Episode 14 WHOOPS I MISSED THE BUS


Episode 14

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Ears on and eyes forward.

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It's CBBC's party time,

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and that means 15 minutes of jam-packed Whoops I Missed The Bus.

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Oh, aren't we the lucky ones?

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There's no cake, but there is plenty of this.

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And they're off.

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What on earth are these three up to?

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Do I have a moustache? No.

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Am I a woman? No.

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And you guys are well into it all.

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It is mysterious, adventurous, exotic...

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Now, they might not be able to make balloon giraffes

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but they can flog their way onto centre stage any day of the week.

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It's our resident vloggers Laura and Myles.

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Giraffe, you say?

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Let me give this a go.

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Let's get this party started.

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Hang on, who let Lauren and Rhys out of their bedrooms?

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Oh, this can only end in trouble...or mischief.

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Either way, I'm excited.

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There are books and authors.

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Mmm, and sandwiches.

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It's Awesome Authors, live in Birmingham.

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CHEERING

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Right, so, are you up for a challenge?

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It depends. What is it?

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Whoever takes the best selfie today wins.

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What's the prize?

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Loser buys winner an ice cream.

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Deal.

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Nicola Davies, you have written a book

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all about poo.

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Why?

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Cos poo's very useful stuff. OK.

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When you're a biologist,

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poo can tell you lots of things about an animal.

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I'm having a competition with my other vlogger

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about who can get the best selfie.

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Could you help me out and maybe we could do an animal-themed...?

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SHE GROWLS

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Now, I have to ask. I'm a complete geek girl myself -

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what inspired you to write the book?

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I was a massively geeky teenager.

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I had, like, dinosaur posters and I had rock collections,

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and I named them all and gave them little tags,

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so I was the ultimate geek girl.

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I kind of wanted to write a story about what it felt like

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to be an outsider and not part of the cool gang.

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Rhys... Yeah. ..it's Sam and Mark.

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It's Sam and Mark! Laura, can we...? Chill, Laura.

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Look, we're in public. Hey, Sam, Mark! Oh! It's Sam and Mark.

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You've got some pre-written notes stuck to your back.

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Stick them on your forehead.

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OK. Laura, you go first.

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Do I write fiction?

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Am I alive? No.

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Am I a woman? No.

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It's David Baddiel. Hello.

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What made you want to start writing children's books?

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My son, basically.

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I've got two kids, but my son said something one day

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that gave me an idea.

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He said, "Why doesn't Harry Potter run away from the Dursleys..."

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You know, the horrible muggle family that he lives with? Yep.

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"..and try and find some better parents?"

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And I said, "I don't know but that's given me an idea."

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The idea was a book in which children

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could choose their own parents.

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That was The Parent Agency, which I wrote a couple of years ago.

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Have I written more than one book? No.

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Am I an author? No.

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Oh, no.

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What has been your favourite part of Awesome Authors weekend?

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My favourite part was getting a signature from Lindsey

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and meeting Hacker, and this.

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Hacker T Dog? I've seen him around somewhere.

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He is around here somewhere. Where is he?

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It's Philip Ardagh.

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Lost And Found or The Next Step?

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Having no idea what either of them are,

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I'd say both

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but just small portions.

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Both, but small portions.

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That's a good answer.

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Three, two, one.

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Let's ball.

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Use that tiki-taka football. One-two, one-two.

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It's a game of two halves. Well, not here.

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We've got about 30 seconds, so please score.

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Would you have any tips for any budding authors out there?

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Take a really exciting science news story

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and then say to yourself, "What if?"

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So, ask the big "What if?"

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Ask the big "What if?" And go there.

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Travel across the universe.

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Don't think small, think big. There we go.

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POP MUSIC PLAYS

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Do I have a moustache? No.

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Am I on CBBC? No. Oh!

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It's David O'Doherty and Chris Judge, everybody.

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BOTH: Whoo!

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You guys have written a book called Danger Is Everywhere.

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If that is true,

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where is the danger?

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Because I'm getting a little bit scared.

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Like, this table, for instance.

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It could flip, guys. Look...

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ALL: Whoa!

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Hey! THEY LAUGH

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Come on, guys. People have paid good money to watch this.

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Well, it is a free event but you know what I'm talking about.

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Are we going to guess this? No, you've no chance.

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You are the canteen assistant from So Awkward.

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Allan!

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Stick to vlogging, will you? Losers.

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Yes! No!

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You've only gone and done it.

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High five.

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Ronaldo! Sorry...

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Ronald-no!

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Pretty good day, all in all, Laura. And do you know what?

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I reckon I totally won that selfie competition.

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Yeah, whatever. Come on, let's have a look.

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Come on. I like that one. Yeah. All right. That's fine.

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I think we have a winner. Yes! Yeah, OK. All right. Yes!

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That's a really good one. Supreme.

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Shall we get your ice cream, then? Yes, please.

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Can I have a 99 with a flake, please?

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Strawberry sauce and sprinkles.

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Maybe some chocolate sauce, too.

