Vincent and the Doctor Doctor Who


Vincent and the Doctor

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FOOTSTEPS

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So this is one of the last paintings Van Gogh ever painted.

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Those final months of his life were probably the most astonishing artistic outpouring in history.

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It was like Shakespeare knocking off Othello, Macbeth and King Lear over the summer hols.

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And especially astonishing because Van Gogh did it with no hope of praise or reward.

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-Thanks for bringing me.

-You're welcome.

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You're being so nice to me. Why are you being so nice to me?

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-I'm always nice to you.

-Not like this.

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These places you're taking me - Arcadia, the Trojan Gardens, now this.

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-I think it's suspicious.

-There's nothing to be suspicious about.

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OK, I was joking. Why aren't you?

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Each of these pictures now is worth tens of millions of pounds.

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Yet in his lifetime, he was a commercial disaster.

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Sold only one painting, and that to the sister of a friend.

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We have here possibly the greatest artist of all time,

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but when he died, you could have sold his entire body of work

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and got about enough money to buy a sofa and a couple of chairs.

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LAUGHTER

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If you follow me now...

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-Who is it?

-It's the doctor!

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-He was the doctor who took care of Van Gogh when he started to go mad.

-I knew that.

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Look! There it is, the actual one.

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Yes. You can almost feel his hand painting it right in front of you.

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Carving the colours into shapes...

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-Wait a minute.

-What?

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Well, just look at that.

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-What?

-Something very not good indeed.

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-What thing very not good?

-Look there, in the window of the church.

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-Is it a face?

-Yes.

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And not a nice face at all.

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I know evil when I see it and I see it in that window.

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It has changed hands for something in the region of 20...

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Excuse me. If I can just interrupt for one second. Sorry, everyone.

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Routine inspection, Ministry of Art and...

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-Artiness. So, um...

-Dr Black.

-Yes, that's right.

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-Do you know when that picture of the church was painted?

-Ah, what an interesting question.

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-Most people...

-When was it?

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-Exactly?

-As exactly as you can.

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Without a long speech, if poss. I'm in a hurry.

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Well, in that case, probably somewhere between the 1st and 3rd of June.

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-What year?

-1890.

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Less than a year before he killed himself.

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Thank you, sir. Very helpful indeed.

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Nice bow-tie. Bow-ties are cool.

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-Yours is very...

-Oh, thank you.

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Keep telling them stuff. We need to go.

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-What about the other pictures?

-Art can wait. This is life and death.

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We need to talk to Vincent Van Gogh.

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TARDIS WHIRS

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CAT SCREECHES, DOG BARKS

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Right, so here's the plan. We find Vincent and he leads us straight to the church and our nasty friend.

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-Easy-peasy.

-Well, no. I suspect nothing will be easy with Mr Van Gogh.

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Now, he'll probably be in the local cafe -

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sort of orangey light, chairs and tables outside.

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-Like this?

-That's the one.

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Or indeed like that.

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Yeah, exactly like that.

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Good evening.

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Does the name Vincent Van Gogh ring a bell?

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Don't mention that man to me.

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Excuse me.

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-Do you know Vincent Van Gogh?

-Unfortunately.

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Unfortunately?

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He's drunk, he's mad and he never pays his bills.

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Good painter, though, eh?

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Come on! Come on!

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One painting for one drink.

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That's not a bad deal.

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It wouldn't be a bad deal if the painting were any good. I can't hang that up on my walls.

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It'd scare the customers half to death.

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It's bad enough having you in here in person,

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let alone looming over the customers day and night in a stupid hat. You pay money or you get out.

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-I'll pay if you like.

-What?

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Well, if you like. I'll pay for the drink.

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Or I'll pay for the painting and you can use the money to pay for the drink.

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Exactly who are you?

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I'm...new in town.

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Well, in that case, you don't know three things.

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One, I pay for my own drinks, thank you.

