Episode 6 Gavin & Stacey


Episode 6

Similar Content

Browse content similar to Episode 6. Check below for episodes and series from the same categories and more!

Transcript


LineFromTo

-We should last till tomorrow.

-You mean the Calor Gas or our relationship?

0:00:010:00:04

-Why are you being like this?

-Why are you sleeping with another man?

0:00:040:00:08

-I gotta be civil to him.

-We're getting married in three weeks, when will you start putting me first?

0:00:080:00:12

We should set a date, like the end of the year,

0:00:120:00:14

and if nothing's happened by then then we'll just have to accept it ain't going to.

0:00:140:00:18

-and start looking into adoption and things?

-Yeah.

0:00:180:00:21

Well, I can't believe it. In three weeks you'll be married, eh, Ness?

0:00:210:00:25

-I know.

-Nessa and David.

0:00:250:00:27

ALL: Nessa and David.

0:00:270:00:28

It was really weird going back there. It was exactly the same.

0:00:310:00:35

-Remember Dougie?

-Doughnut Dougie? Dougie Doughnuts?

0:00:350:00:37

-He's had a heart attack. No-one told me.

-Oh, my God. Is he dead?

0:00:370:00:40

I think so. Nobody seems to really know.

0:00:400:00:42

Ohh. Do you miss it? Do you wish you still worked there?

0:00:420:00:45

Do you know what? Not at all. I really don't.

0:00:450:00:48

-I won't have to come up again for ages. Probably not for another six months.

-'Oh, that's good.'

0:00:480:00:51

It's like the olden days, this, isn't it?

0:00:510:00:54

Me down here, you up there.

0:00:540:00:56

-It's only one night.

-'I know that.'

0:00:560:00:58

I just mean it's like it used to be when we first met.

0:00:580:01:01

Yeah. God, all them phone calls.

0:01:010:01:03

-And the phone sex.

-That was good, though, wasn't it?

0:01:030:01:05

-Yeah.

-What you wearing?

0:01:050:01:07

So you going out with Smithy later, then?

0:01:090:01:10

-I don't know. Maybe. It won't be a late one.

-Don't get drunk now!

0:01:100:01:14

You've got to drive back in the morning.

0:01:140:01:16

I'll be home by midday. It's not starting till 3.00, is it?

0:01:160:01:18

I know, but you've got to put your suit on and your shoes and belt and everything.

0:01:180:01:22

-How's Nessa feeling?

-She's all right.

0:01:220:01:24

We're just having a girly night in with Bryn.

0:01:240:01:26

You know, bleaching and shaving and general wedding prep.

0:01:260:01:29

I just can't believe she's getting married. Can you?

0:01:290:01:32

Less than 24 hours to go now, babe.

0:01:320:01:34

Right. That's the base coat. Let that dry a minute.

0:01:440:01:47

Now, are you sure you want them black?

0:01:470:01:50

-Yeah. It's stylish.

-Is it, though? I mean...

0:01:500:01:52

Oh, Stace. Stop stressing me out.

0:01:520:01:54

I think what Stacey means, Ness, is it's not very bridal.

0:01:540:01:58

-Well, I'm not very bridal.

-Oh, yes, you are.

0:01:580:02:00

I tell you what. Why don't we paint the toenails black?

0:02:000:02:04

That way you retain a certain sense of individuality,

0:02:040:02:07

a sense of "Ness-ness".

0:02:070:02:09

But you keep it hidden away.

0:02:090:02:11

No. Stick to the plan, Bryn.

0:02:110:02:13

I want "Nessa" painted on my left foot, "David" on the right.

0:02:130:02:16

But you always call him "Dave". You never call him "David".

0:02:160:02:19

I do when he's sucking my toes.

0:02:190:02:21

There we are. All done.

0:02:220:02:25

-Oh, Mum. That looks lush.

-That looks lovely, Gwen.

0:02:250:02:27

-What shoes will you wear with it?

-What?

0:02:270:02:29

Joking, I am.

0:02:290:02:32

Oh, right.

0:02:320:02:34

-Are you sure you don't want to try it on?

-No need. If you got the measurements right it'll be fine.

0:02:340:02:39

If not, you'll ruin my day. Simple as.

0:02:390:02:41

What?

0:02:490:02:50

It's just so nice having you here without Stacey.

0:02:500:02:53

-Pam!

-Mum!

0:02:530:02:54

Not like that. I love Stacey.

