Episode 10 Disaster Chefs

Meet the Disaster Chefs, parents who are rubbish at cooking.

-Dinner, Charlie!

-Nooooo!

They make things like this, and this, and this!

Disgusting!

And foodie fanatic Stefan Gates is the only person who can help.

He's got just 24 hours to help them master a two-course meal

in a professional kitchen for some fierce critics.

Horrible.

Get cooking!

Will they rise like a souffle or flop like a pancake?

I've failed!

Will it be Yumm, or Yuck? Start your blenders!

Today's Disaster Chef is dad of three Moustafa

who lives in Southampton.

Eldest daughter, nine-year-old Mariam, is nuts about knitting,

but when it comes to food, Dad can't pull the wool over her eyes.

Dinner's ready!

Nooooooooooo!

Mum Shanaz juggles work with a PhD, so to help out,

Moustafa's taken charge of the kitchen.

Aarrgh! Burnt.

Now that is a disaster.

But Mariam's had enough charred chow.

In here is the oven, where he burns everything.

SMOKE ALARM BEEPS

Everything is burning! Where is this coming from? Arrgh!

And that's not the only problem.

Aargh!

Even when dad gets food in the pan, he's easily confused.

He always gets mixed up between sugar and salt,

and that's a big problem.

Yep, and he's no perfectionist either.

Argh! Too much. Too much.

Even when I follow the recipe,

then I just get bored and do whatever I want.

But this kitchen maverick does want to impress his family.

I love fishing, and I love cooking, too,

so it'll be great if I'll be able to cook my fish.

Mariam's little sister Malick doesn't hold back her views either.

I do not even want to look at it!

I can see why, but he's not one to give up.

Already burnt, I mean, nothing worse could happen.

Sometimes it turns really so bad,

either it's undercooked,

it's overcooked, it's burnt, so we end up having a pizza delivery.

Despite Dad's culinary catastrophes, his confidence is still sky-high.

I feel if someone showed me the little tricks how to do things,

I think I could be opening my own restaurant very soon.

Is he bonkers?

I don't think anyone, anyone, could teach my dad how to cook,

he's just too bad.

And what this Disaster Chef dad doesn't know yet,

is that tomorrow, he'll need to cook restaurant-standard food,

in a professional kitchen, for three surprise judges.

This is no ordinary job.

This is a job for a super food superhero, someone to rescue

kids across the UK from their mum and dad's disastrous dinners.

It's Stefan Gates!

That's a rubbish costume.

Oh, I see. Lovely.

But there's no time to waste...

..as this could be his biggest challenge yet.

Hi, Mariam.

Hi, Stefan. Nice slippers.

Thank you. Let's get to work.

Hi, Moustafa.

Hello, sir. Welcome.

Now, Mariam, you've got a bit of a problem with your dad's food,

haven't you?

Well, my dad usually either overcooks food or undercooks food.

Is this right?

I don't think so. I don't believe it.

He did salmon, but it wasn't cooked that well

so my mum had to go and cook it again.

This is outrageous.

Yeah, he cooked risotto last night. It wasn't that good.

There you go.

Oh, my word.

You would love it.

I'm going to be... Bleugh!

It looks like somebody's been sick in a pan.

Oops, sausage and salmon. Only a total buffoon would eat that.

No!

It's like a cross between porridge and clay,

sort of my mouth has seized up.

This is one of the worst cases I think I've ever seen.

OK.

So, Stefan's seen how bad Moustafa is,

but it's time to put it to the test.

It's the Rookie Challenge.

For Moustafa,

that means cooking an egg-xcellent meal in just five minutes.

Here are all the ingredients for poached eggs. OK, there we go.

To make the perfect poached eggs, add vinegar to swirling

boiling water, and drop the eggs straight in the middle.

Then toast the bread, and it should look a little like this.

You've got exactly five minutes, starting from now...

to cook me perfect poached eggs. Go for it.

OK, we'll squeeze in the corner here.

How we doing?

