Episode 3 Sam & Mark's Big Friday Wind Up

Say hello to the Wind-Up audience!

Nice moves!

They're warming up for the party, and what a party it's going to be!

Cos this show is packed full of pranks, surprises,

celebs and all round good times!

Now, run those titles!

# Wind me up Put me down

# Start me off and watch me go

# Because it's easy Once you know how it's done

# You can't stop now It's already begun. #

APPLAUSE

Ladies and gentlemen!

If knowing them is wrong, I don't want to be right!

Give it up for Sam and Mark!

CHEERING

-How you doing, guys? High five! High five! High five!

-Oh!

-Oh!

Come on, you!

-Welcome to the weekend!

-Yeah!

CHEERING

Hold on tight, folks,

because we're heading straight into the danger zone!

Yes, we've pushed this show to the limit,

and quite frankly, it could blow at any time!

On today's ma-hoosive big Friday Wind-up,

it's a lucky day for everyone,

because Nicola Roberts will be performing

live in front of your very eyeballs!

CHEERING

Oh yes. Joe Swash will be burning rubber in a race off face-off.

-He's very good!

-He is very good. Well, I say that.

He's not that good!

And we'll be turning someone here into a genuine A-list celebrity.

AUDIENCE: Ooooh!

This is the show with a surprise around every corner,

-so no-one is safe!

-Go and get 'em, Sam!

Yes, no-one is safe in our studio audience.

Nobody at all. Nobody's safe!

I can see you all, you're all scared. Nobody is safe. Especially...

You!

Hello. How are you doing? Are you Mum? Are you Amber's mum?

Can I sit on your knee? Cheers, love.

That's a comfy seat, right there. How are you doing? You all right?

-Yeah.

-Good.

Now, what's this we hear about your nan?

Because we hear that she likes to do an impression of this lady.

That right there is rock goddess Tina Turner.

-Yeah!

-Tell us more!

Um...

What are you laughing at?

So does she do this a lot?

Um, well, we've got this wee game...

You sing.

-Oh yeah, you get up and start singing?

-Yeah.

That must be embarrassing.

Is it embarrassing?

Kind of!

And where is your nan today?

Um...she's in...

She's gone with Grandma Sue, hasn't she?

She's gone with Grandma Sue, has she?

-Gone away for the weekend.

-Gone away for the weekend?

Awww!

Well, that's funny, because if your nan has gone away with Grandma Sue,

then who's this?

APPLAUSE

# You're simply the best

# Better than all the rest

# Better than anyone

# Anyone I ever met

# You're simply the best! #

APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

That was amazing! I love the wig, I love the dress, brilliant!

Amber, how does that make you feel?

LAUGHTER

-She's lost for words!

-Lost for words!

Normally, Amber, because that was so embarrassing,

we'd be letting you get your revenge by strapping your nan to

a massive wheel and spinning her ten t'dozen.

But something about that doesn't sound right. Right, Mark?

Yeah, I don't think we should do that.

Audience, what do you think? Can we put Amber's nan on the wheel

and give her a spin?

CHEERING

Don't say yes! We can't do that, so, what we need,

we need someone to step in and take her position.

Someone who's brave, someone who's fearless.

Someone who has no idea what they're in for.

Ladies and gentlemen,

it's time to play... Joe on a wheel!

Amber, are you ready to see Joe Swash as you've never seen him before?

Awesome. Studio audience, are you ready to see Joe Swash

as you've never seen him before?

CHEERING

In that case, everyone in the Wind-Up audience,

please give it up for Joe on a Wheel!

CHEERING

Who could have done this?

Joe, welcome to Wind-Up!

It's Joe Swash, everybody!

CHEERING

Are you enjoying your experience of being on our show?

-I was never told about this bit.

-Oh, really? Oh, no!

It must have been a misunderstanding! Sorry about that.

As you can see, we have Joe Swash on a wheel.

If Joe lands on Joe, he will win himself a mystery prize.

That'd be nice, wouldn't it, Joe?

I take it home or have I got to give it away?

-You take it home!

-I get to keep it?

Of course you do! Good luck.

Good luck.

If Joe lands on audience, he will win a prize for our studio audience!

CHEERING

And if Joe lands on star, Amber here wins a prize.

Yeah, yeah!

Wait one second, only if she can answer a question correctly.

Amber, who are these mascots you've got?

Woofy and Millie.

Woofy and Millie are going to help us with the questions.

But to summarise, gold is good, yeah?

Red, however...is BAD!

That's right. If Joe lands on red,

he will be coming face to face with...the Foaminator!

CHEERING

This week's Foaminator is Chimpy! Come on over, Chimpy!

Yep, it's the resident chimp. Chimp meet Joe, Joe, meet Chimp.

-I've had words with Chimp already!

-You've been chatting? That's nice.