0:02:540:02:57

It's just... Oh, I don't know. I just feel I've got you back all to myself.

0:02:570:03:01

Just for tonight.

0:03:010:03:02

There's my little prince, my handsome king

0:03:020:03:04

and me in the middle, the Duchess of Cornwall.

0:03:040:03:07

Oh, yeah. And here comes the court jester.

0:03:070:03:09

-What's that?

-Nothing.

0:03:090:03:11

Right. I am done.

0:03:110:03:13

BOTH: Romeo Dunn.

0:03:130:03:15

I should think so. It's quarter to eight.

0:03:150:03:17

-He didn't start till 4.00.

-How come?

0:03:170:03:19

Slept in. Didn't wake up till 3.30.

0:03:190:03:21

What were you doing last night?

0:03:210:03:22

Playing Rock Band with Rudi. It's amazing.

0:03:220:03:24

We're thinking about forming a proper band - a group.

0:03:240:03:27

I've done your dinner, sweetheart. It's in the oven.

0:03:270:03:29

- Cheers. I can get it. - You sure you don't want any veg?

0:03:290:03:32

I had a banana earlier, so I'm all right.

0:03:320:03:34

I'm going to get a bath and a face pack, ready for tomorrow.

0:03:340:03:38

-Yeah, we'll clear this up.

-It's a shame you're not going to be there, Smithy, at the wedding.

0:03:380:03:43

- Is it? - Well, yeah.

0:03:430:03:45

It doesn't feel right somehow. What are you gonna do with yourself?

0:03:450:03:48

I'll pick up Neil, my boy, and take him to Jungle Jim's.

0:03:480:03:50

You know, the kids' play centre thing.

0:03:500:03:52

-Bit young for that, isn't he?

-Nah, I checked it out on Monday.

0:03:520:03:54

They've got a little preschool bit, you know - soft toys, little train.

0:03:540:03:57

It'll be nice.

0:03:570:03:59

What? Have I got a bogey?

0:04:020:04:05

No, darling. You're fine.

0:04:050:04:07

So it's right, together. Left, together.

0:04:100:04:15

Right, together. Left, together.

0:04:150:04:18

OK. You have a go.

0:04:180:04:21

-No, no, no. Not like that.

-You're going too fast!

0:04:280:04:30

You're not doing "together," only "right, left".

0:04:300:04:32

I don't see the point. Why am I stopping for?

0:04:320:04:36

I never walks like that. I'm going from A to B, that's all.

0:04:360:04:38

Why've I got to look like a dick?

0:04:380:04:40

Well, I don't think you do look like a dick, Ness.

0:04:400:04:42

Well, I feels like a dick, Bryn.

0:04:420:04:43

- Hola! - Hiya, love.

0:04:430:04:46

Sorry it took so long. It was packed in Morrisons.

0:04:460:04:49

Always is on a Friday, Jase. A lot of people doing their big shop.

0:04:490:04:52

I won't go near the place on a Friday.

0:04:520:04:54

Me neither. Won't give them the satisfaction.

0:04:540:04:56

Where do you shop in Spain, Jase? Do they have supermarkets out there?

0:04:560:04:59

Yeah, it's Spain, not the Third World.

0:04:590:05:02

Oh, Jase, enough jibber-jabber.

0:05:020:05:03

It's meant to be my hen night. What's the plan?

0:05:030:05:05

Well, I'm doing pizzas and garlic bread.

0:05:050:05:08

And I've got us a little film.

0:05:080:05:10

It's a new thriller

0:05:100:05:12

starring two-time Academy Award-winner Mr Kevin Spacey.

0:05:120:05:16

Cracking.

0:05:160:05:17

TV: Cooking doesn't get tougher than this.

0:05:170:05:20

DOORBELL RINGS Oh, my Christ. Who's that?

0:05:200:05:23

-I'll get it.

-I don't know, do I?

0:05:230:05:26

-Yes, Rudi Rudester.

-All right, Gav? Is he here?

0:05:270:05:30

-Yeah, yeah. Smithy, it's Rudi.

-Invite her in. Come in, Ruth.

0:05:300:05:34

No, you're all right, Pam. I forgot my keys.

0:05:340:05:37

I thought Mum was home tonight.

0:05:370:05:38

She is, but she's not answering. I think she's asleep.

0:05:380:05:41

I'll give you a lift in a bit if you want.

0:05:410:05:42

No, I'm fine. I've got my heelies.

0:05:420:05:45

-Sure you won't stay for a drink?

