Episode 31 Debatable

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Hello and welcome to Debatable,

where today one player must answer a series of tricky questions

to try and walk away with a jackpot of over £3,000.

But they're not on their own.

They'll have a panel of celebrities debating their way to the answers.

Will they be able to talk the talk? That's Debatable. Let's meet them.

Chin-wagging their way to the answers today we have

actress Sunetra Sarker,

we have writer Germaine Greer

and comedian Russell Kane.

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Sunetra, you're in the middle seat.

Does this mean you're taking charge of our panel today?

Well, I'm honoured with the promotion,

except I am feeling slightly nervous,

because that means I have to sort of look after this rowdy bunch.

-The lovely thing is they're not rowdy yet.

-Yes.

But I'm looking at Germaine,

and I have seen you on many shows, Germaine.

I don't think I've ever seen you lose a debate.

-Really?

-You talk sense pretty much every time.

I wouldn't take that, Germaine.

Well, if you do talk sense, you're likely to lose the debate.

You have to talk a certain amount of nonsense.

-The strategy is, whatever Germaine says, agree with it.

-What?!

It looks like the perfect panel.

Let's see if you can help out our guest.

It's time to meet today's contestant!

APPLAUSE

-Welcome to the show, Chris.

-Nice to see you.

-Nice to meet you.

-Thank you.

-Tell us a little bit about yourself.

I'm a retired - only just recently retired - solicitor, and, erm,

basically, I do am dram, which is amateur dramatics,

and that sort of takes up quite a lot of time.

-And you're married, of course.

-Oh, yes. Yes, yes, I'm married.

40 years now. It seems like yesterday.

-ALL:

-Ahhhh!

So, tell us a little bit about the family.

Ah, well, my wife Celia, we've got a son called Tim

and a daughter called Jo, and she's got two little boys of four and two.

-And yourself and Celia look after those occasionally?

-Well, yes.

Not too much. They live in Reading, which is just far enough to, erm...

not have to baby-sit.

But we do see them quite a lot.

I've got to shake your hand there for honesty.

There's lots of grandparents watching. None would admit that.

And what stuff would you like to see coming up?

Quite keen on film and theatre and musicals.

-A little bit about politics.

-And what do you make of today's panel?

Wow! Well, I'm overwhelmed. They're absolutely fabulous.

As we go on, you're going to have to pay close attention,

because you will only be choosing one of them to help you

in today's Final Debate.

-Right.

-Are you ready to play?

-Certainly am.

-Best of luck, Chris.

Let's play Round One!

OK, Chris, in this round, it is multiple choice.

There will be four possible answers. Only one is correct.

We have four questions in this round. Each answer's worth £200,

so a possible £800 to go into your prize pot, which of course

you'll play for at the end of the show in the Final Debate.

-Ready to go?

-Yep.

-Let's get cracking. Question one.

-I've got an idea, but I think I might need a bit of help.

-OK.

Playing his cards close to his chest.

No doubt our debaters will be able to sort this out very quickly.

Panel, your debate starts now.

-So, bears!

-Does anyone have an inkling before we even get going?

Because I honestly don't. I'm up for reasoning it out. I don't know.

I'm going to throw moustachioed bear out there, because I think

that's a joke answer, but it could be the real answer.

I think for something so... I mean, who would ever dream of

calling a bear a moustachioed bear?

You would need to ask, wouldn't you, whether the monocled bear

-had two eyes?

-Yes.

Because if it did, it's a bit odd that one of them appears

to be wearing a monocle, which is probably a stripe around the eye.

So I'm leaning towards spectacled bear,

because we have other spectacled beasts. We have spectacled bats.

-Mm-hm.

-The only one who's worrying me is bearded bear.

-You get bearded in other creatures, as well.

-Oh, do you?

-I've heard of spectacled...

-There is a lot of bearding going on.

There's a bearded dragon.

Most of those bearded dragons live in the East End.

-You realise that, don't you?

-I'm glad YOU said that!

No, no, I'm talking about the real lizard! It's a very popular pet.

Russell and I thought that was hipsters you were talking about.

Yeah. I thought it was something to do with Hackney or soy lattes.

Did either of you think I had a theory with my moustachioed bear?

-I think we can discount moustachioed.

-OK.

Well, should we go for spectacled because we believe there is

a spectacled bat?

