Episode 4 Sam & Mark's Big Friday Wind Up

'Say hello to the Wind-Up audience. Boy, do they love to rock!

'Hey! Why don't YOU join the party?

'Today's show is full of mayhem, magic and monkey business.

'Sound good? Then keep watching.

'Now, run those titles!'

# Wind me up, put me down Start me up and watch me go

# Cos it's easy once you know how it's done

# You can't stop now It's already begun. #

CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

'Ladies and gentlemen,

'Don't be shy, it's Friday night!

'Here are your hosts - Sam and Mark!'

CHEERS AND WHISTLES

Hey!

Come with me!

Oh, yes!

Aah!

Hey! Yeah!

-Welcome to the weekend!

-CHEERING

And welcome to Wind-Up.

It's going to be a belter of a show because this audience is on fire!

-CHEERING

-You know it.

It's not just the audience. We'll be turning up the heat for you at home.

Get this, on today's mighty Wind-Up

Loick Essien will be performing live here in this very studio.

Exciting.

Somebody will be winning me or Sam

in a game that involves a pair of shocking Y-fronts and this chimp.

ELECTRICITY BUZZES Ooo-aaa-ooo-aaa!

-Weird.

-Wow.

And we'll be clambering head-first into this crazy world.

You're playing a dangerous game, Merlin.

-Those goose bumps, eh?

-CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

-Wow!

-Could there be a better way to start your weekend? Don't think so.

First, it's time we met the Wind-Up audience.

They need to keep on their toes

because we've been doing our homework.

Oh, yeah.

Yes, we have, haven't we...

Kay?

-All right, lovely Kay? How you doing?

-Fine, thank you.

You look petrified.

Isn't it true that you lose your keys in some strange places?

-I do. I leave them all over the place.

-What's the strangest place?

-The fridge.

-What? Sorry?

-LAUGHTER

-The fridge?

-The fridge.

-Cool.

Sam, we've got a good'un over here. What about yourself?

OK. What have we got?

You all look terrified. "Don't pick me!"

Actually, I want to speak to you, Daniel.

-All right, mate?

-Yeah.

A little birdie tells me it's your birthday.

-Yeah.

-Happy birthday to Daniel.

-CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

And is it true that you're a big fan of

-# Jason Derulo? #

-Yeah.

My favourite thing about a birthday is that it's full of surprises.

Check this out.

Wassup, Daniel? It's me, Jason Derulo.

I hear that you're a massive fan and I'm very honoured.

I'm a massive of you, as well.

I send you the biggest happy birthday and many more.

-CHEERING

-Look at that! Wasn't it cool?

And, and...!

As if that wasn't enough, Derulo has signed for you a CD and a photo.

-Happy birthday, buddy.

-Thank you.

Pretty good. Pretty good.

Mark, beat that.

All right. I will.

You know how I'm going to do that?

-Georgia, you all right?

-Yeah.

LAUGHTER

You've got an embarrassing mum who likes a sing-song. Is that true?

-Yeah.

-What's this about your mum singing in a school video?

She sang to Amarillo. She was at the front and got the words wrong.

You are joking? That is so embarrassing. Where is your mum?

-She's at work.

-It's a shame she couldn't be here.

-It's a shame she couldn't be here?

-AUDIENCE: Yeah.

The thing is, your mum was so sad she couldn't be here

that she sent you a message to say sorry.

Hi, Georgia. It's your mum here. I wanted to say sorry...

-for what's about to happen!

-LAUGHTER

Cue the music.

MUSIC: Intro to "Is This The Way To Amarillo?"

-OUT OF TUNE

-# Is this the way to Amarillo?

# Every night I've been hugging my pillow

# Dreaming dreams of Amarillo

# And sweet Marie who waits for me

# Sha-la-la la-la la-la-la

# Sha-la-la la-la la-la-la

Oh! Oh!

# Sha-la-la la-la la-la-la

# And sweet Marie who waits for me. #

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

-Wow! Nice work!

-Maria, great moves.

Georgia, how do you feel? Proud or horribly embarrassed?

I don't know!

-Wow, Maria. That was horrible.

-LAUGHTER

We haven't finished with you because we are going to give your mum

the chance to redeem herself.

Go and get yourself ready.

Georgia, you need to come with me. Time to play Mum On A Wheel!

Georgia, are you ready to see your mum as you've never seen her before?

Yeah.

-LAUGHING:

-You look terrified.

