From Here to Maternity Holby City


From Here to Maternity

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-So that's the dream team?

-Case conference - do I invite Henrik Hanssen?

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Does Hanssen know she's about to spawn?

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You and him. Little and Large.

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-We're not joined at the hip.

-Glad to hear it.

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Mo here will be taking on your patient list.

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Well, I might be wrong but I don't think she's a consultant.

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What's life without a few risks?

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What is wrong with you?

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Is Luc coming back or isn't he? I kind of miss his bizarre charm.

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I've given Ms Campbell a very specific brief.

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She's here to ensure that Keller becomes a more cost-effective ward.

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-Turning medicine into a business?

-Profit guarantees the future.

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SHALLOW BREATHING

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Olympics guy - have you seen the file?

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-Sorry?

-Haseen, the porter. Where's the file?

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Right. It might be on top of the toilet.

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Waddle off, then.

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-What I'm going to say, don't freak out.

-What?

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-We might be at code red.

-Seriously?!

-Don't freak out!

-Wh... Are you sure?

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I think so. Pretty much.

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What should we do? Shall I phone Sorcia?

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No, you'll panic her. It could be days yet.

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Do you want me to drive you home?

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No, the Olympics guy.

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-Screw him, this is the big banana, mate.

-No fuss.

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We stick to the plan, OK?

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Did your mother never tell you it's rude to whisper?

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-Back off, Jac. Mo's...

-Mo's fine, yeah?

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-There's nothing to see here.

-Don't call me Jac...

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Notes. Hanssen's porter.

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What Hanssen porter?

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What Hanssen porter?

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Surely you're not bowing to pressure, Mr Hanssen.

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The board are keen he gets to participate in the opening ceremony.

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Oblivious to the PR disaster when it leaks that one of our porters leapfrogged the list.

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-No leapfrogging has occurred.

-But you are saying he's on someone else's list of one?

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Freeing up your time to meet your elective's targets.

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I know, I know, the regulators have got their fining hats on.

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-I've a good mind to call their mothers.

-Just get them done, please.

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I'll be glad when the Olympics are over.

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Oh, how can you say that? I am so excited I've got butterflies!

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Right, Ric's list. My list. Loser buys pizza for the whole team.

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-Except Mr Griffin isn't here today.

-I've not seen a leave form.

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-It's a three month check up with a specialist actually, arranged in haste.

-Right.

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-Well, there's no arguing with that one, is there?

-Not really, no.

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So, you want me to meet twice the target with the same number of staff?

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-I want you to organise your resources as you see fit.

-Mr Hanssen!

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Tell me, is that an angry little midwife I hear?

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I will shut down, Mr Hanssen! Do you hear me?

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Want me to engage you in high level bariatric discourse?

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No, no. One must face one's demons. Ms Rimini!

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I picked the wrong week to give up the Shiraz.

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How do you like the other side of the chair?

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He reckons he's Kimi Raikkonen!

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-We've put the Egyptian cotton on.

-Ah, thank you, mate.

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I know you've moved hell and high water.

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What've you got on Mr Hanssen, that's what we want to know?

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They've not cancelled some old gent to make this work, have they?

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Nope, just made a window, so to speak. Ms Effanga will be operating.

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Hi.

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You're joking! She's about to drop.

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Don't worry, I'm not due for another two weeks.

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I've had four. You're about to drop. Look at it.

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I bet it wasn't like that yesterday, was it?

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-Well, luckily it's a very short operation.

-Your first?

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-Yep.

-I can always tell. You been doing the exercises?

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Bed number eight, please.

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I suppose you want me to tell you about my part in the ceremony?

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Go on, then.

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I'm sworn to secrecy. So I'm not going to spoil it for you.

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Just chill out, yeah?

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If I need maternity advice, I'll ask the taxi driver.

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Is that porter having a transplant?

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Only you could make that sound bitter.

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Hernia.

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-He's the guy that's taking part in the opening ceremony.

-Typical.

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I'm sorry, how's that typical?

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In fact, technically, it's incredibly atypical.

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You're very jumpy. Something's up.

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Nothing is up.

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Sorcia, pick up. It's Mo. Obviously. You there?

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Listen, you're probably with a patient.

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Just so you know, I think we're at code...

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SHE GROANS

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Yeah. Braxton Hicks getting stronger. It's going to be this week.

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Right, I've redone this list. This is how we do 12 hernias in a 6-hour period.

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It should go like clockwork provided I don't need to eat

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-or have a pee.

-OK... Thank you.

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Is there a problem?

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No. I was going to nip out at lunch time, but it's not a big deal.

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If it's any consolation, there will still be pizza.

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Ah, this must be our mid-day.

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Er, no, I think that's our emergency from AAU. Erin Barker, abdo pain.

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Right.

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Yeah, she definitely looks like an emergency(!)

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Hello there, how can we help?

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I've had these pains, but they've gone, so we're wasting your time.

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It was so bad she couldn't even speak.

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-Imagine!

-I'm fine.

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I think they just wanted to get rid of me downstairs.

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It's understandable with the cuts, I suppose.

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-You did have a temperature.

-Had. Exactly.

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I think I just need a duvet day.

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-Fine. Do you want to be discharged?

-Can you not just look her over?

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-I'm asking the patient.

-Can you do that? Just like that?

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Absolutely. I'll just fill in a form. Bay three for now, thanks.

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Let's sweat her out. If she needs to stay, she'll stay.

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Eddi was really worried about her. What shall I say to her?

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Um, that she picked the wrong ward to off-load onto.

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-I can't say that.

-Yes, you can.

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This is not rocket science, OK? You call the lab, you tell them

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the patient has been moved to a different ward.

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Now are you going to step up and do your work properly

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or do I have to recommend some on-the-job training for you, nurse Keeley?

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Bit harsh, maybe?

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Sorry? Do you have some feedback about my managerial style?

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-Chrissie and I can hold the fort if you want to have some down time.

-No, I'm fine, thank you.

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Come on.

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-It's muffin o'clock.

-SHE SIGHS

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How about you and I leave this madness, grab a 'cino, you know,

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and talk through the Luc situation mano e mano?

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WHAT Luc situation?

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Excuse me.

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AKA the reason you're in this frankly horrific mood.

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-Seriously, Sacha, you need find something to keep you busy.

-All right, fine, I can take a hint.

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I'll just have to hand out the flak jackets.

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Sorry.

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Can I help you?

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Well, I just came to use the car park, really.

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What?

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It's cheaper than town, isn't it? I'm supposed to be buying dog food,

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but it's my leg.

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-I thought, while I'm in the area...

-What's wrong with it?

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-Twisted my ankle, playing footie.

-Which one, your left or your right?

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Er...

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Both.

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HE MOUTHS

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You know what, let's get you sat down in that nice comfy bed

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and I will make you a lovely cup of tea.

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-Yeah? Do you take sugar?

-Yeah. You got biscuits?

-We've got biscuits.

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I didn't mind Slumdog Millionaire. But I have to say, I didn't care for his other films.

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What's that one where the bloke chops off his arm?

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-127 Hours.

-That's the one. I didn't like it.

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I suppose you see that sort of thing every day, do you?

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She tends to do more high-tech stuff. This is just a favour.

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I did think that when I asked around.

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You know, I'm a bit embarrassed, to be honest.

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Don't be! Once-in-a-lifetime chance.

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Couldn't believe it when I got through.

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Don't ask me details, though. Wait to watch it on the TV.

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-I'll be sure and look out for you.

-MO GROANS

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-I told you. She's started.

-All OK?

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Yeah. Right, I'm pretty sure that the palpitations are due to

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your vagus nerve. How's the breathlessness?

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Hasn't interfered with me talking thankfully.

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-It's just the acid reflux. I've got to sleep sitting up.

-Sounds painful(!)

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Right, we'll get you done and dusted today, discharged tomorrow,

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London Friday.

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I'll be back in just one minute.

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-Not so fast, Batman.

-What?

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-Go down to Gynae and Obs and get checked over.

-I'm fine.

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-Mo!

-I'm not doing anything without Sorcia. It's just not fair.

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-You know that.

-Is she not on her way?

-Her mobile's off.

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Don't make arrangements with flaky psychiatrists!

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How's she planning on getting here, groovy train?

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-She's not flaky, she's just busy.

-How many you had?

