Episode 1 I Want My Wife Back


Episode 1

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Transcript


LineFromTo

'We used to come here all the time.

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'We were so in love.

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'For ten years, everything was perfect.

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'Oh, what was I thinking?

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'It all started to go wrong when I got promoted.'

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Bex, should I serve up?

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I'm so sorry, Lisa. It's just this new job.

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I'm sure he'll be here soon.

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PHONE RINGS

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Hi, Murray.

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Oh.

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OK.

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Would the godparents please step forward?

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'Before I knew it, I was working weekends.'

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-Sorry.

-PHONE RINGS

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Hi, Murray.

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Oh, right.

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'I even managed to miss Valentine's night.'

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PHONE RINGS

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'I suppose sometimes you just lose sight of what's important in life.

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'I really hope it's not too late.'

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'This is an Edinburgh Airport security announcement.

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'Please remember to keep all baggage...'

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Can't remember which is which now. THEY CHUCKLE

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It's difficult, isn't it? Huh.

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I think I like this one best.

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Really? Do you think that would work for a younger woman?

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Well, I think so.

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Sorry, er, I didn't mean to imply you weren't a...

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It...it's for my wife. She's 40 today, so...

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Oh, not that 40's young, but it's younger than...

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How old are you? No, no. Don't feel the need to answer that.

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-So, you'll take this one?

-Yes, please.

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Cos what is young these days, anyway?

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They say 50's the new 40, don't they? 40's the new 30...

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-I'm 42.

-Really? Oh, well done. Yes...

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Well, that's why it's, er...very helpful

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to the get the advice of a 42-year-old

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on what a younger woman of...40 might like.

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-Shall I put it in a bag?

-Yeah, stick it in the old bag.

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Yeah, that old bag, that bag. Not...

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-You know, your plane leaves in five minutes?

-What?! Oh!

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Hi, Bex, it's me. Pick up if you're there.

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No? Look, really sorry, hon.

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Bit of a problem with the flight,

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so I'm going to have to miss your birthday breakfast,

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go straight to the office.

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I know, I know, it's me making this phone call again,

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but I'll see you later at home. Love you.

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Ooh, er, one more thing.

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# Happy birthday to you... #

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I'm going to take the back route, mate.

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Oh, no, no. Er, left. It'll be quicker, honestly.

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Just follow the signs to Brighton.

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# ..happy birthday to you... #

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Don't worry. I've done this route before, you know?

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No, you'll hit traffic at the lights.

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# ..happy birthday, dear... #

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All right, but don't blame me!

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Yeah, I'm trying to sing Happy Birthday here.

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# ..Bex! Happy birthday to... #

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No, left! Left! Left!

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# ..you. #

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'I know it's me making this phone call again, but I'm...'

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"Dear...Murray...

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"I'm...going...away...

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"..for...for a bit."

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Yes, I know it's short notice, but I thought it'd be nice

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if a few of her friends and family surprised her, yeah?

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Yes, tonight.

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"..all my love...Bex." Hm.

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Yes, it is last minute, but I missed her birthday breakfast and, er...

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-"..kind...regards."

-SHE SIGHS

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"Cheers!"

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I'll just put "Bex."

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-Oh, Murray, thank God you're here.

-Morning, Emma.

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Everything OK?

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Erm, a memory stick has gone missing

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with loads of Pentratech's data on it,

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and IT are saying that you're the last person to have it.

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-Yeah, yeah. I've got it.

-Y...you... What?!

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I took it to Scotland with me for the investment conference.

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-LAUGHING:

-Oh, God.

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Oh, what a relief. I thought you were in real trouble there.

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Everything's under control.

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Oh, I want to kiss you.

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-Please don't.

-No. No, not here.

-THEY LAUGH AWKWARDLY

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Not...right now.

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LIFT BELL RINGS Ah, the lift!

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-Saved by the bell...of the lift.

-Yes.

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I love your tie, by the way.

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Thanks. Yeah. Got it from Bex, my wife.

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-She's 50 today, isn't she?

-40, yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

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I'm actually organising a surprise birthday party for her.

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Are you? Aw!

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Yeah, well, she's been a bit down recently.

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I think it's the big four-oh.

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You know, didn't really want to celebrate at all.

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The plan was for a night in with me and my famous poached salmon.

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I love poached salmon. Can I have the recipe?

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Yeah, but it's just...it's just sort of poached...

