I'll Walk You Home Holby City


I'll Walk You Home

Arthur and Morven make a huge decision about their future. Dom battles with his guilt over letting down a friend. Zosia questions where her loyalties lie.


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Transcript


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I've got cancer.

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All the travelling and the wedding

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and everything you wanted us to do,

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-that's not happening.

-Don't say that.

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You're treating his wife?

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Yes, but I didn't know they were together.

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I don't care about that. He took my grandfather's medals. I want them back.

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You specifically defied me. I know you gave Hanssen that proposal.

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He's my friend.

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This one needs to go straight up.

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Actually, I don't think this can wait. Arthur!

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I need to see Lee, but I can't do it alone.

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Come with me, Dom? Let's do it together.

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Hello, Ruth. I'm Dr Digby.

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Morven.

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I think he's going to be fine.

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Come here.

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-Nothing?

-No.

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They must be in there. I've seen them going in.

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Fletch, these wasps...

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There's no nest. Am I the only one who's bothered?

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What's up?

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Clear.

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Still no output. Lou, another 1mg of epinephrine, please.

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200 again, please.

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Clear.

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OK, stop. This is futile. Are we all in agreement?

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-I'm going to call it.

-No, I think we carry on. One more time.

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Ms Wolfe.

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We can do this.

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We stop.

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Let me see.

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OK. Time of death.

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11.55.

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Go away!

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There's no contact details on her file.

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Well, you spoke to Ruth. She was always so busy.

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She had a massive family.

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Her workplace? She was a teacher, wasn't she?

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I called the school she mentioned. Nobody had heard of her.

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Do you know what? I don't think she had anyone.

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This jacket.

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-She came in with this, right?

-Yep.

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Careful with him, Sach. You might squeeze his stent out.

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I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It's just it's discharge day.

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Removable tracheal stent approved and attached.

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-The sun's shining.

-Yep.

-What could be better?

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So far, so good.

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Dr Digby, no less.

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They letting you out early?

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Now, have you thought about what you might do?

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Because now you've got the stent...

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You're right. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It's not my place.

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So, you doing the rounds before you sign off?

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Well, just trying to remember how to do things for myself, I think.

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Walk, talk and breathe real air.

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Yes, well, you won't find much of that around here.

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Look, we're here whenever you need

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a chat, a check.

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Thank you. I'm fine. They've been checking me all week.

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I think I'm all checked out.

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I was looking for you.

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I was just coming down. Next stop AAU.

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Your jacket.

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Ruth was wearing it.

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It was you she was talking about.

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You were the kind stranger.

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It's all right for you, isn't it?

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Never made a mistake in your life.

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Me?

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I'm a doctor.

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Doctors are heroic.

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BABY SNEEZES

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Don't you start making noises at me, buster.

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I remember when you weren't so tough.

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"For all the boots of the tramping warriors

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"and all the garments rolled in blood

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"shall be burned as fuel for the fire,

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"for a child has been born to us.

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"A son."

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OK.

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Sorry. Couldn't resist.

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What was that anyway? The Bible?

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My nan. Used to go with her every Sunday.

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Learned passages to scare my little brother.

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Well, that'll do it.

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He's starting to look like you now.

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I saw Lee. Took him some photos of the baby

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so he could see his son.

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Alison.

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I'm sorry, I couldn't get away from here.

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It's just been crazy, but if there's anything that you need?

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I didn't think you would.

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It's OK, though.

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It helped.

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All of us.

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He got them back. He's sorry.

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Thank you.

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I mean, this is going to make his day.

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She sleeps maybe three and a half hours max, feeds once a day,

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insects mostly.

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Drinks lake water full of proteins.

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Gives her mane that reddish tinge.

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It's been a week.

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A whole week and she's barely even grunted at me.

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What, not even a snarl?

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And you thought she'd be outraged.

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It feels like she's just waiting for me to make a mistake.

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I think she's rattled by you, Zosia. You've impressed her.

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-So, what should I...?

-My advice is to keep on impressing her

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until you have her where you need her

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and then ask for what you want.

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Ruth told us all different stories.

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Different workplaces, different family, different friends.

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For once, she was somewhere where people knew who she was.

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Maybe that was enough.

