Living with Big Game Hunters Brainwashing Stacey

My name is Stacey, I think you're expecting me.

At the minute, everything they're passionate about...

I dislike.

You're either a hunter or a gatherer, and I think it's a gift.

We don't blame a wolf for eating its prey,

but we blame a human for killing its prey.

I believe that you're ignorant of the facts.

Nothing lives for ever.

Killing the animal is like the orgasm.

I feel like I'm an outsider.

If you hadn't have shot him in the first place,

-you wouldn't be in this position.

-Right.

What would it take to change your mind about something

you really believe in?

It's like cabin fever, you know,

I can't leave.

When she picked up the rifle, she started getting into it.

This programme contains some strong language and some scenes which some viewers may find upsetting.

Sport hunting is a multi-billion dollar industry.

It's under the spotlight like never before.

I mean, the one case that we're all familiar with back home is Cecil the

lion. And I remember reading this, and actually, Twitter went nuts

and everyone was just so outraged.

I was appalled. I couldn't quite get my head around why some

rich dentist was willing to spend 50,000 to pay to go to Africa

and shoot a beautiful lion.

Right now, I'm on my way

to the Western Hunting and Conservation Expo.

Essentially, it's just this huge hub

where loads of like-minded hunters gather.

At this point, I fundamentally disagree with hunting rare animals

just for the sake of it. I do not get it.

But, over the next couple of weeks, I am going to spend a huge amount of

time to try and explore their world

and at least understand certain points

about where they're coming from.

-How are you? I'm Stacey.

-Nice to meet you.

It's really lovely to meet you, too.

-How do you do?

-Good, how are you?

-How's things, Marc?

I'm well, thank you.

I'm here to meet Marc Warnke,

a lifelong hunter who's offered to introduce me to the world he loves.

It's all so foreign to me, like, I've never been hunting,

I've never even been fishing.

Are you scared? Are you excited?

I'm kind of anxious of what I'm going to have to see.

Sure. Well, Jaken and I are honoured to share it with you.

Oh, that's very sweet.

Well, we're honoured because I believe we're so disenfranchised

from the way we eat our food in today's world.

We are the last bastions of human protein consumption.

We're using nature, you know, in a way that is responsible

and all those other elements

that allow us to be stewards of Mother Nature.

Jaken's been hunting with his dad since he was seven years old.

So that's actually the bear, as he comes in.

So this, by the way, is after six months of work

to make this moment possible.

Oh, it's so beautiful, the bear.

(Yes!)

(Yes!)

(God, thank you for guiding Jaken's arrow.

(Please help that bear to die quickly, feed our families, amen.)

(Amen.)

And did you eat the bear?

Yeah, we did, actually.

It was really surprisingly good.

-Oh, really?

-Really tasty.

-It was amazing.

-Yeah?

Yeah, all there was was noises of clinking plates

and ribs hitting the ground.

It was delicious - delicious - some of the best.

Could you not just enjoy the outdoors without killing anything

-at the end?

-We do, all the time.

-You do?

All the time. But it's different when you hunt, right?

Because I think it's innate. I think God gives you

the gatherer side of the population or the hunter side.

You're either a hunter or a gatherer, and I think it's a gift.

I'm told the money hunters pay to kill animals like lions

actually helps conserve wildlife and communities.

The conservation element is quite confusing, isn't it?

-It is.

-It's quite complicated.

If that lion has huge, substantial monetary value,

and so does that elephant, then you call the government,

they call in a hunter that comes in

and pays 50,000 to harvest that lion,

and then that meat and that money goes to that community

and the conservation or relocation of the remaining pride.

You forget, we're animal lovers.

So to have more animals to be able to hunt, we need healthy populations

to support that, right?

The US alone has nearly 14 million hunters.

Many buy their hunts at auctions like this,

one of the expo's main events.

Somebody help me out on this. Somebody give me 50,000 to go.

