Browse content similar to Episode 12. Check below for episodes and series from the same categories and more!
With a casing made of aluminium - We do apologise viewers, we seem to
have joined today's DNN at the end of the show. Please bear with us
while we investigate. Well, what a show THAT was! I still can't believe
that Camel survived. I know. And Justin Bieber
parachuting in. You really couldn't make it up.
Anyway, that's all from this series of DNN. I've been the outstanding
Felicity Bond. And I've been the hatstanding Bob
Roberts. Say goodbye, Bob.
Goodbye, Bob! So, where are you going for your holidays, Flicky?
Once again, we're very sorry, but we appear to have missed this week's
episode of DNN. However, you have been good enough to tune in, so
we'll leave the cameras rolling to give you an exclusive look at what
goes on in the studio after the show.
goes on in the studio after the Well done, everyone. See you all
next series, apart from the people I'm getting sacked. And
next series, apart from the people out this hatastrophe! So
next series, apart from the people Ha! What's this for? Snorkelling?
No. They're Ha! What's this for? Snorkelling?
You sleep in this? Yes,
You sleep in this? Whoa, whoa,
You sleep in this? That must mean there's a breaking
story from on-the-spot reporter Phil Tyme. You often miss the story,
Phil. But this week you've missed the entire show! We're off air! I
know that but this is one exclusive you're going to want to
know that but this is one exclusive I am standing outside the head
office of our late night sister show DNN, no nonsense nightly news live
as ever. More than ever. Thank you. I am here because you're not going
to believe what I found in my e-mails this morning. Yes, was it an
eagle? You can't send an eagle by e-mail, Bob. Heads up, everyone.
That eagle is still in my office. No, it was a private message, shh,
sent to me, privately by someone at DNNNNN. Get this they're finally
giving Henry Smart a cohost. What? Yes, I knew that would get your
attention, but brace yourself. There's more. The e-mail also says
they have had their eyes on DNN, and there is only one person for the
job. It's one of us people. Well, I'm not doing it. I don't think it's
you, Bob. Exactly. Don't touch what you can't afford. This is not just
breaking news. This is something that could change the face of DNN
forever. Me and Terry aren't budging until we get this amazing exclusive,
so watch this space, people. See you in a bit. Thanks, Phil. I don't
believe it. It's finally happening. What is happening? Tymal Mills? At
last!! Thank you, hair genie! No Bob, I mean I'm finally moving to
DNNNNNN. Er, hold on a sausage. What makes
you think you'll get the job? Er, who else is there?
What do you mean? Have you seen our show? This is Phil
time - live! Excuse me. I am on a date with Harry - no! Not in front
of the camera. Oh, sorry. Right. Can you get this out of my face? I am
trying to do some work here. Jahmene, I love the whole hand thing
you do. Boom! How about walk the dog? Let's walk the dog. This is not
appropriate for a journalist of my stature. Milk a cow. Let's milk a
appropriate for a journalist of my me to make the tea, don't
OK. Ahh! I am a very patient person with
a beautiful soul! Right. To you. Ahh! I am a very patient person with
Well, I, for one, cannot see what you're driving at. All seems
perfectly normal to me. Flying donkeys would seem normal to
you. Ah, yes. Uncle Dobbin - now that man
could flap. Can we get a feed open to the
DNNNNNN studio? Oh, please can we not? I've already
had three naps today. Ah - Hello, Felicity!
Hi, Henry. And hello, Bob.
Oh, told you. So what's all this I hear about you
getting a co-host from DNN, Henry? Well, that's certainly the rumour,
Felicity. Does this mean we'll be working together soon?
You think it'll be me, Henry? LAUGHTER
Well, I hope your ears are up to it. I genuinely have no idea who it's
going to be, Felicity, but rest assured, I have my fingers crossed.
I'll be in touch as soon as I hear anything.
Thank you, Henry. Oh, and bye-bye, Bob.
Missing you already, Henry. Oh, wait a minute. No, I'm not. Shaboom! Got
him! He's gone.
Oh. Well, I don't know what you're getting so excited about anyway.
Who'd want to be on DNNNNNN? It's so BORING.