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Are we thinking the same thing?

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Let's get out of here.

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Yeah.

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For good?

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For good.

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I mean, not you, obviously. You should come back.

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But, yeah, let's go and see some things.

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Yeah. I mean, how long have you wanted to go to Austerlitz

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or Albuera or Talavera or maybe all of the battlefields of Europe?

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-So not a tour of the UK's best-loved theme parks?

-No, as far as we can think of.

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-Cambridge!

-No, out of the country!

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Asterix Park Paris?

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"Ils sont fous ces Romains!"

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Yeah, we can get some kind of queue- jumping thing, like a cancer pass.

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Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. That would be so good.

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And you think you can just leave?

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-Yeah!

-I mean, who would say...?

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I mean, all I'll need to do is clear it with...

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Serena!

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Arthur. You're up.

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I have a favour to ask you

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and I'm afraid you can't say no.

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The thing with Diggers is that he's a fighter.

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He still wear those glasses?

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Yeah, I bet he hasn't changed those in years.

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That look he gives from under those. You know the one I mean.

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Can make a person reflect.

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Don't be fooled, is all I'm saying.

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I'm way past that, believe me.

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Change...

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or being fooled?

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Has he decided what he wants to do next?

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Hang around here picking holes in my technique, if he has his way.

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Good to have a hobby.

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Well, I don't know what he'd do without me.

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Well, I'm sorry I couldn't be there for him.

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He's got enough back-patters and care-givers

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without your sycophantic verbals, thank you very much.

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Just be ready.

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Take care.

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KNOCK ON DOOR

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'Yes?'

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If you want leave, you're going to be disappointed.

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Valentine's beat you to it.

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-I...

-Oh, God, even your grovelling is pathetic.

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Let me help you out.

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"I apologise for...

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"It's taken me this long to realise, etc, etc, that I..."

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No. What do you want, then?

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I didn't know how far along you were with preparations.

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The pulmonary endarterectomy that you have scheduled for later on.

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There's another team coming in.

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Mr Wilks is a specialist. He's bringing his registrar to assist.

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-I thought maybe I...

-Length of the op and the state of the clots

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means that we have to shut the body down, cool it.

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We work, we rest, they work, they rest, until it's done.

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It's a very complicated op.

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And you think I could use you?

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I'm ready.

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Pulmonary endarterectomy for pulmonary hypertension.

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Embarrass me and I'll finish you.

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OK. Aisle or window?

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Well, most of it's in a tunnel, right?

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Yeah, and we'll need drinks, so easier access to the buffet car.

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Actually, you do like a snooze, so I think window.

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Right.

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Stock up on drinks beforehand. Cheaper, more choice.

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Arthur! This is the trip of a lifetime.

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At this price, it better be.

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SHE SIGHS

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I'm joking.

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It's all booked.

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Yay!

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Ow!

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Ooh.

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Ah, come on. It's just temporary.

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Yeah, I know. It's just...

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Last day, last cases and...

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..I don't even know where to start.

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Right.

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Leave it with me.

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Dr March, echocardiogram results.

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I'll need the pulmonary function test, too.

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Yeah, and a CT.

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I was down to do this today. I've been preparing for weeks.

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And yet, strangely, within minutes of you leaving Naylor's office, I...

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The Lord works in mysterious ways.

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Yes, well, then, you'll also know that the last time

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she performed this operation was with Mrs Beauchamp?

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Two highly skilled, highly trained surgeons.

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Jac has done this a number of times before and we have help, so...

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-could you...?

-OK, yep.

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Just as long as you have a clear conscience about everything.

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-You'll be there later for Arthur's...

-What do you think?

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That must be them. Thanks for the scans.

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My advice, a girl as beautiful as you, let him do the chasing.

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SHE LAUGHS NERVOUSLY

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That's, er, that's actually my husband.

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He likes making plans.

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Oh, a schemer. You want to watch those ones.

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-Are you married?

-Me? No.

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Too much other family to worry about.

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And your own problems to deal with, I see.

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In and out of hospital for years -

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skin infections, chest infections,

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a psych referral.

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Oh, yes, it all comes back to that.

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Sorry.

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-That looks really sore, doesn't it?

-Mm.

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Do you mind if I take a little look?

