the carriage here. Installing the

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overhead lines on open track is fairly simple but there is an

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obstacle, the 2-mile long box Tunnel near Bath, which when it was built

:25:30.:25:33.

was the August Railway tunnel in the world. From the outside, this tunnel

:25:34.:25:41.

looks enormous. But once you get inside, you can see it's not as tall

:25:42.:25:48.

as it looks. And there isn't enough room to fit those overhead electric

:25:49.:25:55.

lines. It's also now a listed building and that gives today's

:25:56.:26:00.

engineers are real predicament. They are not allowed to raise the roof

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and it would be too expensive to build a whole new line, so they are

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on the left with 1 option. They decided to lower the track instead.

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That has involved ripping up the old lines and digging out 70,000 tonnes

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of stone. But tampering with an engineering masterpiece like this is

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a delicate business. The director of the project is handy. We have

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lowered the track by half a metre. You are taking out all the stuff

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that has been pushing up against the walls, isn't there any risk of

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damage to the tunnel? We had never taken this amount of ballast out

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before, the tunnel has been here for 170 years, we couldn't quite sure

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what would happen when we exposed the sides of the tunnel itself, what

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we have had to do is make sure we have tunnel monitoring along the

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walls at intervals, have an engineer monitoring the movement and the

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worst thing would be if it goes over 5 millimetres of movement, we stop

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the work. It's this attention to detail which is kept Brunel's

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magnificent tunnel undamaged. The 6-week closure means we get a rare

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chance to go inside with a Brunel's great, great, great grandson. Why is

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it you think your ancestors decided to build this astonishing tunnel

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here rather than doing the obvious thing, to go over the

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here rather than doing the obvious building a railway line to go up and

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up and then down, the energy building a railway line to go up and

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train will need to expend getting up is far too great so the flattest

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train will need to expend getting up calling it Brunel's billiard table.

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Engineer John Buxton has been a keeper of the tunnel for 2 decades.

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Engineer John Buxton has been a horsepower and dynamite, a lot of

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dynamite would Material was excavated and would

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have been put into tubs Material was excavated and would

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pulled the tubs and material up. The men get up and down the these

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shafts? And men get up and down the these

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and down in men get up and down the these

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the material to the surface. Sounds hazardous.

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the material to the surface. Sounds estimated 100 men were

:28:26.:28:29.

the material to the surface. Sounds building this tunnel. It was a

:28:30.:28:34.

remarkable feat of engineering. Like many people, I have been through

:28:35.:28:36.

this tunnel numerous times, but always at Woolwich and 25 miles an

:28:37.:28:43.

hour. I have whipped through the whole thing in 2 minutes. To be able

:28:44.:28:50.

to be inside and enjoy this engineering is a rare treat.

:28:51.:28:55.

I just love his films. The tunnel reopens in December. That's all we

:28:56.:29:09.

have time for. Big thanks to Alan. And's DVD is out now. You can see

:29:10.:29:15.

him also on Channel 4. We are back tomorrow with Rob Brydon. And we

:29:16.:29:18.

have Jeremy Vine.

:29:19.:29:21.

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