Christmas Shopping Not Going Out

# We're not going out

# Not staying in

# Just hanging around With my head in a spin

# But there is no need to scream and shout

# We're not going out

# We are not going out. #

SINISTER LOW NOTE

CHATTER

Ho, ho, ho!

CRASH

Well, that wouldn't have happened if somebody knew how to park in a bay properly.

Somebody that shouldn't be allowed behind the wheel of a... Hello!

You want to be more careful. Otherwise next time, you'll be parking over there.

Well, that's a disabled space. Oh, it's a threat. I get it!

Well, as long as you're OK.

Oh, yeah. Don't worry about me. I'm fine.

Oh, God!

-Are you OK?

-Oh, oh! I'm fine. It was only a little bump.

So was that, a few months ago. Now you can barely walk.

-Are you sure it's all right?

-By "it", you mean our baby?

Yeah, all right. Yeah.

I told you, it's not as easy to bond at this stage when you're the father.

It's all right for you. Carrying it around all the time for nine months, everywhere you go,

-feeling it kicking you all the time.

-Yeah, I appreciate I drew the long straw. Just go and pick your dad up.

Oh, and while you're in there, can you get me some Vagisil?

I beg your pardon?

Vagisil.

What the hell is that?

What does it sound like?

Um, character from Game of Thrones?

It is a cream for intimate feminine relief.

I might need it after the baby comes.

I'm not asking for that, my love.

Great. I'll have to come with you, then, won't I?

Why are you bringing the birthing bag?

If baby is due at any minute, this bag stays by my side at all times.

We're going to a department store, not on safari.

-I'd ask for this cream if it had a proper name.

-Like what?

-I don't know.

Thrushblaster 2000?

SINISTER LOW NOTE

SHE PLAYS JINGLE BELLS

OK, I'll meet you in the gift-wrap department in a sec. Oh, and do us a favour, David.

Don't say anything to Lee's dad about Christmas Day tomorrow. He doesn't know.

No, he knows it's Christmas Day,

he just doesn't know you're joining us for lunch.

OK, bye.

There's still time to invite him, you know.

There's still time to put a sprig of holly on him to serve him up as a plum pudding.

It doesn't mean I'm going to do it.

I think you need to start giving him a chance.

I've been giving him a chance my whole life.

It's all right for you. You were brought up properly.

Your parents made you the sweet, well adjusted, slightly anxious,

neurotic, borderline OCD control freak that I love.

But my upbringing was different.

-And cue Hovis music.

-You know what my dad was like.

-He was hardly around.

-Look. Just because your dad wasn't exactly perfect,

it's doesn't mean you won't be.

And anyway, he's making a real effort lately. He's got this job.

And maybe becoming a grandparent is making him

want to gain some self-respect and dignity.

Merry Christmas, son.

Go on - hurry up, Dad, and get changed.

I don't want people seeing you in the car dressed like a pornographic hobbit.

Oh, hello.

Oh, hi.

Brought Lee to visit Santa, have you, Lucy?

Santa has just left, but, er, you can sit on MY knee,

if you like, love.

Oh, um, sorry. Toby and Anna, our neighbours, Frank - Lee's dad.

I know. He's not what you'd expect.

No, he's pretty much exactly what I'd expect.

Hello, everyone.

Hello, Daisy. Didn't expect to see you.

Not going away for Christmas, then?

Yes. Oh, far, far away.

To the land of...parents.

Oh, that's nice.

-Christmas is a time for families to be together. Isn't it, Daisy?

-Yes.

No.

Maybe.

Right, does anyone fancy a Christmas Eve drink?

Well, I don't see why...

I don't see why.

Sorry, we don't have time to go to a bar.

Who says anything about a bar? Come into my grotto.

There's enough booze stacked in here to kill a reindeer.

Is that how you pitch it to the kids?

TANNOY BING-BONGS 'Ladies and gentlemen, just to remind you that

'as it is Christmas Eve, the store will be closing in five minutes.'

SINISTER LOW NOTE

Honestly, we don't have time. Jack's coming home this evening.

-Our two-year-old son. Anna's parents have taken him to Lapland.

-Aw!

-How lovely for him.

-Be a nice break for Anna, too.

-I don't need a break from Jack.

-No, of course not.

Christ, you throw one mug against a wall

and suddenly you're seen as somebody who can't cope.

So - we need to go, Toby. Before the store closes.

