The Looking Glass Holby City

I know that we haven't had the most...conventional of starts

-but there is something there.

-I'm not saying there isn't...

What's the harm in seeing where it goes?

'This seriously cool Austin Healey.'

-71.

-75.

Have you lost your mind?

I wish this could have happened differently.

You knew what the Herzig meant to me.

It shouldn't have been you who took this from me.

Hee-hee! See?

I told you it was worth it.

She's an absolute beaut.

Not unlike yourself.

RADIO ON: "You And Me Song" by The Wannadies

Hey! That's our song!

See? It's fate.

75 grand's worth of fate.

Come on. You love it really.

Don't you? Hmm?

# You and me always... #

Raf...

-# And for ever, you... #

-Raf! Look out!

TYRES SQUEAL

Damn it!

RADIO OFF

TRIES IGNITION

-Good morning.

-Yes. Morning.

CHAIR SQUEAKS

I took the liberty of getting new chairs.

Better posture, better performance.

I thought it might take the strain off your back.

SQUEAKING

I see.

Got my back have you, Jac?

I had my old chair for years...

I was perfectly happy with it.

Change is the prelude to progress, Elliot. Get used to it.

Wh...What...?

Professor Elliot Hope?

Wha...

All right, OK...

I presume the other night was the practice run...

Sorry?

With lover boy. In training for me.

Two words, Harry. Pole. Barge.

Had we but world enough, and time...

You what?

You. Playing coy...

But, seriously. Wasn't it weird going back there

with Fletch after all these years?

You can't remember what happened, can you?

Yes.

-Got yourself a bit of prime parking there, mate.

-Yeah, yeah. Move along.

Nothing to see here.

That is the result of somebody like that being

put behind the wheel of something so exquisite.

Like some kind of sick social experiment...

Democracy, eh?

You all right?

Amy?

What's up?

Just being silly. It's the shock, that's all.

And obviously...

C'mon. Let's get you checked out.

Little secret for you.

I failed my driving test five times. Ha!

So...all present and correct.

You've got a perfectly healthy baby.

Thank God!

Blood pressure is slightly raised

but there's really nothing for you to worry about. Just try and keep those stress levels down.

No more rally driving, you hear?

Oh, God, I'm so relieved...

I know we're not quite at 20 weeks, but...

as it's you two. If you'd like to know the baby's sex...

-Yes!

-Oh, no, no...

-Well, we don't have to...

-We can if you want...

Well, if you haven't discussed it...

-No, no - we did.

-Did we?

Sorry, just getting carried away.

Oh, it's all right.

Most people want a surprise, but when it comes down to it,

can't actually help themselves.

Raf. I commend you. You're a man of great self-discipline...

-No, let's do it.

-No, Raf, honestly...

No, no, no. Let's find out.

-You sure?

-Yeah.

OK. You two are going to be the proud parents of...

-..a baby boy.

-A boy!

Raf, you always wanted a boy!

I would've been happy with whatever I got, but...

A boy?

A son...

Frothing at the mouth is not a symptom I've ever seen.

In reality though, when you think about it,

we don't even have an explanation for the biggest mystery there is -

existence. I mean, sure,

the Big Bang Theory, the theory of everything...

Eh?

But at the end of the day, it's all just speculation...

The frothing at the mouth, Mr Koenig?

-Louis, please.

-The frothing at the mouth.

Before I have you evicted from this hospital for trespassing and time wasting!

Toothpaste.

Why?

I just needed to see you, Professor.

You're my last hope.

Louis?

Pectus excavatum...

I've done my research.

I know you used to perform the Nuss procedure.

I want it.

It's a breathtaking operation.

Fashion a metal arch, insert it in the chest,

flip it over and watch as the chest rises.

-Wow...

-Proper metalwork, that.

Mr Koenig?

Nice shoes.

Buzz Lightyear. Back again?

Kate and Wills, just the pair I need...

Ah. The couple that throw themselves in front of sports cars. What've we got?

Kitty Flyte. Alistair Rockwell.

Lacerations and suspected fractured ribs for her.

Suspected fractured knee for him. And you're going to love how they did it.

-Falling off a bed?!

-That's how we roll...

Joker. He fell, dragged me with him.

-As per usual.

-OK, lovebirds.

Well, if you can bear to be separate for just a second,

can we get them on separate trolleys, please?

And this idiot's lost the key!