-No, I'm fine, thanks, Mick.

0:05:450:05:47

I would come out to see you, Ruth, but I'm doing a face pack -

0:05:470:05:51

lavender and jasmine.

0:05:510:05:54

-Nice. OK. Well, I'll see you later.

-Take it easy, Rudi.

0:05:540:05:57

-Oh, my God. You were right.

-What?

0:05:570:06:01

-You are Welsh.

-Eh?

0:06:010:06:04

Your accent - you're speaking Welsh.

0:06:040:06:05

-What you on about?

-(MIMICS) What you on about?

0:06:050:06:07

-Shut up.

-(MIMICS) Shut up. You're a traitor.

0:06:070:06:10

You've betrayed your roots. You'll be playing rugby next.

0:06:100:06:13

-Told you!

-See you later.

0:06:130:06:15

-Did you get a card?

-What?

0:06:150:06:17

-For Nessa.

-Yeah.

0:06:170:06:19

-Cool. See you, Gethin.

-HE LAUGHS

0:06:190:06:21

-Got a card for Nessa?

-Yeah, why?

0:06:210:06:23

Nothing.

0:06:230:06:25

I really don't understand why you've got to have Neil tomorrow.

0:06:250:06:29

What?

0:06:290:06:31

Yeah. Why doesn't Nessa want the baby at the wedding?

0:06:310:06:33

I dunno. She watched her own mother get married nine times or something.

0:06:330:06:36

-To three different men.

-Oh.

0:06:360:06:39

-Ohhh.

-Oh, I see.

0:06:390:06:41

TV: 'Not ready for it to stop yet, but I'm afraid it's going to have to.'

0:06:410:06:44

Do you want to go out? Chinese and Budgie are down at the Stag.

0:06:440:06:47

They have a DJ on Friday and Saturday nights now.

0:06:470:06:49

-Nah.

-Oh, come on. Come out.

0:06:490:06:52

Get your groove on, yeah?

0:06:520:06:55

Ooh. That feels good.

0:06:550:06:59

Get on down at the Stag and Hound...

0:06:590:07:02

Cos Stacey's away, them mice gonna play.

0:07:020:07:05

-What are you doing?

-I don't know. Let's not bother.

0:07:050:07:08

DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ON TV

0:07:080:07:11

So he was Keyser Soze the whole time?

0:07:110:07:14

Yeah. And he didn't really have a limp at all.

0:07:140:07:17

-He was putting it on.

-That's very clever.

0:07:170:07:20

Very clever.

0:07:200:07:22

How do they think these things up, Gwen?

0:07:220:07:24

-I know. They just do.

-Yeah.

0:07:240:07:28

I've seen it three times now. I still didn't think it was gonna be him.

0:07:280:07:31

He's a good bloke, Kev. I've got a lot of time for him.

0:07:310:07:34

-He loved you, didn't he, Stace?

-Yeah.

0:07:340:07:37

But imagine if I'd married him. I'd have been Stacey Spacey.

0:07:370:07:39

ALL CHUCKLE PHONE RINGS

0:07:390:07:42

-On that note, I'm gonna turn in. Jase, you coming over now?

-Yeah, OK.

0:07:420:07:45

Hello? Oh, hiya, Dave. How are you feeling?

0:07:470:07:50

..Yeah, I'll get her now.

0:07:500:07:52

-Ness, it's Dave.

-What's he want?

0:07:520:07:54

-He wants to talk to you.

-Ask him what he wants.

0:07:540:07:57

What was it you wanted, Dave?

0:07:580:08:00

He says he's missing you, sugar tits, and wants to hear your lovely voice before you become his bride tomorrow.

0:08:030:08:09

Fair play. Hand him over.

0:08:090:08:11

All right, Dave? How's it going? All right?

0:08:120:08:15

All right, Ness. How's it going? All right?

0:08:150:08:17

Oh, Gwen, give us a minute.

0:08:170:08:19

Of course, love.

0:08:190:08:20

My old man there yet?

0:08:220:08:24

Yeah, just having a little game of cards with him and Noel.

0:08:240:08:27

-Cracking.

-Pass the phone a minute.

0:08:270:08:29

Hiya, Ness. How's my little girl?

0:08:310:08:33

-Who's this?

-It's your dad.

0:08:340:08:37

All right, Dad? What's occurring?

0:08:370:08:39

I'm good. I just come up. Been doing a stint on Holby. Man in a coma.

