15/07/2016 EastEnders

FRONT DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES

Lauren?

Whit?

Lee! Oi.

Told your dad we needed an en-suite. You're on breakfast, cos I'm late for this flipping wedding

-and I ain't even seen Sharon yet.

-Can't Dad do it?

Oh, no. He's at the breakfast cocktails, cos a week's boozing in Prague just weren't enough.

And Johnny's in bed with a hangover.

I'm sensing a theme here!

KNOCK ON DOOR

Whit? Come on. Hurry up, babe. I'm busting here.

Yeah, all right. I won't be long.

Oh!

SHE SIGHS

I could get used to you staying over.

Have you seen the photos Lauren sent?

I reckon that one.

It's got a nice family feel to it.

What, the Addams Family? Bit grumpy, aren't we?

Sorry. I'm sorry.

It's fine.

Ain't your family that's the problem, anyway.

Still worried about your dad?

I'm taking him to the hospital before work.

I'm going to tell him on the way.

Maybe he'll be proud.

Have you met my dad?

It ain't just about managing Cokers.

I've gotta tell him I'm quitting the Arches and all.

-Wish me luck.

-I'll walk with you.

Oh, Paul? Can I talk to you about something?

Can it wait till I'm on the stall?

I'm at the trade fair all day.

Er, I tell you what - why don't I cook us

a nice lasagne this evening and we can have a chat then?

All this home cooking.

Is anything wrong?

No, everything's fine.

And Paul - just the three of us, if that's all right.

OK.

And into the tunnel. Go on.

You not want it? No, not with a big bite of the spoon.

Er, you couldn't take over for me, could you?

Cos, er, I have a blinding headache.

No, absolutely not. I can't. It's too cute.

Oh, I'm sorry about last night. I was a mess.

That's all right. Don't worry about it.

Come on, then, muscles!

Choo-choo.

Open your mouth. No.

SHE GIGGLES

Welcome to your new home.

Was it a rough night?

-Well, it's feeling like it now.

-BABY GURGLES

Shouldn't you be in bed, you know, with some paracetamol?

Well, that's not the only way to cure a hangover.

No.

I need to unpack! Did I miss anything last night?

You were there for the Electric Slide, right?

-SHE GASPS:

-No!

Lucky you. Cos people were taking it very seriously.

Sorry. What are you trying to say?

What? You think I don't have the moves?

-Sorry, give me a minute.

-I really don't think you have the moves.

Here we go. Here you go, Louise. Here's Mum dancing.

-Right, OK. Yeah, OK.

-Mum dancing?

-Yeah. Mum.

-Join in if you can.

Well, I will and I'll show you how to do it properly. Yeah, and then...

-Woo!

-Ha-ha!

Need a hand moving anything over?

No. No, we're all good, thank you.

I am looking forward to spending some more time with you. Yeah, I am.

Right, don't forget - 11 o'clock.

What's happening at 11 o'clock?

I said I would help Dad out while he's with Jane.

But don't worry - I spoke to Dot and she can look after Louie.

-So you can come and do your work in the caff.

-Oh.

That is as long as you don't distract me. Er, yeah.

You could distract me now a little, if you like.

MOBILE TEXT ALERT

Oh. Sorry.

What's up?

It's Abi.

I hope you haven't forgotten about our delivery this morning.

And I hope you haven't forgotten that it's my afternoon off.

Nah, I haven't, actually. Planning something nice with Buster, are we?

Come here. Argh!

So what do you want? Want some eggs? Soldiers?

-Bit of toast?

-Chocolate.

-Yeah(!)

What about some cereal?

-Chocolate cereal?

-No!

I'm thinking more your raisins, your nuts - all the healthy stuff.

I'll just have crisps.

HE CLEARS HIS THROAT

-Bet you can't wait to see Michelle.

-Yeah. You could say that.

I'm sure she'll appreciate you flying over.

Well, it's a bit more complicated than that.

-Oh, no, of course, but, er...

-Right, that's it.

Oh, is that all you're taking?

Yeah. Yeah, I'm not stopping long.