So, we have decided that the only bear native to South America

is called the spectacled bear.

So, Chris, any sense talked there, anything to direct you?

Well, I can't see bears with spectacles, really.

Obviously, it's not real spectacles, but, erm...

I'm inclined to go for bearded bear.

So, based on the panel's debate...

No, not based on their debate at all.

LAUGHTER

-RUSSELL:

-Go on, Chris!

What I'm saying, Chris, is based on the lack of knowledge

from the panel, you've decided to go your own way.

-SUNETRA:

-Go, Chris.

-Well, that's right.

But not because I think there was anything wrong with what they

said, but I just have a feeling it's more likely to be bearded

bear than anything else. I'm probably quite wrong.

-But that's what I'm going for.

-OK, I like it.

A man who knows his own mind.

He's going against the panel. Our panel went for spectacled bear.

You believe it is bearded bear. For £200, the correct answer is...

-Ahhh!

-..spectacled bear.

Yes, well, I was wrong. But it was worth a try.

It was worth a try. Spectacled bears are also called the Andean bears.

They're among the smallest members of the bear family. There he is.

-RUSSELL:

-He should have gone to Bearsavers, shouldn't he?

Here comes your next question.

Right, well, erm...

..I certainly believe chief superintendent is a rank.

Erm, I'm not absolutely sure about the others.

I think I'm going to need some help again.

Don't worry, that's what they're here for.

Panel, your debate starts now.

-Right.

-Obviously, you know this. You must do.

-What do you mean, just because I've played a policewoman on TV?

-Yeah!

How did your research go with that part?

Well, I've recently been playing a detective chief inspector.

That's not up there. So I definitely know chief and inspector exist.

However, I think you can be a sergeant in any of

those branches, so I believe the sergeant inspector exists,

even though that stands out to me as being the oddest,

don't you think, sergeant inspector?

You don't have to say anything, but anything you do say...

-Very good! You're good.

-Erm, commander seems to ring a bell,

the one that always comes in with the tassels on his breast pocket,

the posh one that's only in every five episodes in The Bill?

-Isn't he normally a commander?

-Now, I will stop you there and say, look,

they've said the Metropolitan Police,

which makes me think commander is a US version of a police rank.

Don't you think deputy assistant commissioner...?

-It's desperate, isn't it?

-It sounds a bit ridiculous.

-I mean, you've got a deputy...

-It feels bureaucratic enough

to be real, if you know what I mean.

I feel like there would be a deputy assistant commissioner.

My instinct says I definitely know there's a chief superintendent.

Sergeant inspector sounds like one of those hybrids that

I think exist but we don't hear about it often.

I don't know, but just by reasoning it out we've come to commander.

-Shall we go for commander?

-I feel like we should just...

Based on our wonderful analysis, the panel have chosen commander.

So, Chris, the panel have gone for commander.

Anything in there that's made any sense, fired any memories?

Hm, yes, I was very interested to hear what they said,

and I basically am inclined to agree with them.

So I also think commander is not a rank in the Metropolitan Police.

OK. You're agreeing with our panel. For £200, is that correct?

PANEL: Whoa!

-Wrong one.

-Sergeant inspector.

-I'm so sorry.

I felt sergeant was going to pull us down, so I went to commander.

-What would you know? You only lived as a policewoman!

-Sorry!

-OK, Chris, no money there.

-That's all right.

But we've got two more chances in this round.

Here we go, here's your third question.

-Classic films, Chris.

-Yes, this is certainly my thing.

I know all the Hitchcock films practically - not off by heart,

but I do know which of those is not a work by Daphne du Maurier.

-Hold that...

-I won't say it yet.

-Yes.

I like what you've done there.

Let's test our panel to see how their Hitchcock knowledge is.

Panel, your debate starts now.

-So, really, we're just trying to prove ourselves to Chris now!

-Yes.

-It's like an audition for Chris!

-So, what I'll start off with,

I can start off by saying I do know that Rebecca is...

-We all know Rebecca's...

-So we can write that one out.

-That's GCSE stuff.

-So we'll move on from there.

-Which is the one you're going to knock out?

-No, go on.

I've just done mine. You told me it was GCSE, so now A-level, Russell.

Tell us what the next one is.

