Episode 5 Sam & Mark's Big Wind-Up

# Wind me up, put me down Start me up and watch me go

# It's easy once you know how it's done

# You can't stop now it's already begun. #

Ladies and gentlemen!

Give it up for Ant and Dec... Sorry, wrong show.

I mean, give it up for Sam and Mark!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

-Haaa!

-Come with me! Come with me!

All these people! All these people! A-ha!

SHOUTING AND CHEERING

It's going to be a good one!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Yeah! Whoo!

-Welcome to the weekend!

-Yes!

Everybody in the Wind Up audience, are you ready for the weekend?

AUDIENCE CHEERS

This flight is ready to take off and I have to warn you,

we may be experiencing some turbulence.

LAUGHTER

Nice. We have squeezed shedloads of surprises

and hidden-camera pranks into today's show

for you lot at home and you lot in the Wind Up studio.

We have, yes.

For example,

one member of this studio audience is in for the surprise of their life

when they discover there's a celebrity in their bed.

And on today's show, we have got our biggest hidden-camera hit ever.

Let me tell you something, we have been very naughty boys.

GLASS SHATTERS

AUDIENCE WHOOPS

But right now, enough of the old chit-chat,

let's fire up the engines, it's time for take-off.

Bring on the Finger!

MUSIC

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the Finger of Fun.

Finger, we need you to select someone that loves having some fun.

Finger of Fun, find us someone, will you? Go!

Who's it going to be?

Who is it going to be? Not you, sir.

Not you. # Who is it going to be?

# Who's it going to be? # Not you.

# Who is it going to be? # Might be you.

# Who is it going to be? Ow! #

The Finger is on a mission! Who's it going to be, my friend?

BOTH: Oo-oh!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Right!

OK. The Finger has spoken. What's your name?

Sydney.

Sydney. Well, in that case, get yourself down here.

It's time to have fun.

It's time for the Prize Surprise!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Sydney, great to have you here.

-Are you having a good time so far?

-Yes.

Brilliant. Things are about to get a whole lot better for you.

We've got a surprise in store for you, but don't worry,

it is a good surprise, you're going to really enjoy it.

Sydney, we know loads of stuff about you.

We know that you like dressing up, don't you?

Yes.

Have a look at this picture.

LAUGHTER

Lovely hair there, lovely hair.

We also know that these aren't your real ears.

LAUGHTER

We also know you're a fan of Stacey Solomon.

-Are you excited to see her on the show?

-Yes!

We also know, Sydney,

that you have a pink bedroom that you share with your sister.

-What's your little sister called?

-Lexi.

-Hello, Lexi.

-How're you doing?

In fact, Sydney, we know every little detail about your bedroom.

In fact, we think your bedroom is something special,

so special that we decided we'd like to see it for ourselves.

Ladies and gentlemen, please give it up for Sydney's bedroom!

APPLAUSE

Sydney, Sydney, can we confirm this is your bedroom?

Yes.

BOTH: Whoa! Who's that under the covers?

BOTH: It's Stacy Solomon!

Come over here, Stacy. CHEERING

-Stacey, meet Sydney.

-Hello!

-Hello, Sydney.

-Hello, how're you doing?

-Are you all right?

-Give me some love.

Stace, what do you think of Sydney's bedroom?

Nice room, it looks a little bit like mine.

Now, Sydney, I know what you're thinking,

"Why was Stacey Solomon in my bedroom?"

Allow me to explain.

We have hidden five of your possessions in your bedroom.

It's your job to find those possessions.

Before you do, you're going to answer Wind Up riddles. You up for that?

-Yes.

-I hope you're good at riddles.

For every possession that Stacey finds,

she will win Sydney a prize from the Wind Up prize stash.

-Stacey, are you ready for the challenge?

-I'm ready.

Here we go with your first riddle.

You can play this like a pop star,

it's a musical instrument, your pink...

BOTH: Guitar.

Guitar! Go!