Everybody in the Wind-Up audience, give it up for Mum On A Wheel!

CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

Wow!

-Mum, you are looking good. How are you feeling?

-I'm feeling good!

Looks amazing! OK, let me explain what on Earth is going on here.

We have a mum, safely - we hope - strapped to a wheel

with three gold sections. Sam.

If Mum lands on "Mum" she will win herself a prize. Nice!

Yeah!

If Mum lands on "Audience" she wins a prize

for our entire studio audience!

AUDIENCE: Woooo!

Thought you'd like that.

-If Mum lands on "Star", Georgia wins a prize.

-That's good.

-AUDIENCE: Wooo!

-Pipe down.

Only if she can answer a question correctly.

Basically, gold is good, yeah?

Red, however, is bad!

If Mum lands on red,

she will come face-to-face with a terrifying creature.

The Foaminator!

That's right! This week's Foaminator is Loick Essien!

Nice!

Come on over, Loick.

Loick, you are looking mean!

I like it. Stand right beside me.

If Mum lands on red, you need to release a furious amount of foam

right in Mum's mush, understood?

-OK. I promise.

-Awesome.

Georgia, we need to get out of here.

-We're out the line of fire. Are you ready, Georgia?

-Yeah.

Loads of prizes. No big deal.

-Come on, Sam!

-EVERYONE: Wind up that wheel!

MUM SCREAMS

-APPLAUSE

-It's landed on "Mum"!

You get a prize. Let's see what it is.

It's a proper Mum prize, a foot spa.

-Oooh!

-I like that.

-How you feeling, Mum?

-Good.

-Here comes the next spin.

AUDIENCE CHEERS

Oh, dear! You've landed on red.

You're about to get foamed by the Foaminator.

Standing position. After three. I'll stand behind here.

One, two, three!

CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

-Stop the foaming!

-LAUGHTER

CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

Mum, you still look beautiful.

# Is this the way to Amarillo? #

-LAUGHS

-One final spin. Here we go!

LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

Ah, no. You landed on "foam" again.

Would you believe it?

That means that the Foaminator is going to spray you in your mush.

Right in the face. Off you go!

CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

OK, Mum, are you all right?

-I'm a bit wet.

-LAUGHTER

-You won yourself a foot spa.

-Woo!

-But you did get foamed twice.

You've been a cracking sport. Give it up for Maria and our Foaminator!

That was amazing.

OK, we'll be seeing you and your family later,

because you'll be coming back to play Win The Presenter! Yeah!

Who will they be playing against?

It could be anyone in this audience tonight.

AUDIENCE: Wooo!

Take a look at what else is coming up.

You need to change your shirt, mate.

'We'll be dishing the dirt on pop sensation Loick Essien.

'But will it be the truth or a wind-up? Stay tuned to find out.

'The finger of fun is going to be conjuring up a magical surprise

'for a Merlin super-fan in today's Wind-Up audience.

'And there'll be mayhem and monkey business in Win The Presenter!

'But now, it's back to the boys in the studio!'

CHEERS AND WHISTLES

All that's still to come here on Wind-up.

Right now, give it up for Rupert, Angel and Eoin, the stars of Merlin!

CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

-How you doing, guys?

-Nice to see you.

Guys, welcome to the show. Thank you very much for being here.

We should take a look at a teaser of the new series, what you reckon?

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

- Don't leave me. - I have to, Father.

You're playing a dangerous game, Merlin.

Argh!

CHEERING

-Hello, intensity! Love that!

-LAUGHTER

Tell us. Is it going to kick off this series?

What lies beneath the skin of Merlin?

-It's going to be quite scary.

-It's terrifying.

-It looks scary.

-What's going to happen?

-Lots of evil things.

-Evil people.

-It's got much darker this year, hasn't it?

I was scared doing it. It's scary acting with Rupert, generally!

RUPERT: I find it hard as well.

Angel, what everyone wants to know is...

what's happening with Gwen and Prince Arthur? Kissy, kissy.

-At the end of the series. What's the dealio?

-There's been a few snogs.

Well, they do... They're in love.

They like each other a lot.

It's difficult because she's a servant, he's a prince.

The laws of Camelot don't allow them to be together.

So somehow, they'll have to find a way.

What about Lancelot? I sensed a bit of chemistry between you, too.

Him as well.

-Lancelot comes back and throws a spanner in the works.

-Really?

Interesting. What about you two lads? Surely some ladies for you?

