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This programme contains some strong language. | 0:00:02 | 0:00:06 | |
All the crew inside locked in. Got the cameraman 'ere. | 0:00:06 | 0:00:10 | |
And we're just saying, yeah, don't forget, | 0:00:10 | 0:00:13 | |
Kurupt FM website coming very soon! | 0:00:13 | 0:00:16 | |
Every business these days needs a website. | 0:00:16 | 0:00:19 | |
Yeah, we're always expanding, getting bigger and bigger every day. | 0:00:19 | 0:00:23 | |
-We're like Japan. -Yeah, next global superpower. So... | 0:00:23 | 0:00:27 | |
Ain't they got a website as well? | 0:00:27 | 0:00:29 | |
Probably what started them off in the first place. | 0:00:29 | 0:00:32 | |
Bigging up Lambrini Bob in Isleworth, | 0:00:32 | 0:00:34 | |
yeah, requesting that AmA (Dub) I sees ya! | 0:00:34 | 0:00:38 | |
Going global is a big opportunity for us, actually, | 0:00:38 | 0:00:41 | |
cos right now we're just UK-based. | 0:00:41 | 0:00:43 | |
Getting more and more fans, like. | 0:00:43 | 0:00:46 | |
Obviously, we've got enough, probably, | 0:00:46 | 0:00:48 | |
but a website will take us to the next level. | 0:00:48 | 0:00:52 | |
Trust me, reaching further! | 0:00:52 | 0:00:54 | |
Hussa! Hussa! | 0:00:54 | 0:00:56 | |
Available from all good internet outlets. | 0:00:56 | 0:00:59 | |
Come on, we're going to be late for school. | 0:01:03 | 0:01:06 | |
If anyone tries to mug you off, you call Daddy, all right? | 0:01:06 | 0:01:10 | |
Big Daddy Grindah. All right, sweet. | 0:01:10 | 0:01:12 | |
Any little mug tries it, | 0:01:12 | 0:01:13 | |
don't care what age they are, they'll get crushed. | 0:01:13 | 0:01:16 | |
Wait, wait, wait. No, no. | 0:01:16 | 0:01:18 | |
It's the diagonal strap there. Let's wait for it. | 0:01:18 | 0:01:22 | |
See you later. | 0:01:22 | 0:01:23 | |
-See you at five. Half three. -Half three? -You lot got it well easy! | 0:01:23 | 0:01:28 | |
Completely different to my day. | 0:01:28 | 0:01:31 | |
HE GRUNTS | 0:01:33 | 0:01:34 | |
-Roche? Rochelle? -Mmm? -Roche? -Mmm? | 0:01:36 | 0:01:40 | |
The washing machine's fucked. | 0:01:40 | 0:01:42 | |
TV IS ON | 0:01:42 | 0:01:44 | |
Well, maybe it's time you tried fixing it, then. | 0:01:45 | 0:01:48 | |
Perhaps you could show Craig as well. | 0:01:48 | 0:01:50 | |
It would be good if he had some basic skills beyond eating | 0:01:50 | 0:01:52 | |
-and playing World War Duty. -Call Of Duty. | 0:01:52 | 0:01:56 | |
Right, cool, I've gotta bounce. I've got a radio meeting about a website. | 0:01:56 | 0:02:00 | |
Craig David, laterz. | 0:02:00 | 0:02:02 | |
-See you later. -Mmmwah! | 0:02:02 | 0:02:03 | |
All right, I'm leaving it with you. Get it sorted. | 0:02:03 | 0:02:05 | |
I'll look at it tonight. | 0:02:05 | 0:02:07 | |
-I've chucked some towels down to soak up the water as well. -What water? | 0:02:07 | 0:02:10 | |
Catch you on the flip side, yeah? | 0:02:10 | 0:02:12 | |
Kevin, what water? | 0:02:12 | 0:02:14 | |
MUSIC POUNDS | 0:02:16 | 0:02:20 | |
HE TOOTS HORN | 0:02:20 | 0:02:21 | |
Mate, the internet is going to be big, right? | 0:02:25 | 0:02:27 | |
Grindah only started believing in the internet cos of all the pornos. | 0:02:27 | 0:02:32 | |
I thought it's got to be good if it's got that! Yeah. | 0:02:32 | 0:02:35 | |
I was saying to Decoy we might have to get a bigger studio, innit? | 0:02:35 | 0:02:38 | |
-Yeah, to deal with all the e-mails and that. -Yeah, exactly. | 0:02:38 | 0:02:42 | |
Probably get Wi-Fi. | 0:02:42 | 0:02:43 | |
-Here? -Yeah. -All right, cool. | 0:02:45 | 0:02:47 | |
MODEM SCREECHES | 0:02:47 | 0:02:50 | |
It's mad, actually, cos we bought the website but it comes blank. | 0:02:52 | 0:02:57 | |
-Yeah, you got to build it yourself, like, sort of like IKEA. -Yeah. | 0:02:57 | 0:03:01 | |
Listen, boys, once I get this up and running | 0:03:01 | 0:03:03 | |
you'll be bigger than Two Girls And One Bloody Bucket. | 0:03:03 | 0:03:06 | |
Have you seen that? It's disgusting. | 0:03:06 | 0:03:08 | |
I showed it to Aldona, she said she's going to leave me. | 0:03:08 | 0:03:11 | |
-Serious, she's leaving you? -No, mate, she is here illegally. | 0:03:11 | 0:03:14 | |
I do all her paperwork and that. | 0:03:14 | 0:03:16 | |