OK, well, let's get those off...

Look, Serena's going to be off sick again.

It's going to be a busy one...

Why don't you just go home, rest up?

I'm fine now! We should be together today.

Celebrating.

OK. Your choice.

Louis has come to see me several times

and every time, I've said no. We won't get CCG funding.

Jac, we can do the procedure without that.

I'm not running a charity, Elliot.

It's an expensive, essentially cosmetic surgery...

Um, self-image can be as important as medical health.

Sage input as always from Holby's Next Top Model...

The last time I looked, we weren't on Harley Street.

Unless there is a medical need, it's a no from me.

You know, historically speaking, dictatorships don't tend to go down too well...

And you can rely on the underclasses for objectivity on that point.

Ms Naylor. Maggie O'Dowd...

Maggie?! She's an old patient of mine.

Yeah, she's here for the Herzig. I thought you might like to scrub in.

Hell, yeah!

Jac, do you really think the Herzig is suitable?

Her atrial wall is very weak. She'll likely bleed out.

I can handle it, Elliot.

In the meantime, discharge Hubble junior over there

before I break it to him not so gently.

She's obviously having trouble filling the boss's shoes.

Never imagined I'd be an unwanted guest in my own home.

I could have a word with her if you like, Elliot...

No. No need to compound this humiliation.

Right. Let's go and talk to the little man.

Er, she did say unless there's a MEDICAL need...

Really?

I quite like that.

-Um...Fletch.

-Yes?

Can I just have a quick word?

Well, it's going to have to wait.

I've got some conscious uncoupling to do.

Whereas I always think the opposite's more fun.

Yeah, that's unconscious coupling, FYI...

Yeah, that's not looking too bad.

You were meant to cuff me to the bed, not to you, dummy! Not the game...

Can't let you loose, can I? So much for a special weekend...

For the pain. So... Was this a honeymoon, or...?

We're not married!

Practically. Been together since we were 15.

Childhood sweethearts, eh!

Well, you're with the original Romeo and Juliet with these two.

You guys? How long?

Since we were 18.

Wow...

And...it's your first?

Do you mind if I...? If we...?

Boy or girl?

Actually, we just found out today we're having a little boy.

-Oh, congratulations!

-You got a name?

No, we haven't thought about it yet.

There you go, you are free...

Finally.

Let's get you both X-rayed.

In their own little cocoon.

It's chaos in here today.

-Could you do me a favour and take them to X-ray?

-Sure.

All done. Fully hydrated.

Now...

Don't say I don't look after you, wild child.

Your wild child now.

You'd think I'd have learnt to drink responsibly by now.

What, you mean now that you're 40, and all?

How do you know..?

Drunken call at one in the morning ring any bells?

I drunk dialled you?!

Oh, I haven't done that since I was a teenager! What did I say?

You were very...sweet.

So come on, why didn't you tell me it was your birthday?

Had enough of an existential crisis this year,

without harping on about being 40.

Well, at least now...

you can wake me up in person.

No!

How did Mama Levy take it?

Well, she looked like I was leaving her for deepest darkest Africa,

you know, not a semi down the road.

To new beginnings.

I'm sorry. Just... I wonder if you can help me.

I've lost my bag you see, and...

Oop, OK. There we go.

You OK?

Oh, well. I'm shrinking again.

If his X-ray's OK, are we going to be discharged quickly?

Hopefully...

I'm meant to be catching a flight in like, four hours...

You guys are going on holiday?

I'm going to California for a bit. To study.

Philosophy PhD.

And, Alistair's coming along for the ride?

Uh, no.

It's just for three months initially, so...

Obviously Ali's making out like it's for ever.

Well, three months is quite a long time...

He can't hack long-haul flights anyway, so...

I worked all over the world with Raf, so we could be together.

Wow. I dunno, I just...

don't want to sacrifice things that are important to me.

Relationships are about sacrifice, surely.

Well... Clearly, it worked out for you guys...

How...much...longer?

I'm Jewish. Sport's not really my thing.

You're into swimming, though.

Swimming's the worst.

-I thought...

-Everyone in my year was going to the pool in the park,

to sunbathe and stuff. And...

Was there a girl there?

Totally futile anyway. She'll never fancy me with a chest like this.

Only dates rugby boys these days.

Hey, well then, she's not good enough for you...

I don't care if she's not good enough! I can't spend my whole life pre-first base.

Have you never been kissed?