You know the score. If Joe lands on red, you need to release

a furious amount of foam right into Joe's kisser.

Understood? No monkey business? No monkey business, excellent.

-Amber, are you ready?

-Yeah.

Fantastic. Here we go. Loads of prizes, no big deal. Come on, Sam!

AUDIENCE: Wind up that wheel!

CHEERING

Sorry, Joe! What a shame!

Your first appearance on Wind-Up and you land on foam!

It'll be my last appearance as well!

In that case, Foaminator, you get yourself in position.

I'm going to stand behind here.

Not that close! Get back a little bit!

That's the designated safe area, Joe!

OK, after three!

One, two, three!

CHEERING

-You all right, Joe?

-Wipe my glasses!

-I'll wipe your glasses.

-Take the white bits off my lips,

-it tastes horrible!

-Aww!

Are you OK to carry on?

I've got no choice!

That you haven't! Here we go with a second spin!

CHEERING

LAUGHTER AND CHEERING

It's not rigged, Joe, I promise!

OK, so!

On the second spin, it means you're going to get another foaming!

OK, after three!

One, two, three!

CHEERING

-All right.

-Sorry, Joe!

Joe, we got one last spin, let's try and get a prize, yeah?

-Come on, Joe! Play the game!

-It's like you want to be foamed!

Here we go!

CHEERING

What is it? NO!

I can't believe it!

It's a Wind-Up first, three foams in a row! Joe, you know what this means.

I'm really cold!

We'll get you warmed in a bit.

OK, Foaminator, for the third and final time, one, two, three!

CHEERING

OK.

I'm freezing!

Now, Joe, we don't usually do this.

We're not doing it again!

Because you've had three in a row, we're going to give you a bonus spin.

That's fair, audience?

-Yeah.

-AUDIENCE: Yeah!

-Here we go!

-Come on, mate.

It's when you spin it, it gets cold!

It's landed on Joe!

-Which means you get a mystery prize.

-Fantastic!

And that prize is...

It's another foaming by the Foaminator.

One, two, three!

Ohhh! Joe, what a prize.

-You must be happy with that prize.

-I'm freezing!

Ah! OK.

That means at the end of Joe On A Wheel you got foamed three times,

-but you did win that last prize.

-What prize?!

That was a prize, Joe. You should be happy about that!

Please, ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Joe and our Foaminator!

Oh, wow. Well, Joe, we'll see you later

when we play Truth Or Wind-Up with you and Nicola Roberts.

Joe will also be helping us out later. Amber,

you are going to be coming back later on,

and you could win me or Sam. How does that make you feel?

SHE GIGGLES

-She is speechless.

-Speechless!

-Massively speechless.

-Just went "Argh!"

-But who will Amber be playing against?

It could be anyone in this audience here tonight.

AUDIENCE: Whoo!

Keep watching to find out who. Here's what else is coming up.

Nicola Roberts will be performing live later in the show.

And we'll be catching up with her very shortly!

One family in the Wind-Up audience will be getting

the surprise of their lives when they discover they're related

to the most famous face in the world!

And you've just seen him get a face full of foam.

But will Joe Swash have better luck

when he goes head-to-head with Sam on the Wind-Up race course?

Three, two, one.

MUSIC: "Party Rock Anthem" by LMFAO

Right now, here's a taste of the hidden camera nonsense

we like to get up to on Wind-Up.

You told me to pull it hard!

All right! Whoo!

-Stop!

-Stop!

Oh my goodness.

-Barnsley!

-Barnsley!

-Yorkshire!

-Yorkshire!

I'm from Italy.

-That's enough.

-Okeley-dokeley.

I knew it!

I knew it, I knew it!

Brilliant.

I found that very, very disturbing.

We like to spoil you with top celebrities here on Wind-Up

and today is no exception.

This girl's ALLOWED on the show any time she likes!

She's part of the world record-breaking pop group

Girls Aloud!

She's had 20 top ten hits!

Four number one singles!

And won a BRIT award!

And now, she's gone solo,

and she's right here in the Wind-Up studio.

Oh yes, give a big Wind-Up welcome to Nicola Roberts!

APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

Come on over. Looking gorgeous, Nicola.

-You all right?

-Good, thank you.

I'm waiting for my cuddle! How you doing, darling?

-You all right?

-Yeah, good, thanks.

Nice to see you. Thanks for coming. Are you well?

I'm very well indeed, you?

-Yeah, good.

-Not seen you for ages.

Let's talk about the new album, Cinderella Eyes.

How would you describe it?

I would describe it as pop-electro music.

-A bit like the Pet Shop Boys? Ask your dads!

-Not quite!

Not quite.

It's quite like, a little bit for everybody.

A bit of a predictable question,

but it's not going to stop me from asking it!

What's it like making an album by yourself?

It's very different.

-I'll bet.

-I'm fine now.