KLAXON

Go on, Stacey. Have a good rummage!

-Woo-hoo!

-KLAXON

-Yey! Straight away!

-We didn't hide that very well!

This is your second riddle, Stacey.

You'll find him in Australia or even a zoo,

he's your furry friend, your toy...

Kangaroo? Kangaroo!

-Go for it!

-KLAXON

Oh, wow! KLAXON

Whoo-hoo!

OK, riddle number three, here we go.

You wear this on your head and not on your lap,

it's got New York on the front, it's your baseball...

-Cap.

-Find it, Stacey! KLAXON

Go! Go! Go!

Come on. She's having trouble, she's having trouble.

Come on, Stacey!

Yay! She's found it! Yay! Well done, that's three.

OK. This one's to Sydney.

They cover your eyes as the sun passes,

they keep out of the light, it's your sun...

Glasses.

Yes!

Come on!

CHEERING

Come on. Harder than that. You can rummage, you can rummage!

-Mess it up a bit.

-They won't mind.

Ha-ha!

So tidy! Are you going to run out of time? Come on, Stacey!

-Come on, Stacey.

-Come on!

-Go and help her.

-Go on, Sydney.

-Go and help her!

-Go and help, go on!

Go on! Get in there! You can find it! Come on!

KLAXON

Time! Time on that one. AUDIENCE: Aw!

You didn't get that one. Don't worry.

-Sorry, Sydney.

-Sydney, help Stacey. This is the final one.

He lives in the jungle, I think he's quite funky,

he munches bananas, it's your toy...

-Monkey!

-Yes!

I've seen him! I've seen him!

Oh, wow! CHEERING

KLAXON

Come on out, guys. Come back over here.

Stand right here, OK. You were very good at that! Very good at that!

Didn't get the sunglasses.

You found four of the items, which means you've won Sydney

four prizes from the Wind Up prize list!

CHEERING

Right now, it's time for the part of the show

where we wind things up to a whole new level

and give someone what we like to call a right good smarking.

As hidden camera pranks go, this one was pretty tasty.

If you're a fan of all things CBBC,

I'd advise you to switch your mobile to divert

and pay attention, like, about now.

To make this wind up... Lovely sweets!

To make this wind up work,

we needed to find a group of mates who were fans of CBBC,

up for anything and just basically big show-offs.

As luck would have it, we knew just the people.

'Meet Harry, Riley and Matty.

'They appeared on another of our hit shows, TMI Friday. We loved them.

HOWLING

'They were fun, they were up for a laugh and, as it turned out,

'Matty had another interesting quality.'

You're quite gullible. We're about to find out how gullible you are.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Oh, yeah, that was the other thing.

We were looking for mates who were a bit gullible.

Give it up for Matty, Harry and Riley!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

-All right, lads? How're you doing?

-Good.

-Nice to see you again.

-OK, lads.

Like all good stories, let's start at the beginning, shall we?

Six months ago, we got in touch with your parents

and came up with a... What's the word?

Erm, a lie! That's it!

A big fat lie about you winning an access-all-areas tour of the CBBC

and BBC Television Centre.

After weeks of planning, we were ready for action.

So what were you expecting

when you turned up at Television Centre?

Just to see the sets of different shows and that's it, really.

-A tour.

-Yeah, a tour.

That's a fair comment, I suppose.

Did the access-all-areas tour turn out as you expected?

Not really.

Funny, that.

I think we should take a look and see how your day began.

-Riley, you know what to say.

-Run VT!

'A lovely day at BBC Television Centre.

'Perfect conditions for a wind-up.

'Here come Matty, Harry and Riley, right on cue.

'They're taken to reception to meet our actor,

'Barry, who is going to be their BBC tour guide for the day.'

Hiya. Morning, morning. How are you?

Are you our guests today, are you?

-What's your name?

-Harry.

-Hello.

-Matty.

-Matty. Come here, mate.

-Are you on the phone?

-Sorry, just people wishing me luck today.