I dunno what you're going for.

It's like I said. I just need to sort a few things out.

-What things?

-Never you mind.

You don't have to worry about things here.

-MOBILE TEXT ALERT

-Right. That's the cab.

-Oh, I'll take your bag out for you.

-Cheers, Ian.

Ah, ready to go?

Oh, don't worry, Ben. I'm taking him on the way to the airport.

-I'm going to Florida.

-Florida?

-I'll explain when I get back, OK?

See ya.

Why's she going to Florida?

Mmm. She won't say.

I reckon she's a spy.

Or Minnie Mouse.

All right, moody?

I wanted to talk to him, didn't I?

Is this about your little photo shoot yesterday?

No, it's about YOU always sticking your beak in!

Pam and Les are retiring, all right?

-Me and Paul are going to be managing Cokers.

-Urgh! Creepy!

I never want to see another funeral as long as I live.

I don't think Dad's going to like it, either.

Why, cos you're quitting the Arches?

-Killing the family business?

-I'm not killing...!

I just don't know how he's going to feel about it, all right?

Right. Cos that's your problem. Dad.

-And what's that supposed to mean?

-Nothing.

HE MUTTERS

SHE LAUGHS

DOOR SLAMS

Is it true, then?

What am I supposed to do, Abi?

Whitney's my best mate. I've got to tell her.

And I'm your sister.

I wasn't thinking. It was when Ben was going to break up with me.

I was trying to get pregnant.

How could you even do that?

After everything Dad's done to Mum, as well?

Whoa, this is nothing like Dad! It was one mistake.

What about last night?

Oh, we were just chatting!

I mean it, it was a one-off. And it does take two, you know.

Yes, I know. I know it does. That's why I need to tell her.

She needs to know what kind of bloke she's dealing with.

-Oh, why? Cos you've never made a mistake.

-Yeah.

Yeah, I have - plenty. Me and Jake, we nearly split up a family.

I'm not going to let that happen to Whit.

Do you want her to end up like Sadie?

Look, please don't tell her. Not when I've just got my job back.

Look, thanks to you. I don't want to lose everything again.

You have to swear never to do anything stupid like this again.

Of course I won't!

All right.

All right, thanks! Well, er, I'd better get ready for work.

No. For the last time, you can't have any sweets.

Honey's made you something very nice.

Oh, yeah. And it's better than sweets. This is a magic potion.

Help you fight those evil germs that are around you.

Ha, ha! That's really...eurgh!

It's all muddy.

No, it's not. I cleared all the mud off.

This is 100% carrot and kale. Oh, and Brussels sprouts.

Cup of this every day and you'll soon be captain of the football team.

Yeah. That's going to give you superhuman powers.

I mean, what have you got to say about that?

It looks like poo.

Ooo, you! He said thank you.

-That's what you meant. Didn't you?

-SHE LAUGHS

HE SIGHS

-You all right?

-Yeah.

Remember I'm looking after Phil this afternoon.

That's the first I've heard.

Nah, I told you. We're all mucking in.

It's my turn to play nurse.

OK. Fine by me.

Well, er, I'd better get back to work.

DOOR CLOSES

Dad?

Er, what are you doing here? Work placement again?

-Half day.

-HE SNORTS

What?

You come to tell Dad it's over?

That ain't funny, all right?

I don't want him thinking I'm leaving him in the lurch.

Well, you kind of are. I mean, the Arches gone,

years of Mitchell history wiped from the Square.

Nah. Thanks, Lou. You're a massive help.

Seriously, why are you bothered about what Dad thinks?

He wouldn't like it if he knew I was dating my maths teacher,

-but that don't stop me.

-You what?

Joking! He is kind of fit, though.

Point is, live your own life.

-All right, Beyonce.

-Well, you don't, though, do you?

I saw you in the photo the other day,

flinching when Paul tried to kiss you.

It ain't the olden days, Ben.

You can kiss who you like now, you know.

What's that got to do with anything?

You act like this tough guy who does what he wants,

but you are always stressing about what everyone thinks about you.

No, I ain't, all right?

