Episode 5 Harry & Paul


Episode 5

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TRUMPET FANFARE # Hurrah for Harry and Paul

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# Your comedy is challenging and bold

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# You're both incredibly handsome and tall

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# You're not even beginning to look old

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# We strive to increase production of flat-screen televisions

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# So we can enjoy Harry and Paul in the highest of definitions

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# We're pleased to let you bed our wives whenever your fancy beckons

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# We'll fight with all of our might

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# For your right to develop nuclear weapons

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# Hurrah for Harry and Paul. #

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Good morning, sir.

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Hello, I'd like to buy a television.

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Is this a television?

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Yes. She's a beauty, isn't she?

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Is it like going to the cinema, but at home?

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Not really, sir. The cinema is full of Drama and Romance,

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whereas the television produces a diet of drivel

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and cookery programmes.

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Is it possible to sample some drivel and cookery programmes?

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Certainly, sir.

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I'll turn the television on to receive the one channel using this knob here.

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Goodness me how complicated - I shall never get my head around that.

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Oh, don't worry, sir, your children will soon get the hang of it.

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Here comes the drivel now.

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'The Apprentice!'

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Are you my eldest son?

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Yes, Lord Sir Alan, Father.

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You are hired as my apprentice.

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And in a year you shall have the company.

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Thank you.

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Are you my daughter?

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I'm afraid so, Lord Sir Alan Sugar Daddy.

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-You're fired.

-Of course. I quite understand.

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Go home and do some knitting.

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Humphreygella Bites

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Boil the cabbage for two hours. Boil the carrots for two hours.

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Boil the potatoes for two hours.

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Now it's time to prepare your meat.

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-Boil the meat for two hours.

-TIMER PINGS

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There. Perfect for your husband and his friends.

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What splendid drivel and cookery programmes. I'll buy it!

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Congratulations, sir. Your life will be immeasurably improved.

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Now tell me, how are you feeling?

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I am somewhat afeared, your honour.

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Yes, of course. There's no reason to feel afeared.

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Sheridan here holds the record time for chopping legs off.

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18 and a half seconds!

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You won't feel a thing, pain aside.

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Nurse - more gin, please.

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And for me, please.

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Thank you.

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Now!

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Pay attention students of anatomy my hands are rather cold,

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I do apologise Trois, deux, un.

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Argh!

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Now Charles, are you playing golf with the Duke of Wellington tomorrow?

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-Oh yes.

-Owwwww!

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And is he a member of the St Andrew's Society of Golfers as well?

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No, he's coming as my guest.

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Argh!

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You must ask him to pop round here sometime

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because I've just taken delivery of a wonderful new hammer and chisel

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-and I might be able to do something about that nobble on his nose.

-Owwwww!

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Well, you could ask him yourself if you'd care to join us.

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I can't, I'm afraid.

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I'm popping down to Bristol with my godson on an anti-slavery march.

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Oh, that does sound fun!

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There. Got the blighter!

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Arrrrrrgh!

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Enjoy that, Fido.

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Right, all I've got to do now is file down some of these gristly

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nibbly nobbly bits and you'll be right as rain.

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Owwwww!

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Now, Charles, did you see in the London Times that this fellow

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Stephenson has invented a steam horse?

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Yes, whatever will they think of next?

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Anaesthetic!

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Ha, ha! Oh! Very good indeed.

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All that remains is for me to cauterise your stump...

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Pop that back in, shall we?

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..with this lovely poker.

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Argh! Argh!

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-That's me pretty well done. He's all yours.

-Right. Thank you. Would you care for a haircut?

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We are the Society of Barbers AND Surgeons.

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Argh!

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I'll take that as a yes, shall I?

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Any questions?

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Yes. How do you perform a short back and sides?

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Watch and learn, young man.

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-Ow!

-I'm so sorry, did I pull your hair?

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The Arsenal done well last week didn't they, sir?

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They produced a remarkable number of muskets for the war against France.

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He-hoo-ha!

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Anything for the weekend, sir?

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And next, our third contender, please.

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And your name is?

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Ken Barnet from Brian Farnet.

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-Your occupation?

-Inventor.

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And your chosen subject?

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The works of JK Rowling.

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You have two minutes starting now! The second in the series of

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Harry Potter books is called Harry Potter And The Chamber Of what?

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Harry Potter And The Chamber Of...

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Pass.

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At the beginning of Harry Potter And The Philosopher's Stone,

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Professor McGonnegal is to be found outside the Dursley's house

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disguised in the form of what animal?