Good looking lads! Let's face it, you ARE dream-boats!

We've got too much to do saving Camelot. We haven't got time.

-It's all about the work.

-Always.

There aren't many discos in Camelot.

Hopefully, one day.

I'd LOVE that. That'd be great.

It'd be cool, a night club. You guys would go.

We'd be there with bells on.

Angel, it's an amazing cast. There are a couple of legends.

Richard Wilson, Anthony Head. Is it quite nerve-racking?

It isn't, no, because they're lovely.

They never presume to tell you what to do or how you should be doing it.

They're there if you want advice. They're both really funny as well!

-Have you ever said, "I don't believe it"?

-No.

-To Richard Wilson.

You kind of don't really do that. No-one's ever done it.

We don't know what would happen. He's trying to let go of that role.

-Move on.

-Rupert does a good impression.

-That's an appalling lie!

-Everyone does but never to his face.

-After you. Yours was masterful.

-Cheers, mate.

-Do it again.

-I don't believe it!

Ask your dads, by the way.

Ask your dads. Now, this show is called Wind-Up.

-Who's the biggest prankster on the Merlin set?

-Everyone asks us that.

Colin did once play a prank on me.

Anyone who's seen Merlin now knows we have old Merlin.

Colin has to go through five hours' prosthetic make-up.

I had never seen him in this make-up before.

He had his make-up done, no wig and his normal clothes.

He slowly pushed the door of my dressing room open and went, "Boo!"

And I jumped out of my skin.

He said he felt really bad because I was genuinely terrified.

I didn't know who this thing was.

We need him on this! Good stuff.

-Sam before make-up, he says boo to me and I'm, "Get away!"

-True.

Well, guys, good luck with the new series.

-Give it up for the stars of Merlin.

-CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

KLAXON BLARES

Sorry, guys. We are gonna have to leave you.

That noise means one thing only.

It's time for the popular item known as Who Is In The Cake?

-Mark, please go and find somebody to play.

-OK.

We're on Cake Cam. Come with me.

Who have we got here? Who's up for a bit of cake-based fun?

Ooh, do-do-do-do.

Let's go for...YOU.

-Hello.

-Hello.

-What's your name?

-Bridget.

-Are you enjoying the show?

-It's fantastic.

-Are you up for a bit of cake-based action?

-Y-yeah. Why not?

Awesome. We've got our punter.

-Please bring on the Wind-Up cake!

-CHEERING

Yeah! Eh! Not just the Merlin guys that work out!

I pushed that in all by myself.

-Bridget, how you doing?

-I'm fine, thank you.

-Have you ever seen a cake like this?

-No.

-It's massive, isn't it?

-It's beautiful.

-Let me tell you how this works.

You're not going to believe this, but there is a famous character

hidden inside this very cake.

-Bridget, you've got 60 seconds to guess who that character is.

-Right.

Get it right, you win a prize. Simple.

You can ask as many questions as you want,

but we can only answer with yes or no.

-Got it?

-Right. OK.

-Got it?

-Yes.

-Got it.

-There you go.

Cos we're nice, here on Wind-Up, I'm going to give you a clue.

-That clue is, think movies.

-Movies.

I've already said too much. Can I have 60 seconds on the clock?

Your time starts now.

-Is it a male?

-Yes.

-Is it an action movie?

-Yes.

-Yes.

Oh, um. Are they over 40?

-Yes.

-Yes.

-Er...

-Looks good for his age, though.

-The bloke that was, um... Rocky, that bloke.

-No.

Seriously, Sylvester Stallone in the cake? No way!

-It's a character.

-It's a character!

Likes water. Ooh.

-Likes water?

-Spends a LOT of time at sea.

Lot of time at sea and it's a character and an action...?

Does a very good English accent.

I can't think! Um...

Ask us if the actor's first name is Johnny.

-Is his first name Johnny?

-Yes.

-Johnny...

-English.

-Nice guessing, but it's not Johnny English!

Cash. No. No.

-Say Depp.

-Sega. Johnny Sega?

Who? Johnny Sega!

-OK, time's up!

-Time's up.

-That went well(!)

Let's recap. It's an actor who spends a lot of time at sea.

First name, Johnny.

-The actor's name is Johnny.

-Right.

-Arrr!

-Johnny....?

-Oh, Johnny Depp!

-Oh! Johnny Depp!

-So, you're saying Johnny Depp, yeah?

-Johnny Depp's not in there.