Right...

It's OK to still be wearing your V plates. Isn't it, Elliot?

I think that's probably enough time...

Louis?!

Shalom, Dad.

Sorry!

I suddenly go all tiny...

Like Alice in Wonderland.

Alice Munro.

Referred from the ED with severe abdominal pain and nausea.

Do you mind if I...?

It's fine. It always happens.

Just... I never used to get this sick...

-Is there anyone we can call for you?

-Nope.

Anyway. My work's better, when I'm...

in Wonderland...

I see all sorts of things...

What about my bag?

The green giant had it downstairs.

It's got my magic powder in, you see.

Um, we'll be right back.

OK, the usual tests.

A CT scan of the abdomen, MRI and EEG to rule out brain tumour.

And a...tox screen.

Obviously.

What do you reckon - LSD? MDMA?

Oh, I don't know. You tell me, you crazy wild child, you.

-Ooh!

-For our information, are you two...?

Yes, Dr March. Yes. We are in fact, um, back on...

J'adore that.

-Now look, it's Essie's birthday...

-How old?

40.

And I want to organise a surprise party...

I'm your man...

Excellent. Thank you very much.

Sycophant...

How could you forget you put it in your sock?!

Other than a rogue key,

there is nothing in the X-ray that concerns us.

-So we can go?

-Are you sure?

Still not feeling pretty.

Any pain should be muscle or ligament trauma,

essentially a bad sprain. We'll bandage you up and...

The anti-inflammatory should be kicking in.

-What're you doing, Kit?

-Checking the plane tickets...

-Can you just... Give me that...

-I can still make it...

-Kit!

Fine.

Not QUITE how I planned on doing this, but...

Don't go.

I don't want you to go.

Marry me.

That is so romantic.

You are unbelievable.

Ali?!

It's OK. It's just a faint. It's probably the pain. Come on.

Deep breaths. Pulse is high.

Let's get him into bed.

Can you push fluids, order gases, clotting,

and chase those blood result for me?

Did you give him enough pain relief?

I can do my job, Raf.

Look, let's just try and focus, OK?

Get to the bottom of this.

But why would you go in the pool? You can't swim!

-Louis?

-I fell in, OK? Chillax, old man.

What's the deal here? Has he swallowed a lot of water?

Mr Koenig. Louis isn't here because he fell in the pool...

Oh, no. No - no, no, no.

We've been over this before.

Here we go...

They could shunt that metal thing

straight through your heart, Louis, straight through!

For THIS? It's immaterial.

It's familial?

Has it affected me?

Look at what I've achieved.

You'll understand this, Professor. Theoretical physicist.

Published numerous papers on cosmos theory.

That is very impressive, Mr Koenig, but...

You're looking at the next Hawking here, right in front of you...

See what I'm dealing with?

You have a brilliant mind, Louis.

Uh, Yiddish Kop.

The brains!

Right, where's that woman we saw before? Ginger?

Mr Koenig. Charmed, I'm sure.

Let me put you all out of your misery.

Louis, as previously discerned, there is no medical need

for you to have this surgery, therefore you won't be having it.

Right, then.

I'll go pull the car around and maybe

we could catch that lecture on Minkowski and spacetime.

Louis, I'm so sorry...

May as well be celibate.

-Jac. Surely there's some way...

-You went behind my back.

Well, there may have been a medical reason.

But there isn't. I can't justify the cost.

I'm sorry, Elliot.

Yes, well...

-Do you think they have sex?

-Oh! I don't want to think about that.

I think it's quite sweet, actually.

What? Oh, c'mon, guys.

Levy gets laid, we all get an easy life.

There you go.

I can't have those!

It'll help with your nausea.

But I can't swallow them. They won't fit in my tiny mouth.

They're huge!

Alice, your MRI and EEG have come back clear,

which is fantastic news.

But, nevertheless,

we do need to find out why you're having these hallucinations.

If you can just tell us what you've taken...

I haven't TAKEN anything...

The green giant!

MOBILE RINGS

+49?

Oh, yeah - must be some outsourced cold-calling place.

-Alice's bag.

-Very good.

And, er...

Yeah. Going to take that, I think.

We just need to get this tested.

Everything...OK?

Yeah. Yeah. Fine.

-I'm going to take this to the lab.

-OK.

How long have you been there?

I just... You looked sad, and...

Come on, let's get you back in bed.