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Pass.

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What is the name of the sport played at Hogwarts involving

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riding on broomsticks in an attempt to strike a golden snitch?

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Pass.

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The Hogwarts Express leaves

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Kings Cross Station from Platform number what?

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Pass.

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Harry Potter has a ginger-haired friend with the surname Weazley,

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what is his first name?

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-Pass.

-What is the first name of Professor Dumbledore?

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-Albert.

-No Albus - in Harry Potter and the...

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-BEEP

-I've started so I'll finish.

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In Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows, Harry, Ron,

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and Hermione flee into London and to 12 Grimauld Place, where they

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learn from Kreacher the whereabouts of Salazar Slytherin's locket.

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They successfully recover this Horcrux by infiltrating

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the Ministry of Magic and stealing it from Dolores Umbridge.

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Under the object's evil influence and the stress of being on the run,

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Ron leaves the others.

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Harry and Hermione travel to Godric's Hollow,

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Harry's birthplace and the place where his parents died.

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What is the name of the elderly magical historian they meet there?

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Pass.

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And at the end of that round, Ken Barnet, you have 24 passes

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and no points.

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And next our final contender, please.

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APPLAUSE

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And your name is?

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Brian Farnet from Frian Barnet.

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Your occupation?

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Entrepreneur.

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And your chosen subject?

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Pass.

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Well, I think you've got a very good point there, Padraig.

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Now, fill me in on your family. Your daughter by your current wife?

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Siobhan, she's a very hard-working little thing not as bright as the others...

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Cheltenham Ladies College and she's been accepted at Magdalen College, Oxford.

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Magdalen College, Oxford? How wonderful.

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And your daughter by your last marriage?

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Very well...

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-Harpers and Queen...

-HE GIBBERS

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And she's the new Face of L'Oreal, because she's worth it.

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Goodness me, L'Oreal. She certainly is worth it, yes.

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And your daughters from your first marriage?

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-Oh, well...

-HE CONTINUES TO GIBBER

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Senior Prosecutor at The Hague. The other one, Mary, she's a very...

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The Taoiseach of the Dail.

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The next Taoiseach of the Dail.

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They're a high achieving lot, your O'Herlighy girls, aren't they?

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-HE GIBBERS

-How are your girls?

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Very well. Annabel's just had her third child with her husband, Hamish,

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who runs something called funkywalrus.com.

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Don't ask me what it is, selling brightly-coloured

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bedspreads on the world wide web, or something.

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And Lucy's just married her rugby player,

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and Tara's just got engaged to a funny little fat fellow from

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Knight Frank Battersea nothing goes in, but he's very good value.

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Well, the way I look at it is, they're very, very, lucky...

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Very lucky, yes, yes. Now do you fancy a wank?

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Ah, well, I was talking to... One off the wrist.

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Well, a wank was the tip on Radio 4 this morning but...

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HE GIBBERS INCOMPREHENSIBLY

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John Humphrys is an uppity little fellow.

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Pompous little git.

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We're closed.

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Soon the Duke of this large town will say, "Build me a bell tower!"

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so the people can hear well when it is time for the shops to close!

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And he will say to you, "You are the pale man with the oily skin.

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"Bring me a big bronze bell for the tower."

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So you will bring the bell, but there's been a silly mistake.

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Your bell is too soft.

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"He has brought us soft bells Too soft,

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"we can't hear them."

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The Duke is depressed. He says, "This man

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"brought us the soft bells, take a picture of this man and print it

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"in the newspaper, you stupid man with no idea of bells, I curse you!"

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And anyway, Maude Hopkins 'as got a coloured family moved in next door to her!

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She says they're all right if you talk to 'em one to one, but

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they're very noisy and their cookin' smells funny and she don't like 'em.

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Well, anyway, anyway, anyway, anyway 'Arry Belafonte an'

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Sammy Davis Junior, they're coloured an' they sing beautiful so they can't all be bad, can they?

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And anyway, I ain't sayin' nothin' 'bout the coloureds, I ain't colour prejudiced.

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Are you going down the Tottenham Royal Saturday?

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I'm walking out with Terry Buckle. He does boxing.

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Terry Buckle. Well, I heard he started a fight with a chap what had a wooden

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leg at his Christmas do. You want to watch him.

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Yeah, that was self defence. That bloke swung at Terry with his wooden leg.

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And anyway, anyway, on that television advertisement

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they say you're never alone wiv a Strand?

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Well, that's a lie, isn't it?

