Wallace and Gromit: A Matter of Loaf and Death


Wallace and Gromit: A Matter of Loaf and Death

Comic adventure starring the hapless inventor and his canine companion. Wallace and Gromit's new bakery business faces danger when the 'Cereal Killer' targets the town's bakers.


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Transcript


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# If I knew you were comin'

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# I'd have baked a cake Baked a cake... #

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BAKER HUMS

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Huh?

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Oh! It's you.

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Eh?!

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No...!

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THUMP!

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GROMIT GULPS

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ALARM BELLS RING

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BEEP!

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KLAXON WAILS

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Mmm... Lovely cheese!

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RATTLE!

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I could just wash it down with a nice...

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Oh! Ooh...!

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I was just coming, lad!

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Up, away, Gromit!

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With you in a jiffy!

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Tally-ho!

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Oh, no!

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Thanks, lad!

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Whoa! Oh!

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Fill 'er up, lad!

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Ah. Lovely cuppa, Gromit!

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But...a slightly diesel-y aftertaste, perhaps?

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How's that breakfast coming on?

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Well done, lad.

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Very well done!

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Thanks, chuck!

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Whoa! Oh, dear. Another baker, battered with his own rolling pin.

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Would you credit it?

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Still, looking on the bright side, I suppose it means

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more business for us, eh, Gromit?

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We're on a roll, lad!

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Good day's work, lad! We're bang on...

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..target.

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# I'm light as a feather I'm the Bake-O-Lite girl... #

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-BELL RINGS

-Coo-ey!

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Gromit! Did you see who that was?

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-SHE CRIES OUT

-She's in trouble!

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Ooh, help! Argh!

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Here, Gromit. Take the wheel.

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Help! Help!

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Don't fret, Madam!

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Teacakes, lad. The wholemeal fruit, on me knees!

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Whoa...!

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I should have tried the granary rolls...

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Oh, 'eck!

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SHE SCREAMS

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Oh... Oh, dear! Are you all right, Miss... Madam?

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Oh, I do apologise!

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Oh! It's an honour to be of help.

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I must get those brakes seen to.

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We're so grateful, aren't we, Fluffles?

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-Fluffles!

-Oh, it was nothing!

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Oh... What a lovely little doggy!

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My name's Piella. Piella Bakewell.

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Oh! I know who you are, miss!

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# Light as a feather You're the Bake-O-Lite girl! #

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Oh! That's me!

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I'm Wallace. I'm in bread myself.

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Oh, really?

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Are you still ballooning, Miss...?

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I do beg your pardon?!

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Oh, no, no! I mean the Bake-O-Lite balloon.

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-Do you still fly it?

-Oh!

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Oh, I see. No. Not any more.

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Well, back to the grind, as it were.

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-Goodbye, Miss Bakewell.

-Oh, I'd rather say "au revoir".

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Oh... Oui, oui, Madame!

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And bon appetit!

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-Bye-ee!

-CYCLE BELL RINGS

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Oh...

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The Bake-O-Lite girl!

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Fancy that, Gromit!

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It's not every day you meet the girl of your dreams, is it?

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Oh, well. This isn't going to put bread on the table, is it?!

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-DOORBELL RINGS

-Oh...

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Oh! Hello.

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We were just passing by, going for a walk,

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and Fluffles insisted on dropping in,

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hoping you would join us. Please say yes, she'll be so disappointed,

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wouldn't you, Fluffy?

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Wouldn't you, Fluffy?

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FLUFFY WHIMPERS

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Oh! Well, if you insist, but I'm in me work things.

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I like a man in uniform. Come on!

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-Walkies!

-Manage without me, won't you, lad?

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GROMIT SIGHS

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THEY LAUGH TOGETHER

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Oh, crumbs!

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OVEN PINGS

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DOORBELL RINGS

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PIELLA GIGGLES

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-Oh, Mr Wallace, you are cheeky!

-Ooh, am I?

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MUSIC: "O Solo Mio"

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SPANISH-STYLE MUSIC PLAYS

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MUSIC: "Unchained Melody" by The Righteous Brothers

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PIELLA GIGGLES AND LAUGHS

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MUSIC PLAYS AND PIELLA GIGGLES

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ALARM CLOCK RINGS

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Oh, makes a change, doesn't it, my fudge cake?

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Gromit's gonna love this!

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Well, I thought you could do with a woman's touch around the house,

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you naughty, slovenly boys!

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What do you think, Gromit?!

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You wouldn't know it was our place, would you, lad?

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KNOCK AT DOOR

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-DISTANT:

-Care for another sausage, you greedy thing?

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Don't mind if I do.

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-PIELLA LAUGHS

-My, what an appetite!

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FLUFFLES GIGGLES

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Fluffles! Where are you?

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FLUFFLES WHIMPERS

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Same time tomorrow, my apple strudel!

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THUNDER CRACKS IN DISTANCE

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Oh, love is a many-splendoured thing, Gromit,

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but it doesn't half tire you out!