Oh, you don't have to worry about that, love.

I've got an arrangement with the security guys.

They'll be over in a minute, when everybody's out and they've locked up.

Actually, last week, they put different guards on who I didn't know.

I ended up having to shimmy up a Christmas tree,

climb into a ventilator shaft and get out over the roof!

Well, why not? Now we know there's an exit strategy.

So, what do you do, Toby?

-I'm a doctor.

-Really?

-Can I show you something?

-No.

-No.

-Drink, Daisy?

-Oh, just a small one for me, thanks, Frank.

I don't want to be drunk for midnight mass.

-I didn't know you were religious.

-Oh, yes.

I'm not one of these people who only celebrates Christmas once a year.

Ah!

'OK, Mike. That's everybody out.

'Just going to do this one final door and we're in lockdown.'

'Mike?'

-So, you're three days late, Lucy? Are you booked in for a sweep?

-A what?

The obstetrician manually draws aside the cervical membranes

to stimulate labour. A sweep.

And if that doesn't work, d'you send Sooty up?

Right, who's ready for the Christmas presents?

I'm fine, thank you.

I actually believe we've lost the true meaning of Christmas.

-These days, it's all about spending money.

-Don't worry about that.

He's nicking them.

Oh, OK, then. Why not!

OK, Mike. I am done. Time for that willing bevvy!

Mike?

Oof!

Aw! Nothing says Christmas quite like a Widowmaker 450 Ping-pong Exterminator.

Oh. A teddy bear. How...nice.

Maybe you can give it to Jack.

Really? I was going to keep it for myself

and give our two-year-old a bread knife this year.

I do have some maternal instincts, you know.

'Kiss my ass'.

Oh! How festive.

That's not an official store present. No, no.

I just keep them on standby in case any of the kids are irritating me.

Yeah, because sometimes a geriatric elf wearing women's tights

and stinking of Special Brew isn't quite traumatising enough.

Oh, a baseball. Just what I've always wanted.

If I was 12 and from Wyoming.

-Sorry, these presents are more aimed at the kiddies.

-Oh, wow!

Craft scissors. How did you know?

-Toby, we need to go - now.

-No, no. We've got to wait for Bill and Mike.

-They've got the keys. It'll all be locked up.

-Well, where are they?

-I don't know. They're taking ages.

-Well, I'm not just waiting in here.

Neither am I.

-Do you play baseball?

-I'm not swapping.

It's locked.

You must have some way of opening it.

Do I look like I've got magical powers?

Hello!

Oh, don't do that. I'm not meant to be here after closing.

-I could lose my job.

-Lose your job?

I'm sorry to break it to you, Dad,

but there's limited opportunities for elves in January.

We need to find these guards now. Bring the bag.

I'm not her husband. I'm her caddie.

You three stay here. I'll just check the first floor.

-You know who I blame for this, don't you? Me.

-Why?

Saves you doing it.

Hello?

Hello! Anyone there?

HE WHISTLES RUDOLF THE RED-NOSED REINDEER

Is that you, Mike?

Just a couple of mince pies. No harm done.

Surely I get a verbal warning first?

Security guards. They're like policeman, aren't they?

Never around when you want one.

No, I mean they're like policeman, aren't they?

Don't worry. I'm sure someone will be along soon.

See?

-Where the hell are these guards?

-We should never have gone for that drink.

It's my dad's fault, as ever.

You can say what you want about Frank, but I bet he would have offered to get Vagisil.

He'd have offered to apply at!

DISCORDANT NOTES

When I say run, run!

All right, when I say waddle, waddle!

DISCORDANT NOTES

SHE GASPS

In here. Quick, phone the police.

-Oh, God.

-It's all right. I think we're safe in here.

MUFFLED GRUNTS

ALL: Mmmmmmm!

Oh, good. You found the security guard, then.

Typical. Running out of sticky tape on Christmas Eve!

No need for any of that with me.

I'll just sit here nice and quiet. My lips are sealed.

Well, they're not, but... I'll shut up.

Um, excuse me.

I was just wondering, um, when you've finished -

and may I say what an excellent job doing, very professional -

when you've finished, you're not going to hurt anybody, are you?

I mean, it's not like we can describe you, or anything.

Long white beard.

Rides around in a sleigh, getaway driver had a bright red nose.

So there's no need for any, um, unnecessary violence.

We won't phone the police.

Play safe. Smash them up.

Honestly, just leave us here.

