10/02/2014 EastEnders

Stacey!

Stace!

KAT BANGS ON THE WINDOW

Stacey!

SHE RINGS THE BELL

-Can you let me off?

-Sorry, love. Not till the next bus stop.

-Look, just open the door and let me off!

-I'm sorry.

Where have you been?

Just about to dish up the curry.

-Curry? No, we can do better than that, can't we?

-Definitely.

-We're going back over to the Vic. All of us.

-Get changed first.

-All right.

-Why are we going to the Vic? The dinner's ready.

-Celebrate our engagement.

Be quick.

FAINT RINGING

-You all right?

-Why, don't I look it?

-Yeah, you do. You look great.

-I know it's a little bit sudden.

-You can say that again.

One minute, you're microwaving a masala. Next thing, we're sorting out your hen do.

-You only said no to him last week.

-This week,

-I

-did the asking.

-What?

-Yeah.

-Mum, look, things are a bit weird right now.

Sure you don't want a bit of time to think about this?

I've been thinking about this for the last 30 years.

-It's about time I made a decision, don't you think?

-Come on. We ready?

-KNOCKING ON DOOR

-I'm going to have to get changed.

-Have you got hold of Whit?

-Yeah, she's meeting us there.

-What about the kids?

-Yeah, Liam's picking them up for me.

-Oh, Max.

-All right?

-Yeah.

-Only popped over to see how you're doing.

-Good. You're just in time.

-You can come and help us celebrate Mum's good news.

-Er...

Mum's and Dad's.

-Can I help?

-Yeah. A few minutes ago, a woman came in here,

mid 20s, long, dark hair.

-Red coat.

-Yes?

Does she come in here a lot? Is she a regular punter?

Don't matter.

-Well, that was a waste of time.

-What was?

Just done over an hour with David Wicks

showing him round number 43. I took him to the pub to seal the deal,

-Carol comes in... All of a sudden, the whole thing's off.

-Brilliant.

Playing games, was he?

He was playing something, yeah.

He's not the only one.

Just been doing the VAT return.

What's wrong with it?

Nothing Revenue and Customs will notice...

with a bit of luck.

Bill, lock up for us, will you?

Yeah, I really need a drink after that. Lucy's coming with me.

Right. So, I'm the only one that's not invited, yeah?

I'll take that as a yes.

I'm not a dogsbody, you know?

Janine did leave me in charge.

You all right?

No, not really.

This has got to be a wind-up, hasn't it?

He was history last week.

I don't think David's ever been history.

He certainly isn't now, is he?

-Come on, sis. You've only just come out from your first chemo.

-Meaning?

-He's the last person you should be getting involved now.

-What, cos I'm ill?

Well, if you ain't now, you soon will be...with him hanging about.

Go on, tell me. How many times has he let you down?

Tell me. Or can't you remember cos you've lost count?

-Max, back off. I'm sick of people telling me what to do.

-He's going to walk out on you,

first sign of trouble, like he always has. Then you won't

-just have your illness to deal with, you'll have all of that as well.

-Is there a problem?

Yes, there is, mate. You. I'm just trying to talk to my sister.

-That's a shame cos my fiancee's having a drink with her family.

-What's the matter, Max?

-What's the matter with you, B? What are you getting involved for?

-Shut up.

-Was I talking to you?

-Dad, just calm down.

-My sister's going to make the biggest mistake of her life.

-You want me to calm down?

-One more word and I swear, I'll swing for you.

Right. As we're in the mood for celebrating...

-You must be joking. Take that back, Mick.

-Leave that there please, Mick.

-No, there's been a mistake.

There's been a big, big mistake.

The way I see it is very simple. These people want to celebrate,

you don't, so why don't you just let them do what they want to do?

Just go, Max.

Thank you.

-Go and talk to him.

-Me?

Well, if I go, he'll bite my head off.

Oh, but it's all right for him to bite MY head off, though, is it?

Please, Jay.

What are you doing?

-Oh, you don't mind, do you? My laptop's on a go-slow so...

-Er...

-I just need to check my e-mails.

-Yeah, no, I actually need to check something myself so...

-OK. It's all yours.

-Thanks.

So, who's Muneer?

There was an instant message on screen when I logged in.

I don't know.

-He seemed to know you.

-Did he?

-Mmm.

Yeah. Called you "darling".

A boy.

But don't tell Dad. You know what he's like.

"Who is he? Where does he come from? What does he do?"

-And?

-We're just talking, Tam. Nothing else.

-You did the right thing, you know? Giving Dad a second chance.

-OK.

So, what does this boy do?

