Spar for the Course Arthur

# Every day when you're walkin' down the street

# Everybody that you meet

# Has an original point of view

-# And I say, hey!

-Hey!

# What a wonderful kind of day If we can learn to work and play

# And get along with each other

# You gotta listen to your heart Listen to the beat

# Listen to the rhythm The rhythm of the street

# Open up your eyes! Open up your ears!

# Get together and make things better By working together

# It's a simple message

# And it comes from the heart

# Oh, believe in yourself For that's the place to start

-# And I say, hey!

-Hey!

-What a wonderful kind of day

# If we can learn to work and play

-# And get along with each other

-Hey!

# What a wonderful kind of day, hey! What a wonderful kind of day, HEY! #

Hey, DW.

-Hey!

-Whoa!

Hello. I'm Muffy Crosswire,

the host of today's show, which is all about cooperation.

Nothing illustrates cooperation better than the engine of a car.

Let's look under the hood of this affordable sporty Canberra Emu.

Buster!

What are you doing in there?

You're ruining my intro.

No, no. Arthur said I could open the show today.

Hold on, everyone, we're going to Centaurus A,

a galaxy over 10 million light years away.

Welcome to the Symbiosa, a yet-to-be-discovered planet

where there is no fighting and all the creatures love each other.

Aargh! Something's on my head!

Aw. It's an octobadger.

He wants to nibble on your brain.

It's how they show affection.

Get it off! Get it off!

Don't worry, Bruiser Barnes will save you.

Take that you cute, fuzzy cyclops.

Binky! What are you doing? You can't body slam the octobadger.

We're on Symbiosa, the love planet.

No, we aren't. We're in a professional wrestling ring.

DING!

See? And the octobadger is fine.

(It's all fake.)

But I'm doing the show open.

Uh-uh, it's my turn.

-You're both wrong. It's my show.

-Oh, yeah?

Tell that to him.

27...

28...

Oh, try hitting it harder.

CRASH!

RUMBLING

Whoo-hoo!

We're really sorry about the windmill, Mr Schenk.

It's not the first time it's broken but it's definitely the last.

Guess I'll just have to buy another one.

Let's see, there's a 1742 Stomermolin...

Nah, too fancy.

Why does it have to be a windmill?

Yeah, it's always a windmill.

Couldn't you get something a little more...exciting?

Like what, a wind turbine? Where would the hole go?

No, something radically different.

Yeah, like, I don't know, a dinosaur or...

A replica of Machu Picchu made entirely of yucca.

What? That's radically different.

Whoa, whoa, slow down.

Who's going to design this? The mini golf elves?

-No, we would.

-Yeah!

And we'll only charge you for parts and labour.

Better yet, we'll do it for free.

Hmm. An 18th hole designed by the customer.

There could be some good press in that.

ALL: Whoo-hoo!

OK, you've got a week,

but it better be good or else I'm going to go with Big Windy,

the budget windmill.

HE TAPS HIS PENCIL

How about this?

A windmillipede.

What's a windmillipede?

I don't know.

I can't think with you making all that noise.

It's not noise, it's Max Roach's drum solo from Cherokee.

Binky, now is not the time to be thinking of music.

Wait! That's it!

-We do a musical 18th hole.

-How would we do that?

-Easy.

The goal is to hit the ball into the bell of a clarinet.

The tee is on top of a grand piano.

-You hit the ball onto a timpani

-DRUM BEATS

and it bounces onto another timpani

-then rattles around a triangle...

-TRIANGLE RINGS

..then it drops onto the keys of a xylophone,

-then hits a cymbal...

-CYMBALS CRASH

..and finally lands in the clarinet,

which triggers the last movement of the William Tell Overture.

Whoo-hoo!

Well, what do you think?

-Yes!

-Finally, my genius has been recognised.

-What?

You actually understood all that?

Huh? Oh, no, I was thinking of my own idea.

What about this?

We make the 18th hole look just like the moon!

When the player tees off,

he stands in an exact replica of Alan Shepard's footprints.

You have to hit the ball into the tractor beam of a flying saucer.

But along the way there are all these craters and aliens

and moon rocks you have to avoid.

Wait!

We also add an anti-gravity dome over the whole thing

to make it really like the moon!

If there's no gravity,

the ball's just going to float around.

So is the golfer!

I know! Pretty challenging, right?

Mine was much better.

No, it wasn't. And anyway we could never build it!

Oh, but we could build an anti-gravity dome?!

I didn't say we'd build it! Muffy will buy it!

Guys, this fighting isn't getting us anywhere!

You have to learn to compromise. Here's what we'll do.

The whole course is a leisurely drive through the country,

back to your castle.

First, you hit the ball into a top-of-the-line car.

Then you drive over a charming little bridge

and through a Swiss Alp!

And then you park in front of Castle Crosswire

where Rivets, the robot butler,

lifts the ball out of the car and drops it into the hole.

The end.

SHE CHEERS

How is that a compromise?

Yeah? There was no music or space in it at all.

True, but isn't it a great idea?

I don't think so - it's way too easy.

Oh, effort is overrated!

It's better than that goofy moon idea,

but mine is still the best.

There is nothing goofy about space travel!

Fine, there's only one way to solve this.

-HE SIGHS

-I know, I know,

we all have to work together.

No! The first one to tell Mr Schenk their idea wins!

Ta-ta!

Mr Schenk, I've got it. It's a castle and...

And this little car drives up to it and it's all...

It's musical! Everyone loves music.

Two words - "historic moon landing"!

THEY ALL TALK OVER ONE ANOTHER

Enough!

I can't listen to a million ideas! I need one good idea.

And you know what's a good idea? A windmill.

So that's what I'm going with.

I loved my idea. It would have been a great 18th hole.

-Anything would be better than a windmill.

-We can't give up.

-Mr Schenk?

-Please!

-Give us another chance!

OK, you've got one more day.

-What do we do now?

-Now, we all have to work together.

-I still like my music idea.

-Well, I still like my moon idea!

We can't all do our ideas!

Wait... Why can't we?

And do what? A big musical castle on the moon?!

Actually, that sounds kind of fun!

Yeah! Instead of a fancy car...

-It's a fancy moon buggy.

-A Crosswire Motors moon buggy!

But before you get the ball in the buggy,

you have to hit these xylophone keys!

Which play notes that make the aliens run away!

So you can drive up to the castle in time for tea!

But, wait, how do we know this will actually work?

We'll have to make a model.

Would you care to do the honours?

DING!

DONG!

DING!

Great(!) We've built an impossible golf hole.

There's no way to hit the xylophone keys AND get it into the hole.

-Should we just get rid of the keys?

-No!

Why don't we stagger the keys like this and add some angles?

That way, if you hit this one key first,

it sends the ball in the direction you want it to go next.

Sort of like a pinball game.

DONG-DING!

Why can't I get it to go all the way to the end?!

-I think it's losing momentum.

-What does THAT mean?

Every time the ball hits something, it slows down a little.

I get it!

So we have to find a way to give the ball more speed.

I know!

How about we add a ramp?

What if we make it like a skateboard park?

We add a little hill here, right before it gets to the...

Hole that leads to the car!

DING-DONG-DINGDONGDING-TING!

The ball makes it all the way through the course.

I have to hand it to you kids, that is one swell 18th hole!

I just have one thing to add.

ALIENS JIBBER-JABBER

CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYS

-Yes!

-APPLAUSE

The windmill was my idea.