HE CHANTS

I've got 30. I need five. Somebody give me 35.

The bidding to shoot an Antelope Island mule deer

has gone into six figures.

I've got 400,000.

Going once, going to twice...

400,000...sold!

I want to know if conservation's really behind the huge sums

being bid tonight.

How important is conservation?

Because this is the buzzword that I've heard all night.

Hunters don't get the accolades that they deserve.

There's a lot of money raised and it all goes to a great cause,

and great organisation.

You know, I love wildlife. I'd do anything to give back.

CHEERING That guy has just spent nearly half a million dollars,

you know, most people will never own a home worth that amount.

It's just unbelievable.

And I definitely underestimated how much money is thrown

at this industry.

Is it because they believe that it's necessary?

Is it for the love of the animals, the conservation?

Or is it about status,

showing how much money you've got to everyone else involved?

And all in at nine...

I sold it right here.

Marc and Jaken's next hunting trip is to South Africa.

They've invited me along to experience their world

from the inside.

Can spending time with them change my mind about hunting

and could they ever convince me to pick up a gun?

We're, like, all off on a family trip together.

I do feel like I'm going to be living the story

and kind of walking in their shoes.

So I'll either be a raging vegan...

..or a gun wielding lunatic. Let's see.

I've never been hunting before, so I'm not entirely sure what to pack.

-Hang about, what?

-Sam, get off that.

THEY LAUGH

So you're going on safari with all these big game hunting killing

machines and you want to turn in white hot pants

and a leopard-print bra.

-"I'm here!"

-Surprise!

"Pass me the gun."

It's just not my scene

and not a world that I've ever experienced before.

No, you'll have to be strong.

I think you'll see things that you won't be used to.

She's not going to be fazed by anything,

but, at the same time, I think she's quite nervous herself, to be honest.

I'm quite nervous for her, like, it's tough.

You're walking into the den of,

like, "Well, what do you mean, you don't understand?"

-I know.

-Where's the picture of me, anyway?

-There's no picture of you in there, Sam.

-No.

Can you get out of the bag now, ST?

I'm arriving in Limpopo province.

It's almost half the size of the UK

and a popular destination for hunters.

Thank you.

Oh, hello.

My name is Stacey,

I think you're expecting me.

Can you open the gate, please?

Thank you. Bye.

No-one here can understand my accent.

My home for the next two weeks is Zulani Safaris,

a 4,000-acre enclosed game ranch.

Did you see that? Wildebeest.

I wonder how long they'll be alive for.

There are 37 different species of animal here,

almost all of which can, for a price, be hunted.

I don't feel like I'm at one with nature, I feel like...

..I'm in a safari park.

Waiting for me at the lodge are Marc and Jaken...

Hello, love, how are you?

..and also retired ammunitions manufacturer Alan

and his wife, Janet, from Indiana.

-What is it that you love about hunting so much?

-I just...

Every time I come, I say I'm not going to get anything,

"I'm not here, I'm just to see..."

Cos I used to love watching the animals.

And then they always talk me into getting one.

Ah, so what's swayed you?

-Gordon.

-He persuades me every time I'm here.

-SHE LAUGHS

-So I've got four animals now.

Gordon Brace is the ranch owner.

He's been hunting for over 50 years.

For the next fortnight,

Gordon will be trying to persuade me that what they do as hunters

-is right.

-Hello, hello, everybody.

-Hi.

-You must be Stacey.

You're Gordon, right?

-How's things? Nice to meet you.

-Likewise, welcome.

Thank you for having me.

Before I've even got my coat off, the hard sell begins.

When I started promoting game farms way back in the late-'70s,

there were about ten registered game farms in South Africa -

there's now close on 10,000.

There were about half a million head of wild game,

there's now an estimated 18 to 22 million head of game,

for one reason only - hunting.

I'm, at this point, quite opposed to the idea of trophy hunting.

So why?

