Lawson Sam & Mark's Big Friday Wind Up

'It's Friday, it's the weekend,

'and this lot are champing at the bit, because it's time for

'a brand-new Big Friday Wind-Up.

'There's just two things missing - Sam and Mark. Where could they be?'

'Are they there?

'Are they there?'

We're up here. We're up here.

BOTH: Hello.

We have gone up in the world, my friends.

On this week's Wind-Up, we thought we'd take it to another level.

-Are you guys ready?

-ALL: Yes.

-Sam, are you ready?

-I'm ready. Are you ready, Mark?

-I am SO ready.

Are you guys ready?

In that case, run those titles!

# Wind me up, put me down Start me up and watch me go

# It's easy once you know how it's done

# You can't stop now it's already begun... #

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

'Ladies and gentlemen, Big Friday Wind-Up is back,

'and here they are, the amazing, the talented, the unforgettable,

'what are their names again? Oh, yes, Sam and Mark!'

# Since you been gone since you been gone

# I'm out of my head can't take it

# Could I be wrong but since you been gone

# You cast a spell so break it... #

-Yes! Nice twirl.

-Thanks, mate.

-Welcome to the weekend!

-It's Sam...

-It's Mark.

-It's Big...

-It's Friday...

And we're winding people up.

Put it all together and what have you got?

-A big Sam Wind-Up Friday Mark?

-Not quite.

It's Sam and Mark's Big Friday Wind-Up!

CHEERING

There'll be more surprises than you can shake several sticks at.

Coming up, we've got prizes, challenges

and more than a few shocks in store for members of our studio audience.

It could be any one of you guys! Any one of you! I'm watching you.

He is watching you.

Yes, in a moment, someone here will be forced to watch

a family member doing something very embarrassing.

And later on, some of you could be competing for prizes with the help

of tonight's special guests. It's Lawson!

CHEERING

-Love Lawson.

-Love 'em. Eh, it doesn't stop there, you know.

Because, we'll also be seeing what happened when Tracy Beaker author,

Dame Jacqueline Wilson, helped us prank this young lady.

Oh!

PC BUZZES

That's my only copy of my new book!

That's coming up later, but before that,

remember, the first rule of Big Friday Wind-Up -

BOTH: No-one is safe.

You'd better be on your guard, right now, because it's time

for Sam and I to get to know some of you a little better.

Let's go!

-Thanking you.

-Thank you.

So-o-o, let me see who we have here.

Look at all your lovely faces.

Who am I going to go to?

Mmm. I am going to go...

..to you, Amelia. How are you doing?

She went, "Oh-h!"

Now, I know that your mum can be a little bit embarrassing.

-Is that right?

-Yes.

-Why is she embarrassing? Is she sitting here?

-Hello. You all right?

-Yeah.

-Why is she embarrassing?

She sings in Tesco and she doesn't even realise, everywhere.

She hears a song that she likes... # La-la-la-la. #

-There you go.

-Yeah, all right.

-So you do that in public?

-Yeah.

-Would you like to do it in public now?

-OK.

-I'll help ya. We'll all help ya. What song do you want to sing?

-Oh!

-I like Take That.

-We all love Take That.

-What do you want to sing?

-Shine by Take That.

Let's do it. Come on, stand up. Where are we going from?

CHEERING

# You, you such a big star to me

# You're everything I wanna be

# But you're stuck in a hole

# And I want you to get out Out

# No place to see

# But I know it's time for you to leave... #

I can't remember the rest!

Brilliant. A round of applause!

Oh, Sam! Good luck with doing any better than that.

Other supermarkets are available. OK.

I am now going to come and speak to...

-you, Kelly. Hello, Kelly. How are you doing?

-Good, thanks.

I have heard that your mum is a little bit embarrassing.

She is a bit obsessive of celebrities.

-Really?

-Yeah.

-This is your mum right here? Rita?

-Yeah.

-Hi, Rita, how are you?

-Hi!

-Oh.

So are you a bit obsessive then, when it comes to celebrities?

-Yeah, a bit.

-What kind of things does she do?

She's embarrassed me quite a lot.

We met S Club Seven, and she told Rachel Stevens she was small.

-Really?

-Yeah.

-That probably didn't go down very well.

-No, no.

-Interesting.

-She told you last week that we preferred Ant and Dec.

Brilliant(!) OK, Mark, good luck beating that. Can you beat it?

Prefer Dick and Dom meself, but whatever.

All right, so, I'll try my best, Sam, I don't know, I don't know.

Oww, I don't think we have, actually.

We can't do any better than that, so we might as well go to the next item.

Hang on a minute, sorry, can I just sit here? Is it all right?

-I just sit on your lap for a minute. What's your name, mate?

-Jordan.

Jordan. Well, I know that, actually.

-Because is this your brother, Benjamin?

-Yes.

-How are you doing, lads, you enjoying the show so far?

-Yes, thanks.

Hey, it's good to have you here. How are you doing?

-I'm good.

-Is this all right?

-That's lovely.

-Fantastic!

I tell you what else I know.

I know that you have an auntie who's a tad embarrassing. Is that right?

-What kind of thing does she do?

-A bit of dishy dancing.

-Dishy dancing?

-Does she? She like her dancing?

-Yeah.

-Cool, all right.

So she fancies herself as a bit of a dancer.

What type of dancing does she do?

She dances to like, things like Fame and just musicals and then,

when the radio is on and her favourite song comes up,

-she just dances.

-Is that true?

-Yes.

-Yes. Oh, I bet that's embarrassing for you.

-Yes. Very embarrassing.

Is she the only member of your family that likes dancing in that way?

-No, not really.

-No.

My dad....

