Episode 8 The Real Hustle

This is The Real Hustle, New Recruits.

The Hustlers are back, and this time

they've brought in two new faces to help them with their scams.

New recruits Polly

and Jazz

join original Hustlers Paul, Jess and Alex.

Working together as a team they'll carry out scams

that are more cunning and devious than ever before.

On tonight's show, somebody isn't happy.

SHOUTING AND BANGING

-Alex surprises himself.

-It does work!

And Colin Murray gives this guy the game of his life.

I can't be that unlucky.

The Hustlers have invited celebrity friends to help them with their scams.

They'll be thrown in at the deep end, no training and no practise, just straight in.

Today's celebrity guest hustler is an award-winning radio and TV presenter

and keen poker player, Colin Murray.

I've no idea what's coming my way, but I know it's going to be

deliciously deceptive, a license to cheat.

I don't think there's anyone who has ever been born in Ireland

that didn't have a little modicum of hustle in them.

Colin's full of confidence, but he hasn't been briefed on the scam yet.

All he's been told is to wait on a park bench

and await further instructions.

Here comes a young lady to fill him in.

-Hello.

-Hello.

-Colin?

-Yes.

-I'm Jessica.

-Nice to meet you.

-Excited?

-Very.

-Nervous?

-I'd say buzzing.

-Excellent!

-How's your poker face?

-Brilliant.

-Let me tell you about what we are going to do.

-You're going to be the journalist of a poker magazine.

-OK.

Your job today is to rope in the mark and persuade them to join you in a poker game.

This game is theirs, and to really dig deep in their pockets and pay as much as they can.

-You up for it?

-Yeah!

-You ready?

-Yeah!

-Come on, then.

Colin's a keen poker player and will be right in his element,

but he's never played a card game like the one he will today in...

The Cross.

Alex has arranged to meet some poker players at a trendy bar,

inviting them to play in a private game he's organised for later this evening.

Paul is playing the role of another player invited to the game,

and takes a seat inside whilst Alex keeps an eye out for the mark.

And here he is, right on time.

Hello, how are you doing? You all right? One of the guys is here.

Alex brings the mark and his mate in to meet Paul,

then leaves them alone to get to know each other.

-How are you, Nick?

-Sorting the stuff downstairs, table and everything, should be ready to go soon.

-OK.

Where do you boys play? In the Vic, yeah? Haven't been there in ages.

You know the poker magazine guy is coming tonight? You know about this guy?

This guy is coming from a new poker magazine who is doing an article on,

I guess, private games, stuff like that.

It's a new magazine, it's called Poker something,

I can't remember what. It's brand new, literally.

Paul is being a little vague, almost as if he's making it up on the spot.

So when you play, do you play any side games, any side bets?

Right, do you play Kalooki or backgammon or anything like that?

Really?

That's music to Paul's ears.

The guy's going to do an article about that kind of thing, games you can win.

I'm going to show him Nim before we play tonight, ever heard of Nim?

Do it with straws, matchsticks, doesn't matter, but you can only

take one, two or three, and whoever's left with the last one's the loser.

For the first part of the scam,

Paul needs to persuade the mark to do him a favour.

He wants to play a trick on the poker journalist that's about

to arrive by challenging him to a game he's guaranteed to loose.

Thing is, if you know the secret, you can always win.

If I have him bet with you, would you bet against him?

Knowing that I'm going to win. In other words, I'm playing for you.

All right. I need you to sneak a bottle cap onto the table when he's not looking.

You'll get the idea when he comes in, it's just easier if someone else does it.

The mark agrees to help Paul play a trick on the journalist.

And here he is, it's Colin.

-You Rob?

-I'm Rob.

-Sorry. Nice to see you.

-Colin?

-Yeah.

-I'm Nick.

-Nick, how you doing?

Alex, who's posing as a member of staff for the bar,

brings a box full of bottle caps for their game of Nim.

That's fine. Yeah. I brought this thing to show you.

All you have to do is take one, two or three caps.

Whoever ends up with the last cap is the loser. Here's the idea.

I'll play against you, you can bet against one of these guys.

-I'll bet with you.

-OK.

It's a simple game, each player takes a turn removing

one, two or three caps.

The player to take the last caps loses and sure enough, Paul wins.

-That's yours, that means you owe him a tenner!

-OK.

The exact number of caps mean Paul will always be able to leave one behind IF Colin goes first.

-You go first.

-I go first?

-Aye.

But this time, Paul goes first. Now he'll lose unless the mark adds that extra bottle top.

Pick your jacket up, though.

Colin pretends to be distracted,

giving the mark the perfect opportunity.

I'll take over here. First one.

LAUGHTER

And Colin loses again.

Paul comes clean about the little scam.

-When you were looking away...

-You dirty dog!