They're the most credible news show on television, Bob. They've
interviewed Obama. Yes, and we've interviewed a llama.
What's your point?! We get great interviews! This is Gary oding for
DNN now joined by my complornsal friend Andy Murray. Who are you? You
look nothing like you do in the film. That's good. How long did the
makeup take? Um, it's a cartoon.I have never been to Roy MacEl-Roy's
birthday party. I think it's "-McIlroy". He picked you. No, he
picked you. Really?It doesn't matter. Mates before princesses.
Oggie! It's Gary Ogden - do you remember that? I think you have the
wrong bloke. Not number one, Lawson. I said number two, Lawson. You think
my name is Andy? I said number two, Lawson. You think
swimming stroke. No. I said number two, Lawson. You think
Spraggen. Sproggon. Spraggen. OK.
Spraggen. Sproggon. Spraggen. this? I need to think like a hose!
What's 57 rounded to the nearette 10th? 60. And don't even think about
squirting that thing at me. My hair is waterproof anyway. She goes in
through my nose and my head while I am asleep. It is called
visualisation. It really helps me get into the mind of the trees. If
you even touch that finger, I'll make sure you never work in TV
again. Don't think I won't! What are you supposed to be? Come off it,
Terry. It's clearly not real. Knock, knock. Who is there? What do you
want? Who sent you, and where is your identification? The
interrupting cow! I don't get it. No! You have offered to cycle around
for us today. No, I haven't. You're going out for the day, and then
suddenly you go, oh, no, I forgot to do my makeup. That would never
happen. Why not? Because I am not an idiot.
Wellll, I say potato, you say "potahto".
I do NOT say "potahto". Ah-hah! You just did! It's the lies
that hurt the most. Er, excuse me, FeliciBob, I was just
packing up all of my Harry Styles-abilia, and I overheard Gary
in the toilets. Oh, dear. Was it "nuclear pants
Wednesday"? What's "nuclear pants Wednesday"?
The day after "curried fajita Tuesday." Woo!
Eeewww! No, he was dishing some megagoss about one of us getting a
new job? Is it me? It's me, isn't it?!
Well, it could be anyone from the DNN family.
Right, stopface. Can I just say, you lot are NOT my family.
Yes, we are, little one. Phil's the bumbling uncle. Nellie's the strict
auntie. I guess Davina would be our crazy
cousin - twice removed. Yep, Jahmene's the teenage son. And
Gary's the family pet. Whoa - what does that make us?
Easy. You're mum and dad. Er, we are NOT mum and dad.
You're not actually my mother! Hey, don't talk to your mother like
that! Go to your room, Stacey Mayonnaise.
It's "Stacey-May ANAIS"! Argh, you are so annoying!!!
See? Family. are so annoying!!!
You're saying you actually want to work on the stuffiest news show in
You're saying you actually want to Right! Henry Smart
You're saying you actually want to Ah, you bunch of southern softies.
Anyway, I'm just giving the Ah, you bunch of southern softies.
She's got a point. They don't do THAT at DNNNNNN, Flicky. Here, we
let our viewers have their say. Calling him a moose is something so
silly to do. Why couldn't he have done a tree or Alan Titchmarsh? You
reckon Jedward are clones? They look the same, talk the same, have the
same hair. It's like they're twins! The best thing about packed lunches
is if there's something you don't like you swap it with friends for
crisps and desserts. I haven't managed to swap my bean salad, but
maybe one day. I love my packed lunches. I love them so much that I
even -- We take the news to Aye, it's true. And we don't just
listen. We take the news to THEM, an all.
Heel, Brian! Heel! Woaaaah! It can get seriously annoying and a
bit more-ish. Heel, Brian! Ahh! Say what you like about his work,
Jahmene Mann really knows his way around a good cup of tea.
You're not wrong, all unfortunately.