The first couple of things I did,

-I was like, "Did I think this through?"

-Oh, bless you.

No, I'm having the best time.

I bet it was a bit scary at the time, at the beginning.

Making the album, I was absolutely in my element.

I had the most amazing, amazing time.

Every day, I kind of wake up and miss making the record.

At the beginning of promotion, when I was on my own,

-that was when it hit me.

-I bet it was, yeah.

It was like, I think the first thing I ever did was a gig,

and it was in front of 10,000 people.

-Wow!

-And let me tell you, I felt like a little fish on a big stage!

-I was like, "Oh!"

-Where are the other girls?!

Where have they gone?

That was strange, but I'm all right now.

I've got to say, I love the single, Lucky Day.

-Fantastic.

-Thank you.

And you're performing that later on?

-Yes.

-Looking forward to that.

Is that about appearing on Wind-Up, Lucky Day?

It could have been!

Let's just say it was.

I don't think it was.

Nicola, it's been lovely talking to you.

-Thank you.

-It's about time we moved on to the hard-hitting questions.

We're going to need a bit of help from this lot. See you later!

All right.

OK.

The first question is from Emily.

Where's Emily? There she is!

I'll come and grab you, Emily. I'm coming for you.

Here we go. Emily, stand up.

You all right? Aw! What's your question for Nicola?

-What's your favourite cheese?

-Whoa!

Now, this is an important question which needs to be answered.

It's like Parkinson! What's your favourite cheese?

My favourite cheese is actually goat's cheese.

If Cheryl's watching, she would hurl right now. She hates it.

Really?

Yeah. It's actually goat's cheese.

You got a favourite cheese?

Cathedral City.

-LAUGHTER

-Oh, wow, look at you!

Brilliant. Best answer ever.

Thanks, Emily. Take a seat.

Did you see her mum then? She went "Aw, no!"

OK, next we have a question from Natalie. Where's Natalie?

Here we are. I'll come round to you. Hold on, Natalie.

-We want him to start running around.

-All right! Stand up, Natalie.

-All right?

-It's Natalia.

-Oh, apologies. Natalia.

What's your question for Nicola?

What's your favourite Girls Aloud song?

-I think The Promise.

-The Promise?

-Yeah, lots of nice happy memories around the song.

-Nice.

-Wicked. Good song.

-Great song.

-Sorry I got your name wrong!

Next up, we've got Maeve. Where's Maeve? Here we go.

-What's your question for Nicola?

-Nicola, do you like One Direction?

-Ooh!

-Yes, I do.

I love their new song. And I like Harry.

-Ohhhh! Hello!

-We didn't even need to ask her who her favourite was!

-She was right in there.

-Maeve, I guess you're a fan of One Direction?

-Yeah.

-Who's your favourite?

-Niall.

-Nice!

Thank you very much. OK, the next one is from Joe. Where's Joe?

Oh, he's right here! This is easy for me!

-What's your question for Nicola?

-Who do you like better?

-Sam and Mark or Dick and Dom?

-Ohh!

SHE GASPS

Think very carefully, Nicola!

But be honest.

Sam and Mark.

-Yay!

-Sam and Mark.

-What about you?

-You. Sam and Mark.

Ahh! Good answer, good answer. Sit yourself down.

Next, we've got Hannah. Where's Hannah?

-Oh, oh, oh.

-Over here. OK, here we go.

-Earn your money, Sam.

Excuse me, sorry. Thank you very much. Hannah, stand up.

What's your question for Nicola?

Since going solo, what has been your luckiest day?

That's a good question! Here we go.

Probably just signing my record deal.

That was quite a big day for me, actually.

-So, yeah, I think that.

-Nice one, good question.

Thank you. OK, next up is Olivia.

What's your question for Nicola?

What's one of your favourite moments when you were in Girls Aloud?

-Good question.

-I think probably...

the most poignant ones is probably when we performed at the Brits.

And then we won the Brit, it was a big deal for us.

And then I think all of the tours that we did,

and getting to see the fans every night was always amazing.

And... having the number one album.

So many, like, too many to just name one.

Wow, amazing. Will we ever see Girls Aloud again together?

Um, possibly. It's our tenth anniversary next year.

-Is it really?!

-Yeah, ten years!

-Wow. That's like, what is that?

Paper in wedding years? Something like that!

So I think we'll be celebrating.

Oh, good, nice. Wicked. Thank you very much.

Give yourselves a round of applause.

APPLAUSE

Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Nicola Roberts!

And don't forget, Nicola will be performing Lucky Day live later on.

I tell you, we get all the big names here.

Don't believe me? Check this out.

MUSIC: "Don't Stop The Music" by Rihanna

Now, if you're just tuning in, you only missed us

strap Joe Swash to wheel and give him a right good spin.

Joe ended up getting, in a Wind-Up first, three foams in a row.