-Why? What are you going to do?

-I don't know.

'Riley's got no idea what's in store for him.

'That's just how we like it.

'Barry's kitted the boys out in access-all-areas jackets

'that contain microphones so we can hear everything they say.'

The deal is this. I'll try and get you to see as many areas as possible.

You've got access as long as you're wearing your jackets.

Who do you like? What children's presenters do you like?

-Sam and Mark.

-Sam and Mark, obviously.

-Who?

-'Thanks, Barry!

'Let's get this wind up started.

'First stop of our made-up tour, a BBC sound recording studio.

'Instead of letting them look around, we told them

'that actors hired to record the voices

'for a BBC advert have failed to turn up.

'So we need the lads to step in as last-minute replacements.

'First up, a levels check.'

Can you just do a chicken, then I can set your level.

-What?

-Give me a chicken sound so I can set your level.

CLUCKING

Let me tell you exactly what's going on, OK?

Here at the BBC we're putting together a promotional film

and we're going to take different accents

and put them together to advertise CBBC.

I'm going to ask each of you, one by one, to read in your local accent.

Three, two, one.

CBBC is the channel for me, it makes me want to go, ee-hee!

-Excellent.

-CBBC is the channel for me, it makes me want to go, ee-hee!

Brilliant. Go for it, Harry.

-HIGH VOICE:

-CBBC is the channel for me,

it makes me want to go, ee-hee!

Excellent. We liked it.

Now lets do some of these accents that we talked about. Bristol.

CBBC is the channel for me.

-Jamaican.

-CBBC is da channel fo' me... Oh, that's rubbish.

-Eastern European.

-CBBC is the trrannel for me.

-Scottish.

-It makes me wanta goo...

'Those are some pretty shocking accents.

'Let's get them to freestyle and see what they come up with.'

CBBC is the channel for me!

-HE GROWLS:

-CBBC...

IN STRANGE ACCENT: CBBC is the channel for me,

it makes me want to go, "Uh-he-he".

Did you hear?

HE LAUGHS

-OPERATIC SINGING:

-# CBBC... #

-Let's make that a choir. ALL:

-# It makes me want to go

# Eee-hee... #

Why don't we become three different aliens?

IN STRANGE VOICES: CBBC is the channel for me

and makes me want to go...

# Ee-hee... #

Give yourselves a big round of applause.

I've got so many different accents, that will sound absolutely brilliant.

Come on, let's have some lunch.

That was fun, thank you.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Oh, wow!

I've got to say, Harry,

-you were responsible for some pretty shocking accents, there!

-I was crying...

-I know!

You put your hands right there like that, as soon as that came up.

Riley, please give us another blast of your Bristol accent.

-Please, it's amazing.

-Well, basically, the other day, yeah...

-That's really good!

..this man came round my house and stole my socks, so I went round his and he stole my turnips.

LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

That's good! You didn't sound like that THEN!

So, let's talk about Barry, our wind-up actor.

-Was he a believable tour guide?

-ALL: Yeah.

-He was really good, wasn't he? And at this point,

were you suspicious at all, Matty?

Not really, but I saw a little camera on the computer in the room -

I thought that was a bit dodgy, but Barry told us that

if the light wasn't on, then it wasn't working, so...

-Well done, Barry!

-All right, Columbo!

Next up on the tour was a trip to the CBBC office,

and we set our good friend Iain two challenges.

Firstly, to get you to say nice things about him

in a CBBC questionnaire...

Secondly, to make you believe he was genuinely ill. Let's see how he got on. Harry, say the magic words.

-Run VT!

-Yeah!

-Nice to meet you, guys. How's it going?

-Not bad.

Are you having a good day?

-Yeah.

-What's that?

-A questionnaire.

-What questionnaire?

Iain, can you look after them for a bit?

-Cool, man.

-I'm just going to check...

We're access all areas. We've been on CBBC before.

-These are...

-We're going round different studios and marking the presenters...