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Do you have any of those little sweeties? Do you know what?

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I'm just going to leave you here in Birmingham. Laura...

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Actually, can I have raspberry sauce with chocolate sprinkles, too?

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Let's have some milk, as well. Do you guys serve milk?

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Chaos! And while Rhys carries on with that ice-cream order,

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you lot have been creating vlogs of your very own.

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15-second fans, the stage is yours!

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Hi, guys. I just wanted to say that

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I love all the CBBC shows,

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especially The Next Step.

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They have such drama in it

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and they're really good characters.

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I just love it.

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CBBC is the best!

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I can't stop watching it.

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Lovely work.

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My favourite show's How To Be Epic At Everything

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cos it makes you epic.

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It shows how to see backwards,

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how to do magic tricks...

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how to...

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do a spin, like Beckham.

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It's just hard to keep up.

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Do you know what I mean? It's so good. Well done.

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My favourite TV shows are The Next Step and Wolfblood.

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The Next Step because it's got really good dancing

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and it inspires me to dance.

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And Wolfblood because they just go on loads of adventures

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and you don't know what's going to happen next. Get in!

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My favourite TV show has got to be Wolfblood

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because it's mysterious,

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adventurous, exotic

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and it is always interesting and exciting.

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It is never boring.

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I absolutely love Wolfblood!

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Great work, my 15-second beauties.

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Now, I don't know how or why an Airmageddon drone raced a bike,

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but I'm glad it did because it's right rare stuff.

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Ha-ha, rare-mageddon.

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Play the clip.

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Nearly two metres tall,

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weighing just under 80 kilos.

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He is one of the fastest men,

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on a track bike, in the world.

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The Weaponised Assault Ship.

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Wasp, for short.

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Weighing in at 5.8 kilos

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and 1.6 metres wide,

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this thing can seriously sting.

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For this race,

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both drone and cyclist

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will do one lap of the Velodrome.

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The one who crosses the finish line first wins.

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And they're off!

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Not a great start for the Wasp,

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a bit slow off the mark there.

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Andy's seen his chance and he is running away with the lead.

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Andy's already halfway through the lap.

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Wasp really needs to put its foot down to stay in this race.

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Andy is speeding to the finish,

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Wasp hasn't even made it to the halfway line.

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KLAXON

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I have been wondering what Hank Zipzer's been up to recently,

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and if you also are sitting at home saying,

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"Oh, Myles, you've just said what... I have also been wondering,"

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well, at his school, there has been a top-teacher contest.

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Hank!

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Will you make a speech tomorrow explaining why I should be

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Westbrook's top teacher? You bet! Oh, yes!

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Will you make a speech tomorrow explaining why I should be

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Westbrook's top teacher? I'd be honoured, miss.

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SHE SIGHS Well, thank you, Nicholas!

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Thanks, Nicholas. Ms Adolf and Mr Rock have chosen who they want to

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do their speeches and Hank is worried about what to say

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in his speech, because a speech is a big thing.

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You know, doing a speech, you've got to make sure

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you say all the right...

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..words.

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Mr Rock is Westbrook's best teacher. That's obvious.

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So why is my speech so lame?

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LASER SOUND EFFECT

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Wait... Got it! Everything's better with sound effects!

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"Everything's better with sound effects"?

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I mean, I'm not sure I quite agree...

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SLIPPING NOISE, CRASH!

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Why was there a banana in my... in the bed...? Why was...?

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And why do bananas make such a loud sound, anyway?

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I mean, sure, Hank, for a speech,

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more sound effects could make it more interesting.

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Livens it up, keeps the audience entertained,

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but not for every type of speech.

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You're in a church, getting married -

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"Do you take this man to be your husband?" "I..."

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BOOING

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All this top-teacher business, as well, is happening on April the 1st

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and, if you know your dates well, that's April Fools' Day,

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the day of jokes, pranks, hilarious goofs and spoofs.

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It's also the start of a brand-new, beautiful month.

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Just explain to me why you want to ban April Fools' Day.

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It's just a waste of time.

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I got horribly pranked this April - when I asked my friends if

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they wanted to hang out, they said they were busy!

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And then on April the 2nd, I said the same. Still busy.

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But anyway, top-teacher speech. Let's get back to that.

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I wouldn't know what to write for that.

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I did have a really good teacher once who told me

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I could do anything that I set my eyes on,

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erm...but then told me I did need glasses and moved me

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to sit at the front row of the class,

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so I could do anything I set my eyes on,

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as long as it was right in front of my face and I was squinting.

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Step into the future at Westbrook.

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You won't believe your eyes.

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I know everyone's laughing,

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but I think she does deserve to be top teacher after that.

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Why would you laugh at a teacher who's just turned into a robot?

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She's grown past human existence and turned into a machine.

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This isn't a laughing matter! This is science!

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Also, it's all made out of cardboard,

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but even robots have feelings. That's my shoulder, but...

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And maybe even on April Fools' Day, the day of laughing and goofing,

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we should be aware not just of how people feel,

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but how robots do, too, and that top-teacher award,

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maybe it should go to the teacher of life, giving us the lesson...