This is getting worse by the second, don't you think?

-Yes.

-Yeah, it is. Well, your mum's here. I'm sitting on her lap!

So you got nothing to worry about there and your dad,

he couldn't make it, could he, so you're all right.

-But I think you know what I'm going to say, don't you?

-No.

-Don't you?

Yeah, we've got your auntie waiting backstage.

She's going to do a little bit of dancing.

Give it up for Auntie Sam, everyone.

CHEERING

MUSIC: "You Never Can Tell" by Chuck Berry

Wow!

That was fantastic. That was really good,

but actually, it was missing something.

It was missing a middle-aged man who can do backflips.

-Do you know anybody who could do that?

-My dad.

-Yeah? Your dad?

-Yeah.

-All right. We better introduce him then, hadn't we?

Give it up for Benjamin and Jordan's dad, Carawain!

MUSIC: "Agadoo" by Black Lace

MUSIC: "I Am The Music Man" by Black Lace

MUSIC: "Mamma Mia" by Abba

MUSIC: "The Birdy Song" by The Tweets

CHEERING

Come here, you guys, come here! Well done!

Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Auntie Sam and dad, Carawain.

CHEERING

I absolutely love that lads, but what did you think of that?

-Very embarrassing.

-Very embarrassing, indeed.

Don't you worry yourself, because this is your chance

to get your own back on your dad Carawain. You go and get ready, mate,

and, you two, you need to come with me,

because it's time to play Dad On A Wheel! Come on!

Benjamin and Jordan's dad is just getting "ready", shall we say,

-backstage.

-Lads, are you ready to see

-what we've done to him?

-BOTH: Yes.

-Audience, are you ready?

-ALL: Yes.

In that case, everyone, please give it up for Dad On A Wheel!

CHEERING

# Boy you turn me

# Inside out and round and round... #

Here he is, here he is. You look great! How are you feeling?

-Great!

-Feeling great, good.

This is great.

How on earth do you play Dad On A Wheel, I hear you ask?

Well, it's really quite simple.

As you can see, the wheel has three gold sections.

Now, if dad lands on dad, he'll win himself a prize.

CHEERING

-Be nice, wouldn't it, Dad?

-It would be great.

-It would.

Better still, you'll like this, audience,

if Dad lands on audience, every one of you will win a prize!

CHEERING

But, even better still, if Dad lands on star,

then Jordan and Benjamin win a prize.

CHEERING

I suppose, what we're trying to say is, gold is good, yeah?

Red, on the other hand,

is bad!

DRUM ROLL

Actually, it's not that bad, because if Dad lands in the red section,

the lads get to foam him.

CHEERING

He don't like that, he don't like that. Guys, are you ready?

-BOTH: Yes. Fantastic.

-Dad, ready?

-Yeah, no.

Yeah, no!

In that case, spin that dad and make him squeal, come on, Sam...

AUDIENCE: Wind up that wheel!

Here we go.

CHEERING

Oh-hoo-hoo!

It's landed on Dad, which means you've just won yourself a prize.

Let's see what it's.

It's a surprise that every dad needs - a box of retro sweets!

CHEERING

-Dad, are you ready for your second spin?

-No.

Sorry, it's going to come. Here we go.

CHEERING

Ohh!

Can't believe it.

You have just won yourself another prize, and it's a travel mug!

CHEERING

We're running out of dad prizes, man.

-You're cleaning up.

-OK, it's time for the third and final prize.

-Shall we try and get these lads a prize?

-No.

-What about the audience?

-Yeah, no!

Must be a foaming, then, let's go!

CHEERING

CHEERING

Lads, if you'd like to take your positions. I'll tell you when.

This is good. I am so glad this is happening. OK,

in three, two, one... release the foam!

CHEERING

In the face, in the face!

Stop! Stop!

-How are you feeling?

-Wet!

Wet. So, that means at the end of Dad On A Wheel,

you got yourself two prizes and you got a foaming!

Well done, lads, well done.

I'll tell you what, lads, when you did get to foam him,

you did it well, you really did.

Right, let's hear it for Carawain, Benjamin and Jordan, everyone.

CHEERING

Now, it's time for something completely different.

Please say hello to our special guests, it's Lawson.

CHEERING

BOTH: Hello, lads!

THEY EXCHANGE GREETINGS

Lads, can we just say from the off, we're so happy

that you are on our little show.

-We're honoured, honoured to be here.

-Thank you. You enjoying yourselves?

-Yeah, loving it.

-Brilliant. We've got a few questions for you.

Do you have to be, like, chiselled, to be in your band, because you guys,

you look like you've been carved out of stone! It's not fair.

That's why we're not actually sitting next to them!

-Look at you boys, look at you!

-How underdressed we are!

-Get off.

I am in a yellow T-shirt.

You can definitely pull it off though, Ryan, I must admit.

Actually, we played a little prank on you guys earlier,

when you arrived at your dressing room. Take a look at what happened.

-Let's take a look.

-Here we go.

'Cheers, lovely, thank you very much.'

HE SCREAMS

THEY TALK OVER EACH OTHER

This stops, now!

CHEERING

Lads, what were you thinking when a large gorilla jumped out at you?

It was Adam who took the fall,

because he was the first man to go in the door.

It was quite a slow shock, because it was a sliding door.

So it kind of slid back and it was quite dark in there, as well.

First of all, they said this was our dressing room,

and I opened the door, and the first thing I saw was a toilet.

I thought this is more of a toilet than a dressing room,

-but go with it!

-That's how we treat our guests on the show!

We've had worse!

If you don't mind, we're going to get our lovely audience to

-ask you a few questions.

-They're champing at the bit. Sam, off you go.

OK, who's got a question for Lawson?