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-They're not contractions. My waters haven't even broken.

-How many?

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I'm not going down to Maternity to make an idiot of myself.

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-Is it more than three?

-No. It's...three.

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Yeah, but what, twenty minutes apart? Maybe.

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-It's fine. She can cab it over.

-Mo, I'm going to get her.

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This is not code zero. This is DEFCON 3.

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Honestly, go, the paperwork could take ages.

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No, I'll drive you home.

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Declan, they're hacked off enough as it is.

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Yeah, but you're ill. What if it's the ulcer?

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I haven't got an ulcer. Stop making excuses and go to work.

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-Well, will you call me when you get back?

-Yeah, 'course.

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-I feel bad.

-Declan, go to work!

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-Hi, sorry, it's a bit urgent.

-Have the pains come back?

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Yesterday, I went to London and had a hysteroscopy.

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Do you think these could be side effects?

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Why were you referred?

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I referred myself. I was worried about bleeding.

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Right. Well, which clinic and what was their verdict?

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I haven't heard. Um...

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I had a miscarriage some months ago and I...

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Well, I just...

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I'm sorry to hear that. Do you think that's what's happening now?

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-No. We haven't... We're not...

-You're abstaining.

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Right, fine, well, first thing's first,

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get down to Obs and Gynae. It may be nothing,

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but there is a chance that the investigation may have caused a bit of damage.

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It'll be kept confidential, won't it?

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Of course.

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Though you need to be open with me, you understand?

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Sorry for giving you the run-around on everything.

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What are you doing out of bed?

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Er... They're just chucking me out now.

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Erin, I can tell you're not OK.

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What?

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-Actually, I would like to run a few more tests, just to be sure.

-Good.

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-Did AAU take your blood?

-Yeah. Yeah.

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-I can chase them up.

-Do you think she's got an ulcer, then?

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-Why do you say that?

-I haven't got an ulcer.

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You've been to see the doctor about it.

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Yeah, but he said it wasn't that.

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Right, well I can get someone to do an endoscopy.

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It's sticking a camera down your throat, I'm afraid.

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-She's had one of those. Haven't you?

-Yeah.

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Through work. I went to a private clinic.

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I'm sure I can get you the results.

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Can you not just do it again? Be on the safe side?

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Maybe you should give them a ring. Explain the situation.

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Get them to fax the results directly to me.

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She shouldn't be doing the donkey work, she's ill.

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OK, let's get you back to bed, keep you monitored,

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and chase up those endoscopy results.

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Nurse, could you come and take her back to bed, please?

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Thank you.

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Give Obs and Gynae a ring, give them the heads up

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-and get her down there somehow without giving the game away.

-OK.

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Did you ring Eddi and pass on my frustrations?

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Yeah.

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No.

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For the most part, you've been asymptomatic?

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Yes, more or less.

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It says here you think it was caused by a giant sneeze.

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I just said that to ensure confidentiality.

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Don't want to give away performance details.

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Right, well, let's get it fixed, shall we?

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Everyone in the company is very grateful.

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We've become like a family now.

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If we can't make exceptions for a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, where would we be?

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Oh, thank you, Mr Hanssen. Thank you so much.

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Thank you. Thank you, thank you.

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Thank you. Thank you.

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Thank you, Ms Effanga, for this.

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No worries. I'd just be at home shouting at Matthew Wright.

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You must understand, you're under no obligation.

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Don't worry, Mr H. I'm not going to take you to a tribunal.

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Still, we take our duty of care very seriously.

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Maternity leave is ring-fenced.

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Ms Effanga?

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Mm?

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May I say to the board that we will get our man to the finish line?

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Yeah, it's easy street. Takes me back to my youth.

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Excellent.

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-Mr Hanssen, can I have a word?

-I suppose so, yes.

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When I say word, I mean discuss the direction Darwin's going in.

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Fire away.

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Well, it struck me that we should be building on the stuff I did Stateside,

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look at expanding our congenital defects portfolio.

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-Led by you?

-Well, that would make sense, yes.

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OK, just so that I can manage your expectations realistically,

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I must say there is zero chance of any additional resources.

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If I were to free up anything for CT,

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it would go towards the transplant unit.

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Yes, but how long will that last?

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We've budgeted for the next four quarters.

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I mean when Ms Effanga goes on maternity.

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I think you'll find she returns fairly swiftly.

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Well, they all say that. But let's get real.

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We both know that she's the type who'll take a look at the teeny, tiny fingers and pack it all in.

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-BLEEPER

-The question is, where will that leave us?

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Excuse me.

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The doctor reckons you're free to go.

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That it? Seems a bit quick.

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Why? Somewhere you need to be, like court or something?

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No, no way! Why do you say that?

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No reason.

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Didn't even have the good manners to yelp.

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-Well, I'm still going to give it another go.

-Oh, come on.

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I'm really looking forward to you bawling him out of town.

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No, if he wanted that bed, he'd have faked appendicitis.

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Who are you and what've you done with Eddi?

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I am just giving him a second chance,

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cos I'm actually not in a horrifically bad mood.

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Ha-ha-ha! You see what you're doing?

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-Yeah, my job.

-It's called transference.

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You're throwing yourself into your work to avoid the painful black hole.

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Are you my painful black hole?

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OK, fine. I can take a hint.

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I'll just, you know, leave you to it.

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-What are you doing?

-Nothing.

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-Have you seen Jonny?

-Not recently. Why?

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Oh, I just need to check schedules.

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-Mo, are you about to go into labour?

-Labour?

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-No, my waters haven't even broken.

-Are you sure? Because you look like you're on another planet.

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Yes! Now, sorry but I have to prepare for theatre, OK?

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Fine.

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Just don't follow me into any lifts, got it?

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Right, I'm going to take you down to X-ray. Got it?

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X-ray. OK, thank you.

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I know it's all a bit daft.

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It's OK, you don't have to explain.

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-It just snowballed.

-You don't think he would've supported you?

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Probably.

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I should've said but...

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Losing a baby can be hard. Even if it is early on.

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Actually, do you know what?

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It was a huge relief. That's what I realised.

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Were they OK about it?

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No, they kicked off, so I told them to stuff it.

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-You didn't?

-It's not my fault.

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-It never is, is it?

-We can't all be workaholics.

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I'm just earning a living.

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Right, I'm going to take you down to X-ray now.

0:16:440:16:47

Great. I'll do it. Which way is it?

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Oh, you can't, I'm afraid. It has to be a nurse.

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-We came up ourselves.

-Yeah, I know, but it's health and safety gone a bit mad.

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Actually, I'm just going to check and see if that fax has arrived...

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Shall I take her down, then?

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Erm... Do you know, I think Radiology are just a bit backed up.

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-As soon as we get a window, I'll just whizz her down.

-Can we not make her urgent?

0:17:100:17:14

I know she seems OK, but she's not. I know it.

0:17:140:17:17

-Right.

-She won't say cos she's worried about her job,

0:17:170:17:20

but they're driving her into the ground with the stress.

0:17:200:17:23

That must be a worry for you.

0:17:230:17:24

She keeps going, "It's women's problems," to shut me up.

0:17:240:17:27

But whenever there's grief at work, these pains come on worse.

0:17:270:17:30

Now, I know I'm not a doctor and I know she won't listen to me.

0:17:300:17:33

-But please, someone needs to help her.

-I'll speak to her consultant.

0:17:330:17:38

Great. And just don't say it came from me, right?

0:17:380:17:41

'You need to stage an intervention.'

0:17:430:17:45

Enlighten me.

0:17:450:17:47

Effanga's gone into labour and won't go home.

0:17:470:17:49

-Really?

-Yes, really.

-And she told you this?

0:17:490:17:54

-Well, she's pretending it's fine.

-Why would she do that?

0:17:540:17:56

I don't know.

0:17:560:17:57

I'm guessing because she feels pressured to operate on the Olympian porter.

0:17:570:18:01

High profile and all that. Take her off it, I'll step in.

0:18:010:18:04

Well, I've seen some crafty back-biting in my time,

0:18:040:18:06

but that takes the biscuit.

0:18:060:18:08

I'm not lying. She's groaning like a Friesian.

0:18:080:18:11

I ignored your earlier intimations about Ms Effanga and her motives,

0:18:110:18:14

putting it down to professional jealousy. But I will not,

0:18:140:18:17

I repeat, not be drawn into this nonsense.