I love literature, but, sad to say, I'm not a du Maurier fan.

If I had to reason it out based on my knowledge of literature, I think

she's more ghostly, haunting and suggestive rather than

-birds pecking at the face.

-Mm-hm.

So I'm guessing she wrote Jamaica Inn and Strangers On A Train

rather than The Birds. But I could be wrong.

-Erm, hm...

-Do you know the answer, Germaine?

Well, I'm trying to remember Strangers On A Train.

-I'm not doing terribly well.

-Hang on a second,

Strangers On A Train wasn't Patricia Highsmith, was it?

-That's just come to me in a flash.

-No, I don't think so.

-I don't know.

I'm on the point of agreeing that it's The Birds,

because I seem to remember a discussion of how that was

developed as a film, and it's got such

a linear progress it just doesn't feel very du Maurier.

I'm happy to go with what you guys are suggesting.

So, we, the panel, feel that The Birds is the film of Hitchcock's

that was not based on a work by Daphne du Maurier.

OK, they're doing for The Birds, but the good news is, Chris,

-you think you know this.

-I do.

Erm, Strangers On A Train was definitely based on

-a work by Patricia Highsmith.

-RUSSELL:

-I knew it!

At least, I think that's definite, but, er...!

But I know all the others were Hitchcock films,

so I'm going for Strangers On A Train.

OK, you're saying Strangers On A Train. The correct answer...

If that is Highsmith, I'm going to start listening to my voices.

-..Strangers On A Train!

-Was it Highsmith?

Strangers On A Train was based on a Patricia Highsmith novel.

Chris, can I please have a proxy point for almost being right?

- You WERE right! - Yes.

What we're going to do, Chris, we're going to take the next question,

we're going to get Russell a little bit of therapy and we'll

crack on from there. The good news is there's £200 in the prize pot.

We're up and running. Here we go.

OK, next question.

-Erm, I'm not absolutely sure, to be honest!

-Are you a fan of the selfie?

Erm, well, I've never taken one,

because I just don't do that sort of thing.

But, erm, I do know what it is!

I'm not sure what glamping is, I'm sorry to say.

I probably ought to.

-But, erm, I think I'm going to need some more help.

-OK.

I'm sure one or two members of the panel have been

glamping in their time. Your debate starts now.

-Who's glamped?

-It's "glamour camping".

-Correct.

Camping with luxury on the side. So it's not really...

Shall we try and hazard a guess each for when we think each one

started being used, based on our memories? Emoji.

-If you had to say the year...

-I'm pretty sure emoji was last year,

because I was reading a ladies' magazine which was talking

about the entries into the Oxford Dictionary,

and emoji was one of them in the top ten.

So I have a huge pulling towards saying emoji is the most recent one,

although I definitely know selfie's in there and I know glamping.

Retweet's bound... If tweet's in there, then retweet must be.

Twitter's been going since 2008,

and you could retweet when it first came online, so that's nine years.

-It's highly likely that went in before.

-Germaine, do you use emojis?

No!

-No, but you know what that means, right?

-Well, sort of.

I mean, I know they're little

face things and they look happy and they look sad.

I think, especially for birthdays and stuff like that,

people use emojis a lot, so I think it's definitely out there,

it's definitely in the dictionary,

and I'm feeling it would be the most recent.

-So if either of you feel any differently, tell me now.

-No.

-No?

So, we feel, according to the Oxford English Dictionary Online,

the word entered in the English language most recently is emoji.

So, Chris, quite a bit of logic there from the panel.

-What do you make of that?

-Yes, er, very interesting.

I think they spoke a lot of sense, and I think I agree with them,

-so I'll say emoji.

-OK.

You're agreeing with the panel, you're going for emoji.

For £200, the correct answer is...

-Retweet!

-..retweet!

-Goodness! Who would have thought it?

Retweet entered the English dictionary in 2007.

And emoji was the oldest.

It entered the English dictionary in 1997.

-What?!

-That's another £200 down the drain, as they say.

You didn't manage to bank anything for that question.

It means at the end of Round One, you're still on £200.

So, you've gone with our panel on a couple of questions,

you've gone against them on occasion.

-How do you think they're doing so far?

-Better than me.

-Awww!

-No, you're being very kind.

Let's see how they cope with pictures. It's time for Round Two!