What, ho! Apothecary!

Shakespeare for you, there.

Seems a bit tense in there.

Patient faints, assumed cause is pain,

but I'm certain he's had adequate pain relief.

Anyway...

Oh, uh, yes. Sorry.

They're out upstairs.

I'm really glad you came to see me today.

And I'm sorry if I put my foot in it with Raf...

Not at all. He's had a lot on his mind lately.

-Miss Campbell's been off...

-Mm. Poor guy. Seems pretty...

shell-shocked by the whole thing.

Last thing he needs is me bleating on about the baby.

Even so, I thought you seemed... withdrawn.

It's important, you know, keeping that blood pressure down and...

I understand it's a tricky situation, isn't it?

But if you ever want to talk, then...

Here you go.

Tell your ward sister to stock up next time.

Save you the trip all the way down here.

Right, well, er... I'll leave you to it, then.

If you can put up with the rabble, we'd love to have you.

-Thank you!

-Oh, my gosh - it's all kicking off out there!

-Buzz Lightyear senior has lost Lightyear junior.

-Louis?

Thing is, I didn't want to say anything,

but I've just had a quick break with Janelle from Paeds and she's always

banging on about wanting to meet a guy with intellect and

broadening her horizons, yada, yada, yada.

-Where is...

-Well, our Janelle is a lady with a lot of experience

under her belt, if you know what I'm saying.

-Massive FOMO.

-FO... I'm sorry?

A Fear Of Missing Out, I believe.

Yeah. She likes to try everything.

-Adele...

-I thought... Match made, isn't it?

-Where is Louis?

Yeah, no, that's cool. Um, so, Janelle.

Are you more of a Styles or a Zayn girl?

Styles.

Louis! What are you doing here? I've been looking for you everywhere.

Had to get away from Darth Bloody Vader.

He's worried about you.

I know he thinks it's all so trivial - looks, and girls, but...

Ed White. The astronaut that did the first American spacewalk.

He said when he had to come back in to Earth,

it was the saddest moment of his life...

That's how I feel, every day.

When I wake up and look in the mirror.

Louis, I'm truly sorry I can't help you.

I'm just so fed up of being pushed around

and overlooked my entire life.

My chair! That's my chair.

They've chucked...

Follow me.

I gave Alistair Rockwell adequate pain relief, Raf.

That's not why his blood pressure dropped.

-I chased his bloods...

-Thank you, Doctor...

And ordered an INR.

Kitty said he can't do long flights.

He's on Warfarin for recurring DVT.

Well, I need that CT scan, urgently.

I did tell you I wasn't on drugs.

No-one ever believes me... That's why I stopped coming to doctors.

So why did you grind up paracetamol?

Because I can't fit them in my mouth.

And the paracetamol makes me normal again...

It takes away the hallucinations?

But you haven't got a headache?

Any eyesight problems?

No history of epilepsy or...?

Just thinking chromosomal disorders can cause delusions.

-History of Huntington's chorea?

-Nope. I told you,

I've had this since I was a child.

No-one can work it out.

Maybe I just am different, like Alice...

I drew something for you...

Well... That's very sweet, but it's not fair.

I mean, you know, if you're going to expose me, what about this one here?

-Ah! Come on. I want to see that.

-Please!

I...saw you before.

You're lost. It's making you sad.

Well, Alice. Don't worry.

We're going to get to the bottom of this. OK?

Well, whatever's going on in her head,

she still has some semblance of reality.

She got YOU wrong, though...

+49 on your phone have something to do with it?

Internal bleeding? I fell out of a bed!

The Warfarin prevents your blood from clotting,

so even the smallest knock can be a problem.

We'll give you a drug called Sanplex to try and get you clotting again.

Otherwise, I'm afraid, we may need to operate.

Surgery?

And it's nil by mouth from now.

Please don't tell her.

You'll want someone with you...

Hey, fainty man. You're awake.

I stirred in the chocolate.

So, once his knee's strapped up, is he going to be discharged?

Well, we'll see...

I mean, I can stay...

For how long, Kits? Another hour?

Another day?

Ten years. I just don't understand

why you'd move to the other side of the world...

It's three months!

What are you still searching for?

You see, for me, it's easy. I want to be with you.

I've always known that.

Yet you chose now? To ask me.

In a hospital, when I'm about to go away.

I don't want to lose you...

Really(?)

Actually. Actually, go...