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Betsy Drummond who works in the Odeon opposite the Locarno

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said she saw you waiting for that Terry Buckle for an hour and he never showed up.

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And you smoked twenty fags in a row and then ran 'orf crying.

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How tragic! She said yer pink cardy looked nice.

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Well, anyway, I actually 'ad somethin' in me

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eye as a matter of fact.

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And anyway, your brother was taunting

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old Mrs Sallow as she come out the chiropodists.

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Threw a conker at her he did.

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Then he put a banger through 'er letterbox.

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He's tuppence short of ten bob, he is.

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Gave 'im a piece of my mind, I did.

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He looked at me like this, he did. Gormless he is.

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I like that new green cardy. Shame it don't fit you properly.

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Well, anyway, anyway, ain't my brother's fault he's two bob short of a pound -

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he got hit by a doodlebug when he was a babby.

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And anyway, you used to show 'im your knickers at the old

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pillar box on the common, so there.

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And at the end of your general knowledge round, Ken Barnet, you have 19 passes and no points.

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The name of the Cornish church in which former

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Poet Laureate John Betjeman is buried is...

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BOTH: St Enedoc.

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The US state that has a capital called Pierre is...

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BOTH: South Dakota.

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The name of the device capable of storing electricity, consisting

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of conducting plates separated by a layer of insulating material is...

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BOTH: A capacitor.

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People suffering from trichotillomania have an impulse to...

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BOTH: Pull out their own hair.

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The chemical compound H2O is more commonly known as...

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BOTH: Water.

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The red, amber and green lights found at road junctions

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and used to control the flow of vehicles are known as...

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BOTH: Traffic lights.

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The red double-decker mode of public transport is know as...

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BOTH: A bus.

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And finally, the number that comes after six and before eight is of course...

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BOTH: Seven.

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You may return to your seat.

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Have you heard of Angela Merkel?

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-Yes.

-Is he a quare?

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Well, he looks like a quare, doesn't he?

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Oh, he looks like a quare.

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And he sounds like a quare on the wireless.

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Oh, he sounds like a quare.

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If he looks like a quare and sounds like a quare, I should think he's a quare.

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Yes, if he looks like a quare and sounds like a quare, he's probably a quare.

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-Probably a quare.

-Probably a quare.

-Probably a quare.

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If it's possible to sound like a quare on the wireless,

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when one's speaking German.

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Oh, that's a very good point. Bunny?!

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Hmm?

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You're a quare, aren't you, Bunny?

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Well, I'm on Grindr.

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-Does that mean you're a quare, Bunny?

-Oh, yes.

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Bunny is a quare, so he might know.

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Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

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Bunny, is it possible to sound like a frightful quare on the wireless?

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-Oh, yes.

-Let me finish PLEASE, Bunny!

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I'm sorry.

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Is it possible to sound like a frightful quare on the wireless?

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Oh, yes.

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THERE YOU GO AGAIN. PLEASE, YOU WON'T LET ME FINISH!

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I can't get anywhere with Bunny today. Stupid old quare.

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Bunny kept butting in cos he's a stupid old quare.

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He's a stupid old quare. Stupid old quare! You stupid old quare!

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We'll just have to leave Bunny out of this one, the stupid old quare.

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Merkel's married of course.

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-Is she very pretty, his wife?

-Certainly not, she's a man.

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-He looks like a frightful quare.

-He does look like a quare.

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So this Angela Merkel fellow - he wears a dress like a quare,

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he sounds like a quare on the wireless like a quare,

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and he's married to a quare like a quare.

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I should think he's probably a quare.

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Probably a German quare.

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Probably a German quare.

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Now, from the 1940/'50s

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Movie Originals presents... The Hangover.

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What the...?

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How the...?

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We almost polished off a whole bottle of wine.

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Just the three of us.

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Good morning. I'm Mr Boot the chemist.

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Here are the photographs I've developed from the negatives

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you gave me rather late last night when you were slightly squiffy.

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But I don't remember

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-ECHOING:

-Slightly squiffy...

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-I don't remember. ECHOING:

-Slightly squiffy.

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Oh, no!

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I appear to be in the process of knocking over a vase!

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And look, there's a chip on the lip.

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And I've fallen over in a puddle. My knee's all muddy.

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And I'm saying hello to a Chinaman.

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Marigold loves vases -

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if she learns I've chipped one she'll never marry me.

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Marigold detests Chinamen.

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If she finds out I've said hello to one,

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she'll never let me be best man.

