The Stuarts Marrying Mum and Dad


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The Stuarts

Children organise a wedding for their unmarried parents or step-parents. History-mad Oscar plans to transport his mums back over 400 years to the English Civil War.


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Up and down the country, parents are getting married in normal,

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traditional ceremonies.

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Normal weddings are quite...boring.

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But fear not, Britain, because we're fighting back.

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Open your eyes!

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Kids have set themselves the challenge of a lifetime...

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Quiet on set!

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To organise their parents' wedding.

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Bring it on!

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And to make it a day that no-one will ever forget.

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CHEERS

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Will they manage it?

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I'm quite nervous to plan it.

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Will Mum and Dad like it?

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It could all go completely wrong.

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And will they finally say, "I do"?

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We're going to rock this wedding!

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This is Marrying Mum And Dad.

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On today's show, we're travelling through time.

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Enjoy your uneventful journey.

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Quick! All the way back to the 1600s.

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Stand and deliver! Your money or your wife.

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But will this wedding go down in history...

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Or could it turn into a day to forget?

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They're going up a hill.

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Looks like Charles I has already lost his head.

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Welcome to Marrying Mum And Dad, the only show on television where you

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get to organise your parents' wedding.

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Amazing, right?

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Forget all the usual, traditional weddings, because this is going

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to be a day like no other.

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Let the chaos commence!

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Today, we're in West London...

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..with two wedding planners ready to devote their time to planning

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a day that will make history.

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Meet eight-year-old Oscar...

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I think that we could organise a really good wedding.

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It would be a really funny thing to do to them.

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And his cousin, Amelia, who's 12.

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I haven't ever organised anything as big as a wedding.

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I'm quite nervous to see what their reaction will be,

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but I'm quite excited.

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Oscar's younger sister, Isabella, is also part of the crew.

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But, being only six, she's just along for the ride.

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So, who's the, er, ahem, "lucky" couple letting these guys

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plan their big day?

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Meet Mum, Lisa...

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I think Oscar will have a few tricks up his sleeve,

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because he likes to shock.

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I think there'll be quite a few surprises along the way,

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so a little nervous about the whole thing.

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And Mum, Sylvia.

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I think Amelia's got a pretty good sense of humour as well,

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so we're expecting to laugh a lot but also to be quite humiliated.

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So, now we've met the family, what exactly have these two got in store?

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-BOTH:

-We're mad about history.

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Especially the gruesome bits - stuff like the Great Fire of London,

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the Plague and the English Civil War.

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That's why we're turning the clock back 400 years for this wedding.

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-BOTH:

-Because our theme is...

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The Stuarts.

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The Stuarts are one of the most famous families in British history.

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That's because they ruled England for over 100 years,

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between 1603 and 1714.

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Charles I is one of the most well known of all Stuart monarchs.

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Hello! I'm King!

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He led the Royalists, also known as the Cavaliers,

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during the English Civil War.

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Their enemies were the Parliamentarians, or Roundheads,

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commanded by Sir Thomas Fairfax.

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I'm not the king.

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Let's hope Oscar and Amelia can pull this off,

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otherwise this wedding could end up in some serious argy-bargy.

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GROWLING

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What a brilliant theme!

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I love history - 1066 and all that.

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Don't know much about the Stuarts, though.

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I wonder who's going to help me out with this one?

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Oh! Hello, Will, how are you?

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A lot better than most people during the summer of 1665,

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when the Great Plague was at its height, Ed, but thanks for asking.

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Eh?

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Yeah, by the time the epidemic had finished,

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a quarter of London's inhabitants had perished, you know.

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-Really?

-Yeah, really.

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I tell you, when it comes to centuries,

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the 17th is my absolute favourite.

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It is a real humdinger.

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Will, come with me.

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I've got a little job for you.

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You might know Will Best from shows like Airmageddon

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and Dance, Dance, Dance.

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The Airena is about to echo and reverberate

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to some serious aerial combat.