PHONE RINGS | 0:03:16 | 0:03:19 | |
Hello, Gary, mate. | 0:03:19 | 0:03:22 | |
Yeah, still DJ-ing. | 0:03:22 | 0:03:23 | |
Website's not even up, bookings are rolling in. | 0:03:25 | 0:03:27 | |
Wait there one second, mate. | 0:03:27 | 0:03:29 | |
You know Gary and Lisa, yeah? | 0:03:30 | 0:03:32 | |
-They are having a little wedding party and their DJ dropped out. -Yeah? | 0:03:32 | 0:03:36 | |
-Down the social club a couple of hours? -Nah! We don't do weddings! | 0:03:36 | 0:03:40 | |
-It's £200, though. -£200? -Yeah. -So that's... | 0:03:42 | 0:03:46 | |
Between us that'll be... | 0:03:48 | 0:03:50 | |
That'll be all right. | 0:03:50 | 0:03:52 | |
One thing, though, obviously, | 0:03:52 | 0:03:53 | |
cos it's a wedding they don't want an MC, just a DJ. | 0:03:53 | 0:03:56 | |
Well, obviously not, then, if there is no MC. | 0:03:56 | 0:03:58 | |
Yeah, the DJ/MC dynamic is pretty unique, actually. | 0:03:59 | 0:04:03 | |
It's like some Derren Brown sort of shit. | 0:04:03 | 0:04:06 | |
Grindah actually knows what I'm going to play | 0:04:06 | 0:04:08 | |
even before I play it sometimes. | 0:04:08 | 0:04:10 | |
Yeah, it's a bit of a sixth sense of mine, innit? | 0:04:10 | 0:04:13 | |
Also, I pick out our set as well, so that helps a bit. | 0:04:13 | 0:04:17 | |
-Yeah. But we both bring something to the table, though. -Turntable! | 0:04:17 | 0:04:22 | |
What about your music? | 0:04:22 | 0:04:24 | |
Are you going to stream now via the internet and that? | 0:04:24 | 0:04:28 | |
Mate, we're not a...internet radio station. We're very much FM based. | 0:04:28 | 0:04:32 | |
-We're just luring them in. -We're going global, but you will | 0:04:32 | 0:04:36 | |
very much need to be in Brentford to be able to catch Kurupt FM. | 0:04:36 | 0:04:40 | |
We are like a global...local pirate radio station sort of thing. | 0:04:40 | 0:04:46 | |
We're one of the first, actually. | 0:04:46 | 0:04:48 | |
Radio will never be defeated by the internet | 0:04:48 | 0:04:51 | |
cos radio will never die, yeah? You see in apocalypse films, yeah? | 0:04:51 | 0:04:55 | |
At the end of it they are all running around. There's no internet working. | 0:04:55 | 0:04:58 | |
What are they doing? They are checking the radio. | 0:04:58 | 0:05:01 | |
What are they searching for? Messages. | 0:05:01 | 0:05:04 | |
What will be on in the apocalypse? Kurupt FM. | 0:05:04 | 0:05:08 | |
Yeah, so your proxy server, straightaway that's 50 quid. | 0:05:08 | 0:05:11 | |
You're going to need the Intel inside and the Intel outside. | 0:05:11 | 0:05:14 | |
I can do it for you for around 170. | 0:05:15 | 0:05:18 | |
We'll need Intel. | 0:05:20 | 0:05:21 | |
-Get a bit of Pentium in there. -Right. | 0:05:22 | 0:05:25 | |
-Slim a bit off and we'll call it quits. -OK, 165. -Deal. | 0:05:25 | 0:05:29 | |
That's nice. | 0:05:37 | 0:05:38 | |
There's actually, like, a 98p shop up the road, | 0:05:39 | 0:05:42 | |
but I just think here you get a better overall quality of product. | 0:05:42 | 0:05:46 | |
How do you find Angel going to school? | 0:05:47 | 0:05:50 | |
She's still struggling a little bit. | 0:05:50 | 0:05:52 | |
No, I'm not struggling, | 0:05:52 | 0:05:54 | |
I just think that it's unfair to force people to do stuff. | 0:05:54 | 0:05:57 | |
Like, there should be an alternative. | 0:05:57 | 0:05:59 | |
You know, like, grown-ups have the dole, | 0:05:59 | 0:06:01 | |
so why isn't there something they get paid for instead of going to school? | 0:06:01 | 0:06:04 | |
She does need her own mates, though. | 0:06:04 | 0:06:07 | |
She can't just hang around with us her whole life, know what I mean? | 0:06:07 | 0:06:10 | |
Mm. | 0:06:10 | 0:06:11 | |
My mum is still my best friend, like. | 0:06:11 | 0:06:14 | |
Girls her age are all just, like, little two-faced bitches, anyway. | 0:06:14 | 0:06:17 | |
I told her to stay away from them. | 0:06:17 | 0:06:19 | |
So what is good about Angel being at school? | 0:06:19 | 0:06:21 | |
It means I've got more time to organise the house or whatever. | 0:06:21 | 0:06:25 | |
There's just so many different boxes, like. | 0:06:25 | 0:06:27 | |
Can you just imagine how tidy the house could be? | 0:06:27 | 0:06:30 | |
This one's got like a glittery textured top as well, | 0:06:32 | 0:06:35 | |