It's just the idea of going out and killing

a lion, you know, these animals are just so vulnerable.

Immediately you go to the lion because Cecil, right? OK?

Most people now have the opinions are divorced from nature,

so divorced from it, that their perception of wildlife

is the Lion King,

Bambi, they're humanising these animals.

It's easy to write on Facebook,

it's easy to say, "I am an animal lover."

But I'm not an animal lover.

I wouldn't particularly describe myself as an animal lover.

It's just the idea of hunting for trophies.

To hunt is not a choice -

it's a need. And not a need in an addictive or negative way,

God put that in us so we could survive.

Without that, none of us would be here.

I can't understand how killing a lion or killing an elephant,

or killing a rhino, would make somebody feel good.

I'm not saying, you know, they're an awful person, they're monsters

and they're going to hell, I just can't understand it.

-So perhaps spending more time...

-I get that.

-..around people,

like you guys, I will, you know, have concluding thoughts.

I can't understand rap, but I wouldn't ban it.

They say in the near future you will be able to choose what type of child

you want. Let's just say that happens,

they're going to look at people who have sex as unnatural.

Well, the instinct to have sex is still going to be there.

Hunting is exactly the same.

Killing the animal is like the orgasm,

but that's not what sex is.

It's dressing up, it's getting ready, it's getting prepared,

it's putting on your make-up if you're going out dancing.

It's after you've made love, you've had the orgasm,

it's lying and holding each other.

It's enjoying the moment you've had your orgasm, right?

So that's what we do in the wild places.

I just hope this experience isn't going to be as inclusive as that.

You have to give me the heads up if you see any poisonous snakes.

The trophy hunting argument can be won every time by logic.

And I believe that Stacey's an emotional being,

and people who are emotional entities got their gift, too,

but I do believe it's clouding her judgment.

Cool, well, I'll see you guys tomorrow.

-We'll see you in the morning.

-Bye.

Now, Stacey has said she's come with an open mind

and it's easy to say that, it's not easy to do it.

I think her biggest hurdle is going to be actually to put herself

in our shoes and see where we come from and our environment,

as opposed to her environment.

One day in and already I feel under siege.

At the minute, everything they're passionate about I dislike.

I feel like they are this established gang...

..and I'm an outsider.

It's like cabin fever, you know, I can't leave.

-Good morning.

-Morning, Marc.

You all right, Jaken?

This morning I'm nervous.

Marc and Gordon want to teach me one of the key skills of hunting -

rifle shooting.

You take a deep breath, you let your breath out.

Nice and comfortable. I'm on.

Take my shot. And I stay down.

And I'm going to put the target up for you.

This is my chance to shoot a trophy hunter!

HE LAUGHS

Squeeze the trigger. Pull it down.

Oh, my God! Shit.

Wow.

-Did that hurt you?

-Little bit.

-Yeah?

-But not unbearably.

-All right.

A key part of Gordon's hunting philosophy is achieving a quick,

-clean kill.

-Most hunters will aim for the shoulder.

The bullet goes into the shoulder

and hopefully hits the heart,

so it's quite a big target.

That's why very few hunters will mess up.

-OK.

-You ready to go again?

Yeah.

Much better.

Well done.

-I've done well.

-Your first shot was there,

-your second shot was there.

-Oh, so my first was better, really.

-Yeah.

-But it's a good group, so then you can adjust it.

-At least I've hit the box.

-Yes.

Cos I thought I was going to hit the bush.

If this was an animal, and his lungs are so big, you've got him.

Honestly, it's surprised me that I'm doing reasonably well.

You know, that's exactly what Gordon was after.

So obviously, now, I think I'm some kind of American sniper.

I might be enjoying the shooting range,

but the idea of killing for fun is still leaving me cold.

When I was in Utah, you should have seen the amounts of money

these hunters were parting with, I'm talking hundreds of thousands

in some circumstances, it was quite sickening.

