17/11/2015 The One Show

Well, hello, welcome to The One Show with Alex Jones. And Matt Baker. We

won't be struggling for chat tonight because our guest is the chatty and

man on telly. If we need to get a word in edge ways, Justin Bieber has

the secret! Open your mouth! LAUGHTER

Please welcome Alan Carr! Hello, my love. Nice to see you. We have the

blindfold if we needed! With God and all! That is the first time you seen

that because you never see an episode. I never watch myself, I

hate the way I sound and look. Even at award shows when you are

nominated and they say, let's have a little clip, I am like this! I can't

stand it. We will warn you when we play some clips, coming up, don't

worry. And also tonight Mike has gone to unbelievable lengths to

capture rare footage of the deer rut. I'm very much looking forward

to seeing that. Before that we have to turn our attentions to the fact

that with less than two hours before kick-off Jiminy's friendly football

match against the Netherlands has been cancelled tonight due to

security concerns. But the England versus France friendly will go ahead

at Wembley. Ewan is there. People want to show their support because

thousands of tickets for the match sold, over the weekend, after the

attacks. They certainly did. It is all about support. Programmer crew

would not normally report from a sporting occasion but this is not

wooden again, there's no mention of four will start up front for

England, people don't seem to care about the result, there is no talk

of who will win. It's all about solidarity and wanting to show

support for France. There were concerns of the weekend but people

might stay away but 10,000 extra tickets were sold since those

horrific scenes in Paris at the weekend. Everyone I have spoken to

just wants to beat you. They'd want to see an empty seat, even people

not massively into football want to be sure to show support France.

Their national anthem will be played on the big screen this evening and

England manager Roy Hodgson has urged the England fans to get

involved and try to sing the French national anthem. I think it is a

wonderful gesture. I walked around the streets in Wembley earlier and I

spoke to all sorts of fans from both sides. The overwhelming feeling that

I got was love and support for each other. If they are anything to go

by, kick-off time will be very special indeed.

People in Paris are not cowering at home, they are filling the streets

of Paris, in defiance and solidarity. Should this match go

ahead? We've all got to stand together, show that we are against

terrorism and show we are not scared. We must all stand against

them because this is not Muslim, not any kind, this is only stupid,

crazy, sick people. Can I ask, up to 5p per minute, you realise the

English fans have been asked to sing the French national anthem? It is

good. When the anthem is saying we are all French. -- when the anthem

is signed, we are all French. SINGING IN FRENCH. We can only get

better! Vive la France!. That is not easy to sing and I imagine that

backstage David Cameron and Prince William are starting to sing it. You

have come from Sheffield, was there ever a doubt in your mind that you

would be here? Not at all, my 15-year-old daughter has never been

to an event like this. You have the hat, Sir, were you doubting being

here? It comes from a good French friend of mine so there was no

doubt. I hope using well for both teams. But the offer whelming

message for you, teams. But the offer whelming

be here this evening standing together and singing together. As a

be here this evening standing former sportsman I can't only

be here this evening standing imagine how tough it will be to

be here this evening standing compose yourself as a player. Both

sets of fans will stand together. Back to

sets of fans will stand together. earlier last week. I know. I think

where everyone has found it so heartbreaking is that it could

been anyone. It could have been you, you, you. That is what it is

affected, that is all I have been thinking about for the last few

days. It is absolutely thinking about for the last few

heartbreaking. We wish both teams the best of luck in the game. To

show support, our studio lights are the best of luck in the game. To

white, and red. After tomorrow the residents of Glenrothis will not

have their bins collected in four weeks. Can this make residents

recycle more, or are they at tipping point? Nick has been on the bins. It

is in that day in Thornton near Glenrothis, Fife. At

is in that day in Thornton near contents of these blue bins are

destined for landfill and they are all pretty full. Hardly surprising,

destined for landfill and they are these bins have not been emptied for

square Mike weeks. That's right, four weeks. Cheers, mate. In a

square Mike weeks. That's right, rubbish properly Fife Council has

increased cycling collections for plastic waste but reduced those

destined for landfill. This lady's Rubin was last emptied in October.