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It's not you, sweetheart, it's just the way it goes.

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Doctor says one thing, I say another, they guess something else,

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run some tests, nothing is found

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and, ultimately, it's a psych problem.

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And I'm a fantasist.

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Er, do you mind?

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Erm, just excuse me. One moment. Right.

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What are you playing at?

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Thoracoabdominal aneurysm

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with probable open aortic abdominal repair!

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What better way to go out?

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I...don't know, I've got loads of other patients to deal with...

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and this lady is...

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What's wrong with her?

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Well, she's got an abscess, but she's been

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in and out of A&E more than a dozen times already this year.

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So, drain that, send her home and she'll back in again in six months

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-with something else...

-People think she's a fantasist.

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This isn't about Ruth, is it, Morven?

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No. I know you can't save everybody, but...

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you can try.

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Clap, clap, clap, step.

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Clap, clap, clap step...

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No! No! Sacha! Come on! Every time.

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Is it because I'm not leading with my left

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and my right's a bit heavy?

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No, you're dragging.

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Oh, I'm dragging?

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No wonder Essie practises alone.

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Well, that's not the only thing she does alone...

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-DOOR OPENS

-Yuck.

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Don't mind me.

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Hi. We were just...

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..psyching up.

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Just wondered if I could borrow your bumbag, Sacha.

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Your pouch. Fanny pack, whatever you call it?

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Oh, my fanny pack. Er, yes.

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Er, Essie's got it. I'll ask her to look it out.

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Thanks.

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As you were.

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-DOOR CLOSES

-Sorry, Essie has the pouch?

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You do know that Arthur's leaving?

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Yes. Finger on the pulse, as ever.

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No, I mean for good.

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With Morven.

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They've got some trip across Europe planned. I think Elba, possibly.

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And they're leaving today.

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A tour of the world's most boring heritage sites, how very them.

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Well, whatever Golden Boy wants.

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Anyway, so this op, what should I focus on?

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Dominic...

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..pelvic anatomy.

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Perfect. Thank you.

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Nothing. No, nothing.

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OK, I'm going to run some bloods.

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I've told you, it's always the same.

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Book me in to have this abscess drained

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and I'll be out of your hair.

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Have you, erm...

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Have you always been this weight?

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Your BMI is very low.

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-GP thinks it's an eating disorder.

-And?

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Sorry, OK. Is everything all right at home?

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Honestly, I don't have issues. There's nothing wrong with HQ.

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It's the rest of it that's on strike.

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So you do think there may be a problem other than just the abscess?

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-Do you see anything?

-Well, not yet, but...

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Please just help me with the abscess and that will be enough.

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What kind of food are you eating? Regularly, I mean?

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-Are they flour-based or...

-Does the Mexican woman eat tacos?

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-Is that what you're asking?

-You're Mexican? You don't...

-Don't look it?

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Father's genes were stronger,

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which is ironic, cos the man himself was a coward from Stockport.

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-Big family?

-Mother's side.

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But then everyone from Mexico City has a big family.

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Hello, er...

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Ines, I'm Serena Campbell. What appears to be the problem?

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-Well, I'm just trying to work it out...

-I have an abscess.

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Yes. She has an abscess at the base of her neck, but I also think...

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Not for the first time, it seems.

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Could be diet?

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I promise you, I do not have an eating disorder.

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Can't put it on if I try.

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Well, we'll get that abscess taken care of

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and then you should feel a lot more comfortable.

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Ms Campbell, I was thinking maybe thyroid,

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but I'll just need a bit more time with her.

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I don't think it's an eating disorder.

0:16:070:16:09

Well, these psych referrals point to something.

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I just have a hunch that it's medical.

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That it's something we can solve.

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You have a hunch?

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I think we should order tests.

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-And just cover all the ground...

-No, no. Just do FBC, U&Es,

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LFT and blood glucose.

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Treat the abscess, get her out of here,

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and then you can follow suit, can't you?

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Then we stay at Stara Posta, which is where he slept the night

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after his greatest triumph.

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Catch a flight to Florence,

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small train down the coast from Pisa and then we get a ferry to Elba.

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What do you think? Dom?

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Yeah. Trains, planes and automobiles. Sounds great.

