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This programme contains strong language | 0:00:02 | 0:00:07 | |
-You know what this is about. -Morning? I have no interest in her. | 0:00:07 | 0:00:09 | |
I saw you wanking to her the other night! | 0:00:09 | 0:00:13 | |
Bev! Stop! You're on the wrong side! | 0:00:13 | 0:00:16 | |
No, Sean, YOU'RE on the wrong side! | 0:00:16 | 0:00:18 | |
That's not what I meant! | 0:00:18 | 0:00:20 | |
OK, you want to let it out? | 0:00:24 | 0:00:26 | |
Fine, let it out. Yeah, let it out. Ow. Ow. OK, stop letting it out. | 0:00:26 | 0:00:28 | |
Enough, letting it out! | 0:00:28 | 0:00:31 | |
If you want me to stop, | 0:00:36 | 0:00:39 | |
say "stop". | 0:00:40 | 0:00:42 | |
Stop. | 0:00:44 | 0:00:46 | |
-You smell like cinnamon. -Oh. | 0:01:58 | 0:02:01 | |
-It's Joey. -What? | 0:02:01 | 0:02:03 | |
When Friends was really hot, they got me to do this cologne called Joey. | 0:02:03 | 0:02:09 | |
-No. -Yeah. I even got to pick out the scent myself. | 0:02:09 | 0:02:13 | |
Turns out I don't have the most sophisticated nose. | 0:02:13 | 0:02:16 | |
Plus, the day we did it, I was really hungry. | 0:02:16 | 0:02:20 | |
Which is why you now smell like a cinnamon bun? | 0:02:20 | 0:02:22 | |
Hey, it is called Joey. | 0:02:22 | 0:02:24 | |
You know, just because you picked it, doesn't mean you have to wear it. | 0:02:24 | 0:02:29 | |
I know. I still kind of like it. | 0:02:29 | 0:02:32 | |
-It didn't sell for shit. -Shocking. | 0:02:32 | 0:02:34 | |
I've got boxes of it in the garage if you ever want some. | 0:02:34 | 0:02:37 | |
My mother uses it during the holidays as a bathroom spray. | 0:02:37 | 0:02:41 | |
-I thought you didn't want one. -Oh, yeah, I gave up. | 0:02:45 | 0:02:48 | |
I have to say I have a vague sense I am a terrible, terrible person. | 0:03:00 | 0:03:04 | |
In general, or because of this? | 0:03:04 | 0:03:06 | |
-Because of this. -OK... | 0:03:06 | 0:03:08 | |
Look, don't... | 0:03:18 | 0:03:20 | |
beat yourself up. OK? Stuff happens. | 0:03:20 | 0:03:26 | |
Stuff happens? | 0:03:26 | 0:03:28 | |
Yeah. Stuff happens. | 0:03:28 | 0:03:30 | |
We did it. We can't undo it. | 0:03:30 | 0:03:32 | |
What, are you going to unfuck me? | 0:03:32 | 0:03:34 | |
So, there you go. | 0:03:37 | 0:03:38 | |
Besides... | 0:03:41 | 0:03:43 | |
-why am -I -feeling bad? | 0:03:43 | 0:03:45 | |
-He did it first. -What? | 0:03:45 | 0:03:48 | |
Sean. With Morning. | 0:03:48 | 0:03:49 | |
Oh. | 0:03:49 | 0:03:51 | |
What? | 0:03:52 | 0:03:54 | |
No, no, keep not feeling bad. | 0:03:54 | 0:03:58 | |
What are you saying? | 0:03:58 | 0:03:59 | |
OK... Seany never did a thing with Morning. | 0:04:02 | 0:04:06 | |
-Right. -Believe me, I would know. | 0:04:06 | 0:04:08 | |
I did everything but unzip him and take it out. He wasn't interested. | 0:04:08 | 0:04:12 | |
I really, really need for that not to be true. | 0:04:14 | 0:04:17 | |
Hey, I'd be the first person he'd call if he made a move with her. | 0:04:17 | 0:04:20 | |
I'm telling you, he did nothing. | 0:04:20 | 0:04:23 | |
Oh, Jesus. You really mean that. | 0:04:25 | 0:04:27 | |
Oh, God. Oh, my God! | 0:04:27 | 0:04:30 | |
-Why didn't you tell me? -I tried. You didn't believe me. | 0:04:30 | 0:04:34 | |
Well, then you try again! You try until you convince me! | 0:04:34 | 0:04:36 | |
-Anything to stop me from doing the stupidest thing in my life! -Let me ask you something. | 0:04:36 | 0:04:40 | |