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But what you didn't know is that he's quite the history buff.

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Making him the perfect helper.

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Oscar and Amelia have already been hard at work,

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planning his mums' wedding.

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But now it's time for us to help them bring the 1600s to life.

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And that can only mean one thing...

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Behold! The trusty Marrying Mum And Dad mobile HQ.

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Officially, a parent-free zone.

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Here we go, guys.

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-The dream factory.

-Oh, my gosh!

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Step inside.

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Today, we're turning the plan van into a time machine,

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as Oscar and Amelia plot the mums' trip back through the ages.

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Why have you chosen The Stuarts as a theme for this wedding?

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Because I've been watching Horrible Histories since I was four,

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which was quite a long time ago.

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-Whoa, that's going to do weird things to your brain!

-Yeah, it is!

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And my mum has done a degree in history in university.

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-Oh, right! So is this a period in history she quite likes?

-Yeah.

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Why in particular do you think this is a good theme for the wedding?

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Because there was loads of stuff going on and at the start,

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-there's the Gunpowder Plot.

-Oh, of course, yeah.

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And then there's the Civil War, there's the Plague,

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there's the Great Fire of London.

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-Lots of death and destruction.

-Yeah.

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-What every woman wants on her wedding day.

-Yeah.

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So, now we know why they want this theme, it's time to get cracking.

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Starting with some natty 17th-century attire.

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How are you going to dress Mum and Sylvia?

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One's going to be like a Roundhead,

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-and one's going to be like a Cavalier.

-Oh, so...

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From the English Civil War, yeah.

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-Two men?

-Yeah.

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-Well, I hope they get on...

-Yeah.

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..because Roundheads and Cavaliers...

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-Don't get on.

-No.

-Not at all.

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We don't want a war.

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As the most important people at the wedding,

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our mums are going to be getting married as 17th-century VIPs...

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Charles I and Sir Thomas Fairfax.

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Sir Thomas Fairfax was quite important, because he was in charge

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of the Army, and Charles I was the main person who started the war.

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So, two powerful people together.

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I think it will be really good.

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But what about the other guests?

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Oscar and Amelia have decided they're going to be

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Roundheads and Cavaliers, too.

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So, Will has laid on a little fashion parade,

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to give our planners some much-needed inspiration...

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..English Civil War-stylee.

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Oscar, Amelia, meet my good friends from the mid-1600s.

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Good day to you.

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So, these are the sorts of clothes that you're thinking might be worn

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-at the wedding?

-Maybe.

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Have a feel.

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-It feels rough.

-Yeah, it's rough, that.

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They are probably the most comfortable clothes I own,

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but if we do a lot of movement, we get very hot very quickly.

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Soldiers like these would have fought against the King.

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I fight on Parliament's side.

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Ah, Roundheads.

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No, not Roundheads, sir.

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-Oh, sorry.

-They are Parliamentarians.

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Yeah, Will.

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But why were they called Roundheads?

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A lot of the initial Parliament soldiers had shaven heads,

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so it was actually a mockery against Parliament.

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Hairstyles aside,

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soldiers on both sides in the Civil War looked identical,

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leading to confusion on the battlefield.

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So, how did they see each other in different ways,

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like the Royalists and Parliamentarians?

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This is what's called an orange tawny sash, worn by Parliament.

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The Royalists would be wearing red ones.

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Do you think that these sorts of outfits are going to go down well?

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-AMELIA:

-Probably not.

-No?

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You don't reckon?

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Well, if they're, like, hot and sweaty, then I doubt it.

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Forget the guests. What about Lisa and Sylvia?

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If our planners get their way,

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they're not only going to be dressed as men...

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..but as arch enemies, too.

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Not exactly a recipe for wedded bliss!

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If I could choose something to wear on my wedding day,

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it would be something elegant, something comfortable,

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but probably not a period costume.

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I would hate the idea of being all trussed up and overdressed.