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LAUGHTER

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Two, no-one ever buys any of my paintings or they would be laughed out of town,

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so if you want to stay in town, I suggest you keep your cash to yourself.

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And three, your friend's cute, but you should keep your big nose out of other people's business.

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Come on, just one more drink.

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-I'll pay tomorrow.

-No.

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Or, on the other hand, slightly more compassionately, yes.

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-Or, on the other hand, to protect my business from madmen, no.

-Or...?

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Oh, look, just shut up, the pair of you!

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I would like a bottle of wine, please, which I will then share with whomever I choose.

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That could be good.

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-That's good by me.

-Good.

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That accent of yours.

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-Are you from Holland like me?

-Yes.

-No.

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She means yes. So, start again.

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-Hello, I'm the Doctor.

-I knew it!

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-Sorry?

-My brother's always sending doctors, but you won't be able to help.

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No, not that kind of doctor.

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That's incredible, don't you think, Amy?

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-Absolutely. One of my favourites.

-One of my favourite whats?

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-You've never seen my work before.

-Ah, yes.

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One of my favourite paintings that I've ever seen. Generally.

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Then you can't have seen many paintings, then.

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I know it's terrible.

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It's the best I could do.

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Your hair is orange.

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Yes. So's yours.

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Yes.

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It was more orange, but now is, of course, less.

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So, Vincent, painted any churches recently?

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Any churchy plans? Are churches, chapels, religiousy stuff like that,

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something you'd like to get into? You know, fairly soon?

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Well, there is one church I'm thinking of painting when the weather is right.

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That is very good news.

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-WOMAN SCREAMS

-She's been murdered!

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-Help me!

-That, on the other hand, isn't quite such good news.

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Come on, Amy, Vincent!

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WOMAN SCREAMS

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She's been ripped to shreds!

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-Please, let me look. I'm a doctor.

-Who is it?

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Oh, no, no, no.

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Is she dead?

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Away, all of you vultures! This is my daughter. Giselle.

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What monster could have done this?

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-Get away from her!

-OK, OK.

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Get that madman out of here!

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You bring this on us. Your madness! You!

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He's to blame!

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Are you all right?

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Yes, I'm used to it.

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Has anything like this murder happened here before?

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Only a week ago. It's a terrible time.

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As I thought, as I thought. Come on, we'd better get you home.

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-Where are you staying tonight?

-Oh, you're very kind.

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AMY LAUGHS NERVOUSLY

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-Dark night, very starry.

-It's not much.

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I live on my own.

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But you should be OK for one night. ONE night.

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-We're going to stay with him?

-Until he paints that church.

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-Watch out. That one's wet.

-What?

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Sorry about all the clutter.

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-Some clutter.

-I've come to accept the only person who's going to love my paintings is me.

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Wow.

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I mean, really. Wow.

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Yeah, I know it's a mess. I'll have a proper clear-out.

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I must, I really must.

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Coffee, anyone?

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Not for me, actually.

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You know, you should be careful with these. They're...precious.

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Precious to me. Not precious to anyone else.

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They're precious to me!

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Well, you're very kind. And kindness is most welcome.

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Right, so, this church, then. Near here, is it?

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-What is it with you and the church?

-Oh, just casually interested in it, you know.

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Far from casual.

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Seems to me. you never talk about anything else.

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-He's a strange one.

-OK, so let's talk about you.

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What are you interested in?

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Look around.

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Art.

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It seems to me there's so much more to the world than the average eye is allowed to see.

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I believe, if you look hard,

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there are more wonders in this universe

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than you could ever have dreamed of.

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You don't have to tell me.

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It's colour. Colour that holds the key.

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I can hear the colours.

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Listen to them.

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Every time I step outside, I feel nature is shouting at me.

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"Come on. Come and get me. Come on.

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"Come on! Capture my mystery!"

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Maybe you've had enough coffee now.

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How about some nice, calming tea?