He was in my study group.

-So, you've known him a while?

-Yes!

He was asking where you lived and what you did so...

-What's CR & NR?

-What?

You were just on their website. I checked the internet history.

-You snoop on me, Tamwar...

-I didn't snoop.

Yes, well, I did and you were on their jobs page.

I thought you'd sorted things out with your boss.

It's not going to be easy with a tyrant.

-Time to move on from the market?

-Well, I might not have a choice.

-There may not be a market much longer.

-What?!

Don't say anything, cos it's not definite, so don't tell anyone.

-What?

-It's nothing.

Nothing at all.

All right?

Better than my sister.

She's gone soft in the head.

She's a grown woman, I suppose.

Just a shame she can't find a grown man.

Still, it's nice to see her smiling, isn't it?

It won't last.

Hey.

There must be something in the air with them lot.

Look at this. Saw this online last night.

-A dating site, Whit?

-Yeah. Come on. You've got to meet someone.

-Not interested.

-Not interested in what?

You can meet anyone online. A real weirdo.

-Or Mr Right.

-Definitely aren't going to meet him in here.

-Meet who?

-Let's fix up a loudspeaker, shall we?

-Yeah, we'll broadcast it to the whole square...

-Broadcast what?

Nothing.

Sorry, Mick...

-can I have a word, please?

-Yeah.

-Look, let's use that one.

-No! Use that one. It's better.

Nah, don't you think he looks a bit, like...pretty?

-Yeah, that's the point.

-Excuse me. Didn't Johnny just say no to all that?

-All right. Go on, that one.

-Even a couple of hours would help.

-Sorry, mate. We're fully staffed.

-Come on. You must need some help.

-Listen, after shelling out

-to fix the damp in this place, I can't afford it, I'm sorry.

-No worries.

Mick, do us a favour?

-You celebrating something?

-Razor sharp as ever, Ian.

-Can't get anything past you, can we?

-What did you do, sell a moped?

Planning our wedding, actually. Here you are.

Carol and I are getting engaged. Money on there. Ta.

So I hope you're not planning yours any time soon

cos I don't want to upstage you.

Here you are.

There's a word for this, Danny.

Embezzlement.

I am the one Janine's accountants will be coming after when they spot it.

I sorted you a flat, I helped you get back on your feet.

I know. You've been brilliant.

And you are just taking me for a mug here.

Well, actually, there's two words for it.

Just desserts.

We're the only ones keeping this business afloat.

Without me and you, it would have gone under weeks ago. You know that.

We're making money hand over fist for Janine and what's she doing? Sitting on her backside.

She's not exactly sunning herself in the Caribbean, is she?

She's not putting the graft in, though, either, is she?

I'd have had to tell you about this anyway.

I mean, I couldn't keep it to myself forever, could I?

How are you expecting to keep this from ANYBODY?

It's about five grand that's gone missing so far.

Yeah?

It could be a lot more...

and no-one would be any the wiser. Just me and you.

How do you work that out?

-Cheers.

-To us.

-To you.

Maybe we should do the same.

What, drink free champagne all evening? Count me in.

No. Set a date.

David and Carol have just got engaged.

Poor cow. As if she hasn't got enough on her plate.

I thought maybe we should get in first, stop them stealing our thunder.

Back in a sec.

YOU and...?

-And you are?

-Aleks. The Market Inspector.

Denise.

I mind my own business.

G'day, sugar!

-ALFIE LAUGHS Very nice.

-Thank you.

Well, I got one for Bert, one for Ernie...

one for Tommy, but saving the best for last...

Hello, what's your name? I've come all the way from Australia to see you.

-It's good to see you, darling.

-You too.

-Muppet.

-Listen, I was thinking on the way over and I had a long time to think... It was a long flight.

No wonder we don't see much of Spencer and Vicki. I was thinking, "Do I turn up, hot and sweaty,

"suitcase full of dirty clothes and go, 'G'day, Sheila'?"

Or I was thinking we celebrate in style, a night in a hotel,

just me and you, a bit of the old...

Anyway, listen, I didn't actually make a big fortune out there, darling.

But you'll be glad to know that I did make a few quid

and I've got enough money that we can do up the place.

Seriously, it's enough that we can get new carpets, curtains,

probably give it a lick of paint. There you go, darling.

We can turn it into a right little palace, I promise you.

You're going to love it. But I've got plans. I've got proper plans.

I can't say too much about it, but I've got something arriving in a couple of weeks' time.

What's the matter?

-How do you mean?

-I don't know. You tell me.