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That would be a bit of a nightmare.

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Uh-oh! Bad luck, ladies,

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because Oscar and Amelia are all kitted up and ready to rumble.

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That's a halberd and sergeants could be distinguished

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by carrying one of those.

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As a Sergeant,

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you have organised the costumes with military precision.

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-Yep.

-Nice one.

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Looks like that's the outfits taken care of.

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Next on the agenda, Oscar and Amelia need to find a suitably historic

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venue for their Stuart wedding.

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Time to take to ye olde World Wide Web.

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PHONE RINGS

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-ON PHONE:

-National Trust?

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We're calling from Marrying Mum And Dad and we were wondering

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if Ham House was free on the 29th?

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Er, I'm afraid it isn't.

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-Oh, OK. That's fine, then.

-Sorry.

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Hmm, it looks like authentic 17th-century wedding venues

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aren't that easy to lay your hands on.

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But hang on a second.

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There! There you go.

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Oscar and Amelia might just have hit Stuart era pay-dirt.

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PHONE RINGS

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'Good morning, Hinchingbrooke House, Craig speaking.'

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I'm from Marrying Mum And Dad.

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Please could we book this venue for the 29th?

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Yes, you can book for the 29th.

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-Do you want to view it first?

-Yes, please.

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-Would you like to come today?

-Yeah, we could come today.

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-Yeah, that would be great.

-Super.

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-Thank you.

-Yeah, thank you. that would be great.

-OK, thank you.

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-OK, bye.

-Thank you, bye!

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This Cambridgeshire school certainly looks the part.

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And Oscar and Amelia have found out some facts that make it

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even more perfect.

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Apparently, Oliver Cromwell's uncle lived here.

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Really? I wonder if he ever visited.

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Yeah, he visited a lot.

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It's suitably historic from the outside,

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but what about the inside?

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-Oh, this is amazing!

-You can't wait to have a look, can you?

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This looks nice.

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-Another big room.

-Yeah.

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I think this could be the ceremony room.

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It looks like it's from the right period, actually, doesn't it?

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Yeah, I reckon it is.

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I think your mums are going to be really happy with this, aren't they?

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-They are.

-I hope the Roundhead and Cavalier don't fall out,

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otherwise I might have to step in and keep the peace.

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No.

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-What, are you saying I'm not capable of providing the security?

-No.

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Yeah, you're probably right, actually.

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They're definitely right, Ed. You'd make an awful bouncer!

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With venue and outfits in the bag, our history-mad duo can turn

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their attention to the wedding-day transport.

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Any thoughts, Mums?

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I'd be happy to arrive jumping out of an aeroplane

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or something crazy like that.

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Really?

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Right, guys, you heard her. Do your worst!

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What's the transport going to be?

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Well, something that they used in the Stuart era.

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Very traditional.

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Mm. Like a wooden motorbike or a wooden car?

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-A wooden bus?

-No.

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A giant, wooden bird? They could fly in...

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Ed, your ideas are rubbish. Let's leave it to the pros.

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What were you thinking?

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A horse and carriage.

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Oh, is that it?

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A bit too traditional for my liking, but...

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-There's a twist.

-What do you mean?

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There's a highway robbery.

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Now you're talking!

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-Steal the rings.

-Oh!

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THEATRICAL PIANO

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Highway robbery was a common crime back in Stuart times.

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Many country roads were dangerous for travellers...

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..with bandits lying in wait in lonely areas of heathland or forest.

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The most notorious highwaymen became celebs...

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..and their executions would draw massive crowds.

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A bit like the 17th-century version of a Bieber gig, really.

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Back at the venue, Oscar and Amelia are putting the finishing touches

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to their plan for a wedding-day heist.

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The carriage will come out of here.

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Uh-huh, through the archway.

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The robber will be in the trees or behind the bushes.

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-Good place for a robbery.

-They'll jump out in front of the carriage,

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-which will probably stop here.

-Uh-huh.