Let's go right over here, this top corner.

-Stand up, stand up. Here we go, what's your name?

-Ewan.

-Ewan, what's your question?

-Have you got a favourite band?

-Have you got a favourite band?

-Great question that, Ewan.

I think our favourite bands are like The Script, you like The Script?

-Maroon 5. Any others, boys?

-Kings Of Leon.

A favourite band of ours. Yes, what about you, Ewan?

-Em, I quite like...

-Lawson?

-Definitely, definitely!

Definitely, definitely, Ewan says! Who else has got a question?

-OK, let's go over here.

-Cheers, Ewan.

-What's your name?

-My name is Tony.

-What's your question for Lawson?

-Well actually, this is for Andy.

-Of course, yeah! Is he your favourite?

-I love Andy.

-What's your question for Andy?

-I want to know if he gets his good looks off his dad?

-Interesting.

Andy, Andy, do you get your good looks off your dad?

I definitely don't!

-And who might you be, Tony?

-I'm his dad!

CHEERING

OK, who else has got a question? Let's go over here, let's go here.

Let's go to the next block. Come on, then, stand up.

-What's your name?

-Maisie.

-Maisie. What's your question for Lawson?

Do you ever feel threatened by The Wanted or One Direction

when you write your music?

ALL: Ohhh! Leave the best till last, shall we?

Do we feel threatened by The Wanted or One Direction?

I think...we love those guys. We're really good friends with both

One Direction and The Wanted, but I think we're so different to them.

We're like, we're more of a band.

You know what I mean? We compare ourselves more to Maroon 5

or The Script. But you know, what those guys are doing in America

and all over the world, it's like amazing, isn't it?

And we're great friends with the guys, so we wish them

-all the luck in the world.

-I think there's enough room for everyone!

-Who's your favourite?

-Lawson!

-Lawson, yeah!

CHEERING

Well, guys, thank you very much for your questions.

They were all right, weren't they? Great questions.

Round of applause for the audience.

-He's back!

-Hello, I'm back.

-Hey, you're getting quicker.

-I'm back.

-Lads, stick around,

because you'll be performing and playing a game with some members

-of our lovely audience. How does that sound, good?

-Brilliant.

Right, please, give it up one more time for the brilliant Lawson!

CHEERING

Now, it's time to say hello to some very special friends of ours.

Give it up for Chantelle and her mum, Selina.

CHEERING

THEY EXCHANGE GREETINGS

-Are you enjoying the show?

-Yes.

-Excellent.

Chantelle, you are here because, not so long ago, we got you good

and proper with our hidden cameras, didn't we?

-Yes.

-Yes, we did!

-You're a big fan of a certain author, aren't you?

-Could you tell everybody what author it is?

-Jacqueline Wilson.

Very good, very good.

She's is the lovely lady who writes the Tracy Beaker books.

That's correct, isn't it?

And you love her so much that you own pretty much everything

that she's written, yeah?

-Yes. Two more books and I've got them all!

-Wow!

-Two more books!

Two more books.

Well, when we heard that, we thought we'd play a prank on you,

involving the lovely woman herself.

You thought that you were just going down to London

-for a lovely day out, didn't you?

-Yeah.

-Yeah, you did. Interesting.

But things started to get a little strange,

-and the best thing about it, your mum, Selina, hello...

-Hi.

-You were in on the whole thing, weren't ya?

-Yes.

-She knew! Sneaky!

Do we want to see

-what happened, guys?

-ALL: Yes.

In that case, Chantelle, looked down camera three and do the honours.

Run VT!

So there's our Wind-Up actor, Barry.

He's pretending he works for top author Jacqueline Wilson.

Listen, there's a family coming now.

And there's Chantelle, our massive Jacqueline Wilson fan, with her

mum and dad, who are both in on the wind-up.

Excuse me, listen, I'm a publicist for an author.

She's probably our country's leading author, Dame Jacqueline Wilson.

We're doing a host today, for Tracy Beaker.

-Have you heard of Jacqueline Wilson?

-I've got all the books!

-You got what, sorry?

-All the books.

-That's great, thank you!

Thank you, thank you! You know Tracy Beaker is very big

in the UK, but she isn't very big in the United States.

So, Dame Jacqueline is trying to push it today.

We're launching it. It's my job to bring the actress...

-Dani Harmer.

-You know, here you do my job!

And...you know more than I do.

I'm supposed to arrange for Dani Harmer to come

and do a photoshoot today. She's just got off the plane.

Unfortunately, we're going to miss the American deadlines.

It's pointless her coming down,

so would you mind standing in for Dani Harmer, just to do a little

photoshoot and answer a couple of questions?

Listen, I tell you what, I'll give you a VIP tour guide!

SHE SCREAMS

Don't get carried away, you've got to do some work.

-Is that all right?

-SELINA: That's fine.

Listen, thank you, I could give you a really big kiss.

I'm not going to give you a big kiss.

-Chantelle, thank you.

-Thank you.

Chantelle has agreed to help out,

so Barry puts her in a special visitor jacket, which contains

a hidden microphone so we can hear everything she says.

Who needs Dani Harmer when we've got Chantelle? Welcome to the BBC.

So Chantelle thinks she is stepping into Dani Harmer's shoes

for the day. And after a quick tour around the BBC, it's time for her

to hit the photo studio, fake photo studio, that is.

Now, let me explain what we're doing.

We're launching Tracy Beaker in the United States.

Obviously, Dani Harmer can't be with us today,

so thank you, once again, seriously, for standing in.

No, honestly, because we couldn't do it without you.

I am going to take some photographs of you, because in America,

they don't know what Tracy Beaker looks like.

So, let's just send in pictures of Chantelle instead!