True. Seriously, have you forgotten your passport or something?! Get
out! Calm down, Bob. That must mean Phil
Tyme's got some news about the DNN- NN-NN job for us. What do you know,
Phil? No name I have found out one thing - it's
definitely a I have found out one thing - it's
it. I know. It's Factor, this, so that narrowing it
down to Stacey-May! Nellie - Davina! And you, Felicity. Slightly
down to Stacey-May! Nellie - Davina! running myself, but if you take me,
down to Stacey-May! Nellie - Davina! you've also got to take Terry, and
no-one who eats that you've also got to take Terry, and
in an enclosed space - disgusting, so the big boss is going to be out
in a few minutes, and we'll be waiting here, live and exclusively
for DNN. Don't go anywhere. Right. Let's have another looksee.
What's all this, Felicity? It's all my old hair, Bob. BOB:
Well, why are you taking it on holiday?
Because I'm worth it. You see, you constantly surprise me,
Felicity. That's why I think DNNNNNNNN - that's why "that show"
is a bad idea. At least here you never know what to expect. Come on.
Let's get this grey hair. Come on. Fly, Keith. Just to mind light! Oh,
Keith. This is Alan. My actual name is eeee! Eeeegh! No, the gh is
silent as in snowplow. Live on the banks of Snowdonia... Oh, wrong
specs. These are my head tray ones. No! My cape of justice will protect
us! Nice canoe, by the way. I was hoping
you wouldn't notice. What idiot runs security here? Ten-four, all quiet
here. My pleasure.My pleasure. No, it's my pleasure. It's my pleasure.
This is mega-anti-lol. My pleasure. My pleasure. Whoa, Felicity, you
didn't dell me you had a sister. My pleasure! My pleasure! Robert, do
you want me to come into the pleasure! My pleasure! Robert, do
and have words in person? Is that what you want? She's in your dress!
Turn it off. How is this my career? what you want? She's in your dress!
But don't you like stability, Bob? Of course I like you. And it's
pronounced Of course I like you. And it's
Right, damage control. If you DO get Of course I like you. And it's
drive. Gary Ogden. I'm doing it, daddy, I mean Benny.
drive. Gary Ogden. I'm doing it, Ogden. Smaller, smaller than that...
Gary Ogden. I am! Gary Ogden. OK, point taken.
That still leaves you with three solid professional choices. There's
Nellie, Stacey-May and Davina. So, clowns, are they hilarious or
terrifying? Or just people who've bought too much white foundation and
need to grow up? ! Tornadoes are going to rip through like the
judgmental mother-in-law looking for dust. Not done, you are very
unprofessional. I've got lozengers OK, don't think I won't use 'em.
There 'll be rain. I've not looked at the satellite aimages, but it's
Wales for an educated guess. I'm better than a bumblebee. Never put a
pun in my autocue again. In the glorious emerald paradise that is
Newcastle... ! You have ruined it. Like everything. This is the worst
holiday I've ever had. The main thing we've learned from all this is
not to mess with Nellie Osman. I hope you are listening, Robert. You
can't believe leave. Why not? Because of those three. Play the
tape. You have to have a heart of stone to leave
tape. You have to have a heart of # Just the two of us... #
There's an egg in my cup. Better. # Just the two of us... #
think Bob is the best # Just the two of us... #
anchor. Bob. I won. I don't know how to describe it. Like the USA, the
United States are awesome. to describe it. Like the USA, the
all of this is a dream. If it was a dream,
all of this is a dream. If it was a Once again, let go of my
all of this is a dream. If it was a about the news. That's better. Is
that a horse wearing trousers? Where? My mistake.All queue here.
Cancel that and send reinforcements. Happy place, Bob.
# Just the two of us... # Ought to Tutankhamen. That's how you
break the news. Look at him. I can tell he's thinking. There are three
Bs in Bob Roberts. Look, it was a lovely tape, Bob, but this is the
big break that I've been waiting for. Stay! I'll pay you. In belly
button fluff. Not an incentive, Bob. It's all I have. Would you stay if I
finally finish telling you about Nellie's unfortunate incident?
Maybe. Come on, hit me. No! I meant with the story. Oh, all
right. Kill the studio power, no screens, no curtains, no reflective
surfaces. I'm taking no chances with Nellie popping up.