Why would you use a word like sickening for that?

-It made me feel sick because...

-But those are generous people.

Those are people who could've bought that same hunt on the average

market for 10,000 bucks

and were choosing to spend 350,000 towards conservation.

How would that be sickening?

But I can't ignore the fact that I do believe there are some men,

-it is just about the kill and about bringing home that massive head.

-Oh, yeah, 100%, absolutely.

That's what sickens me.

The trophy hunting, there are some parts that may not be right,

but we don't blame a wolf for eating its prey,

but we blame a human for killing its prey and eating it.

You're coming from a place where I believe

you're ignorant of the facts. Your ignorant of what really happens.

-Mm-hmm.

-And it's my job to broaden your horizon a bit.

But if it injects the amount of income we need to sustain the areas

for these animals, it's the habitat that we need to save.

You know, the soil is getting...

-This land was terribly damaged.

-Yeah.

Now everything's coming back.

You can see all the trees coming back, the tortoises, the birds,

everything's coming back.

For me, it's that.

-Because of the money generated from trophy hunting?

-Yeah.

Oh, fuck.

So, my first full day, out here in the bush, and every time you say,

"Oh, aren't the animals beautiful?" They say, "Well, you know,

"none of this would exist if it wasn't for trophy hunting."

It's like their opportunity to remind you that they can justify it.

And I think, "Well, how much of that is a convenient excuse?"

Why do they have to kill something just so that they've got this head

to take home and put on their wall, and show off to their pals about?

Stacey embraced the shooting today, she looked like she had fun.

If you have a look at the rifling, and how anti she was guns,

totally anti-guns and anti-guns and...

-that's conditioning.

-Mmm.

That's to belong to that club,

that liberal club, so they all bleat the same cliches,

and yet, when she picked up the rifle, she started getting into it.

And when she started shooting, and shooting pretty well,

it's like, "Wow, I want to do this again. Oh, that's good. Oh!"

And she got so proud of what she was doing.

It's like, all of a sudden, there's a different attitude coming here.

Today I'm witnessing my first hunt on the Zulani plains.

This time the targets are living and breathing.

How many animals do you think you've hunted over the years, Alan?

I... No idea.

Rough estimate?

If I had a gun to your head?

There are two on the van!

I don't know, 50, 75, total...

..not counting squirrels and rabbits.

Alan's paid nearly 1,000 to shoot a wildebeest.

The first thing to keep in mind - silence.

He will hear you whispering from 200 yards away.

We track the animal for two hours.

I feel like on a school trip that my mum made me come on.

Then Gordon spots his target.

(Bring the sticks.)

Take him.

GUNSHOTS

This is not the clean kill that Gordon has talked about.

Fuck!

(Do you think you got it?)

I wanted a good, clean kill and normally this is the man to do it.

So now we have to track.

I can tell you're quite stressed.

Always, on a wounded animal, I'm very single-minded.

We want to put this animal out of its suffering as quickly as we can.

-Mmm.

-It's...

I can't pretend this doesn't happen, it does.

There's now a sense of urgency in air.

Gordon's gutted, you can tell.

He's in a state of panic.

But the reality is we wouldn't be in this position if he wasn't

facilitating...hunting.

Why do you think you missed?

-Shit happens.

-Yeah.

Do you feel bad or...?

I'm not happy.

But tracking is part of the experience as much as hunting.

Using scent dogs and looking for blood spots,

we try to track the animal.

Good girl, Bonnie.

Gordon and his trackers have spotted something.

We've got blood here, but it's drying up quickly.

-Where is it?

-There.

Oh, yes. God, how did you spot that?

Finally, four hours after Alan's first shot...

GUNSHOTS

..Gordon puts the wounded animal out of its misery.

-Oh...

-It was a good shot.

I hit it where it was supposed to.

And then I gave it a headshot to put...

to kill it quickly and cleanly.

Its suffering is over.