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They'll say, "Give me all your rings."

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So, we've got the horse, we've got the carriage,

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and we've got ourselves a robbery. Transport sorted!

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That's one super-sneaky highway robbery,

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all plotted out and lying in wait.

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Next, an authentic Stuart-era wedding calls for some authentic

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Stuart-era entertainment.

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I wouldn't like the entertainment at the wedding to be us singing

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to the audience, cos that would be tragic.

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You said it, Mum.

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Was karaoke a thing back in the 1600s?

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What about shin kicking?

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What on Earth's that?

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Well, people put on metal boots and kick each other's shins.

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That's something they used to do in Stuart times,

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-kick each other's shins?

-Yeah.

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I don't know which is worse, sore ears or bruised shins.

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I would want to do something expressive, like expressing our love

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for each other through experimental dance, for instance.

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What about a pinching match?

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People pinching each other?

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Yeah, they pinched each other until somebody squealed

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and then the person who pinched them would be the winner.

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Doesn't say to me, "the most romantic day of your life".

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He's quite quirky, Oscar, a bit off the wall,

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so we're a bit nervous about what to expect.

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But remember, Oscar's not the only one planning this wedding.

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Cue Amelia.

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What about geese herding?

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What's that?

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Well, when farmers wanted to sell their geese, dogs would, like,

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keep them in order and, like, take them off to market.

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This is getting really weird.

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I think...I'm handing this over to Will. Will!

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Will?!

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Will?

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Ah, there he is.

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Come on, Mr I-Love-The-17th-Century, what have you got?

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He's got nothing less than a state-of-the-art, Stuart-era

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entertainment system, complete with...

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feathers?

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And a beak.

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HONK

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-Amelia, Oscar, this is David.

-Hello.

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Now, David is "the man" when it comes to the ancient,

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noble art of geese herding.

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I'll start,

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because, you might not know this about me,

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-but I'm kind of at one with geese.

-Great.

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I understand them, they understand me,

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so I can kind of show you guys how it's done.

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-DAVID:

-Sounds good to me.

-Yeah, OK.

-Brilliant.

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You might learn a thing or two as well, David.

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When it comes to geese herding, Will certainly talks the talk.

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But can he squawk the squawk?

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By using one of David's sheepdogs to guide the geese

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safely into their pen...

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Release the geese!

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Come to me. Come to me.

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That way.

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What is he doing?

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Guys, guys, guys, let's talk about this.

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Stop it, you're embarrassing me.

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He's terrible with geese.

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To be honest, David, I think the geese are broken.

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These geese have certainly got Will in a flap.

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Let's see if Oscar and Amelia can do any better.

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With a little help from expert herder David, of course.

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Away.

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Oh, look at them go!

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I found the geese herding really quite fun.

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HE SHOUTS

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Each dog has their own left and rights that you have to remember,

0:15:080:15:11

so it was really quite difficult.

0:15:110:15:13

Lassie, Lassie...

0:15:130:15:15

That's it.

0:15:160:15:17

Almost there.

0:15:170:15:19

They've really got the hang of this. Wow!

0:15:190:15:21

-DAVID:

-That's it. Now you can push the gate to, please.

0:15:210:15:24

Brilliant!

0:15:240:15:25

There we are. And they're all penned in.

0:15:250:15:28

Success! A whole flock taken safely to market.

0:15:280:15:32

But what have our two planners made of it?

0:15:320:15:34

Guys, I've got to say, I am very impressed.

0:15:340:15:37

Do you reckon your mums are going to be able to do it, though?

0:15:370:15:39

-No.

-Really?

-Yeah, I don't think they are.

-It might be tricky.

0:15:390:15:43

But will they enjoy trying? That's the important thing.

0:15:430:15:45

-I think they'll laugh.

-Yeah, I think they will.

-They'll enjoy it.

0:15:450:15:48

Otherwise the whole day's just going to be one big wild goose chase.

0:15:480:15:50

Yeah!