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And then I was thinking that...

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Is that...?

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Er, yeah. It's just a routine check-up.

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Ah, the baby. Of course.

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Alison?

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I'm Arthur. Not sure if you remember me.

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I remember you.

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-Would you mind if I...?

-Mm.

0:17:070:17:09

Oh, God. He thinks it's a calendar shoot.

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Please don't take your top off, I'll be sick.

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ARTHUR LAUGHS

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Tough cookie.

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So this is baby Lee?

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They haven't decided on a name yet.

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-I don't know if Dom told you yet...

-No, I haven't done.

0:17:240:17:27

Told me...?

0:17:280:17:30

Lee is very sick. And, erm...

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But he's been getting help.

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Well, I'm glad he's being looked after.

0:17:340:17:37

Anyway, look, I need to go and prep.

0:17:380:17:40

-From the list? Which one are you...

-DOOR BUZZES

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Hey.

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You do realise that you didn't have any hold

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over these operations, didn't you?

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Yeah, Dom. I don't care about...

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-I got other things I need to...

-Of course. Enjoy your trip.

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You ever stop to think that

0:18:020:18:03

perhaps this wasn't just about you and Morven?

0:18:030:18:05

-Ines?

-What stage are we at now? More tests?

0:18:100:18:13

Look, I have to ask - these psych referrals...?

0:18:130:18:16

Grief counselling.

0:18:160:18:18

I lost my mother. Years ago now...

0:18:180:18:21

And that was when you started having the problems?

0:18:210:18:23

I mean, there's plenty of research that points to trauma being...

0:18:230:18:27

I missed her passing. I was having treatment myself.

0:18:270:18:31

-Right, before she died...

-An operation. I had pancreatic cancer.

0:18:310:18:35

It doesn't say so in your notes.

0:18:350:18:37

You're a stickler, aren't you?

0:18:370:18:39

-These are your test results.

-Is everything OK?

0:18:430:18:48

There's a positive result for TB.

0:18:480:18:51

-TB?

-It's a weak positive.

0:18:510:18:53

But we'll need to do further tests to confirm. Er...

0:18:530:18:58

But we'll need your permission.

0:18:580:19:00

You OK?

0:19:030:19:04

Yeah, I'm fine. I just need some caffeine.

0:19:040:19:06

You've got a maximum of 15 seconds before we need to...

0:19:060:19:09

Got it!

0:19:090:19:11

..warm him up again.

0:19:110:19:12

Good. Get the other team in.

0:19:160:19:18

You saw how clear and bloodless it was?

0:19:200:19:22

-That's why we do it my way.

-There's another way?

0:19:220:19:25

Unless you want to battle it out with the back flow.

0:19:250:19:27

Anyway, stay sharp, stay focused. It's only going to get tougher.

0:19:300:19:33

PHONE CHIMES

0:19:330:19:34

Something important?

0:19:380:19:39

-No.

-Yes.

0:19:390:19:41

Good, cos we're back on.

0:19:410:19:43

Zosia?

0:19:450:19:47

She's setting you up to fail.

0:19:490:19:51

You would love that, wouldn't you?

0:19:510:19:53

Morven, why on earth have you put Ms Maria into isolation?

0:19:590:20:03

With me. Now.

0:20:030:20:04

I needed to see if there was...

0:20:040:20:05

I specifically told you to treat the abscess.

0:20:050:20:08

-I know. I'm sorry. I just thought...

-So you deliberately disobeyed me?

0:20:080:20:11

Your last day, so you thought you could just do as you please?

0:20:110:20:14

I wanted to help her.

0:20:140:20:16

Well, you put her through an emotional trauma.

0:20:160:20:18

You know how much stress that can cause someone with her...

0:20:180:20:20

Look, I needed to do further exploration.

0:20:200:20:23

She tested positive for TB.

0:20:230:20:25

-I'm sorry?

-It was a weak positive, but TB...

0:20:250:20:28

A weak positive comes back frequently,

0:20:280:20:30

there's no evidence of open TB.

0:20:300:20:31

This is a complete overreaction, Morven.

0:20:310:20:33

But the weight loss!

0:20:330:20:35

Yes, she lost her mother around the same time,

0:20:350:20:37

but TB causes drastic weight loss!