If I had convinced you he didn't do it, do you think there's a chance we'd have ended up here? | 0:04:40 | 0:04:45 | |
-Are you crazy? Course not! -Right. See, the "self cock block"? | 0:04:45 | 0:04:51 | |
Not my kind of move. | 0:04:51 | 0:04:52 | |
Oh, God. Oh, God. | 0:04:52 | 0:04:55 | |
What have I done? | 0:04:55 | 0:04:58 | |
Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God! | 0:04:59 | 0:05:02 | |
SHE SOBS | 0:05:09 | 0:05:11 | |
-'Front door ajar. Front door ajar.' -You know your front door's ajar. | 0:05:28 | 0:05:33 | |
I assumed you were somewhere over Newfoundland right now. | 0:05:40 | 0:05:42 | |
I listened to your messages. | 0:05:42 | 0:05:45 | |
All 47 of them. | 0:05:45 | 0:05:46 | |
Right. | 0:05:46 | 0:05:48 | |
I was thinking of making them into a one-man show. | 0:05:48 | 0:05:51 | |
I'd buy a ticket. | 0:05:51 | 0:05:52 | |
I erm... | 0:05:55 | 0:05:57 | |
I think I may have overreacted. | 0:05:57 | 0:06:00 | |
Maybe a tad. | 0:06:00 | 0:06:03 | |
I should have trusted you. | 0:06:03 | 0:06:05 | |
Would've been nice. | 0:06:05 | 0:06:07 | |
I'm sorry. | 0:06:07 | 0:06:10 | |
I'm just happy you're back. | 0:06:10 | 0:06:12 | |
-I'm so, so sorry. -Oh, please. | 0:06:16 | 0:06:19 | |
The worst that's happened is, you missed a bizarro lunch with Merc. | 0:06:19 | 0:06:22 | |
-Oh... I smashed up the hire car. -What? You all right? | 0:06:22 | 0:06:25 | |
I'm fine. Everything's fine. Well, no, except for the car, that's definitely not fine. | 0:06:25 | 0:06:29 | |
But that's the worst that's happened. | 0:06:29 | 0:06:31 | |
-You smell like cinnamon. -I had a bun. | 0:06:41 | 0:06:44 | |
All right, I'm only going to ask you out once. | 0:06:47 | 0:06:51 | |
And I don't want you to say yes, because the team is here. | 0:06:51 | 0:06:54 | |
-And I don't want you to say yes, because... -No. | 0:06:54 | 0:06:57 | |
-Say what now? -No. | 0:06:57 | 0:06:59 | |
OK, I didn't actually ask you yet, so technically this doesn't count as my "once". | 0:07:02 | 0:07:07 | |
Well, when you do, it's still going to be no. | 0:07:07 | 0:07:10 | |
This is punishing. | 0:07:10 | 0:07:11 | |
That's fine. We'll see. | 0:07:11 | 0:07:14 | |
Walk away. Just walk away. | 0:07:14 | 0:07:17 | |
I'll see you around, Ms McCutcheon. | 0:07:17 | 0:07:19 | |
Have a good day, Mr Lyman. | 0:07:19 | 0:07:21 | |
Children should not have to see that. | 0:07:23 | 0:07:25 | |
Shut up. | 0:07:25 | 0:07:28 | |
And cut! | 0:07:28 | 0:07:30 | |
And the Pucks! pilot is officially done! | 0:07:30 | 0:07:34 | |
It's a wrap. | 0:07:34 | 0:07:35 | |
Uh, excuse me. Bev and I | 0:07:43 | 0:07:45 | |
would like to say what a wonderful couple of weeks it's been. | 0:07:45 | 0:07:51 | |
Oh, oh! Yes, absolutely. | 0:07:54 | 0:07:56 | |
It really has been a little bit of heaven. | 0:07:56 | 0:07:59 | |
You've all done brilliant work. And may I also say thank you for making two foreigners feel very welcome. | 0:07:59 | 0:08:07 | |
So yes, so now we're off to the editing room to polish this gem. | 0:08:07 | 0:08:13 | |
-Hopefully the powers that be will let us come back and play together for years to come. -Hear, hear. | 0:08:13 | 0:08:19 | |
Walk away. Just walk away. | 0:08:37 | 0:08:39 | |
-I'll see you around, Ms McCutcheon. -Have a good day, Mr Lyman. | 0:08:39 | 0:08:43 | |