0:15:500:15:51

Stop with the puns.

0:15:510:15:53

Yeah, Will, stop winging it.

0:15:530:15:54

At least watching Lisa and Sylvia attempt to herd these geese

0:15:540:15:57

should make for some egg-citing entertainment.

0:15:570:16:01

Oscar and Amelia are making great progress.

0:16:030:16:06

But there is still one burning item on their agenda,

0:16:060:16:09

and that's the cake.

0:16:090:16:10

Looks like you've had a few ideas about the cake.

0:16:140:16:16

It's going to be, like, a Great Fire of London cake.

0:16:160:16:18

A Great Fire of London cake?

0:16:180:16:20

-There's going to be some houses stuck on it.

-Mm-hm.

0:16:200:16:23

We're going to try and set those houses on fire.

0:16:230:16:27

-What, actually set them on fire?

-No.

-Yeah.

0:16:270:16:29

So, we've got to make this cake in such a way that it doesn't

0:16:290:16:32

-burn the venue down.

-Yeah, sparklers.

0:16:320:16:34

It's going to be a flambe with a difference.

0:16:340:16:36

The guys' finished drawings will go off to a cake maker.

0:16:360:16:40

Wouldn't the fire brigade be a better bet?

0:16:400:16:41

SIREN

0:16:410:16:42

So, that's it.

0:16:440:16:45

The wedding day arrangements are complete.

0:16:450:16:47

From treacherous transport...

0:16:470:16:49

Your money or your life.

0:16:490:16:51

..to egg-cellent entertainment.

0:16:510:16:53

GEESE HONK

0:16:530:16:54

Guys, guys, let's talk about this.

0:16:540:16:56

This Stuart-themed wedding is set to

0:16:560:16:58

be Oscar and Amelia's crowning glory.

0:16:580:17:00

The wedding day's going to end up being really good and they're really

0:17:010:17:04

going to enjoy it, especially the geese herding.

0:17:040:17:07

I think it's going to be epic.

0:17:070:17:08

But, as the day draws closer,

0:17:090:17:11

our mums are getting more and more nervous about what lies in store.

0:17:110:17:15

It could be anything. We just don't know what to expect.

0:17:150:17:18

Yeah, I think the day's going to be quite an interesting one.

0:17:180:17:21

The wait is finally over.

0:17:250:17:27

We've rewound the clock 400 years and arrived smack bang at the start

0:17:270:17:32

of Mum and Mum's big day.

0:17:320:17:33

A few 17th-century flourishes are being added

0:17:350:17:38

to Oscar and Amelia's chosen venue.

0:17:380:17:39

What can you feel on yours?

0:17:410:17:43

I feel emotional.

0:17:430:17:44

While, at a secret location nearby,

0:17:440:17:47

mum Lisa and mum Sylvia are getting ready for a spot of time travel.

0:17:470:17:51

No Tardis required.

0:17:510:17:53

You often wear these types of things, do you?

0:17:530:17:55

One Royalist...

0:17:550:17:56

That's Charles I. Yee!

0:17:560:17:58

And one Parliamentarian...

0:17:580:18:00

Sir Thomas Fairfax. Ooh!

0:18:000:18:02

I'm not sure at all what he's got up his sleeve...

0:18:020:18:04

..as my beard pops off.

0:18:050:18:06

SHE GIGGLES

0:18:060:18:07

Back at the venue, a very special wedding guest is making some

0:18:100:18:13

last-minute preparations of his own.

0:18:130:18:15

Love is like a red, red rose.

0:18:160:18:20

It's prickly and gets up your nose.

0:18:200:18:22

No, that's not right.

0:18:220:18:23

Agh! I, William Shakespeare, intend to pen my finest sonnet

0:18:230:18:28

in honour of this special day.

0:18:280:18:30

And who, sir, are you?

0:18:320:18:34

I'm Samuel Pepys, celebrated diarist,

0:18:340:18:37

here to record, for posterity, the events of this most special of days.