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Let's get you a cup of camomile or something, shall we? Amy?

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Where's Amy? AMY SCREAMS

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No, no. NO!

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Amy? Amy?

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What happened?

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I was having a look at the paintings out here when something hit me from behind.

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-It's OK. He's gone now and we're here.

-No!

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Take it easy. Take it easy!

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What's happening? What's he doing?

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I don't know. Oh, dear.

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Run. Run!

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Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's not a bad idea. Amy, get back. He's having some kind of fit.

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I'll try to calm him down.

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Easy, Vincent, easy.

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Look, look. It's me, it's me, it's me. It's the Doctor, look.

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No-one else is here. So, Vincent...

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Look out!

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CREATURE ROARS

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I can't see anything. What is it?

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That is a good question.

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-Let me help you.

-You can see him, too?

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Yes. Ish.

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Well, no. Not really.

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CREATURE ROARS

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You couldn't see him?

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No. Oi!

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DOCTOR ROARS

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CREATURE SCREAMS

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-He's gone.

-Oh, right.

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Yes, of course.

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Right.

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-So he's invisible? What did he look like?

-I'll show you.

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Oh, no, no, no!

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-What?

-It's just... That was quite a good...

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Oh, no.

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On you go.

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OK. OK.

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Right. Amy, make Mr Van Gogh comfortable.

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Don't let any invisible monsters in through the front door.

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But it could be outside, waiting.

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Don't worry, I'll risk it. What's the worst that can happen?

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-You could get torn into pieces by a monster you can't see.

-Oh, right, yes. That.

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Don't worry. I'll be back before you can say, "Where's he got to now?"

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Not that fast!

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But pretty fast.

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See you around.

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SNORTING AND GRUMBLING

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DOCTOR WHISTLES

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FOOTSTEPS APPROACH

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Right. You in here somewhere? I can't apologise enough.

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I thought you were just a useless gadget. I thought you were just an embarrassing present

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from a dull godmother with two heads and bad breath. Twice.

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How wrong can a man be?

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Good.

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OK, you're working.

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Now, see what you make of this.

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Who is that?

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No, I know it's not that. There are thousands of them and you can see them plain as day.

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No. Definitely not. This is the problem with the impressionists -

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not accurate enough.

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This would never happen with Gainsborough or one of those proper painters.

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Sorry, Vincent.

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You'll just have to draw something better.

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That's better, old girl.

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Time-delay, but you always get it right in the end. Good.

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Let's find out who this is, then.

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Whoa, there you are, you poor thing.

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You brutal, murderous,

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abandoned thing.

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I hope we meet again soon so I can take you home.

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CREATURE ROARS

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Maybe not that soon.

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CREATURE WAILS

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WAILING AND CLATTERING

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Never do that! You scared the living daylights out of me.

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Sorry. I got bored.

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As much as you admire his command of colour and shape,

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it is hard to get fond of Vincent Van Gogh's snoring.

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HE SNORES

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Wake, wakey. Rise and shine!

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Breakfast is served in the courtyard.

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Whoa! What a morning.

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Come on.

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And Amy's got a little surprise for you.

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I thought I'd brighten things up to thank you for saving me last night.

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Ah!

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I thought you might like, you know,

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-possibly to perhaps paint them or something? Might be a thought.

-Yes.

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They're not my favourite flower.

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-YOU don't like sunflowers?

-No, it's not that I don't like them.

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I find them complex.

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Always somewhere between living and dying.

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Half-human as they turn to the sun. A little disgusting.

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But, you know,

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they are a challenge.

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And one I'm pretty sure you will rise to.

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But, moving on, there's something I need to show you.

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That's him.

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-And the eyes. Without mercy.

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This is a creature called the Krafayis.

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They travel in space, they travel as a pack.

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Scavenging across the universe.

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Sometimes one of them gets left behind

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and because they are a brutal race, the others never come back.