But saying that, he did win a mystery prize for himself

which unfortunately for him was another foaming.

-It was good though.

-He took it well.

Now it's time to find another studio victim.

Please give a big hand for the finger of fun!

AUDIENCE: Whoo!

Whoo! Ladies and gentlemen, the finger of fun.

Finger, we need you to select someone that loves having some fun.

So finger of fun, find us someone!

Who's it going to be?

Ohhh...

Who's it going to be?

Oh, it might be you.

Is it going to be you?

Oh...!

-Three people?!

-Wowsas! What are your names?

-Jessica.

-Paige.

-Denise.

Excellent. Well, ladies, get down here,

it's time to have some fun. It's time for The Prize Surprise!

Come on down.

Before we go further, Jessica, it's your birthday! Happy birthday.

CHEERING Hey, and what a birthday it will be.

Guys, have you any idea why we brought you down here?

-No.

-Well, it's because we want to talk to you

about your stepdad/partner. First of all, what's his name?

-Jason.

-Jason. OK, that seems pretty ordinary.

OK. What does Jason do for a living?

-Window fitter.

-He's a window fitter.

-Does he have any hobbies, any interests?

-Erm...

-Not really, he's pretty boring.

-Oh, really?!

Ohh! What does Jason look like?

-Bald.

-He's bald.

-He's bald, is he?

OK. He seems like a lovely bloke.

A lovely, normal, ordinary bloke.

Hold on a minute. I'm a bit confused here.

Are we talking about the same person?

Are you talking about this guy?

THEY LAUGH

-That's your stepdad, yeah?

-That's my man!

Well, I think there's been a slight misunderstanding.

Cos that guy is properly famous.

There's nothing normal or ordinary about him. He's big-time.

-Didn't you know that?

-No.

-What?!

Guys, that is Jase the Face!

-How could you not know?!

-Guys, I can't believe you didn't tell me

your stepdad/partner was Jase the Face.

I think time you found out just how famous Jase the Face really is.

Check this out.

Hello, I'm Ricky and you're watching Newsround.

Move over R-Patz, Bieber and Gaga,

cos there's only one celebrity that everyone is talking about.

And it's this guy, Jase the Face.

Jase-mania has been sweeping the nation

and his famous face has been all over town, quite literally.

Check this out.

PEOPLE CHANT: Jase the Face! Jase the Face!

We love you, Jase!

How big a deal do I want to be?

If I could be half as big as Jase the Face, I'd be happy.

Oh, it's Jase!

-I love his bald head.

-I love his cheesy grin.

Isn't he a dreamboat? Oh! Mwah!

Oh my God! Jase the Face!

Hey, I'm Dynamo.

I want to give a big shout-out to my boy Jase the Face.

And this is his ace.

Jase the Face? He's the inspiration behind my hit song, How We Roll.

It's about his head, because it's so round, so smooth.

Perfect for rolling, if you know what I'm saying.

Jase the Face? One word. Perfection.

Jessica and Paige, your stepdad and his baldy head

are properly famous. What do you make of that?

I think you've got it wrong, that is not my stepdad!

-Oh, I think you'll find it is.

-I think you'll find it is.

Now, we've got more exciting news for you guys

because your stepdad is actually here today.

There he is, arriving at BBC Television Centre.

Let's have a look.

Signing autographs.

Look at that! The crowd are going wild for him.

They absolutely love it, he's signing autographs and all sorts.

He's properly famous... Look at him waving to the crowd!

His adoring public!

Now, guys, I think we've established that your stepdad/partner

has got the most famous face on the planet.

But the big questions is, how well do you know that face?

We're about to find out because shortly,

we're going to be bringing out a line up of baldies.

All you have to do is identify which one is your step dad/partner,

the legendary Jase the Face. I can't wait!

-OK, it sounds simple, right?

-Right.

Wrong - because what we haven't told you is that each of you

will be wearing one of these!

The blindfold of darkness.

It's pretty scary, man.

OK, if you successfully identify Jase the Face,

Jessica and Paige will win today's star prize, a digital camera each.

With a flash on it!

-Yeah, I know. Guys, are you up for the challenge?

-Yeah.

In that case, guys, you need to put one of these on each.

They're Velcro, all mod cons.

Don't get peeking, now! All right. They've got their blindfolds on.

Everyone in the Wind-Up audience, it's time to Bring Out The Baldies!

What a stunning sight this is!

Brilliant. OK, ladies, you just wait there.

Paige, we're just going to bring you over to baldy number one.

Careful, we're just by the edge of the stage here.

Sideward step, OK stay there.

I'm going to bring you over, Paige, as well. Come on.

Don't fall off the stage!

OK, guys, using your sense of touch...

-And smell.

-It's time to find your... Oh, easy!

Easy, Denise!

It's now time to find your stepdad/partner, Jase the Face.

Family, are you happy? ALL: Yeah!