Hey, we're about to find out, aren't we?

Let's see if you're right.

Cakey character, please reveal yourself!

CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

Yes, that's right. It's Jack Sparrow.

-You're happy about it, aren't you?

-I am.

-You look ecstatic.

Johnny Cash!

Ladies and gentlemen, please give it up for Bridget and Jack Sparrow!

-CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

-Oh, happy days!

Dancing chimps, rotating mums and cake-covered characters.

There's one place you get all that - our Big Friday Wind-Up.

-All right, Johnny?

-All good.

Run network.

'Here's a taste of some of the hidden camera pranks coming soon.'

All right! Woo!

What can I get ya?

Stop!

Oh, my goodness!

Ha-ha!

Cue BBC.

It's the telly for me!

-Good one, yeah?

-What a weirdo!

Still to come, a magical surprise for a mega Merlin fan.

We've got Win The Presenter.

One of this lot will be leaving with one of us. That'll be nice.

We've also got live music from Loick Essien.

And speaking of Loick Essien, he's about to take part in this.

It's the point where we put a celeb under the spotlight

and get YOU some answers.

-Give it up for Loick Essien.

-CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

As you can see, Loick is stood on the Truth Or Wind-Up podium.

We are going to ask him to confirm or deny five stories we've obtained

-by spending an hour trawling through the internet.

-OK, Loick.

It's time to sort out the fact from the fiction. Are you ready?

-I'm ready, guys.

-He is ready. Lights, are you ready?

I'll take that as a yes. Cameras, are you ready?

-They're ready.

-Everyone's ready. Fact one.

Let's go.

Loick Essien taught Janine from EastEnders her bad girl ways?

Audience, truth or wind-up?

ALL SHOUT AT ONCE

Ooh, a lot of "wind-ups".

A LOT of "wind-ups".

A few people saying "truth".

-All right, guys.

-All right.

-Thank you.

-All right.

I THINK they're going for "wind-up".

OK.

It's a wind-up, guys.

Where do you reckon that came from?

I think it came from growing up.

I was very close friends with Janine.

We used to be next-door neighbours and also went to stage school.

You didn't teach her her bad girl ways!

-Definitely didn't. I'm a good boy, a gentleman.

-Get off!

Hey, she's naughty on EastEnders. I've seen her. OK, FACT TWO!

Loick Essien once appeared in CBBC hit sitcom Kerching!

Audience, truth or wind-up?

ALL SHOUT AT ONCE

-That's sounding like a lot of "truths".

-A lot of "truths".

OK, audience. All right.

All right, we've heard you.

-We've heard you.

-< Truth!

-All right!

-Hey!

I think they're saying "truth". Loick, truth or wind-up?

-I'm surprised. It was the truth.

-Ooh! All right!

You know something? We know it's the truth cos we got proof!

So, where are your family, then?

-At the neighbours'?

-No, man. I told you.

-They leave me on my own, like yours do.

-Only while they're next door.

So you mean...

we're really home alone, then?

Er, yeah.

Bye. Got to go.

Nice. We saw you acting there. Have you done a lot of acting?

Um, yeah. I've been in, like...

I got the privilege to be in Holby City, Casualty, a few short movies.

-Then music took over.

-Do you think you'll do more acting?

Yeah. I want to make my presence first in music,

then go back to it, sooner or later.

All right! FACT THREE!

Getting a bit louder now.

Loick Essien has auditioned to be in three boy bands -

JLS, The Wanted and One Direction.

Truth or wind-up, audience?

ALL SHOUT AT ONCE

I think... All right! All right!

It's not a zoo!

I reckon it's probably 70-30 "wind-up".

What you saying to me?

Guys, it's actually a wind-up. CHEERING

Well done. Where has this terrible information come from?

-Well, I'm really good friends with JLS.

-Nice.

I'm close friends with Oritse.

And I also know The Wanted. I see the boys from time to time.

We're looked after by some of the same people behind the scenes.

Um...One Direction, I've seen them in the label a few times, in Sony.

-I've never actually spoken to them.

-That's where the rumour came from!

You know what I mean. That's a lovely story.

OK, FACT FOUR!

Loick Essien learnt all his moves in his mum's hairdresser's?

Audience, truth or wind-up?

ALL SHOUT AT ONCE

-I don't know, Sam. I just don't know.

-Mark.

Mark, that sounds like... All right. All right!

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That sounds like a lot of "truths". Loick, truth or wind-up?

Truth.

-CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

-Loick, tell us more. Tell us more.

My mum had a hair salon that she used to own in Fulham Broadway.

I always used to perform and I used to get on her clients' nerves.

I used to sing a song. Then I'd say, "I've got another one."

I could slowly see the smiles turn into frowns.

-That's probably where it came from.

-Right. Fact five.

Beyonce owes all her success to Loick Essien?

Hm, audience?

-ALL SHOUT AT ONCE

-Truth or wind-up?

I find this difficult to believe.

We're getting a lot of "wind-ups", Mark.

-They don't believe this fact!

-They don't believe it.

All right, guys. Thank you...

for your words.

-And noise.

-I think most of the audience are saying "wind-up".

What's the answer?

It's a wind-up, I'm sad to say. I would love to say it's the truth.

So where did this crazy claim come from?

Well, one of my managers is really close friends with her managers.

I guess how it came about is the guy who directed her Crazy In Love video

gave me my first shot to make my presence in music.

That's probably where it came from.

-You're saying that was a pretty tenuous link.

-Pretty tenuous.

LAUGHTER

Loick, loving your Truth Or Wind-Up skills there.

You rocked it. A big hand for Loick, everyone!

And we've got more from Loick later in the show, along with all this.

'Yep, Loick Essien is going to be performing live,

'right here in the Wind-Up studio and that's how we roll, people.

'Don't move a muscle because the Finger Of Fun is poised and ready

'with a magical surprise.

'And stay tuned to discover which presenter will be donning

'the world famous Underpants Of Chaos!'

-Sam, I love this show.

-It's good, isn't it?

-I've got one question.

-Shoot.

-Why is there a chimp limbering up?

-He'll be getting ready for Chimp On A Chair.

-Got you.

If you have just tuned in to Sam & Mark's Big Friday Wind-up,

you've only gone and missed Hollywood megastar Johnny Depp!

Looking good. Jack Sparrow, no big deal.

You missed that. And you missed this as well. Maria, Mum On A Wheel!

She got foamed twice and, check this out, she won a foot spa.

I'd love a foot spa. That foam, though, right in the face. Twice!

Don't worry, there is loads to come.

We are about to unleash a magical surprise

on someone in tonight's audience.

-To find that person, we need help.

-Please give a warm welcome

to the Finger Of Fun!

CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

FUNKY MUSIC PLAYS

Woo! Ah, yeah! Finger Of Fun, it's nice to see you.

Listen, we need you to find someone that loves having some fun.

Finger Of Fun, find us someone!

-Who could it be? Is it you? Is it me?

-Probably not.

Oh, it might be you.

It might be you, young lady.

Not you!

They all want to be on, don't they?

Ooh! Interesting!

Who could it be?

-All right!

-APPLAUSE

The finger has spoken. What is your name?

-Niamh.

-Well, Niamh, get yourself down here.

It's time for The Prize Surprise. Come on down!

-So, lovely Niamh, how are you getting on? Enjoying your day?

-Yeah.

-What's been your favourite part so far?

-The Merlin cast.

The Merlin cast!

-We've heard that you're a massive fan of Merlin.

-Yeah.

-It's worked out all right for you!

-That was handy!

To be honest, we know quite a lot about your love for Merlin.

You have written a Merlin-based story called Alice's Spell.

And we know that you and your friend Emily have Merlin sleepovers.

What happens there?

I downloaded the Merlin theme tune and we just chat about Merlin

and watch it over and over again.

-A cracking night!

-Can we come next time?

-Yeah.

We also know that you are an extra big fan of Merlin himself.

We've got a photo to prove it. Look at this!

There's you with a waxwork of Merlin. That's your sister?

-Yeah.

-And there's you kissing the waxwork. Kissy, kissy!

A waxwork! He's got lovely skin.

Niamh, let me ask you, seeing as you are such a massive fan,

would you like to see a Merlin clip that has been recorded just for you?

Yeah.

-Thought you might say yes.

-Watch this very carefully.

The clip features some things you might recognise -

-some of your favourite possessions.

-OK, Niamh, eyes peeled.

Check this out.

Almayu.

Well, Niamh, hope you won't be needing these for a while!

What is all this stuff? "Niamh".

Frio!

That's better.

CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

Wow!

Pretty incredible stuff there, Niamh.

Now, I hope you were paying attention.

You've now got 20 seconds to recall as many of your items

from that clip as possible.

-For every item that you remember, you will win a prize.