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I'm cream-crackered!

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Oh, 'eck!

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Piella's purse! I must return it forthwith.

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Oh... Erm, Gromit...?

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THUNDER RUMBLES

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DOOR CREAKS

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TELEVISION ON, INAUDIBLE

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DOOR SLAMS

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LIGHTNING CRACKS, THUNDER RUMBLES

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STAIR SQUEAKS

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MANNEQUINS CLUNK

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DOOR OPENS

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Funny... I'm sure I heard something.

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FLUFFLES SNIFFS

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Oh! There it is.

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It must have been there all along.

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Early night, Fluffles.

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Big day tomorrow.

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Our final baker is nicely buttered up!

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SHE CHUCKLES

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Good night, Fluffles.

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Sweet dreams!

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FLUFFLES WHIMPERS

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PIELLA SNORES

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CAR SCREECHES TO HALT

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CAR DOOR OPENS, SLAMS

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Oh! Hello, stranger! Where have YOU been?

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Hey! Wait! Hold your horses!

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I've got something to tell YOU first, old pal.

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Haven't we, dearest?

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Of course, my little cheesecake!

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Wallace and I...are engaged...

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to be married.

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Till death do us part!

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I think congratulations might be in order, lad.

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Oh, I can see he's dying to give me a great big kiss!

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Mmmmmmm-wah!

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I know we're going to get on like a house on fire.

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One big happy family!

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SAWING

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DRILLING

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HAMMERING

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BELL TOLLS

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DOORBELL RINGS

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Hello, my vanilla slice!

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Ha-ha! Come in, my sponge cake!

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Oh!

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-What's going on?!

-You'll have to forgive him, my petal.

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-Ooh!

-He's been a bit security-conscious of late.

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Well, you can't be too careful these days, can you?

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-What, with a serial killer on the loose!

-Oh, yes!

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Now...how about a nice pot of cock-a-leekie soup?

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Ho-ho, smashing! I've got just the bread to go with it.

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Eh?

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What the...?

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That dog!

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< Smells delicious!

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< Oh, I do hope you like it, my shortcrust.

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< It's my own special recipe.

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What the...?! Hey!

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What are you playing at, lad?! This is getting ridiculous.

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Oh, Wallace, he just wants a bit of attention, that's all.

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Now, my little poochie-woochie,

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let Auntie Piella sort you out.

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Gr-r-r-r! Ow! Ow! He bit me!

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-Eh?!

-I was just trying to help, and he bit me, Wallace!

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-Gromit!

-Oh!

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How dare you bite my betrothed!

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That's very impolite.

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Oh, don't be TOO hard on him, Wallace, please.

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Just a little punishment, that's all.

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I'm surprised at you, Gromit, I really am.

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Oh, Wallace, my sugar dumpling, have you got a mo? >

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Oh! On my way, my cupcake!

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You'll not leave this kitchen till you've done every last one.

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I don't know! Taking a bite out of my beloved fiancee!

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It really is the limit!

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I'm such a silly sausage.

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It just sort of fell off my foot.

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Stay well back, my precious. Leave it to me.

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Oh, you're so brave, Wallace...

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my minced pie.

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Huh?

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Got it! Huh?

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Oh!

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PIELLA COUGHS

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Are you all right, my flower?

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Oh - "flower"! Get it? Flour?

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Get your hands off me!

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I hate flour...

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I hate bread...

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and I hate bakers,

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-you utter and complete fruitcake!

-Oh!

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That's a bit steep, isn't it, my sweet?

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Fluffles, I want a word with you...

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back 'ome.

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DOOR SLAMS

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Oh, thanks, old pal.

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I just don't get it.

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One minute they love bakers

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and the next minute, they hate them.

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And I'm not a fruitcake, am I, lad?

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I suppose you can't be everybody's cup of tea, can you?

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CLINK!

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DOORBELL RINGS

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Oh...!

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I'm so sorry, Wallace, so, so, sorry.

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I don't know what came over me.

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-Apart from the flour, of course!

-SHE LAUGHS

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Oh. Ha-ha! Yes.

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Let's forget about it. Here's a cake to celebrate.

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-ALARM SOUNDS

-Oops! Must be my keys.

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-Celebrate?

-Us - getting back together again, you gooseberry fool.

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Oh, y... Oh, yes. Yes, of course. Of course.

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We could have that with our four o'clock tea. Won't you join us?

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Oh, I would, but Fluffles isn't feeling too well.

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Why don't you two celebrate?

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Must fly!

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-FRONT DOOR CLOSES

-Ooh, roll on four o'clock, eh?

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This'll go down a treat!

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FAINT WHIMPERING

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WHIMPERING

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MONKEY WHIRS AND CRASHES

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Got you, you meddling mutt!

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So nice of you to come.

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Pity you'll miss your master's tea party.

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It'll go off with a bang!

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Ooh, I say!

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Get the kettle on, Gromit.

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PIELLA CACKLES, FLUFFLES WHIMPERS

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I'll deal with you two later.