He snuck in an extra one, right? When he puts an extra one in,

-I just take that one away, so you're still going first.

-That's brilliant.

This whole scenario has been carefully crafted to suck the mark in.

He's demonstrated he's willing to play a prank by cheating.

And he's been rewarded by making money on the bets.

Colin's now going to ask him to cheat in a slightly bigger way.

This is an interesting one, because the article after the game is meant

to be written from the point of how the game could have been cheated.

We're doing a whole issue on what you need to watch out for when you're playing.

Yeah, stuff like that, dealing off the bottom.

I've a proposition for you.

Let's cheat the game properly and I'll cover the boys who loose.

If I could actually interview people

who were in on cheating the people out of money but I guarantee

the people who lose money, I give them all their money back tomorrow?

And you two keep what you win. I think that's awesome

to be involved in, and you can be talking about being in on it.

So long as they get their money back.

What do you mean, get money back, they get to star in a new magazine! It's perfect!

So the game will be rigged in the mark's favour for the article.

He can keep the winnings, and Colin will reimburse the losers.

-Who's going to win, one, two, three, four or five?

-Three.

Paul demonstrates how he can control the cards whenever it's his deal.

Hand three, right?

-Holy BEEP!

-I should usually win.

It's one of those things that looks easy and if I did it I'd hit you in the face with the cards.

Must have taken some practise.

It's easier to give you the ace if it never moves from the top, look.

It's easy to keep dealing.

But will the mark go for it?

Thing is, I'm only cheating when I'm dealing.

I'm not going to cheat on anyone else's deal, that's important.

The Hustlers lead the mark downstairs to a private room for the game.

This guy is already an experienced poker player,

and with Paul's card manipulation guaranteeing him good hands,

he's in for a great game.

What could possibly go wrong?

-No way!

-Dude.

When hustlers go out, they don't bring money, they bring prop bets.

The proposition bet only has one rule and that's

that the hustler always wins.

I've got a bet for you guys, OK?

I'm going to use a few things, this shot glass, this peanut,

which I'm going to put in the shot glass, and a ten pence piece.

This is the bet.

You have to get the peanut on top of the ten pence piece

but you're not allowed to touch the ten pence piece or the peanut.

You can touch the shot glass. Move that around,

do whatever you want with it,

but you can't turn it over and both the 10p and the peanut

has to stay in the shot glass. Rachel, you go first.

LAUGHTER

-That was good.

-That was very good! You did have me worried a little bit.

Don't want to sound cheap like I don't want to buy you drinks, but, you know!

I'm going to try that again!

OK, you have a go. There we go.

That is a good idea, but I did say you can't turn it over. OK?

-I don't know.

-No? All right, so you give up, shall I show you?

For a round of drinks, to me, if I can get the peanut on top

of the ten pence piece without touching the ten pence or the peanut.

I am going to use my straw.

Ready? OK, here we go.

It does work!

Easy when you know how. Alex blows down into the shot glass.

This flips the coin over and makes the peanut jump on top. Job done.

I'll have a gin and tonic, please.

A CD of call centre sound effects.

And a cold call to someone who's about to receive

the offer of a lifetime.

-'Hello?

-Hi there.

'My name's Suzi, I'm calling from the Ultimate Gadgets magazine.

-'How are you today?

-Fine, thanks.'

-I'm not trying to sell you anything,

your name's been selected by our system to take part in a new feature we're running giving ordinary people

a chance to try out all of our latest TVs, blu rays, iPads, PCs, any technology you can imagine.

If you're willing to take part, we can deliver a brand new state-of-the-art 3D television

to your home, install it for you, and you can keep it if you want to.

If you don't like the TV, then we'll return it and reinstall your old one.

-OK.

-Is that something you'd be interested in doing?

-Yes.

-Fabulous.

A new TV for free? It's an offer too good to refuse.

We'll probably be able to deliver the TV to you sometime after 11:30, is that OK with you?

-Lovely, thank you.

-You're welcome, be with you soon.

-Bye.

Buckle up!

This is old for new.

Later that morning, a delivery van turns up.

It's got lots of authentic-looking branding so it must be genuine.

The mark is outside,

and gets a good look at the van and the delivery men.

-Hello, mate, all right?

-How did you hear about me? Did my wife fill in something?

We just get sent to where we get sent to.

-Cos I don't want you taking my telly and ripping me off.

-Ha-ha.

Some people are just too suspicious.

-You're going to get a nice brand new one.

-3D.

-State of the art

and if you don't like it, you get your old telly back

and you've had a nice new telly to play with. They're very good TVs.

-Can we have a look at your one?

-Yeah.

-Thank you.

The workmen go inside to look at the mark's existing TV.

It'll be swapped for the new one.

They also place some hidden cameras to capture the action.

-There's a bracket here. All right.

-Let's just grab the other one.