so that's just a bit more elegant sort of style. | 0:06:35 | 0:06:37 | |
And these ones are amazing value | 0:06:37 | 0:06:39 | |
cos you've got all those little ones in there. | 0:06:39 | 0:06:42 | |
Just get a few more of these. They'll be good for Grindah's lunches. | 0:06:42 | 0:06:45 | |
All right, boys? | 0:06:47 | 0:06:48 | |
How are we going to get that money to pay Chabud? | 0:06:50 | 0:06:52 | |
Do you reckon we'll do that wedding later, bruv? | 0:06:52 | 0:06:56 | |
Nah, I already said we ain't doing it. | 0:06:56 | 0:06:58 | |
We're just going to pick up Angel. | 0:07:02 | 0:07:04 | |
Right, quick in-and-out job, all right? | 0:07:07 | 0:07:10 | |
Daddy's got to get on one, right? I can't stay for long. | 0:07:12 | 0:07:15 | |
Got the whole of the internet to sort out. Why is the door not...? | 0:07:15 | 0:07:19 | |
Why is my leather bean bag over there? | 0:07:19 | 0:07:22 | |
I was just having a sort-out while the house was quiet. | 0:07:22 | 0:07:24 | |
-I don't like it like this! -Hello, baby! Are you all right? | 0:07:24 | 0:07:27 | |
Are you exhausted? You look so tired. | 0:07:27 | 0:07:30 | |
-What are you doing to her? -I'm checking for bruises. | 0:07:30 | 0:07:33 | |
(Such a freak.) | 0:07:33 | 0:07:35 | |
-See you, like, in a bit. -Does it hurt if I do that? | 0:07:35 | 0:07:38 | |
No. | 0:07:38 | 0:07:39 | |
No? OK. | 0:07:39 | 0:07:41 | |
Do you find it hard caring for a family? | 0:07:41 | 0:07:44 | |
It's hard but it's extremely rewarding | 0:07:44 | 0:07:46 | |
when you see the smile on Craig's face when the heating is on, | 0:07:46 | 0:07:49 | |
the electricity is pumping through the house. | 0:07:49 | 0:07:51 | |
The computer's on, like. That's a sense of achievement. | 0:07:51 | 0:07:55 | |
I haven't actually paid the bills yet, | 0:07:55 | 0:07:57 | |
but when I do, I will feel definitely achieved. | 0:07:57 | 0:08:00 | |
Craigy G, what's going on, man? GUNFIRE ON COMPUTER GAME | 0:08:00 | 0:08:03 | |
Do you want to help me do that washing machine? | 0:08:06 | 0:08:09 | |
Nah, Mum said you had to buy a new one. | 0:08:09 | 0:08:12 | |
I'm busy. | 0:08:12 | 0:08:13 | |
Is it? | 0:08:13 | 0:08:15 | |
A'ight. | 0:08:15 | 0:08:16 | |
Probably got homework to do or something. | 0:08:16 | 0:08:18 | |
It just would have been nice to have a little...father...guardian... | 0:08:21 | 0:08:25 | |
son moment... | 0:08:25 | 0:08:28 | |
-Easy, boys. -Chabsy! -What's Gucci? Come in. | 0:08:31 | 0:08:34 | |
Good as gold, sailor. Ready for the big unveiling, yeah? | 0:08:34 | 0:08:38 | |
So, what I've done, I've made some changes to the original plans | 0:08:38 | 0:08:42 | |
that you guys gave me. | 0:08:42 | 0:08:43 | |
-Just using my own internet expertise. -Good, yeah. | 0:08:43 | 0:08:46 | |
Everybody knows that sex sells, yeah? | 0:08:46 | 0:08:49 | |
Trust me, I've bought it many times myself. | 0:08:49 | 0:08:51 | |
-What have we got to do? -You don't have to do anything. | 0:08:51 | 0:08:54 | |
Let me just show you, OK? | 0:08:54 | 0:08:55 | |
I basically took some snaps of my wife, Aldona, who is stunning, yeah? | 0:08:55 | 0:09:00 | |
And I just basically, you know, | 0:09:00 | 0:09:01 | |
put her on there and just maybe sex it up a little bit, you know? | 0:09:01 | 0:09:04 | |
-Yeah, that's right. Is that Aldona? -That's her, yeah. | 0:09:04 | 0:09:07 | |
You can see her Wild Bean cafe. | 0:09:07 | 0:09:08 | |
No, I mean, technically, it's not her vagina. | 0:09:08 | 0:09:11 | |
Hers wasn't the best maintained, so I found another one, | 0:09:11 | 0:09:14 | |
cut and pasted it on. But we do need to talk about the payment. | 0:09:14 | 0:09:17 | |
Don't worry about the payment, we're sorting it. | 0:09:17 | 0:09:20 | |
We've got one of our best boys on the case, innit? | 0:09:20 | 0:09:22 | |
Trust me, on some Oceans 11 type espionage shit. | 0:09:22 | 0:09:25 | |
Down the JC right now, telling him that his nan's flat's flooded, like. | 0:09:25 | 0:09:28 | |
You can get this thing called a crisis loan, yeah? | 0:09:30 | 0:09:33 | |
If you look like you're having a crisis, basically. | 0:09:33 | 0:09:37 | |
Normally I don't bother because they ask me questions | 0:09:37 | 0:09:39 | |