0:18:370:18:41

You, sir, are not needed.

0:18:410:18:43

On the contrary, it is you who are not needed.

0:18:430:18:46

Well, we must settle this through the medium of verse.

0:18:460:18:50

Medium of verse?

0:18:500:18:51

Rap battle. Kick it.

0:18:510:18:53

HIP-HOP BEAT

0:18:530:18:55

# Yeah, my rhythm of choice is iambic pentameter

0:18:550:18:57

# It's perfect for rapping Yo, I am no amateur

0:18:570:19:00

# You and your diaries are both old hat

0:19:000:19:02

# 400 years on and my flows are still fat. #

0:19:020:19:04

You're up!

0:19:040:19:05

Saturday the 29th.

0:19:080:19:09

Met William Shakespeare.

0:19:090:19:11

Show off.

0:19:110:19:12

Oh, dear. That's not a good start!

0:19:130:19:15

It's almost time for mums Lisa and Sylvia to find out

0:19:170:19:20

what they're wearing.

0:19:200:19:22

Roundhead Oscar and Cavalier Amelia

0:19:220:19:24

already look every inch their 17th-century parts.

0:19:240:19:27

Shh! Here come the mums.

0:19:270:19:29

At least Shakespeare and Pepys seem to have kissed and made up.

0:19:290:19:32

Sort of!

0:19:350:19:36

OK. Right.

0:19:370:19:39

On the count of three, you can lower your hands.

0:19:390:19:42

Three, two, one.

0:19:420:19:44

Ta-da.

0:19:530:19:54

Oh, you look so lovely!

0:19:540:19:56

Do you like your clothes?

0:19:580:20:00

It's definitely my colour.

0:20:000:20:01

Do you think you've got the theme nailed, then?

0:20:010:20:03

I think so. I think it's Stuart, isn't it?

0:20:030:20:05

Very good. Very, very good.

0:20:050:20:07

Your mum's as good at history as you are.

0:20:070:20:09

-Well done.

-What do you think of Oscar and Amelia's outfits?

0:20:090:20:12

-Yeah, you look great.

-Amazing.

0:20:120:20:13

Everyone looks very dapper.

0:20:130:20:15

Mum and Mum successfully guessed the theme of their wedding and much

0:20:180:20:22

delight and merriment ensued.

0:20:220:20:24

Oh, P, P, P, P, P, P...

0:20:250:20:28

Watch and learn, my man!

0:20:280:20:30

Watch and learn. Kick it!

0:20:300:20:32

# The day's first surprise makes more sense in rhyme

0:20:320:20:34

# Like my homey Doctor Who

0:20:340:20:36

# We've travelled back through time

0:20:360:20:37

# In 1642, Mum and Mum had beef

0:20:370:20:39

# But today they're getting married

0:20:390:20:41

# That's a relief. #

0:20:410:20:43

Well, I think my account was rather better.

0:20:430:20:45

At the venue, all the wedding guests are awaiting their arrival.

0:20:480:20:52

All kitted out in full 17th-century costume.

0:20:520:20:55

-Let's hope they manage to avoid any highwaymen.

-Remember, the roads

0:20:560:21:00

weren't that safe for travellers back in the 1600s.

0:21:000:21:03

This is good! I thought it was going to be donkey back.

0:21:030:21:07

I wouldn't get too relaxed if I were you!

0:21:070:21:10

Enjoy your uneventful journey.

0:21:100:21:12

Quick!

0:21:120:21:13

Go, go, go!

0:21:220:21:23

HORSE NEIGHS

0:21:230:21:24

Stand and deliver! Your money or your wife.

0:21:240:21:27

Hand over your valuables.

0:21:270:21:29

All we have are these rings.

0:21:290:21:30

Ha-ha!

0:21:300:21:31

Hang on, they can't get married without those rings.

0:21:310:21:33

You'll have to duel the highwaymen if you want to get them back.