We've got four minutes left.

Gordon Ramsay swears, Jamie Oliver bish-bash-boshes,

and Moustafa sings. I think that's singing.

# Da-da-da-da! #

-Does he always make this horrible noise in the kitchen?

-Yeah.

There's only one thing for it.

Ear defenders.

Right, pop those on.

Hang on, that's cheating!

Stefan hasn't authorised that plastic poacher.

Mind you, I doubt it'll help him.

Three minutes left.

What is he thinking?

It's going to take for ever to cook in that thing.

Not the best start.

Two and a half minutes left.

Two minutes to cut this bread.

You'll need a flame thrower to toast bread that thick!

Are you forgetting something? It's not toasted.

With a minute left, Moustafa tries a more traditional technique,

but it's too little, too late.

OK, ten, let's give him a countdown.

Nine, eight, seven, six,

five, four, three, two, one.

-Stop!

-Stop it!

An egg-ceptional egg-xample of how not to do poached eggs.

# How do you like your eggs in the morning?

Cooked, for a start.

So we have a raw egg, a little bit of egg white, no toast.

This is the perfect poached eggs, OK? Beautifully held together,

and, I mean, the essential thing is they have been cooked.

Unlike your effort here, which is frankly atrocious.

Agreed.

Congratulations, Moustafa.

You truly are a complete and utter Disaster Chef.

How can you mess up a poached egg on toast?

All you have to do is poach the egg and toast the bread.

And he didn't do either.

In just 24 hours, he'll have to cook two courses

for three mystery judges,

who will decide whether his food is Yumm or Yuck.

-But is he up for it?

-Yeah, sure.

So, fail and you have to wear the hat for ever.

Succeed and you will be elevated to a whole new level. OK?

-Now, you and I, I think we need to go and choose the menu.

-Yep.

-You can clear this all up.

-OK.

Clearing, clearing, clearing.

While Moustafa tidies,

Stefan and Mariam head out for foodie inspiration.

But it's not your average shopping trip.

They're trying out one of Dad's favourite hobbies - fishing!

Ah!

So, what do you reckon we should get your dad to cook?

Well, my dad really likes salmon, he likes eating it a lot.

-He likes a bit of fish?

-Yeah.

-Yeah. Do you like fish?

-Yeah.

Well, that makes sense then, doesn't it? What are your favourite foods?

My favourite food is, like, sweet pastries.

Ah! Bit of pastry.

Do you know what, I think it's coming together in my mind.

With three discerning judges to impress,

Stefan and Mariam must push the boat out - well, their nets anyway -

to fish for some ideas.

I've got something!

Chocolate!

Ha-ha! Oh, yes, what have you got?

Rubber duck.

Quack-quack-quack.

I've got some potatoes!

Oooh, chips, lovely! What goes with that?

Oh, my gosh, oh, my gosh!

I've got it, I've got it! I've actually caught some fish!

Oh, fish that's so fresh it's still in the packet!

Oh, look at that! A message in a bottle.

"I've finished cleaning, love, Dad."

All right, we've got to go back. Come on, then.

Woo-hoo!

Yay!

After picking up some less wet ingredients,

Stefan must settle on his menu.

Fantastic, what have you got in there?

Raspberry, beetroot, butter.

Pastry. And this, look at that, fantastic loin of salmon.

Now it's time to reveal the menu to our Disaster Chef dad.

Hold on, that salmon's got a face!

Have a good smell, have a good feel. What does it feel like?

I think I know what it is.

OK, open your eyes.

Yeah, I know what it is.

What have you got there?

-Trout?

-Wrong!

It's a salmon. It's a beautiful, whole salmon.

Real beauty, I like it.

It's a little bit more complicated than that.

Uh-oh!

This is what you're going to be cooking.

For the main course, salmon and beetroot puff parcels

and potato flowers, and for dessert,

scrummy chocolate tower filled with a creamy fruity fool.

I'm hungry just looking at that.

But it's not going to be easy.

