Grottos, TVs and Black Puddings! All Over the Place


Grottos, TVs and Black Puddings!

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Transcript


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Fancy a whistle-stop tour of the UK with your CBBC mates?

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How's that? Ed and London bowl us over.

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Dick and Dom get a bit cheesy.

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Oh, look at that!

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Ian leads us on a merry dance.

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And Johny throws black puddings.

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# All Over The Place

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# All Over The Place

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# North south east west

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# On a bizarre quest Me and my mates

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# All Over The Place

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# It's true what you've heard Everything is absurd

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# Whatever we do is strange but true

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# All Over The Place All Over The Place

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# Bet you didn't know this stuff was in the UK

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# But it turns up All Over The Place! #

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Well, isn't this nice, being in Margate?

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I only wish I could find some shells.

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There's loads of shells.

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Ed, that's a shell suit. I'm talking about actual shells.

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Oh, right. You mean like this.

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No! Not a bomb shell, like, a real shell!

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Oh, I know what you're after. Ta-da!

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-Who's that guy?

-My French pen-friend, Michel.

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-Bonjour, Michel.

-Ah, bonjour.

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No, Ed. I'm talking about proper shells, as in,

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"She sells seashells on the seashore" shells.

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Right. Right. Well, in that case we need to go to the shell grotto.

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That was quite impressive, what Holly did there.

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It's a mystery why it's called a shell grotto. No, only joking.

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The mystery is that...

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Whoa.

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This is extraordinary and it's all really intricately designed.

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It feels like you're inside some jewellery.

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I thought they would be shells like, I don't know, this big,

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not all these tiny little ones.

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Think about it, though, these are all stuck on by hand.

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You say "hand" - could have been an alien.

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-Oh, wow.

-This must be where the farmer lowered his child...

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Yeah. He lowered him through a hole, didn't he?

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Looks like a church or something, doesn't it?

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You can imagine they didn't have electricity,

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so it would have been candlelight

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reflecting off the surfaces. It would be incredible.

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I just can't understand where they got all these shells from.

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Maybe they came from Margate,

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a beach-side town, quite literally next to the sea.

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Whizzer.

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What's this, no sea shells on the seashore? That's not cricket.

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That is cricket.

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But that's not important right now.

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The mystery of Margate's missing seashells

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has been puzzling some of Britain's greatest minds,

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as well as this idiot.

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What's a seashell? Hur hur hur.

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We'll attempt to get to the bottom

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of this most perplexing disappearance.

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With some seashells commanding prices as high as two guineas,

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one theory is that shells are being taken by moustachioed criminals,

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like this chap, who then sells them back to the sea for a tidy profit.

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The discovery of this incredible shell here,

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under what some scientists are calling "sand",

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has prompted a new and exciting theory.

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The shells are tunnelling!

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Tired of life on the surface,

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they have dug an intricate series of burrows deep down into the ground,

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their long-term plan being to tunnel right through to Australia

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and open an ice-cream parlour.

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Of course, some thinkers believe the shells

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have been made into a giant underground grotto,

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just yards from the beach itself.

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But only an idiot would believe that.

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I believe it!

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Precisely. So there we have it.

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No answers but lots of wild theories and that's almost as good. Cheerio!

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So basically we don't know any more than we did when we came in.

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We don't know when it was built,

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we don't know how it was built, where the shells came from.

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I wonder how many other strange mysteries this grotto possesses.

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Ed?

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Ed?!

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Ed?! Ed!

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Anyway, Ed, let's settle this once and for all.

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Dogs are better than cats, no doubt about that, right?

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Dogs will rescue you if you get stuck up a mountain.

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You don't get that from a cat!

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What are you doing up a mountain?

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Probably getting away from the dog cos it's so annoying!

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Yeah. Well, at least dogs don't spend all their time

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licking their bums, not like cats.

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At least after it's licked its own bum,

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it doesn't lick you in the face, like a dog.

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That's no way to say hello, is it?

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Ed, talk to the paw, all right?

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I'm not listening. There's a way to prove dogs are better.

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We'll have to ask the experts.

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-Fine.

-Let's go.

-Where are they?

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You'll find the experts here at Battersea Dogs & Cats Home.