Having scoped out the living room,

Alex and Jazz head outside to the van to bring in their delivery.

Here it is, a state-of-the-art 3D high definition TV.

I wouldn't mind having a watch of one of these.

Before the new one can go up, the existing TV comes down.

Though it doesn't do 3D, it's still an expensive, high-end television.

-Take care of that!

-Oh, yeah.

-This is my baby, I mean it.

The mark's TV goes in the back of the van.

Jane, get the duster out!

-Ready?

-Yep.

Jazz goes back inside to ask the mark how he'd like the new one to be installed.

-Do you get glasses, do you have to have glasses?

-Yeah, glasses are in there.

-Right.

-Would you like it put up on the same bracket?

-If you can.

That's cool, so best thing is if we take it off your telly...

And put it back on that one.

Is it possible just to move this stuff out of the way so we don't kick anything?

That should keep the mark busy for a minute.

-I'll move my very sharp sword, that I can use.

-Ha-ha.

Jazz isn't hanging about. He heads straight into the drivers cab,

where Alex and Jess are already waiting with the engine running,

and before the mark has a chance to react, Alex hits the accelerator, and they're off.

Taking with them the mark's pride and joy.

BEEP

But his guy doesn't take it lying down, he's straight into his car to give chase.

Fortunately, his samurai sword is still in the house and

the Hustlers have too much of a head start.

When the mark returns empty-handed, he isn't happy.

SHOUTING AND CRASHING

Still, at least he's got a brand new TV boxed up in the house.

Doesn't he?

Oh, look.

Books! It's just full of stupid books.

What a great con.

I fell hook, line and sinker.

Something that's free is not a good offer, there's something there.

If you're ever unsure about a company

that you're dealing with, then look them up.

Look on the internet, make some phone calls.

If they don't check out, then keep them out of your home.

Earlier today, Colin Murray posed as a magazine journalist

and asked this poker player to help him write an article

about cheating at cards.

I'm only cheating when I'm dealing.

I'm not going to cheat on anyone else's dealing.

They've agreed that whenever Paul's dealing

he will make sure the mark gets a winning hand.

So long as they get their money back.

What do you mean they get their money back?

They get to star in the new magazine.

He can keep any money he wins,

and Colin will reimburse any other players that lose during Paul's deal.

In The Cross, part two.

Alex has arranged a private room in the basement for the game.

He has even got a barmaid on standby to serve the drinks.

-Suzy, you'll be serving some drinks.

-It's actually Jess.

The mark meets the other players, whose money,

with a little help from Paul, he plans to win.

First, the players buy into the game. The mark gets out £1,000 in cash.

How much you got there?

The cards are in the air, and the game begins.

Each player in turn acts as dealer, shuffling the cards,

handing the deck to his neighbour to cut,

then dealing out the hands.

Oh, yeah!

Do that all night. Keep showing.

The mark is playing the game as he normally would, but he's really waiting for Paul's turn to deal.

Jack five, but every time I get it, I always go...

It's never over until...

Finally, it's time.

Paul carefully manipulates the cards during a shuffle, arranging them

so the mark will get a very strong hand.

But it will only work if Colin does his job properly.

He has to cut the deck at exactly the same point Paul cut it.

That way they'll be back in the order Paul intended them to be in.

That is perfect.

Colin had just minutes to practice this move before the scam began.

Good. That is it.

This is Colin's big moment.

Just one card out either way,

and Paul will deal the wrong hand to the mark.

Oh dear.

The mark is unaware of the move,

but knows things are going to plan

when he sees the hand Paul has dealt him.

A pair of Kings.

His job now is to get as many chips into the pot as possible,

and draw in his opponents with weaker cards.

Let's give the blind some value.

But everyone else folds.

The mark only wins three pounds.

Not exactly what he had had in mind.

The game continues,

and it's another 20 minutes before it's Paul's turn to deal again.

Once more, Paul shuffles,

and Colin makes the rigged cut.

This time Paul deals the mark Ace-King. Another huge poker hand.

I'll make it 20 then. 15 is no good.

All right.

-But once again, everyone folds.

-Is that it?

This cheating thing is not as easy as it seems,

and the mark is getting very frustrated.

Shall we have a little three-minute break?

-Is everyone all right with that?

-That's fine. Let's have a break.

The game breaks are a few minutes, and the cheaters confer.

-It's all well and good cheating...

-Paul suggests a new tactic.

That's a grand of my money,

You put in whatever you've got, buy in more chips,

so he's covered, then I'm going to hit him with a hand as well, it's called a double duke.

He will not only give the mark a big hand,

he'll make sure someone else at the table also has a big hand.

The mark should then bet as much money on that one hand as he possibly can.

So before we play, buy in for more chips.

Okay.