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PIELLA CACKLES

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Come on, lad!

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Hah! What's keeping you?

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-CLOCK CHIMES

-At last...

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my 13th...

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my baker's dozen!

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RUMBLING >

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Huh?

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What?!

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Curse that balloon!

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And curse that prevailing south-westerly -

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they'll be there in no time!

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CLOCK STRIKES THE HOUR

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Doh!

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Strike a light!

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CLOCK STRIKES A SECOND TIME

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CLOCK STRIKES A THIRD TIME

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Ah-ha!

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-CLOCK STRIKES A FOURTH TIME

-Oh, there you are!

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I think these matches are a bit...

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damp.

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Oh, yes, it's one of those joke candles, lad!

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Oi! Where are you going with that...

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DISTORTED: ..ca-a-a-a-ake?

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Gromit! It's a bomb!

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The cake's a bomb!

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Wait a minute. You...don't think...Piella could be...?

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The serial killer?

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Well done, Wallace. Sharp as a brick!

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Now, do exactly as I say or Fluffles gets snuffled.

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Ow!

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FLUFFLES YELPS

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You've crossed me once too often, you treacherous little...!

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Get that thing away, lad!

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QUACK! QUACK!

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MEOW! MEOW!

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That's it, lad - use your loaf!

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Oops!

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Oh...!

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That HAS put a spanner in the works.

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But, Piella, you're the Bake-O-Lite girl!

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WAS the Bake-O-Lite girl. I ate too much, you see.

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Oh, really?

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I couldn't ride the balloon any more.

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-Oh, dear!

-So they dropped me.

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What a blow. ..Ooh!

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Me! A curse on bakers and their loathsome confections!

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Gromi-i-it!

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Uh?

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Wha...?

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Oh! Ooh! Ah! Ooh! Ah!

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-MECHANICAL WHIRRING

-Huh?

0:23:140:23:17

Well done, lad! Uh?

0:23:190:23:23

Lass?

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Come to Mummy, Fluffy-Wuffy!

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Ooh!

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-Ooh!

-Attagirl! Go for the knockout.

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Ow!

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Don't worry about me, lad -

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I'm fully in control.

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A-a-argh!

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Yes!

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No!

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-Ah!

-Oh, dear!

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SHE GROANS WITH EFFORT

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Oh... >

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< Oh. Ha-ha...

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Anyone seen the bomb?

0:24:360:24:38

What? ..What?

0:24:400:24:44

SHE YELPS

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Bon voyage, Wallace!

0:24:450:24:48

Your buns are as good as toasted!

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Oh! Oh, oh, oh, oh...!

0:24:540:24:56

Gromit, I've got a bomb in me pants!

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Help me, Gromit! Do something!

0:24:590:25:05

Oh!

0:25:050:25:06

Ooh! Aah!

0:25:090:25:12

Oh! Ooh! It tickles!

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Ooh! Ooh! Aah!

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A-a-argh!

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BOOM!

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Oh, what a relief!

0:25:350:25:37

Oh, evening, Sisters!

0:25:370:25:40

THEY GASP

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I will be back to get you, Wallace! I will have my baker's dozen!

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But, Piella, the balloon won't hold you.

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They can't just drop ME!

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I'm as light as a feather!

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I'm the Bake-O-Lite gi-i-i-rl!

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No!

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SPLASH!

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SNAPPING, RIPPING

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LOUD BURP

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Farewell, my angel cake.

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You'll always be my Bake-O-Lite girl.

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Ha! I think I need a cup of tea after all that.

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Care to join me, you two?

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Aw! Never mind, lad.

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We've both been through the mill this week, haven't we?

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But at least yours

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wasn't a bread-hating, baker-murdering serial killer, eh?

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Like mine!

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Tell you what, lad, let's go and deliver some bread, eh?

0:27:200:27:24

That'll cheer us up!

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-A-a-argh!

-TYRES SCREECH

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Hey, hey! Aw!

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Always room for a small one!

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# And they called it puppy love... #

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Whoa! Both paws on the wheel, lad! Concentrate!

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Wallace and Gromit have opened a new bakery - Top Bun - and business is booming, not least because a deadly Cereal Killer has murdered all the other bakers in town. Gromit is worried that they may be the next victims, but Wallace does not care, as he has fallen head over heels in love with Piella Bakewell, former star of the Bake-O-Lite bread commercials. So Gromit is left to run things on his own, when he would much rather be getting better acquainted with Piella's lovely pet poodle Fluffles.

But then Gromit makes a shocking discovery which points to the killer's true identity. Can he save his master from becoming the next baker to be butchered? And does Fluffles know more than she is saying? It all adds up to a classic 'who-doughnut' mystery, as four-time Academy Award-winning director Nick Park creates a hilarious new masterpiece in the tradition of 'master of suspense' Alfred Hitchcock.

Featuring the voices of Peter Sallis (Wallace) and Sally Lindsay (Piella Bakewell).


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