Episode 2 Wannabes

This programme contains strong language.

It wasn't great, it was not great at all.

I can't keep blaming the fucking sound guy.

I says to Kat the other day, I says to her,

"I'm sick of looking at your two faces."

I like to change my hair with my mood.

My hair's fucking blue! I have blue hair!

Dear God, here we are at Voodoo's first launch.

# I need closure

# I need closure... #

You create the hype, you don't believe the hype.

'Well, this is where we held the first auditions for Voodoo.

'This is where Carly and Vicky came.'

Can't believe we're back here again.

I wanted us all to sit down and talk.

The first thing I did was ring her and say to her,

you need to speak to Vicky.

And she rang and...

..she didn't want to meet, did she?

She said she wasn't coming back.

She said she was leaving, that was it.

She wasn't going to go back on her word.

It was constant in my face, "You're flat, you're off."

I said that, I said that to Kat.

Here's me, "I'm fed up being told I'm flat, I'm off."

I says to her, "You're never told when you're flat and you're off."

And she was, like, "I know." I'm just not taking it no more.

I am happy with the decision I've made and I've left, and that's it,

and I'm really happy and excited to know what comes next.

I don't know. I'm gutted, like. I feel like an eejit.

Everybody's like, "Oh, how's the band going, what's the craic?"

You're like, "Mmm, we lost a member."

Vicky, see, to be honest, see why I'm ringing you?

It's basically...we've auditioned and kind of got someone

that's ready to move in, to join the band, like.

But I wanted to talk to you. Are you sure this is what you want?

-You're gone, are you?

-'Yes, yes, I'm away.'

Hi.

INDISTINCT SPEECH OVER PHONE

'..I hope everything does do well, and I know Voodoo will do well.

'It's sad that things left on bad terms,

'things were said in the spur of the moment.

'I can't take nothing back now.'

All right, no problem, take care of yourself.

-'You too. Bye.'

-Bye.

Are you still there?

Just doesn't give a fuck.

Well, that's it, she doesn't care. At least it was...

At least that's closure, I suppose.

How did I hold myself together there? My anger.

-What did you say to her?

-Wait, she's away upset.

You heard her. "I don't care, that's what I want, I'm happy, I'm far happier."

That's it now. We just need to get a new member now.

Ten to three. Not one person showed up.

Vicky's broke my heart.

-Take it to the streets.

-Let's take this shit to the streets.

Toast to a new start. Love yous. Katriona.

'I think somebody who's 6ft 10,'

-long, blonde hair to her bottom. All her own.

-Nice.

-Orange face.

-Not orange, my love.

-Tanned.

-Tanned.

But great singing voice, great personality, hard-working.

We're a girl band currently out scouting for our third member.

-Preferably blonde, that's why we've stopped yourself. Can you sing?

-No!

This is going to be much harder than we first anticipated.

Well, well, where are our blondies?

-Can you remotely sing?

-Remotely.

-Jennifer, your sister, Hannah, can.

-Yeah, my sister.

-Is she blonde?

-Yeah, really tall, pretty.

-Yeah!

What age is she, though?

-17.

-Oh.

-Can you sing at all?

-Yes.

-Yeah!

-Do you want to give us a wee proof...?

-No, I'm definitely not singing.

She's not allowed to come out, her manager's strict,

but she wants us to come back when she finishes work.

Her name is Sarah, and she's tall, taller than me.

She says she wasn't an amazing singer, but then neither am I.

We've got her number, she wants to audition. She's called Sarah.

'I'm Simon Cowell.'

'Can I be Cheryl? I'll be Cheryl.'

-Can you be Dannii? I don't like her.

-I don't want to be Dannii - she's as dull as dishwater.

I'll be Louis.

-Hi! Come on in. How are you?

-Very good.

-Thank you for coming. How are you?

-Nice to meet you.

You have the right look, the look's there. Me and Kat...

I think I nearly choked in River Island when you were putting clothes away!

I know how intimidating it is - sometimes when you're nervous, you don't perform to your best.

-So we'll take that into account.

-Don't worry.

Just as long as you have a voice.

# Since I've come on home

# Well, my body's been a mess

# And I miss your ginger hair

# And the way you like to dress

# Why don't you come on over

# And stop making a fool out of me?

# Why don't you come on over Valerie? #

Woo!