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There we go, Barney.

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-So, how many people are coming...

-Well, so far...

-..to the party?

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..I've got 14, but I'm hoping for about 20 odd, so...

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Oh, she doesn't deserve you, Murray.

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I mean, I'm just saying she's...you know, so lucky to have you,

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you going to all this effort.

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A party and...

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LIFT BELL RINGS Oh, here we are. The fourth floor.

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Yes, OUR floor.

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My favourite floor.

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Hi, Grant, about the party again, erm...

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I'm not checking up on you -

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I'm just seeing if you got the message.

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I'm not being judgmental. I'm just...

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There's no tone to my voice, Grant.

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Look, if you can pick up some booze after work, that'd be great.

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How could you take offence to the word great?

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OK, fine. I'll pick it up myself.

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No, I'm not cutting you off, I'm... Grant?!

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HE SIGHS Oh! Hello, Don!

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Come here! Give your father-in-law a hug.

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-Ha, ha!

-WHISPERING: Not in the office...

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I bought the balloons for the party. It's a brilliant idea.

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I've spoken to Gord and Aud - they're keen to come.

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Do you remember them?

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They stayed with me and Paula in the villa in Turkey last year.

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Excellent. Sorry about the short notice...

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I thought they were going to give you a bigger office.

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Ah, well, er, not yet. Has been mentioned.

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I think that proposal got lost on Curtis's desk.

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Well, if it's been mentioned, they should see it through!

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Where is Curtis? I'll remind him myself.

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-Oh, no, Don. He's...not around.

-Don't let him forget.

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You were Relationship Manager of the Year last year - you deserve it.

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Oh! Hello...Curtis.

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-Do you remember my father-in-law, Don?

-Hello, there.

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Yeah, nice to...see you...again.

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You know, Murray's always saying how lucky he is to have you as a boss.

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But then, you're very lucky to have him.

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Well, he's a very valued member of the team.

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Indeed, he's a very valued member of my family.

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Good. Well, I'm glad he's so valued.

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Then why haven't you given him a bigger office?

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Thanks for dropping by...

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He was Relationship Manager of the Year last year.

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Yeah, I know. I gave him the award. That's me in the photo.

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Is it?

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Christ, you've put on weight.

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HE CHUCKLES I'll see you tonight then, Don.

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Yeah, all right. See you around.

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You all right, mate?!

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Quite a character.

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It was a good game, hm...?

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So, how was Edinburgh?

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Oh...

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Manic, as usual. Weren't you meant to be there?

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Oh, er, something came up.

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How was the weather?

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-Oh, it was all right. Yeah. Rained in the afternoon.

-OK.

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OK, and what did you do after the conference?

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Oh, we...we went for sushi.

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Sushi. Where?

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-Er...Wakimotos.

-Wakimotos.

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And, you were staying at the Radisson, weren't you?

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Yeah, it's just... Sorry, is...is there a problem?

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No, no, no, not at all.

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Oh, erm, about tonight, Bex's party. Got the message.

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-Tamzin's really looking forward to it.

-Oh, great.

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It would just be better if the whole Edinburgh thing comes up

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that I was there with you enjoying the sushi in Wakimotos.

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-You were with me?

-Only if it comes up.

-Right.

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And obviously, I was with you at the, er...at the Radisson.

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-Were you?

-Yeah.

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Thanks, mate.

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It'd just be better for us if we stick to that story.

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-Better?

-For Tamzin.

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And me.

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-OK.

-Great.

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-My notes from the investment conference.

-Thanks, honey.

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Murray.

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Keeley? Hi, did you get my message?

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Just wondering if you're able to bring a cake?

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-Cake?

-Yeah, for Bex's party tonight.

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-You're having a party tonight?

-Yes. Yeah, yeah.

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You're having a party when Bex's moving out?

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-WATER GURGLES Sorry, what?

-Oh, my God.

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-She's not told you she's leaving?

-PRINTER CLATTERS

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-N...not told me what?

-Nothing.

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Nothing to do with me, Murray. You heard nothing from me.

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-Keeley?

-God, I'm such a stupid big mouth.

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Murray, promise me you won't say it was me.

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Keeley, what are you on about?

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Oh, God, I hate myself. I literally want to die.

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Keeley? Keeley?

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Hi, Murray. You wanted to see me?

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-My performance review.

-Oh... Hi, Nereesha.

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Yes, yes, yes, yes, of course. Er...er...

