Episode 3 Ludus

I want a skinny baby mocha choccachino, extra hot, extra shot.

Stat. ..Hi! I'm Ludus.

You know, you guys are so tech savvy these days

so I've used my big old brain to invent this game.

I've turned the friends and family of three Earth twerps

into holograms. Horror show!

The Earth twerps are now flying to the levels of Ludus

to play my games and rescue their loved ones.

You want to play too? Then download my free app from the CBBC website.

Time to take on the levels of Ludus!

Welcome on board the Herculean.

I'm the ship's computer and your guide through the levels of Ludus.

My data processing is detecting the presence of three gamers

from the Earth location of Newcastle.

Gamer number one, Asmaa. Ten Earth years old.

A quick-witted gamer whose ambition is to be a novelist.

Gamer number two, Arthur. Ten Earth years old.

Has an extensive tie collection and he hates to lose.

Gamer number three, Roman. 11 Earth years old.

A highly competitive and determined gamer.

Gamers, you have been experiencing hyper sleep

and are now flying through deep space.

We don't have much time before your mission begins

so prepare for your briefing.

Your mission is to rescue your friends and family

who have been turned into holograms by Ludus.

To rescue them you must visit six levels,

each with a different game to play.

Win, and you will save your friend in a holobox to download on Earth.

Lose, and they will be uploaded into Ludus's game for ever.

Time to find out who you are playing to save.

-Asmaa.

-I'm going to play for my mum

and my friend Khadija.

-Arthur.

-I'm going to play for my dad

and my annoying brother Jacob.

-Roman.

-I'm playing for my mum

and my brother Lucas.

Are you ready to take on the levels of Ludus?

-ALL:

-Yes!

Then, Pilot, let's fly to level one.

It's nearly time for level one.

Download my app and play along.

Download the app now.

Game begins shortly.

We are now docking at level one.

This is a multi-player game. Prepare to disembark.

Collecting data.

Team comprises of two males and one female.

Confidence levels - 75%.

Gaming skills - unknown.

All team members displaying positive mental attitude.

Status - ready.

Hello, Earth twerps.

It's always great to see a fresh team,

brimming with hope and dreams... that I could crush.

-Do you know what's going down?

-ALL:

-Yes.

You're supposed to lose, and we're supposed to win.

Oh, so you think you're going to win? Interesting.

Are you ready to take on my game?

-ALL:

-Yes!

Let's get this show on the rocket launcher.

Here's level one.

In this game you need to fire and defend.

You must fire your ticks into the six targets. Easy squeezy, right?

Wrong!

Because my bugs are going to kick your ticks back out.

Defend your ticks by firing at the bugs.

You need six ticks in place at the end of 60 seconds.

If you win, you'll save one of your precious Earth twerps.

Lose, and they'll be uploaded into my game...for ever.

So, who are you going to play for?

Will it be Asmaa's mum or friend Khadija,

Arthur's dad or annoying brother Jacob,

or Roman's mum or brother Lucas?

Ride the surf, Lucas.

-My annoying brother.

-Yeah, your annoying brother.

-OK.

-We're going with Arthur's annoying brother.

No, he does look annoying - hah!

Take your place at the table.

Gamers, you have 60 seconds to win back Arthur's brother.

Are you ready at home? The game begins in three, two, one, go!

-Oh, God.

-Oh, yes, we won it!

Oh, no, they got two in.

-OK, get it in that one.

-Yes!

-Another bug.

-Yes!

Now another two.

-These guys are good.

-Get the bug!

-Yes!

Get the one round the corner, hit the sides.

Roman's talking tactics. Irritating!

40 seconds.

Oh, no, they've got them all in!

Yeah, but I wouldn't relax just yet.

Now they have to defend their ticks from my oncoming bugs.

-30 seconds.

-Here comes my bug Ralph to cause some trouble.

Oh, good work, Ralph! Really good. They got another two in.

That one there. That one there. That one there. Yes!

No, no, we're running out of time, we're running out of time.

-Yes, Arthur, you're running out of time.

-Yes, we got it!

-Bugs, did you hear that?

-Ten, nine...

-Are they going to do it?

Bugs, bugs, there's only five seconds to go!

Will they do it? This is bad.

-Bugs, where were you?!

-Gamers, you have won.

How did you do that?

-Well, team work...

-We're awesome, but you're not really.

I don't care anyway. You know, I'm glad you won Jacob.

He's annoying. We all agreed anyway, didn't we, huh?

