Episode 5 Hacker's CBBC Top Ten

# Oh, Top Ten!

# Mmm, yes! #

Hello, me almighty cockers!

Tis I, TV's very own Hacker T Dog,

and I'm counting down my top ten CBBC shows. But which will I choose?

There's only one way to find out, cockers! Follow me!

# Mm-mm-mm-mm-mm. #

At number six is Sam And Mark's Big Wind-Up.

Now, some people call them the poor man's Ant and Dec,

but I think that's unfair.

They're actually the poor man's Chuckle Brothers. Heh, ha, ha!

Sam and Mark once had me on their show,

and I was expecting the special guest star treatment.

And did I get it? Did I, budgies!

First of all, the limo they sent was only 20 feet long,

and the swimming pool on the roof wasn't even heated! I was furious.

I mean, I still had a quick swim.

It was even worse when I got to the studio, you know.

I told everyone that they weren't allowed to look me in the eye,

oh, yes! But then I got there and someone did look me in the eye!

I said, "Hey! Are you looking me in the eye?", and he said, "No!

"I'm not looking you in the eye", and I said, "You are, you're looking

"me in the eye!", and he said, "I'm not looking you in the eye!".

I said, "Look me in the eye when you say that."

So he looked in the eye and said that, so I had him fired on the

spot, and then I realised I'd been looking in a mirror the whole time.

Anyway, after I gave myself my job back,

I had a little look in my dressing room and I thought, "Oh!

"Look at the state of this! It's a right mess!"

so I marched up to Sam and Mark and said,

"I'm not an animal!" and they said, "You are an animal," and I said...

-IN SQUEALING HIGH VOICE:

-"I am! I'm an animal!"

So I fired myself again and went home, and that's why, in my top

ten list of CBBC shows, Sam and Mark's Big Wind-Up is number six.

Especially the one with me in it!

HE SNIFFS

CHEESY MUSIC