-Kat, this is non-alcoholic, if that's what you're worried about.

-No, I'm not worried about that.

Then what are you...?

Oh, no, no, no.

-It's not the babies, is it?

-No! No, they're fine.

I think I saw Stacey.

-What?

-Yeah, on the bus. On the way here.

-You saw Stacey on the bus?

No, no. She was going into a hairdressers.

-What, Stacey as in...

-Stacey.

-Stacey?

Queen of Sheba, Stacey. Stacey! Yes!

I got off, I went to look for her, but she'd already left.

I'm sure it was her. I KNOW it was her.

-I've got to go back.

-Kat, please...

-Alfie, I have to find out, all right? Please, can we just go?

-Kat...

Maybe he's changed.

Oh, yeah? Leopards and spots...

-Stranger things have happened.

-He's just bad news, all right, Abs?

-It's the last thing Carol needs more of right now.

-Well, you did it.

-What?

-Changed your spots.

-Don't compare me to him.

Well, no, I'm just saying you haven't always been Snow White.

Yeah, but the difference is I learnt from my mistakes. He hasn't.

You joining me or what?

Well, no. I'm going back to the Vic.

There's a family celebration going on, remember?

OK, look. Bought it online.

Picked it up on the way back from the airport.

It's like the other one, only it's got new alloys,

-I've got the furry dice... It's all right, we can afford it.

-Can we go, please?

Kat, are you sure about this? I mean, Stace?! Come on.

This is the last place she's going to want to be,

-yet you said you saw her walking round having her barnet done...

-Can we just go, please?

I've been having a look at some dates for the wedding.

Now, we can do this Saturday, but we can't do that one.

-Can we talk about this later?

-We don't want to leave it too long, do we?

-I'm helping Bobby with his spelling bee.

-But this is our wedding.

-It's me against Tiff Butcher.

-No contest.

-Definitely not.

Oh! So, what's happened to love's young dream, then?

-DOORBELL RINGS

-That'll be Fatboy.

-Fatboy?

-Yeah. Look, I'll leave this here with you, yeah?

-Yeah.

It's OK, yeah?

Yeah. I said, "Yeah."

Right. What's the next word we've got?

Excuse me. I was in earlier.

That girl that I was talking to you about, she's a friend...

she's a relative and I haven't seen her for a while

and I wondered if you had an address or a phone number for her?

-We're actually closing.

-I'm not asking you to break the Official Secrets Act here or anything.

-Kat...

-All right. All right. You don't have to give me her address,

all I'm asking for is a phone number.

What's her name?

I've got a photo here. Hold on.

It is her, isn't it?

Will you just tell me, you snooty cow?

-Right. I think you'd better leave.

-I'll have a look for myself.

-Whoa, whoa. Kat! Kat!

I'm calling the police right now.

Listen, sweetheart, we're going. We're sorry. Kat, please, come on.

Sorry, darling.

It was her. She recognised her. You saw her face.

I'm sorry about all that trouble you've gone to,

but I just want to go home. I'm not in the mood now.

It's clever.

Still fraud though.

Right.

You see this?

This is from just me being in the know.

You imagine if it was both of us.

The sky would be the limit.

Come on, Luce. Live a little bit.

What's the point of playing it safe all your life? Where's that going to get you, eh?

Thought you two had gone to the Vic.

Saw the light on, thought someone had broke in.

Oh, we just had a bit of business to finish off.

But thanks for checking.

Yeah, thanks, Bill. Really appreciate it.

Yeah, well, like I said before, Janine did leave me in charge. OK?

You and me, yeah?

50-50?

Slow down. It was my idea.

And this is me not calling the police.

Well, that doesn't seem very fair, does it?

Life isn't fair.

Just ask Janine.

You just said it.

The two of us working together...

sky would be the limit.

I'll take that as a yes.

Take it as a yes.

Dad?

-I just want to help.

-What with?

-Oh, come on. Don't pretend you weren't talking about me earlier on.

Tam couldn't leave the room fast enough.

Look, I got us into this mess, just let me help us get out of it.

Who's Muneer?

We weren't talking about you. We were talking about the market.

-It's closing.

-What?!

-It might be. Tam only just found out yesterday.

What's Tam going to do? What are we going to do?

We need his wages.

-You've got your job back.

-Yes, but have you seen our debts?

And I'm applying for a couple of jobs myself.

COMPUTER BEEPS Oh, that could be one of them

coming back to me now.

-So, is it?

-Just give me a few minutes.

-I don't know what's wrong with you lot. He's not going to go for it, you know?

-Go for what?

-He doesn't have to.