Keep him!

You can now collect your holobox and return to the Herculean.

-ALL:

-Yeah!

Congratulations, gamers. You have won.

Arthur, you can now load your annoying brother Jacob

into the holoport to download later.

Are you ready for the next level?

-ALL:

-Yes!

Pilot, we are ready for take-off.

So let's fly to level two.

The next level is a single-player game. Captain's log.

Gamers are displaying odd human behaviour.

Note - Arthur trying to lay an egg.

Possible diagnosis - space fever.

Further analysis required on both male gamers.

Therefore selecting Asmaa for the next game.

We are now docking at level two.

Asmaa is a fantastic cook and makes the best cupcakes,

but we're in space so baking won't be much help.

Hey, Asmaa.

Welcome to level two where you'll probably lose.

I'm going to win.

Oh, really? Let's run the rules.

You will see a series of eight bugs.

You have to memorise them then pick them

out of the crowd in just 60 seconds.

Make a wrong choice and the bugs will scramble.

Win, and you'll save one of your precious Earth twerps.

Lose, and they'll be uploaded into my game for ever.

So, Asmaa, who are you going to play for?

Will it be your mum or friend Khadija,

Arthur's dad,

or Roman's mum or brother Lucas? Who are you going to choose?

Khadija.

Welcome to the party, Khadija!

Don't get comfy - you won't be staying.

Take your place at the table.

Gamer, you have 60 seconds to win back your friend Khadija.

Are you ready at home? The game begins in three, two, one, go.

Look at Asmaa.

Thinking and remembering and looking and concentrating.

But will her tiny brain remember all eight bugs?

Doubtful!

She's got three in a row!

This girl's fast!

-30 seconds.

-What?! And another three!

Wow, that's her seventh bug.

Oh, I knew you couldn't be that good.

20 seconds.

Yeah, take your time, Asmaa.

Will she do it?

She only needs to find one more bug to win

but there's only ten seconds left.

Will she find the last one... Oh, she's done it!

Gamer, you have won.

Whoa! You won that super fast! You must be a genius.

You're right about that.

-Do you feel happy?

-Overwhelmed.

I feel so overwhelmed too. I might pee my pants!

Urrgh!

You can now collect your holobox and return to the Herculean.

Congratulations, gamer. You've saved your friend Khadija.

Asmaa, you can now load your friend into the holoport to download later.

Pilot, we are ready for take-off.

I can confirm the Herculean is presently hurtling

towards level three.

Captain's log - gamers are still displaying odd behaviour.

Roman has reverted to the age of two Earth years

and is demonstrating an epic toddler tantrum.

He looks like Ludus having a hissy fit.

The Herculean is approaching the docking station.

Gamers standing by.

The team have won two of their friends and family.

Can they win a third? Confidence levels are at an all-time high.

Oh, not you three again. I'd have thought you'd have given up by now.

Come on, can we just play our game now?

Just to let you know we don't give up.

I got a bad feeling about you three.

Or it could be all those cheese puffs I ate earlier.

BURP!

Yeah, cheese puffs! Let's run the rules.

In this game you need to watch and memorise the sequence of lights

then tap out the sequence on the screen.

You need to get four sequences right by the end of 60 seconds.

But if you lose,

I'll upload your precious Earth twerp into my game...for ever.

So, who are you going to play for?

Asmaa's mum, Arthur's dad or Roman's mum or brother Lucas?

-Your...

-My brother.

-I think you should choose your brother.

My brother.

-So, why are you choosing him?

-Cos I just want to get rid of him, really.

You're a mean big brother. Do you want his bedroom or something?

OK, let's do this.

Take your place at the table.

Gamers, you have 60 seconds to win back Roman's brother.

Are you ready at home? The game begins in three, two, one, go!

Green, yellow, blue, red.

These guys really now their colours.

They got it right.

Green, orange, blue, blue, yellow.

I don't think they'll get this one though.

-40 seconds.

-Oh, they did.

Teamwork makes a dream work. And it makes me sick!

They're taking their time.

30 seconds.

I knew these bozos would get it wrong!

You know, I always knew they weren't the best gamers.

-You can tell by their shoes.

-20 seconds.

Guess they got it wrong!

Remember, they need to get two more correct sequences.

And you know, there's only ten seconds to go.

Will they get this one right?

They're running out of time.

-Five, four...

-They got another one but there's not long left now.

-Oh, yeah, they lost!

-Gamers, you have lost.

Oh, hey, don't feel bad, you did well.