0:21:330:21:36

You're on.

0:21:360:21:37

En garde! En garde!

0:21:390:21:41

Oh, no! Oh, no!

0:21:420:21:44

I'm allergic to yeast.

0:21:450:21:47

Let's get out of here! Let's get out of here!

0:21:470:21:49

And you can keep your stupid rings.

0:21:500:21:52

Crumbs, that was scary.

0:21:530:21:55

I wish I'd had a bread knife.

0:21:560:21:57

Honour has been satisfied. We can continue our journey.

0:21:580:22:01

With the highwaymen vanquished,

0:22:040:22:06

Lisa and Sylvia have arrived at the venue.

0:22:060:22:09

Where they're about to be united

0:22:090:22:11

with their Roundhead and Cavalier guests.

0:22:110:22:13

CHEERS

0:22:130:22:14

Oh, nice moves, Sir Thomas!

0:22:180:22:20

Well, it's going swimmingly.

0:22:220:22:23

Who'd have thought that Roundheads and their Cavaliers

0:22:230:22:25

could get on so well? I guess that's why they call it a "civil" war.

0:22:250:22:28

Yeah, except don't speak too soon,

0:22:280:22:30

because it's now time for some authentic Stuart era entertainment -

0:22:300:22:33

and I've got a feeling that this one could ruffle a few feathers.

0:22:330:22:36

Your Stuart challenge is to heard a flock of geese from the countryside

0:22:380:22:44

to the city so they can be sold at market.

0:22:440:22:48

Now, on hand to assist you, should you, ahem, need it -

0:22:480:22:51

which I'm sure you won't -

0:22:510:22:52

is this humble yokel and his pack of faithful hounds.

0:22:520:22:57

Release the geese!

0:22:570:22:58

GEESE HONK

0:22:580:23:00

Surely this bunch of waddlers won't be any match

0:23:000:23:03

for a pair of 17th-century toffs?

0:23:030:23:05

In there, in there.

0:23:060:23:07

Or will they?

0:23:070:23:08

This way.

0:23:080:23:09

-OSCAR:

-They're doing quite bad, actually.

0:23:090:23:11

Come on, Thomas Fairfax!

0:23:110:23:12

You can lead an army, you can't lead a goose.

0:23:120:23:14

-OSCAR:

-They're going up a hill.

0:23:150:23:17

Looks like Charles I has already lost his head.

0:23:170:23:20

I think they're going to need some help from the expert after all.

0:23:200:23:23

The yokel's giving them a bit of a pep talk.

0:23:230:23:25

-Up to this point, he's clearly just been "yoking" around.

-Yeah.

0:23:250:23:28

Hang on, hang on, hang on... Look at this.

0:23:300:23:32

Come on! Come on!

0:23:320:23:33

Come! Lie!

0:23:330:23:34

Yes, they're starting to get to grips with it.

0:23:340:23:36

This is quite impressive now.

0:23:360:23:38

-Look, they're going through the gate.

-Yeah!

-Look!

0:23:380:23:40

CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

0:23:400:23:42

When it works, it really gives you goose bumps, you know?

0:23:430:23:46

Stop with the puns!

0:23:460:23:47

This is the moment of truth.

0:23:500:23:51

I feel like this is the most challenging bit.

0:23:510:23:53

Can Lisa and Sylvia finally get this honking, hissing bundle of trouble

0:23:530:23:57

back into their pen?

0:23:570:23:59

No. Oh, oh, oh. No, I missed it.

0:23:590:24:01

I missed the pen.

0:24:010:24:02

-DAVID:

-Down!

0:24:040:24:05

-Derecha!

-Oh, look, look, look!

0:24:050:24:07

They're getting into the pen.

0:24:070:24:09

They've cracked it.

0:24:140:24:15

All their geese herded safely to market.

0:24:150:24:18

That's a real feather in their caps.

0:24:180:24:20

You know what that means? They can get married now.