If Moustafa wants to cook his own fish,

impress Mariam and the judges, he'll have to work his socks off.

I feel pretty confident.

You're the only one. I remember that risotto.

Stefan's reputation's at stake too,

so he's showing him exactly how it should be done.

OK. Let's get cooking.

It's Stefan's Crash Course.

To make the perfect salmon and beetroot puff parcel,

use a ready filleted salmon.

Roll out the pastry. Chop beetroot and dill.

Lay on top of the salmon. Trim the edges.

Fold, flip and brush with egg wash.

Bake then serve with potato flowers, asparagus and horseradish dip. Easy.

If you're cooking, take care and always get permission

from your adult.

Slowly, slowly, slowly. Knife going straight down.

Fingers tucked, tucked back, OK,

otherwise you will take the edge of your finger off.

OK, that's... OK, slowly, slowly, slowly!

Slowly! It's like the start of an episode of Casualty.

Try the dill.

Really nice and slowly. Slowly! Slow down, slow down, slow down.

Apparently not. How about potatoes?

To make the perfect potato flower,

the spud should be pound coin-thick discs, so they cook evenly

and sit together well with the help of some melted butter.

This is very thick, that's why he hasn't got so many pieces.

Yeah, not good.

How we doing here?

£5. £5!

Hey, let's move onto something less dangerous. The pastry.

I've done this end. You can do the other end.

Getting the pastry right is key.

Too little and it'll be messy.

Too much and it'll be undercooked. Over to you, Moustafa!

OK, that's good.

OK. Neat, keep it nice and neat.

No! No! Argggh!

Calm down, Stefan!

OK, you've just sliced the end off here.

Oh, I suppose he has got his hands full with this one.

Key problem.

There's an extremely high likelihood that Moustafa

is going to slice a finger off, OK?

Key element, in cooking, knife skills,

and it's looking really bad at the moment.

He's got to slow down.

Stefan's salvaged the puff parcel, but Moustafa's potatoes are,

shall we say, a little on the crispy side.

On the whole, though, it's looking pretty good.

What do you reckon?

Good.

Are you feeling confident about this for tomorrow?

Yeah, very confident, I've done it many times before.

Now for my favourite bit - pudding!

For the perfect chocolate tower and fruit fool,

spread melted chocolate onto plastic.

Curl into a metal ring and set in the fridge with chocolate squiggles.

Whisk the cream, then add raspberry juice, mixing with icing sugar.

Pile crushed meringue, the fool and the fruit into the tower,

topped with a squiggle and a garnish.

What we're going to start with is your homework, OK?

So we look at your homework. Maths.

Erm, Stefan, I don't think you can eat that piece of paper.

Chuck that away.

What? Don't do this at home, kids!

Take that out, hold onto that for me, and chuck that away as well.

And we brush chocolate

all over the homework file, like that.

Yeah, my kind of homework.

A baked bean tin is the perfect mould

and means you can eat tonnes of beans, but be warned...

"Beans, beans, good for the heart. The more you eat, the more you..."

Oh, sorry.

Need to go a bit faster than that. That's stirring, you need to whisk.

So very, very gently, kind of bashing away like that.

See those bubbles getting there?

There you go. Come on, put some effort into it, man!

The key to a fab fruity fool is adding icing sugar

to raspberry juice when the cream's super stiff and not before,

otherwise it'll be slop central.

That, my friend, is how your dessert should look, OK?

Never in a hundred years!

OK, your training is complete.

Do you think I'm ready?

Not hugely!

I'm not convinced either,

but Moustafa's taking this very seriously.

I feel very confident, actually.

I need to sit down tonight, write everything down.

But there's homework to do, and it's not eating beans.

Remember to slow down. Revise those recipes.

Think about being a perfectionist, and please, please,

don't cut your fingers off.

I will try.

A chopped finger in his dinner wouldn't go down well.

But Mariam's got faith.

Well, I feel kind of confident about my dad tomorrow,

cos the food which he produced now is very, very good.