I'd really like to be a part of their band.

So, hopefully, they'll pick me!

-She's no singer.

-She can't sing, like.

No, not she's no singer, she's not a solo singer.

But when we all sing, it's not as if she's fucking tone-deaf.

Bring a wee girl in like that that can do the harmonies,

take the low harmonies and isn't looking to fucking take over.

Then, I think you've got a good fit there, Carly.

I don't care. You don't need to be the best singer in the world.

You don't. We've said that every time.

It's not what you know, it's who you know.

-Right, do you want to ring her and tell her she's got it now?

-No, no.

-What if Sarah comes and she's 20 times better?

-She's not answering her phone.

-Let her wait tomorrow.

-Don't be evil. Why don't we feel the love?

-No, feel the love tomorrow.

-Let her!

She'll be more excited when she finds out tomorrow.

It'll look like you're too keen if you phone her now.

We're really, really happy. We absolutely loved you.

And, um, if you're happy, we're happy.

If you'd like to join Voodoo, we'd be delighted.

-It just...

-Feels right.

-It does.

I'm all about karma and feelings, and I liked that girl when we met her.

# She's got an orange face

# False hair to her waist

# Dreams of being on TV

# She's got a Fendi bag From her time as a WAG

# Back in 2003... #

I actually want you to look quite, sort of, like rag dolls, almost.

Edgy rag dolls.

-Kat, they're amazing.

-Do you like those?

-Yes.

-You have a really edgy look.

I think they're a little bit different to your normal girly band,

which is sort of bubblegum pop.

They're more edgy and a little bit more unique.

Chin up a little bit.

This is the part that I'm probably not most comfortable with, out of everything.

You know me, I'm a singer, I just want to sing,

so this part's totally new to me and very different.

You two look amazing, and I look disgusting.

I'm the size of a lemon.

You can't film this shit.

This is our lovely wee band, XXX. Say hi.

We had our own band going.

Still have, as such.

But we came in to help the girls out, anyway,

and see what comes out of it at the end of the day.

# Welcome to the life of a wannabe

# Oh-h-h

# One thing I'd love to be... #

'I'm feeling the pressure, because I've been asked about 100 times

'for demos for gigs and different things.'

I'm running about speaking to people and they're like, "Give me a demo."

And the demos we have have Vicky's vocals on them,

so they're obviously no good.

And Voodoo has a totally different sound now.

# I don't feel a thing

# I don't feel a thing... #

It sounds like fuck all, like.

And you know how good that was sounding.

-We have to just rearrange it, then.

-It needs rearranged, I think.

-Why are you scared?

-I'll tell you later.

-Tell me now. Because of Sarah?

-(Yeah.)

You know, after the anger and hurt and all that's died down,

it's like we're back to the beginning again.

# Water's running in the wrong direction

# I got a feeling it's a mixed-up time... #

'Big ideas of what they're going to do,

'and I don't know if that'll work or not.'

I think they just need a bit more experience of what they're doing.

I think they know that themselves.

But if they write their own songs, which they have,

they've as good a chance as anybody of making it.

I still think they need to concentrate a lot on their vocals.

'Because they've been together from the start'

and they're obviously best friends now,

it's a bit weird trying to fit into that.

'They were saying Vicky had an amazing voice,'

but she didn't know how to harmonise or work together with the band.

I don't have a strong voice, but I know how to harmonise and I can work with the band.

'I think that's the difference.'

# Let's just get back together

# We should've never have broke up

# You're telling me That my heart won't beat again... #

# That's me in the spotlight

# Losing my religion... #

Kat, she's a great songwriter - the songs that she's written are really good.

'They maybe need a wee bit more in them, or something like that.'

They maybe need expanded a bit more.

But the songs are excellent.

You have to play for the enjoyment of it, because there's not much to be made out of it.

Unless you really hit the big time, which you're not likely to do.

'Two, two, one, two. One, two.

'One, two, one, two.'

Is the mix a wee bit loud?

Try not to sing too loudly into the mic

and just sing at the same level as me,

so I'm not trying to have to shout over the top of you.

You know how loud you have to sing.

You're going to have to dance a wee bit more.

I was more concerned about the vocals.

# It's so filthy... #

What way are we doing that leg-up thing, so we don't look like three wallies?