-Children should not have to see that. -Shut up. | 0:08:43 | 0:08:46 | |
Is it any better? | 0:08:56 | 0:08:58 | |
I don't know. | 0:08:58 | 0:09:00 | |
It's shorter. | 0:09:00 | 0:09:02 | |
So there's less of it. | 0:09:02 | 0:09:05 | |
Yeah. | 0:09:05 | 0:09:07 | |
Do we hand it in? | 0:09:07 | 0:09:10 | |
I suppose. | 0:09:10 | 0:09:12 | |
Maybe we're just too close to it. Maybe it's not so bad. | 0:09:12 | 0:09:15 | |
-Peter, what do you think? -I agree. | 0:09:15 | 0:09:18 | |
-Yeah? -It's shorter. | 0:09:18 | 0:09:20 | |
Why do all of our pilots suck? | 0:09:23 | 0:09:26 | |
I sit there, I watch them and it is just, it's just, it's incomprehensible. | 0:09:26 | 0:09:31 | |
This is the Hindenburg of development slates. | 0:09:31 | 0:09:35 | |
These pilots, they make me wish I had cancer again, just so I could tell people, "You think this is bad? | 0:09:35 | 0:09:41 | |
"I have cancer again!" | 0:09:41 | 0:09:43 | |
How the fuck did this happen? | 0:09:43 | 0:09:45 | |
Yo. Sunshine. | 0:09:45 | 0:09:46 | |
That is not a rhetorical question. | 0:09:46 | 0:09:48 | |
How the fuck did this happen? | 0:09:48 | 0:09:51 | |
I don't know. | 0:09:51 | 0:09:53 | |
You're the Head of Comedy. Why is none of your shit funny? | 0:09:53 | 0:09:56 | |
Some of my shit's funny, no? | 0:09:56 | 0:09:57 | |
No! | 0:09:57 | 0:09:59 | |
Well, comedy is very subjective. | 0:09:59 | 0:10:03 | |
Oh, is it? | 0:10:03 | 0:10:05 | |
Is it? Oh, so... so is it me? | 0:10:05 | 0:10:08 | |
Am I being too negative? | 0:10:08 | 0:10:10 | |
Well, please, someone, tell me the ones you like. | 0:10:10 | 0:10:13 | |
Can anyone come up with one goddamn show that we can put on in the fall? | 0:10:13 | 0:10:17 | |
Oh, come on. Somebody have the balls to say something. | 0:10:17 | 0:10:21 | |
I only have one and I'm doing all the talking. | 0:10:21 | 0:10:24 | |
Yes. Good. Go. | 0:10:24 | 0:10:25 | |
I kind of liked the talking dog show. | 0:10:25 | 0:10:30 | |
-You're fired. -Are... | 0:10:35 | 0:10:38 | |
-are you being funny? -You see, that's our problem. | 0:10:38 | 0:10:43 | |
No-one here knows what's funny! Go! | 0:10:43 | 0:10:46 | |
Get out of here. Now. | 0:10:46 | 0:10:48 | |
-Really? -Go! | 0:10:48 | 0:10:49 | |
'Goodbye.' | 0:11:25 | 0:11:26 | |
Erm, Roger, pen, please. | 0:11:27 | 0:11:29 | |
Anyone else? | 0:11:45 | 0:11:47 | |
Give me one pilot we've got that isn't totally repellent. | 0:11:47 | 0:11:50 | |
The dog was funny! | 0:11:50 | 0:11:53 | |
-All right... -I never thought the dog was funny. | 0:11:56 | 0:11:59 | |
All right people, you spent a year of your lives on these things. | 0:11:59 | 0:12:03 | |
For Christ's sake, defend your work. | 0:12:03 | 0:12:06 | |
We all thought the Debra Winger thing was pretty funny. | 0:12:06 | 0:12:08 | |
-She was funnier dying in Shirley MacLaine's arms. -Yeah, but that was a movie. | 0:12:08 | 0:12:13 | |
Oh, if I could fire you... | 0:12:15 | 0:12:17 | |
I still like Pucks! | 0:12:20 | 0:12:21 | |
No, it's not ground-breaking, | 0:12:21 | 0:12:24 | |
but it's fun. And the kids are cute, and Matt is really good. | 0:12:24 | 0:12:29 | |
I still like it. | 0:12:29 | 0:12:30 | |
I'm not going to fire you. But I do think less of you. | 0:12:30 | 0:12:34 | |
Look, we haven't even tested any of these things. | 0:12:34 | 0:12:38 | |
You don't know what people will respond to. | 0:12:38 | 0:12:41 | |