-OK.

-You've got 20 seconds. Your time starts now.

-My Year Six yearbook.

Paddles, my teddy bear.

My, er, money box.

My scarf. Um...

My necklace. A picture of me.

-You've got three left.

-AUDIENCE SHOUTS OUT

KLAXON

Niamh, you did really well.

I can confirm that you recalled six of your items.

You win six prizes from the Wind-Up prize stash!

You did really well. Nice one.

-The items that you didn't get was the diary...

-Oh, yeah.

-Your orange hoodie.

-Yeah.

-Your snow dome. She gave it a shake.

-Oh, yeah!

-What do you think of that clip?

-Awesome.

Listen, Niamh, and listen real good.

Now is your chance to get your hands on this!

To get your hands on that HD TV,

-with Freeview built in...

-Built in?

-Yeah!

-..just answer one Merlin question. Are you up for the challenge?

-Yeah.

Excellent. Cue the magical mystical tension music.

-SPOOKY MUSIC

-Here comes the question.

The clip you just saw featured Morgana, but...

what is the name of Morgana's evil sister?

-Morgause.

-Morgause.

-Ah!

You don't want to think? You went in straight there.

-You've got to have a think about it.

-Morgause?

-Yes.

-I hope it's right.

-I can confirm that that is...

-Oh, no.

-Right!

-CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

Which means you have won today's star prize, a HD TV

with Freeview - it's built into it!

-Shut up, Sam.

-It's amazing!

On top of that, you know that picture of you and Merlin?

We only went and got Merlin himself to sign it for you!

That's great, isn't it?

-Give her it. Let her have it!

-APPLAUSE

All right, Niamh?

-When you woke up, did you think your day would end like this?

-No.

-Brilliant.

-I'm sure you'll agree she's been an incredible sport.

-Give it up for Niamh!

-CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

And Niamh, I don't want to excite you even more, but I will.

You and your family are about to take part

in another magical experience right now.

It's time for Win The Presenter!

Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? Million Pound Drop, Deal Or No Deal.

Let me ask you this, are they REALLY successful shows?

Yeah.

When you give away a presenter as a prize, it's gonna cause a stir.

It's never been done before, has it? Winning the presenter! It's insane.

When we thought about it, we realised that encouraging families

to do whatever they wanted with us wasn't our best idea.

So I told the BBC bosses, "No. I'm not doing it."

-But it was too late. They'd already made the graphics.

-It was too late.

We're done, yeah?

Well done(!) Worst idea you've ever had.

'Welcome to Win The Presenter!

'Let's find out which presenter they're playing for today.

'He's mean. He's lean.

'He's a presenting machine.

'Mr Mark Thomas Rhodes.

'It's time to meet your host.

'It's Sam Nixon.'

CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

Thank you. Welcome to Win The Presenter,

where two families go head-to-head to win Mr Mark Rhodes.

If you're wondering why Mark's face looks like that it's because

the winner can do anything they want with him.

-How does that make you feel, Mark?

-Not great.

Let's meet the families who could be getting their hands

on five foot eight of pure goon.

Nine. Five foot nine.

-LAUGHING:

-I said in rehearsals he'd say five foot nine.

Maria, we saw you earlier, embarrassing your daughter, Georgia.

-Did you enjoy it?

-It was brilliant, thanks.

Georgia, introduce the team.

This is my brother, Max, and my dad, Adam.

-Give it up for the Bramhalls!

-CHEERING

The Bramhalls, to get your hands on Mark,

you have to beat the Paynes.

-Niamh, introduce the team for us.

-This is my mum, Annie.

This is my sister, Fionnula, and that's my dad, Mark.

Nice shirt, Mark. Like a barbecue shirt!

I'm having that after the show!

-Give it up for the Paynes!

-CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

For inspiration about what to do with this very special prize,

look at what our last family got up to when they won the presenter.

Five foot nine!

-Hi, Sam.

-I am all yours.

-What have you got for me?

-We're having a girlie night in.

-The girls want you to pamper them.

-Pamper them. All right.

KNUCKLES CRUNCH

Tickles!

-Looks nice on you.

-Don't expect a tip.

-Right.

-Cup of tea now, Sam.

-Bye, guys.

-ALL: Bye!

Hope that's given you inspiration of what you could do if you win Mark.

Back to me in the studio. Can't believe I've got this on!

The Bramhalls, any unpleasant jobs for Mark to do around the house?