Since then we've kept tabs on her rubbish. This is my plastic bin. It

was collected every four weeks, now it's every two weeks. People of

Thornton have no fewer than four wheelie bins, a green one for

plastic and cans, a grey one for paper and cardboard, a brown one for

food and garden waste and a blue one for what is left. It won't take long

to fill out. Janet is a single mother with two daughters at home

and another visiting from university, she says she struggles

to get everything in the bin when the collection is fortnightly. When

it was every two weeks it was full and I had to really squash it to get

everything in. It is very difficult and time-consuming. Janet runs

everything in. It is very difficult small business from home, to avoid

confusion she will keep that waste separate and use these bins only for

family rubbish. Cat litter is stinking and it will be in this

painful four weeks! -- it will be in this bin, for four weeks. Janet has

kept a photo diary of the bins and after four weeks she is at tipping

point, literally. Now I am having to take time out of my day to take

point, literally. Now I am having to to the dump. It's the weekend,

usually I do my own thing, spent time with the kids so it is not

convenient coming here. Why other council doing this trial? At the

road in Ladybank this is where the landfill goes. The council says that

more than half the rubbish here could be recycled. Sending waste to

landfill costs the council upwards of ?10 million a year, so there is a

financial incentive for them to encourage us to recycle more. Time

to find out if Janet's family have been throwing away things they could

have recycled. Stephanie, the recycling adviser, is filling in as

bin police. But this plastic bit into the plastics, and the cardboard

fit into the cardboard bin. Janet! Where is your commitment? I realise

it is an effort. Plastic bin. Honestly! The kids put the rubbish

out as well. We can see that she is using all four bins. Obviously there

is reciting material that is going into the blue bin. -- recycling

material. So if I recycled properly and remembered everything that went

into each bin, would they be lustful? I think, less full, yet I

don't know how much less. One councillor helped to set up the

trial. Think everyone realises you cannot just bury your rubbish the

ground. By 2020 we could be saving millions of pounds a year. Staying

on top of our rubbish is time consuming. On the bin round how are

other locals coping? We still got a massive bin back in the kitchen

which isn't hygienic. The council say they have to divert what is

going to landfill and this is one way. There is stuff that can't be

recycled, that's down to the companies making it. This is not

working in any way, shape or form. I understand why they are doing it.

It's a good thing, it's in the early stages to say if it will work or

not. Time will tell. Look at the size of it, for a month! You don't

think this trial is changing the behaviour? It is. It puts you off

recycling altogether! At this stage of the experiment views are as mixed

as the contents of the bins. Other councils are watching closely to see

what happens in Fife. If it works for weekly bin collections could

become a familiar sight to us all. Does this get you going, recycling,

Alan? I do it but it is washing the stuff out that does my head in,

people can see you at your kitchen window cleaning your part and they

think you are having a breakdown, crisp packets and the like! You end

up washing up your rubbish! Oh look at Alan! Cleaning rubbish! It's

true! You are currently on your Yap Yap Yap! To. Whereabouts in Britain

are you? 139 dates -- on a tour. It's my voice, I am like Mariah

Carey, people want to give a high notes! They once together at! --

they want to cheer those high notes. They want to hear that. I converge

for this because you were dazed when I came to see you. I had a crease on

my face like Blofeld. It had buttons so I work looking like a jigsaw! I

was in Hull, then Brighton, and than I am off to Northern Ireland, I

can't wait. Talking about old stuff, you are not keen on people having an

opinion. I'm sick of it, like trip advisor, everyone has something to

say and I think people should slip it. Let's have a look, you are

putting that in your own words. Do you think people have too much to

say these days? I have been on this tour and are always go on Trip

Advisor can we talk about it and some of the ironic comments on

there? Someone gave Stonehenge two stars because there wasn't a coffee

shop! One woman gave Lake Windermere one star because she had lost her

handbag there. That is not the lake's fault!