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Can I just say before we start,

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-I know you're going to bring up my recent absenteeism.

-Hm?

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The thing is, the reason I've been off work so much

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is because of a personal problem, which I need to talk to you about.

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Oh! Er...yeah. Well, that's what I'm here for, yeah.

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Thank you, Murray.

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Because in the past, when I've come with personal issues,

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I don't feel management have really listened.

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Sorry, can you hold that thought, Nereesha. I'll be right back, sorry.

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-'Oh...'

-Keeley?

-'Erm, it's Keeley's phone. Leave a message.'

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Keeley, what was all that about? Can you call me back? Please?

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Sorry, Nereesha. Where were we?

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I was just saying that in the past when I've come with a problem,

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I don't feel management have really engaged.

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Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.

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It's almost as if they'd rather be somewhere else.

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Can you hold that thought, Nereesha? I won't be a minute. Sorry.

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-Bex?

-'Hi, this is Bex. Please leave a message.'

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Hi, hon. I've just had a really weird chat with your sister.

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Can you call me...soon? Please?

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Murray.

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-If now is not a good time...

-No, no.

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Like I've always said, you can talk to me any time, you know, 24/7.

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-Thank you.

-Just not now. Sorry.

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-I could get you a cake!

-Sorry?

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Well, I heard you on the phone. Would it help if I got you a cake?

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Oh! That's very kind, but...

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No, I can bring it round to your house for you, to the party.

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I know where you live!

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-Yeah.

-Oh, hi. Abby, yeah.

-HOUSE ALARM RINGS

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Yep, found the keys.

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I'm in.

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So...thanks.

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Now I just need the, erm...the alarm code.

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2009. Year of my divorce from Clifford.

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Make yourself at home.

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But do take your shoes off at the door -

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I have a strict no-shoes policy.

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So...you got out of there. Well done, girl.

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My God, it was hard.

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And then Barney wanted to come.

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-Barney?

-Yeah, the dog.

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You didn't bring it, did you? I've just had new carpets fitted.

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No. No, no. He's at...he's at home.

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Sorry to be a carpet Nazi, but they cost a small fortune.

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Oh, don't put anything on the hall table - it's antique.

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Yeah, no problem.

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God, I can't stop thinking about Murray.

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Think of it as a gift to yourself.

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How was he when you told him?

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I haven't actually, erm, told him yet.

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What?

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I tried writing a note and that didn't work.

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And then I even though about leaving a message on the fridge.

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-What?!

-Well, we've got these magnetic letters...

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You can't leave a message on a fridge.

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You have to be brave and tell him face-to-face.

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You can't just run away.

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Abby!

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Oh, God, got to go.

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Abby? Hi, it's Murray, Bex's other half.

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We met at the Sexual Health Summer Barbecue.

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-Is she around or...?

-It's nothing to do with me.

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-What?

-I'm not getting involved.

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Sorry, involved in what?

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Murray, my support group are waiting.

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Hello, everyone. Sorry I'm late.

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Abby, sorry, I really do need to talk to her, so...

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Oh, hello. Are you joining the group?

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-No, no, thanks. I'm just trying to talk to her.

-OK.

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Well, plenty of time for that later. Let me get you a cup of tea.

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-Oh, no, thanks. I'm fine.

-It's no trouble.

-Really, I'm OK.

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-How do you take your tea?

-I really don't want one.

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-I'm not joining...

-Well, you can always come back when you're ready.

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-Don't need to.

-We're working through our anger issues...

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-Don't have any anger issues.

-Do you take sugar?

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SHOUTING: I don't want a cup of tea!

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Sorry, I, erm...I didn't mean to raise my voice, I...

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I had trouble containing my anger until I joined the group.

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-Murray, the problem is between you and Bex.

-Problem? What Problem?

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I can't discuss it. Will you please just leave?

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I'm not trying to get an audience with the Pope here -

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-I'm just trying to see my wife.

-Abby has requested that you leave.

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-I'd like know where my wife is!

-Come on, let's go.

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Careful, fella.

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Don't push.

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PHONE RINGS Hi, Grant.

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Yes, of course I'm coming. I've invited 20 people, haven't I?

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No, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be abrupt. It's just...

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Can you let yourself in and get cracking?

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I'm not ordering you around,

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I'm just asking you as a friend, you know?

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Because I'm at the hospital, you see.

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Because I've had half my ear bitten off!