and it's quite intense. | 0:09:39 | 0:09:41 | |
I just do the standard little diary thing, | 0:09:41 | 0:09:43 | |
where you just tell them what you've been doing. | 0:09:43 | 0:09:45 | |
And then they just give you free money, basically. | 0:09:45 | 0:09:49 | |
I got a free laptop as well from... | 0:09:49 | 0:09:51 | |
Cos I gave myself dyslexia from smoking skunk. | 0:09:51 | 0:09:54 | |
Hello. My name is Steven Green. I've had a crisis. | 0:09:58 | 0:10:02 | |
INAUDIBLE REPLY | 0:10:02 | 0:10:04 | |
-So...why do you need the crisis loan? -Eh? Just, the pipe burst. | 0:10:05 | 0:10:12 | |
And I was in there as well. Cos...that's why I wet myself. | 0:10:12 | 0:10:17 | |
Not with the...trousers, with the water... | 0:10:17 | 0:10:20 | |
-Mr Green... -Yeah? | 0:10:21 | 0:10:23 | |
We can only give out these loans to people who have a genuine emergency. | 0:10:23 | 0:10:26 | |
-People who have gone through an ordeal. Understand? -Yeah... Yeah. | 0:10:26 | 0:10:31 | |
Um... | 0:10:31 | 0:10:34 | |
Cos... | 0:10:34 | 0:10:36 | |
I've done that as well. | 0:10:36 | 0:10:37 | |
-Mm-hm? -I've got more crisises... | 0:10:37 | 0:10:40 | |
Cos it's so cold, I can't really think. | 0:10:40 | 0:10:43 | |
-My brain is a little bit, like... -Yes, I understand. | 0:10:43 | 0:10:46 | |
'Kurupt FM does cost a lot of money to run,' | 0:10:46 | 0:10:49 | |
cos everyone here, bar Grindah, has to pay subs. | 0:10:49 | 0:10:53 | |
-Cos what it is, it's promotion for yourselves. -Promotion for yourself. | 0:10:53 | 0:10:57 | |
You pay me a sub to be able to promote yourself. | 0:10:57 | 0:10:59 | |
I've got a tab, though. | 0:10:59 | 0:11:01 | |
I'm heavily in debt to these lot but it's worth it in the end. | 0:11:01 | 0:11:05 | |
-But we let him sleep on our floor, so... -Saves money on rent as well. | 0:11:05 | 0:11:09 | |
-But it is my nan's flat originally. -Doesn't matter, Steve, she's dead. | 0:11:09 | 0:11:13 | |
-Forget about her. -She's not dead, she's moved out. -Move on. | 0:11:13 | 0:11:16 | |
Whatever, she's dead to us. | 0:11:16 | 0:11:18 | |
They were like, just... | 0:11:20 | 0:11:21 | |
"Give me all your money, give me all your stuff." Literally... | 0:11:21 | 0:11:26 | |
Then I got home and the pipes were burst as well, so... | 0:11:26 | 0:11:30 | |
And that is a...? | 0:11:30 | 0:11:31 | |
Yeah... | 0:11:32 | 0:11:34 | |
that's...a gun... | 0:11:34 | 0:11:36 | |
Right. | 0:11:36 | 0:11:37 | |
Well... | 0:11:37 | 0:11:39 | |
Can I get the money now? | 0:11:39 | 0:11:41 | |
I assume you'll be happy to tell this story to the authorities. | 0:11:41 | 0:11:44 | |
Yeah... What authorities? | 0:11:46 | 0:11:49 | |
I'm talking about the police. | 0:11:49 | 0:11:50 | |
-Yeah? -Uh-huh. | 0:11:53 | 0:11:54 | |
Er... | 0:11:59 | 0:12:00 | |
I think I heard... | 0:12:00 | 0:12:01 | |
I'll just chat to the person in reception... | 0:12:01 | 0:12:04 | |
I can even ring them off my phone cos then you lot don't have... | 0:12:04 | 0:12:07 | |
RUNNING FOOTSTEPS | 0:12:07 | 0:12:08 | |
Going global is a... it's an art form, innit? | 0:12:12 | 0:12:16 | |
So we're just starting the global push now. | 0:12:16 | 0:12:18 | |
I don't know how Roche will take to that, actually. | 0:12:18 | 0:12:21 | |
The stress levels are probably going to rocket. | 0:12:21 | 0:12:24 | |
But once I get the money in, it'll be fine. | 0:12:24 | 0:12:27 | |
Once we got the millions, know what I mean? No sweat. | 0:12:27 | 0:12:29 | |
-Roche? -Yeah? | 0:12:29 | 0:12:31 | |
There you go, I've done it. | 0:12:31 | 0:12:32 | |
-What about them screws on the floor? -Don't need screws! No more nails! | 0:12:34 | 0:12:38 | |
You've glued it?! | 0:12:38 | 0:12:40 | |
See, cos I was hoping we could keep the open-close mechanism with | 0:12:40 | 0:12:43 | |
the door, cos it was one of the things I liked about it. | 0:12:43 | 0:12:45 | |
All still fully functional as well, so... | 0:12:45 | 0:12:48 | |
Well... | 0:12:49 | 0:12:51 | |
Yeah... | 0:12:53 | 0:12:55 | |
Definitely gone. | 0:12:55 | 0:12:56 | |
-Well, you're looking at a new door anyway. -£90. | 0:12:57 | 0:13:00 | |
I think there's a screwdriver under there, actually. | 0:13:02 | 0:13:05 | |
-SHE SIGHS £90, yeah? -Yeah! | 0:13:05 | 0:13:07 | |