Excellent, OK. In that case, we'll direct you where to come.

Denise, we're number one here, OK?

Jessica, put your hands over there. Paige as well. Careful, careful.

You might have to bend over a bit, there we go. There we go!

-That's number one.

-Have a good feel.

No, definitely not. Jason shaved this morning.

-OK.

-He's got nice eyebrows.

All right.

OK, that's number one. Let's move onto number two.

Go through them all first. Number two, this is the next one.

No, this is number two. This one.

He hasn't got the line, he never shaves properly.

-There's always that bit of line, you know?

-That's definitely not him.

Onto number three, over here.

When I say, "Over here," they don't know, do they?

-It's number one.

-Hang on, I've got another one here.

You've got to feel them all first.

-He's got the line, number one has.

-All right, let's have a look.

-We've only been through three. There's two more.

-There's two more.

Two more. Right, OK. Number four. We've got number four here.

-OK, Jessica.

-Oh, no!

-This is the line.

Definitely this one.

You're on the wrong planet. Come here. Come round here.

Come on, darling.

-I think it's this one.

-All right.

-This is the head.

-Can I feel your muscles?

No, just the head, just the head!

OK, number five.

Can I have a little bit longer?

No! Over here. All right, five over here.

That's what's his name? The exterminator?

So you've had a good feel?

OK, all right, ladies, it's now time for you to identify which

one of these men is the world famous Jase the Face?

This is the star prize for Jessica and Paige.

OK, what are you going for? One or four?

-Uh, no, none of them.

-It's definitely four.

If I were you, I'd listen to Jessica,

she seems like she knows what she's talking about.

-Jessica, what are you saying?

-Four.

-We'll ask the birthday girl.

-We're going for four.

-Let's see if you're right.

Please pull off your blindfolds of darkness! Number four!

APPLAUSE

Well done! The world famous Jase the Face is number four.

-Congratulations!

-Well done.

You're correct, which means that you win a digital camera each.

Well done, guys.

Hey, and how does it feel knowing that your stepdad/partner

is the world famous Jase the Face?

I never knew!

Jase the Face, it's a pleasure having you on the show.

You have all been absolutely amazing.

Audience, please give it up for Jessica, Paige, Jase the Face

and of course our baldy line up.

All right, stick around

because we're not quite done with you just yet.

You have won the right to take part in the gameshow

to end all gameshows, Win The Presenter.

How do you feel about that?

-Oh, yes!

-Oh, yes!

And that is just one of the many great things still to come

on today's show.

Today's special guests, Nicola Roberts

and Joe Swash are seconds away from a right grilling as we play

a game we like to call Truth Or Wind Up?

Talking of Nicola Roberts, she's going to performing her

brilliant single, Lucky Day, in the Wind-Up studio very soon.

And ever wanted to know what happens

when you put a TV presenter in a pair of highly charged underpants?

Keep watching Wind Up to find out.

And keep watching Wind Up to find out what happened

when we carried out the biggest CBBC prank ever.

-Where is he?

-I think he's been sick.

There's no way Ian's going to make it back. I think he really is ill.

Are you all right to do this seriously?

Is this actually genuine? CBBC!

CBBC is the channel for me!

It makes me want to go hee hee!

Later on this afternoon...

What's he done?!

The sound machine - it's wrecked the Blue Peter greenhouse.

Yes, it's our biggest hidden camera prank yet.

It's coming soon to Wind-Up.

Welcome to the part of the show where we sort the wheat from the chaff.

And get you some answers.

And providing us with those answers are Joe Swash and Nicola Roberts.

All right. Joe and Nicola are stood on the Truth Or Wind Up podiums.

They're on them because we're going to ask them to confirm or deny

a series of questions we've spent weeks intensively researching.

He says that, we stuck their names into Google to see what happened.

-It's all true on there, isn't it?

-Hey, we're about to find out, Mark.

OK, this is going to be intense. Celebs, are you ready?

-Yes, we're ready.

-Ready.

-They're ready.

-Are you ready?

Intense.

They're ready. Cameras, are you ready?

Wow! They're ready. In that case, let's go.

Fact one...

Joe Swash is half man, half dog.

Audience, truth or wind-up?

ALL: Wind-up!

-All right, all right.

-All right, all right.

Cool your jets.

All right, the audience is saying a lot of truth there which is odd.

Joe Swash, truth or wind-up?

Yeah, that's a wind-up. Sorry, guys.

Explain more. What's all this about?

Well... I'm a little bit...

I've got a little bit of hair on my back in patches...

I wouldn't say that was kind of wolf-like.

Joe, we heard this comes from the fact that

when you appeared on This Morning, you was doing

something like a dog item and you ended up eating dog food.

No, I didn't! Don't believe Google!

That's what we got on Google!

I've eaten a lot of things but I've not eaten dog food.