We've taken Alan's mistake and turned it into something positive.

But I'm struggling to see what's positive

about the wildebeest's slow death.

Was it really necessary?

It is...

the thrill to kill that so many of these people love,

you know, it's a bloody, senseless sport.

They have caused suffering to an animal

and that's the one thing they say that they hate the most, as hunters.

This morning I want to see what happens to the animals

which are killed.

During hunting season, around ten animals a week are killed at Zulani.

Foreman Johannes butchers them on-site.

And the animal that you skin the most?

Mmm, he's quite big.

-Yeah, this is quite big.

-Yeah.

Seeing the dead animal up close is pretty gruesome.

Oh, crumbs.

Gordon is quick to sell me more benefits of his sport.

We've got some water back that Alan and Janet harvested.

This meat will go to the poor kids,

so it was just a win-win situation all around.

Alan is also donating the wildebeest from yesterday.

-That's a lot of meat!

-Yep.

I can't help wondering if this is being put on for my benefit.

In the last three or four years, almost every hunter that comes,

international hunters, partakes in the meat for the poor programme.

Yeah? And do you think that's because they have a conscience

or do you think that's because

they're trying to justify their behaviour?

No, they definitely do it, without exception,

because they're kind people. They're good-hearted people.

The village creche has over 140 children, all under five,

many of whom are orphaned.

This lady is amazing.

She tries to do the best she can do with the little that she's got.

-Hello, how are you?

-Hello.

-Hi, nice to see you.

I'm fine and how are you?

Thank you for having us.

-You're welcome.

-You're the boss.

-Yeah, I'm the boss.

-Ah! OK.

This is from everybody, OK?

Thank you very much. You are doing a lot.

We just wish we could do more.

Gordon is a good person

because, to come here and give us something for the children to eat,

they find that the children are suffering a lot.

And if the tourists and Gordon didn't bring the meat,

-the kids would go hungry.

-That's it.

That's it. Very, very, very important.

It makes you feel so good, doesn't it? Yeah. That's what it's about.

It doesn't excuse the hours of suffering I witnessed on the hunt,

but, I must admit,

something positive has come from the end result.

Do you know what? Initially, I was quite sceptical

about them showing me this worthy scene,

but even if there are ulterior motives,

the facts are that their meat will feed over 140 kids for a week...

..and that's far more than I've done.

Who can argue with meat that feeds kids?

You can't.

CHEERING

You can see that she's taking to it.

You know, she's getting it, she's understanding,

you know, what it is about the difference between watching

something in your lounge on the television

and actually being out here.

She can come and see it for herself.

She can get a little taste of the good that hunting does.

The only time I've ever seen a bow, and this sounds ridiculous,

-is you know Robin Hood?

-Yeah.

Super old school.

Marc and Jaken are bowhunters.

I'm helping Jaken with his archery practice.

Oh, my gosh.

I want to know how a 12-year-old kid becomes such an avid hunter.

That's just an OK shot at 20.

I should be doing a little bit better.

My dad makes me look like a fool.

He can shoot just as well as me at 60, so...

Well, he's had more practice than you.

-Oh, yeah, definitely.

-You don't need to beat yourself up about that.

Your dad, to me, seems very passionate and very disciplined...

-Yeah.

-..and very dedicated in terms of hunting.

Is it ever too much? Is it a bit like, "All right, Dad, like...

-"Steady on"?

-There is every now and then, when it's a little like,

"OK, Dad, that's enough now."

I think, if I stopped hunting, he would be accepting

but also he would be disappointed.

It's really cool for him that he's having his children hunting -

that was his dream.

Marc's preparing Jaken to try and shoot his first ever wildebeest.

The animal deserves for you to be confident because, remember,

I think animals know more clearly than we do that they have a destiny

to eventually be eaten by someone.

And you are that someone that can harvest them with respect

and reverence and speed.

And I want you to tap into that part in your heart that knows

he deserves your best.