0:18:170:18:19

Mr Hanssen, she's a first time single mum who doesn't know what she's doing.

0:18:190:18:22

And you obviously know nothing at all about her situation.

0:18:220:18:25

Fine. Well, don't blame me when she's screaming in agony in theatre

0:18:250:18:29

and the porter's bleeding out.

0:18:290:18:31

Right, so once you've signed this, you're free to go. Any more trouble, go to your GP.

0:18:340:18:39

-OK?

-All right, yeah.

0:18:390:18:41

Unless there's something else that you're worried about?

0:18:440:18:48

-Nah, it's nothing.

-What's nothing?

0:18:480:18:52

The back of my leg, but it's fine. Ta-ra, then. Sorry to trouble you.

0:18:540:18:58

Well, why don't you let me take a look at it?

0:18:580:19:01

Well, seeing as I'm passing...

0:19:020:19:06

OK.

0:19:060:19:07

HE GROANS

0:19:170:19:19

Is this why you came in?

0:19:190:19:21

I was just thinking, as I'm passing, been thinking about it a bit, like.

0:19:210:19:26

-Eddi?

-Step away from the Rottweiler.

0:19:260:19:29

I can't help but meddle. It's my hands-on management style.

0:19:290:19:33

Do you realise he's got a lump on the back of his leg the size of a golf ball?

0:19:330:19:37

-Really?

-Yeah, and it's going to need removing or a biopsy.

0:19:370:19:40

-Well, he'll have to go to Keller then, I think.

-Why can't we do it down here? We're really quiet.

0:19:400:19:43

No, we've got to keep the theatre free, in case of...

0:19:430:19:46

-Someone who needs a procedure?

-No, surprises, you never know what might happen.

0:19:460:19:49

Sacha, if I let him go, he's not coming back.

0:19:490:19:52

-Eddi, he's not an emergency.

-Look, it is whipping out a chunk of flesh.

0:19:520:19:56

Really, I could do it. Come on, Sacha, he's bricking it.

0:19:560:20:00

No, sorry, I need to stay available for...

0:20:000:20:03

Oh, don't tell me. It's muffin o'clock?

0:20:030:20:05

-Ms Effanga, a word with you, please.

-Let me waddle to your service.

0:20:190:20:25

You understand, I hope, that I respect your decision

0:20:250:20:28

-to work until your due date?

-Uh-huh.

-And that by asking

0:20:280:20:31

after your progress, I'm not making any judgement about your fitness to work

0:20:310:20:34

or your skills or your long-term career choices?

0:20:340:20:38

Wow, they really are scared of being sued by pregnant ladies.

0:20:380:20:42

Ms Effanga, don't you think you should be at home?

0:20:420:20:46

OK, I had a show this morning and I've been getting some pains,

0:20:480:20:52

-but I really think it's early days.

-Let's take you off the case.

0:20:520:20:56

I'll ask Ms Naylor to do it, if necessary.

0:20:560:20:59

I'm one step ahead of you. I'm not daft.

0:20:590:21:01

They've said they'll take him on Keller. Serena Campbell will do it.

0:21:010:21:04

Well, that's excellent news. Transfer him and head home.

0:21:040:21:08

I can't. The mother, she's on her way here.

0:21:080:21:12

There's no point going home just to come back in.

0:21:120:21:14

At least head down towards Maternity? Just as a precaution?

0:21:140:21:17

-No, I don't want to start without her.

-You might not have a choice.

0:21:170:21:21

Jonny's gone to get her from work.

0:21:210:21:22

She's been through so much. I don't want her to miss anything.

0:21:220:21:25

That is understandable, but...

0:21:250:21:27

If my waters break, I'm down there. I promise.

0:21:270:21:30

If you can finish up those stitches and get him in to recovery, thank you.

0:21:300:21:35

Right, who's next?

0:21:350:21:36

Mrs Jenning.

0:21:370:21:39

What? Saves time.

0:21:410:21:43

It's amazing!

0:21:430:21:45

Think of it as the hernia Olympics. Theatre notes, please. Thank you.

0:21:450:21:48

Now, tell me good news and say we have some no shows.

0:21:480:21:51

-I am bored to tears of these already.

-Elective-wise, we're fine.

0:21:510:21:55

But emergencies, the boyfriend's still convinced it's an ulcer,

0:21:550:21:58

-he's being a bit tricky.

-Is she not Gynae's problem now?

0:21:580:22:00

-Well, I tried, but...

-OK, well, is she stable? How are her bloods?

0:22:000:22:04

-On their way from AAU. And yes.

-She needs that full ultrasound. Just get her down there.

0:22:040:22:08

I had a plan. I thought I could distract him by saying it's an MRI,

0:22:080:22:11

take her down the back lifts, and double-back through reception.

0:22:110:22:14

-But I'd need permission for fifteen minutes off the ward.

-No.

0:22:140:22:17

You're needed here. Elective hernias, our priority.

0:22:170:22:20

Very important elective hernias.

0:22:200:22:22

-But...

-Now I am sympathetic to her confidentiality issues,

0:22:220:22:25

but we cannot be drawn into an area that is essentially not our field.

0:22:250:22:28

So get her down there, let her deal with the fallout.

0:22:280:22:31

OK. Oh, and I said to Darwin, as a favour, we'd...

0:22:310:22:33

No!

0:22:330:22:34

No favours. No more sucking up the dross that no-one else wants to do.

0:22:340:22:38

Ric might've run this place like the court of Versailles,

0:22:380:22:40

but I will not. Are we clear?

0:22:400:22:42

Jonny, mate? Jonny, are you there?

0:22:420:22:45

How you doing?

0:22:450:22:47

Mate, they're like every ten minutes now.

0:22:470:22:49

Er... Take a paracetamol?

0:22:490:22:52

-Seriously, what do I do?

-Have your waters gone?

-No.

0:22:520:22:55

Well, that's a good sign.

0:22:550:22:58

Just hang on in there. I'm right outside her office.

0:22:580:23:01

HE PANTS

0:23:030:23:07

Chantelle, I give you the gift of Haseen.

0:23:130:23:17

We've not got a bed for you yet, so we'll just pop you here for now

0:23:170:23:20

-if that's OK.

-I'm all right in the chair. Better off upright, cos of the acid reflux.

-Great!

0:23:200:23:25

I'll leave you to it, yeah? Just got to go and, you know,

0:23:250:23:28

-go have a baby.

-Oh, so much good luck!

0:23:280:23:30

-Do you know when's it going to be?

-Could be pretty soon.

0:23:300:23:33

Remember, pain is just a sign it's going well!

0:23:330:23:36

-SHE GROANS IN PAIN

-Oh, Mo?

-I'm fine.

0:23:360:23:39

Betadine. Honestly, don't bother with the gas and air.

0:23:390:23:42

I'll just go and get my bag.

0:23:430:23:46

-Sorry, who is this patient?

-Mr Usman. Hiatus hernia.

0:23:480:23:53

-And you're dumping him here why?

-Staffing issue on Darwin.

-Well, we have staffing issues too,

0:23:530:23:57

so I'm asking you, please, deal with your own problems.

0:23:570:24:00

You can ask, but I'm out of here.

0:24:000:24:01

-Fine, I'll refer it up to Mr Hanssen.

-That's fine by me. That's the Olympics guy.

0:24:010:24:05

You're joking. You are actually joking... Ms Effanga!

0:24:050:24:08

Jayne, can you please take care of Mr Usman?

0:24:080:24:12

Nice girl. I'm in the opening ceremony, you know.

0:24:120:24:15

What did I just say?

0:24:150:24:17

Concentrate on elective hernias.

0:24:170:24:19

Exactly! So why you did you accept a patient from another ward?

0:24:190:24:22

Cos he's an elective hernia.

0:24:220:24:23

But not OUR elective hernia. Not on OUR list.

0:24:230:24:26

For heaven's sake, it's a simple enough instruction!

0:24:260:24:28

Mo's gone into labour.

0:24:280:24:30

Oh. Right, well, you've got a window to get her down to Obs and Gynae.

0:24:320:24:37

-Well, off you go.

-Obs and Gynae have just closed to new patients.

0:24:370:24:42

Have I got cancer?

0:24:490:24:52

The doctor will remove it and then we'll test it.