0:08:390:08:42

-Ah. That's an easy one.

-Yeah.

-They seemed happy with what I'd done.

0:08:420:08:46

I kept it simple, you know? Just lay there.

0:08:460:08:48

-Nice.

-So, how you feeling about tomorrow?

0:08:480:08:51

Terrible. Nervous as shit.

0:08:510:08:52

I'd be nervous marrying him. The man's got blood on his hands.

0:08:520:08:56

Listen, I'll hand you back to him. See you tomorrow, sugar tits.

0:08:560:08:58

Here he is.

0:08:580:09:00

Only joking, Dave. I know they never proved nothing.

0:09:000:09:02

You all right, babe? What are you nervous about?

0:09:040:09:06

-Oh, this and that. Mainly Gwen.

-Oh, what's she done now?

0:09:060:09:10

Well, she's finished the dress, like, but she won't do a fitting.

0:09:100:09:12

Christ knows what I'll look like tomorrow.

0:09:120:09:14

You'll look like an angel whatever you wears.

0:09:140:09:17

I'm gonna go now. Bye.

0:09:170:09:18

-'Whoa! Hang on a minute.'

-What?

0:09:180:09:21

-This time tomorrow you'll be my wife.

-I know. I can't wait.

0:09:210:09:25

Sweet dreams, Miss Jenkins.

0:09:250:09:27

You too, Mr Coach.

0:09:270:09:30

Ooh! Sorry. Is that you, Ness?

0:09:340:09:37

-STACEY: No, it's me, Mum.

-All right, love? Want a cuppa?

0:09:370:09:40

Yeah, OK. I'll be down now.

0:09:400:09:43

Oh, giving you gyp, is it, love?

0:09:480:09:49

No. It's just a bit stiff in the mornings.

0:09:490:09:52

Oh! That's what Trevor used to say.

0:09:520:09:54

Don't cheapen yourself, Gwen. You're better than that, come on.

0:09:540:09:57

Sorry, love.

0:09:570:09:58

You knocking me up an omelette for the journey, like?

0:09:580:10:01

Of course. I've got some onion, bit of ham.

0:10:010:10:02

-You can have cheese, tomato...

-Oh, Gwen, cut the chatter.

0:10:020:10:06

I've got other things on my mind, like my forthcoming nuptials.

0:10:060:10:09

-Sorry, love.

-That's OK.

0:10:090:10:11

I'll take the ham. Genuine.

0:10:110:10:14

Where've you been? I've been calling.

0:10:140:10:16

I'm sorry. I was just in the shower.

0:10:160:10:18

-Why haven't you left yet?

-I'm just leaving now.

0:10:180:10:20

It's only 8.30. Mum, have you seen my keys?

0:10:200:10:22

-Mum?

-Sorry, darling?

0:10:220:10:24

It's all right. I've got them.

0:10:240:10:26

Well, don't be long. I just want to see you, that's all.

0:10:260:10:29

I'm on my way.

0:10:290:10:30

Ohhh, Ness! It's all so exciting! Isn't it, Mum?

0:10:330:10:37

-What's that, love?

-Good morning, one and all.

0:10:370:10:40

-Especially the blushing bride.

-All right, Bryn?

0:10:400:10:43

-Hiya. You sleep OK on that sofa?

-Like a log.

0:10:430:10:47

-Right. We ready, then?

-Madam, your carriage awaits.

0:10:480:10:51

Or should I say Picasso?

0:10:510:10:52

There you are, love.

0:10:520:10:54

-Cheers, Gwenno.

-Oh, Ness. It's going to be immense.

0:10:540:10:58

-Are you excited?

-I am, yeah.

0:10:580:11:00

It feels very emotional.

0:11:000:11:02

Come on, Bryn, let's hit the road.

0:11:050:11:06

MUSIC: "Up All Night" by Take That

0:11:060:11:10

HE SINGS ALONG: # Cos you're keeping me up all night... #

0:11:120:11:15

HE TOOTS HORN

0:11:200:11:25

HE TOOTS HORN Hey-hey!

0:11:260:11:31

All right? All right?

0:11:310:11:33

SMITHY SPEAKS INAUDIBLY

0:11:330:11:38

Can't hear you!

0:11:380:11:40

PHONE RINGS

0:11:460:11:48

-Gavlar! Hey-hey!

-All right?

0:11:480:11:51

-You stopping at Leigh Delamere?

-I wasn't going to.

0:11:510:11:54

-Where you stopping?