-You hear me?

-Mm-hmm.

-OK.

Marc's also increasing the pressure on me

to play an active role in today's hunt.

If you're going to be that person the rest of your life that hires

your killer with your cheque book,

then you owe it to yourself to try that other side of things and know

what at least you're asking somebody to do for you.

I'm conflicted. I feel like you're right.

I want to have the balls to, you know,

take part in something that

I do eat a lot of the time,

but I don't want to do something I'm going to regret.

I don't want to look down the barrel, shoot something in the head,

and then immediately think, "Fuck, why have I done that?

"I didn't want to do it."

I treat her in a lot of ways as I would with my son -

that she may or may not hunt.

I don't honestly think Stacey will know until she tries,

so I will encourage her to do that.

But we'll see.

Is this the day that I shoot a guinea fowl?

Who knows? I don't know.

I'm not going to be pressured or forced into doing something

that I'm not entirely sure about.

Marc puts Jaken in position first

and I'm relieved that I don't have to target any animals just yet.

(If the brush was clear, could you shoot out of it?)

-(Yeah, I think so.)

-(You think so?)

-(Yeah.)

-(I need to know whether you can.)

(Yeah, I can.)

With us in a hide, the animal's coming close.

Gordon masks our scent by burning dry dung.

(What is that, Gordon?)

After a long wait, a wildebeest comes into view.

(This is range.)

(Really tight on the shoulder.)

(It's OK. It's OK.)

(Come here. It's OK.)

(It's OK.)

Jaken has missed the animal's vital organs,

making the quick kill he'd been hoping for very unlikely.

(I just felt like I wasn't really prepared,

(I felt like I didn't really focus that well,

(so I could have focused better and done a better trigger squeeze.)

(Yeah.)

(Try not to get yourself so worked up.)

(Yeah.)

-(So, are you going to have to finish him off?)

-(Yes.)

Two hunts, two wounded wildebeest, and no clean kills.

Once more, it's down to Gordon and his trackers.

I just instinctively felt really sorry for Jaken,

my heart went out to him, because he is 12 years old,

and his dad has installed this passion

and this love for hunting into him from a very, very young age.

So I think he must feel the pressure.

(I want you to know that it's part of being a hunter...)

(..and I'm sorry you're having to deal with it.)

The wildebeest is not found.

After several hours, the search is abandoned.

I'm so pleased I didn't bow to the pressure to shoot something.

It's something that we don't ever want to happen...

Well, if you hadn't have shot him in the first place,

-you wouldn't be in this position.

-Right.

Yep, I get it.

(I feel for Jaken. I think he puts you on this pedestal, you know?)

(My question to him tonight,

(when we have quiet and everybody else goes away, is,

("Bud, are you OK enough to do this with me again?")

-(Yeah.)

-And if he said no, I'd say, "OK, I gotcha. I get it."

Marc and I had a difficult day today.

It was a bit more strained than it is normally.

It kind of made me realise how huge a deal it was for Jaken.

He's very a sensitive kid

but he belongs to this controversial...

..gang.

I'm halfway through my time on the ranch.

Today, Gordon wants to introduce me to a friend,

which means a welcome break from hunting.

Look at this!

It's like a prison.

Because of its precious residents,

the whereabouts of this ranch are a closely guarded secret.

Hello. How are you?

I'm Stacey. How's things?

-Hi, Stacey.

-Lovely to meet you.

Lovely to meet you, too.

-So, Gordon, I'll see you later.

-Catch you later.

-Thank you.

Sylvia breeds rhinos, which are under constant threat from poachers.

There's a baby.

Oh, my God, look at this little rhino.

Oh, Sylvia, this is such a treat.

Sylvia spends thousands of dollars each week

protecting their endangered rhinos from armed intruders.

It sounds like sometimes you live in fear.

-You do.

-Is it worth it? I mean, why do you do it?

You just love these animals.

