A Hole Lot of Mess Swashbuckle

# A band of naughty pirates Took some jewels from me

# I hid on board their pirate ship And sailed off out to sea

# But they weren't watching where they went

# And shipwrecked on the sand

# I want to win my treasure back Will you give me a hand?

-ALL:

-# Hey-ho, Swashbucklers, go Take on the pirates, yo-ho-ho!

-# Hey-ho, Swashbucklers, go Take on the pirates, go, go, go!

-#

Will you help me win my treasure back?

-Yeah!

-Shall I make the pirates walk the plank?

-Yeah!

Well, let's hear you, then, me hearties!

# Hey-ho, Swashbucklers, go Take on the pirates, yo-ho-ho!

# Hey-ho, Swashbucklers, go Take on the pirates, go, go, go! #

Swashbuckle cheer!

-AUDIENCE:

-Arrr-harrr!

Yeah!

AUDIENCE CHEERS

Woohoo!

Ahoy there, me hearties, and welcome to Swashbuckle!

-AUDIENCE:

-Arrr-harrr!

I'm Gem, and it's great to have you all aboard.

-AUDIENCE:

-Arrr-harrr!

Are you already for a rip-roaring pirate adventure?

-AUDIENCE:

-Arrr-harrr!

Me, too. Now, Captain Sinker is away on her holidays.

I wonder what she's up to?

Oh. Hee-hee!

Ah. Oh!

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

Ah. Oh!

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

Well, Captain Sinker may be busy relaxing on holiday,

but there's no time to relax around here.

She's left very strict Captain Captain guarding my jewels.

In fact, have you seen her anywhere?

AUDIENCE: There!

Oh, there she is.

Yes, yes! Nothing to see here.

Moving on!

Er, Captain Captain, are you hiding something?

What? No!

Cook! Line!

BOTH: Yes,

Captain Chief Admiral Pirate Tremendous And Incredibly Nasty...

THEY GASP FOR AIR ..The Third.

I've told you, call me Captain Captain for short.

BOTH: Yes, Captain Captain For Short.

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

Psst, Captain. You've got a hole in your trousers.

Yes, yes, yes, I know.

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

I knew you were hiding something.

There's a rat on this ship, and it's eating holes in everything.

Including my jacket and trousers!

It must be a pi-rat.

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

I don't get it.

RAT SQUEAKS

There it is again. Munching away.

Get that rat off my ship!

Yes, Captain Captain!

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

While Cook and Line find that rat,

it's time for me to find my jewels.

So, Squawk, let's meet today's Swashbucklers.

Playing today, we've got...

Natalie!

AUDIENCE CHEERS

Natalie is seven and wants to be a fashion designer when she's older.

Her Swashbuckle name

is Dolphin Natalie!

Next, it's Milo.

AUDIENCE CHEERS

Milo is six and likes to dance when he's cleaning.

His Swashbuckle name

is Captain Milo!

Meet Harriet.

AUDIENCE CHEERS

Harriet is seven years old

and loves baking.

Her Swashbuckle name

is Horrid Harriet.

Finally, it's Marcus.

AUDIENCE CHEERS

Marcus is also seven

and loves technology.

Let's hope his team can programme a win today.

His Swashbuckle name

is Shipmate Marcus!

AUDIENCE CHEERS

Welcome aboard to my new team of fantastic Swashbucklers,

here to help me win back my jewels from Captain Captain.

But I need to make sure you're all ready for the challenge,

so let's do the Swashbuckle Salute!

Let me see you all marching.

Put your hands on your hearts.

Here we go.

-Eye patch. ALL:

-Eye patch.

-Pirate hat. ALL:

-Pirate hat.

-Swashbuckle cheer! ALL:

-Arrr-harrr!

Right, we're ready. Oh, have a look down here.

This is our treasure chest.

So, when you win my jewels back,

we'll pop them in here to keep them safe from very pesky pirates.

Gem, if you win any jewels today, I will eat my hat.

SQUEAKING

Ah! That's if that pesky rat doesn't eat a hole in it first.

Oh! Where is it?

Ha-ha! Be careful what you say, Captain Captain.

Come on, we're ready to start today's games.

Squawk, what's the first one?

The first game is...

The aim of the game is to make the treasure chest jigsaw.

All you have to do is walk along the plank to collect the jigsaw pieces.

But be careful.

Cook and Line will stop you from crossing,

and hide the pieces, too.

Good luck, Swashbucklers.

AUDIENCE CHEERS

Thank you, Squawk. Here's the picture of our treasure chest.

There are eight pieces altogether we have to collect,

but don't tell the pirates I sneaked two in there to start you off

so you only have to find six the other side of the plank over there

where Cook is swinging them from side to side.

Now, do look out for Line as well, he may try to make you fall in.

And if you do... AUDIENCE LAUGHS

..you have to go back to the side that you were coming from.

You have as long as it takes for the octopus to reach out

across the screen and close the treasure chest.

-Harriet and Marcus, will you go first for me?

-Yes.

-Brilliant. Are we ready to play? ALL:

-Arrr-harrr!

Then Swashbucklers away!

BELL RINGS

Let's cheer them on, everyone, come on.

Give them some encouragement.

-CHANTING:

-Marcus! Marcus!

Well done, Marcus.

Harriet! Harriet!

That's it, Harriet.

Well done, Marcus, bring that first piece back.

Well dodged, Harriet.

Don't in, don't fall...

Oh, no.

Back to the other side, Marcus!

What, no, wait...

Cook's fallen over!

Well done, Marcus.

OK, Milo, off you go.

And then when Harriet gets back,

Natalie, it's your turn.

Well done for stopping that big sack there, Milo.

Oh, clever thinking!

Brilliant, Swashbucklers.

Well done. Off you go, Natalie.

That's it. Have a look for those pieces, where do they go?

That's the first two over.

We're halfway now, Swashbucklers,

we've got plenty of time to get the other four pieces back!

Oh, you went in, back you go!

Oh, never mind, Milo. Make your way back this way.

Cook! Hide a piece.

Shh.

Well done. Good work. That's it.

Oh, well recovered, Milo.

Right, so where do these go now?

We've got four pieces here, we need two more.

Come on, we need the last two pieces back,

we're running out of time!

Ten. Nine. Eight.

-ALL:

-Seven. Six. Five.

-Come on!

Four. Three. Two.

Get into position!

BELL RINGS

Oh, we just ran out of time.

Well tried, Swashbucklers.

Squawk, you got the bird's eye view. Over to you.

I saw it all from up here.

There was skilful dodging from Marcus.

But he slipped in, trying to squeeze past Harriet.

Clever Milo used the sack to get across,

but then Line used it to send him in.

The Swashbucklers did a great job,

but sorry, Gem, it's a lose!

Oh, me hearties, that was so close! But don't worry, there's still time

to win that jewel back a little bit later, OK?

A-hem! Ha-ha! I think I shall just keep this jewel

safely here in my captain's purse.

CLANG

Oh! That pesky rat has eaten a hole in it!

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

Well, there's still time for us to win that jewel back

a little bit later, Captain.

And then one of you naughty pirates will have to walk the plank

into the smelly ship's mess. Ew!

Ew!

Ugh! Line, can you think of anything

that smells worse than the ship's mess?

Ho-ho. The only thing that smells worse than that is...

Captain's smelly socks!

Oh, stop sleeping on the job, Line.

And get that rat off my ship!

Look, cook. It's even eaten holes in my socks!

Oh, pull yourself together! My socks don't smell.

Moving on.

Ew. The ships mess is the best place for THOSE smelly socks.

Right, you naughty pirates. We want to play another game!

Squawk, what's next?

The second game is...

Squawk! The aim of this game is to make a picture

that matches what the pirate is wearing.

All you have to do is run through the giant barrel, find

the dressing up bits, and bring them back to make your picture.

But be careful. Cook or Line will be trying to make you tumble.

AUDIENCE CHEERS

Go for it, Swashbucklers.

Thank you, Squawk.

And here is Cook wearing the items you have to collect.

We're looking for a black bandanna with orange pigtails,

pineapple sunglasses,

a blonde beard,

an anchor earring,

a white and yellow T-shirt,

and a parrot.

-Squawk. Hi, Gem.

-Hello, parrot.

And you'll find them all through the Tumbly Barrel,

over there in those crates.

But look out for Line, who's tumbling that barrel,

which may make you fall.

OK, Natalie, will you go first for me?

Brilliant. Are we ready to play?

-ALL:

-Arrr-harrr!

Then, Swashbucklers away!

BELL RINGS

Off you go. That's it, all the way through.

Let's cheer them on, everyone!

AUDIENCE CHEERS

Well done, Natalie.

What have we found?

Oh, we've got the anchor earring, brilliant.

So, Milo, you're going to go next.

We can get the black hat and with the orange pigtails

or the pineapple glasses, off you go.

Well done, my hearties.

Oh, good recovery.

So we're looking for... Yes! The parrot. Perfect.

They found that one quickly!

Well done. Two pieces over.

OK, how are we doing?

Uh-oh.

Look out for Cook.

He's putting some fish in the tumbly barrel. Oh, no.

Keep going, Marcus.

Ready, Harriet?

Well done.

Great, you got the glasses over.

Three over, three more to get.

Well done. OK, that it. Brilliant!

We're looking for the hat with the orange pigtails,

and we're also looking for the yellow beard, OK?

Come on, Natalie, you're nearly there. Harriet, keep going.

Oh, don't leave the T-shirt behind, we need that.

Off you go, Natalie. Well done!

Chuck in some fish, Cook.

We need a yellow beard, and a black bandanna with pigtails, that's it.

So, we have to get the yellow beard now.

You're doing really well. Quick as you can! Off you go, Milo.

Well done! Up onto the boards, that's it, can you reach?

Good girl.

Yes! You got it.

Oh, come on. You're nearly there. That's it.

Up on the board, on the board.

Yes! Ha-ha!

Well done, me hearties. You've done it.

Celebratory hug happening down here, brilliant.

Squawk, you got the bird's-eye view. Over to you.

Terrific tumbling, Swashbucklers.

Natalie was swift to find the earring.

Milo grabbed the parrot in a flash.

Cook tried to fill the barrel with fish.

But the Swashbucklers knew what to do.

With a leap from Natalie and a final sprint from Milo,

the picture was complete.

There was even time for a team hug!

It's a win!

AUDIENCE CHEERS

You did it! Well done, Swashbucklers.

You've won back our first jewel.

So, Captain Captain, you know the rule!

-ALL:

-Send down a jewel.

No, I don't think I want to.

SQUEAKING

Ah! Rat!

Yeah!

AUDIENCE CHEERS

Oh, and here's the green jewel!

I'll take it out and give it to you, Marcus,

to pop it in the chest, please. There you go.

AUDIENCE CHEERS

Yeah!

I've had enough of that rat.

Cook and Line better have a good plan to get it off of my ship.

-ALL:

-Boo!

Cook, are you sure the rat's going to want to

jump into this huge barrel of slop?

Of course, Line.

It'll eat anything. Look!

It ate right through this cannonball.

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

Ha-ha! Oh, yeah.

-Oh!

-Look, it's even eaten a hole through that mug.

Oh! Ha-ha.

Yeah, that's not going to work.

So, what are we going to do?

SQUEAKING

I think it's in the cabin.

It's eating something right now!

Whoa. Whoa. Ah!

Yeah, it was the chair.

SQUEAKING

It's over there!

Ah!

Quick! It's by the ladder.

BOTH: Ah!

WHISTLE BLOWS

Attention!

Have you caught that rat yet?

BOTH: Have we caught that rat?

-No.

-Ratty's clever.

Squeak! SPLASH

Wait. That splash came from the barrel of slop!

Ha! We've got it.

What's Ratty doing now?

It's kind of a...ratty paddle.

Ha-ha!

Oh! It's actually eating the slop.

Oh, no. It's just eating your hat.

Right. Carry the barrel up the ladder

and throw it into the ship's mess.

The rat seems to like swimming in slop, so it'll be happy in there.

What's Ratty eating now?

I think he's eating a hole in the bottom of the barrel.

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

I think Ratty got away.

I think you could be right.

Bye-bye, Ratty.

Moving on!

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

OK, me hearties. You have to win back four more jewels

to make sure one of the naughty pirates walks the plank.

But before we play the Shipwreck Rummage,

let's do the Swashbuckle Salute one more time. Ready?

Let me see you all marching.

Put your hand on your heart.

Here we go!

-Eye patch.

-Eye patch!

-Pirate hat.

-Pirate hat!

Swashbuckle cheer!

Arrr-harrr!

Yeah! We're ready.

It's the...

Squawk! The aim of the game is to collect the rest of Gem's jewels

that have been hidden around the shipwreck.

Use the map, because X marks the spot

where each of the jewels can be found.

But be careful. Cook, Line and Captain Captain

have hidden the jewels well, and they must all be in the chest

before the time runs out.

AUDIENCE CHEERS

OK, me hearties. You have to find four more of my jewels.

So let me show you where they're hiding on the map.

Up on the top deck, you can find the blue jewel

in one of the barrels of Captain Captain's maps.

Then, on the middle deck, you can find the red jewel

in the pool of pearls.

And on the lower deck, we have the white jewel in the hammocks

and the purple jewel over in the cannonballs.

-Girls, you're going to go first. Which colour will you go for?

-Blue.

Right at the top? OK then. Are we ready to play?

Arrr-harrr!

Then, Swashbucklers away!

BELL RINGS

The girls are off!

Where is Natalie going?

Follow Harriet!

She knows where to go.

You've got to get to the top of the

ship to find the blue jewel.

The fish are flying.

That's it, Swashbucklers. Cheer them on!

They've made it to the top deck.

Nothing to see, nothing to see in there.

-That's what you think, Captain Captain.

-Oh, dear.

Look in the barrels, girls.

Natalie has got the blue jewel!

Yes! They've got it.

-OK, boys, where are you going to go?

-The white one.

The white one? In the hammocks? OK.

Slide, girls, slide.

That's it, girls. Quick as you can.

Well done.

Off you go, boys. Brilliant. Pop it in the chest.

-Yeah!

-The blue jewel is safely home.

And the boys are already at the hammocks!

We're halfway now, team.

There are fish everywhere!

It's by your foot!

Thanks, Gem.

The boys have got the white jewel.

Right, they've got the white one.

-Girls, where are you going next?

-The purple.

-The purple one, OK.

Off you go! That's it!

Well done, Milo, pop it in the chest.

Brilliant!

The white jewel is in the chest.

The girls are straight to the cannonballs,

and looking for the purple.

They got to go right to the bottom.

She's got it!

They've got the purple one. So, boys, boys.

You need to get the red one in the pool of pearls.

We're running out of time, OK?

Come on, girls, quickly, quickly!

Off you go, boys.

That's it, well done. Brilliant!

The purple jewel is in the chest.

But there's not much time.

Marcus dives into the pool of pearls to find the red jewel.

Last ten seconds. Ten!

-Oh, no.

-Nine.

-The countdown has started.

Six. Five. Four.

-Milo's got the red jewel!

-Come on, boys!

-Two, one!

-As quick as you can...

BELL RINGS

Oh, no! We've run out of time.

Squawk, you got the bird's-eye view. Over to you.

What a super close Rummage.

The Swashbucklers soon found three of the jewels.

The boys had one left to find,

and Marcus went headfirst into the pearls to get the red jewel.

But the countdown had started.

Sorry, Gem. It's a lose.

AUDIENCE CHEERS

Oh, Swashbucklers. That was so close.

But we couldn't get the red jewel into the treasure chest in time,

so the naughty pirates don't have to walk the plank today.

-But have you had lots of fun?

-Yeah!

-Yeah.

Let's hear it for my brave Swashbucklers.

AUDIENCE CHEERS

Excellent work, crew. None of us have to walk the plank

into the yuckety, yuckety, yuckety ship's mess.

And I get to keep all of the jewels.

-So twinkly.

-So shiny.

-Yes. And it's all mine.

-Can I have a look, Captain?

-Actually, I was here first.

-I want to have a look.

-No, me.

No, no, get off. No, no, no!

AUDIENCE LAUGHS

Ho-ho! Well, it looks like Captain Captain will have to

go into the stinky ship's mess after all to get that jewel back.

We'll see you next time for more Swashbuckle!

AUDIENCE CHEERS

# Hey-ho, Swashbucklers, go

# Take on the pirates, yo-ho-ho!

# Hey-ho, Swashbucklers, go

# Take on the pirates, yo-ho-ho!

# Hey-ho, Swashbucklers, go

# Take on the pirates, go, go, go! #

-Swashbuckle cheer!

-Squawk!

Arrr-harrr!