APPLAUSE Alan, is it fair to say that you are

more personal? I talk about my other half and my mum, they complain that

I say to my mum, if you want that kitchen extended or the conservatory

built, I need to get the money from somewhere and you will be used as

material! I told my other half, no shoes, I bought them! Know what I

mean? The money has to come from somewhere, I need material, it is a

2 hour show, I am sorry, if you are humiliated in the street, comedy

bought your clothes. And it bought a holiday, you took your mum on safari

recently. She had a big birthday, I took her there. It was great, we

arrived at the hut in opened Africa, the door and Alan and Christine was

written in rose petals on the bed! A bit awkward! Two beds, please! When

you go on safari it is funny because they were smiling all the excrement.

Gazelle, this way! They had an earpiece, they were telling us where

the animals were. It was like an African Derek kora, to go! Tracks,

tracks! I could hear it like a taxi rank!

With Chatty Man you have canned laughter, that helps! There are

pluses and minuses, I love the life, I love doing stand-up, meeting

people, the things they shout out our crazy, that's good, and then you

meet all these celebs, chatting to interesting people on the side, I

have the best of both worlds, I am unlucky. Busy time for you, though.

Listen to the sound of this. Was that recorded when I was having a

kip? That plate again. That is my IBS! It's a nice that Mike will

never want to hear again when you watch this, you will understand why.

It's autumn and the UK's largest land mammal is preparing to fight

for the right to sire the next generation. The battle is fierce and

it is known as the right, and today we're going to try and film it in an

entirely new way. Stags compete for females by locking

antlers. Only stags which prove their dominance will have a times to

reproduce. And we will be hoping to achieve this with a decoy dear for

the One Show. Hugh is a member of the British Dear Society. Them to

become concerned about the 1st day, it's the movement of the other

static coming in, so the fact that your chap is going to be inserted,

how will he react? Interesting. We are ridding our dummy stag, now we

just need to pick a fight with the biggest stag we can find. Charlton

Park farm in Hampshire was once owned by Jane Austen's brother, and

it's home to a magnificent stag, appropriately named Mr Darcy. He is

well over 6 foot tall, he is probably about 9 years old, and he's

running with 37 Hines out there. It's time for Mr Darcy to make a new

acquaintance. I'm hopeful if we stick our dummy to the ground nearby

and withdraw to a safe distance, we should soon get a result. After

several hours, if you grant is at our decoy but nothing else to show

for our patients. -- a few glances. Time to employ a few tricks. Stags

wallow in their own your room, known as self anointing. I will try and

see if we can get some interest from the stag with this call. Stag Mr

Darcy is simply sniffing the air to see if any females are ready to

mate. Deer are most active at dawn and dusk. But still, no luck. So the

change of plan. We will try a different time of day, just after

dawn. Fallow Deer are closer to our decoy in size and with an extra

gadget. That's the last of our mini camera is set. On top, we also have

a speaker that will allow out the call of a loaded. Hopefully we will

let the battle commence. The fact that the court is making noises

helping our cause. -- the decoy is making noise is helping our cause. A

big boy with the big antlers has just turned up and is checking out

the position. -- opposition. It looks like we're going to be

invisible the long haul. Dave 3, trying to make our deer look more

convincing. But not convincing enough. They four, 24-hour

monitoring, day 5, as the front location, Day 6, this is the closest

we got. So near and yet so far. It was a great idea but after 6 days of

trying, we're going to have to go back to the drawing board. In the

meantime, does anyone want to buy a stag? 1 careful owner, slightly

smelly. Mike is here with his decoy stag! If

anybody feels the urge to touch it, you need these rubber gloves. Why

me? Why? He has been washed in your writing. -- you're in. To be fair,

it wasn't looking great from the start. They took 1 look at it and

when the other way. It was a heroic failure. Talking of taking 1 look at

it, we have the camera is working. Can you imagine what it would have

looked like. A big red Deer, coming in like that, we would have got

fabulous comedian unique footage of a rut. The 1st rule about deer fight

club is you never mention deer fight club. We are going to give you a

times to redeem yourself, we have of view clips of you doing your all.

Heroic moments from the past. This is you targeting garden birds. Talk

Alan through your technique. I am massively into garden birds, tried

to imitate being a garden bird table. We would turn up in people's

gardens and I had to sit there for 2 hours, not moving. Has a little

luck, jumps on my head, on my knee. And straight onto my knee. Whatever

next! You will see what's next in a minute! Guess what Michael Strine to

attract when he made this noise. -- was trying to attract. Me? Be my

bird table! In that case! I was trying to emulate a wood mouse or

field goal, this barn owl was fading in the field. I made the squeak and

the barn owl from 50 yards away turned around and glued 2 feet over

my nose, took 1 look at me and disappeared. I got that close.