Need you to relax. Just shake your arms, that's it. Just relax.

Put your arms up in the air,

like you've arrived off the plane in America.

-Hello America!

-Hello, America!

-Excellent.

Put this arm straight up.

Now, that is a good one.

Actually, you look like a young Tracy Beaker, suddenly.

So, let's make Chantelle look even more like Tracy Beaker,

with a Tracy Beaker outfit.

And a Tracy Beaker wig.

I'm Tracy Beaker!

Chuck in some stars and stripes and pom-poms,

and you've got Tracy Beaker, American-style.

I am Tracy Beaker in America!

Now, let's crank things up a notch. Over to you, Sam.

I am about to call Barry,

posing as an American journalist, hoping to interview Dani Harmer.

PHONE RINGS

-It's ringing.

-Hello?

Hi, it's Jeff, calling from America to interview Dani.

-Just going to put you on hold for a second.

-Yeah, sure, yeah.

This is a big journalist in America.

Barry has to convince Chantelle to pretend to be Dani.

Let's hope my American accent holds up.

If there's anything you don't know, just make up the answer or ask me.

-In fact, I'll put him on speakerphone.

-OK.

-Hello?

-'Hi, Dani.'

-How are you doing?

-I'm fine, thank you. You?

-'Very good, thank you.'

Listen, we are SO excited about Tracy Beaker coming to the States.

'So, listen, I just got a few questions

-'I'd like to ask you, if that's OK?'

-Yeah, of course.

Question one is, what age were you when you started acting

and how did you get into it?

I was ten years old, and this was my first show.

OK, question two is,

how has playing the role of Tracy Beaker changed your life?

It's changed my life for good. It...

SHE PAUSES

..in many ways.

It's made me rich.

Dani, I got to say, once you come over to the States,

you're about to get a lot richer!

Question three, why do you think the Americans will love

Tracy Beaker as much as the Brits do?

Well, she's got a lot of attitude and she makes people happy.

Dani, thank you so much. Listen, we look forward

to seeing you when you come over to the States.

-Thank you, bye.

-Bye.

-It was easy, wasn't it?

-Hard.

-Why was it hard?

-Because he sounded a bit French.

LAUGHTER

-French?

-That's the worst accent, ever!

French? How dare you!

I was doing my best American accent.

MARK MIMICS SAM

Do you think you'd really get away with pretending to be Tracy Beaker?

-No.

-Why not?

Er...no!

Well, you certainly looked the part.

-That was a great wig.

-It was.

-Brilliant wig.

What we've just seen was only the start of it,

because you were about to meet your idol.

-Come here, I want to tell you something.

-OK.

My little gift to you for helping me today, is that,

Chantelle, you are going to meet Dame Jacqueline Wilson.

-SELINA: Oh my gosh, Chan!

-As a thank you from me to you.

She's in the garden and she's been doing interviews all day

because she is launching her book, Emerald Star.

-You excited? You going to be able to speak when you get there?

-Yes!

-You're not going to let me down?

-No!

-Good afternoon, young lady.

Good afternoon, Dame.

So, Chantelle's about to meet her idol, and because Jacqueline Wilson

is a Dame, Barry is pretending she's got to curtsy when she meets her.

MARK: And remember, Jacqueline is also in on the wind-up.

-Hello!

-Remember what we said, nice and loudly

-and curtsy.

-Good morning, Dame.

-Afternoon!

-Good afternoon, Dame.

Nice and low! A lot lower. That's it. Afternoon, Dame Jacqueline.

-Sorry.

-How very sweet of you, darling! Come and sit down.

So she's curtsied, and now it's time for the interview,

and you guessed it, we've made up all the questions.

I heard you used to want to be a lollipop lady when you were younger?

When did you change your mind and want become a writer?

Is it true that one you've started writing a book, you refuse

to cut your fingernails until it's finished?

Is it true that you won't have the colour pink in your house

because you're scared of it?

No, sorry, I am just reading these off the cards!

-These are strange questions!

-Yes.

Now it's Jacqueline's turn to crank things up,

by pretending she's become an illustrator.

For my next book, I'm going to have to do the drawings myself.

I've actually, while I've been sat out here, I have done some.

-Do you want to see?

-Yes.

-OK.

-Amazing.

-I've tried my hardest.

See that one? I thought this might be a new Tracy Beaker story.

See I've got all her curls there?

MARK: Of course, Jacqueline isn't being serious,

but Chantelle doesn't know that and, even better,

she seems to be buying it.

-What do you think?

-They're good!

-Do you think so?

-Yes.

-That's very kind.

-Brilliant.

Chantelle did extremely well there to keep a straight face.

MARK: Of course, Jacqueline is sticking to writing,

and all her manuscripts are kept on her laptop.

I have to be very, very careful, because I write them

all on my laptop and I never take any copies, because I had

a bit of trouble with somebody showing a copy around, so I keep

just the one copy on the laptop, so I have to guard it very carefully.

I am so sorry to interrupt.

You have the appointment, just to sign the book.

Oh, yes. If I nip out... I'll just leave the laptop there.

What! Leave the laptop there?

You mean, the laptop that Chantelle thinks contains

the only copy of your brand-new book?

Is that really a good idea?

-So, what did you think of Dame Jacqueline Wilson?

-Wow!

We're going to tidy up. Just hold that for me.

-What did you think of her drawings?

-He-he-he!

-Be honest.

-They were...

-OK.

-Yeah. That's one way of putting it(!) Can you take...

MARK: I'd be careful with that, Barry.

Oh, no! You've just spilled tea all over Jacqueline Wilson's laptop!

And that buzzing doesn't sound good, Barry.

