Not So Perfect Storm Lockie Leonard


Not So Perfect Storm

Live action comedy series. A big wave is approaching and Lockie and Mel prepare to ride it together. Phillip's niggling doubt about Mel's true identity returns.


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Transcript


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# Worlds away from anyone

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# They were burning themselves out in the sun

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# Worlds away from anyone

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# They were burning themselves out in the sun

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# There was just enough to get that far away. #

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'The weather, like life,

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'can be totally unpredictable.

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'One minute, everything's fine and calm,

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'then from out of nowhere, you're caught in a perfect storm.

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'Suddenly, you're in big trouble and it's nothing you could have ever seen coming.

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'Looking back, it all started with the promise of a massive swell.'

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-Hey, I haven't finished that!

-You have now.

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You seen the surf report? Predicting a ten foot swell.

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I don't know. Ten foot is seriously serious.

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-Maybe I'm not ready to surf through waves yet.

-I think you are.

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-Really?

-Pity we only have one board between us.

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-Don't worry about that. Sir, have you finished with that?

-No.

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Give that back here! There was one sip left!

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You owe me 20 cents!

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-I'd be careful if I was you.

-10 foot swell doesn't faze me.

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I wasn't talking about the waves.

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'Even Egg could see the storm brewing.'

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TANNOY: And now it's time for the Wacky Weather Report

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with Radio Angelus' resident wackster Geoffrey Egg Eggleston.

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OK, folks, it's time to put on those hats.

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We've got one mean cold front coming our way. I'm talking mad winds,

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crazy rains and bucketloads of emotional turbulence!

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'Come on, come on. Time is money.'

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'Dark clouds have been hovering over the Streetons for a while now.

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I'll be paying a photographer by the hour. Don't dawdle tomorrow!

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Careful! Vicki, I want you and Josh on either side

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-of your grandmother.

-You mean Mum?

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For the purposes of the photo shoot, she's your grandmother

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and you and Josh are her favourite grandchildren.

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Where are you planning on building this retirement village?

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I'm building "lifestyle opportunities for the young at heart".

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Right there.

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Of course, we'll have to Photoshop an artist's sketch for the brochure.

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-Come on.

-Right next to the Leonards' house.

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In three years' time, that house will be the site

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of the new Lifestyle Recreation Centre.

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Everybody in Angelus will have access to its state-of-the-art facilities,

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-for a small fee.

-What about Lockie's family?

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You cant stand in the way of progress. You get trampled on.

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-Well, smile for the camera then.

-Smile!

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-Smile!

-Smile, Vicki!

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Smile, Vicki!

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Click!

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Perfect!

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-Lockie here?

-How did you get in here?

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And why are you wearing a raincoat? It's sunny.

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Yum, are these tuna?

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What's going on?

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I've got something to show you. I've been keeping it a secret.

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It's time I came clean.

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-We can go to my bedroom.

-Bathroom would be better.

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Alright.

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'Ever since Phillip first met Mel,

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'he'd never quite got the idea out of his head that Mel was a mermaid.'

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There's something weird about that girl. I can't put my finger on it.

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Yes, finally someone else sees it.

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What am I seeing?

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It all adds up. Mel loves eating fish,

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she wears a raincoat because she's terrified of getting wet.

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Surely Lockie would have realised by now. They surf together every day.

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Of course! Wetsuit!

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Mel wears a wetsuit causing insufficient surface area

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of her bare legs to have contact with the water.

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-Preventing a complete metamorphosis.

-Exactly!

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-What do you propose she wants to show Lockie in private?

-Her tail.

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Bathrooms have water. She'll need it so her tail will grow.

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-'I wasn't expecting this.

-Do you like it?

-It's awesome.

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-'It'll help you track through the waves.

-It's designed to do that.'

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(That is so cool, a real-life mermaid. Who'd have thought it!)

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Hey, boys.

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-What are you two up to?

-BOTH: Nothing.

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We need to keep this to ourselves.

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Word gets out Mel's a mermaid,

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she'll be preserved in embalming fluid and stuffed in a museum.

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We need to formulate a plan.

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-Where did you get it?

-A second-hand shop. Just bought it.

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-Needs a bit of a wash.

-It's so cool!

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Except no leg rope.

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I've got one in my room.

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Must have cost a packet.

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7,000 cans.

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I collected 70 cans a day for 100 days.

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-100 days!

-I started the day I first saw you surf.

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'Freeze frame for a minute. That right there - clue number one.

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'Mel was trying to tell me something

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'and it wasn't about recycling, surfboards or mermaids

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'but all I could say in return was...'

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-Here it is.

-Oh.

-It's OK. I'll attach it for you.

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There you go.

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'OK, that was clue number two.