OK, Chris, Round Two is our picture round.

You must place three pictures in the correct order.

There are three questions in this round. Each question is worth £300.

Maximum £900 for the prize pot.

-Ready to play?

-Yep.

-Here we go. Here's your first question.

How's your sporting knowledge?

Er, not too good. Erm, I do remember those events,

but which order they came in I'm not sure.

But no doubt our friends may know when the World Cup and

the Olympics took place, and so perhaps

they can give me a hint or two.

Absolutely, Chris, no doubt that

the panel can sort this out for you(!)

Your debate starts now.

Erm, nuclear physics would be preferable to this, to me!

I'm trying to work out how old my dog was when he died last year,

because his name was Michael, and he was called after Michael Owen.

So, how old was Michael when he died?

Did you get your dog when the World Cup was on? Can you remember that?

I can't remember what the intervals are between the World Cups.

It's 1990, '94 and '98.

They're your three choices.

I remember because World Cup '90, collecting the stickers at school.

-How old were you then?

-Er, that remains to be discovered.

My instincts would be to say Linford first,

Owen second and South Africa third.

When was Mandela released?

-I feel that was '95, '96.

-But also, we've got...

Where did Linford Christie win the 100 metres Olympic gold?

-Let's backtrack from the Olympic years.

-Are we talking Atlanta?

That's got to be '92, right?

-So are you thinking '94 or '98...?

-I'm thinking that.

I'm thinking '92. Don't know about that, but that's '98.

-That could be '99, though.

-Yeah, this is what I would think,

personally, because Owen was 16 when he first played for Liverpool. 17?

He was a young, young player, and he looks super-young there,

and I think that was before Francois Pienaar...

South Africa won the Rugby World Cup in South Africa, remember?

-So I feel that's the most recent.

-Yeah, I agree.

We, the panel, have put these sporting events

-in chronological order.

-We think.

Linford Christie, Michael Owen

and South Africa winning the Rugby World Cup.

-'92, '98...

-Well, I think Chris has got the answers, anyway.

-So, Chris?

-Tricky.

I'm not really sure.

I'm going to go for Linford Christie

first, Michael Owen second and, yes,

South Africa third, which is,

in fact, what they've said, as a matter of fact.

But not necessarily because they said it, but I think that is right.

So you're going to agree with the panel but not necessarily

because they said it.

LAUGHTER

-Well, let's hope you're both right.

-Absolutely!

-OK.

Here we go. Is that the correct order, for £300?

It's the wrong order!

Let's have a little look, Chris, at the correct order.

-Mandela in the middle.

-There you go!

Linford Christie won gold at the '92 Olympics in Barcelona,

then the South Africa World Cup was in 1995,

Michael Owen scored against Argentina in the 1998 World Cup.

He was aged 18.

And two years later, Germaine, you named your dog after Michael Owen.

He was a standard poodle.

And if you know standard poodles, you know why he got that name.

OK, Chris, no money added to your prize pot, but don't worry,

we still have two questions in this round.

Let's see if we can get the 600 quid up for grabs.

Here's your next question.

I know when Obama and Hollande were elected,

but I'm not sure about Angela Merkel at the moment.

That's the one you need a little bit of clarity on.

I do need a bit of clarity on that.

OK, panel, can you sort this out for Chris? Your debate starts now.

I feel the same as Chris.

I think we probably know about Barack and Francois.

Maybe it's the Angela question.

Germaine, can you enlighten us slightly on...

when she came into power?

I have the feeling that lots of people have,

that's she been around for ever...

erm, which is some doing,

considering what she's actually lived through.

And I think it goes Angela, Obama and Hollande.

So, in your opinion, Germaine, you would say...?

What year was Angela...?

That's the one Germaine's trying to help us with,

-because if we think 2008 for Barack Obama...

-It's before 2008, I think.

So you think she was before him and Francois was after him?

Definitely.

So, yeah, I'm just hoping we're getting this the right way round.

Angela Merkel was actually trained for the job by one of

the German chancellors. If I could remember which... Is it Helmut Kohl?

-Yeah.

-Oh, that's ages ago, then.

-Exactly.

That's why I said she'd been around for years.

Well then, if that's the case, then we stick with Angela being

-there first, Barack in the middle...

-I think she's about 2007, maybe.