CHANTELLE SHRIEKS

-It's blown up.

-'You think?

'You've destroyed Jacqueline Wilson's only copy of her new book.'

-All her stories are on that.

-What are we going to say?

-I don't know.

Sit down, just pretend everything is normal.

But things are far from normal, and here comes Jacqueline, now.

What's going on?

It's just that we had a slight accident actually

-and we just dropped...

-Not with the laptop?

BARRY HESITATES

What happened, Chantelle?

-We spilled drink on the computer by accident.

-Oh, my goodness!

But that's...that's my only copy!

Of my new book!

-My goodness, what am I going to do?

-I don't know.

Right, I think this has gone far enough. It's time to reveal all.

You have been Smarked for Sam and Mark's Big Friday Wind-Up!

CHEERING

I don't know what to do!

You know you said you liked my Hetty Feather books

and you wanted Emerald Star?

I have brought with me the very first real copy.

It wasn't in the computer at all.

And you will be the very, very first girl to read it!

-So, there we go, for you.

-Oh, gosh!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Fantastic. So...

Come on, Chantelle, what were you thinking when the computer exploded?

I saw the look on Jacqueline's face and I didn't know

whether it was fake or not.

Because the fire, it kind of... it looked... Oh!

Are you saying she's a bad actress, is that what you are saying?

-Oh, man! I can't believe it!

-What did you think of her drawings?

You can be honest, she's not here, or is she? She's not, honest.

-What did you think of her drawings?

-Terrible!

-They were pretty bad.

Well you did all right in the end,

because you did manage to get a signed copy of Jacqueline's book.

-Did you enjoy that?

-Yeah, it was great. Cried a little.

AUDIENCE: Aww!

-But did you enjoy yourself?

-Yes. It was great.

-Excellent.

You've been a fantastic sport. Everybody, give it up for Chantelle

and her mum, Selina, of course.

CHEERING

And a big thank you to Dame Jacqueline Wilson, thanks so much.

Legend. Stay where you are, because there's still loads to come,

including all of this.

'Still to come, there'll be more prizes in store,

'when we play the most frantic game on TV.

'There's music from Lawson

'and just who's lurking inside this truck, to give Sam and Mark

'a surprise?'

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the Finger Of Fun!

Oh, look at the bling! Nice bling finger.

-You going somewhere nice, are ya?

-He can't answer, he's a finger.

Oh, he did answer! Stop answering. You have a very important job to do.

You need to go and find us someone. Off you go.

CHEERING

BOTH: Who's it going to be?

It could be you. It's not you. It's not you.

CHEERING

It could be-e-e...

It's not you, not you.

It might be, no, it's not you.

Who's it was going to be?

-There we go.

-O-o-o-o-h!

I think the finger has found us a pair of sisters. What are your names?

-Tracey.

-I'm Janine.

Excellent. Well, you two had better get yourselves down here,

because it's time to play the Prize Surprise. Come down, girls.

So, girls, were either of you

-expecting that?

-BOTH: No.

-I didn't think so.

-I think it's safe to say you were surprised?

BOTH: Yes.

Now, we understand that you are fans of a certain group, who may

or may not be, in the studio tonight, is that right?

-BOTH: Yes! Do you like Lawson?

-Yes.

If you were that big a fan, you must be able to identify any

of their songs, mustn't you? I mean, especially, Tracey,

-you're the biggest fan?

-Yeah.

All right, so do you recognise this one, then?

GIRLS' OFF-KEY SINGING

-Sam, that didn't sound like Lawson to me?

-It didn't sound like Lawson.

Who was that? BOTH: Us!

It was you two and your little brother, Lewis, wasn't it?

Don't ask us how we got hold of that,

-we can get hold of anything, us.

-Anything.

-So who's your favourite member of Lawson?

-Ryan.

-Ryan.

-What about yourself?

-Andy.

-Andy!

-Ooohh!

What would you do if you met Ryan and Andy in person,

-that must be pretty amazing, wouldn't it?

-Yeah!

Well, now is your chance,

because we're giving you the opportunity to do just that

and also, here's the kicker, win loads of prizes.

Yes, so it's time to play, Lead Us To Lawson.

CHEERING

-Yeah.

-Sam, we've been very careless.

-Very careless.

-Somehow we managed to lose Lawson.

-It happens all the time. Seriously.

-You turn your head for five minutes, and they're off!

-See you later.

All we know is, that they're lurking in some rooms just outside

-the studio.

-We're going to give you 60 seconds

to find all four members.

For every member that you find, you win a prize. How does that sound?

-Great!

-Yeah, nice!

-60 seconds, it's not a lot of time, is it?

-No.

So, we'll give you the chance to add another 60 seconds,

that's a whole two minutes gang!

All you have to do is answer three questions,

and for every one you get right, we'll add an extra 20 seconds.

-Understood?

-Yes.

-Excellent.

-Right, here we go.

Can we have some tension lighting and music, please?

-That's pretty tense.

-That is tense.

-OK, best of luck.

Here's your first question.

There are four members in Lawson, but can you name them?

We don't want just the first name, we want surnames as well. Off you go.

-Ryan Fletcher.

-Correct.

-Andy Brown.

-Correct.

-Joel Peat.

-Correct.

-And the last one...

-Adam...

Come on, come on!

SAM WHISPERS A CLUE

THEY FALTER

He's not called Adam Armpit!

Close, though.

-What about the end bit of that?

-Pitt.

-Yeah!

-We'll give you that.

-It's Pitts.

Adam Armpit, he'll love that. Sorry, mate.

You've now got 80 seconds on the clock, that's not bad, girls.

OK, here's your next question.