If that's what you want, let's just call it a day.

What?!

I am, I am fed up of the chaos of you.

The constant free fall...

Trying to lock you down...

Kitty, wait...

Amy...

-She doesn't know what's going on...

-Patient confidentiality!

What does that mean? After all that time, together.

You don't just run away, Raf.

Kitty!

Jac.

So yesterday, your daughter said her first words.

Can you show me Mrs O'Dowd's scans as soon as they're back?

-Which, incidentally, you might have heard if you just...

-Jonny, I'm busy.

I e-mailed you the video, so...

Louis!

Have you been smoking?!

Let's go.

Actually, Mr Koenig, there's been a slight change of plan.

So what's going on? You can talk to me, you know.

Er, two cappuccinos. Thank you.

+49 is the country code for Germany.

I have a great uncle in Munich.

So, Josef had a brother, did he?

Yeah. Found out when they matched his DNA.

To check if he really was... Well, Josef Dalke.

Did his brother know about..?

No.

Franz is much younger and they only found out what Josef did

after the war and, even then, they thought he'd died...

Until a couple of months ago...

He's been e-mailing me every week.

I've ignored it.

But, um...

..it seems you weren't the only one I drunk-dialled last night.

I'm so sorry...

The family want to meet me.

For me to go and stay with them for a bit.

Wow.

How do you feel about that?

I don't know. I'm 40.

I'm tired of playing Who Do You Think You Are...

And crazy is wrong.

And I'm not sad any more.

I'm the happiest I've been for a very long time.

Good.

Kitty!

You're still here.

Alistair would want you to stay.

Taxi's on its way, so...

It's not that I don't love him. It's just...

Marriage is for ever, and we've only ever been with each other.

How are you meant to know?

I think you'd know...

I was taught that if something's right, you fight for it. Together.

And I suppose your relationship's perfect as a result?

Raf hasn't even thought about baby names...

Nothing is perfect, Kitty...

Ali cheated on me.

We had an argument.

Kitty...

Someone cheating.

Can you really get past that?

We need to consider Louis' emotional need, Mr Koenig...

Emotional need? Emotional need?!

I'm his FATHER!

Look, Louis - listen to me.

If you just get to university, full of like-minded astrophysicists, hm?

It was the making of me...

I'm not you. I actually want to get laid.

Laid? Laid?! What is laid?

Having sex.

Yes. Thank you, Adele.

Girls are a distraction.

You think Luke Skywalker would've faced the Emperor

if there was still a girl in the frame?

-You think Einstein...

-Can you quit it with all the cosmos rubbish?

-Louis!

-Please! None of it's real...

-Louis!

It's a crucially important framework to explain...

Explain what?!

Louis...

Explain why we're freaks.

Explain why Mum went off with the body builder next door?

Why she just...left us.

You're a loser. That's why.

Are you the head of this Mickey Mouse department?

Mr Koenig...

Are you?

No, I'm not.

I had a clear-out recently, after...everything.

Anyway, I was going to take all of this to the creche.

Aha!

This was my favourite book when I was a kid.

Right, OK, let's get through it.

What happens in the story?

Er, she falls down the rabbit hole...

She shrinks, she grows...

Great. Well, they're the symptoms...

Where does it all start?

It's all a dream. It's all in her head...

So headaches can cause delusions.

The paracetamol helps our Alice...

No. She said she didn't have headaches.

She just gets sick...

It's abdominal migraine!

When a migraine is so severe, the pain is sublimated.

You don't feel it in the head, but in the abdomen...

Abdomen...

You're a genius.

You are.

No you're...you're the genius.

Ah! Damn it!

Figured you'd be with your baby.

No point leaving it to someone else, to mess things up.

Your brother gave us this.

That was nice of him.

I've been looking through it every day. Underlining names.

For girls, anyway.

Why won't this...

I thought... If it's a boy, you'd know.

We always said Callum, remember?

Amy! Sorry... Just, this is really tricky.

Jac.

Maggie O'Dowd's scans.

You don't think Elliot's got a point, do you?

If I needed someone to second-guess me... Oh, wait! I don't.

It's just her atrial cuff is so calcified.

-It might be a bit complicated...

-Looks pretty simple to me.

There's two kinds of people in this world, Mo - winners and losers.

-All I'm saying...

-If you want to be a surgeon or not, it's up to you...

You know...

Mr Koenig. You're still here.