-I'll just go...

-What do we do with our mics?

Give it up for Voodoo!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

This is an original.

It'll be on iTunes in about four weeks from now,

so get downloading. I hope you like it.

# Welcome to the life of a wannabe

# Oh, it doesn't come for free

# Welcome to the life of a wannabe

# It's so filthy. #

APPLAUSE

'Well, this is my wee gym, Brook Activity Centre,'

which is the local gym in Twinbrook, in the heart of the West.

This is where I come to do all my training.

Ugh!

Ah!

Oh, Jesus!

I'm so unfit.

I was noticing just, like, a lump. It was really, really small.

You know the way you kind of push things to the side?

It just got bigger and bigger and bigger.

And then my mum was freaking out, so I went to see the doctor.

And the doctor was, like, you need to get that checked out ASAP.

She put the fear of God in me, like.

It's actually just right below my vocal chords,

but it's got that big now, it's kind of rubbing on them.

You probably heard the other night, my voice gets to a certain point and breaks.

That's cos of that.

But it does need to come out, cos it's on my thyroid gland.

I shouldn't be running about with it, but I'm just putting it off.

I have to believe, I definitely do believe.

I think we're like a rough diamond.

We need so much work. So, so much.

I don't think we're amazing and fantastic, but...

..I think we're good enough, I do.

So, I just need to lose 10 stone, we need to get somebody to sign us

and have a number one

and all go off to live in London in penthouses and stuff.

That's the plan.

MALE VOICE SINGS

Do the harmony again.

-Hello, there.

-Thanks for coming down.

-Nice to meet you.

So, before I start giving any advice, I need to find out more.

-It'd be good to hear what you're doing.

-Come in, have a nosey.

I ended up in London in the music business for a few years as a buyer

for a large chunk of the record business.

Then came back here, worked for a lot of record companies,

mainly independents, couple of majors.

# She's just a girl with a sad ambition

# Getting ahead is a dirty mission

# Welcome to the life of a wannabe

# Oh, it doesn't come for free... #

-Do you know what music you're trying to make?

-No. Voodoo music.

Music for the soul. I don't know.

Cos the three of us are very different, we bring...

Although I do all the writing and stuff, you know...

It has to sell, doesn't it? It has to be commercial, people need to get it.

The sort of music market you're subconsciously trying to head towards is a very commercial one.

Usually there's hundreds of people involved in the whole process of creating a record.

So, you need to firmly decide what it is you want to be.

The other thing that would be pertinent to ask is, have any of you had vocal coaching?

-I have.

-You've had vocal coaching?

-Do you still continue?

-We did for a while.

It helped me out, because I'm good with the harmonies and everything.

But I don't really feel the benefit a lot.

What you're aiming for, to do it from Belfast, is way down the line and is very ambitious.

-But I wish you well.

-We are ambitious.

-I wish you well.

You need to want it, you need to want to be working two or three nights a week.

And buying lots of music and seeing how it's been made,

begin to understand the recording process.

You won't be filming in three weeks, and they've got a record deal.

That's not going to happen here.

But if they can get to the next stage and hone their skills.

If there's six songs with a hook, at least they can give it a go

to get to the first stage, get to first base.

Complimented my music, so I can't really say...

Cos he was very straight - he's not one of these people to blow wind up your ass.

If the songs hadn't been hooky, he'd have told us.

He wasn't completely negative, he had some good things to say.

He didn't even say he thought we were good or had the potential to go for it.

-He didn't really give us any criticism.

-That's why I feel...

Yeah, he didn't say you have a good look or a good sound. He just said one of the songs was catchy.

Sheena writes lyrics, and I would never take that away from her, she's brilliant.

But there's three of us and we all work hard.

And I don't like that he concentrated maybe on one person.

He could've spoken to us all. It was rude.

We're putting the guys under pressure, we're hoping to bang out three songs in 30 minutes!

No, we're just going to get on and if we even got two nice songs, we'd be happy, wouldn't we?

I'm nervous about today, I've never done it before.

And I've got a really bad cough, that doesn't help!

The best thing about the studio is you can listen to your voice and know when you went wrong.

The sound technician's very good.

We do it ourselves first, and everyone's like, "Oh, my God, it sounds so shit."

But everyone sounds shit sometimes.