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'Mel had never gone to such an effort to look like... Well, a girl.

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'Not that I noticed.'

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Do you mind? I just ironed that.

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Sorry. Whatever his highness wants(!)

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Are you alright?

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Just thought you'd be more excited about the board.

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It's excellent. I love it. The best! I love you for buying it.

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Really?

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You're kidding, right? So did you mean what you said

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-about us being ready to surf that wave together?

-Yeah.

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Of course. Why wouldn't I?

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'OK, stop.

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'This here, clue number three.

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'It would have been pretty obvious to most people, except me.'

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Are you alright?

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-See you.

-Mel...

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Yeah.

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-Your board.

-Right.

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Thanks.

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EGG: We've got a bolt from the blue for you today, folks.

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An unseasonable low pressure crush front.

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It's hard to predict how things pan out.

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It could be blue skies ahead, or it could turn nasty, nasty, nasty!

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'The question is, what are you going to do about it?'

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I don't know. Mel's great to hang out with.

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She likes to surf.

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She's a mate.

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-But Mel comes with unique complications.

-You're telling me!

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She's cool...but crazy.

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You mean, you're not sure if you belong in her world,

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if that's what you want for yourself.

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'That was weird. My brother's advice almost made sense for once.'

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Who says you can't have a mate as a girlfriend?

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It actually makes sense.

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It doesn't have to be confusing or weird.

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-Maybe I do belong in her world.

-Just think that through. In full.

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OK?

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Night, Phillip.

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Night, Lock.

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-Ten foot swell, eh?

-Yeah. The surf should be awesome.

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-Young Mel, is she up for the challenge?

-I think so.

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We'll find out, I suppose.

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Monster swell like that will be a baptism by fire.

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Hey, Sarge, how do you know when it's time to ride the big wave

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-with someone?

-Just as the wave's cresting, you're padding and...

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-Wait a second, you're the expert.

-No, not that kind of wave.

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The other kind of wave.

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Oh, that kind of wave.

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Well...you just know.

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Well, say you don't "just know". Not 100%.

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Maybe...99.98%.

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Well, if you go into it with an open and truthful heart,

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what can go wrong?

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-Open heart?

-If you don't go into it with a completely open heart...

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It's like if you had the best surfboard but it had a ding in it,

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and no matter how much you tried to patch it,

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it never felt quite right.

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'You've got to hand it to the Sarge,

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'he always comes up trumps when it comes to good advice.

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'I took him at his word. I opened up my heart to Mel.'

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KNOCKS ON WINDOW

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Lockie!

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-Are you alright?

-Yeah. I'm more than alright!

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So are you.

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So, erm... you still want to ride that wave?

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Because if you do, I really want to too.

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Sure. Straight after you change out of your pyjamas.

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I must have had something else on my mind.

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-See you later.

-Lockie...

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'Stop stressing Vicki. The Leonards will find another place.'

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You have to talk to Dad. He listens to you. Get him to end the deal.

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I can't do that. It's the whole reason I'm here.

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I thought you were here because of me.

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Of course. I'm here to help you and your family.

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I mean it's not as if you're going to meet anyone useful in this town.

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Just as well your parents sent you to Redmont.

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-That's not why they sent me there.

-Why else do you think they did?

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Come on, Vicki. You know how things work in our world.

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The fact we like each other is an added incentive.

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Ice cream?

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I should probably go. I promised your dad I'd look over the blueprints.

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Of all the girls my parents set me up with, you're by far the nicest.

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I need to know whether I should take this up before the photo shoot.

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Why did you and Dad send me to boarding school? Be honest.

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The facilities, of course.

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The solar powered media centre is world class. Now...the dress.

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Vicki, come back here.

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Seems that not only is Mel a mermaid,

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-she intends to turn Lockie into a merman.

-Wow!

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-I think I need to have words with Mel.

-Best tread carefully.

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It says here that mermaids can be vengeful

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and can have powers that can include controlling the weather.

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Get on her bad side and who knows what we're up against.

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-Ready to go?

-Course I am. What could go wrong?

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KNOCK ON DOOR

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EGG: Cyclone alert, cyclone alert!

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Hi.

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-STRONG WIND BLOWS

-'He plans to redevelop it all.'

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The swamp, this house. Everything. Into a retirement village.

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Really?

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Who in their right mind would want to live in a swamp?

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You do.

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Well, yes. But who else would be crazy enough to?

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Dad's really serious about this. You should be worried.

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I am worried, love.

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I'm worried about you.

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'You'd think I'd care a little more about my house being levelled,

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'but I'd never seen Vicki so upset. It knocked the wind out of me.'

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Tissues and tea.

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'I figured Mel could wait for five minutes.'