So, where've we got to? We were heading to Buckingham Palace and she
didn't realise there was a Princess behind her. I tell a lie, it was
Lennox Lewis, but he was in a ball gown. In came the famous shoe
designer. Jimmy Choo?Bless you. Nellie goes to see the person
honourable friending the horn and it was bill Turnbull off Breakfast with
a bass guitar. Them they go on a road trip, drive up to the skinny
aisles. Scilly.I know! The camper van had been modified by that
footballer Robbie. Savage?No, he's nice. Before too long they realised
footballer Robbie. Savage?No, he's they'd taken a wrong turn. They
emerged from the sea, Nellie popped out to pick up a French pancake.
Cpepe? Anton Du Beke's blimp. Careful what
you say, Anton Du Beke's blimp. Careful what
no, no, no! Not now.What's it to be, Flicky?
job? Let's assume our position, Bob. OK, this is the big one. Do you know
who's got the job? Don't rush me, Felicity, it's my big
who's got the job? Don't rush me, because here comes the DNNNNNN big
boss right now. Please show your utmost respect for his Lordship,
little Alan Sugar. Hello, Phil. Hello, your grace, I believe you
have some news for me to break? I do. It's here. Thank you.No
problem. Back to the board room. Stay lucky, son.
This is proper exciting, this. What is all the noise? I can't hear
Harry. It's my business.Phil knows who got the job. Just tell us? All
right, all right, keep your very nice hair on! They say, and I quote
"this woman constantly demonstrates charm and astonishing journalistic
nous, as well as a staggering about ability to deal with Bob Roberts'
relentless rubbish". That's everyone on the show. Got a point there,
like. I can reveal the journalist who's landed the co- coanchor spot
on DNNNNNN is... Woah woah woah
I'm loving this, me. Here it comes. It's... Me... What? !What? ! You
have ruined me exclusive. That was an autobiographies lute shoe-in as
well. Cheese and crackers, man, I hate this job sometimes me. Terry,
start the van, we are going home and take them back. Unbelievable.
You got the job, but you are not allowed to be in
You got the job, but you are not more. Finally someone's acknowledged
You got the job, but you are not my skills and given me another
chance because I'm a professional. I've known about it for weeks. Can
someone get Henry. Is this true? I I've known about it for weeks. Can
you. Is that Louise Minchin from BBC Breakfast? EU missed
you. Is that Louise Minchin from BBC Great whosmt is it? Ellie Osmon.I'm
surprised, especially after the unfortunate business last year.
Thursday that was blown unfortunate business last year.
proportion. Not really. Let's not forget my friend Bill was there. He
even sent me some pictures. Have a look. It's appalling.A bit.
Seriously? How did they get an elephant up the Eiffel Tower? What
is it, Henry? I think you had better take a look at this. Is that Nellie?
What's Taylor swift doing on a bungee rope? Can't look. Sorry,
chaps, I've got to go. Some sports reporter's invited me to a barbecue,
he says we are close personal friends. Can't place him. Bye. Well,
this will not do, you are fired. No, please, I want to just be back in
the studio. So what happens now? Plan B.
Hey, Felicity Bond is nobody's Plan B. You are right. And anyway, I
couldn't leave you guys, I'm staying. Plan C then. Send her in.
You are mired! Hello. What? Who is that? Does she
work here? I've literally never seen her ball. Hello DNN studio, an
excellent decision. My reputation remains as untarnished as a freshly
ly starched pair of smalls. Now cut the link, you are wasting
electricity. You knead a hair cut! I can't believe it. Sticking with
us, Felicity? Yes, Bob, I am.So are you Nellie, I've got to say I'm
quite relieved. You are the best journalist here! Really?Bob!
quite relieved. You are the best is. And I promise I'll never mention
the unfortunate incident ever again. You promise. Thank you. Was that a
smile? No. Group hug. So until next time,
smile? No. Group hug. So until next irpressible Bob Roberts. Say
A sideways, upside down and back to front look at the week's headlines. Bob Roberts and Felicity Bond in the DNN newsroom as they look back at the news that's broken over the first series. The big story is that a change is coming at DNN. What could it be and who does it involve? It's the news, but not as you know it!