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so, dotted all around the universe are individual,

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utterly merciless, utterly abandoned Krafayis.

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And what they do is... Well, kill, until they're killed.

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Which they usually aren't. Because other creatures can't see them.

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-But I can.

-Yes. And that's why we are in a unique position today, my friend,

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to end this reign of terror.

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So, feeling like painting the church today?

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What about the monster?

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Take my word for it. If you paint it, he will come.

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-OK. I'll get my things.

-In your own time.

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I promise you, we'll be out of your hair by this time tomorrow.

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-This is risky.

-Riskier than normal?

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Well, think about it.

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This is the middle of Vincent Van Gogh's greatest year of painting.

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The result of our trip could be

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the brutal murder of the greatest artist who ever lived.

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Half the pictures on the wall of the Musee D'Orsay will disappear.

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And it will be our fault.

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Vincent? Vincent!

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Vincent, can I help?

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It's so clear you cannot help.

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And when you leave, and everyone always leaves,

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I will be left once more with an empty heart and no hope.

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My experience is that there is, you know, surprisingly, always hope.

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Then your experience is incomplete.

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I know how it will end.

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And it will not end well.

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Come on. Come out, let's go outside.

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Out!

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You get out.

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What are you doing here? What are you doing here?

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Very well. I'll leave. I'll leave you.

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VINCENT SOBS

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What's happening?

0:21:150:21:18

We're leaving.

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Everyone knows he's a delicate man.

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Just months from now he'll... he'll take his own life.

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Don't say that. Please.

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Come on. We have to do this on our own.

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Go to the church at the right time and hope the monster still turns up.

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I'm ready. Let's go.

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-I'm sorry you're so sad.

-But I'm not.

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Sometimes these moods torture me for weeks, for months.

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But I'm good now.

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If Amy Pond can soldier on, then so can Vincent Van Gogh.

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I'm not soldiering on. I'm fine.

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Oh, Amy.

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I hear the song of your sadness.

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You've lost someone, I think.

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I'm not sad.

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They why are you crying?

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It's all right. I understand.

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I'm not sure I do.

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OK. OK!

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So, now, we must have a plan. When the creature returns...

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-Then we shall fight him again.

-Well, yes, tick.

0:22:460:22:52

But last night we were lucky.

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Amy could have been killed.

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So this time, for a start,

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we have to make sure I can see him, too.

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And how are we meant to do that, suddenly?

0:22:590:23:02

The answer's in this box. I had an excellent, if smelly, godmother.

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Oh, no. It's that poor girl from he village.

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You do have a plan? Don't you?

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No.

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It's a thing - it's like a plan, but with more greatness.

0:23:390:23:41

And you'll be sure to tell me if you see any, you know, monsters.

0:23:490:23:54

Yes. While I may be mad, I'm not stupid.

0:23:540:23:58

No, quite.

0:23:580:24:01

And, to be honest...

0:24:010:24:03

..not sure about mad either.

0:24:050:24:07

It seems to me depression is a very complex...

0:24:070:24:11

Shh.

0:24:110:24:13

I'm working.

0:24:130:24:15

Well, yes. Paint.

0:24:150:24:20

Do painting!

0:24:200:24:23

I remember watching Michelangelo painting the Sistine Chapel.

0:24:250:24:28

Wow! What a whinger.

0:24:280:24:30

I said to him, "If you're scared of heights, you shouldn't have taken the job."

0:24:300:24:34

Shh!

0:24:340:24:35

And Picasso. What a ghastly old goat.

0:24:350:24:39

I kept telling him, "Concentrate, Pablo, it's one eye,

0:24:390:24:44

-"either side of the face."

-Quiet.

0:24:440:24:47

Is this how time normally passes?

0:24:490:24:52

Really slowly.

0:24:520:24:56

In the right order.

0:24:560:24:57

If there's one thing I can't stand, it's an unpunctual alien attack.