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And my knee's far too muddy to go to a wedding.

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And the wedding is in one hour's time!

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CLOCK CHIMES

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Just enough time for me to dry and wipe my trousers.

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And me to mend this vase with Araldite.

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And me to destroy the evidence that I ever said hello to a Chinaman.

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Phew!

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And now Marigold will never know anything happened at all.

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And we've still ten minutes to get to the church.

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Come on.

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THEY ALL CHUCKLE

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Oh, who's that?

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A dead Chinaman.

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Take a look at the lines on this face.

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They say "Don't mess with this face cos this is the face of a cop

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"and this face is attached to the head of a cop,

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"a head made of i-ron, the i-ron they make cops out of from".

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Give me a Jack and ice.

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You a cop?

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What do I look like? A nun?

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Sure, I'm a cop. You a cop?

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What do I look like? A nurse? Sure, I'm a cop.

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The moment you walked in here I thought, "He's a cop.

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"He walks like a cop, he sits like a cop, he drinks like a cop.

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"He's a cop."

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I knew you was a cop - you talk like a cop,

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you look like a cop, you drink like a cop.

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It ain't easy being a cop.

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We ain't cops cos it's easy.

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If we wanted it easy we wouldn't be cops.

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DOOR SLAMMING

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Hey! Did your leg catch a bullet?

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Gimme a Jack and ice

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Are you a cop?

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Do I look like a cop? I'm a surgeon.

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And no I did not catch a bullet, I have an arterial embolism,

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which caused some of my leg tissue to wither and die.

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Where have you idiots been these last eight years?

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Also, confusingly, I'm an Old Etonian -

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jolly hockey sticks, you have Cancer.

0:17:340:17:36

What did he say?

0:17:360:17:37

I think he said he wants to be a cop.

0:17:370:17:40

# And his black and white cat-aweyo

0:17:470:17:50

# Forget to feed the meter

0:17:500:17:53

# Pataweyo's eager

0:17:530:17:55

# To pop a ticket on your car and get you towed away-o. #

0:17:550:18:01

It's a lovely morning, isn't it? Look at this nice car.

0:18:030:18:06

It's legally parked, but only until 8.30.

0:18:060:18:09

It must be nearly 8.30 now.

0:18:090:18:12

I wonder if there are any parking wardens around?

0:18:120:18:16

Yes! There are four!

0:18:180:18:20

Good morning, Parking Pataweyo!

0:18:200:18:22

Good morning, Lovely Rita-vitch, Meter-vitch Maid.

0:18:230:18:27

Top o'the morning to you, Parking Pat-Eddery.

0:18:270:18:30

Good morning, Parking Patel.

0:18:300:18:32

Look at you all circling the car like vultures.

0:18:340:18:37

What time is it now?

0:18:370:18:38

Oh, only 8.29?

0:18:380:18:41

Let's hope the owner doesn't turn up.

0:18:410:18:43

Oh, no!

0:18:430:18:44

Here he comes now - he's JUST in time to move his car.

0:18:440:18:48

"It's only 8.29 and you can't give me a ticket."

0:18:480:18:53

Look at sneaky old Parking Pataweyo.

0:18:530:18:55

And your friends are keeping Salesman Steve distracted

0:18:550:18:58

by pretending to punch out tickets

0:18:580:19:00

while refusing to acknowledge anything he says.

0:19:000:19:03

"You're not acknowledging anything I say!"

0:19:030:19:05

8.30 precisely.

0:19:080:19:10

"Oh, dear, it's 8.30

0:19:140:19:16

"and I've incurred a well-deserved penalty notice."

0:19:160:19:19

What a wonderful start to the day.

0:19:220:19:25

Everybody loves Parking Pataweyo and his friends.

0:19:250:19:28

SCOTTISH ACCENT: Did you see the football last night?

0:19:310:19:33

Tremendous game, was it not?

0:19:330:19:35

Oh, yes, er, Motherwell against Dundee United.

0:19:350:19:38

Oh, for goodness sake, Geoff, whilst all reasonable minded people

0:19:380:19:41

would acknowledge that Scottish football is much, much better

0:19:410:19:44

than English football, there's no need to be patronising and racist.

0:19:440:19:48

I refer of course to the match between Manchester United

0:19:480:19:51

and Newcastle United, last night, on television -

0:19:510:19:55

invented by a Scotsman, John Logie Baird.

0:19:550:19:59

Oh, yeah, sorry.