-Really?

-Yeah.

So, no pressure!

I'm probably one of the best ones!

-We won't tell the others you said that.

-Cool, wicked.

-So, what are you going to put down?

-No idea.

Ask me some questions and I'll give you some answers.

-It says, "Are you a fan of this programme?

-Yes.

-Programme in three words.

"Best thing ever"?

-"His jokes are quality".

-I'm writing, "His jokes are awesome".

"Awesome" - that's better than "quality", isn't it?

-"Epic".

-Even better, yeah, "epic".

"The greatest man in the whole of the world".

I'll take that. These are fine.

-"Mark the presenter out of ten."

-Mark me out of ten?

-Yeah.

-20.

-20, put that. What are you putting for everyone else?

-Eight, but don't tell anyone.

-Eight. Then I'd get ten, wouldn't I?

-Yeah.

-That's cool.

As long as I get the highest.

'Iain's persuaded them to give him top marks for his presenting skills,

'but can he convince them he's ill?'

HE BURPS

Watch out, watch out, he's...

Do you want to sit there, maybe...?

HE BURPS Sorry, guys, I'll be back.

Back in two seconds, guys, I'm... HE RETCHES

..I'm really sorry, I'll...

'Iain's left his mic on, so the lads can hear everything.

'We're ready with a bucket of beans to help him seal the deal.'

LOUD VOMITING SOUNDS

Well, this is awkward...!

LOUD VOMITING SOUNDS

Do you know, he's still got his mic on!

VOMITING CONTINUES

Here comes Barry to find out what's going on.

Where is he?

-I think he's being sick.

-He went out.

Hey? He's left the room? Is he being sick? He's left his microphone on!

This better not be on TV.

-What's happening? Oh, my...

-All right, mate? I've just...

-Is that last night's dinner?! Looks like something out of Doctor Who!

-THEY LAUGH

Not feeling great, mate.

'Iain's clearly too sick to continue, but CBBC

'is about to go live again, so it's up to the boys to step in and save the day.'

-Do you all want to do it?

-Yeah!

-Yeah!

Right, you sort it out...

I'll say that.

Decide who's going to do what.

Harry, you start. Remember, the camera's here...

Is this actually genuine?

There's no way Iain will make it back.

He really is ill. Are you all right to do this, seriously?

-Yeah.

-Is this going on air?

-Yeah...

-'Just 15 seconds away

'from what they think will be their live TV debut, they have no idea it's all a wind-up.'

Clean your glasses, I can see smudges.

-I haven't got any things!

-It doesn't matter, look to the camera,

ten seconds... Clean your teeth, Harry!

Five, four, three,

two...

Good morning, CBBC viewers, you LUCKY people -

not only have you tuned in to the best channel ever, but - drum roll, please...

It's Iain Stirling day!

Yeah!

Yes, it's time to appreciate the barnet,

the cheeky grin, and the laugh-out-loud times.

CANNED LAUGHTER

-I thank you, I thank you...

-But continuing the LOLs,

here's Barney's Latin America - run that one!

Excellent, clear. YES!

Very, very good! You're stars!

You're stars of the stage and the screen!

You saved the day!

Right, I'll see if Iain's all right.

Do whatever you want.

I don't think that was genuine. I think that was part of the tour.

'These guys are beginning to suspect a wind-up,

'so let's send in the studio producer and director to convince them it's the real deal.'

Was that actually serious?

It was, yeah. You did really well.

-Seriously?

-You guys were really good.

I want to do it again. I love it!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

You guys are naturals in the CBBC office!

Now, that must have been pretty nerve-wracking.

How did you feel when Barry told you you were going to go live to the nation and stand in for Iain?

Didn't know what to do, really, we were told we only had 20 seconds until we had to go live,

so, we didn't really have a choice.

-You didn't! You were great, though.

-We know who to come to in a crisis!

-Did you believe Iain was genuinely ill?

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

-Did you?

-Good performance, wasn't it?