OK, so what we shall do is, Chris, we have decided that the

order will be Angela Merkel, Barack Obama and Francois Hollande.

Chris, there was two that you were quite confident about,

one that you weren't sure about.

Has the panel managed to shed any light for you?

Yes, it's down to Angela Merkel, and I'm...

inclined to agree with them that she was...

..earlier than any of them,

so I'll go with the order that they have suggested.

OK, you're going with the panel,

you're saying Angela Merkel first elected, then Barack Obama,

then Francois Hollande. Is that the correct order, for £300?

It is correct! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Well done, sir!

Angela Merkel became the German Chancellor in 2005.

She was the first woman to hold the position.

Barack Obama was elected in 2008 but not sworn in until 2009.

Francois Hollande became President of France in 2012.

Well done, everybody, we've got there in the end.

That's another £300, Chris, taking your total up to £500.

OK, Chris, final question in the picture round.

Let's see if we can throw another £300 into your prize pot.

Here it comes.

Right! Well, they're in different parts of the world, are they not?

Erm, Bali is in Indonesia, I believe.

Saint Lucia, of course, is in the West Indies.

The Maldives, I'm not sure how far away that is.

Oh, dear! Well, once again I'm going to need a bit of help.

What you need is a well-travelled panel.

And I believe we are looking at such.

Guys, let's see if you can sort this out. Your debate starts now.

Great, well, we've got Indian Ocean, Indonesia and the Caribbean.

Can we just clarify which species of crow...?

Which species of crow goes on honeymoon to the Maldives?

It's quite a distance, you see.

Erm, well, the flight time to the Maldives is 9.5 hours.

-To Saint Lucia it's about seven to eight hours.

-Yeah.

The Maldives is just off of the Indian Ocean, to the south-west.

-You can fly directly there from Kerala. It's about two hours.

-Yeah.

-The Maldives is about ten hours.

-Yeah, it's nine to ten hours.

-Yeah.

St Lucia's somewhere between six and eight, I think. About seven.

And I'm pretty sure the flight time's about 11 hours to Bali.

So therefore you're in the same ball park as what I think Germaine

and myself would say -

Bali is the furthest as the crow flies from London.

I'm a bit worried about

the shortness of the flight to Saint Lucia.

-Yes. Fair comment.

-You're crossing the Atlantic.

-Yeah.

-It seems a bit short.

-You could be right there.

-Well, yes.

What we can definitely say is this is the furthest. Right?

-Are we all in agreement about that?

-We reckon.

-Bali's the furthest.

We will go with your hunch on this occasion, Russell.

I'm not saying that you're wrong,

I just didn't know that it was quite as short as that.

And we're going to go for the Maldives second.

So, our chosen order is Saint Lucia, Maldives and Bali.

OK, Chris, our panel have decided to ignore how that crow flies

and have gone with flight times.

Clearly, Russell is a complete expert in this, because...

--

-Oh, my God!

--

-..he travels everywhere!

--

-Famous last words!

--

-You've given

the exact times of all your flights.

I'm going to go with the panel

and say Saint Lucia, Maldives

and then Bali.

OK, you're going with the panel again.

For £300, is Saint Lucia, the Maldives and Bali the correct order?

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

Very well done! Very well played, Chris.

Saint Lucia is 4,230 miles as the crow flies from London,

the Maldives is 5,419 miles as the crow flies,

Bali in Indonesia the farthest, 7,761 as the crow flies.

Very well played, Chris. At the end of Round Two,

your prize pot is up to £800!

-So, Chris, end of Round Two. How's the panel faring?

-Very well!

-Whenever they've been wrong, I've been wrong, and vice versa.

-Mm.

Now, if you had to choose one for the Final Debate,

based on their performance so far...

We haven't got to that stage, have we?

-No, we haven't!

-Well, I'm not going to choose now.

-I'm thinking about it.

-LAUGHTER

OK, hold that thought, Chris. Let's play Round Three!

OK, Chris, in Round Three, you will face questions that contain

a statement about a person, a place or a thing.

Only one of those statements is correct.

We need you to find the correct one.

There's three questions in this round, each worth £500,

so lots of money to play for. Let's see if we can get your prize pot up.

Here comes the first question.

Right! Well, I think we all know he's the same age

as Queen Elizabeth II,

but he's either slightly older or slightly younger,

so I'll have to think about that.