0:14:350:14:37

Well, not half exactly - they're looking for it now.

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Look, could you just get going, you know?

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I'll be with you as soon as they've, you know, found my...lobe.

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I'm really sorry about that.

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Oh, it's fine. Don't worry about it.

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We're doing a fingertip search for it now.

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Grant.

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I've put a bag of ice in the freezer.

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Crisps are in the bowls, beers are in the fridge.

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-I think we're in pretty good shape.

-Look, have you seen Bex?

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A thank you would be nice.

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Yes. Sorry, Grant. Yeah, thank you.

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-I basically set the whole party up.

-And I am very grateful.

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-At very short notice.

-Thank you again.

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The fact I had to ask you for a thank you

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diminishes it somewhat, no?

0:15:360:15:37

-Can I just thank you again and move on?

-Please.

0:15:370:15:39

-Let's move on, put it behind us.

-OK. Have you seen Bex?

0:15:390:15:42

-No.

-OK.

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I think we might have a problem.

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Erm...I'm not sure she's coming.

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She seems to be having a slight wobble.

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Well, that would explain the note I found in the bin.

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"Dear, Murray, I'm going away for a bit. Bex."

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Oh, God.

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Maybe that could be the surprise at the party.

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Bex not turning up.

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-Right.

-What are you doing?

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-I'm phoning round, cancelling.

-Oh, great.

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-So, I've arranged a whole party for nothing.

-She's not coming.

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Bit pointless having a party when the person whose party it...

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-Ooh!

-Hello there.

-Hi, Don! It's Murray.

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Hi. Murray! How's it going?

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Oh, yeah. Fine, thanks.

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Actually, it's about tonight's party. Er...

0:16:260:16:29

-KNOCK AT WINDOW

-We're here! Look. Outside!

0:16:290:16:32

-Hm?

-Hiya!

-Hi!

0:16:330:16:35

No, Don, listen, I've got to cancel.

0:16:350:16:37

Open up, Murray. It's chilly out here!

0:16:370:16:40

-It's just not worth it, Paula.

-We've brought Gord and Aud!

0:16:400:16:42

-BOTH:

-Hi!

0:16:420:16:44

Oh, hi, Murray!

0:16:470:16:49

-Oh, God, what happened to your ear?

-Oh, don't worry.

0:16:490:16:51

-Someone bit me. It's fine.

-What?

-Is it septic, Murray?

0:16:510:16:54

My aunt cut herself gardening and they had to amputate her whole hand.

0:16:540:16:57

Don't say that, Paula. Sorry about that, Murray.

0:16:570:17:00

-Gordo, go through, go through.

-Now, look, here's Bex's present.

0:17:000:17:03

Ah, Paula, a slight problem...

0:17:030:17:05

She's going to love it. It's so exciting!

0:17:050:17:07

The one with the cello is our next door neighbour's boy.

0:17:070:17:10

Got a girl pregnant at school.

0:17:100:17:12

We don't know that for sure, Paula.

0:17:120:17:14

Anyway, I thought it might lend the evening a touch of class.

0:17:140:17:17

-Hello, come in. Go through.

-Get yourself a drink.

0:17:170:17:20

Come on, Murray! Get those blinds down.

0:17:200:17:21

We've got 40 people to hide!

0:17:210:17:23

CELLO MUSIC PLAYS

0:17:250:17:31

-What the hell am I going to do?

-Tell them. Tell them the truth.

0:17:310:17:34

Oh! So, stand up in front of all these people

0:17:340:17:36

-and tell them my wife's left me?

-Murray, I'm not going to be able to

0:17:360:17:39

enjoy this party if you keep on at me.

0:17:390:17:41

Where've you been all day?

0:17:410:17:42

Everyone's been running around looking for that memory stick.

0:17:420:17:45

-Emma said you had it, yeah?

-Yeah, yeah, I've got it here. Er...

0:17:450:17:48

Well?

0:17:490:17:51

-Er...it was here.

-Look, give it to me later.

0:17:510:17:53

Oh, hello, sweetheart.

0:17:530:17:55

Here's Tamzin, Murray.

0:17:550:17:56

Yes, yes, of course. Hi there, Tamzin.

0:17:560:17:59

Lovely devils on horsebacks.

0:17:590:18:00

Oh, thank you. Yes, Paula did those.

0:18:000:18:04

Have you tried the spinach tartlets?

