Cousin Dev Bear Behaving Badly


Cousin Dev

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Ha! Gotcha!

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Nev and Keith have got to be around here somewhere.

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Erm, aren't we a little too old to be playing hide-and-seek?

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No, no, no!

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A-ha!

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I can hear you!

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Ha ha ha!

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Oh...

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GIGGLING

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GIGGLING

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Sure I heard Nev behind me.

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KNOCK AT DOOR

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Erm, just a second.

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KNOCKING CONTINUES

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Er-hum...

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Nev!

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What are you doing outside the flat? The hide-and-seek rules are clear.

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-No wonder I couldn't find you.

-No, no, I'm...

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-Is Krazy Keith out here?

-No...

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Come on, back in the flat.

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I'm sorry, but you have me confused with somebody else.

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Where did you learn to talk like that, Nev?

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Again, dreadfully sorry, but I'm not Nev.

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But you must be.

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My name...

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..is Dev.

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Here I am.

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Oh, hey, Nev!

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Oh...oh!

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But...

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Confused?

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Wait a sec.

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Who are you again?

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So you see, I heard my long-lost cousin Neville

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was living here and I thought I must look him up while I'm in town.

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That's amazing, Dev! I didn't even know Nev HAD a cousin. Did you?

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-No, no, no, no.

-You must be related, look how similar you are.

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Oh...

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Oh, it's 11 o'clock. I'm gonna be really late for work.

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Oh, sorry to disturb.

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I'll be on my way.

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Lovely to meet you, Nev, Barney.

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I'll be off, then.

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To my hotel.

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To my lonely, dark, damp and dingy hotel.

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You can stay with us, if you like, while you're in town.

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Too right, bro.

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Oh, I couldn't impose.

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Don't be silly. Guests stay all the time.

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Arghhh!

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It's just some of them never leave.

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I win! Ha ha!

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Ha! That was my greatest hiding idea ever, holding onto the ceiling.

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Really?

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Yeah. Koalas have very strong arms.

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Wackadoo!

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Oh, I'm seeing double.

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No you're not! Keith the Koala, meet Dev.

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It's Nev's cousin.

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I didn't know you had a cousin. Please to meet you, buddy.

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Any cousin of Nev's is a friend of mine.

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Keith lives under the floorboards. It a secret, no-one knows he's here.

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Oh, don't worry. I'm very good at keeping a secret.

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Mwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!

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Pleasure to meet you. Karl.

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It's Keith.

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That's settled, then. Dev, you're staying with us.

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-Nev, don't forget Mr Prank.

-Angry Pants.

-Yeah!

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He's coming round to fix the table.

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Oh, I still say that table's fine, Barnster.

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-Oh really?

-Yeah.

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Uh!

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Mr Prank ordered tools. They were delivered yesterday.

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I'm sure he has everything. Please stay out of his way.

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-No problemo.

-Great.

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I'm off to work. You'll have lots to catch up on. See you later.

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Oh, I'm sure we'll have a lovely time.

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Mwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!

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Oh...

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Ah!

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Right, then...

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What do you guys fancy doing?

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Socks! Socks! Socks!

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Nev, we spent yesterday organising your socks.

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More! More!

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You've got a guest, Nev.

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What do you fancy doing, Dev?

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Oh, don't mind me.

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I have plans. Big plans.

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Huge plans.

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Mwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!

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Is it just me, or do you not understand his jokes either?

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No, no, no, no.

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Ha ha ha! Yes, there appears to be everything I need here. Good.

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Excellent, in fact.

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Dev? You're not supposed to touch any of that stuff.

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It belongs to old Angry Pants.

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-Yes, well you see, Steve...

-It's Keith.

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..I'm not really one for following orders.

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I'm better...

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..at giving them!

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ARRGHHHHHH!

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Something the matter?

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N-n-n-n-nothing.

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Nothing at all.

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Ah, you perhaps noticed my horns.