Have you not? OK, so it is a wind-up.

Wind-up, wind-up! Fact two...

Did we lie then? Sorry.

Nicola and Kate Middleton to form brand new girl band

Princesses Aloud?

Truth or wind-up, audience?

ALL: Wind-up!

I think the consensus is... all right, you've had your say.

The consensus is wind-up. What's the answer?

As much as I love the princess,

it's a wind-up.

Where did this shoddy information come from then?

Google!

You're right.

But didn't you say that you'd love for Kate to perform with you?

Uh... no!

Brilliant! I might as well just chuck this away!

Fact three...

Joe Swash to make sensational EastEnders return as a woman!

Audience, truth or wind-up?

THEY SHOUT

All right, thanks, audience.

Thanks for your opinions.

OK. A lot of truth in there.

Joe, truth or wind-up?

Well, my mum does say I've got lovely, delicate ankles.

No, unfortunately I don't go back as a woman, no.

But are you going back?

I do go back for a couple of episodes...

BOTH: Yeah!

-I'm as Mickey again.

-Wicked, cool.

Fact four...

What was that?

Nicola trashes Kimberley Walsh's bedroom

as slumber party gets out of control?

Audience, truth or wind-up?

THEY SHOUT

All right, all right. A lot of truth. Is that a truth or wind-up?

I am probably the messiest out of all of us

but I didn't trash her house.

It's a wind-up, you see. Yeah. Did you have a slumber party though?

We have lots of slumber parties.

It's half true then, that's all right.

OK, fact five...

Joe Swash holds the world record for pancake throwing. Ah!!

Audience, truth or wind-up?

That's a bit of a mixed bag. Thank you, audience, thank you.

Bit of a mixed bag. Surely this can't be true. Or can it?

-Joe Swash, truth or wind-up?

-I'm in the big book, baby!

No! It's true?

Yeah, I'm in the Guinness World Records book for tossing

-the most amount of pancakes.

-That's unbelievable.

I'm in twice and the other one was for walking upstairs with

-books on my head.

-Wow!

I didn't choose to do these, people asked me to.

-That's amazing, I love it.

-Thank you.

-A man of many talents.

-Indeed.

Fantastic. Well, thanks for clearing those facts up, guys.

Please give it up for Joe and Nicola.

Hey, I tell you what is a truth and not a wind-up,

one family is about to win either me or Mark.

It's time for Win The Presenter.

Win The Presenter, do you realise what those four words mean?

Well, let me ask you this, what would you rather win?

£1 million or one of us?

When people look back at this century,

what are they going to remember?

-They royal wedding.

-Not that.

-The Olympics.

-No.

-Jedward?

No, Win The Presenter.

Welcome to Win The Presenter.

Let's find out which presenter they're playing for today.

He can sit, he can give you a paw, he can even roll over.

He's man's best friend, it's Sam Dixon.

Which means it's time to meet your host, Mr Mark Rhodes.

Yes, welcome to Win The Presenter, the part of the show where

two families go head to head to win Mr Sam Dixon. There he is.

-You love this part of the show, don't you, Sam?

-It's brilliant.

Why don't I believe you?

Well, let's meet the families who could be taking Sam home

after the show. Now, Amber, we met you and your rock nan earlier.

Would you like to introduce us to the rest of your family, please?

This is my mum, Helen. That's my mum's friend, Sam.

Awesome, well, give it up for the Spear family, everyone.

OK, well, to get your hands on him,

you're going to have to beat Jase the Face's family.

Ladies and gentlemen, we are in the company of a true legend here.

It's only Jase the Face.

Now, guys, have you had a chance to get your head around the fact

that your stepdad is now a major celebrity?

-Still in shock at the moment.

-Just seeing him is amazing for me.

The face, I can't believe I didn't guess it.

Well, good luck. Give it up for Jase the Face's family.

Now, families, if you want some inspiration

about what to do with this special prize, take a look at what our last

winning family got up to when they won the presenter.

-ALL: Hi, Mark.

-Hi, you all right?

-We've been waiting for you.

-I know!

Ooh, tea, nice.

No time for tea.

< Mark!

-So, guys, what are we playing?

-We're playing football.

You're here to clean.

Mr Rhodes, you are looking fit.

Mark, you haven't got time for that.

Walk the dog, hey, how hard could that be?

This way. No?

MARK LAUGHS AND SCREAMS

-Thanks, Mark.

-Pleasure.

I can't believe I am going to say this,

but I hope that's given some ideas for the Spear family

and Jase the Face's family.

Back to me in the studio. Looking good.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

So, Spears, any yucky jobs you think Sam could do very well?

Clean the hamster.

-And Dad wanted him to do the painting.

-Oh, wow.

-He's going to be busy.

-And Mum said he could do the drains.

-The drains as well! You'll be busy, Sam.

-Brilliant(!)