With two courses to make for three esteemed judges,

Moustafa has a late night ahead, as practice makes perfect,

or at least keeps his fingers intact.

Well, there's nothing more I can do.

Moustafa seems very, very confident.

He's about ten times more confident than I am.

What do I know?

Just 24 hours ago, most of Moustafa's meals were either soggy

or burnt, making daughter Mariam miserable.

So our super food superhero, Stefan Gates, took our Disaster Chef dad

under his culinary cape, and taught him a trick or two.

That's good, that's good. Well done. Well done.

Today, Moustafa must cook restaurant-standard food,

from a posh floating restaurant's professional kitchen.

He needs Yumms, not Yucks, from three surprise judges,

but will he sink or swim?

It could go either way on this one.

Right, time to get things ship-shape.

Now it's all aboard, and Moustafa must dress to impress,

as he's determined to dazzle his diners.

Hello!

-You look ridiculous!

-No, I'm fine!

Mariam is his waitress. He has a three-hour time limit.

What could possibly go wrong?

Three, two, one, get cooking!

Moustafa's homework rules were, revise the recipes, slow down,

and aim for perfection.

Time to put them into practice,

starting with pastry for the main, and he's already going wrong!

It's thick in the middle and very, very thin at the edges.

Try and do it the other way round.

Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh!

Bit of a problem. The pastry.

Now, what Moustafa's done is he's rolled the pastry, which is good,

but he hasn't done it properly.

He's left a huge lump of it in the middle, and tiny little ends.

If the pastry's uneven, thinner bits will burn

or thicker bits won't cook, and Moustafa's looks too short!

But he's not listening.

The hat must have gone to his head.

From now on, I'm going to call you chef.

That's a bit optimistic.

And after yesterday's frightening knife encounter, Stefan's leaving

nothing to chance, giving Moustafa a gadget used by the experts.

This is, essentially, chain mail.

So imagine you're a medieval knight, you're going to put that

over your hand, and this should stop you from cutting your fingers off.

I'm thinking less medieval knight, and more the king of pop himself,

Michael Jackson, as he's so "Bad" at chopping! Sorry.

# I'm bad, I'm bad... #

And now you can start chopping things, OK?

The pastry should also be neatly trimmed to cover the filling.

It's already uneven,

and at this rate it's not going to be big enough, either!

Very short round the edge, so I will try to come up with something.

From the man who thinks sausage and salmon is a good idea,

he should start over.

Instead, he's just sticking an extra bit on at the end.

I'm sure that's what proper chefs do as well.

This one first, or this one first?

Ah-ha! Someone's not done their homework!

Oh, well, as long as he covers the filling.

Oh.

Thought so.

Short.

Oh, we are short.

Disaster!

But I have experience with disasters.

OK, so I'm doing some patching here. Don't tell anyone.

My lips are sealed.

But Stefan might have something to say about it.

And what's happened here?

The little fella's just sitting on the edge there,

-what's that all about?

-This is, my friend, patching.

Patching. That's patch? On top, there.

There was a big hole, was there?

Nobody will notice.

Fingers crossed. With the puff parcel prepped, it's onto the spuds.

So that means the King of Pop - I mean, Moustafa -

must don the shiny glove again.

With just an hour left, it's time to up the stakes,

and reveal today's judges.

-So we thought...

-Feeling the pressure now.

I should hope so.

You should be. Judge One...

is National School Chef of the Year, Alison Gann.

If Alison doesn't know what kids like to eat, no-one does.

The perfect person to judge

if Moustafa's food's fit for Mariam or not.

So every day, I cook in the school for the children,

and I'm up against judgement a lot of the time.

So today, this cook better be good, or I will be on his case.

Making me feel nervous.

Me too.

Judge Two...

is CBBC's master of magic, Fergus Flanagan,

so Moustafa will need to work magic himself to impress Fergus.

If anything's a complete disaster today, I will be using my very

best magical skills to make that food vanish off the plate.

Ah! You know this guy? More nervous now.