-I don't normally. I go straight through.

0:11:540:11:57

What, not even at Chieveley? You don't stop at Chieveley?

0:11:570:11:59

-No.

-Chieveley's the best. It's insane.

-I've never been.

-It's great!

0:11:590:12:03

-I took Lucy there for dinner once.

-And you wonder why she left you(!)

0:12:030:12:06

Come on. Stop at Leigh Delamere. You'll get to see Neil.

0:12:060:12:09

OK. Just for five minutes.

0:12:090:12:12

In a bit.

0:12:120:12:13

Hey, hot dog!

0:12:210:12:23

Bryn burger!

0:12:230:12:24

How you doing?

0:12:240:12:26

Ohhh! Ho, ho, ho!

0:12:260:12:30

And who's this little nugget? What a treat!

0:12:300:12:33

We just passed each other on the motorway. How are you, Ness?

0:12:330:12:36

-Tidy.

-We had a lovely run down.

0:12:360:12:38

-I just stopped at Leigh Delamere.

-Takes her mind off the big day.

0:12:380:12:41

I saw Smithy and thought...

0:12:410:12:42

I'll be literally five minutes and then I'm heading off again.

0:12:420:12:46

OK.

0:12:460:12:47

Love you.

0:12:470:12:48

All right?

0:12:480:12:50

Yeah.

0:12:500:12:51

I've got a couple of changes of clothes in there for him.

0:12:510:12:54

-Yeah?

-And his special blanket.

0:12:540:12:56

Oh, you've got your special NuNu blanket!

0:12:560:12:59

Have you got your NuNu?

0:12:590:13:01

He's not been sleeping well the last few nights,

0:13:010:13:03

so you may want to stay with him till he gets off.

0:13:030:13:05

Yeah. Yeah, course.

0:13:050:13:07

-What are you gonna do with him?

-Oh, just hang out and stuff.

0:13:070:13:10

Me and Rudi will take him to Jungle Jim's.

0:13:100:13:12

We're gonna have fun, aren't we?

0:13:120:13:14

Come on, then, little fella.

0:13:180:13:20

Come have a holiday with your daddy, eh?

0:13:200:13:22

We'll be back next week.

0:13:220:13:24

And I've put his mobile in there,

0:13:240:13:26

so get him to give me a ring, just so I can hear his voice.

0:13:260:13:28

Yeah, of course. We'll be fine, you know. We'll be fine together.

0:13:280:13:33

I know.

0:13:330:13:34

Well, all the best for today. Got good weather for it.

0:13:340:13:38

I've got you something, actually, in the car.

0:13:380:13:40

Sorry - Bryn, will you take...

0:13:400:13:42

It's not anything big or nothing. It's just...

0:13:490:13:52

Oh. Cheers.

0:13:520:13:54

Thanks.

0:14:050:14:06

I ain't got one of just me and him, so, er...

0:14:060:14:10

Look, when you get back, we'll work out some kind of routine, you know?

0:14:100:14:15

Bit more of a structure to everything, now that you and Dave are getting married.

0:14:150:14:19

He's not replacing you or nothing, you know - Dave.

0:14:190:14:23

I never thought he was.

0:14:230:14:25

No. There's only one of you, isn't there?

0:14:250:14:31

Have a good one.

0:14:390:14:41

-Cheers, Bryn.

-Oh! There you go.

0:14:420:14:44

-Drive safe.

-Right, Gav, see you there.

0:14:440:14:47

Ness, let's get you home and get you married.

0:14:470:14:50

See you.

0:14:500:14:52

ENGINE STARTS

0:14:530:14:55

-You all right, mate?

-Yeah, I'm good.

0:14:590:15:01

-I'm gonna get a tea. Do you want...

-No, I can't.

0:15:010:15:04

-I really got to get back.

-PHONE RINGS

0:15:040:15:07

-Babe, I'm getting in the car right now.

-Just go. Go on.

-I know.

0:15:070:15:10

I really was only five minutes.

0:15:100:15:12

Yeah, OK, but I don't see what the rush is.

0:15:120:15:14

We got loads of time. Nessa's only just left.

0:15:140:15:17

-OK.

-..See you, mate.