0:18:040:18:07

What, no sushi like we had in Edinburgh...last night?

0:18:070:18:10

No? No...no sushi.

0:18:100:18:13

-It was terrific sushi, wasn't it, Murray?

-Yeah.

0:18:130:18:15

-Well, it's a terrific restaurant, isn't it?

-Wakimotos.

0:18:150:18:19

On these trips I prefer to dine out.

0:18:190:18:21

It gets a bit boring just staying in the hotel, doesn't it?

0:18:210:18:23

The Radisson.

0:18:230:18:25

God, look at you two! Finishing each other sentences.

0:18:250:18:29

You know, sometimes I think you two are having an affair!

0:18:290:18:31

EXAGGERATED LAUGHTER

0:18:310:18:35

I will, I will.

0:18:350:18:36

Oh, God, look at the time.

0:18:360:18:38

Everybody, OK! Everybody, listen up!

0:18:380:18:41

It's 7:30. She'll be here any minute.

0:18:410:18:43

You know the drill. Keep it quiet.

0:18:430:18:45

When she walks in the door, we all go, "Surprise!"

0:18:450:18:48

-Don...

-Everybody ready? Turn the lights off.

0:18:480:18:51

No, Don, please. Sorry. Don't turn the lights off.

0:18:510:18:55

There's something I need to explain about tonight.

0:18:550:18:58

-DOORBELL RINGS

-Oh! She's here.

0:18:580:19:00

Go and let her in, Murray. We'll stay here in the dark.

0:19:000:19:03

Quick, quick, quick, lights, lights.

0:19:030:19:04

-Hello, Murray.

-Nereesha?

-I'm sorry to come to your house,

0:19:070:19:10

but you did say you'd be there for me 24/7.

0:19:100:19:13

Yeah, I did say that, but I'm sort of in the middle of something...

0:19:130:19:15

It's just that personal problem I was telling you about.

0:19:150:19:18

-It can probably wait until tomorrow?

-It's a sexual problem.

0:19:180:19:21

Oh, God.

0:19:210:19:22

My husband, Steve, just doesn't share

0:19:220:19:24

my enthusiasm for sexual adventure.

0:19:240:19:26

-ALL:

-Surprise!

0:19:260:19:28

It...it's Nereesha, from the bank. Runs the small business desk.

0:19:310:19:34

A problem in bed with Steve.

0:19:360:19:38

All right?

0:19:380:19:39

OK, lights off again. Everybody ready.

0:19:390:19:42

Don, don't turn the lights off. No.

0:19:420:19:44

We'll lose the surprise factor.

0:19:440:19:45

Don, please, there's something I need to tell you all.

0:19:450:19:49

HE SIGHS Bex isn't coming.

0:19:530:19:55

What, isn't coming?

0:19:550:19:57

-She's left me.

-What?

-Oh, God.

0:19:570:20:00

A message, she's left me...a message.

0:20:010:20:04

You know, a text. Just now, on my...phone,

0:20:040:20:08

er...to say she's having to work late,

0:20:080:20:11

er, because of an emergency.

0:20:110:20:14

Thank God.

0:20:140:20:15

-I thought you were telling us that Bex had left you!

-No.

0:20:150:20:19

-THEY CHUCKLE

-What emergency?

0:20:190:20:22

Oh, erm...a big traffic accident. Motorway pile-up.

0:20:220:20:26

-Which motorway?

-Sorry?

0:20:260:20:29

Which motorway? Alan and Sue haven't got here yet.

0:20:290:20:32

Er, I've forgotten.

0:20:320:20:33

-Look, let me see her text.

-No, I've deleted it.

0:20:330:20:35

You said she only just sent it. Come on!

0:20:350:20:37

The battery on this phone is very poor,

0:20:370:20:39

so I tend just to delete texts as soon as I've read them.

0:20:390:20:42

Very good model otherwise, erm...battery and whatnot.

0:20:440:20:47

But, well, if you are thinking of changing phones,

0:20:470:20:50

the battery deficiencies are perhaps something to bare in mind.

0:20:500:20:54

So, anyway, erm...Bex said that she thinks

0:20:570:21:01

she's going to be tied up at the hospital,

0:21:010:21:03

till the early hours dealing with the...

0:21:030:21:06

-Oh...

-ALL:

-Surprise!

0:21:060:21:09

She's here! DOG BARKS

0:21:100:21:13

-Hi, everyone.

-You're here!