These things all cost money! | 0:13:07 | 0:13:09 | |
The washing powder costs money! | 0:13:09 | 0:13:11 | |
Your favourite fucking super snuggly fabric softener, | 0:13:11 | 0:13:14 | |
that costs money as well! | 0:13:14 | 0:13:15 | |
Yeah, but I need that, Roche, otherwise I get itchy bollocks. | 0:13:15 | 0:13:18 | |
Get it sorted! I don't care how you do it, just fucking do it! | 0:13:18 | 0:13:21 | |
What do I love about Kevin? Do you know what? | 0:13:24 | 0:13:27 | |
I think it is just his simplicity. And he's really funny. | 0:13:27 | 0:13:31 | |
You know? Like, from time to time... | 0:13:31 | 0:13:34 | |
VEHICLE PULLS UP | 0:13:34 | 0:13:35 | |
That's a big one. | 0:13:35 | 0:13:37 | |
Kevin could do so many things if he just put his mind to it. | 0:13:37 | 0:13:42 | |
If he wasn't twatting about with Grindah. | 0:13:42 | 0:13:45 | |
Which I doubt is his real name. | 0:13:47 | 0:13:49 | |
'Clash of egos, I reckon.' | 0:13:50 | 0:13:52 | |
He's quite powerful and she's quite powerful, | 0:13:52 | 0:13:54 | |
so together... | 0:13:54 | 0:13:57 | |
Like you seen on them documentaries, | 0:13:57 | 0:13:58 | |
when the two hippos are fighting to be the leader of the land? | 0:13:58 | 0:14:02 | |
It's a bit like that but it's not physical. | 0:14:02 | 0:14:05 | |
You lot paying us for this or...? | 0:14:05 | 0:14:07 | |
No, sorry. | 0:14:07 | 0:14:09 | |
-'Hello?' -Hello, Gary, mate - it's Beats here. -'Hiya.' | 0:14:13 | 0:14:15 | |
Er, is the wedding still on? | 0:14:15 | 0:14:17 | |
Call Steves, see if he's got the money. | 0:14:21 | 0:14:26 | |
What's he saying? | 0:14:26 | 0:14:27 | |
It's ringing. | 0:14:27 | 0:14:29 | |
Steves, where... Are you back yet? | 0:14:32 | 0:14:35 | |
No, I can't come back, bruv. I'm hiding. | 0:14:35 | 0:14:36 | |
-I seem to have robbed a cardigan. -What? | 0:14:36 | 0:14:38 | |
-Cardigan, I've robbed a cardigan. -Right. -From the Jobcentre. | 0:14:38 | 0:14:41 | |
-He's saying he's got... -I robbed a cardigan. | 0:14:41 | 0:14:43 | |
-They wouldn't give me money. -He's robbed a cardigan. | 0:14:43 | 0:14:46 | |
-Feds are after me, bruv. Fucking... -And he's hiding from the police. | 0:14:46 | 0:14:49 | |
-Why is the police after him? -I don't think he's got the money, either. | 0:14:49 | 0:14:52 | |
Why are the police after you? Stay hidden! | 0:14:52 | 0:14:56 | |
-No, he's cut. -I knew going global would be intense. | 0:14:56 | 0:14:59 | |
We're fucked. | 0:15:01 | 0:15:03 | |
We might have to do the wedding. | 0:15:05 | 0:15:07 | |
-Is it? -D'you know what - fuck it, call Gaz, we're doing the wedding. | 0:15:07 | 0:15:11 | |
-Er, no... -No, I insist, call him. I've changed my mind, do it. | 0:15:11 | 0:15:14 | |
But I can't cos...earlier I had a text from Roche. | 0:15:14 | 0:15:17 | |
What do you mean? I didn't hear anything. | 0:15:17 | 0:15:19 | |
No, before Steve called, she texted me. | 0:15:19 | 0:15:21 | |
What's the problem? | 0:15:21 | 0:15:23 | |
I've got to baby-sit Craig. | 0:15:23 | 0:15:26 | |
You've got to baby-sit Craig? But he doesn't even move. | 0:15:26 | 0:15:29 | |
Yeah, cos of his stomach disorder, Roche wants me to... | 0:15:29 | 0:15:32 | |
Do you know what, yeah? | 0:15:32 | 0:15:34 | |
Don't worry, bruv, cos I'll just get Steves or Decoy or | 0:15:34 | 0:15:37 | |
someone else to do it, like, if you can't be a man, like. | 0:15:37 | 0:15:41 | |
But what about the MC/DJ dynamic? | 0:15:41 | 0:15:43 | |
-Too late, mate. -Boys, boys, boys, boys, boys. | 0:15:43 | 0:15:46 | |
-I think there might be another way. -Yeah? -Yeah. | 0:15:46 | 0:15:49 | |
Yeah, let's definitely do the other way, then. | 0:15:49 | 0:15:51 | |
What? No, what is the other way? | 0:15:51 | 0:15:53 | |
OK, check it out, yeah - a special Chabuddy G Kurupt FM radio show. | 0:15:53 | 0:15:58 | |
-A DJ set? -Yeah. | 0:16:01 | 0:16:03 | |
-Oh, for f... -Cos like, think about it, yeah, look. | 0:16:03 | 0:16:05 | |
I've got the vinyls, yeah, I've got the Terry Wogan sex appeal, | 0:16:05 | 0:16:08 | |
I'm in my prime, yeah? | 0:16:08 | 0:16:10 | |
OK, give me a couple of hours on Kurupt FM | 0:16:10 | 0:16:12 | |
and I will completely waive the website fee for you guys. | 0:16:12 | 0:16:15 | |