0:24:210:24:24

CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

0:24:240:24:25

Oh, Sammy, Sam, Samuel...

0:24:280:24:32

After the success we've witnessed, surely it deserves more than just

0:24:320:24:35

some scribbles in your tiresome diary?

0:24:350:24:38

Right! That's it! Drop it!

0:24:380:24:41

# Those geese were wild A gaggle that's criminal

0:24:410:24:43

# Mum and Mum tamed them in a style so traditional

0:24:430:24:45

# Though man's best friend has made a pile

0:24:450:24:47

# The time has come for them to walk down the aisle. #

0:24:470:24:50

Er...yeah.

0:24:500:24:51

Bring on the wedding!

0:24:510:24:53

The day so far has been all about the distant past...

0:24:550:24:58

..but now we're firmly back in the present,

0:24:580:25:00

just in time for Oscar's mums' I dos.

0:25:000:25:03

I give you this ring as a symbol of our love,

0:25:030:25:06

friendship and of the commitment we have made here today.

0:25:060:25:09

Through good times and bad, for the rest of our lives.

0:25:090:25:13

CELEBRANT: It now gives me great pleasure to congratulate you

0:25:130:25:16

on being partners for life.

0:25:160:25:19

Congratulations.

0:25:190:25:21

It's been an emotional occasion for Roundheads and Cavaliers alike.

0:25:280:25:32

I'm just relieved I didn't need to step in and keep the peace.

0:25:330:25:36

With Lisa and Sylvia officially wife and wife...

0:25:380:25:41

..it's time to serve up one final slice of the 17th century.

0:25:410:25:45

FANFARE

0:25:450:25:47

Presenting Oscar and Amelia's Great Fire of London-themed wedding cake!

0:25:490:25:54

Oscar, look at that!

0:26:000:26:02

Did you design that? Wow!

0:26:020:26:04

What an amazing cake.

0:26:050:26:07

Yeah, but it seems to have set alarm bells ringing with Samuel Pepys.

0:26:070:26:11

Oh, no, fire! Fire!

0:26:110:26:12

I must run home and bury my most expensive possession -

0:26:120:26:15

a Parmesan cheese - to protect it from the all-consuming flames.

0:26:150:26:19

Despite the Fire of London theme, this cake is a triumph

0:26:210:26:24

rather than a disaster.

0:26:240:26:25

To eat or not to eat, that is the question.

0:26:260:26:30

I'm going to eat it.

0:26:310:26:32

Thanks for that, Will. But I've got another pressing question...

0:26:340:26:38

Just what have the mums, Oscar and Amelia made of their day?

0:26:380:26:42

I think that this wedding was the best wedding I've ever been to

0:26:420:26:46

and it was so different. I think it's the best wedding.

0:26:460:26:49

-LISA:

-We're so proud of Oscar. He has an amazing imagination

0:26:500:26:53

and he's got a real knowledge of history.

0:26:530:26:55

I laughed a lot today and that's been a really good way

0:26:550:26:58

-to spend your wedding, I think.

-Yeah.

0:26:580:27:00

-We made a great wedding planning team.

-Yeah, we smashed it.

0:27:000:27:04

That was a Stuart-themed wedding that'll go down in history.

0:27:060:27:09

Oscar and Amelia's success, to me, was no mystery.

0:27:090:27:13

The day is nearly at an end, William. You may desist.

0:27:130:27:16

My words will live on long after I cease to exist.

0:27:160:27:20

Stop it.

0:27:200:27:21

Hop...it?

0:27:210:27:23

Cease!

0:27:230:27:24

Geese?

0:27:240:27:25

Enough!

0:27:250:27:26

Pepys stomped off in a huff.

0:27:290:27:30

History-mad Oscar plans to transport his mums back over 400 years to the English Civil War. With highway robberies, geese herding and a rap battle between guest star Will Best and Ed, this wedding attempts to rewrite history by marrying a Roundhead and Cavalier!