-It'll be fine. We'll just go through all the replies

-and pick out all the best-looking boys.

-Yeah, thank you.

Anyway, by the time Johnny knows anything about it,

-his hot date will already be here.

-You can't do that to people, though.

MOBILE BEEPS What? No way! We've already got one.

-Nancy...

-What does he say?

-Don't matter what he says.

I said leave it.

See?

Wait till Tiff hears about it.

She'll sign herself up as bridesmaid and Morgan as page boy.

Seen your dad?

Yeah.

And?

He'll come round. You've just got to give him time.

-You must really think I'm desperate.

-No. Look, I am.

The sooner Mum sees you with someone, the sooner she'll get over it,

the sooner she'll get off all our backs.

This guy actually sounds all right.

He's got a bit of a stupid name. He's called the Walford Wonder.

Will you please just have a look?

No.

Right. I'm just going to leave it there.

Just in case.

-All right?

-Yeah.

-You and Ian seem very, um, pally all of a sudden.

Yeah, well, he's offered me a job.

Or a trial, as a waiter.

That is if it's OK with you?

Normally, I wouldn't, but I really kind of need the dosh right now.

It's got nothing to do with me, has it?

Well, he seems to think he's going to need a bit of extra help

with all the wedding plans and arrangements.

So, yeah...

DOOR SHUTS

Abi gave me her keys.

I can go straight back out if you want.

Here.

It's not exactly champagne, but if you don't mind slumming it...

I don't mind.

That's just as well with that geezer of yours.

I haven't come for more of the same, Max.

So, why have you come here?

-Cos I'm fed up.

-What? Of me?

I'm fed up of being scared all the time.

Scared of this illness, scared of the future,

scared of getting hurt.

And that's the worst thing.

I've finally come to realise that.

It's not actually the illness or the future or actually getting hurt.

It's just being scared. That's the worst bit.

It's already happened, hasn't it?

You've only been engaged to him five minutes.

-You're already not making sense.

-And if it doesn't work out,

at least I didn't run away like a frightened kid.

-Maybe you should do the same.

-Well, what's that, then?

-Not run away from things.

-Who said I am?

Tanya's been gone a while now,

Kirsty's out of your hair, the girls are on an even keel

and here you are sitting all on your own.

-So what? I'm happy.

-Your family and friends are all over the Vic...

You're giving me relationship advice?

You're getting hitched to David Wicks. He is a walking, talking, disaster area.

-Oh, well, that's a start, I suppose.

-What is?

Half-an-hour ago, you were saying, "No way. It ain't working."

I can't change what you're doing, Carol...

but it's wrong.

Yeah, well, you know where we are if you change your mind.

She has to be local.

I mean, you don't travel miles just to get you hair done.

-You've got a scan date.

-What?

-Scan date. It's tomorrow. You never said.

-I was going to.

Right.

-Because of this woman you think you saw...

-Stacey, yeah.

-No, you THOUGHT was Stacey.

-It WAS Stacey!

-OK, sweetheart.

If it was her, why didn't she call to say hello?

I know she doesn't want the police to know she's here,

but she would have called to see how you are, the rest of the family.

-I don't know.

-You wanted it to be her.

Alfie, I know it was her.

Kat, listen, I've been away ages,

-working for us, for our family, for our babies.

-Hold on.

I didn't ask you to go to Australia. That was your idea.

Are you not going to ask what I've done out there, how I've got on?

Things that are actually quite important, all right?

-And my cousin isn't important?

-In case you hadn't noticed, I haven't even seen Tommy yet, have I?

-Yeah, sorry. I'll go and get him.

-Kat, listen...

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Listen, I'm tired, that's all.

ALFIE SIGHS

Kat, you saw somebody for...

a couple of seconds, you know?

Someone who probably looked like her, yeah?

-Yeah?

-Yeah, you're right.

Come on. Give us a kiss.

-Well, there's hope for us all, isn't there?

-What do you mean?

Your mum and dad tying the knot at their age...

Makes you think, doesn't it?

Oh, I'll see you back there. Kat!

How was the reunion?

-It was good, yeah.

-We've been having a pretty good time here ourselves.

-You're never going to believe what's happened.

-I'll phone you later. Tell me, then, yeah?

-All right.

MOBILE BEEPS

DOORBELL RINGS

-DOORBELL RINGS AGAIN

-Yes, all right. I'm coming.

-All right?

-Yeah.

I've seen Stacey.

-You what?

-Alfie keeps telling me I didn't, but it was only for a second or two,

but I know... I know it was her.

-Stacey?

-She's back.