Really? He is genuinely excited! My favourite has to be when you make

this sound. Because you did actually fall asleep during 1 of these. I

will say in mitigation, this is trying to get close to a Kingfisher,

I was lying down in a reed bed, starting at 3:30 a.m. , for 5

hours, we saw nothing, I was very tired, slightly fell asleep just as

the bird happened to turn up. That is what we call in TV wildlife

parlance a 2 shot. Why don't you just go to a petting zoo? He is

committed! Thank you, Mike. And now to a feat of engineering even more

impressive than Mike's model stag. Isambard Kingdom Brunel's box Tunnel

was built in 1841. The problem is, the new trains big to get through

the tunnel but somehow, they have to get through, here is Marty. The

great Western Railway is 1 of our oldest train lines. Built in 1841 by

somebody Kingdom Brunel, it transforms travel, slashing the

journey time between London and Bath from 16 hours by horse drawn

carriage to 3 hours I steam train. Millions of passengers travel on

these lines every year. Even engineering masterpieces like this

need upgrading every now and then. So 7 1/2 billion pounds is being

spent on electrifying the railways. Electric trains like this 1 get the

power they need for their motors from over head electrical lines and

they make a continuous connection with those lines through these

springy bits on the top of the carriage here. Installing the

overhead lines on open track is fairly simple but there is an

obstacle, the 2-mile long box Tunnel near Bath, which when it was built

was the August Railway tunnel in the world. From the outside, this tunnel

looks enormous. But once you get inside, you can see it's not as tall

as it looks. And there isn't enough room to fit those overhead electric

lines. It's also now a listed building and that gives today's

engineers are real predicament. They are not allowed to raise the roof

and it would be too expensive to build a whole new line, so they are

on the left with 1 option. They decided to lower the track instead.

That has involved ripping up the old lines and digging out 70,000 tonnes

of stone. But tampering with an engineering masterpiece like this is

a delicate business. The director of the project is handy. We have

lowered the track by half a metre. You are taking out all the stuff

that has been pushing up against the walls, isn't there any risk of

damage to the tunnel? We had never taken this amount of ballast out

before, the tunnel has been here for 170 years, we couldn't quite sure

what would happen when we exposed the sides of the tunnel itself, what

we have had to do is make sure we have tunnel monitoring along the

walls at intervals, have an engineer monitoring the movement and the

worst thing would be if it goes over 5 millimetres of movement, we stop

the work. It's this attention to detail which is kept Brunel's

magnificent tunnel undamaged. The 6-week closure means we get a rare

chance to go inside with a Brunel's great, great, great grandson. Why is

it you think your ancestors decided to build this astonishing tunnel

here rather than doing the obvious thing, to go over the

here rather than doing the obvious building a railway line to go up and

up and then down, the energy building a railway line to go up and

train will need to expend getting up is far too great so the flattest

train will need to expend getting up calling it Brunel's billiard table.

Engineer John Buxton has been a keeper of the tunnel for 2 decades.

Engineer John Buxton has been a horsepower and dynamite, a lot of

dynamite would Material was excavated and would

have been put into tubs Material was excavated and would

pulled the tubs and material up. The men get up and down the these

shafts? And men get up and down the these

and down in men get up and down the these

the material to the surface. Sounds hazardous.

the material to the surface. Sounds estimated 100 men were

the material to the surface. Sounds building this tunnel. It was a

remarkable feat of engineering. Like many people, I have been through

this tunnel numerous times, but always at Woolwich and 25 miles an

hour. I have whipped through the whole thing in 2 minutes. To be able

to be inside and enjoy this engineering is a rare treat.

I just love his films. The tunnel reopens in December. That's all we

have time for. Big thanks to Alan. And's DVD is out now. You can see

him also on Channel 4. We are back tomorrow with Rob Brydon. And we

have Jeremy Vine.