What about you, Jase the Face's family?

Jason wants him to do poop-a-scooping

-because our dogs poop all the time.

-He can make us fajitas.

Lovely. He's good at cooking, he likes that.

Look at his face. I hate that!

Right, it's the best of three rounds.

Let's kick things off with round number one, it's Celebrity Friends.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

You'll never guess what Sam's done,

he's hidden one of his friends inside that cake.

-Sam, what are you like?

-I'm a silly sausage.

Yeah, you are.

Families, all you need to do is guess the identity

of that celebrity. You'll take it in turns

to ask Sam a question where he can only answer by saying yes or no.

If you can't think of a question or take too long,

I'll move on to the next family.

-First family to guess the celebrity wins.

-Do you understand?

-Yes.

-Fantastic. We tossed a coin backstage earlier,

which means that the Spear family are going to go first.

OK, off you go.

Is it a man?

No.

-Is he is famous as Jase the Face?

-No... But yes, really.

Is it a pop star?

-No.

-Actress?

-No.

-Presenter?

-No.

-Is she a model?

-No.

-Is it a human being?

-Yes!

-Is she blonde?

No.

-Is she brunette?

-No.

-Grey?

Yes.

Has she been on telly recently?

Yes...ish.

-Is it the Queen?

-Oooh, maybe.

-It is, isn't it?

-Maybe. Maybe.

So you're saying that Sam has hidden the Queen inside that cake?

-Yes.

-Let's find out if you're right.

Cake covered up celeb, please reveal yourself.

It's the Queen.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Wow.

Please say hello and goodbye to the Queen. Bye!

AUDIENCE CHEERS

Wow! The Queen and Jase the Face on the one show.

After the first round, the scores are

Jase the Face's family have one point,

the Spear family yet to get off the mark.

You know what? I feel the need, the need for speed.

It's time for even more Celebrity Friends.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Ladies and gentlemen, please give it up

for today's celebrity friend Joe Swash

and our very own Mr Sam Nixon!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Get away! Sabotage!

Now, play nice, lads.

Get your wing mirrors in check.

-Could you rehearse a bit, you're a bit...

-Sorry, sorry, sorry.

Hold on, you cheat.

As you can see, Sam and Joe have both come prepared.

Jenson Button and Lewis Hamilton, watch and learn.

I don't think so. Families, your job is to decide

who you think will win the race between Sam and Joe.

Before you make that decision, let me talk you through the course.

First, they will have to go out of the studio, pass the hairpin,

there we go, over the slalom,

through to the see-saw of truth and desire,

and then you have got the two-tyre bend,

and hopefully cross the line first two to the finish.

Families, you can write down your answers now.

Who do you think is going to win?

Audience, who do think is going to win out of Sam and Joe?

AUDIENCE SHOUT FOR BOTH

It's 50-50.

All right, audience, thank you.

Now, Joe, you're a bit of a boy racer.

What do you drive normally?

Are you taking the mickey? I can't drive.

I haven't got a licence!

He hasn't got a licence! Sam, you got any trash talk?

You're going down, Joe.

Terrible trash talk.

OK, well, it was 50-50 in the audience.

OK, families, stop writing.

It is time to race.

Gentlemen, start your engines/electronic thing.

That was an accident.

Go! Go! Go!

Oh, Sam has got the early lead.

You're cheating!

Remember you've got to go on the outside.

It's close. On the outside, on the outside!

You've got to go through the tyres

on the outside first. Excellent.

He's coming back. Oh, he's coming back.

Look at this.

The inside at the see-saw. Sam's took a good line there.

It's going to be close.

-My wheel's come off.

-No!

It is going to be Sam here.

No! No! No! No! No! No! No!

No.

No. I'm sorry.

Cut the music. Cut the music. I'm sorry,

I am not having that kind of trash driving in my establishment.

Joe is disqualified for not completing the course properly

which means Sam is the winner!

CHEERING

Here he comes.

I'm sorry, you've got to play by the rules, young man.

-I've been robbed.

-What have you got to say for yourself?

It was a bad start, I'm sorry if you voted for me.

We're going to find out right now. Spears, what was you guess?

-Joe.

-Joe, OK.

Jase the Face's family?

-We were let down.

-Oh no! You both went for Joe.

-At least I let both of them down.

-That's doubly bad, then.

The scores are one to Jase the Face's family

and nil to the Spear family. OK, which means it's time

for Sam to put on a pair of underpants outside his trousers.

It's time for Presenter Under Pressure.

This part of the show has an 18 certificate

because, as you will see, Sam has donned the "underpants of chaos".

Oh, yes.

I will be asking Sam a number of questions

about one of his favourite subjects.

The television show Friends. I thought you would like that.

Every time he enters a question incorrectly or takes too long,

I will be sending a shock right through those pants.

Don't give it to them.

Press that red button and see if it's working.