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This is Carlton. He knows dogs are better.

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-Let's go look at the dogs.

-Let's look at the cats.

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Got to say, I'm with the cats.

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-Smells of dogs.

-Let's go and see some pets!

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..though the cats look after themselves.

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-So this is the dog dormitory, as it were?

-This is it.

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This is where the big guys stay.

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They've got quite a spotless little room here. Where does their poo go?

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There's actually a drain at the back there, so when kennels are cleaned,

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the poo is washed away.

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-So this is the cattery.

-Hear that?

-Nice and peaceful.

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Peace and quiet. Welcome to the calm and stress-free life of the cat.

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If cats are popular, why do you get more dogs?

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I'm not sure of the exact reason but there's...

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I know why, it's cos people like cats so much,

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they want to hang on to them.

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They don't like dogs so much, they let them run off.

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Where do the dogs come from?

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It's a mixture. The majority of the dogs we get come to us as strays.

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They've been wandering around in the streets with no home to go to?

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Exactly.

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High five! High five!

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You work here, do you want to take all the animals home?

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-You do. Yeah.

-I want to take these. I want six cats already.

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Absolutely. I've got two cats and a dog already.

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So that means you like cats twice as much as dogs!

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Have you ever had a time when a dog's broken out of its room?

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We have. There was a famous incident with a dog called Red.

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That dog was... Had worked out a way to open the kennels

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and was opening the kennels, letting his friends out

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-and then having a midnight feast in the kitchen.

-Really?!

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And here's what you didn't see.

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Easy does it.

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Easy does it.

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Yes! Done it!

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-Woof! Woof woof woof!

-Sh!

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-Woof! Woof woof woof woof!

-Sh!

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-I'm going to let you out as we agreed, yeah?

-Brilliant!

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But I don't want this turn into no big thing.

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Come on. Join in.

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There's a whole box of balls up there. Help yourself.

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You don't even have to fetch them.

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-I knew this would happen.

-Come on. Everybody's having a great time!

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Yeah. That's the problem. The music, the lights...

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If we don't keep it down, we're going to get found out.

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Look, you all get one last song

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-and then you go back in your kennels, yeah?

-All right.

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-Make sure it isn't a loud one.

-Hit it!

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# Who let the dogs out?

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-# Woof woof woof woof

-Shush!

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-# Who let the dogs out?

-Shush!

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-# Woof, woof, woof, woof

-Stop it!

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# Woof woof woof woof. #

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What's all this then?

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Er... This isn't what it looks like.

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It looks like two CBBC presenters dressed up in dog suits.

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You'll never beat me at a riddle.

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All right, try this one then.

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If two witches watch two watches,

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-which witch would watch which watch?

-Er... Um...

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-That's stupid. Witches don't wear watches.

-They do.

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-They don't.

-All right. Want to bet?

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Yeah. I can't wait till you show me a real witch.

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WITCHY CACKLE

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Where did that come from?

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The Wookey Hole, of course.

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Come on, I'll show you.

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Come along.

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I thought the smell was Ed's feet.

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Look at this.

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-So big!

-Wow. It's amazing. It's a little bit creepy.

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When you're up there, you'd never think that all this

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is under your feet, would you?

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Ed and Gemma, welcome to the Wookey Challenge!

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Ed, you've got Chris, who will tell you about the history of the caves.

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And Gemma, you've got Gayle, who knows all about tourism.

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Whoever finds out the most facts is the winner.

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Three, two, one, go!

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-How long have people been coming to the caves?

-About 100 years.

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-Why is it called Wookey Hole?

-It's an old name about chasing animals.

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And how many people do you get every year?

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-Over 250,000.

-What?!

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-How are they made?

-Water flows through and eats at the limestone.

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What about the water, where does it come from?

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From the River Axe.

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Have cavemen lived in them?

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Yes. 50,000 years ago, the Celts.

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And do visitors drop stuff into it?

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They drop pennies and coins.

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Did people find any other stuff?

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-All sorts. We have remains from a witch that lived here.

-Really?!

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What's that funny cheese smell around here?

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That is our cheddar cheese from Ford Farm in Dorset...

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Stop!