0:24:570:25:03

Are you OK? You seem a bit,

0:25:030:25:05

if I didn't know better, I'd say nervous.

0:25:050:25:08

There's something not right and I can't quite put my finger on it.

0:25:080:25:11

There. He's at the window.

0:25:110:25:15

-Where?

-There, on the right.

0:25:150:25:18

As I thought. Come on. I'm going in.

0:25:180:25:21

Well, I'm coming, too.

0:25:210:25:23

No. You're Vincent Van Gogh.

0:25:230:25:27

No.

0:25:270:25:29

But you're not armed.

0:25:290:25:31

-I am.

-What with?

0:25:310:25:32

Overconfidence, this and a small screwdriver. I'm sorted.

0:25:320:25:35

Just have to find the right crosactic setting, and stun him with it.

0:25:350:25:39

Sonic never fails. Anyway, Amy, only one thought,

0:25:390:25:42

one simple instruction - don't follow me under any circumstances.

0:25:420:25:48

I won't.

0:25:480:25:50

-Will you follow him?

-Of course.

0:25:540:25:57

I love you.

0:25:590:26:00

LOW GROWLING

0:26:550:26:57

-Has he moved?

-No. Just shifted to the next window.

0:27:210:27:24

But, wait!

0:27:260:27:27

He's turning now.

0:27:270:27:29

Damn. He's moved.

0:27:400:27:42

Aaagh!

0:27:430:27:44

-Doctor!

-Amy!

0:27:440:27:46

KRAFAYIS GROWLS

0:27:520:27:54

-Doctor!

-Argh! I thought I told you...

0:27:590:28:01

Never mind. We'll talk about it later. Quick. In here.

0:28:010:28:04

FOOTSTEPS THUD

0:28:050:28:09

(Absolutely quiet.)

0:28:090:28:12

Can you breathe a little quieter, please?

0:28:180:28:21

No!

0:28:210:28:23

-He's gone past.

-Shh.

0:28:310:28:33

KRAFAYIS GROWLS LOUDLY

0:28:430:28:44

AMY SCREAMS

0:28:440:28:45

I think he heard us.

0:28:450:28:47

That is impressive hearing he's got.

0:28:480:28:50

GROWLING

0:28:500:28:51

What's less impressive are our chances of survival.

0:28:520:28:55

AMY SCREAMS

0:28:550:28:56

Hey, are you looking for me, sonny?

0:28:560:28:59

Come on. Over here.

0:29:000:29:03

Because I'm right here waiting for you.

0:29:030:29:05

Come on. Quickly! Get behind me.

0:29:130:29:16

SCREWDRIVER WHIRS

0:29:160:29:17

Doing anything?

0:29:170:29:18

-Where is he?

-Where do you think he is, you idiot? Use your head.

0:29:230:29:27

-Anything?

-Nothing. In fact, he seemed to rather enjoy it.

0:29:270:29:32

-Ooh.

-Duck. Left.

0:29:330:29:36

-Right, sorry.

-Agh!

0:29:380:29:40

Your right, my left.

0:29:410:29:43

This is no good at all. Run like crazy and regroup.

0:29:430:29:45

Oh, come on, in here.

0:29:450:29:48

Right. OK.

0:30:010:30:03

-Here's the plan. Amy, Rory.

-Who?

0:30:030:30:05

Sorry, um, Vincent.

0:30:050:30:08

-What is the plan?

-I don't know, actually.

0:30:080:30:10

But in future, I'm just using this screwdriver for screwing in screws.

0:30:100:30:13

Give me a second. I'll be back.

0:30:130:30:15

-I suppose we could try talking to him.

-Talking to him?!

0:30:160:30:19

Well, yes. Might be interesting to know his side of the story.

0:30:190:30:23

Yes, though maybe he's not really in the mood for conversation

0:30:230:30:26

right at this precise moment.