They're your children

and, if it's yours, you defend it.

And, actually, you're part of conservation.

She doesn't permit hunting on her sanctuary,

but, as a conservationist,

her take on the industry isn't what I was expecting.

Hunting in conservation is very, very important.

So you have no issue with hunting?

I don't like hunting but I don't see...

There's nothing wrong with hunting because the animals,

their numbers get too many, so you have to take out some of them.

And you're actually taking that money that you're getting

for the hunting to put back in your conservation.

It's one thing getting the conservation argument from hunters,

but from someone devoted to protecting rhinos

is a different matter.

Every experience I encounter here...I'm torn.

I understand that the revenue is necessary,

what I don't understand is the desire

to want to come all this way just to kill a huge animal.

Back at the lodge, our dinner includes wildebeest

harvested from Zulani.

This is a traditional South African...

-Potjie.

-Potjie pot, it's called.

Everybody has their own secret recipe of how to make it.

-This is mine.

-It's a top secret.

Gordon says around 20% of his 3,000 animals

are shot by hunters each year,

but the money they pay supports the wellbeing of the rest.

You know, you said yourself that you thought it was about lions and

leopards and elephants, and so on.

That's actually a very small part of the trophy hunting.

The vast majority come here for plains game.

And, yes, they are trophy animals,

and it's a double whammy because we get that income that we need

to survive, to be able to have a place like this.

When you give it value, then people are going to take care of it.

And with all the hoo-ha now about lions...

yes, if there are areas where lions are endangered,

I think every single hunter I know would be first in line to say,

"Let's do something to stop this.

"Let's take care of these animals."

Because it's not in our interests

to wipe out the animals that we live on.

I mean, you make valid points,

but isn't the reality that it's more about the thrill of the kill,

the excitement, the adrenaline?

Most people are urbanised.

They live in the concrete jungle.

They are so divorced from nature.

They haven't a clue about the reality of nature

and what it is to be in the natural places.

We do, as I say, more for wildlife than they will ever do.

And do we enjoy doing it? Do we get a thrill out of it? Yes.

But it's not just the kill.

Gordon has actually made this as pleasant as possible.

I'll get home and everyone will say, "Oh, were they all lunatics?

"Were they all nutters?"

And, actually, no...

I don't think they are.

I want to check up on how Jaken's feeling after his traumatic hunt.

Do you feel like you'd like to have another shot

at perhaps shooting another animal?

Yeah, oh, yeah. I probably will still, but...

-Yeah.

-You won't let this affect you?

No. It happens, so...

Yeah.

Yeah.

I'm joining Gordon and some of his regulars

on a hunt for one of Africa's most iconic species.

We rock and roll.

(We have a zebra in front of us.

(He's going to try and see if he can get it.)

Gordon wants me to see first-hand

how hunting can help conserve wildlife.

(Reload. Reload.)

(There was a lot of dust.

(Normally that means it's down and it's in its death throes now...)

-(Really?)

-(..and it's more than likely dead now.)

(It's down.)

(Oh, gosh, yeah, it is.)

Good, clean, more than likely a hotshot.

He hasn't suffered at all.

It's hard to witness,

but Gordon says he earns over £6,500 dollars a year

from zebra hunts alone,

with most of that money ploughed back into the reserve and animals.

You know, I've got a herd of about 60-plus zebra here

and we'll harvest maybe six a year.

-Sure.

-And those six a year ensure their survival,

but again it comes down to it's not just for the zebra,

it's for the birds, the dung beetles, the plants,

the trees. Everything that lives in this habitat, this ecosystem now,

has a place to be where it's supposed to be and thrive

because he has taken out one animal,

and he will pay for that.

-Yes.

-OK.

Now that is what we call a textbook shot.

It's beautiful. Well done.

-How are you feeling?

-I'm proud of my husband.

I'm happy when it's a good shoot.

It's a clean hunt, you know.