I just don't want Dad thinking I'm turning my back on the family.

You can't please everyone all the time.

And if you do, you're probably not doing anything interesting.

If you want something, go and get it.

Right, I better grab my lunch and go back to school.

Can't keep Mr Jefferson waiting.

Stop worrying about Dad and go and give your man a kiss.

JACK EXHALES

Right. Ahem! Me and you, we got some magic potions to be drinking.

HE EXHALES

I'm getting...lizards...snails...

Oh, yeah. ..puppy dog entrails. What are you getting?

Sick. HE LAUGHS

You ready?

One, two, three...

Argh!

What is THAT? Eurgh!

Right. I promise it's orange juice from now on. All right?

How's it going, Zuckerberg?

I can't really concentrate.

Is this about Abi?

She would kill me if she knew I was telling you this.

She's told me that she slept with Lee.

-Lee?

-Yeah.

-When?

-A couple of months ago.

-Does Whitney know?

-No. I don't think she'd want to know.

Ah, so what are you going to do?

I've seen what cheating does to people.

I don't want that for Whitney.

-What if he does it again?

-Er, I don't know.

Well, I've promised Abs.

I know that she's messed up,

but...deep down, she's just as insecure as Whitney.

-I'm her big sister. I'm supposed to be looking after her.

-Yeah?

But that doesn't mean you've got to lie for her as well.

Maybe she should just come clean.

Um, fish pie and two fish and chips?

-Fish and chips?

-Oh, yeah.

-Sorry.

-Thanks.

Er, do you have any idea when Babe's going to get in?

It's pretty hectic in there.

Oh, Abi. I'm so sorry. Did she not say? She's taken today off.

With a party of 15?! Oh, thanks a lot, Babe!

I'm not going back in there.

Oh, wow! You look gorgeous!

-Wow!

-I look like a child.

I mean, what is it with dress codes at weddings these days?

I love it. Can we do something like that for our big day?

Ha! What, Little Bo Peep?

See? And with the bridesmaids in tangerine,

we're going to look like a pack of party rings.

Right, Whit. Are you sure you're going to be all right with him?

-Yeah.

-It's not easy while you're running this place.

No. We'll have fun. Won't we, eh?

Yeah. Till his nappy starts leaking poo everywhere.

-Nice.

-You two - you give her a hand, won't you?

No. Don't worry about Lee. You should have seen him giving him his porridge. It was so cute.

He was doing aeroplanes and everything, weren't he?

-Aw, aeroplanes and beer breath.

-Get out of it!

That'll be us one day, won't it, Lee?

-Right, any problems - I'm on my mobile.

-Yeah.

And I'll be back just as soon as this awful wedding permits.

-See you later.

-Bye.

She's funny, your mum, in't she? He looks well like you today, Lee.

He's a good-looking kid, though, isn't he?

I tell you what - I'll serve these customers,

then we can take him upstairs for a bit, yeah?

-Is that all right with you, Johnny?

-You're all right. I've gotta

-crack on with work anyway.

-But you've got ten minutes yet.

How'd you get on at the hospital?

Er, they reckon a couple of aspirin and I'll be as good as new.

Lady Muck swanned off, has she?

Florida.

I'm sorry I missed her.

Means we can crack open the vodka, I suppose.

You know, I always thought it'd be me that'd end up like that.

There's still plenty of time.

Between the two of us, eh?

What you doing here, Shirl?

I told you. There's a rota.

And your shift just so happens to start when Sharon goes away?

All circumstantial. Don't prove nothing.

Something happened with Fishy Fred?

-Like what?

-I dunno. You tell me.

-Well, if you know something, Phil, then say it.

-What do I know, eh?

I'm either here or the hospital.

Buster and I may live together, but...

we hardly ever speak.

Half the time, he don't even know I'm there.

That's why Linda did that poxy makeover. Makeover?

I told her it was a stupid idea.

I...I ended up looking like something out of the circus!

Buster didn't even bat an eyelid.

I'd have noticed.

I'd have been in stitches. HE LAUGHS

Oh, hey! How'd it go with your dad?