0:15:170:15:19

ENGINE STARTS

0:15:190:15:21

MUSIC: "You Got The Love" by Florence and the Machine

0:15:210:15:24

# Sometimes I feel like throwing my hands up in the air

0:15:240:15:27

# I know I can count on you

0:15:270:15:31

# Sometimes I feel like saying, "Lord, I just don't care"

0:15:310:15:35

# But you got the love I need to see me through

0:15:350:15:40

# Sometimes it seems the going is just too rough

0:15:400:15:44

# And things go on no matter what I do

0:15:440:15:49

# Now and then, it seems like life is just too much

0:15:490:15:53

# But you got the love I need to see me through

0:15:530:15:56

# When food is gone, you are my daily meal

0:15:560:16:03

# Oh

0:16:030:16:06

# When friends are gone I know my saviour's love is real

0:16:060:16:12

# You know it's real

0:16:120:16:15

# You got the love You got the love... #

0:16:150:16:19

-Hiya.

-I gotta talk to you.

0:16:210:16:23

TURNS CAR ALARM ON

0:16:230:16:24

Babe...

0:16:250:16:27

-What's the matter?

-Sorry, Mum.

0:16:270:16:28

-Stacey, what's going on?

-Sit down a minute.

0:16:320:16:35

Right.

0:16:350:16:37

The thing is, you know we went to see the...

0:16:370:16:39

God! Look, you know how much we really want...

0:16:390:16:42

-SHE SIGHS Gav, I can't...

-Stace, what's the matter?

0:16:420:16:46

-SHE SIGHS HEAVILY

-Just tell me.

0:16:460:16:48

God... Something's happened.

0:16:480:16:50

-I don't want to tell you, because...

-What?

0:16:500:16:52

It's nothing bad. It's...

0:16:520:16:54

Oh, my God.

0:17:150:17:17

There's 34 of them.

0:17:180:17:20

I know it's expensive, but I wanted to be sure.

0:17:200:17:22

-You're not cross, are you?

-Cross? Why would I be cross?!

0:17:220:17:24

-You know what this means!

-Yeah.

0:17:240:17:26

-I'm pregnant!

-My balls work!

0:17:260:17:28

-We're going to have a baby!

-My balls work!

0:17:280:17:30

-My balls work!

-SHE LAUGHS

0:17:300:17:33

# You got the love... #

0:17:330:17:35

This is amazing.

0:17:350:17:36

-I've got to tell Mum.

-Not yet. Let's get the wedding out of the way first.

0:17:360:17:39

GWEN: Stace! Nessa's back.

0:17:390:17:41

OK.

0:17:410:17:43

I love you so much.

0:17:430:17:45

I love you too, baby.

0:17:450:17:47

BOTH: It's just the way it is. PHONE RINGS

0:17:470:17:51

-Smithy.

-Oh, Gav, we've got to get ready.

-Yeah.

0:17:510:17:56

# You got the love You got the love

0:17:560:18:00

# You got the love... #

0:18:000:18:02

NEIL GURGLES

0:18:020:18:05

Come on, then.

0:18:100:18:12

Here she is.

0:18:140:18:17

ALL: Ohh!

0:18:170:18:19

Ness, you look absolutely gorgeous.

0:18:190:18:22

-I know. I feels it.

-And you definitely want to wear the boots?

0:18:220:18:26

Yeah. They're comfy. Why suffer?

0:18:260:18:29

Jase?

0:18:290:18:30

-I've never seen anything quite like it.

-Gav?

0:18:300:18:35

Speechless. Absolutely speechless.

0:18:350:18:37

Tidy. Is Dad here yet?

0:18:370:18:40

Yeah. He just pulled up. He's outside with Bryn.

0:18:400:18:42

Right. Let's get this show on the road.

0:18:420:18:45

CAR HORNS HONK REPEATEDLY

0:18:470:18:52

Oi! Great place to stop, mate!

0:18:540:18:57

Don't know what you're smiling at.

0:19:000:19:02

This is all your fault, this. NEIL COOS

0:19:020:19:05

# Sometimes I feel like saying, "Lord, I just don't care"

0:19:050:19:08

# But you got the love I need to see me through... #

0:19:080:19:13

What, and you're travelling in there as well?

0:19:150:19:17

Yeah! I'm the bridesmaid. I'm going on the beanbag.

0:19:170:19:20

It just don't look too safe to me.

0:19:200:19:21

It's perfectly safe.

0:19:210:19:23

BRYN: Ness, you sure you wouldn't be safer actually in the car?

0:19:230:19:25

No. Bryn, how many times do you get married in this life?

0:19:250:19:28

Twice? Three times?

0:19:280:19:30

I wanna do it in style.