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-I think we did well there, Chris.

-We did. We did.

-Thank you.

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And the winner is...Gemma!

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What?!

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WITCHY CACKLE

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Hey, Ed, did you hear that noise?

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You're not fooling me. That's the sound of you celebrating.

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Right, I'm hungry, let's find those cheeses.

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I've never seen so much cheese in my life.

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I know. It's amazing, isn't it?

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It's mouldy because they put it in the caves

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and it gets the moisture out of the walls, which flavours it,

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and it's actually cheddar in there.

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Looks absolutely minging.

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It does.

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..and leaves the caves.

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-# Happy birthday to you. #

-Did you hear that?

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# Happy birthday to you Happy birthday to you

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# Happy birthday dear...

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# ..Cheese! Happy birthday to you. #

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Oh, look at that.

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You got me a cake and everything.

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Yeah, it's cheesecake.

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Well, had to be, didn't it? The best birthday ever.

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Technically, it's been your only birthday ever.

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Have you ever heard of anyone having a second birthday?

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Er... No.

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It's as if they just disappear, you know.

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They mature for a year and then suddenly just leave the cave.

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Why would anyone leave the cave?

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Well, I mean, take Georgie, for example.

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Rumour has it that he was taken on his first birthday by humans

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and made into some kind of lunch for some kind of ploughman!

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Well, I mean, if all the humans take the cheese

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when they're one year old...

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how come you're still here?

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Well, I guess the rumours are just a load of...

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Yarrgh!

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Wait! Put him back!

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-# Happy birthday to you... #

-No.

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-# Happy birthday to you... #

-It's not!

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Oh, stop! No! No! Stop it! Shut up!

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I can definitely make out a witch's hat, or is that an elephant?

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SHE CACKLES

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Argh!

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-Who are you?

-I'm the Wookey witch.

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-What do you do?

-Well, I meet and greet all the visitors

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-and take them round.

-Oh, right.

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This may sound stupid but I don't suppose you wear a watch, do you?

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Well, actually, I do.

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-Oh, is that the time? Must go. Goodbye.

-Yep.

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Another thing I was wrong about.

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-Ed, you all right? Looking a bit freaked out.

-Yeah. Well, I just...

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Right, well, you know, we haven't seen the witch.

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She must have gone out for dinner.

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I know we have this bet and I said she was here

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and she was wearing a watch and...

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So it pains me to say it, but you've won the bet, all right?

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-Yeah, but you see...

-Happy?

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-Oh, hang on. You're buying the tea and cake now, aren't you?

-Yes.

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-Goodbye, Ed.

-Cheerio. Nice meeting...you.

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You're right, she does wear a watch.

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Yeah. I think YOU are buying the tea and cake! Come on.

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I want a big piece of something squishy and lovely and delicious.

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This was in the Guinness Book Of Records in 2004

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as the world's smallest TV.

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You need a magnifying glass to watch it.

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Which means it's completely pointless.

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Whaaat?!

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There was only BBC

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in black and white and it was not broadcast all day.

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-It was boring.

-Yes, very.

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This is a televisor... Designed by John Logie Baird.

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So just imagine somebody's being filmed.

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That's turned into a signal which is sent down that wire.

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That wire there sends a signal to the light

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and that tells the light to shine at varying brighnesses.

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You've got this disk here that's got lots of holes in different places.

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If it spins at certain speeds, it creates lines

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which form an image on the lens, a moving image.

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I can actually see a moving image there.

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You should see an image of a face.

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I bet he was good at quizzes.

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Hello and welcome to TV Dinners -

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the game where you literally play for your dinner.

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This is for your starter, Johny.

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In 2010, which TV programme had the highest viewing figures?

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-I'm going to guess...

-Was it A - Strictly Come Dancing,

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or B - the X Factor?

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I'm going to go with X Factor.

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Correct, yes, the X Factor. You've won some delicious soup.

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There you go, Johny, enjoy that.

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-What is it?

-It's made from Brussels sprouts.

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-Oh, er, I'll have it later. Lovely.

-No, eat it now.

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-No, later.

-Eat it now!

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# TV Dinners. #

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Which city in the UK watches the most television per week, Johny?