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-Horns? W-w-w-w-what horns?

-No, no, no!

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Yes, funny little things.

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I've had them since birth. Nothing to be alarmed by.

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Ah, course not!

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We'd not really noticed them.

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No way, Jose.

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Anyway...

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Wouldn't it be fun if I fixed that table for Mr Barney?

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Before he got home.

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We shouldn't touch stuff like that.

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-That's Angry Pants' job.

-Yeah, yeah!

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I'm sure it'll be fine.

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Why don't you two move all that stuff over there for me?

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No, no, no, no.

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Move it NOW!

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HAMMERING

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Mwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!

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Dev's been there an awfully long time. What can he be up to?

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-He, he, he!

-Confused.

-Me too, buddy.

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I think he has Barney's keyboard and bits of the old drum kit there, too.

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I know he said stay away but maybe we should check what he's up to.

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Now, please.

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Right, let's go.

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HAMMERING CONTINUES

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Arghhhhhh!

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HE CRASHES TO FLOOR

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Yes? Can I help you?

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Ah, g'day. We were just checking whether you needed anything.

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With help fixing up the table.

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Table? Oh, yes. The table.

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No, it's, er...coming along just fine thank you.

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Oh, er, OK. So long as you're sure.

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Quite sure. Goodbye.

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Can't scare me.

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Yes?

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Eurghh! Why you...

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KNOCK ON DOOR

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-MR PRANK:

-Mr Barney, sir?

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Mr Barney, it's Mr Prank. I've come to fix your table.

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Angry Pants! Hide.

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-KNOCK ON DOOR

-Later, Nevvie. Arghh!

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Coo-ey!

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Mr Barney, sir?

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No, no, no, no!

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Oh, it's just you, bear.

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Stay away from me.

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Atchooo!

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Oh, excellent!

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A big screen. Maybe I'll get some privacy while I work.

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Right, I was just...

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Where's my stuff gone, bear?

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I know, I know!

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Yes?

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Ah, you must be Mr Prank.

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What?! No!

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But...

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Ah...

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Uh...

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I'm Dev, Nev's cousin.

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Delighted to meet you.

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Two...blue...bears?!

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Too right, bro.

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Well, look at that. He can count, how marvellous.

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Atchoo!

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Atchoo!

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It's my allergies. I'm having some sort of nightmare.

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Oh, not yet.

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Oh, I tell you, Doris,

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there's something not right about that Dev bloke.

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Mmm-hmm-hmm, ha ha ha!

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You wouldn't like him if you met him.

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He's got me right stressed out, I tell you.

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I'm going to listen to some music to relax.

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MUSIC

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That's the stuff.

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RADIO: We interrupt this relaxing music

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to bring you an unrelaxing newsflash.

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A small, blue evil genius with scary horns has escaped from prison

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and is in the area. He is dangerous and not to be trusted.

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Oh! Wackadoo!

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This is bad.

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Yes, this is very bad.

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Now back to the music, which probably won't be relaxing any more.

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No chance, buddy.

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Wackadoo! Oh!

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Right, both of you, stay back.

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Love you, Mr Angry Pants.

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Well, I'm going to do my work then I'm going to get out of here.

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So where's my wood?

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It's behind that screen.

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Just there.

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Yeah, yeah.

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Right, then.

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What on earth's this?

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What happened to the table?

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An excellent question.

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Allow me to demonstrate.

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Groovy!

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Yes, it is rather.

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My mind machine also has an amazing effect, cousin Neville.

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Look at Mr Prank here.

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Uh! Mr Angry Pants?

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Oh, he won't answer you unless I tell him, too.

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You see, this machine is a mind-control device.

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He's now my mindless henchman.

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No, no, no, no!

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Yes, yes, yes, yes. Watch this.

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Mr Prank, moo like a cow.

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Moo!

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Dear, oh dear, oh dear.

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Ha ha ha!

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Prank, cluck like a chicken.

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HE CLUCKS

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I'm fwightened.