THEY ALL SCREAM

Mmmm!

What the hell are you doing, telling him to leave us here? Why didn't you tell him I was pregnant?

I'm pretty sure he could see. Unless he thought you'd recently won a trolley dash at Greggs!

Yeah, but you didn't say I was already three days overdue.

I think he had other things on his mind.

Yeah, like smashing up all our phones on your suggestion.

-We're trapped now, you idiot!

-But what about the other security guard?

He's probably out there lying unconscious, as well.

Well, when the other guards turn up for work, they'll let us go.

When's the next shift?

In an hour? Two hours?

In the morning?

You're not telling me the special crack commando unit of Brownie

leaders are the only security on until Boxing Day?

I shouldn't even be here. I should be outside, waiting in the car.

Why couldn't you have just said Vagisil?

It's OK. Toby and Anna's kid is due back from Lapland any minute now.

When the grandparents report these two missing,

the police will trace their phones and find us.

Jack isn't coming home until the 29th.

But you said you couldn't join us for a drink cos you had to get back for him.

-Well, there's a very good reason I said that.

-What?

-I don't like you.

-Nice.

So you sent your child away over Christmas?

-Christmas can be a very stressful time.

-Tell me about it.

How the hell are we going to get out of here?

Mmm! Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm! Mmmm!

What about Daisy's parents?

They'll miss her tonight if she doesn't show up.

-What?

-Can I have the tape back on, please?

Oh, I get it. She's having Christmas with you.

You lied, so you wouldn't have to ask me.

Nice.

What, is anyone expecting you, Frank?

No, I was going to have it at home. Alone.

So no-one is going to miss any of us.

We're trapped in here till Boxing Day.

So do something - quick!

Or you might be delivering this baby with your teeth!

LEE ON TANNOY: 'Robber to R7, Robber to R7.

'Just my little joke there to lighten the tension. Don't worry, I haven't escaped.

'I pressed the Tannoy button with my nose. And everyone else is still bound and gagged.

-LUCY:

-'Let me out, you absolute...'

-TANNOY BING-BONGS

Apart from her. She's not gagged.

Ignore them, please. 'Just go away and leave us alone.'

'Actually, she's not gagged, either. But everyone else is.'

-DAISY:

-'I'm definitely still gagged.'

Anyway, you probably noticed my wife is very heavily pregnant.

In fact, she's three days late already.

I know, it doesn't show, but that's because she's the type where it's all gone on her arse. Whatever.

-LUCY:

-'I'm telling you now, you sick mother...'

-TANNOY BING-BONGS

Will you stop swearing!

Pressing this bing-bong is killing my nose.

For God's sake, stop him!

Hang on, let me finish.

'You can't leave, because...

'..she's just gone into labour.'

Have you completely lost your mind?

-Can you scream convincingly?

-Why not?

I got away with it at the conception.

TANNOY BING-BONGS AND LUCY SCREAMS

'You must have brought it on with the shock you caused.'

So if you do nothing to help, you could be going down for a very, very long time.

LUCY SCREAMS

What the hell are you doing?

There's no way he'll believe Lucy's in labour, you idiot!

He might kill us all!

He's certainly going to wonder why the waters haven't broken.

Well, you'd better think of something. And quick!

-Can you - you know? Wet your dress a bit?

-On demand?

No, Lee, I can't. I happen to have a pelvic floor.

And that's how you know it's her first baby.

Daisy, use that water.

-This is madness, you idiots!

-We're doing this for our baby.

Forget it, Lucy. She's not even bothered about her own kids.

-She's hardly going to empathise with ours.

-How dare you!

I get a little stressed at times, but that does NOT make me a bad mother.

No, but not having Christmas Day with your child does!

So, does not having it with your father make you a bad son?

-That's different.

-Why?

Because a child doesn't just take, take, take, with nothing in return.

You are in for a massive shock when the baby is born.

He's getting closer.

Hurry up!

Oh, sorry. I think this is sparkling water.

I'm sure it'll be fine.

Yeah. I'll just tell him my clacker doubles up as a bloody soda stream!

Where's he gone?

God, I hope we don't live to regret this.

I mean, I hope we do live to regret this.

I mean, I hope we do live to not... regret this.

THEY ALL SCREAM

Argh!

Thank God you're here. The baby is coming.

Isn't that right, doctor?

That seems to be the case.

How frequent are your contractions?

Every ten seconds.