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Is it A - London, or B - Birmingham?

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-London.

-Oh, it's good but it's not right, Johny, no.

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It's Birmingham. Those Brummies love their telly.

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Here's what you could have won - lovely cabbage and chips.

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-Look at that, it could have been yours.

-Oh, man!

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Oh, go on, I'll give you some. There you go.

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# TV Dinners. #

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How many TV sets were bought in the UK in 2010, Johny?

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Is it A - 9.5 million, or B - 11.5 million, Johny?

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Either way, it's a lot of tellies.

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9.5 million.

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-Is correct, Johny!

-Yes!

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Look what you've won - this delicious chocolate surprise.

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Finally something I can eat.

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The surprise is that the sauce is made from egg mayonnaise.

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Oh!

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This TV show's rubbish.

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I wonder what John Logie Baird would've watched back in the day.

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IN SCOTTISH ACCENT: "Have fun.

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"Enjoy yourself, Logie Baird."

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Well, I'll show them.

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When they get a load of my catchily-named

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semi-mechanical analogue television device

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no-one will ever leave the house again.

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I wonder what programmes people will watch on my catchily-named

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semi-mechanical analogue television device 80 years from now.

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Could your stupid face be more stupid?

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Stupid! Stupid! You are the Weakest Link. Goodbye.

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No, Big Brother, when I said I wanted Jaffa Cakes,

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I meant round ones. You've given me square ones.

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What am I supposed to do with that?! It's got four sides and everything.

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I don't know which way to start. This is a total catastrophe.

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HE SOBS

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Don't you ever talk about my mother.

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Shut up, Phil! She ain't even your real mother.

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DUFF, DUFF, DUFF, DUFF-DUFF, D-D-D-DUFF!

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What have I done?!

0:18:000:18:02

Here we are in the Lost Gardens Of Heligan in Cornwall.

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Well, I am. Ed's late, he's very late.

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And he had planned a musical tour for these lovely tourists.

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He can't find the Lost Gardens Of Heligan.

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How ironic. Looks like I'm going to have to do this tour by myself.

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# I'm looking for The Lost Gardens of Heligan

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# My map reading's not going Particularly well-igan

0:18:380:18:41

# Left or right? It's so hard to tell-igan

0:18:410:18:44

# I just can't find The Lost Gardens of Heligan!

0:18:440:18:48

# We can't wait here all day For Ed again

0:18:510:18:54

# He probably forgot The time I said again

0:18:540:18:57

# Maybe he overslept in bed again

0:18:570:19:00

# I'll have to show you around Instead again.

0:19:000:19:04

# How can you lose The Lost Gardens of Heligan?

0:19:040:19:07

# It's a question upon I'm starting to dwell again

0:19:070:19:10

# I'm so frustrated I just want to yell again

0:19:100:19:14

# Where on earth are The Lost Gardens of Heligan?!

0:19:140:19:17

BIRD CALLS

0:19:190:19:21

How far?

0:19:210:19:22

# For years these gardens Were neglected

0:19:230:19:26

# But now their beauty's Been resurrected

0:19:290:19:33

# The Mudmaid, the Jungle The Pineapple Pit

0:19:360:19:39

# It's just a shame that Ed's not here to see it!

0:19:390:19:42

# Anyone seen The Lost Gardens of Heligan?

0:19:420:19:45

# I've walked so far my feet Have started to swell again!

0:19:450:19:49

# And I've had about enough of The sound of this bell-igan!

0:19:490:19:53

# By the way, mate, you can't spell-igan! #

0:19:530:19:56

Hang on. Woohoo!

0:20:030:20:04

# Don't worry, Iain All is well again

0:20:040:20:08

# And, boy, have I got A story to tell again

0:20:080:20:11

# About the Lost Gardens Of Heligan again-igan

0:20:110:20:15

# And turns up just in time To say farewell again. #

0:20:150:20:18

Ah, sorry.

0:20:180:20:19

So this must be the People's Palace.

0:20:310:20:33

It's not just an art gallery, it's also a museum for Glaswegian life.

0:20:330:20:38

-Pretty impressive?

-I think we should look around.

-Yeah.

0:20:380:20:41

Whoa!