MUSIC PLAYS

Does he know what song we're doing?

Thomas - Good Girl.

# See this girl She's dancing on the bar

# Hold her close She might just be a star. #

I don't know how the fuck I'll sing this, cos the bits I'm singing,

whenever I go to sing, it stops again.

My head's away. Right, anyway.

-# Don't get me wrong... #

-SHE SCREAMS

-It sounds great.

-I'm sorry. I can't sing it, you may sing it.

-No.

-Sing it.

-No, keep going.

# I'm a good girl really Only when I'm sleeping. #

-She's really nervous.

-What do I do in that bit?

-ALL:

-# Only when I'm sleeping Only when I'm sleeping. #

-You need to come in...

-# Don't try and judge me... #

You need to come in straightaway.

But come in previous to that on the last line of the first verse.

# I love when they pretend not to stare

# But don't try and judge me

# It's a statement, not a dare

# I'm that kind of woman who does her hair to match her underwear. #

Sorry, love, you're not singing, you need to sing.

# Don't try and judge me. #

You're still not singing, Sarah.

-Just give me a minute!

-Are you OK?

-She's crying.

She's crying and everything.

Babes, I'm not shouting at you, I'm just saying you need to sing.

Come here.

Take a deep breath. It's all very new.

You've only trailed in a couple of weeks ago.

-She's just nervous.

-Aye, that's it. Easy done.

Sarah, I'm going to sing "Don't..."

before you come in, so you can get your note right.

# I love when they pretend not to stare

# Don't try and judge me

# It's a statement, not a dare. #

When it comes to recording, you're so naked and exposed,

if you don't have that confidence to say,

"I am good enough," you can just fall to pieces. It's very hard.

We just need to build Sarah's confidence up a bit

and we'll be flying.

-Are you OK, love?

-Yeah.

-I wasn't shouting at you.

'The more I did it, it was coming a bit easier. It was when I kept doing it wrong,'

and the girls were getting a bit annoyed with me, and it was kind of "Oh"

and it just all got to me.

But it's my first time, so it'll just get better.

It sounds good all mixed together.

But they've just kind of put my voice down to the minimum!

# Happy birthday dear Katrina

# Happy birthday to you! #

CHEERING

Ready for number one...! CHEERING

# You don't have to fear me

# It's a rule I'm always keeping...#

# I'm a good girl really

# Only when I'm sleeping

# Only when I'm sleeping! #

I've done a fair bit of partying these past couple of days.

We're really wrecked.

Sarah's in the clothes she was wearing partying last night.

-Katriona's up there fixing her.

-I had half an hour's sleep last night.

Then I was up for colleague at nine.

Then I got out of colleague at half three,

was in work four to eight and came straight here.

I'm actually like, urgh!

# A quarter past September and I roll out of bed

# I've got a brass band percussion thumping tunes in my head

# An invisible friend whispering once in my ear

# You'd feel so much better if you'd just have a beer. #

At the minute, they're not blending,

you know. I think Kat is very strong,

but she can use a lot more of her range.

She can go higher than she realises. She likes to keep her voice down.

I, personally, think that Kat should be out on her own.

She has a great stage presence for what she wants -

she wants to portray that rock kind of look.

It's so clear when you're watching them on stage

that she is the one that is there doing that so naturally.

The other two girls have to work at it.

But I do understand why they want to be a band. We're fun.

-What did Pauline say? I should leave?

-Yeah.

-I know.

At the end of the day, if I wanted to be on my own,

I would have started out on my own. Do you know what I mean?

I do hope to God that my future's with them, you know what I mean?

I don't really want to do it on my own.

Too many people, I'd say, have too many opinions.

We'll have to watch each other's backs, because we'll get people...

Sure everybody thinks I'm not fucking singing! I couldn't care less!

Although Sarah's 18, she sees the bigger picture.

She's saying to herself, "At the end of the day, I'm in a pretty cool band

"who's got a lot of stuff going for them."

She's happy enough to... She's knows her place and is as happy as Larry.

All three of us, we're happy like that.

That's when we can relax and accept what we're about.

There's no more replacing, we're not the Sugababes.

I think if either me or Carly decide to throw the towel in,

they'd be no more replacing, and that would be that.