-Cleaning Max's football boots.

-Ooh, nice.

-Doing the gardening. Scrubbing the toilet.

-Ooh, yeah.

-He loves doing that, don't you?

-No, I don't.

The Paynes, what about you?

Well, my mum thought that he could be the waiter.

-Brilliant. Mark, you'd be up for that, wouldn't you?

-Cosmic(!)

It is the best of three rounds. Let's kick off with round one.

Mark, go and get yourself ready.

It's time for Presenter Under Pressure.

Normally, Mark Rhodes in a pair of underpants

wouldn't be suitable family viewing.

Luckily, he's fully clothed

and these aren't any old pants, they are the Underpants Of Chaos!

I will be asking Mark questions about something

he should know a lot about - me!

Every time he answers a question incorrectly

or takes too long, I will send a shot through those pants.

-Let me see if they are working.

-BEEP

ELECTRICITY BUZZES

They're working. Camera five,

check to see if they're working. Press that red button.

-ELECTRICITY BUZZES

-Argh!

-Ha ha!

I think they're working.

Families, all you have to do is guess how many questions out of ten

Mark will correctly answer.

Remember, he is under extreme pressure because those pants

sure pack a punch.

Families, you have ten seconds to write down your answer.

Mark, we've known each other for eight years.

-Who are you again?

-Ten out of ten, mate, you should get for this.

-Families, time is up. You've done that?

-Yeah.

-Beautiful.

In that case, Mark, let's put you really on edge by throwing in

scary music and dramatic lighting.

SCARY MUSIC

OK, underpants at the ready, Mark.

Your ten questions start now.

What star sign am I?

-Leo.

-Incorrect.

ELECTRICITY BUZZES

Aries, mate. Ram. Ram!

Question two. I have a tattoo "B" on my forearm. What does it stand for?

-Barnsley.

-Correct. Can you name five other famous Sams?

You're joking!

Samantha Janus?

Time's up.

Sorry, mate. Question four.

If I could present with anyone else, who would it be?

-Jamie Oliver?

-Incorrect.

-Waaa!

Granted, I do like Jamie Oliver.

But it would be Nicole Scherzinger. She's lovely.

Question five. I was a karate champion. Which category was I in?

-Under four foot four, national.

-Correct.

Yeah, I was. I was a pint-sized assassin.

Question six. How tall am I?

-Five foot eight.

-Correct.

Question seven. On 7th August 2011,

I was sat in a cafe and had a stretch and a yawn.

-What happened next?

-You fell off your chair.

-Correct!

Question eight. How old is my dog?

Elliott, she's...five?

-Incorrect.

-Argh!

-ELECTRICITY BUZZES

She's four. Dog years, 28.

-Oh, come on!

-Question nine. Name another five famous Sams.

Come on! Sam...

-Time's up!

-Argh!

OK, your final question.

Take my age, multiply it by two and take away my shoe size.

What number do you get?

Er... 48...

38?

-Time's up. Incorrect.

-Aargh!

-It was actually 42.

That is your ten questions. Give him a round of applause.

Mark, I can confirm that you got four right.

The big question is, how did our families do? The Bramhalls.

What did you say?

-Five.

-It's close! The Paynes, what about you?

Seven.

The Bramhalls are closest. You get the point. Congratulations.

It's now time for round two. Bramhalls, do you like monkeys?

Yeah.

-Paynes, do you like furniture?

-Yes.

I've got some exciting news for you. It's time for Chimp In A Chair.

Please welcome Mark's pet chimp who, you will have noticed,

is spinning ten to t'dozen.

Once it stops spinning, our dizzy chimp has 20 seconds to grab as many

of these hats as possible.

Don't know why there's hats. Let's roll with it.

The big question is, how many will he be able to grab?

Families, you have five seconds to write down your answers.

It will be quite difficult because he's been spinning for a long time.

-BELL RINGS

-OK! Stop the chimp!

Come on, chimpy. Get out. Find the hats!

That way! That way! Get up, chimp!

AUDIENCE CHANTS: Chimpy! Chimpy!

Don't fall on the wizard hat! That'd hurt.

Pass them to me, if it helps.

Oh, dear. Oh, dear.

Oh, wow.

Wow! Come on, chimp!

-KLAXON

-Time's up. Mark, help your chimp.

Round of applause for the chimp.

Oh! This is classy television, right here!

Let's count the hats.

One, two, three,

four, five, six,

seven, eight.

Eight hats!