I'm not sure about the Baftas or the species.

I know he's had many species named after him, but over ten seems a lot.

I'm sure Germaine will know all about this.

-No!

-OK, panel, let's see if you can sort this out for Chris.

Your debate starts now.

It might sound like an awful lot to have ten species named after

you, except that it goes right across the entire spectrum of

earthlings, and it could include all sorts of things - bacteria,

crustaceans...!

I know that I've seen them called attenboroughensis and stuff

-like that. I can't remember what.

-Attenboroughensis?!

Something like that. It's a mouse or ant named after him,

something like that. (A very quiet mouse.)

(You have to approach it softly.)

It seems highly likely it's the middle one for two reasons.

Number one, the Attenborough At 90 season is still on iPlayer,

I think, some of the stuff.

And he was on Graham Norton, being interviewed. That was very recently,

And the Queen's 90th feels a bit more distant than that.

No. No, no, no, the Queen was 90 the same year as him.

-No, no, but it feels like it was about a year ago.

-Oh. Oh.

She's older by about four or five months than him, maybe six.

It is inconceivable that he has never won a Bafta.

I know, and if he hasn't, I'm happy to stand by the fact that

he should have, and I'm believing that he has had one.

We should empty-chair the show.

Yes, and he should get one immediately if he hasn't.

-It's the middle one. Come on, guys.

-Germaine, what are you thinking?

Er, my instincts are having a dreadful time.

You were right first time, Germaine - the crustaceans,

the bacterias, the insects, the arthropoda. Come on!

OK, I'm going to go with my team-mates on this one,

and the panel have decided that it is true that David Attenborough

has over ten different species named after him.

-OK, Chris, we got an answer in the end.

-Mm-hm.

I have actually met David Attenborough,

because he lives very near me in Richmond.

Was he holding a Bafta or any of his species?

Species... Yes, he's pretty keen on the species.

The Queen's birthday is the 21st of April.

Her 90th, of course, was last year. And his 90th was last year,

but was it before or after April?

Yeah, I know the panel thinks it was after April, but, erm,

I'm not so sure.

I'm going to go against the panel and go for A, he IS older than

the Queen.

OK, disagreeing with the panel. The correct statement is...

-I hope we're wrong now.

-I hope we're wrong now.

Come on, Chris.

Sorry. I am wrong.

Germaine, your gut reaction at the beginning -

the species include wildflower, carnivorous plants, butterflies,

even a prehistoric creature called an attenborosaurus.

-Oh, it's probably what I was remembering.

-Well done!

Attenboroughensis.

David Attenborough and the Queen were both born in 1926.

Sir David was born on the 8th of May

so is two-and-a-half weeks younger than the Queen.

-Really, guys!

-I knew it was very close, but there we are.

-I got the wrong side.

-Sadly, Chris, no £500.

-Never mind.

There's still £1,000 up for grabs with our final two questions

in this round. Here's question two.

-RUSSELL:

-Ugh!

LAUGHTER

-Now, you did say musicals was one of your strong points.

-I did, yes.

I do know the musical. I could sing a couple of songs, but I won't.

-Oh, I think you probably should.

-No. No, no, no, no, I don't sing.

I don't think it won an Academy Award, but again,

I'm not absolutely sure.

I think I must rely on my colleagues over there.

OK, we will defer to the panel. Your debate starts now.

I love this film, as well. I actually don't know these

-statements!

-Musicals and sport, I have nothing. Really?

But I bet you've got an opinion on whether or not Henry Winkler

-can dance.

-RUSSELL LAUGHS

Funnily enough, Henry Winkler is my go-to lookalike fancy-dress Fonz.

I do my hair up, put the jacket on and do that.

But whether he was found for Happy Days by virtue of being on

Broadway, it's a story I want to believe...

No, he wanted to be the lead...

He was going to play the role John Travolta played, but he didn't.

I know there's a Henry Winkler connection to Grease.

Whether he played Danny...

I don't think it was an original Broadway production.

Hang on a second, he was singing and dancing

in the West End recently, in Les Mis, something like that.

-Oh, was he?

-I've seen him on the posters, giving it all that.

Does anyone speak Spanish, Italian, Latin? Anyone got anything?

I've got a little bit of Italian, a little bit of Spanish.