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SLIP! CRASH!

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So many bananas on the fl...

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I don't think sound effects make everything better.

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BOOING OK, I'm sorry!

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So, today I'm vlogging about Taking The Next Step...

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Actually, do you know what? I've changed my mind.

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I can't take this any more.

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Getting up early in the mornings, filming vlogs... I quit!

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Today, we want to see you talk. We want to see you come to life.

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Well, hang on a moment. That's not what you said in the dressing room.

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That's what we just talked about.

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I think we need to be clear, because...

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Can we just stop filming for a moment? OK, stop, stop.

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What happened?

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You see, now THAT...is acting improvisation!

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LAUGHTER It's called good acting, darlings!

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So, last week's Taking The Next Step saw day two of the

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national auditions, and the dancers were given an acting challenge.

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The theme we'd like you to act out today are four dancers

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at a dance competition.

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Now, maybe you're just arriving at the competition,

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seeing who you're competing against...

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OK, well, how hard can improvising be?

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Prrrr! Prrrr! Mah! Mah! Mah!

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What do you think you're doing?

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It's...my warm-up before I audition for nationals.

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"Warm-up"? You sound like a cat on fire.

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Wow! If you think that, then...

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Erm, I've forgotten my line.

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Oh, wait, I don't have a line.

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SHE SIGHS

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OK, so it's harder than it looks,

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but it's a good job that it's this lot doing it and, erm...not me.

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You've got those stretches. Look what I can do.

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Ah! Oh, my gosh! Someone call an ambulance! I will!

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My gosh! Who knew that improvisation could be so intense?

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Also, in this episode of Taking The Next Step,

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it is absolutely full of drama.

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We've made a decision.

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SHE SIGHS

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You guys will not be going through the next round.

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We'd like to take you with us to the next round.

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O-M-D, it was so intense! Something to lighten the mood?

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DANCE MUSIC

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Tee Cee, I loved that. You are taking vlogging to the next step.

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Do you get it? "Taking The..." Ah, never mind. It's time for...

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'This is the life.

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'On my favourite carpet, watching my favourite CBBC show, List Of Names.

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'It's brilliant fun, but it never lasts long enough.

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'So you fold that bit up there, then you tape that side up...

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'I could do with a pen to note this down.

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'Actually, I could do with a pair of hands.

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'That would make being an art ninja a lot, lot easier. Heh-heh-heh!

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'Seb, I'm watching Wolfblood and it's a bit tense!

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'Oh, much better!

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'CBBC dramas are great, but it's even greater when Seb comforts me!

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'Sophie! I've lost the telly again!

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'Oh, there it is. I am silly.

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'# CBBC... Hoooo... #'

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Now it's time to take all of last week's best bits,

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mush them down into a fine paste and soak it up with your eyes,

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just like you would do with any paste.

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Don't do that. But do watch this.

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Once her nose touches the ball... Mm.

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..you push your thumb down on the clicker... Mm-hm.

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..and replace it with the meat...

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like that.

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You ready to give it a go? Mm-hm.

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On the other hand. Use the target.

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Look at that! Kathleen didn't even flinch.

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It was just like treating a bigger version than my pet cat.

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"Bigger"? You mean huge!

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# When I was out in the arcades

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# Guess who walked in, wearing some dark shades?

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# A not completely unattractive girl, but still

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# She was hogging all the car games On a caravan trip with my auntie

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# I look up at a cliff, who do I see?

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# It's getting ridiculous, now

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# You'd think I was making up this, I wish, pal

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# The cinema... Clem The high road... Clem

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# If you want to step onto my road I don't think I can hide again

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# I might just be out of my mind

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# Cos when I turn on the TV, yes, it was televised

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# I even saw Clem in my clementine

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# Whoa, maybe it's a sign

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# I ain't sure, but it's playing on my mind... #

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Lindsey! How many miles did the mission patch have to travel

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up to to go to space? These are silly questions!

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Throw it at her! Two miles!

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It was 200 miles!

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Yes! Barney, name the original illustrator of The BFG.

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Er, that is, uh...Quentin Blake. Quentin Blake!

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Argh!

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I love this game!

0:14:400:14:41

It's all going on down there, look.

0:14:410:14:43

There's a lad there with a bit of paper, look.

0:14:430:14:45

LAUGHTER

0:14:450:14:46

There's a girl on her phone. She's just on her phone, she doesn't care.

0:14:460:14:49

There's a little lad.

0:14:490:14:50

She's got a bit of paper, that girl's got some paper...

0:14:500:14:54

They've all got bits of paper!

0:14:540:14:55

That's it for another week, but don't shed a tear - you can catch up

0:14:550:14:58

with everything you've seen here, plus much more, on the CBBC iPlayer.

0:14:580:15:02

But for now, my friends, I am packed up and ready to board that bus.

0:15:020:15:06

Or not. Off it goes. Good job I've got me hiking boots, innit?

0:15:060:15:09

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