0:19:300:19:32

Come on, Dad. Help me up.

0:19:320:19:35

Oh, Gwen, I want to say something.

0:19:430:19:45

Yes, love?

0:19:450:19:46

There's a lot of people been asking if my mother will be there today,

0:19:460:19:49

at the wedding, like, and I said, "Yeah, she will, as it goes.

0:19:490:19:53

"Cos my mother's called Gwen."

0:19:530:19:55

That's you, not Gwen from Budgens.

0:19:560:19:58

Just wanna say thanks for everything, Gwen.

0:19:590:20:02

I'd have been lost, if truth be told.

0:20:020:20:04

Right. Dad, come on. Let's do it.

0:20:100:20:13

This is so exciting!

0:20:130:20:15

Whoo! Whoo!

0:20:150:20:17

How are you? Nice to see you. Cheers.

0:20:250:20:27

-Hi, Dave.

-Cheers, Dor. Go on. Help yourself to a seat.

0:20:270:20:31

-Hiya.

-Hiya, Dave!

0:20:310:20:34

-Look at you!

-Cheers, Pam.

0:20:340:20:36

-Where's your best man?

-Her name's Vanessa and she's on her way.

0:20:360:20:40

Oh, that's sweet. See you in there.

0:20:400:20:43

-Yeah, see you in a minute.

-Right, Dave.

0:20:430:20:46

-Hi, Dave. Congratulations.

-Cheers, John. Nice to see you.

0:20:460:20:50

How was that, then, girls?

0:21:280:21:30

Freezing. It was a stupid idea.

0:21:300:21:32

Right. Hiya, Ness. You're looking, er, very lovely.

0:21:330:21:37

Everyone's in there all set to go. Dave's looking handsome as ever.

0:21:370:21:40

So, if we're ready, I'll give him the nod...

0:21:400:21:42

No.

0:21:420:21:44

I want one final smoke as a single woman.

0:21:440:21:46

Dad?

0:21:460:21:48

Go on, then.

0:21:480:21:50

-Vic?

-Well, if we've got a few minutes.

0:21:500:21:53

Why not?

0:21:530:21:55

OK, we're in Wales now,

0:22:000:22:03

which is where you live.

0:22:030:22:05

Just because you live here

0:22:050:22:07

and your mum's Welsh,

0:22:070:22:10

when it comes to football, you're English, right?

0:22:100:22:14

You wanna play for England.

0:22:140:22:16

Don't end up like Ryan Giggs. You'll kick yourself.

0:22:160:22:20

MUSIC: "Suddenly" by Angry Anderson

0:22:220:22:23

# See the real me

0:22:230:22:26

# And I hope that you would be the one

0:22:260:22:32

# A chance to talk, a chance to grow

0:22:370:22:41

# I'll take the risk

0:22:440:22:46

# Let my feelings flow

0:22:460:22:49

# I found the words

0:22:490:22:53

# I need to say

0:22:530:22:57

# Suddenly you're seeing me

0:23:000:23:03

# Just the way I am

0:23:050:23:07

# Suddenly you're hearing me

0:23:070:23:10

# So I'm talking just as fast as I can

0:23:100:23:13

# To you... #

0:23:130:23:17

All right, Dave?

0:23:170:23:18

You look amazing.

0:23:180:23:20

Cheers.

0:23:200:23:22

We are gathered here today to witness the marriage between

0:23:250:23:28

Vanessa Shanessa Jenkins and David Lloyd Gooch.

0:23:280:23:32

# Now I know that you are mine

0:23:350:23:40

# You bring me love... #

0:23:400:23:43

And now Michael Shipman will read David's favourite poem.

0:23:430:23:47

"Stop all the clocks

0:23:510:23:53

"Cut off the telephone

0:23:530:23:55

"Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone

0:23:550:23:59

"Silence the pianos and with muffled drum

0:23:590:24:04

"Bring out the coffin Let the mourners come."

0:24:040:24:08

We all have, as it were, our song...

0:24:110:24:14

# Suddenly

0:24:140:24:16

# Every part of me

0:24:160:24:19

# Needs to know... #

0:24:190:24:21

If anyone knows any just cause or impediment

0:24:210:24:24

why Vanessa and David should not be joined together in holy matrimony,

0:24:240:24:29

ye are to declare it now.

0:24:290:24:32

-HE EXHALES

-That's always a hairy moment.

0:24:370:24:40

-DOOR OPENS Am I too late?

-No, we're just getting to the important bit now.