Judge Three...

..is best friend and local radio presenter, Chris Wright,

who's escaped Moustafa's grub so far,

but their friendship doesn't mean he'll be holding back.

I'm a friend of the family, so I think they're hoping that

I will be nice, but I will have to be brutally honest,

and if I don't like it, I'll have to say, I don't like it.

Arrggh!

I have been doing a lot of effort,

putting a lot of effort into this and I hope they will like my food.

Well, get on with it then!

There's less than an hour to go,

and now Moustafa has to pass Stefan's dreaded spud test.

Size of your potatoes.

This is not fair. This is not....

This is what we're aiming for.

Around five pound coins.

-Hasn't quite cracked it, has he?

-No.

Maybe Moustafa's hoping if he supersizes the spuds,

he'll be quids in with the judges.

Better start running.

There's less than half an hour to go

and the pudding is still nowhere to be seen.

When the time's run out, whatever you have has to go on a plate

and head out there.

Really? They cannot wait, like, ten more minutes?

They're not waiting. That's all I'm saying.

OK. Thanks for the pressure.

As our judges settle themselves in, Moustafa's friends and family

arrive to laugh at...

I mean support him, including Mum, Shanaz.

I'm sure he's under very strong pressure today,

but I'm sure he will do it.

The judges will declare Dad's dishes either Yuck or Yumm.

It's the best of three, so two Yumms and he passes with flying colours.

Two or more Yucks and this Disaster Chef will be walking the plank.

Quite hungry now.

With time ticking, and hungry judges, Moustafa must ignore

Stefan's advice about slowing down, and hurry up prepping the pudding.

Remember, the first rule of a faultless creamy fruit fool

is whipping up the cream until it forms stiff peaks,

before adding the raspberry juice.

Just like...

No!!!

This should be turning into peaks. But still no peaks.

I wonder why?

Leave it a little bit.

Leaving things always helps, doesn't it?

Nooooo!!!

Big disaster. The fool is a nightmare.

It makes Moustafa look a bit of a fool, to be honest.

It should be light and fluffy and delicious and kind of floaty.

It's a big slurry.

And the chocolate's not working either.

Not melting. I don't know why it's not melting.

Just a suggestion, move the pan to the heat.

Oh, goodness. This should be on the back.

With less than ten minutes to go, the potatoes are more like,

well, potatoes than flowers.

The uneven slices mean they haven't stuck together.

So how you getting on?

Running out of time, that's the problem.

So the judges are up there waiting for their food.

You are now late at getting the food to the table,

so they're going to get more and more unhappy, as they wait.

Moustafa's salmon and beetroot puff parcels with potato flowers

should look like this and the judges are getting...

this. Not far off, I guess.

I'm very happy with what I've produced so far.

Kind of surprised myself.

And me!

Cos it looks stunning.

It does, I think you're right. OK, Mariam. Fingers crossed.

Take 'em away!

Big smile.

£10 each one.

Too late now.

Dinner's served!

-Lovely.

-Thank you very much.

Thank you. Lovely.

Wow.

I think they'll be impressed with the plating.

Lot of colour gone into it, so it looks pretty.

But will the judges think it's up to restaurant standard?

Salmon's beautifully cooked.

I like it.

That's very tasty. That is very nice.

It is. It tastes really nice, actually.

Result! But they're not the only ones judging Dad's dinner.

Promising?

What about the pastry?

I don't think it's cooked well.

Uh-oh!

20 minutes in the oven.

20 minutes would be fine, if it was the right thickness.

I like the glaze there, but I think because it's quite heavy inside it,

it's made it a little bit soggy.

Alison has her reservations, but they're still tucking in.

So I was a bit worried today that I was going to have to pull out

my best trick ever and make it all vanish, but I'm very happy.

Yes, it's easy to eat, actually.

It is.

Sounds like Chris will be inviting himself round for dinner now.

But most importantly, has it passed Mariam's taste test?

It's actually a bit better than what he usually does.