0:24:520:24:54

Right, when will that be?

0:24:540:24:56

-As soon as they can.

-Look, I'm not sure I can stay.

0:24:560:24:58

I'm not ready for it. I'm not psyched.

0:24:580:25:03

Think about something else. Are you going to watch the Olympics?

0:25:030:25:06

Er...

0:25:060:25:08

When's it on again?

0:25:080:25:10

OK. Just let your mind go completely blank. Yeah?

0:25:110:25:17

So you're on the beach and you can hear the waves

0:25:170:25:21

and they're lapping up against the shore.

0:25:210:25:25

And the palms are swaying and the waves are lapping...

0:25:250:25:31

Right, look, I've got him hypnotised. It's our only chance.

0:25:310:25:35

-Stop pressurising me!

-What, to do some work?

-I don't think you're calling it right.

0:25:350:25:38

Please, Sacha, I'll even ask you nicely.

0:25:380:25:41

Look, I know you're throwing yourself into...

0:25:410:25:44

Stopping a man dying of cancer? Well, call me a maverick! Call me

0:25:440:25:47

-someone who goes the extra mile. Will you just do it?!

-Eddi?

-What?!

0:25:470:25:50

-You know that guy you just hypnotised?

-Yes.

-He's leaving...

0:25:500:25:53

-Where are you going?

-I've dropped my keys somewhere.

-Really?

0:25:540:25:57

I've forgotten something, I'm sure of it.

0:25:570:26:00

Like you forgot to get yourself checked out. Back into bed.

0:26:000:26:02

Come on.

0:26:020:26:04

MO GASPS AND GROANS

0:26:050:26:08

-Jonny Mac, what's happening?

-Right, she's in with a patient.

0:26:120:26:16

-Can you interrupt?

-I can't interrupt.

0:26:160:26:18

They had to section some kid's dad.

0:26:180:26:20

-I can't just burst in.

-Come on, dude, it's getting pretty hairy here.

0:26:200:26:24

I can't burst in! You'll have to start without her.

0:26:240:26:26

I'm telling you to start without her. That's an order.

0:26:260:26:29

It's fine, I'm fine, I'm coping. I'm just hot, really hot.

0:26:290:26:33

Take your top off, get some fresh air if you can.

0:26:330:26:36

She got you that TENS machine, remember?

0:26:360:26:38

-Listen, actually, can you interrupt?

-Sorcia Winter's office, please?

0:26:380:26:41

Thank you.

0:26:410:26:43

Just if she sees you, she can wind it up.

0:26:430:26:45

OK, I'll try. But promise me.

0:26:450:26:47

She wouldn't want you to risk anything, yeah?

0:26:470:26:49

-OK, I'll call you back.

-Errrrgh.

0:26:490:26:52

TENS doesn't work. Everyone knows that.

0:26:560:26:58

-Sorry, how many babies you had?

-How close are the contractions?

0:26:580:27:01

About every five minutes.

0:27:010:27:04

Right, are we going to do this the easy way

0:27:040:27:06

or do I have to drag you downstairs kicking and screaming?

0:27:060:27:09

Look, I know this looks mad but... I have my reasons.

0:27:090:27:11

What? You want Elliot to be your birthing partner?

0:27:110:27:14

The baby's natural mother needs to be here.

0:27:140:27:18

She's my birthing partner.

0:27:180:27:20

-What do you mean "natural"?

-I'm having this baby for a friend.

0:27:200:27:24

It's hers. I'm just...

0:27:240:27:27

I'm just carrying it.

0:27:270:27:29

So you're not going off on maternity leave?

0:27:310:27:34

-No, sorry, does that ruin your plans?

-Yeah, kinda. Why didn't you tell me?

0:27:340:27:37

Why do you need to know? AAGH!

0:27:370:27:40

-Right. Maternity, now. Come on.

-No!

0:27:400:27:42

-I promised she wouldn't miss anything!

-I don't care.

0:27:420:27:45

I don't want you splurging baby over my clean ward. Wait there!

0:27:450:27:49

-Leave that!

-It's too soon. They'll send us back.

0:27:490:27:53

-When was the last one?

-About three minutes ago.

-Get in.

0:27:530:27:56

Oh, God.

0:27:560:27:58

SHE GASPS AND GROANS

0:27:580:28:01

OK, while you scrub in, you prep patient four,

0:28:010:28:03

then when you're done on patient five,

0:28:030:28:05

you can be opening on six while I'm debriefing on three.

0:28:050:28:08

Production line, make sense? Good.

0:28:080:28:11

Hi, Nana.

0:28:130:28:14

I just wanted to say if it doesn't arrive tomorrow, it'll be Thursday.

0:28:140:28:18

I can't get into town this lunchtime and the stamps won't cover it.

0:28:180:28:20

Sorry, Nana. I know you need it for your arthritis.

0:28:200:28:24

OK, I love you to bits, best nan in the world, bye!

0:28:240:28:27

Whatever it is, put it in the out-tray in my office.

0:28:270:28:29

-I can't do that. It's stealing.

-It's not, it's compensation.

0:28:290:28:33

I could work an extra half an hour for free,

0:28:330:28:35

or I could just take one slice of pizza, or...

0:28:350:28:37

Enough already!

0:28:370:28:38

The madness has to stop.

0:28:380:28:40

Fine, get me the head of midwifery!

0:28:420:28:44

I AM the head of midwifery.

0:28:440:28:46

We're not leaving.

0:28:480:28:49

I'm sorry, I can't magic a bed out of nowhere.

0:28:490:28:51

Now, I'm sorry but I have to put my foot down.

0:28:510:28:54

I've got other ladies in here more progressed than your friend,

0:28:540:28:56

-I have to prioritise them.

-You haven't even examined her!

0:28:560:29:01

-Have your waters gone?

-No.

-If she can talk,

0:29:010:29:03

she can get to the Wyvern Birthing Centre. I'll call ahead.

0:29:030:29:06

Come on, dear, on your feet, best to keep moving.

0:29:060:29:09

No. I can't. It's planned to be here.

0:29:090:29:11

-Everyone's meeting me...here.

-WBC's lovely, you'll be fine.

0:29:110:29:14

I'm sorry but we're full to the rafters. Baby boom.

0:29:140:29:18

-Blame the recession.

-Look, I'm not being funny,

0:29:180:29:21

but you do realise that I'm a senior member of staff here?

0:29:210:29:24

If you're that important, why don't you can get an ambulance to take you and your friend?

0:29:240:29:29

-Fine! I'll just ring Mr Hanssen.

-Fine,

0:29:290:29:32

and by the time you get an appointment, your friend will be

0:29:320:29:35

at home snuggled up with baby in the comfort of her own lounge.

0:29:350:29:39

This is me calling Mr Hanssen on his personal mobile number. I'm going to get him

0:29:390:29:42

-to come down here and overrule you.

-You don't have his personal mobile.

0:29:420:29:46

PHONE RINGS

0:29:490:29:51

-Ms Naylor?

-Hello, Henrik?

0:29:510:29:53

I wonder if I could ask you to call me Mr Hanssen, please?

0:29:530:29:56

Yes... Me too... Henrik, I'm down in maternity and...

0:29:560:30:01

Fine! You win. I'll...

0:30:010:30:04

I'll make room.

0:30:040:30:06

And they're being really very helpful.

0:30:070:30:10

-Who is it?

-Er, it's Jonny.

0:30:220:30:26

-What's happened?

-Switch your phone on!

0:30:280:30:31

It's on silent when I'm with patients. Is Mo OK?

0:30:310:30:35

-It's going faster than expected.

-What?!

0:30:350:30:38

It just started happening.

0:30:380:30:39

Oh, my...! OK, I'll be 15 minutes.

0:30:390:30:43

-Can someone take over?

-No, they only trust me.

0:30:430:30:46

-Oh, no. Oh, no! Am I going to miss it?

-No, of course not.

0:30:470:30:50

Just do what you have to do but quickly.

0:30:500:30:54

HE SIGHS

0:30:570:30:58

-Sorry, no room at the inn.

-But if you had done due diligence,

0:30:590:31:02

you'd know she should've gone to obs and gynae.

0:31:020:31:04

-Obs and gynae are closed.

-They have now.

0:31:040:31:06

You'll have to get her transferred to St James's or find someone else.