# ..Would you lie with me

# And just forget the world?

# Forget what we're told

# Before we get too old. #

-A real-life ostrich had to get plucked for this.

-Ew!

It didn't die, at least!

# Come here, rude boy, boy Can you get it up?

# Come here, rude boy, boy Is you big enough? #

What you're gonna do, you're gonna hear the truck go

and look directly into the camera and sing away.

It's gonna take a while, a few takes from beginning to end.

# I'm a good girl really

# Only when I'm sleeping

# Only when I'm sleeping. #

Look into the camera.

Where's the models? I'm traumatised.

People just came...with my brother and she came and left.

"Ring to get in." What? What the fuck do you ring to get in, a bell?

They didn't leave a cow bell or something?

-Excuse me?

-What's it for?

You just need to sit in the audience

and pretend you're part of the fashion show.

If you can find anybody else, bring them as well.

Thank you so much, girls. That's us more or less sorted.

# A quarter past September and I roll out of bed

# I've got a brass band percussion thumping tunes in my head

# An invisible friend whispering once in my ear

# You'd feel so much better if you'd just have a beer. #

DJ's here with me, and the socialites sing with Carly and wee Lauren and all.

Then...a prostitute scene on a main road, and that's it.

She's called you over. Right. And all of a sudden, there's no sign.

He's gonna get down and try and fix it, and I'm gonna get all that down there -

it looks like he's doing dirty things to me.

And it's Carly's boyfriend, so I feel like a nob!

-I am mortified.

-You're the one that wanted the shot. Now, come on. Here!

Kat, Kat, it's either going to look really cool or really stupid.

-It could be worse - it could be Ricky doing it.

-Give me that face.

Mouth open. Loving it.

Count to three and then walk into the window.

I'm the model coming off the runway and I'm walking out of the club

and then I go to get a lift, but there's prostitutes in the background,

so it looks as if I'm prostituting myself.

Can I just see your legs open, a wee bit open. Jesus!

-It's OK, just a bit higher again. OK, guys, that's a wrap!

-Yay!

Well done, everybody. Woo-hoo!

I love all that, but because it was Carly's boyfriend... No! I don't love all that! No!

No, I love the craic.

It's exactly what it was!

We're so excited - shall we watch it now?

Yeah, but don't show me... I feel sick, I'm so excited.

I know this is what we said at the start, we wanted a music video.

Now we'll have one and now we're scared.

-Let's watch it.

-Yes.

-Let's do it.

# Don't try and judge me

# It's a statement, not a dare

# I'm the kind of woman

# Who does her hair to match her underwear

# You don't have to fear me

# It's a rule I'm always keeping

# I'm a good girl, really

# But only when I'm sleeping

# Only when I'm sleeping... #

LAUGHTER

# Don't get me wrong I'm full of ambition

# I'm not much of a cook but I'll heat up your kitchen

# I have an army of fans singing praise in my ear

# Give us a wave, love I'll give you a cheer

# Every deal has a memory I'll play truth or dare

# I've got my own booze but I really don't care

# ..Yesterday's favours

# I love when they pretend not to stare... #

-I look ugly on camera.

-I'm rough as...

I look like I have a skin disease. Like a egghead.

-I think yous look lovely.

-You look gorgeous. You're nuts.

I feel really emotional.

This time last year, we were saying we wanted to get a music video.

We didn't think we'd get there and we have one now.

-It's really overwhelming.

-It's really well put together.

-They've made such a good job on it.

-They've done a brilliant job, I'm so delighted.

-I feel like crying, I'm so... I dunno.

-It's awesome.

-I'm so excited, I'm so proud of us. High-five.

-High-five.

I think that makes us a bit more credible now.

When you see that we look polished.

That's the end product of the crazy, crazy year of hard work.

-Me and the girls know we have a long way to go.

-Absolutely.

But I couldn't be happier.

-Watch this space, Voodoo!

-Yeah.

# Don't try and judge me

# It's a statement not a dare

# I'm the kind of woman who does her hair to match her underwear

# You don't have to fear me

# It's a rule I'm always keeping

# I'm a good girl really

# But only when I'm sleeping

# Only when I'm sleeping

# You'll see this girl sleeping in your bed

# You'll see this girl Remember what she said

# You'll see this girl She's dancing on the bar

# Hold her close She might just be a star! #