Your hair tone, in fact...

-Are you all right?

-I'm bleeding.

-How much?

-Enough.

PAGER BEEPS

Raf...

I don't know...

Do you think we should try and see Mr Thompson?

Yeah. Yes. Yeah, we should...

Have you seen Raf? Mr Di Lucca, have you seen him anywhere?

Has anyone seen Raf anywhere?!

What?!

It's Alistair Rockwell. He's crashing.

You go and see Mr Thompson and I'll be right with you.

-Raf...

-I'll be right there.

What are you doing? Can't you see that clashes?!

Tasteless little mole.

Aren't you taking this all a bit too seriously?

Organising a great party is a very serious affair, OK?

We can hardly leave it to Abigail over there.

More cheese and pineapple, Sue?

What would you say if I told you we've found out what you've

been suffering with, all these years?

I wouldn't believe you.

Well. The TMS test... CRASH

..we ran on your head shows areas of excitability in your brain.

You have in fact been suffering from migraines, which is

why the paracetamol helped you so much.

They're just so severe that the pain manifests in your stomach,

as abdominal migraine. And when the pain is that bad,

it can cause neurological side effects.

Alice, you have been suffering from a very rare syndrome called

-Todd's Syndrome.

-Todd's Syndrome?

Yes. Sufferers experience hallucinations.

You know, a distorted perception of themselves and the world.

Lilliputianism, macropsia...

Er, when people and objects appear too big or too small.

Oh, my God - I have all of those.

The funny thing is, Todd's Syndrome is also known as...

Alice in Wonderland Syndrome.

So, you sort of have been Alice all this time.

Luckily, your Alice symptoms can be cured with an anti-epileptic drug

called Lamotrigine.

No more shrinking. You'll go back to normal.

Normal...

Whoa! You're on Team Gingersnap. You can't just cross into rebel camp.

Give it a rest, Jonny Mac.

Been playing slap-me-down with Stalin all day.

Hey, how about you treat yourself to a nice coffee from Pulse's?

Because I can get one for free here.

Or... what about one of those long biscuit thingies...

-Ooh! Biscotti. Mm.

-Yeah, mmm.

Does anybody actually eat those?

-I would eat...I would eat a Biscotti.

-Sometimes.

You haven't said, "I told you so" re Sun Tzu out there

and the last time you were this nice to me, you wanted two grand.

Wagwan?

-Hi.

-No, no, no.

-Spoons.

-Right.

-The Nuss procedure! You're going ahead with it?

I am.

And does her highness know?

Um...

I see.

So, how's it work?

Col, do you feel like getting a drink later?

Er...actually, about the other night.

That was good, weren't it?

Fletch... Did we...?

Your mattress, is that memory foam?

Uh...

It's just that it got me thinking. You know.

Maybe I should get one of them for myself.

Right, so you slept on it. Did you?

Did you sleep well on it?

Never better. But, er...

maybe next time.

Um, Facilities called again. They really need you to move your car.

I'm a massive idiot.

-Kitty...

-What? What's happened?

-Now isn't a good time.

-Where is he? Please?

Wait there.

I can't see a thing - more suction, please.

It's no good, he's bleeding out.

Right. We're going to have to shock him.

Charging.

Raf? Kitty, you can't go in there!

What's happening?!

-What the hell is she...?! Someone get her out of here!

-Kitty...

He was fine!

Amy, can you get her out of here? Now!

-Kitty, come on.

-Please! Do something...

Colette!

Are you OK?

You could get arrested for that!

I just left...

He's not going to die, is he?

Come on - let's get you up. Come on.

It's always been the two of us.

I-I can't lose him.

Can you tell Raf...I've gone.

Alice!

No, it's Emelia. My real name's Emelia, not Alice.

I changed it when my...

Calm down. Calm down.

Calm down.

It was when my mum died.

I used to wake up really early

and I'd look through my window, and see all these animals in our garden.

But they weren't like, normal - they were so close to me,

and vivid.

And they used to talk to me, when I was sad.

Sometimes, when someone close to us dies

it's easy to lose sense of yourself.

Of reality.

You're rootless, too.

Well, at least you've now been diagnosed

and you can stop letting this condition determine who you are.

It IS who I am.

It's how I see things.

If I can't be Alice,

who in the world am I?

She's had ondanestron. She shouldn't be sick.

Let's chase up those outstanding tests.