0:20:410:20:42

Oh, they've got one of these. It's an Anderson shelter.

0:20:490:20:52

People had them in their gardens during the war

0:20:520:20:55

to protect them from the bombs...

0:20:550:20:57

Chop, chop, Ed!

0:20:590:21:01

Ed, I don't know why you wore those shoes.

0:21:050:21:08

-You're sliding all over the place.

-What do you mean?

0:21:080:21:10

-My banana boots are cool.

-They're not yours.

0:21:100:21:13

They belong to Billy Connolly, the famous Scottish comedian.

0:21:130:21:16

He gave them to the People's Palace. Take them back!

0:21:160:21:19

What kind of person wears food for clothes, anyway?

0:21:190:21:22

If we had to wear food for clothes, I don't think it would be very good

0:21:240:21:28

because if you got hungry, everyone would just eat their clothes

0:21:280:21:31

and it wouldn't be very good cos we'd all be walking around, naked!

0:21:310:21:36

I'd have a cake dress.

0:21:360:21:38

A top made of out of cauliflower.

0:21:380:21:41

A really pretty red dress made out of salamis.

0:21:410:21:45

When it went all mouldy, everyone would, like, be disgusted by you.

0:21:450:21:50

They'd be like, "Ew, I don't want to be your friend, you stink."

0:21:500:21:53

Oh, hello. You caught me enjoying my favourite breakfast

0:22:020:22:06

of Yorkshire pudding.

0:22:060:22:07

As a Yorkshireman, it's what I like to eat every day

0:22:070:22:10

and it's why I've come here, to Ramsbottom in Lancashire.

0:22:100:22:14

Every year, to symbolise the rivalry between Lancashire and Yorkshire,

0:22:140:22:18

they throw dirty, disgusting Lancashire black puddings

0:22:180:22:22

at a pile of good, honourable Yorkshire puddings,

0:22:220:22:24

trying to dash as many as they can to the ground.

0:22:240:22:27

As a Yorkshireman, I think this is totally unacceptable

0:22:270:22:30

and it's why I've brought Yorkshireman Johny Pitts today.

0:22:300:22:33

-Isn't that right?

-That's right. It's all right, calm down.

0:22:330:22:36

I'm as outraged by this atrocity as you.

0:22:360:22:38

The question is, what will we do about it?

0:22:380:22:41

I think we get out there, find out what the rules are

0:22:410:22:44

and beat them at their own game.

0:22:440:22:45

Are you suggesting we enter and win it for Yorkshire?

0:22:450:22:49

Yes. Yes, I am. For Yorkshire, our Yorkshire!

0:22:490:22:51

Two Yorkshiremen against Lancashire! Put it there, I love it. Brilliant.

0:22:510:22:56

So, er...interesting accent you've got there.

0:22:560:22:58

Whereabouts in Yorkshire do you live?

0:22:580:23:00

Oh, I don't live in Yorkshire.

0:23:000:23:02

OK. Well, where were you born then?

0:23:020:23:05

I was born in Rustington, on the south coast.

0:23:050:23:08

So you're not even a real Yorkshireman?

0:23:080:23:10

My grandparents were from there. That counts, doesn't it?

0:23:100:23:13

Well, not really, but I'm here now, so you'll have to do.

0:23:130:23:16

I tell you what, we're going to have a right laugh tonight, pal.

0:23:160:23:19

Have a good 'un.

0:23:190:23:21

Didn't know he spoke French.

0:23:210:23:23

-We've got to throw these... BOTH:

-Urgh!

0:23:260:23:29

..at these...

0:23:290:23:30

-BOTH:

-Mm!

0:23:300:23:31

-..up there...

-..for a quid.

0:23:310:23:33

BELL RINGS

0:23:330:23:35

Not sure what they win though. Maybe some Yorkshire puddings.

0:23:390:23:42

Tell you what, that's a long best-before date!

0:23:510:23:53

There's a Lancashire stall and a Yorkshire stall next to each other.

0:23:530:23:57

Oh, yeah! Ah, the smell of home!

0:23:570:23:59

No, no. That's the Lancashire stall.

0:23:590:24:01

It's a vegetarian nightmare!

0:24:080:24:10

Like to try some delicious black pudding?