I'll be happy if they don't tear the fucking dials off the seats and throw them at the screen. | 0:12:41 | 0:12:46 | |
What am I supposed to tell New York? | 0:12:49 | 0:12:51 | |
It's good they haven't called, right? | 0:12:56 | 0:12:58 | |
If they'd called and said it was dead, then... | 0:12:58 | 0:13:01 | |
-the show would be dead. But no call means it's still alive. Right? -Wow. | 0:13:01 | 0:13:05 | |
-What? -Only you could see the positive in nothing. | 0:13:05 | 0:13:08 | |
I'm just saying, there's still hope. | 0:13:08 | 0:13:12 | |
-No? -Darling, don't take this the wrong way... | 0:13:12 | 0:13:13 | |
I don't care. | 0:13:13 | 0:13:15 | |
-Well, you care. -No. I don't. | 0:13:15 | 0:13:17 | |
We're going home. Home. | 0:13:17 | 0:13:20 | |
To proper tea and gentle irony. | 0:13:20 | 0:13:24 | |
To a place where no-one says, "Oh, my God, I love your accent". | 0:13:24 | 0:13:27 | |
I truly can't wait. | 0:13:27 | 0:13:29 | |
I hope it's raining. | 0:13:29 | 0:13:32 | |
PHONE RINGS | 0:13:32 | 0:13:35 | |
-Hello? -Hey, there. -It's Carol. -Hi, Carol. | 0:13:36 | 0:13:39 | |
-I'm just calling to wish you guys a good flight. -Thank you. | 0:13:39 | 0:13:42 | |
And... the show? The little show? | 0:13:42 | 0:13:45 | |
The television show? Any word on that? | 0:13:45 | 0:13:47 | |
-I liked it. -Oh, bollocks... | 0:13:47 | 0:13:49 | |
No, I really did. But... | 0:13:49 | 0:13:52 | |
it didn't screen so great over here at the network. | 0:13:52 | 0:13:55 | |
-Some people liked it more than others... -What about Merc? | 0:13:55 | 0:13:59 | |
He... was one of the others. | 0:13:59 | 0:14:01 | |
-It's not totally dead yet. -Yet. | 0:14:04 | 0:14:07 | |
Right now we're showing it to test audiences. Who knows? | 0:14:07 | 0:14:10 | |
Maybe real people will respond to it. | 0:14:10 | 0:14:13 | |
There are real people in LA? | 0:14:13 | 0:14:15 | |
No, no, no. We bus them in. | 0:14:17 | 0:14:19 | |
Well, thanks a lot for the call. We've still got a load of packing to do... | 0:14:19 | 0:14:24 | |
-BAD ENGLISH ACCENT: -Is that Charles and Camilla? | 0:14:24 | 0:14:26 | |
They're heading back to London tonight. | 0:14:26 | 0:14:28 | |
Oh, no! But I made porridge! | 0:14:28 | 0:14:32 | |
I'm going to miss that. | 0:14:32 | 0:14:34 | |
Haha... Listen, you guys, the pilot's terrific. | 0:14:34 | 0:14:37 | |
Great work. Everyone here loved it. | 0:14:37 | 0:14:40 | |
So does that mean you're picking it up? We're going to be on TV? | 0:14:40 | 0:14:45 | |
Uh, well we're still deciding. But you're totally in the mix. | 0:14:45 | 0:14:49 | |
We just have to see how everything shakes out. | 0:14:49 | 0:14:51 | |
I wish it were just up to me. | 0:14:51 | 0:14:55 | |
But, hey, no matter what, we're going to get you back here. | 0:14:55 | 0:14:59 | |
You guys are too good! | 0:14:59 | 0:15:01 | |
We got to do something together! | 0:15:01 | 0:15:04 | |
Why don't we do this together? | 0:15:04 | 0:15:06 | |
Fly safe. | 0:15:06 | 0:15:08 | |
-I'm sorry. -Oh, it's fine. | 0:15:14 | 0:15:17 | |
Hey, we had fun. | 0:15:17 | 0:15:18 | |
-No, you didn't. -No, I didn't. | 0:15:18 | 0:15:20 | |
We should let Matt know it's dead. | 0:15:20 | 0:15:22 | |
I was going to run over there and say goodbye. | 0:15:22 | 0:15:25 | |
-I assume you don't want to be part of that. -That would be no. -Yeah. | 0:15:25 | 0:15:28 | |
I feel like we let you down. | 0:15:38 | 0:15:40 | |