0:31:060:31:10

Surely in the time it took to do this,

0:31:100:31:12

you could've done the ultrasound?

0:31:120:31:13

We don't have the kit. Anyway, I've got six more hernias to do. We're NOT picking up your slack!

0:31:130:31:17

Severe abdo pain, suspected ulcer equals a legit pass to Keller.

0:31:170:31:21

You know that, I know that.

0:31:210:31:24

Look, we're all busy.

0:31:240:31:26

So I'm asking you as a colleague. just for today.

0:31:260:31:30

No more emergency referrals. What do you say?

0:31:300:31:34

Not up to me. It's a Michael thing.

0:31:340:31:35

But he's not here and you're easily skilled to make these calls.

0:31:350:31:38

Come on, you know what Sacha's capable of, let's keep him occupied.

0:31:380:31:41

-What's in it for me?

-Well, between you and me, I need someone on Keller

0:31:430:31:47

who can really kick the place into shape.

0:31:470:31:50

Someone prepared to go the extra mile.

0:31:500:31:52

-A workaholic with no personal life?

-Perfect.

0:31:520:31:56

Look, I'm not guaranteeing anything but you know,

0:31:560:31:58

if we can demonstrate a good working relationship...

0:31:580:32:01

Fine, just for today. No more emergencies.

0:32:040:32:08

You're a life saver. I owe you.

0:32:080:32:10

Here you go - this is our training room,

0:32:120:32:14

we'll be back to check you in a bit.

0:32:140:32:17

No, no, sorry. You're not just going to leave her here?

0:32:170:32:19

-Is there any reason to think there might be complications? You're not breech, are you, dear?

-Uh-uh.

0:32:190:32:24

-Then you're fine as you are. There's the gas and air.

-No drugs.

0:32:240:32:28

-Whatever you say, dear.

-I'm sorry, has it escaped your notice that this woman is in labour?

0:32:280:32:32

Give her my birthing plan.

0:32:320:32:33

-I'll let you keep that.

-Well, what happens next?

0:32:370:32:41

-Try and help her keep her mind off it.

-With what? Canasta?

0:32:410:32:44

Did you bring a book or a jigsaw or something, dear?

0:32:440:32:47

Just hold her hand and give her the gas.

0:32:470:32:49

We'll be back to help Mum with the leg work.

0:32:490:32:51

Yes. You do remember me telling you I am a surgeon here?

0:32:510:32:54

OK, leave her on her own then.

0:32:540:32:57

-Ring Jonny, let him know I'm here.

-Fine.

0:32:570:33:01

SHE SCREAMS

0:33:010:33:04

Ugh. Right. Here, take some of this.

0:33:040:33:06

-No. Wait till the second stage.

-Wow, you really did the course!

0:33:060:33:09

If it gets bad, I'll need it then.

0:33:090:33:11

Well, it looks bad to me, Mo.

0:33:110:33:15

No, it's fine. I'm cool.

0:33:150:33:17

-Take your jacket off.

-Look as we know, I am no expert in all of this.

0:33:170:33:21

But judging by the frequency of those,

0:33:210:33:23

-I would say you're not in the first phase.

-No, if it was transition,

0:33:230:33:27

it'd be like more like... Daaarrrrgh! Jeez!

0:33:270:33:30

-Every 30 seconds. That's just great!

-Take your jacket off.

0:33:300:33:33

-No, I'm fine.

-Take your jacket off! You're making me feel hot!

0:33:330:33:36

That's good. It all looks normal.

0:33:400:33:42

-I'm so sorry.

-No, I'm sorry.

0:33:420:33:44

We didn't get you to the right department.

0:33:440:33:46

-You should have told me when you first got in. It would have saved all this hassle.

-I know.

0:33:480:33:52

It's just we're kind of in the middle of breaking up.

0:33:520:33:57

I wanted to save him the added grief, I suppose.

0:33:570:34:01

SHE GROANS

0:34:010:34:02

-You feel sick?

-Yeah, I think so. I feel awful.

0:34:020:34:06

Take that, it will give you some oxygen

0:34:060:34:08

and I'll go and speak with the doctor.

0:34:080:34:11

-Are you done?

-She needs the doctor.

-Is someone chasing her endoscopy notes?

0:34:110:34:14

-Stop hassling them, OK?

-There might be some clue in them.

0:34:140:34:17

-Let them do their jobs.

-Fine!

0:34:170:34:19

-I'll just go, shall I?

-No, of course not.

0:34:200:34:25

-Oh, ooh.

-SHE WRETCHES

0:34:250:34:28

-Can I get some help over here, please?

-It's not normal, is it?

0:34:280:34:32

She'll be OK but I do need to refer this.

0:34:320:34:34

Come on, Declan, let's give her some space. Let's go.

0:34:340:34:37

Can you just wait here for a minute?

0:34:390:34:42

-Where is Sacha?

-He's in theatre.

0:34:420:34:44

Great! Who's bright idea...?

0:34:440:34:46

It looks like my operation's been delayed.

0:34:480:34:52

Will someone find Danny and say sorry from me? I mean, personally?

0:34:520:34:57

He's put so much work into it, I feel like I'm letting him down.

0:34:570:35:01

Many thanks.

0:35:020:35:04

What are you doing?

0:35:040:35:05

I'm collecting the endoscopy fax. Try and speed things up.

0:35:050:35:08

-They're confidential notes!

-If you can't be bothered to treat her,

0:35:080:35:11

-I'm stepping in!

-You need to hand those to me!

0:35:110:35:14

What, and wait another three hours for nothing?

0:35:140:35:16

-Hand them to me, please!

-No, she paid for these!

0:35:160:35:19

-This is the wrong patient!

-Thanks for your help.

0:35:190:35:23

-PHONE RINGS

-That's her.

-Can I get it? Mo?

0:35:250:35:28

-JAC:

-'Yeah. Is that Sorcia?'

0:35:280:35:30

Yes. Are you with Mo? Tell her get to Maternity!

0:35:300:35:33

-Kinda two steps ahead of you. Where are you?

-10, 15 minutes, max.

0:35:330:35:36

You might want to get wiggle on. I think she's in transition.

0:35:360:35:39

How's the gas and air? Tell her to take whatever she needs.

0:35:390:35:42

-That's not your call.

-I know!

0:35:420:35:43

She just said she wanted my input. I'm sorry, who are you?

0:35:430:35:47

Just get here, OK?

0:35:470:35:49

Agh, agh, agh, agh, AGH!

0:35:510:35:53

OK, moron, just get some drugs in you. She's nearly here.

0:35:530:35:57

I'm not getting anything.

0:35:580:36:00

Oh, for the love of...!

0:36:010:36:03

Can we PLEASE get some help in here?

0:36:040:36:06

Shoulders! Shoulders!

0:36:060:36:08

OK, OK it's fine.

0:36:100:36:12

SHE GROANS You can do this. Keep going. You're fine. You can do this...

0:36:120:36:15

Please can we get some help! She's going Gollum on me!

0:36:150:36:20

Please! Don't leave. Please.

0:36:200:36:23

-Give those notes back to me before I call security.

-Did you know?

0:36:270:36:30

I will not discuss a patient's confidential...

0:36:300:36:33

Is a hysteroscopy another word for an abortion?

0:36:330:36:35

I can't discuss this with you.

0:36:350:36:37

-So it is an abortion?

-No.

0:36:370:36:38

It's a test to see what condition the womb is in.

0:36:390:36:43

Now give them back.

0:36:430:36:45

Right. Why do you have that? Why would you lie about it?

0:36:450:36:50

That you will have to ask Erin yourself.

0:36:500:36:52

-What is it, internal bleeding?

-What's happened?

0:36:540:36:56

-Abdomen's tender, something's going on.

-I'm taking her now.

0:36:560:36:59

-Ring Keller theatre, get them to put my hernias on hold.

-I'll do it, I'm prepped.

0:36:590:37:03

No, she was in my care. Where are her bloods?

0:37:030:37:05

We forwarded them. Why is she back from Keller?

0:37:050:37:07

Gynae is not taking anyone new and Keller's closed to emergencies.

0:37:070:37:10

Great. Another back of the envelope decision by management.

0:37:100:37:13

-Eddi did the ultrasound and it's not another miscarriage.

-What miscarriage?