So, after all that drama in the CBBC office, it was time to get some fresh air.

It was also time to really wind things up. Oh, yes - your day was about to get

-a little bit more interesting. Matty, do the honours.

-Run VT!

After all the excitement over the weekend,

Royal Wedding fever is hitting the high street.

Hold on...

Sorry, I'm so sorry.

-These are the backstage area guests.

-How are you, mate?

-This is Harry...

-How you doing?

-This is Matty, and this is Riley.

I should stand up for you, but I won't.

No, no, sit down - the Blue Peter bench!

Welcome to the Blue Peter garden for a Newsround summer special.

This is a bit bonkers, but we're taking advantage of the weather.

Do you guys want to have a look around?

Could we let them have a go of the camera for a bit?

-Film this bit of the...

-Have a play with some of our equipment.

'So, the lads take the chance to play with the Newsround camera and film a piece with Ore.

'Next up, the mixing desk, which they're told they can control for the next live bulletin.

'But first, some instructions from the sound man.'

-Who wants to do it?

-Me, please.

-OK. Take it in turns.

That's Ore's mic there,

I'm listening on my headphones. If I give you that signal,

push it up a little bit. If I give you that signal... put it down a little bit.

-Yeah?

-Yeah.

-Just keep an eye on me.

'Sounds simple enough -

'adjust the levels when the sound man gives you the signal. What could possibly go wrong?!'

All right, guys? Don't muck it up.

'So, Harry thinks he's genuinely controlling the sound on a live episode of Newsround,

'but, what he doesn't know, is that we've hidden a surprise in the mixing desk.'

Hi, guys, welcome to the Blue Peter garden for a Newsround summer special.

What a fantastic day to bring you the news live. I'm here with everything you need to know.

'Keep your eye on the sound man, Harry -

'follow his every instruction.'

..to hit the high street.

Finally, giant water spouts have been spotted...

'Careful with that fader, Harry - I wouldn't push it TOO far!'

..more for you later on...

EXPLOSION

..later on this afternoon.

Look what you've done to the Blue Peter garden!

'Stop there!'

The sound machine...

it's wrecked the Blue Peter greenhouse!

'Let's see that again. Harry genuinely thinks he's responsible

'for smashing the Blue Peter greenhouse!'

-Harry!

-It wasn't me, it was him!

-Yes, it was, it was you.

What have you done?!

APPLAUSE

First of all, can I just say, Riley, I can't believe how quick

you were to blame Harry there!

Oh, what have you done there, mate?! What you done?

Now, Harry, you cut it as a CBBC presenter but as a sound man

you were awful, what was going on there when that desk blew up?

I've quickly got to blame someone else!

THEY LAUGH

Right there with you, brother. And did you think you were going

-to get in big trouble for smashing the Blue Peter greenhouse?

-Yes.

-Riley saying yeah!

-Now, at this point

were any of you starting to get suspicious?

A little bit cos loads had gone wrong already and there was no way

another thing wouldn't go wrong.

Yeah, you were having a bad day!

Well, we'd taken things this far so we thought, what the heck,

let's wide it up to the max, and seeing as he grassed up Harry,

it seemed only fair that it was Riley's turn to have a shock.

Here's a special Newsround bulletin.

After a bit of DIY from the sound man it looks like things are fixed

in time for the next live Newsround bulletin

and in this one we've got a little surprise in store for Riley.

Hi, guys, welcome to the Blue Peter garden for a Newsround

summer special, we'll hopefully go on to our stories later

this afternoon but we're just hearing now that some animals are

on the loose in Oxford, they've escaped from a travelling circus,

I think we can give you some footage that's just come in from

an amateur cameraman who's managed to capture these incredible scenes.

Yep, Sam and I dressed up like gorillas and paid a secret visit

to Riley's home in Oxford.

That's my house.

Is it? How do you know?

That's my room!

That's throwing out all my stuff!