OK.

Yay! Praise indeed!

But that doesn't mean he's got time to waste.

There's no time to waste.

-I think you should start on the pudding.

-OK.

And Mariam's impressed.

Oh, wow.

That should look good, actually.

Look at that. I think you've done a brilliant job.

It looks great, it looks amazing.

But there's still the matter of that flimsy fool.

Here we go.

If we've got a really lovely nice, thick fool,

then it'll sit in there beautifully.

-Eugh!

-Even worse than yesterday.

Moustafa's challenge was to make

a scrummy chocolate tower

filled with a creamy fruity fool,

like this one we made earlier.

Spot the difference? But Moustafa can do no more.

Wow. Wow.

If I were the chef and eating this food,

probably I will never come here again.

So I'm guessing all the fool inside probably should have been

within the chocolate. I mean, it's fallen out here.

Not that I'm massively complaining but...

But you kind of are. But you are right.

Can't go wrong with chocolate, can you?

It's very light.

Tastes very nice.

They were really outstanded by the presentation.

Hey. Onto a winner.

Don't celebrate yet.

It's still got to live up to Mariam's standards.

It actually goes together.

The sweetness with the raspberries.

Too sweet, not too sweet?

Actually, it's good. Perfect.

The taste is fine, isn't it?

It's the texture that we've got a problem with.

Well, he's improved since he first started.

Yeah, I think he has to practise, like, being slow.

Yeah. Calm down a bit.

So that's what Mariam thinks. Now it's the judges' turn.

It's The Verdict!

24 hours ago, Mariam's Disaster Chef dad's food

was either overcooked or undercooked.

After learning from Stefan, he's whipped up a two-course meal,

in a professional kitchen, for Britain's Top School Chef, Alison.

CBBC presenter and magician, Fergus,

and Moustafa's best mate, Chris.

They'll judge Moustafa's meal on restaurant standards,

and give a Yumm or Yuck.

Two Yumms and he's a Disaster Chef no more.

Two Yucks, and both he and Stefan will have egg on their faces.

Thank you very much.

Judge number one.

Can we have your verdict, please?

School chef Alison spotted the soggy pastry,

but did the rest of the food win her over?

The dessert was a little bit too sickly.

However, the salmon was cooked perfectly.

Whaaaaat?!

How did that happen?

Magician Fergus liked the salmon,

but he wasn't keen on the pudding, so...?

Judge number two.

If it's a Yuck, it could go either way.

Another Yumm and he'll have only gone and flippin' done it!

It was a magnificent main.

Bit of a disastrous dessert, unfortunately.

Yumm!

Has he paid them, or something? I mean, bravo!

Shall we see if it's a clean sweep?

But best mate Chris is surely no fool when it comes to pudding.

I think the presentation was very good. The taste was good.

However...this.

Three out of three.

I don't believe it, I don't believe it!

Top man, well done. Well done.

I'm really thrilled, but I don't think they have eaten my food.

I don't either.

Somehow, despite the soggy pastry and sloppy fool,

Moustafa managed to magic up three Yumms.

It's a miracle!

You have a proper chef's crown!

Oh, look, he's even getting the posh chef's crown!

Get in!

Brilliant. Well done.

Moustafa may have been lucky enough to blag three Yumms,

but he's most certainly not an expert chef yet.

Hopefully he'll continue to improve, and make some amazing food

for Mariam, and maybe even cook his own fish one day.

I'm overwhelmed, actually. I didn't think I would get that, three Yumms.

This guy couldn't cook a thing, and now I think, today,

he's produced his very own bit of magic.

I think it's great that somebody that's not used to cooking

can actually produce something that good at that little length of time.

Just amazing. I think he did really, really well.

No more soggy risotto, definitely, and no more delivery pizza,

so, no, I'm confident now it's going to be like a new era now.

You're not the worst chef any more.

Yes! Yeeees! We pulled it off.

Mariam and I trained him up, we've un-Disaster Chef'd him!

Bye-bye.