0:24:100:24:12

Er... Maybe not now.

0:24:120:24:15

Tell you what, how about the loser today has to eat cold black pudding?

0:24:150:24:19

OK. That's fair enough.

0:24:190:24:21

-That's a deal.

-You're on. Prepare to taste black pudding, you.

0:24:210:24:24

There's a thing - the golden grid - which you need to play the game.

0:24:240:24:28

It's arriving at the train station soon.

0:24:280:24:30

That sounds absolutely amazing.

0:24:300:24:31

-Oh, my gosh.

-They parade it through the streets with great ceremony.

0:24:310:24:35

BAGPIPES PLAY

0:24:350:24:37

APPLAUSE

0:24:440:24:45

Yep.

0:24:450:24:46

Not sure why we're following them or where they're going.

0:24:480:24:51

Some sort of procession. It's a lot of fuss to make about something

0:24:510:24:54

which is essentially a drain cover...

0:24:540:24:57

..painted with a gold paint.

0:24:570:25:00

Yeah, you're laughing, but you're the ones following it!

0:25:000:25:03

BAGPIPES PLAY

0:25:030:25:05

Woo!

0:25:090:25:11

Can you imagine if someone painted all the drains gold?

0:25:140:25:18

It would be mayhem!

0:25:180:25:19

-Oh!

-Hit it!

0:25:220:25:24

So, can Johny knock any of his beloved Yorkshire puddings off

0:25:240:25:27

with a black pudding?

0:25:270:25:28

He's not started very well. Oh!

0:25:280:25:33

That's £1 wasted, isn't it?

0:25:360:25:38

Here we go. Here we go. This is the one.

0:25:380:25:40

-You get three black puddings for £1.

-That wasn't a throw!

-Oh.

0:25:400:25:46

Ed needs all the practice he can get.

0:25:460:25:49

-Oh!

-Argh!

0:25:510:25:52

That was rubbish.

0:25:520:25:54

-That was also rubbish.

-What was that? What was that?!

0:25:540:25:59

It's not going very well for us so far, is it?

0:25:590:26:01

We haven't knocked any down. What will we do?

0:26:010:26:03

-We need some more money.

-Yeah.

0:26:030:26:07

I didn't bring my wallet today. Sorry.

0:26:070:26:10

-Look!

-For Yorkshire, Johny!

-That's the last time!

0:26:100:26:13

Ah!

0:26:160:26:17

This is going terrible.

0:26:170:26:20

I nearly did it. Just one more, just one more.

0:26:200:26:23

-I told you...

-Come on, Johny. Come on.

0:26:230:26:25

It's the last one you're having. Don't come back.

0:26:250:26:27

How's this? How's this?

0:26:270:26:30

-Yes.

-Not bad.

-Excellent.

0:26:300:26:32

Did you see that? Thank you.

0:26:320:26:35

Oh!

0:26:420:26:43

-It's all about the lob, isn't it?

-Yes. Exactly.

0:26:470:26:50

Johny only has to knock down two to beat Ed and six to beat the leader.

0:26:500:26:54

So close.

0:26:540:26:55

He's the winner. Come on!

0:27:000:27:02

-You know who this is, don't you?

-No.

0:27:020:27:04

This is Tony. He makes the black puddings

0:27:040:27:06

used in the World Black Pudding Throwing Championships.

0:27:060:27:09

-Fascinating. Well done.

-Thank you,

0:27:090:27:11

and I believe there was a bet on this as well, lads.

0:27:110:27:13

And you lost 2-1. So congratulations,

0:27:130:27:17

you can have a black pudding. Commiserations, you won.

0:27:170:27:20

I get a nice trophy.

0:27:200:27:21

You get one of those things! Come on, get stuck in.

0:27:210:27:24

Oh, all right then. Fair enough, I suppose.

0:27:240:27:27

-They're really nice actually.

-No way. Let me try some.

0:27:300:27:33

You can have a bit, then you'll have to get your own.

0:27:330:27:36

That's delicious. Hey, stop throwing those things! Can I have one?

0:27:370:27:40

You've been watching All Over The Place!

0:27:440:27:46

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0:27:540:27:57

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