Vaselina is not grease in any language, I don't think.

-It's Vaseline!

-It's Vaseline.

You can be sure it doesn't come from a Latin or Italian or Spanish root?

Oh, no, but then, most of our words do come from somewhere there.

But, I mean, that could genuinely be the Spanish verb for "grease".

Yeah, but they won't change the words of the song to

"Vaselina is the word".

They've got to stick to the word "grease".

You'd be surprised, some of the amusing translations.

"Go, vaselina lightning." It's not going to happen, is it?

The one that's interesting me now is "The film won an Academy Award."

-Now, not all Academy Awards are for performance and for acting.

-Mm-hm.

-Music.

-Oh, I see what you mean.

It has to be one of the best scores, soundtracks, of any musical ever.

It had to be some strange muddle if it didn't win an award at

-that sort of level.

-That's a really good point, Germaine, actually.

Are we going to go for the Academy Award?

Are we going to go for the Academy Award?

-Go on.

-Come on, then.

-Be a devil.

We the panel believe that the musical Grease won an Academy Award.

-OK, Chris.

-Oh, dear! Erm, I'm going to discount A, I think.

It's a question between B and C.

I can't remember it winning an Academy Award, so, on

balance, Patrick, I'm going to go for B, Henry Winkler played Danny.

OK. Sunetra feels that there is a Henry Winkler connection to Grease.

Our panel went with "The film won an Academy Award".

For £500, the correct answer is...

GASPS IN AUDIENCE ..the film was released as Vaselina

-in countries such as Mexico.

-Russell, I take my hat off.

Henry Winkler turned down the role in the film playing the role

of Danny because he didn't want

to be typecast after playing... HE CLICKS HIS TONGUE

The Fonz! Ohhh!

The sad news, at the end of that question,

-I'm afraid we've got money, but it's not multiplying.

-No.

LAUGHTER

-Very good!

-I'm off! I'm off!

It's electrifying!

Chris, you've gone against the panel four times so far.

One more chance to put another £500 into your prize pot.

We're all going to wish you the best as we have

a look at the next question.

Hm! Well!

-The Great Fire of London, I think we all know, was 1666, wasn't it?

-Yes.

Oliver Cromwell, not as late as that, I think, but I'm not sure.

Valentine's Day, I've no idea. I don't remember reading about that.

Samuel Pepys did write about the fire in his diary.

Whether he mentioned a cheese I've no idea.

I'm sure that some of you will be able to help me on that, though.

Oh, I'm sure they will. LAUGHTER

Panel, your debate starts now.

Well, it doesn't occur during the protectorate of Oliver Cromwell.

That we know, because it's during the reign of Charles II.

Now, if the fire started on St Valentine's Day...

it's not my feeling that it was particularly cold.

I feel, for some reason, it was autumn.

I don't know why I feel it's autumn. Maybe I was...

It burnt quite fiercely, so that would suggest maybe it's not winter.

As for burying a cheese, Pepys is quite capable of burying a cheese.

And it sounds like the kind of entry that you would get in a diary.

It feels like it's one of those sort of random facts that might

travel through history and become

one of those sort of fond anecdotes, I suppose.

-Or fondue anecdotes.

-Oh, you're good.

Hot cheese! Come on! How many hot cheese jokes are there?

-You are on fire!

-Come on!

-You can always rely on Russell.

-Did you just say I'm on fire?

-I did.

Thank you. Should we go with Samuel Pepys and hope that Chris

has more of an inkling than we do, or do we feel that we want to go...?

-We're writing off Oliver Cromwell.

-Do you think it's Pepys and cheese?

It's so preposterous, isn't it,

that you'd bury a cheese to protect it from the fire?

-I seem to remember it.

-All right, let's go for it.

-OK.

-Let's take a punt.

-We the panel believe that Samuel Pepys buried

a cheese to protect it from the fire.

They believe it's preposterous,

but they have gone for the cheese, Chris.

Well, I think we've all discounted C, and I'm inclined to agree

with the panel this time and go for Samuel Pepys.

Final chance in the show to get the prize pot up. For £500, Chris,

you've gone with the panel.

Did Samuel Pepys bury a cheese to protect it from the fire?

The correct statement is...

Please be a cheese burier!

It's the correct answer! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

-Well done! Very well done.