0:24:410:24:45

Grab yourself a seat.

0:24:450:24:47

Vanessa and David...

0:24:470:24:49

No, wait.

0:24:490:24:51

-Has it happened him and her?

-Smithy...

0:24:510:24:53

-Is it signed? Is it done?

-Mate, what are you doing?

0:24:530:24:55

DAVE: Come on. This is our day now.

0:24:550:24:57

-Is there something you wanted to say?

-Yeah.

0:24:570:25:02

No.

0:25:040:25:06

I don't know.

0:25:060:25:08

I'm a bit confused, to be honest.

0:25:100:25:12

I know what you're all thinking -

0:25:120:25:14

like this is some big romantic gesture,

0:25:140:25:17

like I'm declaring my love for her, or something, but I'm not.

0:25:170:25:20

In fact, the weirdest thing is, if anything,

0:25:210:25:23

a lot of the time you repulse me.

0:25:230:25:25

THEY GASP No... Honestly, it's not like that.

0:25:250:25:28

I know that doesn't offend her. It doesn't, does it?

0:25:280:25:31

Cos I know you feel exactly the same about me, right?

0:25:310:25:33

Yeah. He's right. A lot of the time, I find him disgusting.

0:25:330:25:37

See?

0:25:370:25:39

And yet we have these moments.

0:25:420:25:44

These weird moments, these things in common.

0:25:460:25:49

And we've got him.

0:25:510:25:53

And if you're marrying Dave just so you've got a father for your son,

0:25:540:25:58

someone to help you and support you and be around,

0:25:580:26:02

I'm saying you've already got that.

0:26:020:26:05

Me. I can be those things.

0:26:070:26:09

I just think if you're marrying him,

0:26:110:26:13

you should do it for the right reasons.

0:26:130:26:15

You should do it cos you love him.

0:26:160:26:18

But I don't think you do.

0:26:200:26:23

Well? Do you love him, Vanessa?

0:26:240:26:27

Do you love David?

0:26:270:26:29

Yeah.

0:26:290:26:31

I do.

0:26:310:26:32

Really?

0:26:320:26:34

Yeah.

0:26:340:26:35

OK.

0:26:350:26:37

DAVE: No, you don't.

0:26:380:26:41

-Oh, heck.

-What are you on about?

0:26:410:26:45

He's right, Ness.

0:26:450:26:47

It breaks my heart to admit it, but I don't think you do love me.

0:26:470:26:50

I think this last year, I've been kidding myself.

0:26:510:26:53

Every time I'd tell you I loved you, you'd say, "I know."

0:26:550:26:58

And I thought you were saying you loved me too, but you weren't.

0:26:580:27:01

You were just saying, "I know."

0:27:030:27:04

I know.

0:27:080:27:09

No hard feelings, eh, Dave?

0:27:160:27:18

It's been a blast, sugar tits.

0:27:300:27:32

NESSA: Gav, what time is it? Famished, I am.

0:27:540:27:56

Me too. Are we getting this takeaway or what?

0:27:560:27:58

Yeah, I'll ring 'em now in a minute.

0:27:580:28:01

"Now in a minute"? How can that possibly make sense?

0:28:010:28:03

You're either doing it in a minute or now. It can't be both.

0:28:030:28:05

Yeah - I'm gonna ring the Chinese now in a minute.

0:28:050:28:08

That makes sense, doesn't it?

0:28:080:28:10

Oh, Stace, I don't care. I just want you to order the damn Chinese.

0:28:100:28:14

-All right?

-We're deciding on food for tonight.

0:28:140:28:17

Yeah. What's occurring?

0:28:170:28:18

Ooh! Welsh person!

0:28:180:28:20

What? Oh, no!

0:28:200:28:21

-Forget that even happened.

-You're Welsh.

0:28:210:28:23

-Don't make a big thing out of it.

-You are.

-You're Welsh.

0:28:230:28:25

No. Wait. It doesn't make me Welsh just because I said...

0:28:250:28:29

I didn't just say that. It don't make me Welsh.

0:28:290:28:31

I'm telling you... THEY LAUGH

0:28:310:28:34

# Tell me tomorrow I'll wait by the window for you

0:28:340:28:36

# I'll wait by the big house for you

0:28:420:28:46

# I'll wait by the squeezebox for you. #

0:28:500:28:54

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:29:010:29:03

E-mail [email protected]

0:29:030:29:05

Download Subtitles

SRT

ASS