They wouldn't be every ten seconds, Lee.

She's a pregnant woman, not an accordion!

Would you say they're about every three minutes?

I would say that they were about every three minutes.

A clear indication of advanced labour.

Especially given the effervescence of the amniotic fluid.

A sure-fire sign of imminent birth.

Or a very farty baby.

Argh!

You've got to let us go.

ALL: Oh!

Argh!

Stand and deliver!

Hang on. She can't go on her own. She's about to give birth.

Good idea. Take the doctor. But what about me? I'm the father.

Just like the conception - I've got to be there.

Argh!

Please!

-Bring the birthing bag.

-Why?

Because you're having the baby, so we need it.

Very good of you, this.

And don't you worry about us contacting the police when we get out.

We'll be tied up with this little lady for a while.

In fact, you've probably got time for some last-minute Christmas shopping.

In fact, why don't you have a bowl of vegetable crisps on us?

Actually, I think they're off.

The exit's that way.

What?

I think we're supposed to deliver it here.

Then he's going to lock us all up in that room again.

She can't have the baby in here.

Tell him, Doctor. Tell him why she can't have the baby in here.

There's not enough...light.

HE COCKS GUN

He's not letting them go.

When he finds out they're lying, he's coming to get very angry and kill us all.

The only question is in what order.

I reckon he'll get very angry first, and then kill us all.

-He's not going to kill anyone.

-Really?

Try telling your friend that.

He's not dead.

Is he?

Hello?

Are you dead?

Blink once for yes and twice for no.

SHE BLOWS

LUCY EXHALES LIGHTLY

-Do something.

-Like what?

I don't know, you're supposed to be a doctor.

A doctor, yeah, not a conjuror.

There are...complications, aren't there, Doctor?

That's a bloody understatement.

He says this baby is beached.

Breached.

Oh, God.

Yes, breached, which means it's...stuck in the...

U-bend bit.

This woman needs professional help.

You need professional help.

You see? I told you he was dead.

-Harder.

-OK.

MUFFLED SCREAM

TANNOY BING-BONGS

THUD

-OVER TANNOY:

-Well, he wasn't dead, but he might be now.

-Let me check. I'll bite him again.

-Just leave him.

We'll all be dead anyway when that lunatic realises Lucy's faking it.

What does that red light mean on the microphone?

Oh, God! What have I said?!

You said, "We'll all be dead when that lunatic realises Lucy's faking it."

-Turn it off!

-TANNOY BING-BONGS

I hope you're good at your job, Doctor,

cos I'm about to do some serious damage.

LUCY GASPS Hang on.

It's you. From the car park.

I recognise your voice.

Yeah, that's right.

I remember your face, as well.

Green eyes, scar above the cheekbone,

right nostril slightly bigger than the other.

Photographic memory, me. Police artist's dream.

Hey.

Don't worry, Lucy.

He knows when the game's up.

Something tells me he's just going to turn round

and walk straight out of this store.

He's not going to hurt anybody...

HE YELLS

Oh! I was never a good judge of character.

HE YELLS

SMASHING

DRAWERS SMASH

LUCY GASPS

-We've got to help them!

-How?

SMASHING

LUCY GASPS

LUCY BREATHES HEAVILY

HE COCKS GUN

FROM RADIO: It's Christma-a-as!

Well, did the lights go out?

MUSIC: Merry Christmas Everybody by Slade

# Are you hanging up...? #

Oh, God.

# ..a stocking on your wall? #

GUNSHOT AND SMASHING

GUNSHOT

# It's the time that every Santa has a ball... #

GUNSHOT AND SCREAMING

# Does he ride a red-nose reindeer?

# Does he turn up on his sleigh?

# Do the fairies keep him sober for a day?

# So here it is, Merry Christmas

# Everybody's having fun... #

GUNSHOT

# Look to the future now... #

Oh, you and that bloody bag!

# It's only just begun

# Are you waiting for the... #

Stay calm. He can't see us.

# Are you sure you've got the...? #

Can't he?

# Does your granny always tell you

# That the old songs are the best? #

GUNSHOT AND SCREAMING

Well, I can't find the light switch,

but at least I've managed to stop the music.

CRYING

Oh, God!

Shall I see if they've got anything by George Michael?

Christmas shopping, always a nightmare, isn't it?

If you're trying to stop a bullet, can I suggest hiding behind a pan and not a colander?