-Sounds like a good idea to me. -It sounds shit. | 0:16:15 | 0:16:19 | |
You don't want to be associated with weddings and that, do you? | 0:16:19 | 0:16:22 | |
-Come on. -No. -You know, exactly. | 0:16:22 | 0:16:24 | |
Do you know what I mean, like, it's not what I got in the game and that, | 0:16:26 | 0:16:29 | |
like, to give away sets to some John, like, do you know what I mean? | 0:16:29 | 0:16:32 | |
-You're back? -What? -Come and look what I've done to the kitchen. | 0:16:32 | 0:16:35 | |
-No, I'll look later. -What's wrong with him? | 0:16:35 | 0:16:37 | |
Don't worry about him, he's just worried about radio, innit? | 0:16:37 | 0:16:40 | |
Do you want a cup of tea or anything? | 0:16:40 | 0:16:42 | |
Er, yeah, the tea bags are in that, um, that box by the kettle. | 0:16:42 | 0:16:46 | |
New boxes, yeah? | 0:16:46 | 0:16:47 | |
Yeah, like, basically, today I've just been putting all the different | 0:16:47 | 0:16:51 | |
foods into, like, these boxes, and, like, the food colour matches | 0:16:51 | 0:16:54 | |
the lid colour so it's just like a little thing I just thought I'd do. | 0:16:54 | 0:16:57 | |
-Yeah. -Just spruce the house up a bit. -Nice. So is there milk in... | 0:16:57 | 0:17:01 | |
-Yeah, that's white for milk in there. -Oh, right. -Yeah. | 0:17:01 | 0:17:03 | |
-But no milk for me, if that's all right. -No? | 0:17:05 | 0:17:08 | |
-Decoy knows how I like it. -Black. Well, without milk. | 0:17:08 | 0:17:12 | |
MUSIC PLAYS | 0:17:17 | 0:17:19 | |
Good... | 0:17:19 | 0:17:20 | |
Good evening, Hounslow, and welcome to midnight music masala with me, | 0:17:22 | 0:17:28 | |
your host, DJ Vinyl Destination. | 0:17:28 | 0:17:30 | |
And how are you? | 0:17:33 | 0:17:35 | |
I'm fine. | 0:17:35 | 0:17:37 | |
Right now, you're listening to the sounds of... | 0:17:37 | 0:17:40 | |
er, I can't read it cos it's going really fast, but, you know what? | 0:17:40 | 0:17:44 | |
I'm actually getting really excited now. | 0:17:44 | 0:17:46 | |
MUSIC PLAYS | 0:17:48 | 0:17:50 | |
KNOCK ON DOOR | 0:17:50 | 0:17:51 | |
Easy. | 0:17:56 | 0:17:58 | |
-All right, mate. -Hey, how you doing, you all right? -You all right? | 0:17:58 | 0:18:01 | |
Yeah, good, mate. Come on through. | 0:18:01 | 0:18:04 | |
Decoy! | 0:18:04 | 0:18:06 | |
Cool, man, can you get on the decks, yeah? | 0:18:06 | 0:18:10 | |
-My DJ set. -Come on. | 0:18:10 | 0:18:11 | |
RECORD ENDS | 0:18:11 | 0:18:13 | |
-Start now, yeah? -Sweet. Well done, Decoy. | 0:18:13 | 0:18:16 | |
-All right, mate, can you hurry up? -Decoy, well done, mate. | 0:18:18 | 0:18:21 | |
OK, just get yourself set up. Come on. | 0:18:21 | 0:18:22 | |
Come on, Decoy, out the way. | 0:18:22 | 0:18:24 | |
All right, people, big it up - DJ Decoy inside, yeah, | 0:18:24 | 0:18:28 | |
smash the set, brother. | 0:18:28 | 0:18:29 | |
You're locked into the London's leading Kurupt FM 108.9 right now. | 0:18:29 | 0:18:34 | |
Next up, we have special guest DJ for one night only, goes by the... | 0:18:34 | 0:18:38 | |
-What's your DJ name? -Cheers, mate. | 0:18:38 | 0:18:40 | |
-Let me. I'll get the mic. -Just, here you go. | 0:18:40 | 0:18:44 | |
All right, just a special announcement for us. | 0:18:44 | 0:18:48 | |
'You're now listening to DJ Vinyl Destination, | 0:18:48 | 0:18:51 | |
'sponsored by Chabuddy Worldwide Internet Cafe Cabin.' | 0:18:51 | 0:18:53 | |
-That's a bit much, innit? -Don't really need an intro. | 0:18:53 | 0:18:57 | |
Just part of the set. All right. | 0:18:57 | 0:19:00 | |
Can you turn that one up then, mate? | 0:19:00 | 0:19:04 | |
MUSIC PLAYS | 0:19:04 | 0:19:08 | |
There's singing all over it, Chabs. | 0:19:16 | 0:19:18 | |
It's not, Chabs, it's DJ Vinyl Destination. | 0:19:18 | 0:19:20 | |
Whatever, DJ fucking Destination, man, | 0:19:20 | 0:19:23 | |
there's singing all over the shit - I can't do my MC'ing. | 0:19:23 | 0:19:25 | |
-Yeah. -Huh? What do you mean, yeah? -Yeah, it's sick, this. | 0:19:25 | 0:19:28 | |
No, it's...oh, just fuck it. | 0:19:28 | 0:19:32 | |
Just hurry up, yeah, hurry up. | 0:19:32 | 0:19:35 | |
MUSIC PLAYS | 0:19:38 | 0:19:42 | |
MUSIC DROWNS OUT SPEECH | 0:19:42 | 0:19:46 | |
MUSIC DROWNS OUT SPEECH | 0:19:52 | 0:19:54 | |
D'you hear someone knocking? | 0:19:54 | 0:19:55 | |