Paul gives him an additional thousand,

and the mark borrows £500 from his mate,

to make sure he wins as much as possible.

Anyone wanting to top up, or anything like that?

-How much?

-£1,500.

Another 15?

-The mark buys in for the extra money.

-Is this someone's coat?

-Oh, that's mine, I left it upstairs.

-All right.

Did you get much out of it?

Excuse me, love, did I bring you down your drink?

-You did, yes.

-Sorry, sorry to interrupt.

The game restarts, and it is the mark's deal.

As luck would have it, he's dealt himself two aces.

The best starting hand in poker.

-And that was without Paul's help.

-I'll raise.

This time he's getting some action from the other players.

Do that all night. Keep showing.

The first shared cards come down in the middle of the table,

there are the other two aces.

The mark is now sitting with an almost unbeatable hand

of four of a kind, and around £2,500 to play with.

I'll just raise it.

-50 is the bet.

-Wow.

Really?

Though this is not one of Paul's rigged hands,

he's firing out the bets.

100.

-Re-raise, 100's the bet.

-He can't believe his luck.

Other players are also putting their chips in the middle.

Opportunities like this don't come along very often.

-200.

-Okay that was 50, the call was 50, the full bet is 200.

That's another call, 300 today, gentleman.

What the hell is going on?

The final card goes down.

The mark has one of the strongest possible hands in poker,

and only one other hand can beat him,

but it's so unlikely, he has no choice

but to get all his chips in.

Paul and Colin look a little worried.

This isn't the plan they agreed.

The mark was only meant to bet big on Paul's deal,

And he's betting, not just with his money, but theirs too.

What's going on? I've never seen anything like this. Holy moly.

There is now more than £8,000 on the table, the cards are turned over.

-You had the king, I had the flush.

-I got the jacks. What have you got?

-The mark turns over his aces.

-Wow! Game over.

-What have you got?

And then he sees the one hand he was dreading.

Another player turns over...

-..a straight flush.

-No way!

He's got a straight flush.

It's a disaster, not only has he lost his money,

he's also managed to lose the money Paul gave him as well.

That's an expensive hand.

Didn't see that one coming, boys.

-Jesus.

-I'm going, thanks very much.

-Cheers.

-Take it easy, mate.

-The game breaks.

-Well done.

Dude...

Well done, well done.

The mark leaves with empty pockets.

And he owes Paul another thousand pounds.

-Paul is left in silence.

-It's unbelievable.

Colin tries to work out what just happened.

He assumed he was going to take the mark's money, not some random stranger.

I've never ever seen that.

What the hell just happened?

That cannot happen, I'm sorry, it can't happen.

I thought the guy was waiting on your cue?

Here's the thing, in a normal game in someone's house,

the odds of that are six million to one, or something like that.

The odds of that happening with you two shysters at the table, are more like evens.

-What are you trying to say, Colin?

-And it was brilliant!

-There he is.

-Ha-ha-ha!

Sure enough, here's the winning player.

Not some random stranger, but working for the hustlers all along.

Just beautiful, it was beautiful.

And I am never playing poker again with people I don't know.

So how did the mark lose all his money on his own deal?

That's not bad!

During the game, Jess arranged a duplicate deck of cards into a prearranged order.

She then slipped it into Alex's coat pocket.

She hung the jacket over the back of Alex's chair,

whilst the game was in mid-flow,

And when the mark had the maximum amount of chips in front of him,

she waited until he shuffled the cards,

and then asked him about his drinks order.

Excuse me, love, did I bring you down your drink?

The tiny moment of distraction was all Alex needed to switch

the shuffled deck for the rigged one.

Sorry, sorry, didn't mean to interrupt.

The mark then passed out the cards,

not knowing he was dealing himself a hand

that no poker player would be able to pass.

From this point on he was guaranteed to lose every penny in his pocket.

-He's got a straight flush.

-No way!

The hand, there was so many pairs, everyone had a full house,

I had quad aces and he got a straight flush, so I lost about...

-..two and a half grand.

-Yeah.

Adding it all up, that's just the way it goes sometimes.

Luck comes in many guises, as they say.

And it weren't my lucky night.

It was wrong...

..but I can't help but admire the workmanship,

and the craftsmanship,

and the genius of what they pulled off at that table.

I would never do it, morally wrong, in all honesty,

I feel it is a moral game.

He'd have actually rang Rob tomorrow and given him

another thousand pounds on top of the scam.

Unbelievable.

It's an eye-opener.

20 quid is my max from here on in.

Sitting at a poker table with a couple of hustlers

is a very bad place to find yourself.

If they're touching the cards it means someone

is going to be losing all of their money,

and it's almost certainly going to be you.

Poker is an increasingly popular game.

Thousands of people enjoy playing it.

But if you want to protect yourself, make sure that you play

with people you know, or you play in a properly-regulated club.

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