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And so you should be.

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Luckily for you, this machine only works on people and not bears.

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Phew-y!

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Yes, unluckily for you I'm an evil genius who will take over the work.

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Starting with this flat.

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No, no, no, no.

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And you are in my way.

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But not for long, though.

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Mr Prank?

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Capture Nev the bear.

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Uh, run!

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Oooooohhhh!

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Oh!

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Oh!

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Wackadoo, Nevvie! You escaped!

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Aye, aye, Captain!

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I was just coming to find you.

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That cousin of yours, Dev, is properly evil.

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I heard on the radio he escaped...

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from prison!

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Ah! Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear.

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What are we gonna do?

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Oh!

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Hey, Nev. Nev?

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It's me, Melanie. Just run by to...

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Hello?

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Hey, Angry Pants. Nice shades.

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Are you OK, Mr Prank?

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Prank, say hello to Melanie.

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Hello to Melanie.

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Hello.

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Oh, er, yeah, hello.

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Are you OK, Nev?

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What's with the horns and moustache?

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How come your ear's all better?

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Erm...fancy dress.

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You sound different, too.

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Sound different? Oh, er...

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CLEARS THROAT

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No, no, no. It's me, too right, bro. Jibba...something or other.

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It's you all right.

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At least, I think it is.

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What's this machine thing?

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Ah, glad you asked.

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Ha ha ha!

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Ha ha ha!

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Excellent. My collection of henchmen is coming together nicely.

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Mwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!

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Oh, wackadoo! This is terrible.

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I've got to do something, Nevvie.

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Or Dev will be unstoppable.

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Too right, bro.

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Now I have two henchmen.

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Soon I shall have more.

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Then they'll have no choice but to do my bidding,

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and then we shall take over the world!

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Ha ha ha ha!

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Prank, run around and pretend to be choo-choo train.

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Chugga-chugga, chugga-chugga...

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Have you noticed every time he gives an order he plays those three notes?

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Yeah, yeah.

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We gotta find a way to fight back.

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Hmmm... I know, I know!

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Nice one, Nevvie! I know what you're thinking.

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It's time for us to do some inventing of our own.

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Yeah, yeah. Easy peasy.

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Yeah! Ow!

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Oh! Oh, oh, that's it.

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Oh, left a little bit.

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Ah!

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Oh, I need this massage.

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People don't realise but being evil really is very stressful work.

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Melanie, where are you?

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Oh, who's that?

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Melanie?

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Oh, Melanie, there you are.

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Do listen to your Auntie Barbara dear, and do stop playing about.

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We're going to go shopping.

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Shake a leg.

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Plank...

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Doing nothing as always, I see.

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Caretaker, caretaker, couldn't care less taker.

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What's wrong with everyone?

0:15:200:15:22

Well...

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Oh! There's little Nevvie the doggie!

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What?

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Who's a good little doggie, then?

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Excuse me!

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Will the clever little doggie do a trick for a treat?

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Oh, yes!

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Now that I have my three henchmen it's time to inform

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the Prime Minister of my intention to take over the world!

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Mwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!

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'Thank you for calling the taking over the world hotline.

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'You are currently being held in a queue.'

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MUSIC

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How dare they put me on hold?

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Prank, run into the wall!

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Mmm hmm...

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Barbara,

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bark like a dog.

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Woof woof!

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Woof woof woof!

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'Please continue to hold.

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'Your loopy plan for world domination is important to us.'

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Honestly, it's almost enough

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to make you not want to bother taking over the world.

0:16:330:16:37

Melanie, hang up the phone.

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Right, we'll have to ring back later.

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For the moment let's get on with actually taking over the world!

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No way, Jose!

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Ah, Nev. I see you've come back to try and stop me.

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You are as brave as you are foolish.

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BLOWS RASPBERRY

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Touche!

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I'm glad I'm not really related to a simpleton such as yourself.

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Confused.