People are being advised to stay indoors,

we'll hopefully bring you more on the story

and get to some of our other stories as they develop.

That's my house!

That is all from me, we'll see you later.

It looks like he totally believes

-our fake gorillas on the loose newsflash.

-So, cue the stars

of the show all the way from Riley's house in Oxford - us!

THEY GIGGLE

-Hello.

-Ahhh!

-How are you doing?

-You've been to my house!

Can I just say, lads,

if you look up there, we've been filming you all day

and you have just been wound up on our brand-new show.

Yeah!

Smarked, if you will.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Oh, poor old Riley!

What did you think when your house was featured on Newsround?

I thought it must be a prank cos there's not even

any gorillas in Oxford so I don't know how they got to my house.

What did you think when we rocked up dressed as two monkeys?

I don't know, I knew something wasn't right,

but I still didn't think it was a prank!

News just in - you guys got well and truly smarked

but you were brilliant sports.

Ladies and gentlemen, please give a huge round of applause

for Matty, Harry and Riley.

Remember, this is the show with a surprise around every corner.

No-one is safe, especially if you're guilty of a terrible crime

like embarrassing your kids.

Ngh! I've got to do this! I've got to do this! Cheers, mate. Yeah. Cheers.

Whoo! OK. So, anybody here embarrass their kids?

Elliot, Elliot.

-All right, mate? How're you doing?

-I'm good, you?

-Not bad, mate.

I've been hearing on holiday your dad got up on stage and did a dance.

Is that true? That must have been pretty embarrassing.

Yeah.

What makes it double more embarrassing, Elliot?

He had to dress up as a cheerleader.

Yeah. THAT is embarrassing!

Guess what? We've got a photo of your dad. Look!

LAUGHTER Looking great!

He's looking good there, isn't he, mate? He's looking good.

-Where is your dad today, Elliot?

-He's refereeing at the moment.

-Is he a referee, is he?

-Well, yeah.

-OK, OK. Hmm. Hmm.

Can you just read that? That camera there, it's just coming.

Elliot, yeah. What does it say?

My dad has told me a little fib

because he is right here in the Wind Up studio.

Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for my dad.

Yes, that's right!

Give it up for Elliot's dad!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

# Oh, Mickey, what a pity you don't understand

# You took me by the heart when you took me by the hand

# Oh, Mickey, you're so pretty, can't you understand

# It's guys like you, Mickey What you do Mickey, do Mickey

# Don't break my heart, Mickey

# Oh, Mickey, you're so fine, you're so fine, you blow my mind

# Hey, Mickey! #

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

OK, now to play us out, it's Rizzle Kicks with Youngster. Bye!

I wanna see some good, clean dancing.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

# I can remember that when I was a little youth

# I wanted to fly around the world making a new life

# I never thought today I'd be where I am now

# Yo, wanted to be a fireman Then I lost the desire, man

# The second I got old enough To buy myself that type of can

-# Yeah

-I was a smart little kid That side's departed me since

# These days you can catch me sittin' on a bench in the park

# With a mouthful of chips

# Back when I was younger

# I wanted to be everything on the planet

# On the, on the, on the planet

# Now that I am older It seems the ambition has vanished

# Yeah, when I was a youngster When I was a

-# When I was a youngster, youngster When I was a youngster

-Yeah

# And now that I'm older

# I wish I coulda been everything that I wanted

# I'm on it I think that if I think back, back

# To the days When I thought I didn't think that

# Nothing that I thought could not be possible

# Try and figure that out Back when I didn't know how

# To settle for a desk job Bring in those pounds

# I wanted to live in those clouds

# These days I deliver those sounds

# I always thought of myself as a simple dreamer

# Never tried too hard But believed it

-# Yeah!

-Now all of a sudden It's gone my way

-Yeah, yeah, yeah

# Back when I was younger

# I wanted to be everything on the planet

# On the, on the, on the planet

# Now that I am older It seems the ambition has vanished

# Yeah, when I was a youngster When I was a... #