Episode 5 Election Spy
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Transcript
| Line | From | To | |
|---|---|---|---|
As a Lib Dem I'd obviously prefer to suspend | :00:15. | :00:17. | |
well, after the election's over but the terrorists want that | :00:18. | :00:22. | |
so sod them and let's do | :00:23. | :00:24. | |
Too many late nights. I'm starting to have the conspiracy theories. I'm | :00:25. | :02:10. | |
worried. Where are you Ukip Councillor holds golly would go hen | :02:11. | :02:17. | |
night stories? You know Julian? No. No-one is pouring a bucket of sheet | :02:18. | :02:25. | |
over our heads. Doing brilliantly at the flag and rifle. My local. We're | :02:26. | :02:35. | |
at 2% in the polls. That's just the liberal elet. We're polling highly | :02:36. | :02:44. | |
in the 80-90 age bracket. It's good it's a short campaign. Because in | :02:45. | :02:47. | |
2015 we lost a few before polling day. Who is this Julian? No-one. In | :02:48. | :02:53. | |
times of national mourning you need one leader to bring the country | :02:54. | :02:55. | |
together. We are all united that he is a | :02:56. | :03:13. | |
complete twit. Yes, it would be fantastic to have President Trump | :03:14. | :03:14. | |
come over here and show solidarity. It is quite a busy week over here. | :03:15. | :03:26. | |
What with the general election and everything. No, no. It will be all | :03:27. | :03:32. | |
day on Thursday. Imagine a Labour-led coalition in charge of | :03:33. | :03:35. | |
Trident, Corbyn won't press the button, Nicola Sturgeon won't be | :03:36. | :03:39. | |
able to reach it. Leanne what's her name will only be able to fire it if | :03:40. | :03:44. | |
the instructions are in Welsh. Add the Greens will expect the missiles | :03:45. | :03:50. | |
to be recyclable. I'm not enthusiastic we do fire it. I always | :03:51. | :03:55. | |
imagined Nigel and me trapped underground in a nuclear bunker. | :03:56. | :03:59. | |
Well, you're not the only one. You'd actually do it? Yes, of course I | :04:00. | :04:05. | |
would. Under extreme circumstances, as Jeremy says. You have to do | :04:06. | :04:08. | |
what's necessary. You would push the button? I would. To call Diane | :04:09. | :04:14. | |
Abbott to go on Newsnight? Yes! Corbyn is calling on Theresa to | :04:15. | :04:19. | |
resign, utterly ridiculous, Grandstanding. Can we get Amber Rudd | :04:20. | :04:23. | |
elected leader by Wednesday? No. Oh, bustard. I don't think this about | :04:24. | :04:30. | |
the terrorist links works, you can't see it's him under the balaclava. | :04:31. | :04:37. | |
How about our mental health policy, Trident, the NHS, why does it always | :04:38. | :04:41. | |
have to be about Tim's views on gay sex. Can I just say we are one of | :04:42. | :04:47. | |
the gayest parties in the UK. We are, the SNP say that they are, but | :04:48. | :04:51. | |
they're actually really quite a straight party. Coincidentally I'm | :04:52. | :04:56. | |
sitting here with Brian who is himself very gay, he is. He has a | :04:57. | :05:01. | |
husband and everything. You should speak to him. I think Timothies that | :05:02. | :05:11. | |
gays are sinners, but he's perfectly happy for hell to sort it out. How | :05:12. | :05:17. | |
much more liberal can you get than that. Abortion on the other hand... | :05:18. | :05:21. | |
Sorry, there's a fire drill. | :05:22. | :05:22. |