LIGHT TAP

THEY GASP

COLANDER CLINKS

FOOTSTEPS APPROACH

FAST FOOTSTEPS

FAST HEARTBEAT

OMINOUS MUSIC

DOOR SQUEAKS

OPENS LOUDLY

FASTER HEARTBEAT

LOUD DOOR

FAST HEARTBEAT

OMINOUS MUSIC

FART

COCKS GUN

GUNSHOT

FART

-Ho, ho, ho. Excuse me.

-FART

HE SIGHS

The worst thing is I've got some natural yoghurt at home.

That would have done it.

Instead of the Vagisil.

Oh, I'm sorry, Lucy. I've let you down, and the baby.

See? I'm not father material.

It's my dad's fault, it's in the genes.

Oh, for God's sake, Lee, stop blaming your dad for everything.

Take some responsibility and do something!

DRAMATIC MUSIC

OK.

I need a weapon.

Is that it?

Oh, God, I wish we lived in America!

What are we going to do? I can't run any more!

You don't have to.

We're going to hide you whilst I search for an exit.

Hide me? Where?

Isn't that too obvious?

Don't worry, Lucy. It's the last place he'd think of hiding somebody.

THEY SCREAM

LIFT BEEPS

EVERYONE SCREAMS

HE COCKS GUN

LIFT BEEPS

OMINOUS MUSIC

LIFT MOVING

I sent the lift up with no-one in it. Fooled him.

Yeah, I expect he'll give up and go home after that one(!)

What were you thinking, sneaking up on people dressed like that? You idiot!

You're the idiot. Why the hell did you tell him you could identify him?

To stop you getting beaten up.

-Oh, yeah, I much prefer being shot at, you cretin.

-There you go.

Stop it. We need to get out of here!

I've checked, the whole place is in lockdown.

So what are we going to do? Escape from Psycho Claus up the chimney?

That's it.

Remember?

Last week when Dad got locked in -

he escaped up the Christmas tree and through a vent.

You are not serious.

It'll be fine, Lucy. I promise.

Why not?! It's all in the birthing plan - drinking liquorice tea,

rubbing cocoa butter on the bump,

and climbing a giant bloody Norwegian fir tree

-while Father Christmas tries to assassinate me with a

-BLEEP

-shotgun!

SHOTGUN COCKS LIFT DINGS

HE SHOUTS

Hang on. I've got to go back for Anna.

You're right.

Good luck.

No, Toby's right. God knows what he'll do to the others.

We need to help them.

How are we supposed to do that?

I've had an idea.

But first, we've got to get Lucy to a safe place.

GASPING

Does anyone mind if I say a prayer?

You go ahead, love.

For what we are about to receive...

Not that one.

You'll be safe in here, Lucy.

Yeah, because a grotto full of presents is the last place

you'd think of running into Father Christmas.

-What are you doing?

-I'm burying him.

You mean he's dead?

That's right, Lee, I'm laying this man to his eternal rest

in a pile of polystyrene shavings in a department store grotto.

We can't get him up the Christmas tree,

so the least we can do is hide him while we rescue the others.

So, go on, then, how exactly are we going to do that?

-You're going to cause a distraction.

-A distraction?

Why don't I run round and get him to shoot at me(?)

You've got to be kidding me.

Come on, Lee. You've got this in you, I know you have.

No, I really haven't, Toby

This is not what I do. It's not in my DNA.

You've met my dad, Jean-Claude Van Damn-I've-Wet-Myself.

Do you know what, Lee? Maybe you're right.

Maybe you are the same as your dad. Maybe it is all in the genes.

Maybe our baby will grow up to be exactly the same, too,

and, instead of taking any responsibility, will just

blame you for everything instead.

You don't have to be the same as your father, Lee.

Please.

You're right. I can do this, Lucy.

For you...

and our baby.

And one more thing, Lucy.

Yeah?

Vagisil.

-For the relief of vaginal dryness.

-You've made your point.

Well, that's one way to get Santa's attention.

WHIZZING

GUN COCKS

GUN COCKS

ANNA: What the hell is he doing?

Maybe him and Toby have got a plan.

Toby is many things, but one thing he is not is the sort of person

that runs around acting like he's in some sort of movie.

Here's Johnny!

-FRANK:

-I told you these were quality presents.

Yes, if only you'd wrapped up a couple of helicopters

and a police SWAT team.

Well, we'll know for next year.

What on earth are you doing? Forget him.