You know, you remembered all four colours,

just not in the right order.

-Roman, at least you got rid of Lucas.

-Yes!

Oh, Roman, you're such a bad brother. I love it!

I told you this would happen. Your gameplay was lame.

You've lost.

Your brother is stuck in the game.

Commiserations, gamers.

Who was to blame?

Arthur.

-It was Roman's.

-Players undecided.

All is not lost.

You still have three of your friends and family to win back.

Please display a positive mental attitude.

-ALL:

-We can do this!

Pilot, let's fly to level four.

I know... oh!

Hey, I'm just catching some Ludus time here, folks.

What are you going to do now?

Here's a thought. Why not download my app?

Get over to the CBBC website.

Yeah, if you're not playing along yet, you still can.

Mmm, I'm not going to be rushing my caramel broccoli latte

for anybody, OK?

This is heaven. This so good.

Gamers, the next level is a single-player game.

Player has been selected.

Roman has a pet dog called Buddy.

This is irrelevant information and not needed for gameplay.

Hey, Roman.

Welcome to level four. Are you ready?

-Yeah.

-Let's run the rules.

To win this game, you need to collect 50 gold ticks

by dragging them into the target.

Avoid the red ticks - these subtract a point from your total.

Watch out!

Any tick can turn silver, hiding its original colour.

Your total will be revealed at the end of 60 seconds.

But if you lose,

your precious Earth twerp will be uploaded into my game...for ever.

So, who are you going to play for?

Asmaa's mum, Arthur's dad or your mum?

-My mum.

-Touching. OK, take your place at the table.

Gamer, you have 60 seconds to win back your mum.

Are you ready at home?

The game begins in three, two, one, go!

So, Roman is quickly dragging the gold ticks into the pocket,

but he has to be careful not to collect the red ones.

Look at him, he looks like an Earth squirrel foraging for nuts.

I'm sure there are quite a few red ones in there.

OK, so the total's 40 there. Yeah, keep those fingers moving, Roman.

And, uh, get the red ones in, OK?

The total's saying 54.

Remember, he needs to collect 50 gold ticks.

The counter is totting up all the ticks

but the red ones are subtracted at the end.

He needs at least 50 gold ticks.

He's doing well but I think he's dragged in quite a few red ticks.

He could still lose. It's all to play for. It's so exciting.

He's really very fast, isn't he? Has he done it?

It's a shame, you know,

this skill has no applicable use in the real world.

Three seconds left. So many ticks!

How many will be red? Let's find out. Has he done it?

The total is deducting. Keep going down!

Oh, no, he got 79!

-Gamer, you have won.

-In your face!

Oh, whatever, Roman.

Gamer, you can now collect your holobox and return to the Herculean.

-Who!

-Yeah!

-Yeah!

Congratulations, gamer. You have won.

Place your mum into the holoport and let's continue with your mission.

Pilot, let's fly to level five.

You still have two people left to save.

So far, I can confirm you have saved Arthur's brother Jacob,

Asmaa's friend Khadija and Roman's mum.

Unfortunately, Roman's brother Lucas wasn't so lucky

and is stuck on level three.

The next players have been selected. It's a two-player game.

We are now docking at level five.

Oh, look who it is.

Tweedledum and Tweedle-don't.

Let's run the rules.

In this game you must work as a team and use your bats

to stop your precious tick from hitting the spiky walls.

"Super easy!" I hear you cry.

Well, that's why my cat-walking bugs will be strutting around too.

You have 60 seconds.

If you hit the spikes more than five times you will lose

and your precious Earth twerp will be uploaded into my game...for ever.

So, who are you going to play for?

-Asmaa's mum or Arthur's dad?

-Asmaa's mum.

Oh, so you think you might lose?

You picked Asmaa's mum. Good tactic.

-Yeah.

-OK, take your place at the table.

Gamers, you have 60 seconds to win back Asmaa's mum.

And are you ready at home? The game begins in three, two, one, go.

Hmmm, these guys seem actually pretty good, don't they?

Oh, spike!

OK, bugs, great job there, blocking the tick. Really good.

Yes, a spike. That's two spikes.

They can afford four more hits. Oh, spike!

Come on, bugs. Let's see if we can stop them.

Spike! Four spikes.

Spike! That's five spikes.

If they hit it one more time it's game over for them.

I've got a good feeling. Yes! There it is!

Gamers, you have lost.

Oh, I get it now, that's why you were playing for Asmaa's mum.