The animal doesn't suffer, it's the circle of life.

Nothing lives for ever.

No, please, I want to take picture with you.

Please, I'd be very grateful. It'd be so nice.

Erm...

I'll take the picture for you.

I'll take it. THEY LAUGH

Thank you very much.

You're welcome.

After nearly two weeks on the hunting lodge,

my reactions to what I'm seeing are starting to change.

I have been around the same group of people,

bombarding me with their rhetoric, which is quite compelling.

There are certain elements

that are hard to disagree with.

I just never really anticipated that I would actually see

the killing of a zebra,

and it's bizarre cos you kind of take stock and you think,

"Hang on a second, this is all becoming very normal."

You know, I feel that I'm sort of becoming almost desensitised.

Today, Gordon's decided it's time for me to shoot my first animal.

I feel like I want to have the balls to, sort of,

stick to my word and stay true to what I believe,

in the sense, you know, I do eat meat.

But then I just know, if the opportunity presents itself...

I will struggle, there will be conflict.

He's selected one of the smallest huntable creatures here.

Guinea fowl, as I say, it's exceptionally good.

And in terms of size, it's like a chicken or turkey, right?

Yeah, it's a wild chicken. It's just a wild chicken, yeah.

Just drop... There we go.

I mean, you've already shown on the shooting range

that you can shoot well.

You've just now got to put that into practice.

(We're going to go in there and just see how it goes down

(and what she feels - is she a hunter or is she a gatherer?)

Gordon spots a flock and it's action stations.

(Come quickly, quickly, quickly.

(They're going next to a...)

My heart is pounding.

Am I going to be able to pull that trigger?

(Fuck!) HE LAUGHS

-(He flew off.)

-Yeah, he flew off, yeah.

(Come lie on your tummy.)

I'm trying to remember everything Gordon's taught me

about staying dead quiet.

-CHATTER FROM PHONE

-(Shit!)

(Rule number one, turn off the damn phone!)

I get one more chance.

(Take my shoulder.)

-Ah, shit.

-HE LAUGHS

Do I think I've got that killing instinct?

No, because...

This is the least favourite part for me.

I genuinely feel like I have

-truly experienced what you guys experience...

-I think so.

..just before you're about to pull the trigger -

the heart racing, the dry mouth, the adrenaline,

-the dread.

-Yeah. You come from such a totally different world.

You've come more than halfway, I think.

And as I keep saying, it's not just about the kill.

I mean, these animals belong here.

You know, if hunting is the reason for this, bring it on.

Stacey has been a pleasant surprise for me.

She hasn't stood from a distance and judged us.

She's actually come in and walked in our shoes for a while

and seen what we do,

and that's the most I can ask for. So, you know...

And I've grown to be very fond of Stacey and...

I hope the feeling is mutual.

Oh, guys. THEY LAUGH

After two weeks on the ranch, it's time to bid farewell

to my hunting family.

-Gordon.

-Yes, yes.

-SHE LAUGHS

Thank you for coming.

Thank you. Thanks for your patience and thanks for your honesty.

-Right back at you.

-I really appreciate it.

We're going to miss you, for sure.

Take care. Thank you.

Thank you, too.

I'm leaving with fond memories of the people I've met,

but I also won't forget the unnecessary suffering of animals

I've seen caused by hunting.

Obviously, at the start of this whole experience,

I had a very definite set of opinions.

You know, the idea that people would come all of this way

to try and find the biggest animal

and shoot its face off and then hang the head on their wall

was so foreign to me...

and it still is.

What I do accept is that it's quite a complicated issue

and some of their arguments are compelling.

It's difficult to go against someone when they're saying,

"If trophy hunting didn't exist, none of this would be here."

Killing what you then go on to eat, I can't argue with that.

Donating food to kids that otherwise wouldn't eat,

who on earth can argue with that?

But...

yeah, I'm still not team trophy hunter, I'm afraid.