-Nah. -I do. | 0:15:40 | 0:15:42 | |
-We should have done better by you. -Hey, don't do that. | 0:15:43 | 0:15:48 | |
It's like your wife said, everything that made this show worse was totally my fault. | 0:15:48 | 0:15:53 | |
She told you that? When? | 0:15:53 | 0:15:56 | |
Uh, I don't know. | 0:15:56 | 0:16:00 | |
-On the stage, I guess. -I didn't realise you two were even speaking. | 0:16:00 | 0:16:03 | |
Oh, yeah. Now and then. | 0:16:03 | 0:16:05 | |
Just, like, you know, mean things. | 0:16:05 | 0:16:07 | |
-Huh. -Hey, don't you have a plane to catch? -Oh, yeah I should get going. | 0:16:10 | 0:16:14 | |
If we miss this flight, Bev will literally kill me. | 0:16:14 | 0:16:17 | |
And I literally mean literally. | 0:16:17 | 0:16:19 | |
Well, OK, man. | 0:16:22 | 0:16:24 | |
I really hope we can keep in touch. | 0:16:24 | 0:16:26 | |
-Totally. -Now, I know people always say that at the end of these things, but I mean it. This was... | 0:16:26 | 0:16:30 | |
this was | 0:16:30 | 0:16:32 | |
the best part of all this. | 0:16:32 | 0:16:34 | |
I agree. | 0:16:34 | 0:16:36 | |
I don't have that many guy friends, and this was... | 0:16:36 | 0:16:38 | |
Oh, Christ, I'm making a speech. | 0:16:38 | 0:16:40 | |
-Dude, you are. -Yeah, so, blah blah blah, blah blah blah... | 0:16:40 | 0:16:45 | |
Wow. That was some moving shit. | 0:16:45 | 0:16:48 | |
It was, wasn't it? | 0:16:48 | 0:16:50 | |
Well, me too. | 0:16:50 | 0:16:51 | |
Come here. | 0:16:51 | 0:16:52 | |
-What? -Hug me again. | 0:16:58 | 0:17:00 | |
OK, this might be why you don't have many guy friends. | 0:17:00 | 0:17:04 | |
-That was weird. -What's that smell? | 0:17:08 | 0:17:09 | |
-Your cologne or whatever it is. -Oh. It's called Joey, | 0:17:09 | 0:17:13 | |
from back when I was doing Friends. | 0:17:13 | 0:17:15 | |
It's very... cinnamon-y. | 0:17:15 | 0:17:16 | |
I know. My four-year-old says I smell like a candle. | 0:17:16 | 0:17:20 | |
It's it's it's... bizarre. The other day, Bev had the same smell. | 0:17:20 | 0:17:24 | |
Huh. Well, er... maybe she went to a candle shop. | 0:17:27 | 0:17:30 | |
Girls do like the candles. | 0:17:30 | 0:17:32 | |
-Hey, you want some? I got cases of it. -No, that's all right. | 0:17:32 | 0:17:35 | |
No, no, no, come on. A going away present, huh? | 0:17:35 | 0:17:39 | |
I never got the whole concept of celebrity scents. | 0:17:45 | 0:17:49 | |
I mean, why would anyone want to smell like me? Or Britney Spears? | 0:17:49 | 0:17:52 | |
Or Elizabeth Taylor? Have you seen her lately? That's what you want to smell like? | 0:17:52 | 0:17:57 | |
-Where's the Jag? -Oh, it's in the shop. I had a little accident. | 0:17:57 | 0:18:00 | |
-Oh, shit. What happened? -I... Uh... I hit a deer. | 0:18:00 | 0:18:03 | |
-Oh, my God. That's bloody dangerous. -Tell me about it, yeah. | 0:18:05 | 0:18:09 | |
I was just driving along, talking on the phone, all of a sudden I look up and there's this fucking deer coming | 0:18:09 | 0:18:13 | |
-at me in the wrong lane. -What's the right lane for a deer? -Oh, uh, | 0:18:13 | 0:18:16 | |
I meant, like, there's a deer in my lane. | 0:18:16 | 0:18:20 | |
-So I hit the brakes and turn, and the thing smashes into my side. -Christ. | 0:18:20 | 0:18:25 | |
-Yeah. -Were you all right? | 0:18:25 | 0:18:27 | |
-I was fine. Yeah. The side of the car was totally dented in. -And the deer? | 0:18:27 | 0:18:33 | |