Cos you knew you would lose. I told you this would happen.

Your gameplay was lame. You've lost.

Asmaa's mum is stuck in the game.

-We lost your mum.

-What?!

Asmaa, don't be too disheartened.

Your mission continues and you still have one family member to win back.

Yes!

Selecting player. Arthur selected.

Arthur loves to go to drama club but what drama awaits him on level six?

Hi, Arthur! I have a super-hard game for you. Let's run the rules.

In this game, you must push the tick and land it on the round target.

To steer the tick, use the paddles.

Push it too hard and you'll hit the laser beam.

But beware, my bugs will be getting in your way.

You need to land two ticks on the target in 60 seconds.

But if you lose,

your precious Earth twerp will be uploaded into my game...for ever.

So, there's only one Earth twerp left to play for - your dad.

-Do you think you can win him back?

-Of course I can.

Tell me, Arthur, how long have you known your dad?

-Ten years.

-Wow!

That's nearly as long as you've been alive! Take your place at the table.

Gamer, you have 60 seconds to win back your dad.

And are you ready at home? The game begins in three, two, one, go.

Arthur seems very confident here, doesn't he? I don't know why!

Laser beam! This game requires a lot of skill.

That's probably going to be Arthur's downfall. Bug! Love the bugs.

They're doing really well today, don't you think?

OK, Arthur, yeah, you will actually need to fire that tick.

This is basic stuff. That's way too hard!

OK, this one looks close.

Is that going to land? Keep going, keep going... Yes!

He still lacks the basic skill to get a tick on the target. Bug!

Bug!

The bugs are loving this. OK, that one looks good, doesn't it? No!

He still needs two ticks on the target to win

and he hasn't got one yet.

Can he do this? Too strong again.

He's still going for it but there's not much time left!

-He lost!

-Gamer, you have lost.

That's great! I told you this would happen. Your gameplay was lame.

You've lost. Your dad is stuck in the game.

Commiserations, Arthur.

You have lost. You have played six levels and won back three holoboxes.

Unfortunately, Roman's brother Lucas, Asmaa's mum

and Arthur's dad have been uploaded into Ludus's game for all time.

Now you must face Ludus one more time to win your return tickets home.

Pilot, fly at warp speed to the final level.

Hold tight.

We are now docking at the final level. Ludus is waiting for you.

Team status for final game.

Team spirit - 95%.

Fear of Ludus - 82%.

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, welcome to this,

the greatest show outside of Earth!

And here's how it's going to go down.

One of these ticks is your return ticket home. Who knew?!

All you have to do is keep an eye on it.

If you pick the right tick, you'll win a return ticket home

and go back to Earth.

Hooray!

But if you pick my bug, you will be stranded

here in the levels of Ludus for ever.

And you'll have to work for me, and trust me, you won't like it.

Got it?

Asmaa, take your place at the table.

See if you can catch your ticket.

It's time to mix the ticks.

Do you know which one it is?

This is fantastic! You lost.

Oh, you did that on purpose

so that we could stay together for ever, Asmaa, huh?

-Nice. How do you feel?

-Awful.

-Are you any good at cleaning?

-No.

You'll get better.

Arthur, let's see what you're made of.

It's time to mix the ticks.

Do you know which one it is?

You lost!

How wonderful! Roman, let's see if you can do better than your friend.

It's time to mix the ticks and play along at home.

Yes!

-Roman, you won. Was it a lucky guess?

-No.

Gamer, collect your return ticket home.

In your face, Ludus. I won.

Whatever, Roman.

You may have won a ticket home but in my eyes you'll always be...

a loser!

-Now scram!

-Bye.

Yeah, that's it, say your goodbyes and get out of here.

Winning gamers must board the Herculean immediately for departure.

-Yeah, get out of here!

-See ya.

Forgot about you already. Who was that guy?

Asmaa and Arthur, you've lost.

So, by the powers invested in me blah-di blah-di blah,

you must stay on the levels of Ludus for all eternity...

and mop.

-Any last words?

-Ludus, I don't want to clean the walkway for eternity.

Tough luck.

Roman, please present your ticket.

Congratulations. You are champion gamer.

You have rescued three of your friends and family.

The Herculean will now take you and your loved ones home.

Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! You know, that was funner than a box of bad apples.

And that was a great weekend, do you remember that one? Oh, wow.

Join me next time when I'll face three more puny gamers.

Until then, goodbye!

Tough luck, Ludus. I'm going home.

Ha-ha.