-Chabsy. -Yeah, boss? | 0:20:05 | 0:20:06 | |
Absolutely hit it, mate. You didn't say you could do it...yeah, yeah. | 0:20:06 | 0:20:10 | |
Keep doing it, keep doing what you're doing. | 0:20:10 | 0:20:13 | |
-Play whatever you want, yeah? -Yeah? | 0:20:13 | 0:20:15 | |
We're popping out, see you later, mate. | 0:20:15 | 0:20:17 | |
-There's some of my stuff, man. Just take all you need, yeah. -Yeah. | 0:20:17 | 0:20:20 | |
Don't worry, yeah, don't worry, I've got this, I've got this, yeah. | 0:20:20 | 0:20:23 | |
I'm about to tear these suckers a new ear hole. | 0:20:23 | 0:20:25 | |
All right, mate, see you later. | 0:20:27 | 0:20:29 | |
MUSIC PLAYS | 0:20:29 | 0:20:32 | |
I will literally do anything it takes to keep Kurupt FM going, | 0:20:38 | 0:20:42 | |
yeah, and so would Beats. | 0:20:42 | 0:20:44 | |
Like, to me, there's two types of people in this world - | 0:20:44 | 0:20:48 | |
you've got the layabouts, yeah, the people that do nothing, | 0:20:48 | 0:20:50 | |
and then you've got the doers. | 0:20:50 | 0:20:52 | |
Think it's pretty obvious which one of them I am, | 0:20:54 | 0:20:57 | |
I mean, I'm on a fucking roof, so... | 0:20:57 | 0:20:59 | |
He's going to love this, innit? Innit? | 0:21:06 | 0:21:09 | |
-Where's...where's Beats, like? -He ain't here. | 0:21:15 | 0:21:19 | |
-What do you mean, he ain't here? He's baby-sitting you. -No. | 0:21:19 | 0:21:22 | |
It's all right, love, I've got it, go on. | 0:21:22 | 0:21:24 | |
Does he look like he needs baby-sitting? He weighs 18 stone. | 0:21:24 | 0:21:27 | |
Well, where is he, then? Cos, like, it's, like...Beats! | 0:21:27 | 0:21:31 | |
He's gone to that wedding. | 0:21:31 | 0:21:32 | |
-He's...he hasn't gone to that wedding, cos we... -He has. | 0:21:32 | 0:21:35 | |
-No, he hasn't, cos we've agreed... -No, he has. -No, we agreed | 0:21:35 | 0:21:37 | |
he wasn't doing it, and he would never go without me, so... | 0:21:37 | 0:21:40 | |
OK, well, he has. So is that it? | 0:21:40 | 0:21:41 | |
Is this little grannies' meeting over? | 0:21:41 | 0:21:44 | |
-You're the only granny round here. -What did you say? -Go! | 0:21:44 | 0:21:47 | |
MUSIC PLAYS | 0:21:52 | 0:21:55 | |
Fucking hell. | 0:22:17 | 0:22:19 | |
Stevie. | 0:22:19 | 0:22:20 | |
You know what, Decoy's got some proper good tunes and that, man. | 0:22:20 | 0:22:24 | |
Steves, any requests? | 0:22:24 | 0:22:26 | |
A bit of gabba, bruv. Just out of that little blue bag. | 0:22:26 | 0:22:29 | |
Blue bag. Gabba, yeah? | 0:22:29 | 0:22:31 | |
MUSIC: "Reach For The Sky" by S Club 7 | 0:22:34 | 0:22:39 | |
MUSIC: "Dreams" by Gabrielle | 0:22:55 | 0:22:59 | |
Thought I might find you here. | 0:23:22 | 0:23:24 | |
-Bruv. -I know exactly what's going on. | 0:23:24 | 0:23:26 | |
I know, it's only because... | 0:23:27 | 0:23:30 | |
I've got to hand it to you, mate, you're a crafty little fucker. | 0:23:30 | 0:23:34 | |
I know. | 0:23:34 | 0:23:35 | |
You saw all this coming, didn't ya? | 0:23:35 | 0:23:38 | |
Huh? | 0:23:38 | 0:23:40 | |
You're willing to put yourself on the line, put yourself | 0:23:40 | 0:23:42 | |
through all of this, just to get us out of debt with Chabuds. | 0:23:42 | 0:23:45 | |
I was, yeah, exactly, cos I thought I'd just do this... | 0:23:45 | 0:23:48 | |
-Yeah. -Cos I knew you wouldn't really want to come down here and that, | 0:23:48 | 0:23:51 | |
so, yeah. | 0:23:51 | 0:23:53 | |
Done it for the station. | 0:23:53 | 0:23:55 | |
Exactly. | 0:23:55 | 0:23:56 | |
I shouldn't have underestimated you, mate. | 0:23:59 | 0:24:01 | |
I'll tell you what, pop a little garage on and let's show them | 0:24:01 | 0:24:06 | |
how it's really done. | 0:24:06 | 0:24:08 | |
I don't know if that's their kind of thing, though. | 0:24:08 | 0:24:11 | |
Grindah will always be there for me no matter what. | 0:24:11 | 0:24:14 | |
He's my best friend. We've done everything together | 0:24:14 | 0:24:17 | |
since we were, like, that big, do you know what I mean? | 0:24:17 | 0:24:19 | |
So, like, if she kicked me out, I could just go and stay at his | 0:24:19 | 0:24:23 | |
and he wouldn't say anything. He'd welcome me in with open arms, | 0:24:23 | 0:24:26 | |
say, "Look, there's a sofa there," do you know what I mean? | 0:24:26 | 0:24:29 | |