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No, we're not really cousins at all.

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A man in prison told me how uncannily similar we looked.

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I vowed to drop by if I ever escaped.

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Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear.

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So what's under the sheet?

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Have you been inventing with your koala friend, Kris?

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It's Keith!

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Too right, bro.

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Ta-da!

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I was expecting something slightly more impressive than that thing.

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Can't scare me.

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Apparently not.

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Well, I'm a very busy villain, so...

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PLAYS PIANO

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Henchmen, capture Nev!

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Quick Nevvie, follow the plan!

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Aye, aye, Captain.

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No, buddy. It's more like dum-dum-dum!

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Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear.

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Stop!

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Nice one, Nevvie, you got it buddy!

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Ah! I see your little game, Nev.

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Well, it won't work.

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PLAYS PIANO

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Capture Nev!

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Booty shake!

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Drat!

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PLAYS PIANO

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Capture Nev...now!

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Oh, oh!

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PLAYS PIANO

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Ha ha!

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Uh!

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BLOWS RASPBERRY

0:19:160:19:18

Uh!

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Well, it appears we have reached what is known as a stalemate.

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Maybe not!

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Oh no. It's Pete.

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For the last time, it's Keith!

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Yeah, Krazy Keith! Ha ha!

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There's a big red button on the side of this machine, Nevvie.

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No, don't press that!

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ALARM BLASTS

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'Self-destruct sequence initialised.'

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Oh, fiddlesticks.

0:19:470:19:48

Why do I put self-destruct buttons on my inventions?

0:19:480:19:52

'Self destructing in three...

0:19:520:19:55

'..two...

0:19:560:19:57

'one.

0:19:570:19:59

'Have a great day!'

0:19:590:20:00

SNORING

0:20:100:20:12

THEY COUGH

0:20:120:20:15

Oh!

0:20:170:20:19

Oh! Quick, Nevvie! We can't let him get away.

0:20:240:20:28

Ha ha! I was smart enough to escape from prison,

0:20:300:20:34

smart enough to build my mind-control device, smart enough to escape you.

0:20:340:20:39

And all your simple-minded friends.

0:20:390:20:42

Even that fool, Barney, who let me into his apartment!

0:20:420:20:46

Mwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!

0:20:460:20:48

-Ha ha ha!

-Ha ha ha!

0:20:480:20:50

He's standing behind me, isn't he?

0:20:510:20:54

Too right, bro.

0:20:540:20:55

Yes, he is.

0:20:550:20:57

Jibbidy-ya!

0:20:570:20:59

Ha ha!

0:20:590:21:00

SIRENS WAIL

0:21:020:21:04

See you, Dev. Enjoy prison.

0:21:040:21:06

Ha ha ha ha!

0:21:060:21:08

Oh, I'll be back.

0:21:080:21:11

And I'll get you, Nev.

0:21:110:21:12

And you, Barney.

0:21:120:21:15

And that nuisance, Krazy Keith!

0:21:150:21:18

Ah, for the last time, it's...

0:21:180:21:20

Hang on, he got it right!

0:21:210:21:23

Er, it's MR Krazy Keith to you, buddy.

0:21:230:21:28

Uh!

0:21:280:21:31

NEV YAWNS

0:21:320:21:34

-I tell you what, it's been quite a day, eh, Nev?

-Too right, bro.

0:21:340:21:38

Your cousin turned out to be... Not your cousin,

0:21:380:21:41

an evil genius taking over the world. How do you feel being a hero?

0:21:410:21:45

Tip-toperoo!

0:21:450:21:47

With the reward money we can pay for the damage and buy a new table.

0:21:470:21:51

Yeah, yeah!

0:21:510:21:52

So it's all back to normal.

0:21:520:21:54

Well, nearly.

0:21:540:21:56

Time for one more quick song?

0:21:560:21:58

Groovy!

0:21:580:22:00

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:22:020:22:06

Email [email protected]

0:22:060:22:08

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