-Thank you.

Pepys wrote in his diary that he buried his prize Parmesan

cheese as well as wine and some other things.

The fire started - you were right,

it was the autumn - the 2nd of September in 1666.

And Cromwell was from 1653 to 1658.

Chris, well played on that last question.

It means at the end of Round Three, the prize pot is up to £1,300.

APPLAUSE

So, it's a decent amount. Any plans if you win the money?

I expect I would probably go on a long trip, possibly to Costa Rica.

-Oh!

-Ooh!

-See a monocled bear.

-No, no, no!

-OK, Chris, in the Final Debate you'll face one question.

That question will have six possible answers.

Only three are correct. In order to win,

you're going to have to give me all three correct answers.

As before, though, you're not alone.

You must choose one of our panel to assist you.

So, based on their performance today, Chris,

who would you like to join you in the Final Debate?

Will it be big cheese Russell Kane,

will it be Deputy Chief Assistant Commander Sunetra Sarker or

will it be Germany Greer in the hope that

The Life And Times Of Michael Owen The Poodle comes up?

Well, it's difficult, but I'm going

-to choose Russell.

-Oh, my God!

Russell, would you join us as we play today's Final Debate?

OK, Russell, Chris has chosen you for the Final Debate.

I can't bear the thought of Chris trading in Costa Rica.

"It's Brighton again, dear."

-Don't worry about it!

-Absolutely no pressure, then...!

You've got two categories, because it is your Final Debate, Chris.

Have a look and choose one from these two.

What are you like with mythology? Have you done much...?

I did Classics, but it's so long ago I've forgotten it.

Have you done any Aristophanes, any Sophocles at the theatre?

-I know a bit about it, yeah.

-Good!

-But not Norse mythology.

-Not Norse mythology, no. Let's go Mythology.

-Mythology.

-Mythology!

-Yeah.

-OK.

-And try not to be a Thor loser if it is Norse.

OK, Chris, we're going to wish you the best of luck.

We're going to put 45 seconds on the clock.

£1,300 up for grabs.

Here comes today's Final Debate question on Mythology.

-Yes, winged horse.

-Shhh.

-Sorry.

Yep.

-Your time starts now.

-Right, Pegasus is a winged horse.

-Cupid is winged.

Cerberus is a three-headed dog.

-Minotaur is...

-Minotaur is a monster. Wouldn't have wings.

-It's got the bull's head.

-Nike is a shoe.

It's between Nike and Anansi.

-Cerberus is a dog.

-Cerberus is a dog, minotaur's a bull.

-Cupid's a little winged love dude.

-Pegasus is the horse.

-Well, Nike...

-Who's Anansi? I'm not sure who Anansi is.

-Nike is the god of...

-Was she winged?

-20 seconds.

-The sports logo would suggest winged.

-Mm.

-A winged helmet, maybe!

Yes, that's a good idea.

-I don't know who that Anansi is, I'm afraid.

-Ten seconds.

Well, you're going to have to guess Nike, Cupid, Pegasus,

-because we don't know who Anansi is.

-That's what I'm going to go for.

-I'm so sorry if it's not.

-No, no, you've done very well.

-That's what I would have gone for.

-Time up. I need three answers.

Pegasus. Nike. Cupid.

Pegasus, Nike and Cupid. For £1,300. We're wishing you the best of luck.

Here we go. First you said Pegasus. Is Pegasus a correct answer?

It is correct. APPLAUSE

You were right, it's a winged horse.

You then said Nike.

Was Nike correct, to keep us on track for £1,300?

It is a correct answer! APPLAUSE

-The Greek winged goddess of victory.

-Nike puts us "in the running".

LAUGHTER

So, it all boils down to Cupid.

If Cupid is correct, Chris, you win £1,300.

If it's wrong, I'm afraid you do leave with nothing. Here we go.

For £1,300, is Cupid a correct answer?

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

-Congratulations!

-Thank you!

-Congratulations,

Russell, congratulations, Chris.

£1,300. Give it up for Chris!

Well, that is it for Debatable.

There's just time for me to thank our fantastic panel,

Russell Kane, Sunetra Sarker and Germaine Greer.

I do hope you've enjoyed watching. We'll see you next time for more

heated debates. From me, goodbye.

CHEERING