CHEERING AND WOLF-WHISTLES

Wow! Is that cos of what I said in my text?

I haven't even read that yet.

I just want you to know that I love you.

And I couldn't be happier about us doing this together, Paul.

Telling my dad can wait.

Now. Come on. We've got somewhere to be.

Um... Ze, can you pack up the rest of the stuff?

Cheers, Ze.

Shirley Carter having a makeover.

I'll take you with me next time. You can have a manicure.

See, me and Buster - we don't...we don't do this.

-I'm with Sharon.

-I know. I'm not an idiot.

But you and me. We get each other, Phil.

-It don't mean we're good for each other.

-I dunno.

-You tried to kill me.

-Details.

I mean it. Me and you, we...

We're bad news.

That's what Linda said.

-That's why I ignored her.

-Look at me, Shirl.

Take a...a good look.

Cos I'm dying.

I know.

Well, you're either with Buster or you ain't.

Well, I suppose he is bald and old.

Just your type.

Right.

I suppose I'll see you later.

Shirl.

Don't shoot him, will you?

DOOR CLOSES

HE SIGHS

-Abi, I need to talk to you.

-Well, can't it wait?

Johnny's with Ollie and people are taking the Mick with Linda away.

Er, no. It'll only take a minute.

Look, er, I know I said I wouldn't tell her...

Well, you promised.

Yeah... OK, I know. But she needs to know.

Look, you're going to have to find a way to tell her.

She ain't going to like it, but... but in the long run, you know...

I mean, imagine... Imagine if Ben hadn't told you about...

FOOTSTEPS APPROACH Lauren!

What are you doing here?

Um, seeing as you are here, can I have your help with something?

Do you mind, Abi? Just for a sec?

-Er, no. No, of course not.

-Thank you.

(Come here.)

What? Is everything OK?

Er, yeah. Well, I don't know. Look.

BAG RUSTLES

I think...

..I might be pregnant.

SHE GIGGLES

-Come on, slowcoach.

-Hey! Where you off to?

We're going for a kick-around. Only someone's heart's not in it.

Oi, oi, oi.

You don't just take, do you?

-Can I have a sweet?

-Please.

-Please?

Yeah, but only one.

Do you want to play football?

-Here you are.

-Yeah, go on, then.

Well done.

He tried to, er, copy me for Ramadan -

you know, fasting and all that - but he's too young. He's not allowed to.

So he decided to cut out sweets.

Now he's saved them up and wants to share them with his mates at Beavers.

I wish Richard had some of that self-control.

You know the Beavers are into all that, you know.

You should take him along. Trust me.

Put him in a room full of kids and a bit of dob-dob-dob -

-he'll be sharing out his sweets. See you later.

-See you later.

Hiya.

-You're all scrubbed up!

-Yeah.

-You off to your fishmonger's convention?

Funny enough, some of the guys down at Billingsgate

are having a reunion, so I thought I'd join em.

I got us a Chinese. Sweet and sour chicken.

I left you a note.

-I was at Phil's.

-Oh, right, yeah.

Well, I don't want to miss it.

It's at Croydon, so I thought I'd stay overnight, you know,

in case I have a drink.

Doing anything exciting?

Nah. Just watching telly.

Right.

I'd better get a wiggle on. Right, love ya.

How long?

Er, about a week. I'm usually bang on.

-What, you still haven't done a test?

-Er, no. I dropped it down the toilet.

THEY LAUGH I know!

But I've been so busy, I haven't had the time.

How are you feeling about it?

You know what I'm like. It's all I've ever wanted, innit?

A little family, me and Lee, our own little house.

But we ain't got a house. We ain't got money.

We're not even married yet, so...

SHE SIGHS

Does, um, does Lee know?

-I mean, have you...? Have you told him?

-No.

No, cos I wanted to be sure, you know.

But he'll be a great dad. He will. He'll be a great dad.

I'll have to find the right time to tell him, cos he's always busy,

and sometimes he can be a bit off with me, but he'll be fine.

-He will.