0:37:130:37:17

-I'd rather do it myself.

-We can't waste any time.

-When did she have a miscarriage?

0:37:170:37:20

-Fine, do a midline laparotomy.

-I know what I'm doing. I've dealt with emergencies before.

0:37:200:37:24

Someone just tell me what's going on!

0:37:240:37:26

I can't I'm afraid. I'm due in theatre.

0:37:260:37:28

SPITS AND GROANS

0:37:310:37:34

Good swearing, excellent swearing. You OK?

0:37:340:37:38

Mmm.

0:37:380:37:39

-So was this what you signed up for?

-Not funny.

0:37:390:37:43

Well, rather you than me. Must be a good friend.

0:37:430:37:47

Legend.

0:37:470:37:49

She was our old boss when Jonny and I were on general surgery.

0:37:490:37:52

Do I know her?

0:37:520:37:54

Possibly not. She retrained in child psychiatry.

0:37:540:37:56

-Fun(!)

-After she had ovarian cancer.

0:37:560:37:59

Oh, right, I see.

0:37:590:38:02

Well. Can't say I'd do this... Ow, ow! Maureen! Fingers!

0:38:020:38:07

I am going to DIE!

0:38:070:38:10

No. You're fine, everything's fine.

0:38:100:38:13

-I'm dying Jac! I'm dying!

-Not dying, perfectly normal. OK?

0:38:130:38:20

-I'm cool, I'm fine, sorry, sorry.

-Midwife! Now!

0:38:200:38:24

-Take my mind off it. Distract me.

-Will you be watching the Olympics?

0:38:240:38:29

I've got tickets for the hockey in the last week.

0:38:290:38:34

-You didn't think you might want to rest up after this then.

-I thought I'd be on my feet in 24 hours.

0:38:340:38:38

Just hand the kid over and job done.

0:38:380:38:41

You know, back off and leave her to it.

0:38:410:38:43

Three's a crowd and all that.

0:38:430:38:45

-How are we doing?

-Did you not hear the screaming.

-It's when we don't hear screaming, that we worry.

0:38:470:38:51

Can I examine you?

0:38:510:38:54

Get yourself on the bed

0:38:540:38:56

Here we go. That's it. There we go.

0:38:560:38:59

MO GASPS AND GROANS

0:38:590:39:03

OK.

0:39:030:39:04

There we go.

0:39:060:39:08

And this is where I stop watching.

0:39:100:39:13

Open your legs for me please.

0:39:130:39:15

JAC'S PHONE RINGS They are open!

0:39:150:39:17

-No, they're closed.

-Jonny. Perfect timing.

0:39:170:39:21

Now, you might feel a bit of discomfort.

0:39:210:39:26

AGH! What are you doing, you witch?!

0:39:260:39:28

-Which way is it?

-Follow me. How's she doing Jac?

0:39:340:39:37

-Can you ask about the heartbeat? The baby's heartbeat?

-How's the baby doing?

0:39:370:39:40

-The midwife's not concerned about the baby.

-I'm not putting the baby first.

0:39:400:39:44

-I mean the midwife is not concerned about the baby.

-Of course. Sorry.

0:39:440:39:47

The baby's OK. Mo is OK. Everything is OK. Except Mo keeps screaming.

0:39:470:39:50

-Ow! Please, stop.

-Sorry dear, I have to do this.

0:39:500:39:54

Please just wait for this contracTION!

0:39:540:39:56

-SHE SCREAMS

-Goodness me, you're ten centimetres.

0:39:560:39:59

-What?!

-You're a quickie aren't you?

0:39:590:40:02

-Ten?

-Doesn't that mean you immensely mis-diagnosed her when she came in?

0:40:020:40:05

No, it just means someone's in a hurry.

0:40:050:40:07

Your waters will break naturally when baby comes out.

0:40:070:40:10

-You're ready to push.

-I'm not!

0:40:100:40:12

She's not had any pain relief? This is a joke!

0:40:120:40:15

Don't say they put the dud one in here? Well, very well done you. That was the worst bit.

0:40:150:40:19

She's been in agony!

0:40:190:40:21

Now, do you have a preferred position?

0:40:210:40:23

Let me see that birth plan, dear, please.

0:40:230:40:28

Right, so let's get you sitting up. Lovely, that's it.

0:40:280:40:32

And Sorcia, I want you to you over here because you're going to be bearing all the weight.

0:40:320:40:37

-I am NOT Sorcia.

-It's fine. I'll grip on to...

0:40:370:40:41

Oh, for goodness sake. What do you want me to do?

0:40:410:40:43

That's it so you put one hand here and the other hand up here.

0:40:430:40:47

That's it... Really firm. You grab really nice. Firm. That's lovely.

0:40:470:40:53

Lovely couple.

0:40:530:40:54

Dead segment of small bowel. Looks embolic.

0:41:010:41:05

Right, small bowel resection please, thank you.

0:41:050:41:08

Just heard from the lab and guess what she's hypercoagulable.

0:41:080:41:11

Brilliant work, lab! You tell us now, why don't you? When she's on the table.

0:41:110:41:15

They thought she was going to gynae first.

0:41:150:41:17

Fantastic. How it came to this, I just don't know.

0:41:170:41:20

That might be my fault.

0:41:200:41:22

Do you know what, I knew it I should check this out more.

0:41:220:41:24

Well. You were just trying to get the guy his biopsy, that's all.

0:41:240:41:27

And on the upside, we can have a bit of a chat whilst we work.

0:41:270:41:31

-So what's a news with you?

-Honestly, I am fine Sacha.

0:41:310:41:35

I'm just trying to focus on my work.

0:41:350:41:38

Well, be careful. You don't want to end up like Jac.

0:41:380:41:43

-I'm sorry, I'm sorry, sorry.

-It's fine. Absolutely fine.

0:41:430:41:46

-JAC WINCES

-Excellent hand crushing, Maureen. Not like I'm a surgeon or anything.

0:41:460:41:52

-Ow!

-Ow!

-Ow!

-Ow!

-Ow!

0:41:520:41:55

Here we go, hernia ten. Much like hernias one to nine.

0:41:550:42:01

You know the drill friends.

0:42:010:42:03

-Ms Campbell?

-I'm going as fast as I can.

0:42:030:42:05

Sister Williams has just called. It turns out Erin Barker's got a blood clotting problem.

0:42:050:42:09

Great(!) Tell haematology, get her some Warfarin,

0:42:090:42:12

tell Sacha I'll be down to deal with the fallout

0:42:120:42:15

as soon as I've done this.

0:42:150:42:16

It's my fault. I told obs and gynae but I didn't...

0:42:160:42:18

This is ridiculous! Why are we pushing patients between wards?!

0:42:180:42:22

-You told me to!

-It was a rhetorical question.

0:42:220:42:25

Why are we pushing them round wards, causing confusion, duplication

0:42:250:42:28

and all round cack-handedness when the system could be vastly

0:42:280:42:31

simplified if everyone just did the job they are paid to do!

0:42:310:42:34

OK, rant over.

0:42:350:42:37

Also, Mr Hanssen called, said it was important.

0:42:370:42:41

Tell him I'm on a sun lounger sipping martinis.

0:42:430:42:47

-That would be a fib.

-It would indeed.

0:42:470:42:50

I've made a complaint. I had to do something.

0:42:530:42:56

OK. Thanks for the warning. She's going to be waking up in about half an hour.

0:42:560:43:00

-Do you all think I'm a total idiot?

-No.

0:43:000:43:02

Look, she's going to be in bed for a couple of weeks so it might be

0:43:020:43:06

a really good opportunity for you guys to have a talk.

0:43:060:43:08

Yeah(!) She'll be back on the Blackberry in 24 hours. That firm has her brainwashed!

0:43:080:43:12

She told me about your break up, I'm sorry.

0:43:120:43:16

-What break up?

-Um... Er...

0:43:160:43:19

Maybe I've got the wrong end of the stick.

0:43:190:43:22

Great. This is how I hear about it. Brilliant.

0:43:220:43:27

Thanks, Erin.

0:43:270:43:28

I think next time, leave the soft stuff to the experts.

0:43:300:43:34

How are you doing?

0:43:380:43:39

Have I been in a fight?

0:43:410:43:42

No, you've had a biopsy removed from your leg.