You're going to be proper hot stuff.

What part of "no" do you not understand?

Louis, please...

There is a strong psychological argument, Miss Naylor...

-It could kill you!

-You kill me.

It's a cosmetic procedure, Elliot.

I had hoped I'd taught you better than to be so black and white.

Taught me? So that's what this little rebellion is all about?

I'm begging you. You're all I've got.

Dad, listen to me!

-Oh, Louis, please!

-LISTEN to me.

You know how when you're in space, you're weightless...

-Yeah, zero-G.

-Right.

Well, when I was under the water, earlier,

that's how I felt, and I just thought...

If I could just stay down here, never come back up,

never have to face anyone again...

-What?

-I didn't fall into the pool, Dad.

I jumped.

I really need this operation.

Code ginger, code ginger. Naylor's on the war path! Oh...

Ms Effanga. We'll be operating on the Herzig patient shortly.

Can you scrub up, please?

Mr Self is aware of what's going on.

After all these years together, Jac, has it really come to this?

The operation can't go ahead.

So be it.

Excuse me, mind your feet.

Elliot...

This is a dangerous game.

There will be serious ramifications for everyone involved.

Is this the first time that you've bled?

It might be nothing.

I just need to establish the facts, that's all.

Yes. It's the first time.

That bloody car!

I can't...

I couldn't...

If I've lost my baby boy...

You shouldn't be alone for this, Amy.

Where is Raf?

So, um.

I just wanted to say that, um, I really,

I mean REALLY enjoyed the other night.

I mean, you've still got all the old moves, Col...

Really? Do I?

Yeah...

Do you know what, you've picked up a couple of really good new ones...

-Hee-hee!

-Ha-ha!

What the...?

Is that a memory foam?!

Nice one, mate!

Oh, ha-ha. That is really funny, you pair of numpties.

So, we didn't...?

No. We didn't.

You did your usual "drink too much, fall asleep on me in the cab and dribble over my suit".

That was the closest I got to any action.

Good. Because you know it would have been a massive mistake.

I love you, Col.

But the thought of you romantically terrifies me.

Even 20 years ago, you were a total ball-breaker.

But, um, but you can keep the flowers.

Because I confiscated those just for you.

Just so you know, though -

unlike Fletch, I can handle a strong woman.

Bit of a tussle.

Just FYI.

God help whoever falls for that.

Amy!

How did you get on?

I am so sorry.

You're OK?

We haven't lost it?

It?

This is your son, Raf!

He's your son.

Yeah.

All right.

Ready?

Mm-hm.

Elliot?

Right.

One, two...

three.

I'm afraid he's lost a lot of blood.

-I need to prepare you for the worst...

-No.

You don't know him.

-Look, we can give it some time, but...

-He loves life.

He'll wake up.

Maybe Kitty should step outside for a minute?

Come on, Kitty. Let's go get a cup of coffee, yeah?

I'm sorry. About what I said, earlier, to you...

You were right. You fight for it, don't you?

Grr!

Amy? What are you doing? It's raining.

You always fight for everything that's important to YOU.

Your blood pressure. You need to calm down.

Your patients. Your career.

I've tried to fix it already.

-This bloody car!

-It's too damaged.

WE'RE too damaged, Raf.

What?

All I ever wanted was a baby.

Yeah, I know.

Today, I nearly lost him. And you weren't there.

-Alistair went into crisis.

-I know.

It's easier to deal with someone else's crisis.

You said you could bring up this child, even if...

That you can move past what I did...

I don't want to drag all this up...

But we have to!

It's like there's a glass screen between us.

I can see you, but I can't feel you or touch you.

Or talk to you even, any more.

And he's real, Raf...

Callum is real.

You were so quick to assume that I'd lost him...

..because a little part of you

was relieved.

Amy...

Please. Just admit it.

It's actually a very positive outcome.

Pregnant?

That's why you were still being sick.

Er, we're going to have to manage your Lamotrigine intake,

-but folic acid will reduce any risk.

-Pregnant?

Are you sure?

OK, excuse me.

Um, if it's unexpected,

you know, there are people you can talk to about your options...

A baby. Of my own.

I figured you'd want these back. For the little one.

Thank you.

LIFT PINGS

'Doors opening, lift going down.'

This is for you.

It was mine when I was a little girl, but...

every little girl should visit Wonderland.

-Time to go through the looking glass.

-Yeah.