Yes!

Yeah, OK.

Jase the Face's family, press that red button really hard.

SAM WHOOPS

All right, I'll just have a go as well.

It's working, working really well.

Thanks very much for that, families, you've saved me a job.

You have to guess how many questions out of ten

Sam will correctly answer.

You have ten seconds to write down your answer.

You're a big fan of Friends, aren't you?

There's over 200 episodes.

-How many times have you seen each episode?

-Probably 200 times.

So that it's like...

Loads.

Time's up, guys. OK.

All right, enough idle chit-chat,

it's time to throw in some tension music and dramatic lighting.

Oooh, I like it.

Viewers of a nervous disposition, look away now.

Sam, your ten questions start now.

What are the first names of the six main characters in friends?

Joey, Phoebe, Rachel Chandler, Monica, Joey, Ross.

Yes, OK.

How many episodes of Friends were there?

200. An odd? 250.

236.

SAM SCREAMS

What animals did Chandler and Joey keep as pets?

-A chick and a duck.

-Yes.

-What was the name of Ross's English wife?

-Emily.

We need a second name.

Shut up! Dunstable.

-No.

-SAM SCREAMS

Emily Waltham.

In which US soap

does Joey get to play the role of Dr Drake Ramoray?

-Days Of Our Lives.

-How many sisters does Joey any have?

-Seven.

-Correct.

-What was the name of Ross's pet monkey?

-Marcel.

-Correct.

Unbelievable.

Brad Pitt appeared in the show, what was his character's name?

-Oh no!

-Time's up.

-SAM SCREAMS

-It was Will.

What is the name of the coffee house which features in the show?

-Central Perk.

-Correct.

-What is the name of the actor who plays Chandler?

-Matthew Perry.

Correct. Well done!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

I told you he was a big fan.

That's brilliant. That's your ten questions.

I can tell you you've got seven right!

Not bad.

But the one remaining question is, how did our families do?

We will start with the Spears.

How many did you think Sam would get? Seven! That's not bad.

Well done, that's bang on.

Jase the Face's family, what do you say? Seven as well!

Wow, that means that Jase the Face's family have won two out of three.

Congratulations! Sam, come on over.

Jase the Face's family, you have won the presenter.

Spears, have you enjoyed yourselves?

You've been brilliant.

Give it up for the Spears, everyone.

You've been fantastic.

Nice work.

Family! What are you doing standing here?

Go and get your prize, claim him!

-Nice pants again, Sam.

-Cheers, mate.

-Lovely.

A big thank you to all the stars of today's show.

We had Jase the Face's family. the Spear family, fantastic.

Joe Swash, he was brilliant, wasn't he?

We had the Queen,

thank you, Ma'am, for coming on the show, much appreciated.

All that's left to say is, do with him what you will,

but make sure he comes back next week's because I'll miss him.

See you, Sam, bye.

Bye! Look at that.

Right now, ladies and gentlemen,

give it up for Nicola Roberts and her latest single Lucky Day.

# Could it be my, could it be my Could it be my lucky day?

# Could it be my, could it be my Could it be my lucky day?

# Could it my, could it be my

# Could it be my lucky day?

# Could it be my, could it be my # Could it be my lucky day?

# I like a phone call

# I like to hear something like this

# Woah, woah, woah, woah

# A conversation

# That maybe leads into a kiss

# Mwah, mwah, mwah, mwah

# Aah, say that you love me

# Say that you need me too

# Best you ever had

# It could be so easy

# For you to please me, baby

# So how come you tease me?

# You told me so what do you say?

# Are you gonna take this golden opportunity?

# Won't you give it to me because you've got what I want

# Maybe it's my lucky day

# Just light the first spark

# And watch the fireworks explode

# Boom, boom, baby

# You've got a fast car

# So why the hell we driving slow?

# Zoom, zoom, zoom to me

# Kisses on my pillow

# I've hundreds of those though

# I want something more

# So congratulations

# It's not the occasion

# The day when I get my own way

# You told me so what do you say?

# Are you gonna take this golden opportunity?

# Won't you give it to me because you've got what I want

# Maybe it's my lucky day

# Gonna be my lu-uh-uh-uh

# My lucky da-ay, my lucky day

# So, what do you say?

# Are you gonna take this golden opportunity?

# Just give it to me because you've got what I want

# Maybe it's my lucky day my, my lucky day

# Could it be my, could it be my

# Could it be my lucky day?

# Could it be my Could it be my

# Could it be my lucky day?

# Day, day, day

# Maybe it's my lucky day

# You told me so what do you say?

# Are you gonna take this golden opportunity?

# Won't you give it to me because you've got what I want

# Maybe it's my lucky day

# My day, day, day

# Maybe it's my lucky day

# Day, day, day

# Maybe it's my lucky day day, day

# Maybe it's my lucky day. #

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd