Life is a Cabaret The Story of Tracy Beaker


Life is a Cabaret

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# I can make my world come true All my dreams will see me through

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-# It doesn't matter What may come my way...

-No! No!

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# Believe me now I will win some day. #

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SCREAMING

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Come on, Tracy, it's bedtime.

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-Let me watch the end of this.

-No, it's late. You'll get nightmares.

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-Better not go to bed, then.

-You'll be like a zombie at school.

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Oh! Nag, nag, nag, nag, nag, nag. Oh!

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-Cam!

-I mean it. We need to set a few basic rules.

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Rules?! Rules are the last thing I need

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after a lifetime at the Dumping Ground.

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I need humungous doses of tender loving care. But what do I get?!

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A constant ear-bashing from cheesy puff police.

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Tracy, you're going to bed now and that's final.

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You don't want a foster daughter.

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You want someone to boss around.

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Well, I'm not changing. Maybe YOU should be the one to change.

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For a change!

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Good night.

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# It's time, it's time

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# It's time to rise and shine

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# It's time, it's time

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# It's time to rise and shine

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# Time to rise, time to shine

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# Yeah, yeah, rise and shine

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-# Time to rise...

-Time to scrub your manky face

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-# Time to rise and shine

-Comb your greasy hair

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# It's time to smile a cheesy smile

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# That we can all share

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# It's time, it's time

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# It's time to rise and shine

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# It's time, it's time... #

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Either I'm dreaming

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or something very strange and horrible is going on here.

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-You're dreaming, Tracy.

-You're dreaming.

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-You're dreaming.

-So, come on, breakfast time.

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Breakfast time.

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# It's time, it's time

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-# It's breakfast time

-It's breakfast time

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-# It's time, it's time

-It's breakfast time... #

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All right!

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I get the idea. You don't have to break into song every five seconds.

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I may be dreaming but I'm still Tracy Beaker

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and nobody pushes me around.

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# Nobody, but nobody

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# Pushes me around

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# Nobody, but nobody

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# Pushes me around

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# Cos I am the Beaker The one and only Beaker

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# The celebrated, overstated breathtaking, awe-inspiring

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# Fabulous, tremendous But unpretentious Beaker

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# And nobody, but nobody

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# Pushes me around. #

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Lol, Bouncer, my office NOW!

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Yes, boss?

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Miss Beaker is back.

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Miss Beaker? What's she doing here?

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This is a dream, you idiot!

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What a shame!

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In a short while, she'll be a shadow of her former self.

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You will assist me by breaking her spirit ready for bottling.

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-Leave it to us, boss.

-Yeah, we'll sort it, won't we, Bruv?

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CRACK THEIR KNUCKLES

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# We are the heavy lads

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# Loads of muscle, full of charm

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# If you don't want bother You'll pay us quick

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# Or you'll come to harm

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# So bring on the heavy lads

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# We're the ones you need to call

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# Bring on the heavy lads

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-# Satisfaction guaranteed

-No job too small. #

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You're not going to eat that mess, are you?

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It's very nice.

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We simply couldn't wish for a better breakfast.

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# Lovely bubbly porridge

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# Lovely bubbly porridge

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# It smells so good Tasty and appealing

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-# Eat it hot

-Or cold and congealing

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# Any way you want to take it

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# Roast it, boil it, grill or bake it

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# Chew it up and swallow it down

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# Don't you grimace and don't you frown

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# Don't you frown

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# Cos

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# It's lovely bubbly porridge! #

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Crash, I don't believe you!

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Aren't you gonna smash a bowl or something?

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Losing my temper would be a silly response

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to a justified action by my elders and betters.

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But they can't treat you like this.

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Hey, you! Yes, YOU with the frizzy hair.

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Frizzy hair? Right, Crash, watch and learn.

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Miss Beaker, this deviant behaviour will NOT go unpunished.

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# So bring on the heavy lads! #

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Get off!

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# Bring on the heavy lads! #

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-Get to work on this lot.

-Yeah, wash and scrub until you drop.

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Hang on!

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You can't make me do anything.

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Oh, no? ..Bounce, tell her one of your jokes.

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Are they as bad as they are in real life?

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Worse.

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-Right, so there's a little squirrel, yeah... Or was it a worm?

-I dunno.

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Anyway, he was on his way back to his nest... Or...

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Maybe it was just a big stick.

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# La, la, la... #

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Enough frivolity. You have failed to break her spirit.

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Bring her to ME.

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Straightaway, boss.

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Get off me!

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All Dumping Ground inmates will now begin their chores. I repeat,

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all Dumping Ground inmates will now begin their chores.

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There will be no slacking.

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I repeat, there will be NO slacking!

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Get off me!

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Aw, Miss Beaker, how nice of you to drop in.

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Cam?

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What...

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SILENCE! I think it's time

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YOU were acquainted with the rules of this establishment.

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What rules?

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# You will obey my every command

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# You will not say no to any demand

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# These are the rules of MY establishment

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# They're not to be broken, twisted or bent

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-# So no treats,

-no treats

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-# No sweets,

-no sweets

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-# No chatter,

-no chatter

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-# No clutter,

-no clutter

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-# No telly,

-no telly

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-# No jelly,

-no jelly

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-# No fun,

-no fun

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-# No sun,

-no sun

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# No fights

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# And definitely

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-# NO...

-NO...

-NO... LATE NIGHTS. #

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No! What's happened to everyone?

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Where's Crash's temper?

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And Jackie and Layla and everyone, they've lost their spark.

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And the Wellards, what have you done to the Wellards?

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Impressive, isn't it?

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Very soon, Miss Beaker, all will become as clear as crystal.

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In a short while, YOU will be normalised.

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Your rebellious spirit will be removed

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and placed in this bottle,

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and you will think and behave like all the other children here.

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In brief, you will be totally in MY power.

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You'll never succeed. You'll never change me. Never!

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Wake up, wake up, wake up!

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There's no escape from this nightmare. It only gets worse.

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Now, I shall launch my deadliest weapon yet.

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Elaine, is that you?

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I'm your fairy godmother.

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-Oh, that's great. You've got to get me out of here.

-Oh, no.

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I'm just here to magic you that very special dress

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-so that you can go to the ball.

-What ball?

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I just want to get out of this madhouse.

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Tracy, you'd be happier if you just lost that nasty rough sparkiness

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and behaved like a nice normal girlie.

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# Every girl deserves a pretty pink dress

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# Anything less would fail to impress

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# You'll be a star at any function

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# The belle of the ball at every posh luncheon

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# A pretty pink dress is top of the list

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# So take my advice I so insist

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# I so insist, I so insist I SO INSIST! #

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Elaine, some things never change.

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Even in a dream you're a complete and utter pain!

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THAT WAS PATHETIC, ELAINE!

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Sorry, boss.

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Come on, you lot, let's get out of this place.

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Out? What do you mean?

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We have our chores to complete.

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Otherwise the boss will break our spirit bottles.

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She can't bottle your spirits.

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Don't you remember how you used to be?

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Roxy, you were evil.

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Me evil?

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Don't let her win. You're Dumping Ground kids, remember!

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# Every Dumping Ground kid has gotta be bad

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# We've got to stick together So we don't go mad

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# Every Dumping Ground kid's got to fight to survive

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# Every Dumping Ground kid's got to fight to survive

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# So rise above our troubles

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-# And sail on,

-sail on...

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# Every Dumping Ground kid's got to fight to survive

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# Every Dumping Ground kid has gotta be bad

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# We Dumping Ground kids... #

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What do you think you're all doing?

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We're leaving.

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Oh, really?

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Then WE might have to have an unfortunate accident

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with these bottles.

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KIDS: No!

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We might trip by an open window and accidentally fling them out.

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KIDS: No!

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You see? They're not going anywhere.

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They have been normalised.

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And now, Miss Beaker,

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it's YOUR turn.

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Agh!

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Tracy, are you all right?

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Um...

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I just had a bit of a bad dream.

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Oh.

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You were in it.

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-Me?

-You wanted to normalise me.

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-What?

-Make me good.

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Turn me into just another kid.

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I want Tracy Beaker.

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I love you how you are.

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I love you good, I love you bad.

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Nothing is going to change that.

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I like you.

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I know you.

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Now, get to sleep.

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-Good night.

-Good night.

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Promise me one thing, though.

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Don't ever become a care worker, OK?

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Night-night.

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Agh!

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# Cos I am the Beaker The one and only Beaker

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# The celebrated, overstated breathtaking, awe-inspiring

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# Fabulous, tremendous But unpretentious Beaker

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# And nobody, but nobody

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# Pushes me around. #

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E-mail us at [email protected]

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