We've already heard you singing a Lawson song, but now

we're going to play you a line from the song you sang,

Taking Over Me and what we want you to do is sing is the next line.

-Understood?

-Yes.

-OK, let's play it.

# Fix your broken heart I'll make it beat again

# I'll never let you down On me you can depend. #

See if you're right.

# I'll never let you down On me you can depend. #

CHEERING

-I love that.

-Right in the eyes!

Well done, girls. You've got 100 seconds to find all four members.

-Good.

-But there's still another 20 to play for. Your final question.

-Are you ready?

-Yes.

-That wasn't the question.

What's the combined age of all four members of Lawson?

Is it 88,

90 or 92? Think about it.

THEY CONFER

-What are you going for? 88, 90, 92,

-88.

-You're going for...

-88.

-All right.

I can reveal that it's 90!

Ohh! You were only a letter away!

So close. But, you've done really well. You got yourself 100 seconds.

-That's not bad at all, is it?

-Very good.

OK, girls, are you ready for this? Awesome.

OK, well, let's have 100 seconds on the clock in three, two, one...

Lead Us To Lawson.

BOYS SHOUT ENCOURAGEMENT

You've only got 100 seconds, girls.

You're doing well!

Not that way, not that way!

The chicken's told you to go back!

THEY SHOUT ENCOURAGEMENT

Here we go, what we got here?

Yes!

AUDIENCE CHEERING

That's one prize, one prize!

Come on, girls!

CHEERING

-That's two prizes!

-Keep going!

Come on, you can do this.

Who are these people with the arrows?

CHEERING

-You've got enough time.

-Go!

Come on, come on!

You've got one more member to find. Other way, other way. Down there!

SAM AND MARK SHOUT ENCOURAGEMENT

-Keep running.

-Who's that guy?

Come on, you can do it.

CHEERING

Concert tickets!

How amazing is that? Well done, girls.

You managed to find all four members of Lawson.

You've got yourself some prizes, even some concert tickets there.

-How are you feeling girls?

-Really excited.

-Nice one.

-And what's it like meeting your idols, Lawson?

-So happy!

Tracey, give him a hug, give him a hug!

APPLAUSE

-They've got to be the biggest concert tickets I've ever seen!

-Yeah!

Thank you for being such fantastic players.

We'll be hearing Lawson perform later on, but in the meantime,

you two, kick back, relax, have a chat with them!

Yeah, have a chat! Have a brew and a chat. Enjoy yourselves.

-They're loving it, loving it.

-You have seen us pulling all sorts

of stunts on our studio audience,

-but now it's our turn to get a surprise.

-I love surprises, me.

-You might not like this one so much, it's a bit unpleasant.

-Oh.

But don't worry, man, don't worry,

because it is now time to take a deep breath

and say those immortal words...

BOTH: Bring on the Truck Of Luck!

HORN BEEPS

EXHAUST BACKFIRES

OK, other than Chimpy, there is something inside this vehicle,

but Mark and I have no idea what,

but whatever it is, we just have to go with it, people.

All right, here we go. Mystery guest, please reveal yourself.

DRUM ROLL

-Hello.

-Hello.

-How are you?

-Good, thank you.

-What's that you're holding?

-A piping bag.

A piping bag! Ooh! Interesting!

Oh, you're joking.

-Oh, wow!

-That looks amazing.

Oh, wow! That's beautiful!

APPLAUSE

Sarah, is it? Hello, I'm Sam.

-I'm Mark.

-Hi.

-Lovely to meet you.

Wow, that looks very difficult but you made it look very easy.

-Yeah, that's amazing. This is our challenge?

-It is.

Your challenge is to decorate a cupcake bouquet,

but the interesting twist is, it will be rotating as you ice it.

-Oh, brilliant!

-This will be a disaster!

-It really, really will.

-We'd better go and get ready.

-We'd best, but while we do that,

take a look at what we've got up to with our hidden cameras

just before the show started.

Yes, we played a little prank on some members of our studio audience,

who were daft enough to get into our fake wind-up photo booth,

-you silly lot.

-You silly lot!

Yes, take one fake photo booth

and one rubber spider,

and this is what you get.

SHE SCREAMS

THEY SCREAM AND LAUGH

THEY SCREAM

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

-We got you good then, eh?

-We did.

We are back with lovely Sarah,

and it is now our turn to perform.

It is. So, Sarah, what have we actually got to do?

So your challenge is to decorate a cupcake bouquet each

while they're rotating.

-I'll be judging you.

-OK.

-So whoever I think does best will win.

-So how long how we got to do it?

-You've got 45 seconds.

-Oh! That's not long!

-We might as well have 45 hours!

So that is our challenge, but how do you lot think we're going to do?

Right, studio audience,

we're going to ask you to vote for who you think will be the best.

If you get it right, there is a prize in it for you.

Yes, you each have two cards - blue for me and pink for Mark.

So please make your decision...

BOTH: And raise your cards!

I think...

It's quite even.

Yeah, quite even.

All right! All right, you rabble!

-OK. Shall we do this, then?

-OK! No!

MARK SHRIEKS HYSTERICALLY

Don't bottle it! Don't bottle it!

-OK, shall we take our instruments?

-Are you ready?

Three, two, one, go.

CHEERING

Ah!

Wah!

Ah!

Stop moving! Aagh!

HORN BLOWS

-Wait!

-Job done!

Oh, man alive, that was difficult!

-No! No! No!

-What?

It's not the right colour scheme.

That's not my fault. Big bag, small bag, big bag, small bag!

OK, Sarah, it's up to you now

-to decide who is the winner, me or Mark.

-OK, well,

-there's some nice rose action going there.

-Thank you.

But I'm not too sure about this one.

-Hmm.