It, uh, just got up and, | 0:18:36 | 0:18:39 | |
what, loped... | 0:18:39 | 0:18:41 | |
Do deers lope? They lope, right? | 0:18:41 | 0:18:44 | |
Well, it just loped away. | 0:18:44 | 0:18:47 | |
Lope. | 0:18:47 | 0:18:51 | |
-You all right? -Yeah, why? -You seem... -Well, you know. | 0:18:51 | 0:18:54 | |
-I'm just reliving it. -Right. Sure. | 0:18:54 | 0:18:57 | |
Bev was just in an accident, too. | 0:18:58 | 0:19:01 | |
Wow. You're kidding. | 0:19:01 | 0:19:03 | |
What, uh, what happened in hers? | 0:19:03 | 0:19:05 | |
I don't know. Um. | 0:19:05 | 0:19:07 | |
She never actually gave me the details. | 0:19:08 | 0:19:11 | |
Huh. Maybe it was the same deer. | 0:19:11 | 0:19:14 | |
Maybe... | 0:19:14 | 0:19:15 | |
Here we go. | 0:19:20 | 0:19:21 | |
Joey. | 0:19:21 | 0:19:23 | |
Look at this. | 0:19:31 | 0:19:33 | |
"How YOU smellin'?" | 0:19:33 | 0:19:35 | |
Gee, I wonder why we didn't sell any? | 0:19:35 | 0:19:38 | |
That is some bad... cologne... | 0:19:38 | 0:19:42 | |
slogan... writing... | 0:19:43 | 0:19:48 | |
Dude, say something. You're kind of freaking me out. | 0:19:51 | 0:19:53 | |
Actually, you're the one freaking me out. | 0:19:53 | 0:19:55 | |
Why's that? | 0:19:55 | 0:19:58 | |
Did you... | 0:19:58 | 0:20:00 | |
did you shag my wife? | 0:20:00 | 0:20:03 | |
What? | 0:20:03 | 0:20:05 | |
Did you shag my wife? | 0:20:05 | 0:20:07 | |
OK, first of all, "shag"? | 0:20:07 | 0:20:10 | |
I thought that was just from those Austin Powers movies. | 0:20:10 | 0:20:13 | |
Seriously, that's a real word? | 0:20:13 | 0:20:15 | |
-Oh, my God... -Well, I just never know with you guys. | 0:20:15 | 0:20:18 | |
With your "crumpets" and your "blimeys". | 0:20:18 | 0:20:20 | |
-What is a "blimey"? -Oh, for Christ's sake. | 0:20:20 | 0:20:22 | |
Grow some balls to go with that ridiculous cock and answer me. | 0:20:22 | 0:20:27 | |
Did. You. Shag. | 0:20:27 | 0:20:30 | |
My. Wife? | 0:20:30 | 0:20:33 | |
OK. All right, she totally started it. | 0:20:36 | 0:20:39 | |
OK, she was driving on the wrong side of the street... | 0:20:39 | 0:20:43 | |
So you fucked her?! | 0:20:43 | 0:20:44 | |
No, no, no! She smashed into me. | 0:20:44 | 0:20:48 | |
And she had a cut on her head. | 0:20:48 | 0:20:50 | |
So I brought her back here to take care of it. | 0:20:50 | 0:20:52 | |
Oh, yeah, you took care of it, all right. You son of a bitch! | 0:20:52 | 0:20:56 | |
How did this happen? She despises you. | 0:20:58 | 0:21:00 | |
Oh, you must have had to try so bloody hard. What a conquest. | 0:21:00 | 0:21:03 | |
What a triumph! | 0:21:03 | 0:21:05 | |
It wasn't like that! It wasn't hard! | 0:21:05 | 0:21:07 | |
It wasn't easy! | 0:21:07 | 0:21:09 | |
Jesus, I don't know what to say! I want to leave, but it's my house! | 0:21:09 | 0:21:13 | |
-How could you do this? -Um... | 0:21:13 | 0:21:16 | |
-Stuff happens? -Stuff happens? | 0:21:16 | 0:21:18 | |
Apparently. Look it was wasn't like something we planned! OK, believe me. | 0:21:18 | 0:21:22 | |
Your wife is the last woman in the world I would ever want to fuck! | 0:21:22 | 0:21:27 | |
Because she's your wife! | 0:21:27 | 0:21:30 | |
I'm not saying she's unfuckable! | 0:21:30 | 0:21:33 | |
Oh, God, I'm trying to apologise here! | 0:21:33 | 0:21:37 | |
I don't want your bloody apology! | 0:21:37 | 0:21:38 | |
Too bad. I'm sorry! | 0:21:38 | 0:21:42 | |
OK, I am so, so sorry. | 0:21:42 | 0:21:45 | |