0:19:590:20:00

Did you happen to notice who came up with the tactics

0:20:000:20:03

for the winning team and where they hail from?

0:20:030:20:06

Sir Alex Ferguson and he's a Scotsman.

0:20:060:20:09

A Scotsman, exactly...

0:20:090:20:11

a Scotsman, precisely...

0:20:110:20:13

a Scotsman, aye...

0:20:130:20:14

a Scotsman, mmm, a Scotsman, ah-ha!

0:20:140:20:17

I reckon the England squad could probably do with a Scottish manager!

0:20:170:20:20

If you continue to be patronising and racist,

0:20:200:20:23

I shall take my custom elsewhere.

0:20:230:20:26

Dinnae worry about him, pal. We're not all like that.

0:20:280:20:32

I take a sideways look at life.

0:20:320:20:34

I dinnae even like football.

0:20:340:20:37

Imagine if we dinnae have a ball, what would they call it then?

0:20:370:20:41

Foot? How spooky is that?

0:20:410:20:44

And anyway Major Crabtree's asked me round 'is 'ouse Saturday, personal,

0:20:440:20:47

to 'elp 'im with his ledgers and so forth.

0:20:470:20:49

So I might be late for bingo.

0:20:490:20:50

Well, that's not all you'll be late for if you go round there,

0:20:500:20:53

if you'll pardon my mentionin'.

0:20:530:20:54

Pamela Wells went round to 'elp 'im with 'is ledgers',

0:20:540:20:57

now she's shellin' peas in a convent

0:20:570:20:58

so you eat plenty of onions before you go round. 'E's a beast!

0:20:580:21:02

-Yeah, well, anyway.

-Yeah, well, anyway.

0:21:020:21:04

-Well, anyway.

-Anyway.

0:21:040:21:05

And anyway, I saw a gypsy woman lurkin' outside Bradshaw's this morning.

0:21:050:21:08

Couldn't see no caravans, mind, but I wasn't going in for no colic.

0:21:080:21:11

Well, anyway, anyway, anyway, anyway that Mr Bradshaw,

0:21:110:21:14

he's always got gypsy women lurking around,

0:21:140:21:16

ever since his wife ran off with that short chap.

0:21:160:21:18

Used to collect the pop bottles.

0:21:180:21:19

Yeah, and anyway, what you givin' up for lent?

0:21:190:21:21

I'm giving up Carnation milk. Wot you givin up? Sailors?

0:21:210:21:24

-Chance'd be a fine thing! Ta-da.

-Ta-da.

0:21:240:21:26

Next up, it's Ken and Brian, from Brian Farnet,

0:21:300:21:35

with their novel solution to a modern storage problem.

0:21:350:21:39

Hello, Dragons.

0:21:390:21:40

How often do you come back from the shops with loads of plastic bags?

0:21:400:21:46

They get stuffed into a cupboard, they're messy and unsightful,

0:21:460:21:50

and the next time you go shopping, you come back with even more!

0:21:500:21:54

We present the BAG Bag.

0:21:540:21:56

The Bag Bag is a powerful and planet-friendly innovation

0:21:590:22:03

in bag storage technology.

0:22:030:22:05

It tucks in-ox-spicuously into a back pocket,

0:22:050:22:08

but when required the Bag Bag automatically expands

0:22:080:22:12

and can accommodate up to 20 plastic bags

0:22:120:22:16

for an astonishing period of 75 days.

0:22:160:22:20

What happens to the Bag Bag after 75 days?

0:22:200:22:24

The Bag Bag bio-degrades harmlessly and odiously,

0:22:240:22:27

with no impact on the environment whatsoever.

0:22:270:22:31

The Dragons are environmentally excited.

0:22:320:22:36

This is a genuine, totally biodegradable plastic bag?

0:22:360:22:40

Yes. For storing supermarket plastic bags.

0:22:400:22:44

I think the point is that you two idiots

0:22:440:22:47

appear to have come up with a solution

0:22:470:22:49

to the international supermarket plastic bag problem.

0:22:490:22:53

This is an eco-testicul invention of a lovely, happy-clappy,

0:22:530:22:58

planet friendly, hello peoples, plastic bag.

0:22:580:23:01

Yeah, if I can be allowed to finish...

0:23:010:23:02

Despite the Dragons' enormous enthusiasm,

0:23:020:23:05

Brian insists on droning on about keeping bags in the Bag Bag.

0:23:050:23:10

Shut up, you tit!

0:23:100:23:11

Or a whole year's supply, the 24 box of bag of three Bag Bag Bag's Box.