-Let's forget about that one.

Forget about that one, look at the good ones!

OK, so my winner is...

-Sam.

-Yeah!

CHEERING

-Yeah!

-Well done, mate.

Thank you very much.

Tell you what, that was a lot of fun.

I'm eating all of these after.

OK, so that is a win for me, which means everybody who voted for me

are also winners. Well done, guys!

You will all receive a no expense spared Big Friday Wind-Up toy!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

And please give it up for our special guest, Sarah, everyone.

-Thank you very much. That was brilliant.

-I really enjoyed that.

It was really good. There are still more surprises to come

for members of our studio audience, but before that, take a look

at what you can expect from this series of Big Friday Wind-Up.

Get the kettle on.

Well, sorry to interrupt Sam and Mark's Big Friday Wind-Up...

All right, cockers!

Sam's just being smart.

Hello.

Who's it going to be? Yeah!

CHEERING

He's back.

I love that finger.

How are you doing? You all right?

Stop asking him questions.

-I keep telling you, he's just a finger, man!

-He's real! He's real!

He's not real. OK, in just a moment,

the finger is going to find us

two families to take part in our final game, but who's going to be?

Whoever it is will have the chance to win loads of goodies,

including tonight's star prize, a games console!

Ooh!

So, finger,

-find us some families, will you?

-Go!

Oh...

# Who's it going to be?

# Who's going to be? Ah, yeah! #

-Oh, oh...

-Could be you!

It's not you! It's not you.

If you're a family, could be choosing you.

Oh, oh...

Oh, oh, oh...

Oh!

All right. The finger has made up its mind,

and our first family is the...

-Piperakis family.

-Yay!

-Whoo!

All right, but who will they be competing against? It's so tense.

Come on, finger. Off you go.

# Who's it going to be?

# Who's it going to be? Oh, yeah!

# Who's it going to be? #

-Oh!

-Oh...

Look at their faces!

Yes, it's the Waring family.

All right, guys?

Right, you lot, get yourselves down here

-because it's time to play Family Face-off.

-Come on down!

CHEERING

I reckon we should meet our two families properly. Over here,

-we've got lovely mum, Anita. How are you doing?

-Fine, thank you.

-Would you like to introduce the rest of your team?

-I would.

-This is Harriet, my youngest daughter.

-Hello.

Grace, my eldest daughter,

-and Ray, my husband.

-How are you doing?

You all right? Enjoying it so far? You look petrified!

-Absolutely.

-It's all right, cos you're on Team Mark. All right! Sam.

Over on my team, we've got Kat.

-Are you all right, Kat?

-Yeah.

Excellent. Introduce the rest of the gang for us.

This is my twin brother, Stelios,

-and over there is my mum.

-Hello, Mum.

-Hi, Sam!

-You all right?

-I'm fine, thank you, Sam.

-Good.

Team Mark, are we ready?

-Yes.

-I like it!

-Team Sam, are we ready?

-Yes!

In that case, what are we waiting for?

It's time for round one - the Underpants Of Chaos!

CHEERING

What on earth are you doing?

-I'm just putting out the vibe.

-I like it.

OK, this is the part of the show

where yes, Sam and I, we tend to put underpants over the top of our suits.

-But that's not all... I'll stop doing that.

-Yeah, please.

That's not all, because these underpants are...

BOTH: Electrified!

-You know what I'm going to say, don't you?

-I do.

We'd better try them out.

The powers that be, let's test, see if they're working.

PANTS CRACKLE

Oh-ho-ho!

Oh!

Yes, they are working good and proper! You all right?

-You proper jumped then.

-I wasn't expecting it.

OK, so here is how the game works.

This is Team Sam.

And this is Team Mark.

Each team will tell us an interesting fact about themselves.

And then the other team has to guess whether that fact is true or false

by pressing one of the buttons in front of them.

Now, if my team are right,

Mark will get the shock,

but if my team are wrong, then I get the shock.

OK, let's play. Team Sam, could we please have your fact?

I always pour brown sauce on my cornflakes.

Oh. So, Team Mark, do you think that fact is true or false?

You have a certain amount of time to deliberate, starting from now.

No idea!

THEY WHISPER

HORN BLOWS

Guys, before you press your button, what will you go for? True or false?

-False.

-False.

-OK, well,

don't forget, if you're right, I will get the shock

but if you're wrong, then Mark will get the shock.

OK, press your false bottom in three, two, one.

PANTS CRACKLE

Oh!

Ah-ha-ha!

Oh! That was a sharp one!

So it was false. OK, well done, guys, you get the point.

OK, now, it's over to Team Mark to tell us your fact. Off you go.

Come on, Anita.

I played international badminton for Wales.

You have time to deliberate, and it starts now. What do you think?

THEY WHISPER

Please get it right.

HORN BLOWS

Your time is up. What do you think?

-True.

-OK. Here we go.

Press the true button in three,

two, one, go.

PANTS CRACKLE

-Ah, no!

-Yay! It is true.

CHEERING

Interesting. So, Mum, you actually play badminton?

-I did, a long, long time ago.

-That's amazing! I love badminton.

It's my favourite sport! It's the only sport I can play.

-Do you want a game after the show?

-That'd be good.

-Good luck with that, Sam, she used to play for Wales.

-Yeah!

So that means that at the end of round one, the scores are one each.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Right, could not be closer, but now it's time for round two,

the round that everyone is talking about. Oh, yes,

it's Chimp In A Chair.

CHEERING

Now, as you can see, on our Wind-Up chair, we have Chimpy.

Now, he is rotating at 2,000 revolutions a second.

Well, maybe not that much, but it is quite fast.