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Sometimes it's just too...

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-Too...

-Too.

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-And I can't... I can't...

-Can't. You just can't.

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'Time was ticking away. I had to get to the beach.

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'Surely they'd had enough tea and tissues by now.'

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I got your message. Victoria, we'd best be off.

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I'm sure Mrs Leonard has housework to do. Lots of housework.

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I'm staying here.

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No, you are not, young lady!

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So... Who's for a cup of tea, then?

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Lockie, would you do the honours?

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Need a hand?

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No. I'm... I'm fine, thanks.

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'I couldn't look at her, Vicki was like the Medusa.

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'One look in her eyes and I'd be gone.'

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-What are you looking for?

-The, erm...tea.

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It's on the bench. Near the kettle. With the sugar and the milk.

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Oh...right.

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Thanks.

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Sorry for storming over. Didn't know where else to go.

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You were going surfing! Don't let me stop you.

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No, it's okay, you're not stopping me.

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The surf can wait.

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Vicky needs to know you're there.

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Of course I'm there. We sleep under the same roof.

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I've always found a hug goes a long way.

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Victoria.

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Mum.

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Victoria.

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Mum?

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Well, we best be off, then.

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It'll take a while for things to settle,

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they need to ride it out.

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Right.

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The wave? Mel!

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-I can explain!

-You're the reason I bought this.

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What happened?

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After my surfing buddy didn't show? I went in.

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I tried to surf the big wave. I didn't make it pass the brake.

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You're still the champion surfer in Angelus.

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Here's your trophy!

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I really am sorry. Vicky needed me.

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I was right the first time I met you. You really are an octopus.

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She had stuff going on. Major stuff.

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Here I am back in the beginning in trouble with Mel.

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I had a brilliant plan. How can she not laugh at my suit?

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Mel wasn't the only one in a mood.

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The weather had thrown a fit and Joe thought it was no coincidence.

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I estimate five hundred revelations per minute.

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That's over fifty kilometers per hour.

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That's gale force conditions.

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-The perfect storm.

-It's all Lockie's fault.

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We need to do something to make it up to Mel.

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The people of Angelus are depending on us.

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Vicky!

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Got any tissues?

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All out!

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-What's with the suit?

-This is no suit. I'm an octopus.

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Arms and legs going everywhere. No spine.

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I guess that makes two spineless people walking around.

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I started going out with a boy

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before I broke up with the old one.

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That's something an octopus would do.

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Because of that, you think you can take my crown?

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They can make calamari out of me to feed China

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and they are hungry people.

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Lockie, calamari rings are made of squid.

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Do squid have spines?

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I don't think so.

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You can be a squid then.

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Deal!

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I didn't want to break up with you

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but I didn't want to stay with you.

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-When we're together, we're just..

-Yeah.

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With Josh, it was just smooth sailing.

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I thought that's what I wanted. But apparently...

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You broke up with him.

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I had this dream. I was on a beach

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except the sand was made up of Brazil nuts and macadamias.

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I was made of marshmallow.

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You were there, surfing on this giant wave of melted chocolate.

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I was standing, I could see you coming,

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and there's nothing I can do to stop it.

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-So, together, we are like..

-Rocky road.

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Phillip and Joe decided a peace offering was the way forward.

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Do you think this will work?

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We've established she loves Gino. It can't fail.

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Change of venue. We're going to do the photo shoot in here.

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Where's Vicky? The photographer will be here.

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Victoria?

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I need to speak. Vicky's broken up with Josh.

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-I forbid it.

-It's okay. The deal's still on.

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I want Victoria in that dress ASAP.

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I'm not wearing that dress.

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'Course you are, kitten.

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You sent me to boarding school

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so I'd meet boys and you could do deals with the parents.

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It ends now.

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Listen to me.

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Mrs Streeton did something Vicky didn't expect.

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No, Barry. We can't force her to do something she objects to.

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She's our daughter.

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Put on that dress Victoria now!

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-If you want me in the brochure, photo shoot me in.

-Me too!

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What is going on with you?

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The storm clouds had parted from the Streeton house.

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In fact, it was happening all over town.

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We did it! Angelus is safe!

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We can't get too ahead of ourselves. Lockie might stuff it up again.

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The low pressure has moved on as quickly as it came.

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Expect settled weather. It's too early to predict.

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Don't tuck those raincoats away too soon.

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For once, the weather forecast was right.

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Mel and I had stormy days ahead of us.

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Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:23:000:23:03

A big swell is approaching Angelus, and Lockie and Mel prepare to ride the big wave together. But it soon becomes apparent this wave represents much more than just surfing. Phillip's niggling doubt about Mel's true identity returns, while Vicki comes to realise the cold reality of her relationship with Josh.


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