I did a terrible thing. I get that. | 0:21:45 | 0:21:48 | |
I never meant to hurt you. | 0:21:48 | 0:21:49 | |
You fucking bastard. | 0:21:51 | 0:21:53 | |
Hey, what... what are you doing? | 0:21:53 | 0:21:55 | |
Calm down. Don't get crazy. | 0:21:55 | 0:21:58 | |
-Or what, you'll screw her again? -Hey, it wasn't just me, you know. | 0:21:58 | 0:22:01 | |
-How many were there? -No, I mean, she was there, too. | 0:22:01 | 0:22:04 | |
And this only happened because she was so pissed about you and Morning. | 0:22:04 | 0:22:08 | |
-There is no me and Morning! -I know! -So why didn't you tell her? | 0:22:08 | 0:22:11 | |
-I tried! -How hard? | 0:22:11 | 0:22:13 | |
Let's not focus on that! | 0:22:13 | 0:22:14 | |
Look, I said I'm sorry. | 0:22:14 | 0:22:19 | |
I don't know what else to say. | 0:22:19 | 0:22:21 | |
You're right. | 0:22:21 | 0:22:23 | |
-That's enough talking. -What are doing? Hey, put that down. | 0:22:23 | 0:22:27 | |
Are you crazy? You don't... | 0:22:27 | 0:22:32 | |
-Jesus! -Yeah? | 0:22:32 | 0:22:34 | |
Now how YOU smellin'? | 0:22:34 | 0:22:37 | |
Hey, stop! | 0:22:37 | 0:22:38 | |
Raaaargh! | 0:22:42 | 0:22:43 | |
It's nearly time to leave for the airport and you're not back yet. | 0:23:54 | 0:23:57 | |
I hope you're not still there. | 0:23:57 | 0:23:59 | |
If we miss this flight because you two | 0:23:59 | 0:24:02 | |
are skateboarding or rollerblading or some other ridiculous hijinks... | 0:24:02 | 0:24:07 | |
OK? Call me! | 0:24:09 | 0:24:11 | |
Mummy, that mean man is squashing my face. Someone call a bobby. | 0:24:13 | 0:24:20 | |
Fuck off! | 0:24:20 | 0:24:20 | |
R-a-a-a-a-a-a-ar! | 0:24:27 | 0:24:29 | |
Ah-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h! | 0:24:30 | 0:24:32 | |
Does it still sting? | 0:24:36 | 0:24:38 | |
-Of course it bloody stings. -Well, we should go to a hospital. | 0:24:38 | 0:24:42 | |
You mind using this one? Those are really just for show. | 0:24:42 | 0:24:44 | |
Oh, are they? | 0:24:44 | 0:24:46 | |
Come on. Let's go to the emergency room. | 0:24:48 | 0:24:50 | |
-No. -Don't be an asshole. | 0:24:50 | 0:24:52 | |
I don't need you to take me to hospital! | 0:24:52 | 0:24:54 | |
Why can't you guys say "the hospital" like normal people? | 0:24:54 | 0:24:58 | |
Piss off. Twat. | 0:24:58 | 0:25:00 | |
'Front door ajar.' | 0:25:06 | 0:25:09 | |
Whatever explanation you've got... Oh, my God! What happened? | 0:25:11 | 0:25:14 | |
-Don't touch me. -What? | 0:25:14 | 0:25:18 | |
-He knows! -What? | 0:25:18 | 0:25:20 | |
-Oh, Christ! -Yeah. Anyway, good luck... | 0:25:20 | 0:25:23 | |
No, wait, what do you mean he knows? How does he know? | 0:25:23 | 0:25:27 | |
He should be a fucking detective. | 0:25:27 | 0:25:28 | |
He just started finding all these little clues. | 0:25:28 | 0:25:31 | |
-That my car was gone. My cologne... -Well, you're wearing enough. | 0:25:31 | 0:25:34 | |
-He threw bottles of it at me! -Sean? | 0:25:34 | 0:25:35 | |
Uh, yuh. He was a fucking maniac. | 0:25:35 | 0:25:38 | |
I'm sorry. My depth perception is still a little wonky. | 0:25:45 | 0:25:49 | |
-What happened to your eyes? -Your lover tried to blind me. | 0:25:49 | 0:25:53 | |
-He had a cactus. -He's not my lover! | 0:25:53 | 0:25:55 | |
I swear, the thought that I was with him physically disgusts me. | 0:25:55 | 0:25:59 | |
I'm actually nauseated. It makes me want to vomit. | 0:25:59 | 0:26:01 | |
