No Good Deed... League of Super Evil


No Good Deed...

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-DOOMAGEDDON SNARLS

-Look! A tasty Doomhound vitamin!

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Oh, no, the worst-tasting vitamin ever!

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I'm so glad three guys aren't about to force me to eat this.

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Ugh!

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Ooh!

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VOLTAR GIBBERS

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Huh.

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DOOMAGEDDON CHUCKLES

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VOLTAR LAUGHS MANIACALLY

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-Hee-hee.

-Oh?

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-Huh?

-Oh!

-Wah!

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MAN WHISTLES CHEERILY

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Excuse me, unsuspecting citizen,

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are you aware of our store's free photo-developing policy, hmm?

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You're not a store! That's a refrigerator box.

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Plus my camera is digital.

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Oi!

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My neck hurts.

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I have knee marks in my ears.

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Oh, pish-posh! A sore neck and waxy knees is a small price to pay

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for seeing everyone's private photos.

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Photos that will give us the secrets of everyone in Metro Town!

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The combination to every safe,

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the recipe for the secret syrup at The Waffle Pit.

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ANGELIC MUSIC PLAYS

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ALL: Mmm! Waffle Pit.

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SCREAM!

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SQUEAK!

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The bunny! It heard every detail of our top-secret scheme! Grab it!

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Huh?

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BOING! BOING! BOING!

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RABBIT SIGHS

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Get it! Get back here! Get the bunny!

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ZZZ!

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-Got ya, Bunny!

-Oh! Those nice men saved that bunny!

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PEOPLE CLAMOUR

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Who? Wh-What? Who are you calling "nice men"?

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The beast was spying on our nefarious plan.

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Someone dove in front of a flaming bus and saved a bunny?

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GASPS AND APPLAUSE You take that back!

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CHEERS AND WHISTLES

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FUNKY MUSIC PLAYS

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TYRES SCREECH

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Don't worry, Voltar. When word of tonight's caper gets out,

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everyone will know how evil and not good we are.

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OK. Here's the plan. At 10:15, cut the alarm.

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10:30, break into the bank.

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Once we're in the bank, there's only a flimsy

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six-foot reinforced concrete wall between us and The Waffle Pit! Ha!

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THEY LAUGH MANIACALLY

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Soon, their super-secret syrup recipe will be OURS!

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DRAMATIC HEIST MUSIC PLAYS

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PEOPLE CHEER

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Whiskers wanted to thank you again

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and kiss you all with his little wet nose.

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Excuse me, are those shovels to dig a playground for Bunny?

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What?! NO!

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LISTEN TO ME!

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I didn't work hard all my life -

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cheating, lying and borrowing without asking -

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to be treated like a hero!

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They're so humble... just like the White Knight!

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-CHEERS

-Listen, it was ONE bunny!

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We just picked it up.

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Before a train hit it! CHEERS

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News just in - the four bunny-saving heroes

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are being honoured with the key to the city.

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The White Knight himself is coming out of retirement to present it.

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Let's hug them and their bunny-playground-digging shovel!

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Oh, no!

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Ugh! All these adoring fans are giving me a headache.

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Eeek!

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Um...what's all this?

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RED MENACE GIGGLES NERVOUSLY

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Uh...tokens of civic gratitude.

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Free surplus cushions from Cushion Barn.

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Oh! Porksicles from Pigs Of Plenty!

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Ho-ho! And...

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free mobile phones... if we sign up for a five-year plan.

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DOKTOR FROGG GASPS

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A month's worth of syrup and waffles from The Waffle Pit!

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We don't want their syrup.

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-Slurp! We don't?

-No.

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We're scheming to get that recipe ourselves. This is the final straw!

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We have to do something so nefariously evil,

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in public, that no-one ever gives us a freebie again!

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Oh!

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Hmm. Maybe the key to the city isn't SUCH a bad thing.

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No, Frogg!

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I refuse to accept something that represents all that we despise.

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We are NOTHING LIKE the White Knight!

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ANGELIC MUSIC PLAYS

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Grr!

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VOLTAR CHUCKLES Ya!

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-WHISTLE BLOWS

-All clean!

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Hmm.

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Wait a minute!

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What if we pretend to accept the key,

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letting us cleverly befoul Mr Hero here

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in a way this city will never forget?! And NEVER forgive.

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Ooh!

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Agh!

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VOLTAR CHUCKLES

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Disguise the mud puddle.

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DOKTOR FROGG LAUGHS MANIACALLY

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Excuse us, Mr Security Person.

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-We wondered if...?

-Oh, it's the heroes!

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Here to look around? Go ahead. Touch anything you want.

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Climb the scaffolding. Hey, want to borrow my security badge

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-and the secret map of the Limo route?

-Hee-hee!

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You don't even want to look at our suspicious milkshake?

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From the first moment I saw them,

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I knew they were heroes to be admired.

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I know you've come to love them as much as I do.

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CHEERS

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Today we thank them for their many acts of animal kindness

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and selfless heroism.

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CHEERS

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Hmm, let's see how much they love us in 30 seconds!

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RED MENACE LAUGHS EXCITEDLY

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I can't believe the White Knight himself

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-will be...standing on this stage!

-Ooh-aargh!

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Oh, he won't be white for long, Red...or standing!

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Frogg, arm the remote!

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MANIACAL LAUGHTER

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-The batteries are dead.

-Oh, push the button harder.

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It doesn't matter how HARD you push it if the batteries are dead!

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Here, let me try.

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-Red!

-Oops!

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Now look what you've done!

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-CHEERS

-The White Knight!

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Do right, like the knight.

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Oh, er, not yet, sir.

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With no mud puddle, we have to accept the key.

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Well, it will look good over the fireplace and we did save the bunny.

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We didn't save the bunny!

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We are despicable and untrustworthy.

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We can't trade all that for some...key!

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This key opens every back door in our fair city.

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Oh! Including The Waffle Pit!

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KERCHING! Yes!

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The key. Give us the key.

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CHEERS

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-Uh...now, sir.

-WHITE KNIGHT SNORES

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Sir?

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ALL: Oh!

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Where's my key?!

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Did you SEE that? He saved the White Knight!

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CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

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Do right, like the Knight.

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-Whoa!

-Yeah! Woo-hoo!

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Cool!

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No, Red, this is not cool.

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Wah! Definitely not cool!

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Let's hear it once again for THE HEROES!

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CROWD CHANTS: Heroes! Heroes! Heroes!

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I am not a hero! No!

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I am a villain, do you hear me? I am a villain!

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A VILLAIN!

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VOLTAR BAWLS

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Subtitles by Laura Moodie Red Bee Media Ltd 2010

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E-mail [email protected]

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