0:30:260:30:28

BANGING, GROWLING

0:30:280:30:30

Well, no harm trying. Listen. Listen!

0:30:320:30:35

I know you can understand me.

0:30:370:30:39

Even though I know you won't understand why you can understand me.

0:30:390:30:45

I also know that no-one's talked to you for a pretty long stretch,

0:30:450:30:48

but please...listen.

0:30:480:30:50

I also don't belong on this planet.

0:30:540:30:56

I also am alone.

0:30:560:31:00

If you trust me, I'm sure we can come to some kind of,

0:31:010:31:05

you know, understanding.

0:31:050:31:06

And then, and then, who knows?

0:31:060:31:10

CRASH!

0:31:100:31:12

Over here, mate!

0:31:210:31:22

What's it up to now?

0:31:240:31:26

It's moving round the room. Feeling its way around.

0:31:260:31:29

-What?

-It's like it's trapped.

0:31:310:31:34

It's moving round the edges of the room.

0:31:340:31:37

I can't see a thing.

0:31:380:31:40

I am really stupid.

0:31:430:31:45

Oh, get a grip! This is not a moment to re-evaluate your self-esteem.

0:31:450:31:48

No, I am really stupid and I'm growing old.

0:31:480:31:53

Why does it attack, but never eat its victims?

0:31:530:31:55

And why was it abandoned by its pack and left here to die?

0:31:550:31:58

Why is it feeling its way helplessly around the walls of the room?

0:31:580:32:02

It can't see, it's blind.

0:32:030:32:06

That explains why it has such perfect hearing!

0:32:060:32:08

Which unfortunately also explains why it is now

0:32:080:32:11

turning around and heading straight for us.

0:32:110:32:13

Vincent. Vincent, what's happening?

0:32:130:32:16

It's charging now. Get back. Get back!

0:32:160:32:18

SQUELCHING

0:32:250:32:26

KRAFAYIS WAILS

0:32:300:32:34

He wasn't without mercy at all.

0:32:380:32:40

He was without sight.

0:32:400:32:42

I didn't mean that to happen.

0:32:440:32:45

I only meant to wound it, I never meant to...

0:32:450:32:48

He's trying to say something.

0:32:500:32:52

What is it?

0:32:540:32:55

I'm having trouble making it out. but I think he's saying,

0:32:550:32:59

"I'm afraid. I'm afraid."

0:32:590:33:02

There, there.

0:33:070:33:09

It's OK. You'll be fine. Ssh.

0:33:100:33:14

DOCTOR SIGHS

0:33:170:33:20

He was frightened.

0:33:250:33:28

And he lashed out.

0:33:280:33:29

Like humans, who lash out when they're frightened.

0:33:290:33:34

Like the villagers who scream at me.

0:33:340:33:36

Like the children who throw stones at me.

0:33:380:33:40

Sometimes winning - winning is no fun at all.

0:33:420:33:46

Hold my hand, Doctor.

0:34:050:34:09

Try to see what I see.

0:34:090:34:12

We are so lucky we are still alive to see this beautiful world.

0:34:120:34:16

Look at the sky.

0:34:160:34:18

It's not dark and black and without character.

0:34:180:34:23

The black is in fact deep blue.

0:34:230:34:25

And over there, lighter blue.

0:34:250:34:28

And blowing through the blueness and the blackness,

0:34:280:34:31

the wind swirling through the air and then,

0:34:310:34:33

shining, burning, bursting through - the stars!

0:34:330:34:37

Can you see how they roar their light?

0:34:370:34:39

Everywhere we look,

0:34:410:34:43

the complex magic of nature blazes before our eyes.

0:34:430:34:48

I've seen many things, my friend.

0:34:500:34:53

But you're right. Nothing quite as wonderful as the things you see.

0:34:530:35:01

I will miss you terribly.

0:35:100:35:11

I only wish I had something of real value to give you.

0:35:250:35:28

Oh, no, no. I could never accept such an extraordinary gift.