-Yeah. Do you think, um...?

I dunno. ..maybe...maybe he's not ready to be a dad?

No, he is.

He is.

What? What is it?

Er, look, I ain't told you this, right?

But when you were away, Lee was pretty bad.

It really stressed me out and Mick was really understanding.

I don't know why I'm telling you this. I kissed him.

Mick. ..I know! It was wrong, I know it was, and it was only for a second.

I just keep thinking, you know, like, what if I...?

What if I can't cope and I do something stupid like that again?

-No, you won't.

-Well, how do you know?

I can't go round behaving like that when I'm a mum, can I?

-Well, does Lee know that?

-Yeah. He forgave me.

I wouldn't have blamed him if he'd left me, but he didn't.

Well, just because you've made one mistake,

it don't make you a bad person.

Yeah. You're right. You're right. And do you know what?

What Lee done, it made me realise just how good he is.

This baby.

This baby could be the chance to start again, couldn't it?

You don't even know if you're pregnant yet!

Well, there's only one way to find out.

HE WHISTLES

You look stunning.

Now try and relax, Pam. You still haven't told me about

-the flower show.

-Oh, I don't want to go through that now, Les.

-I am doing the right thing, aren't I?

-Look, he's a big boy.

DOOR CLOSES And she is his mother.

-< LAUGHTER

-Careful!

-Shut up!

Oh, I didn't realise you were coming, Ben.

Yeah, we're just dropping Paul's stuff off, then we're off out.

Oh, sorry, I completely forgot!

Um, I can't go. Nan's...Nan's cooked me dinner.

-Oh.

-Er, I'm sorry, Ben.

Well, you know, let... let these boys have their fun.

-You know this can wait.

-No, no, it's OK.

No, your grandad is right. You two go.

Thank you. Oh, er, do you want to know where we've been?

Oh! They tattoos?

Oh! Oh, yeah. That's, er, very trendy.

Don't be silly, Les. They're not trendy!

They...they...they must be agony.

They don't scrub off, you know.

-Yeah, we know.

-That's the point.

Go on, you two. Off you go.

And don't go picking at those horrible things.

I don't want to be carting you off to the doctor's with skin infections.

Oh, er, hang on a second, before we go. Ben wants a picture of us.

One where we don't look like the Addams Family.

-It's fine. Leave it.

-No, no, no - family selfie!

Oh, I've got me apron on!

Even better. Come on. Hand me your phone.

Right, squidge in.

Come on. You, too.

-Yeah. Say cheese.

-ALL: Cheese!

CAMERA CLICKS

Oh, yeah - maybe that one's not for public viewing.

No, no, no. I'm going to text it to myself.

-All of my favourite people.

-Aw!

THEY LAUGH

Right, I'm just going to grab my wallet and then I'm all yours.

Er, no need. I'm paying.

All right, see you later.

There'll be plenty of time to tell him.

Mmm.

-Oh, I don't know.

-It's not going to do you any good not knowing, is it?

Me and Lee - we'd make it work, wouldn't we?

What's happened has happened, you know.

Just got to learn from it and you've got to move on.

Whitney, I'm so sorry.

What...what's the matter? Is Ollie all right?

Er, yeah. He's just with Johnny.

-I meant about...

-No, no, you just... What?

You messed up an order? Are you still going on about that?

What? But you said I should take responsibility.

And you have. Well done. Now go downstairs and don't do it again.

-But I was just going to...

-Ssh. Go downstairs, Abi!

You're really weird, do you know that?

-Bless her.

-Yeah!

Um...

look, sorry, but...

you've got more important things to think about, haven't you?

Yep.

WHITNEY SIGHS

DOOR CLOSES

So where are you actually taking me?

Well, er, I thought I wanted to show you off to the world.

But that's as far as I got.

Where do YOU want to go?

I honestly don't care.

Lee will be happy, if I am, won't he?

Yeah, yeah, course he will. Look, he'll be over the moon.

What does it say?

Look, maybe it's for the best, you know.

Um...

I'm pregnant.

I...I can't believe it!

I'm pregnant.