"Here's a Zoo, chill out." | 0:24:29 | 0:24:31 | |
GARAGE MUSIC PLAYS | 0:24:31 | 0:24:36 | |
# Get out the way! Get out the way! | 0:24:36 | 0:24:38 | |
# Fuck, he's getting shot, bang, bang, bang. Get out the way! | 0:24:38 | 0:24:41 | |
# Get out the way! | 0:24:41 | 0:24:42 | |
# Someone's getting shot! Who? Bang, bang, bang. | 0:24:42 | 0:24:45 | |
# Yeah! Look at them... # | 0:24:45 | 0:24:48 | |
This is a great idea. What was you worried about? | 0:24:48 | 0:24:50 | |
Yeah. | 0:24:50 | 0:24:51 | |
It's just to pay for the equipment, it doesn't even cover my cost. | 0:24:51 | 0:24:55 | |
So, cheers, mate. They're saying we can't go back in. | 0:24:55 | 0:24:57 | |
Lisa's nan was crying before I even got there. They loved it. | 0:24:57 | 0:25:01 | |
You see that little kid? He was loving it as well. | 0:25:01 | 0:25:03 | |
-Yeah, he was loving it. -Still got paid, though. | 0:25:03 | 0:25:05 | |
I was going to say about the pay - | 0:25:05 | 0:25:07 | |
how much have we got to give Chabuds? Cos I was hoping... | 0:25:07 | 0:25:09 | |
That's the beauty of it - worry not, because I unplugged the transmitter. | 0:25:09 | 0:25:12 | |
He still thinks he done the set. | 0:25:12 | 0:25:14 | |
Hey, I might go back, yeah - get us back on air, innit? | 0:25:14 | 0:25:16 | |
Yeah, someone should do that, sweet. In a bit, yeah, nice one, in a bit. | 0:25:16 | 0:25:20 | |
So do I get to keep the money, yeah? | 0:25:20 | 0:25:22 | |
Yeah, of course we can. Hundred each. So, five minutes' work, | 0:25:22 | 0:25:25 | |
-it's the beauty of the game for ya. -Yeah, go on, do a little... | 0:25:25 | 0:25:27 | |
Uh, smell it, smell it. | 0:25:27 | 0:25:29 | |
-Ah, smells like... -Real, it's real cash. -Yeah. | 0:25:29 | 0:25:31 | |
Dirty cash but...well, it's not, but... | 0:25:31 | 0:25:33 | |
-That's legit, that. -That's legit so. Squat down, get a good shot. | 0:25:33 | 0:25:38 | |
You know, you want to dash it all up in the air like this and move it. | 0:25:38 | 0:25:41 | |
Well, don't, cos half of that's mine. | 0:25:41 | 0:25:43 | |
Yeah, all right, just... did you get that? | 0:25:43 | 0:25:47 | |
Nice, nice. | 0:25:47 | 0:25:48 | |
40, 60, 80. Cheers, mate. | 0:25:50 | 0:25:53 | |
-Sweet. -Look at that, that is proper money that, as well. | 0:25:53 | 0:25:57 | |
That's a honest day's work, £100, all mine. | 0:25:57 | 0:26:00 | |
I'm a proper man now, got responsibilities, | 0:26:00 | 0:26:03 | |
you lot should try that sort of shit, it's rewarding. | 0:26:03 | 0:26:05 | |
Bless up, yeah. | 0:26:05 | 0:26:07 | |
MUSIC PLAYS | 0:26:07 | 0:26:11 | |
There's a oner for the washing machine there, so... | 0:26:22 | 0:26:25 | |
There's a little bit extra, treat yourself, get a little dress. | 0:26:25 | 0:26:28 | |
Or some army shorts or whatever. | 0:26:28 | 0:26:30 | |
I'm going to shoot up. | 0:26:30 | 0:26:32 | |
Yeah, Craig - give it half an hour, yeah? | 0:26:32 | 0:26:34 | |
MUSIC PLAYS | 0:26:37 | 0:26:40 | |
Kurupt FM will never die, yeah, and neither will we, like. | 0:26:41 | 0:26:45 | |
We're like dragons. | 0:26:45 | 0:26:47 | |
Well, no, we're not, cos dragons don't exist. | 0:26:47 | 0:26:49 | |
A dinosaur or a T rex. | 0:26:49 | 0:26:51 | |
Well, no, cos the T rex would be me | 0:26:51 | 0:26:54 | |
cos there's only one T rex. | 0:26:54 | 0:26:56 | |
I'll probably be one of them - you know them long ones | 0:26:56 | 0:26:59 | |
with the big necks, like, just gazing across Jurassic Park. | 0:26:59 | 0:27:02 | |
-Bare grass, like. -Doesn't have to be Jurassic Park. | 0:27:02 | 0:27:08 | |
Screens. | 0:27:08 | 0:27:11 | |
When I die, yeah, I'll just be, like, frozen in time | 0:27:11 | 0:27:17 | |
with one hand on my headphones, | 0:27:17 | 0:27:20 | |
one hand upon decks, staring into the mixer, | 0:27:20 | 0:27:23 | |
just enjoying music, like, dying for the cause, like. | 0:27:23 | 0:27:27 | |
When I...when I die, actually, I'll be in a massive mausoleum, | 0:27:27 | 0:27:31 | |
like, frozen with a mic in my hand, mouth open | 0:27:31 | 0:27:36 | |
cos I've been screaming my last lyrics to my last dying breath. | 0:27:36 | 0:27:42 | |
Kurupt FM. | 0:27:42 | 0:27:44 | |
Viva for ever. | 0:27:44 | 0:27:45 |