Well, we can't just leave him here like a sitting duck.

Don't be stupid, Toby.

-You are leaving him here and you're getting me out.

-Oh, shut up, Anna.

For once in your life, you're doing what I say.

We are taking the guard, we are hiding him, then we are

climbing a 50-foot Christmas tree whether you like it or not.

Do you bloody understand?

And another thing - I'm not going to your sister's house

on New Year's Eve. I don't like her and you can't make me.

Ooh!

Oh, God, please tell me that's trapped wind.

He'll be safe in there.

But he can't lock himself in.

I'll go in and lock it for him.

PARP!

'Oh, that was nasty.'

BULLET RICOCHETS

I love it when a plan comes together.

GUNSHOT

GUNSHOT

GUNSHOTS

This is definitely not part of the birthing plan!

SHE GROANS

All of you, up the tree, now.

GUNSHOT

Me first!

I know the way.

It's up, isn't it?

Yeah.

Remember, just don't look down.

I'm not planning on looking up, either.

LEE: I'm going to get Lucy.

That shutter won't hold him long, so be quick.

Be quick? That's a good idea.

I was planning to stop off at the nail salon!

Come on, Lucy! We're leaving!

Why is the floor wet?

Oh, my God!

-The baby's coming.

-Now?

-Now.

Now as in right now or as in, "I've just got time to climb a Christmas

"tree, crawl through an air vent and run across a roof to safety," now?

RIGHT NOW!

-TOBY:

-Where the hell are they?

Maybe we should go back for them.

Don't be silly. They'll be fine, I'm telling you.

Our Lee's a very brave lad. He gets it from me.

GUNSHOT

AARGH!

AARGH!

-What are you doing?

-I'm looking for the birthing plan!

Screw the birthing plan, I'm having a baby!

SHE SCREAMS

-FRANK:

-This way!

Wait. We can't just leave them.

He's your son, Frank.

Perhaps they've found another way out.

Come on, Toby. You've got your own son to think of.

Frank's right.

We need to start thinking about Jack.

Well, I certainly do.

BABY CRIES

-It's a boy.

-Let me see.

I believe he's a boy, Lee, let me see his face.

Oh.

Hello, my baby.

GUN COCKS

Good at remembering faces, are you?

Well, take one last look at it.

Oh, actually, it's the left nostril that's bigger. See, terrible memory.

CLUNK

THUD

I couldn't just leave my new grandchild here, could I?

Let's have a look at him, then.

Wooargh!

Oops!

Sorry, Bill.

SIRENS WAIL

MUSIC: Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow! by Dean Martin

# Oh, the weather outside is frightful

# But the fire is so delightful

# And since we've no place to go... #

-TOBY:

-OK, that's great. Well, thanks for all your help.

And merry Christmas to you. Bye.

BABY GURGLES

Maybe we should call him Holly.

It's more of a girl's name.

Snowy?

It's more of a rabbit's name.

You were amazing in there.

You just did it - no hospital, no midwife,

and, more importantly...

no birthing plan.

It was easy.

I'm thinking of having the next baby in a straitjacket,

tied up and handcuffed in a barrel whilst going over a waterfall.

What do you mean "next baby"?

I better get going. I might still make it to midnight mass.

Does anyone know what time it starts?

We'd better go, too. We're off to meet Jack.

I thought he was in Lapland.

He is. I've booked us on the next flight.

You should be with your children at Christmas.

That's something I've realised tonight.

And I've realised sometimes you have to stand up for yourself...

Shut up, Toby. We'll miss the plane.

We owe you everything for what you did in there, Dad.

Maybe you should have a little bit more faith in those genes.

I wish I had more faith in these tights.

I'm surprised the police didn't arrest me for shoplifting baubles.

I wish there was some way of repaying you.

BABY FUSSES

Oh, yeah. Dad?

Yes, son, what is it?

Would you do us the honour

of joining us for Christmas dinner tomorrow?

Is that it?

How do you mean?

I thought you were going to name the baby after me.

Oh. I'm sorry, Frank.

We've already decided on Snowy.

PHONE RINGS

Forgot I had this.

BABY FUSSES

# When we finally kiss good night

# How I'll hate going out in the storm

# But if you really grab me tight

# All the way home I'll be warm

# Oh, the fire is slowly dying

# And, my dear, we're still goodbying

# But as long as you love me so

# Let it snow

# Let it snow

# Let it snow. #