0:43:420:43:45

-We're waiting for the results.

-Where's Lewis?

0:43:450:43:48

-Who's Lewis?

-I've left Lewis in the car!

0:43:480:43:53

Gareth, it's like 1,000 degrees outside!

0:43:530:43:55

Where are my keys?! I told you, I lost the keys.

0:43:550:43:58

I need to save Lewis! He hates the car anyway.

0:43:580:44:01

No, no, you're not going anywhere.

0:44:010:44:03

-Tell me what kind of car you've got and I'll do it!

-Silver Corsa.

0:44:030:44:06

Smashed brake lights and the passenger's side mirror,

0:44:060:44:09

you just pull that and it will just come off...

0:44:090:44:12

Right, out of the way, Sacha! Get out... Move, fatty!

0:44:120:44:16

Oh my God! What happened? Where's the fire?!

0:44:160:44:19

MO SCREAMS

0:44:230:44:24

That's it, you're doing really, really well.

0:44:240:44:27

It's perfectly normal, everything fine.

0:44:270:44:30

Can you give her an epidural or something?!

0:44:300:44:32

Way past that stage, dear.

0:44:320:44:34

-I want you to give me another really big push.

-I AM pushing!

0:44:340:44:37

-Yes, but this time I want you to really, really go for it.

-MO SCREAMS

0:44:370:44:40

Look! This woman is in agony,

0:44:400:44:42

I want you to give her 25mg intramuscular pethidine this minute!

0:44:420:44:46

She'll be fine in a minute! Now this time after three, really big push!

0:44:460:44:49

-One, two...

-I can't.

-Yes, you can!

-It's stuck!

0:44:490:44:54

-Nothing's stuck. Come on, one, two.

-This is sadism!

0:44:540:44:56

-Nope, this is crowning.

-Crowning?

0:44:560:44:58

She's only been pushing five minutes!

0:44:580:45:00

Yes, she's a very lucky lady. Come on mummy, just a couple more...

0:45:000:45:04

You can do it, this one might sting a bit. That's it.

0:45:040:45:07

-MO SCREAMS

-Yes. Got you.

0:45:070:45:10

Wait, wait, wait.

0:45:130:45:16

Hello? Someone! Please?

0:45:160:45:18

HE KNOCKS Bit of attention here!

0:45:180:45:21

We're too late. I can just tell.

0:45:210:45:22

We're not too late.

0:45:220:45:24

MO SCREAMS

0:45:240:45:26

Yes, here we go.

0:45:260:45:28

Moment of truth -

0:45:290:45:31

-it's a boy.

-BABY CRIES

0:45:310:45:32

A boy, really?

0:45:320:45:34

Is this a shock?

0:45:340:45:35

No. We just didn't want to know until this moment.

0:45:350:45:38

I think it's nicer this way -

0:45:380:45:40

Mum's privilege to be the first to know.

0:45:400:45:42

I think it's all a bit of a shock.

0:45:420:45:43

Do you want him cleaned up or straight to you?

0:45:430:45:47

Cleaned up.

0:45:470:45:48

We recommend leaving the cord.

0:45:480:45:50

Clamp the cord, she wants cleaned up.

0:45:500:45:52

We recommend skin to skin for bonding.

0:45:520:45:55

Look, just clamp the cord, clean up the baby. Mo, are you OK?

0:45:550:45:59

Yeah, just a bit, um...

0:45:590:46:01

Well done, dear.

0:46:010:46:03

Now do you want the injection for the delivery of the placenta?

0:46:030:46:05

I don't care.

0:46:050:46:06

Please, just...just get on with what happens next.

0:46:060:46:09

Whatever happens next is up to Mum.

0:46:090:46:12

BABY CONTINUES CRYING

0:46:120:46:15

Silver Corsa, broken brake light...

0:46:180:46:21

There!

0:46:210:46:23

Oh, God. Is he all right?

0:46:280:46:29

Idiot! What an idiot!

0:46:290:46:31

-No window open or anything.

-Right, move.

0:46:310:46:32

Come on, boy.

0:46:410:46:42

It's OK, it's OK. Come on boy.

0:46:420:46:44

So it's good news.

0:46:490:46:50

We removed the dead segment of bowel

0:46:500:46:53

and then joined it back up again. Do you follow?

0:46:530:46:56

Yeah, I think so. Thank you.

0:46:560:46:59

And I'm not saying we've got a eureka moment here,

0:46:590:47:02

but the coagulopathy could have contributed to the miscarriage.

0:47:020:47:06

Not a womb problem?

0:47:080:47:09

No. A blood one, treatable with drugs.

0:47:090:47:12

So I can carry a baby?

0:47:140:47:16

Well, I talked to a friend of mine in obstetrics

0:47:160:47:19

and she thought probably yes.

0:47:190:47:22

In fact, she owes me, so I'm sure I can get her to see you ASAP.

0:47:220:47:24

Oh, God...

0:47:240:47:26

However, the circumstances of your collapse

0:47:260:47:29

necessitated a discussion about your history,

0:47:290:47:32

which your partner...

0:47:320:47:34

Which he heard?

0:47:350:47:36

-SHE SIGHS

-OK.

0:47:380:47:40

I can say you're sleeping.

0:47:400:47:42

Er...

0:47:420:47:43

No, no.

0:47:430:47:46

I'll think of something.

0:47:460:47:48

I shouldn't have involved you in my ridiculous pantomime of a life

0:47:480:47:52

-in the first place.

-Don't be silly.

0:47:520:47:54

SHE SIGHS

0:47:540:47:55

Er, what do I say?

0:47:550:47:56

What's the truth?

0:47:570:47:59

I don't know.

0:47:590:48:00

I know I want a family.

0:48:010:48:03

I just...

0:48:030:48:04

I can't see myself having one with him.

0:48:050:48:08

And it just...

0:48:080:48:11

-crystallised it.

-PHONE RINGS

0:48:110:48:13

I'm sorry.

0:48:130:48:14

Um...

0:48:170:48:18

Option One. Straight talking.

0:48:180:48:22

"I've realised I want kids, just not with you.

0:48:220:48:24

"I want to split up."

0:48:240:48:25

Option Two?

0:48:260:48:28

Um...

0:48:280:48:29

"It's not you, it's me"?

0:48:300:48:31

Yeah, you might be better with Option One.

0:48:310:48:34

Look, I know it's not easy but, you know...

0:48:340:48:37

Why tell the truth when you can talk your way out?

0:48:370:48:40

Because even if you run rings around them, it can backfire.

0:48:420:48:45

Believe me.

0:48:470:48:49

I'll leave you to it.

0:48:510:48:52

Good luck.

0:48:530:48:55

Mr Usman.

0:49:030:49:06

The great man himself.

0:49:060:49:07

Honoured!

0:49:070:49:09

It's reached my ears you've been cancelled...

0:49:090:49:11

Did Danny Boyle kick off?

0:49:110:49:13

Well, he may've spoken one or two of the other porters, yes.

0:49:130:49:16

I know I'm not urgent, just...

0:49:160:49:20

Well, you work here 20 years, you hope for a few perks.

0:49:200:49:23

Of course. And it is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

0:49:230:49:25

And good publicity for the hospital.

0:49:250:49:27

Indeed. But, in this case, we must respect the clinician's call, I'm afraid.

0:49:270:49:31

I understand your disappointment.

0:49:310:49:33

I just wanted you to be in charge of the facts. Ms Campbell?

0:49:330:49:36

I am wearing my cloak of invisibility.

0:49:360:49:38

Well, fortunately, I have on my night-vision goggles

0:49:380:49:41

and I can see right through your cloak of invisibility.

0:49:410:49:43

Ten hernias down, two to go. You may walk in my wake.

0:49:430:49:47

Or even give us 20 quid for the pizza fund.

0:49:470:49:50

Can we have a word in your office, please?

0:49:500:49:52

-Oh, come on. How can

-I

-be in trouble!?

0:49:520:49:54

Is this because I didn't prioritise the PR stunt?

0:49:540:49:57

No, you failed to diagnose bowel ischaemia.

0:49:570:50:00

Right, so this is Erin Barker?

0:50:000:50:03

Why, how many other blockages have you failed to diagnose? Shall we?

0:50:030:50:06

Don't you go getting into any more trouble, Lewis.

0:50:090:50:12

Thank you.