0:35:300:35:36

Very well.

0:35:360:35:38

You are not the first to decline the offer.

0:35:380:35:40

Amy, the blessed, the wonderful.

0:35:400:35:43

Be good to yourself and be kind to yourself.

0:35:450:35:48

I'll try my best.

0:35:480:35:50

And maybe give the beard a little trim before you next kiss someone.

0:35:500:35:53

I will. I will.

0:35:530:35:56

And if you tire of this Doctor of yours, return.

0:35:560:35:58

-And we will have children by the dozen.

-Eek!

0:35:580:36:01

Doctor, my friend.

0:36:030:36:04

We have fought monsters together and we have won.

0:36:040:36:08

On my own, I fear I may not do as well.

0:36:080:36:12

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

0:36:270:36:29

I was thinking I may need some food before we leave.

0:36:290:36:32

Well, no, you're not thinking exactly what I'm thinking.

0:36:320:36:35

Vincent!

0:36:350:36:36

Got something I'd like to show you.

0:36:390:36:42

Maybe just tidy yourself up a bit first.

0:36:420:36:44

Now, you know we've had quite a few chats about the possibility

0:36:480:36:52

there might be more to life than normal people imagine?

0:36:520:36:55

Yes.

0:36:550:36:57

Well, brace yourself, Vinny.

0:36:570:36:59

How come I'm the crazy one,

0:37:290:37:31

and you two have stayed sane?

0:37:310:37:34

-What do these things all do?

-Oh, a huge variety of things.

0:37:390:37:43

This one here, for instance, plays soothing music.

0:37:430:37:46

MUSIC PLAYS

0:37:460:37:48

While this one makes a huge amount of noise.

0:37:480:37:52

DISTORTED SOUND

0:37:520:37:54

And this one makes everything go tonto.

0:37:540:37:57

And this one?

0:38:050:38:06

-That's a friction contrafibulator!

-And this?

-That's ketchup.

0:38:060:38:10

And that one's mustard.

0:38:100:38:13

Mmm. Nice!

0:38:130:38:15

Come on. Back to the cafe, and you can tell me

0:38:150:38:18

about all the wonders of the universe.

0:38:180:38:20

Good idea. Although, actually,

0:38:200:38:22

there's a little something I'd like to show you first.

0:38:220:38:25

Where are we?

0:38:300:38:32

Paris. 2010 AD.

0:38:320:38:34

And this is the mighty Musee D'Orsay.

0:38:340:38:36

Home to many of the greatest paintings in history.

0:38:360:38:39

Oh, that's wonderful.

0:38:390:38:42

Ignore that.

0:38:420:38:43

I've got something more important to show you.

0:38:430:38:46

# Take all your chances while you can

0:38:460:38:51

# You never know when they'll pass you by

0:38:540:39:00

# Like a sum the mathematician cannot solve

0:39:030:39:09

# Like me trying my hardest to explain

0:39:110:39:18

# It's all about your cries and kisses

0:39:360:39:44

# Those first steps that

0:39:440:39:49

# I can't calculate... #

0:39:490:39:54

Dr Black, we met a few days ago.

0:39:540:39:58

I asked you about the church at Auvers.

0:39:580:40:00

Oh, yes. Glad to be of help. >

0:40:000:40:02

You were nice about my tie.

0:40:020:40:04

Yes. And today is another cracker, if I may say so.

0:40:040:40:07

But I just wondered, between you and me, in 100 words,

0:40:070:40:11

where do you think Van Gogh rates in the history of art?

0:40:110:40:16

Well, big question.

0:40:160:40:20

But, to me, Van Gogh is the finest painter of them all.

0:40:200:40:24

Certainly, the most popular, great painter of all time,

0:40:240:40:30

the most beloved.

0:40:300:40:31

His command of colour the most magnificent.