-All right... -I'm sorry. I'm sorry. | 0:26:01 | 0:26:03 | |
So fucking what? | 0:26:03 | 0:26:05 | |
I told you he was throwing shit. | 0:26:07 | 0:26:09 | |
I don't care that you're sorry. | 0:26:09 | 0:26:11 | |
That doesn't undo what you did. | 0:26:11 | 0:26:13 | |
Which was only because of the thing between you and Morning! | 0:26:13 | 0:26:16 | |
-There was no thing between me and Morning! -I didn't know that! | 0:26:16 | 0:26:19 | |
-He did! -Hey, this is between the two of you. | 0:26:19 | 0:26:21 | |
Actually, I don't think there is a "two of us". | 0:26:21 | 0:26:25 | |
Sweetheart, listen to me. I realise you feel that way now... | 0:26:25 | 0:26:28 | |
You have no idea how I feel. | 0:26:28 | 0:26:31 | |
Because if you did, that would imply you had a grain of empathy in your body. | 0:26:32 | 0:26:39 | |
And if that were the case... | 0:26:39 | 0:26:41 | |
you wouldn't have casually destroyed | 0:26:41 | 0:26:45 | |
the one thing that means anything to me. | 0:26:45 | 0:26:49 | |
-Man... -What? | 0:26:51 | 0:26:53 | |
The way you guys fight. | 0:26:53 | 0:26:55 | |
We're like, "Fuck you!", "Fuck you!". | 0:26:55 | 0:26:58 | |
I'm sorry, go on... | 0:27:00 | 0:27:02 | |
-I look at you and I can't see the woman I've been with for the last eight years. -She's still here. | 0:27:02 | 0:27:07 | |
She just went mad for a little bit. | 0:27:07 | 0:27:09 | |
I'd expect this from him. He's a bloody animal without a moral compass. | 0:27:09 | 0:27:13 | |
You're my partner. | 0:27:13 | 0:27:16 | |
You're the one person in the whole world | 0:27:16 | 0:27:20 | |
-I thought I could trust. -You can. | 0:27:20 | 0:27:22 | |
I love you. | 0:27:22 | 0:27:25 | |
When we get home, I'm out. | 0:27:28 | 0:27:30 | |
No... | 0:27:30 | 0:27:32 | |
I don't see how we can move past this. | 0:27:34 | 0:27:36 | |
Not to get too melodramatic, but I think | 0:27:38 | 0:27:42 | |
you've broken my heart. | 0:27:42 | 0:27:44 | |
PHONE RINGS | 0:27:49 | 0:27:54 | |
My agent. | 0:27:56 | 0:27:59 | |
Listen, I can't talk right now, I'm kind of in the middle of... | 0:27:59 | 0:28:02 | |
When? | 0:28:03 | 0:28:06 | |
No. | 0:28:06 | 0:28:07 | |
Have you guys heard anything from the network? | 0:28:07 | 0:28:09 | |
-What? -PHONE RINGS | 0:28:09 | 0:28:12 | |
Wow. Pick it up, pick it up! | 0:28:12 | 0:28:16 | |
-Hello? -We're a hit! | 0:28:18 | 0:28:21 | |
-What? -The test audiences loved Pucks! | 0:28:21 | 0:28:24 | |
Loved it? They fucking dry humped it! | 0:28:24 | 0:28:27 | |
It tested through the roof! | 0:28:27 | 0:28:28 | |
Both women and men! | 0:28:28 | 0:28:30 | |
87% said they'd watch it again. | 0:28:30 | 0:28:32 | |
Nobody gets numbers like that! | 0:28:32 | 0:28:34 | |
They loved everything with Matt and the boys. | 0:28:34 | 0:28:36 | |
They were totally invested in the relationship with Matt and Morning. | 0:28:36 | 0:28:39 | |
-Did I not tell you that this was the one? -That, that was you. | 0:28:39 | 0:28:43 | |
Wait. | 0:28:43 | 0:28:44 | |
-What are you saying? -I'm saying unpack those bloody bags! | 0:28:44 | 0:28:49 | |
You've got some telly to make! | 0:28:49 | 0:28:50 | |
Woo-hoo! Yeah! | 0:28:50 | 0:28:52 | |
Woo-hoo! | 0:28:58 | 0:29:00 | |
Huh... yeah? | 0:29:02 | 0:29:04 | |
Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd | 0:29:29 | 0:29:32 | |
E-mail [email protected] | 0:29:32 | 0:29:35 |