What's the ETA on it?

Tell them to make sure it is, or I'll come and find them.

OK?

MACHINE ALERT BEEPS

What's happening..?

Ah...

Oh, my God.

Hey, you. Hi.

Where did you go, hey?

Let's get him extubated.

Sh. Sh.

It's all right.

I'm not going anywhere!

We've got all the time in the world.

Just trust me.

Yeah, I've heard that one before...

OK.

Tah-dah!

Emelia and the gang helped.

Happy birthday.

Hi. How's it gone?

Fine, thanks.

Ah, you've fitted the bovine pericardium. Did she bleed out?

Her atrial wall was weak, as you said.

Well. You've dealt with it...

-Elliot...

-I have a patient I need to check on, Ms Naylor.

-Oh. And it's healthy discontent.

-I'm sorry?

Earlier, you said, "Change is a prelude to progress".

Ghandi's actual words were,

"Healthy discontent is the prelude to progress".

I wish you understood why...

I have spent years understanding your choices, Jac.

Trying to rationalise away your wrongdoings to the world

because you are a brilliant surgeon.

You were like a daughter to me.

But perhaps I expected too much.

No. You've always been. You are...

..a huge inspiration.

Well, you're all grown up now. No more of that, eh?

How long have you had all this?

Been ordering it slowly. Preparing...

Not quite sure how THAT'S going to fit in the new car...

I didn't think.

I look at Kitty and Alistair.

The beginning of things.

Remember when you used to sing in my ear?

Every night.

Just as I was falling asleep.

Just to annoy me!

Ra-af!

You used to get so mad at me!

I'd do anything to have that back.

I thought we could get over what happened.

But we can, can't we?

It's killing you.

It's sending my blood pressure rocketing...

If we carry on falling into this chasm...

..it will destroy us, Raf.

It will destroy him.

I can't let that happen.

I can't... I don't know how to live without you.

You're my best friend.

You will always be my best friend.

I don't really blame you... about Mum.

-I blame myself.

-I mean, maybe if you talked about Star Wars less...

It's true, it's true...

Chillax. Kidding!

Who needs Mum, anyway?

You're a Mensch.

I just, I don't want to fail you.

You tried to drown yourself.

Oh, Louis!

Well, that all went very well.

In a few days, you'll be discharged.

Thank you so much, Professor Hope.

You've revolutionised my life.

Hey, come here.

Elliot.

Wasn't exactly standard procedure back there.

Mr Self. I can explain.

I'm afraid I won't apologise.

You know, all these NHS titles...

Head of Governance, Head of Clinical this, that.

Director of Cardiothoracic Surgery.

Gets in the way of...good stuff.

The real stuff.

We're, uh, going to Albie's for some team drinks...

-You should come!

-No, no, no.

You young things will want to kick up a riot.

Every rebellion needs a leader!

All right. Yes. Thank you!

Grand. Do you want a wee hand with this?

Put it back in the Death Star? Or...

On second thoughts, I might put it in the staff room.

-Rebel camp?

-Quite like it in there.

Daaa.

Daaa, daaada, dadda, daddy. Daddy. Daddy.

Daddy.

SIREN WAILS

Hey, there, Galileo.

Some kid gave it to Adele. Thought, I dunno...

One day Callum might be into his sciences, too.

Maybe?

Didn't know you could see the stars when it's still light.

You can't usually. But binary stars are different.

That's when two stars are gravitationally bound

to each other, they share a mutual evolution.

Sometimes over thousands of years.

And they often shine the brightest.

Because they're together.

# It was always you and me, always... #

Raf...

# And for ever Baaaa, ba baaaa, ba baaa

# It was always you and me always... #

I'm going to stay with my brother.

Does Mama Teo know?

Bet that went down well.

You can imagine.

How long will you be gone for?

But, it might not be for ever?

It might not be for ever.

Last night, when you rang...

Oh, God - do we have to?

No, listen - please. Just listen.

You said that I explain you...

Because you can't explain yourself any more.

You've got to go.

To meet your family.

I know it's just the worst timing...

Listen.

You have made me feel...alive.

In so many ways.

I mean, you know, if it wasn't for you,

I'd still be living with my mum!

I'll still be here when you get back.

Who are you?

How did I come to find you?

I can't help but feel that there's some bigger redemption at play here.

The history of it all...

You mean fate, Mr Levy?

Well... Maybe it is.