0:40:310:40:34

He transformed the pain of his tormented life into ecstatic beauty.

0:40:340:40:41

Pain is easy to portray, but to use your passion and pain

0:40:410:40:45

to portray the ecstasy and joy and magnificence of our world -

0:40:450:40:50

no-one had ever done it before.

0:40:500:40:52

Perhaps no-one ever will again.

0:40:520:40:55

To my mind, that strange, wild man who roamed the fields of Provence

0:40:550:41:02

was not only the world's greatest artist,

0:41:020:41:05

but also one of the greatest men who ever lived.

0:41:050:41:10

Vincent. I'm sorry.

0:41:120:41:14

I'm sorry. Is it too much?

0:41:140:41:16

No. They are tears of joy.

0:41:170:41:21

Thank you, sir. Thank you.

0:41:240:41:27

You're welcome. You're welcome.

0:41:270:41:30

Sorry about the beard.

0:41:300:41:33

# It's all about your cries and kisses

0:41:330:41:41

# It's all about you. #

0:41:410:41:45

This changes everything.

0:41:510:41:52

I'll step out tomorrow with my easel on my back a different man.

0:41:520:41:56

I still can't believe that one of the haystacks

0:41:560:41:58

was in the museum. How embarrassing.

0:41:580:42:00

It's been a great adventure and a great honour.

0:42:000:42:03

You've turned out to be the first doctor

0:42:040:42:06

ever actually to make a difference to my life.

0:42:060:42:09

I'm delighted. I won't ever forget you.

0:42:090:42:11

-And you are sure marriage is out of the question?

-This time.

0:42:130:42:17

I'm not really the marrying kind.

0:42:180:42:21

Come on. Let's go back to the gallery right now.

0:42:250:42:28

Time can be re-written. I know it can. Come on!

0:42:520:42:56

Oh, the long life of Vincent Van Gogh.

0:42:560:43:00

-There'll be hundreds of new paintings.

-I'm not sure there will.

0:43:000:43:03

Come on!

0:43:030:43:06

We have here the last work of Vincent Van Gogh,

0:43:170:43:21

who committed suicide at only 37.

0:43:210:43:24

He is now acknowledged to be one of the foremost artists of all time.

0:43:240:43:28

If you follow me now...

0:43:280:43:30

So, you were right. No new paintings.

0:43:340:43:37

We didn't make a difference at all.

0:43:400:43:42

I wouldn't say that.

0:43:420:43:45

The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things.

0:43:450:43:50

Hey.

0:43:510:43:53

The good things

0:43:530:43:55

don't always soften the bad things.

0:43:550:43:58

But, vice versa - the bad things don't necessarily

0:43:580:44:01

spoil the good things or make them unimportant.

0:44:010:44:03

And we definitely added to his pile of good things.

0:44:050:44:09

And if you look carefully...

0:44:090:44:12

..maybe we did indeed make a couple of little changes.

0:44:140:44:18

No Krafayis.

0:44:210:44:23

No Krafayis.

0:44:230:44:24

If we had got married, our kids would have had very, very red hair.

0:45:040:45:08

The ultimate ginger.

0:45:100:45:12

The ultimate ginge.

0:45:140:45:16

Brighter than sunflowers.

0:45:220:45:23

Hello? I need your help. There's been an accident.

0:45:370:45:41

CRASH What is he doing up there?

0:45:450:45:47

-Have you put the advert up yet?

-I did it today. Paper shop window.

0:45:470:45:50

-Find me a man.

-Yeah, otherwise you'll have to settle for me.

0:45:500:45:53

You'll have to settle for me first.

0:45:530:45:55

ELECTRICAL BUZZING

0:45:570:45:58

Oh, I love you, I love you, I love you.

0:45:580:46:00

I love you. I love you.

0:46:000:46:03

Well, that's good, cos I'm your new lodger.

0:46:030:46:05

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0:46:220:46:25

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0:46:250:46:28

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