0:23:110:23:17

Put your socks in it.

0:23:170:23:19

Don't you realise we could shift billions of these things everyday

0:23:190:23:22

at the supermarkets as a degradable bag.

0:23:220:23:26

If I can be ALLOWED to finish...

0:23:260:23:28

-Shut up!

-..we anticipate selling the Bag Bag at a price of...

0:23:280:23:31

-Shut up!

-..49 pence per unit...

0:23:310:23:33

Brian doesn't seem to realise what's actually good about their invention,

0:23:330:23:37

but Ken has clicked.

0:23:370:23:39

No, shut it, Ken! Shut it. I'm not interested in them.

0:23:390:23:44

I resign with great reluctance from our professional company!

0:23:440:23:48

Brian has flounced out,

0:23:520:23:54

leaving Ken in sole ownership of the best idea

0:23:540:23:58

anyone has ever had on Dragons' Den.

0:23:580:24:01

Ken, the Dragons gave you £80 million

0:24:020:24:06

for one per cent of your company.

0:24:060:24:09

How are you going to celebrate?

0:24:090:24:10

I'm going to buy a new Vauxhall Zafira.

0:24:100:24:14

Well, if you fancy taking me out in it one evening...?

0:24:140:24:16

All right.

0:24:200:24:22

PHONE RINGING

0:24:290:24:31

Simpkins Motors.

0:24:370:24:38

I'd like to buy a second-hand car.

0:24:380:24:39

Do you have a second-hand car for sale?

0:24:390:24:41

-Yes, I do.

-Is it in good working order?

0:24:410:24:44

Like new - would you care to come and inspect it?

0:24:440:24:46

Oh, that won't be necessary,

0:24:460:24:48

I'm sure you're an honest man, aren't you?

0:24:480:24:50

Of course, and I rather resent you even asking the question.

0:24:500:24:53

I do apologise.

0:24:530:24:54

-Now, do you have a driver's licence?

-Certainly not.

0:24:540:24:57

It's a voluntary thing introduced by the government -

0:24:570:24:59

unnecessary really - unless you're a woman that is!

0:24:590:25:02

-Heavens no!

-'Good.'

0:25:020:25:04

-Have you driven a car before?

-I've been on a tram once.

0:25:040:25:07

Same gist, really, except you sit at the front

0:25:070:25:10

and you shouldn't read your book.

0:25:100:25:11

Well, I'm sure I'll get the hang of it.

0:25:110:25:13

How much is this second-hand car, if it's not too vulgar a question?

0:25:130:25:17

It is too vulgar a question. Ten pounds.

0:25:170:25:19

That's a bit steep.

0:25:190:25:20

Five pounds.

0:25:200:25:22

I'll take it. Will you deliver it to my home?

0:25:220:25:25

'Of course. We're based in Bournemouth, where are you?'

0:25:250:25:28

The Hebrides.

0:25:280:25:29

We'll have it with you this afternoon.

0:25:290:25:31

Would you like me to pay in advance?

0:25:310:25:33

No, no, you can pay whenever the fancy takes you.

0:25:330:25:36

I'm sure you're an honest fellow, aren't you?

0:25:360:25:38

Of course, and I rather resent you even asking the question. Goodbye.

0:25:380:25:41

Goodbye.

0:25:410:25:43

Have you heard of Harry Enfield?

0:25:500:25:53

-Yes.

-Is he a quare?

0:25:530:25:55

No, I...don't think he is a quare.

0:25:570:25:59

Well, he looks like a quare...

0:25:590:26:01

..and he sounds like a quare, and he's on television.

0:26:030:26:06

Oh, well, then, if he looks like a quare, sounds like a quare

0:26:060:26:09

and he's on television, like a quare, then I should think yes...

0:26:090:26:11

No, I don't think he is a quare. No.

0:26:110:26:13

Have you heard of Paul Whitehouse?

0:26:170:26:20

No.

0:26:200:26:21

-Is he a quare?

-Yes.

0:26:210:26:23

# Hurrah for Harry and Paul

0:26:230:26:27

# Your comedy is challenging and bold

0:26:270:26:31

# You're both incredibly handsome and tall

0:26:310:26:35

# You're not even beginning to look bald

0:26:350:26:39

# We strive to increase production

0:26:390:26:41

# Of flatscreen televisions

0:26:410:26:43

# So we can enjoy Harry and Paul in the highest of definitions... #

0:26:430:26:47

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0:26:470:26:50

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