0:50:120:50:14

Who knew you had the strength of ten men, eh?

0:50:140:50:16

I don't know.

0:50:160:50:17

Grr! The red mist just took over.

0:50:170:50:21

You don't suppose you'd be carrying any pent-up aggression?

0:50:210:50:24

Y'know, just asking.

0:50:240:50:25

No. It's just another ordinary day.

0:50:250:50:28

Full of surprises.

0:50:280:50:30

We've been waiting for ten minutes. It's outrageous!

0:50:310:50:34

I know, just that I have some ladies in here giving birth

0:50:340:50:37

and I like to put them first.

0:50:370:50:38

We're looking for Mo Effanga.

0:50:380:50:40

Ahh!

0:50:400:50:41

Well, you missed the big event. It's a little boy.

0:50:410:50:44

Congratulations.

0:50:440:50:45

A boy?

0:50:470:50:48

Is he OK?

0:50:500:50:52

Oh, yes. Mother and son snuggled up nicely.

0:50:520:50:55

Piece of cake it was.

0:50:550:50:56

Do you want a look?

0:50:590:51:00

I don't know.

0:51:000:51:01

Well, I think you should at least hold him.

0:51:050:51:07

I don't want to.

0:51:080:51:09

I don't want to get attached.

0:51:110:51:13

Jac, you've met me, right?

0:51:130:51:16

I'm a soft-hearted cow at the best of times. I can't risk it.

0:51:160:51:19

Which begs the question - why did you agree to this?

0:51:200:51:23

Because I'm a soft-hearted cow.

0:51:230:51:25

I just want to hand him over and move on.

0:51:270:51:29

Look, I'm not being heavy but a baby knows when it's being rejected.

0:51:290:51:32

-All the literature...

-He's not being rejected.

0:51:320:51:34

Trust me, they know. It's neurological.

0:51:340:51:38

My mum walked out of the hospital and just left me there...

0:51:380:51:42

And you turned out all right.

0:51:420:51:44

My point exactly.

0:51:450:51:46

He's not my baby.

0:51:460:51:48

It's not that I don't love him, I just...

0:51:490:51:51

If it's any consolation, he seriously looks nothing like you.

0:51:510:51:54

Please. Just cuddle him till she comes.

0:51:590:52:01

I just don't want to have to say hello and then goodbye.

0:52:020:52:05

OK, if you're sure.

0:52:050:52:08

Hello, you.

0:52:100:52:12

Look, seriously, just have one go. In case you regret it.

0:52:170:52:22

Please, Mo, don't throw away a chance you might not get again.

0:52:220:52:26

No. Sorcia's getting...

0:52:260:52:28

Sorcia's getting everything.

0:52:280:52:30

Just do this for yourself.

0:52:310:52:33

She wasn't presenting in pain or with any contraindications,

0:52:350:52:39

we had an unachievable list - which we've almost achieved -

0:52:390:52:42

and you told me to run my ward MY way,

0:52:420:52:44

so I took the executive decision to close to non-electives.

0:52:440:52:47

You did what?

0:52:470:52:49

Oh. That isn't what this is about?

0:52:490:52:52

You closed the ward to non-electives?

0:52:520:52:54

Yes.

0:52:540:52:55

Right and how did that little scheme pan out?

0:52:550:52:58

Well, we will hit our targets

0:52:580:53:00

and patients downstairs were seen more efficiently.

0:53:000:53:03

I won't deny some unintended consequences

0:53:030:53:06

caused by early-stage confusion.

0:53:060:53:10

-Of course.

-It's because we move people around so much that communication errors occur -

0:53:100:53:13

that much became clear.

0:53:130:53:15

Validating my initial instinct.

0:53:150:53:18

That's interesting. Perhaps we should trial it for a longer period.

0:53:180:53:21

Well, it'd certainly improve my throughput...

0:53:210:53:23

And AAU will concur will they?

0:53:230:53:24

Of course.

0:53:240:53:26

You're just annoyed you didn't think of it yourself!

0:53:260:53:29

He's not even at the puking stage.

0:53:310:53:33

OK.

0:53:370:53:39

Thank you, Jac.

0:53:390:53:41

KNOCK ON DOOR

0:53:410:53:42

Mo, are you decent?

0:53:420:53:44

Oh, my God! Come in!

0:53:440:53:45

-Oh, my God!

-Oh, my God!

0:53:470:53:49

Oh, my God, is that...?

0:53:490:53:51

Yeah! That's him! Take him!

0:53:510:53:53

Oh, my good...!

0:53:580:54:00

Oh, my...!

0:54:000:54:02

What colour are his eyes?

0:54:020:54:04

We don't know. He hasn't opened them.

0:54:050:54:07

-Really?

-See?

0:54:070:54:09

You're the first thing he's going to see.

0:54:090:54:11

Everything's going to be OK.

0:54:110:54:13

-SOBBING:

-Hello. Hello, little baby.

0:54:130:54:15

Oh, don't, you'll set us all off!

0:54:150:54:19

Mo, I cannot tell you... Thank you. Thank you so much.

0:54:190:54:22

Forget it. It was worth it.

0:54:220:54:24

I'm so sorry. Was it awful?

0:54:240:54:26

-Well, it wasn't...

-She had no pain relief.

0:54:260:54:29

My waters didn't break. So we just thought it was early labour.

0:54:290:54:32

You are officially a living legend.

0:54:320:54:34

And extremely screwed when the endorphins wear off.

0:54:340:54:38

SHE SIGHS

0:54:590:55:01

Glass?

0:55:180:55:19

I think I'll head off. My work here is done.

0:55:190:55:22

Jac, thank you.

0:55:220:55:24

Well, I've had less surreal experiences but you're welcome.

0:55:240:55:27

Right, too many people in here. Mum needs to rest

0:55:280:55:30

That's my cue.

0:55:300:55:32

You're welcome, dear.

0:55:330:55:34

Right, I just need to take him for a once-over with the paediatrician.

0:55:370:55:41

Paeds? Why, is something wrong?

0:55:410:55:43

No, it's just a check-up.

0:55:430:55:45

So do I have mum's permission to whisk him away for a bit?

0:55:450:55:49

Sorcia's the baby's mother.

0:55:490:55:51

Yes, but I need YOUR permission. You gave birth to him.

0:55:530:55:56

Yeah, of course.

0:55:590:56:00

Can I come with you?

0:56:010:56:03

Is Mum happy with that?

0:56:030:56:06

Yeah.

0:56:060:56:07

She'll be fine.

0:56:230:56:24

Yeah.

0:56:250:56:27

You OK? Want to talk about it?

0:56:270:56:30

Big day and all that.

0:56:300:56:32

No.

0:56:330:56:35

I think she's got a can of gin and tonic in her bag.

0:56:360:56:38

Actually, you know what? I'd quite like to be on my own.

0:56:380:56:42

Done.

0:56:590:57:00

Ah! Shall I order pizza?

0:57:000:57:02

Yes, we have completed the 12 electives

0:57:020:57:05

and narrowly missed a fine from the regulator.

0:57:050:57:07

However, there is one more hernia left to do.

0:57:070:57:11

Mr Usman.

0:57:110:57:12

I thought you said he was on someone else's list?

0:57:120:57:15

He is, but sometimes you do just have to suck up the dross no-one else can do.

0:57:150:57:20

Good news, Mr Usman - we're going to get you to that ceremony.

0:57:200:57:25

After two false starts, on your marks, get set...

0:57:250:57:28

Someone call Danny!

0:57:280:57:30

HE CHUCKLES

0:57:300:57:32

KNOCK ON DOOR

0:57:340:57:35

How are we doing?

0:57:370:57:38

Have the painkillers kicked in yet?

0:57:390:57:41

How's the baby?

0:57:410:57:43

-Has nobody been in?

-No.

0:57:430:57:44

I'm sorry, dear. Yes, he's doing really well.

0:57:440:57:47

The paediatrician's signed him off,

0:57:480:57:50

so he can go home with his other mummy.

0:57:500:57:52

Oh, right.

0:57:530:57:54

Have you been for a walk yet?

0:57:570:57:58

I just want to lie here.

0:57:580:58:00

It's best to get on your feet, dear. The sooner the better.

0:58:010:58:04

In a few days' time, this will all seem like a bad dream.

0:58:130:58:17

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