Now, today is my annual laundry day,

so I need Chimpy to pick up those socks

I've carelessly scattered across the studio floor.

The question is, how many will he be able to grab in 20 seconds?

Families, could you write down your answers now, please?

-All right, so, what are you going for?

-You written down your answers?

Go on, write down your answers quick. We need to stop the chimp.

HORN BLOWS

-OK.

-We've got our answers.

Let's stop the chimp and see how many socks he can get.

Stop the chair! OK, here we go, Chimpy. Get ready. Off you go!

LAUGHTER

Pick up the socks!

Come on, Chimpy!

Mark needs his laundry.

Come on! Come on, Chimpy!

Time's up!

OK, Chimpy, come over here.

Come over here.

Here we go, here we go.

OK, come over here. Here we go.

Right, let's see how many we got.

We got one, two,

three, four, five, six,

seven, eight,

nine, ten, eleven and twelve!

Yay!

OK, Team Sam, what was your guess, please?

-Five.

-OK, you went for five.

Team Mark, what have you gone for?

-Six.

-Six, which is closer to twelve,

which means, Team Mark, you go through to the final round.

Two-one, you're the winners! Yeah!

All right, go up and get yourselves ready.

Congratulations, that was so close.

-Commiserations to Team Sam. Have you enjoyed yourselves?

-Yes.

Awesome. You have been incredible. Give it up for Team Sam, everybody!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Right then, here we go. Let's play Stuck On You.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Playing this game, we have Ray and Grace. How are you feeling, guys?

-Very excited.

-Good! That's what we like.

-Best of luck.

Right, here are the rules.

-The Wind-Up audience is armed with hundreds of balls.

-Woo!

Look at them. Now, you two have got to run around

and catch as many as you can in your sticky suits.

Now, at the end of the game, we'll count up the balls

and see what prizes you qualify for.

OK, more than 20 balls, which is represented by this yellow line here,

you'll win all these lovely board games.

-AUDIENCE:

-Ooh!

Ooh indeed. More than 40 balls,

which is represented by the blue line,

will get you all the board games

plus a day out at the cinema for all the family!

Very nice prize. Lot of good movies out at the minute.

True. True. It's not cheap either.

-It's not.

-And more than 60 balls,

which is represented by this red line here,

you will win the board games, the cinema tickets

and tonight's star prize, a games console!

Ooh!

-But wait!

-What?

That's not all, Mark, because there is one golden ball out there,

and if you manage to catch that,

you will get your hands on tonight's mystery prize!

-Ooh!

-This is too tense.

-Yeah.

Ray and Grace, are you ready?

-Ready.

-OK, there is just one rule.

You can't use your hands to pick up any of the balls.

Understood? Beautiful.

OK, in that case, audience,

let them have it! Go, guys, go!

Go on, here we go!

Here we go!

HORN BLOWS

Time's up! Time's up! Come over here, guys!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

OK, Ray, if you'd like to come over the side.

Grace, you come this side...

Wow, you guys have done well!

-You come this side, Grace.

-We could be here for some time.

-OK, here we go.

-You've done really well. Got two on your head.

-We'll put that one in, cos you dropped it.

-You'll be OK here.

Well, you've got the board games. That's good, that's good.

CHEERING

They've done well here. Look at this!

You've got the cinema tickets!

CHEERING

Oh, we've got one here.

Nearly there, nearly there!

BOTH: Yay!

-Well done, guys!

-You can take them home with you!

As you can see,

you've got all the prizes! Well done!

Well done, guys!

APPLAUSE

Guys, have you enjoyed yourselves?

-Yeah.

-Brilliant.

-Nice one.

Well, it is almost time to wind up the show,

but not before we've said thank you to everyone we've surprised tonight.

-And of course, a big thank you to Sarah.

-Yes.

-Our cake icing expert.

-She was very good. I won it! I won it!

-All right.

We will see you next time, but before we go, playing as out,

-it's the fantastic Lawson. Take it away, lads.

-Whoo!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

GLASS BREAKS

MUSIC: "Standing In The Dark" by Lawson

CROWD CLAP ALONG

# Sitting here wide awake

# Thinking about when I last saw you

# I know you're not far away

# Close my eyes and I can see you

# Lying here next to me

# I see nothing but a smile

# Oh, yeah

# Got to leave right away

# Counting cracks along the pavement

# To see you face to face

# Thinking about the conversation

# I know I'm not one to change

# Never wanted nothing more

# But as I walk up to your door

# Yeah!

# I'm standing in the dark

# She's dancing on the table

# I'm looking through the glass

# She's someone else's angel

# It may sound stupid that I'm wanting you back

# But I'm wanting you back, girl

# And now I'm standing in the dark, dark

# Oh, dark, dark

# All I want to do is hide

# But I can't stop myself from staring

# Wishing his hands were mine

# I can't stop myself from caring

# And as he turns down the lights

# I'm feeling paralysed

CROWD CHEERS

# And as he looks into her eyes

# Oh-oh, yeah, all right

# I'm standing in the dark

# She's dancing on the table

# I'm looking through the glass

# She's someone else's angel

# It may sound stupid that I'm wanting you back

# But I'm wanting you back, girl

# And now I'm standing in the dark, dark

# Oh, dark, dark

# Oh, dark, dark

# Oh, dark, dark, yeah!

# I'm standing in the dark

# I'm standing in the dark

# I'm standing in the dark

# She's dancing on the table

# I'm looking through the glass

# She's someone else's angel

# It may sound stupid that I'm wanting you back

# But I'm wanting you back, girl

# And now I'm standing in the dark, dark

# Oh, dark, dark

# Oh, dark, dark

# She's someone else's angel

# She's someone else's angel. #

CHEERING

Thank you!