Let's go over to our families. The Bramhalls, what was your guess?

-It was...six.

-Ooh.

Interesting. The Paynes, what about you?

-Ten.

-Ten! Interesting!

You are both two off so we're going to give you both a point.

CHEERING

At the end of Chimp On A Chair, the scores are two to the Bramhalls,

one to the Payne family.

It's time for the third and final round - Celebrity Friends.

OK, OK, it's getting pretty tense. It's getting pretty tense.

The Payne family, you need to win this to stay in the game.

Recently, we caught up with pop princesses the Sugababes.

We asked the Sugababes to sum Mark up in three words.

What three words did they use?

Were they A - "chiselled, smooth, loving"?

B - "hunky, funky but looks like a monkey"?

Or C - "funny, boisterous and handsome"?

Please write down your answers.

Was that A - "chiselled, smooth, loving"?

B - "hunky, funky but looks like a monkey"?

Or C - "funny, boisterous, handsome"?

The Bramhalls, what's your guess?

-We done...C.

-C - "funny, boisterous, handsome".

-The Payne family?

-We did C.

-You've also gone C.

"Funny, boisterous and handsome." Mark, what would you have gone?

What was the first one? I liked that.

-"Chiselled, smooth and loving."

-Thank you. I'll go with that.

-LAUGHTER

-OK, well...

Let's see what the Sugababes said.

-If we described Mark in three words, it would be...

-Funny.

Boisterous. And handsome.

-CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

-Which is answer C.

Which means you both get the point.

That also means that the Bramhalls are today's winners.

Congratulations, guys. Let's go over here.

Commiserations to the Paynes. Have you enjoyed yourselves?

-A lovely time, thank you.

-Give it up for the Paynes!

-CHEERING

-The Bramhalls, congratulations.

-Will you get him cleaning your football boots straight away?

-Yeah!

Awesome. Guys, take your positions. Give them a round of applause.

That is the end of the show.

A big thank you to all the stars.

Angel, Rupert and Eoin from Merlin! Jack Sparrow!

Guys, do with Mark what you wish.

Just make sure he's back for the next show. Bye!

APPLAUSE

Now, let's end this show with a bang.

This is Loick Essien with his brand new single Me Without You.

# I put on my jeans and shirt and shoes the same

# And I leave my house and show my face again

# I thought that I could find a way to hide the truth

# But everybody knows

# Everybody knows

# I'm tryin' to smile

# I'm tryin' to laugh

# I'm tryin' to live another life

# Tryin' to be the me without you

# It's like driving in a car with no wheels

# Flying through the sky with no wings

# A needle in the eye

That don't sting

# When you're under water

You can't breathe

# When I need to call you I can't reach

# Tryin' to light a fire with no spark

# No match

# And no fuse

# Tryin' to be the me without you

# Oh, it's hard to find somebody new

# The only one I'm looking for is you

# I thought that I could find a way

# To hide the truth

# But everybody knows

# Everybody knows

# I'm tryin' to smile

# I'm tryin' to laugh

# I'm tryin' to live

# Another life

# Tryin' to be the me without you

# It's like driving in a car with no wheels

# Flying through the sky with no wings

# A needle in the eye that don't sting, yeah

# When you're under water you can't breathe

# Baby, I'm tryin' to fly

# When I need to call you I can't reach

# Tryin' to light a fire with no spark

# No match

# No fuse

# Tryin' to be the me without you

I'm tryin' to win

# I'm tryin' to fight

# I'm tryin' to make it through the night

# I'm tryin' to run

# Tryin' to sleep

# I'm tryin' to feel

# I'm tryin' to keep on

# Tryin' to be the me without you

# It's like driving in a car with no wheels

# Flying through the sky with no wings

# A needle in the eye that don't sting

# When you're under water you can't breathe

# When I need to call you I can't reach

# Tryin' to light a fire with no spark

# No match

# And no fuse

# Tryin' to be the me without you

# Yeah. #

CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

'Coming soon to Wind-Up.

'We carry out the biggest CBBC prank ever.'

RETCHES

-Where is he?

-Being sick.

RETCHES

There's no way Ian's going to make it back.

-Are you all right to do this?

-Is this genuine?

# CBBC! #

CBBC is the telly for me.

It makes me want to go he-he.

EXPLOSION Later on this afternoon...

What has he done?

It's wrecked the Blue Peter greenhouse.

'Tune in next time for all that and so much more. Bye for now!'