-Yes.

0:21:140:21:16

What happened to your ear?

0:21:190:21:20

Oh, that. It's...it's fine. Someone bit me.

0:21:200:21:24

Come here.

0:21:240:21:25

Come here, darling. Happy birthday!

0:21:270:21:31

Murray.

0:21:360:21:38

God, I was really worried.

0:21:380:21:39

I mean, you know, I've been leaving messages all day,

0:21:390:21:42

and then Keeley said something really weird about moving out

0:21:420:21:45

and Abby, I mean...

0:21:450:21:47

What's this note all about?

0:21:470:21:50

Look, Murray, this isn't easy for me, but...

0:21:500:21:52

I've been practising this speech all day.

0:21:540:21:56

-I can't remember any of it now.

-Speech? What speech?

0:21:560:21:59

-Soil.

-Soil?

0:21:590:22:01

I...I feel our marriage, it's rooted in the wrong...soil.

0:22:010:22:06

No, I've gone again.

0:22:080:22:09

I'm not really following you, sweetie.

0:22:090:22:11

-I feel that the soil...

-CHAMPAGNE BOTTLE POPS

0:22:110:22:13

-THEY CHEER

-..I've been in...has...

0:22:130:22:15

has not been assisting my...my...well, my growing.

0:22:150:22:19

Could we just drop the whole soil thing?

0:22:190:22:21

-I've moved in with Abby.

-What?

-Yeah, I know. I'm sorry.

0:22:210:22:24

-Murray!

-Is this about missing your birthday breakfast or...?

0:22:240:22:27

Well, yeah. No.

0:22:270:22:28

Look, the truth is, Murray, you're never around.

0:22:280:22:31

You're too busy with everyone else.

0:22:310:22:33

Murray, people are getting thirsty!

0:22:330:22:35

Oh, sorry, Don. Be right with you.

0:22:350:22:37

Although, I am actually with Bex at the moment, so perhaps...

0:22:370:22:39

Come on, you two. You're missing the party.

0:22:390:22:41

-We want to make a toast!

-OK. All right, Dad.

0:22:410:22:43

Look, you're in Bilbao next week.

0:22:460:22:49

The following weekend you're at a Two Peaks cycling challenge,

0:22:490:22:52

then you're off on a murder mystery weekend with Grant.

0:22:520:22:54

-Ooh!

-Sorry.

-Oh, hi, Murray.

0:22:540:22:57

Ooh, sorry, am I interrupting something?

0:22:570:22:59

-Oh, no, no! Everything's good.

-Yeah, it's fine. I'm was leaving.

0:22:590:23:02

Just... Actually, Bex, could we just talk about this?

0:23:020:23:05

Actually, can I just have a quick word?

0:23:050:23:06

Sorry, Tamzin, it's not...

0:23:060:23:08

It's just, that you know I was joking earlier

0:23:080:23:10

about Curtis seeing someone else.

0:23:100:23:12

Thing is, I reckon he is.

0:23:120:23:13

-I really can't comment on that.

-So he is.

0:23:130:23:15

-What makes you say that?

-The look on your face.

0:23:150:23:18

-Bex?

-Murray, I've put the candles on the cake,

0:23:200:23:23

-but I've probably done it all wrong.

-Oh, no, Keeley, you've done great.

0:23:230:23:26

Murray, there's somebody here with another cake!

0:23:260:23:28

-Wow.

-Hello, Murray.

-Emma, hello!

0:23:300:23:32

Oh! Oh, you've got two cakes, Bex. Isn't that great?!

0:23:320:23:35

Oh, yes, yes.

0:23:350:23:37

-It's carrot cake - your favourite.

-Thank you, Emma.

0:23:370:23:39

Er, this is Emma, everybody.

0:23:390:23:41

Someone else from the small business desk.

0:23:410:23:44

There's two cakes, everyone!

0:23:440:23:45

Carrot cake and... Er, what's this one, Keeley?

0:23:450:23:48

-It's carrot cake.

-Carrot cake! There we go.

0:23:480:23:50

Murray. I can't actually do this.

0:23:500:23:53

Ooh! Come on, you two! Photo together.

0:23:530:23:55

Right, over here, in front of the orchestra.

0:23:550:23:57

What's wrong with you, Bex?! Give him a kiss!

0:24:010:24:04

Kiss, kiss...

0:24:040:24:06

-ALL CHANTING:

-Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss...

0:24:060:24:09

-Hey-hey!

-THEY CHEER

0:24:090:24:11

Er, right, let's have some more champagne.

0:24:110:24:13

Grant, could you...? And play some music. Yeah.

0:24:130:24:16

Trying to have a party here. Hey-hey!

0:24:160:24:18

Ladies and gentlemen, ladies...

0:24:180:24:20

Stop the music! Stop the music!

0:24:200:24:22

Can I just say what a lovely idea this party is.

0:24:220:24:26

A round of applause for the son-in-law of my dreams.

0:24:260:24:29

-THEY CHEER

-Well done!

0:24:290:24:32

Ooh! APPLAUSE

0:24:320:24:36

Bex, if I could just add a few words.

0:24:380:24:40

Obviously, you're all here because you love Bex, as I do.

0:24:400:24:44

Erm...in fact, she's been the light of my life

0:24:440:24:47

since the day we got married 12 years ago...

0:24:470:24:49

-And here's to the next 12!

-Yes!

-Absolutely, Don.

0:24:490:24:52

And, er, you know, obviously, like any couple,

0:24:520:24:55

we've had our ups and downs.

0:24:550:24:57

But the key to any successful marriage

0:24:570:25:00

is the ability of both partners to change,

0:25:000:25:03

and I, for one, am changing.

0:25:030:25:04

I mean, I'm changing at work.

0:25:040:25:07

You know, take the management conference in Bilbao next week -

0:25:070:25:11

won't be going.

0:25:110:25:12

I'm changing in other ways.

0:25:120:25:14

I'm meant to be going on a murder mystery weekend

0:25:140:25:17

in Hayward's Heath - not any more.

0:25:170:25:20

It's all about change.

0:25:200:25:21

Life and happiness are all about change, and I am changing.

0:25:210:25:26

Thank you.

0:25:260:25:28

Sorry...no claps.

0:25:280:25:29

Perhaps maybe a toast, Murray.

0:25:310:25:33

Thank you, Paula. Yes, a toast.

0:25:330:25:35

Everyone, please raise your glasses to the beautiful Bex

0:25:350:25:38

and the changing Murray!

0:25:380:25:40

-ALL:

-To...beautiful...Bex...

0:25:410:25:43

-And changing Murray.

-..and changing Murray.

0:25:430:25:45

-Superb speech, Murray!

-Thank you.

0:25:450:25:48

Come on, let's pick it up, pick it up. Play some upbeat Bach.

0:25:480:25:51

Ladies and gentlemen...

0:25:510:25:53

-Stop the music! Stop the music!

-Sorry, sorry. It's me again.

0:25:530:25:57

Murray, you thought you had all the surprises tonight,

0:25:570:26:00

but...the gift that Paula is about to unveil

0:26:000:26:03

is our surprise for the both of you.

0:26:030:26:07

And it gives me great pleasure to present to you

0:26:070:26:09

this luxury beach-side villa on the Turkish Riviera.

0:26:090:26:13

It's my hope that this can be a romantic getaway

0:26:150:26:17

for the both of you for the rest of your lives.

0:26:170:26:20

And that's not all! The adventure starts tonight!

0:26:200:26:23

-Tonight?

-Yeah, the cab's outside.

0:26:230:26:25

Come on! Your flight leaves in two hours!

0:26:250:26:27

I smuggled your passports out last week and booked the tickets.

0:26:270:26:30

I've spoken to Curtis and the hospital -

0:26:300:26:31

you've both got a week's holiday together!

0:26:310:26:34

Wa-hey!

0:26:340:26:36

APPLAUSE

0:26:360:26:39

Right, let's get these bags in.

0:26:420:26:44

Ooh, isn't it exciting?

0:26:460:26:47

You'll get to Izmir in time for breakfast.

0:26:470:26:48

Don't worry - Mehmet will be waiting for you at the other end.

0:26:480:26:51

In you get.

0:26:510:26:53

Now, have a lovely, lovely time.

0:26:530:26:55

-ALL:

-Bye!

0:26:570:27:03

Bye! Stay safe! Bon voyage!

0:27:030:27:06

There's some Turkish festival tonight.

0:27:250:27:27

Mehmet's going to barbecue a goat.

0:27:270:27:28

Bex...you...you've got to tell them what's going on.

0:27:280:27:31

-By the way, did you find that memory stick?

-Er...

0:27:310:27:33

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