0:20:370:20:39

As does Hepatitis, as does HIV, as does bereavement.

0:20:390:20:43

Well, she beat cancer!

0:20:430:20:45

I don't think one thing cancels out the other.

0:20:450:20:48

Yes, I kn...

0:20:480:20:50

Look, I'm just...I'm certain it's not stress.

0:20:500:20:53

People keep writing her off, but it's not grief!

0:20:530:20:55

It's not psychological.

0:20:550:20:57

Emotional stress can have all kinds of impact.

0:20:570:20:59

Emotional stress doesn't make you sick and weak.

0:20:590:21:02

You need to apologise to her, Morven.

0:21:050:21:07

KNOCK ON DOOR

0:21:100:21:11

Erm...

0:21:130:21:14

sorry to bother you, just...

0:21:140:21:17

You're working with Dom today, right? Have...

0:21:170:21:19

-Have I done something to...?

-Take a seat.

0:21:190:21:21

DOOR CLOSES

0:21:210:21:22

My advice is just to let him be.

0:21:230:21:26

Dr Copeland's moods can be as...

0:21:260:21:29

That's not entirely why I'm here.

0:21:290:21:32

You...

0:21:320:21:33

You beat it, didn't you?

0:21:340:21:36

-You can't compare cases, you know that.

-I don't mean physically.

0:21:380:21:41

I mean, for it to have gone away, you must have beaten it.

0:21:410:21:45

You must have stopped it controlling you.

0:21:450:21:47

-There was a point where...

-I'm not looking for empathy.

0:21:470:21:50

All I've ever wanted and known, really,

0:21:530:21:56

was being a doctor.

0:21:560:21:58

And now I've got to do this last bit as a...

0:21:580:22:00

I just want to know

0:22:010:22:03

what I'm supposed to do next. Who I should...

0:22:030:22:06

Where did you get that?

0:22:070:22:09

This?

0:22:110:22:12

Serena found it in a drawer or something.

0:22:160:22:19

-It's a private joke - it's a...

-Gypsy three rings.

0:22:190:22:22

It's a collectible, sorry.

0:22:220:22:24

An ex-colleague got me into them.

0:22:240:22:26

Chantelle, by any chance?

0:22:260:22:28

Yeah, well, it's a shame she couldn't make it.

0:22:290:22:32

Sorry?

0:22:320:22:34

Oh, nothing.

0:22:340:22:35

Ignore me.

0:22:370:22:38

This might sound a little bit strange,

0:22:410:22:43

but I keep getting the feeling

0:22:430:22:44

that someone's trying to tell me something.

0:22:440:22:47

That the universe...

0:22:470:22:49

I don't know.

0:22:490:22:51

That's not really my thing, believe me.

0:22:510:22:54

I'm supposed to go away and leave this place and yet something just...

0:22:540:22:58

Arthur, your time is precious.

0:22:580:23:00

Now, there are lots of people who care deeply about you

0:23:010:23:05

and they'll want to spend as much of it with you as possible.

0:23:050:23:08

But it is your time.

0:23:080:23:10

I don't want to appear selfish or self-indulgent,

0:23:130:23:16

but then how do you avoid it,

0:23:160:23:17

when everyone's asking what they can do and how they can help?

0:23:170:23:20

The important thing is

0:23:200:23:22

that you're honest with what it is that you want.

0:23:220:23:26

That's all that matters now.

0:23:260:23:28

-Come on, quicker.

-It's sticking.

0:23:330:23:36

Either you can do it or you can't. We're running out of time.

0:23:360:23:39

-OK, here it comes.

-Just be careful, I want it intact.

0:23:390:23:42

What are you waiting for? Your theme tune?

0:23:480:23:50

Next one!

0:23:500:23:51

ZOSIA SIGHS Right.

0:23:530:23:55

'And I'd like to add my apology'

0:23:560:23:58

on behalf of the hospital and assure you that we will be

0:23:580:24:00

treating the abscess as soon as possible.

0:24:000:24:02

I would like a transfer.

0:24:020:24:03

Please, Ines, this is all my fault.

0:24:030:24:07

I thought...

0:24:070:24:08

I went down the wrong road.

0:24:100:24:12

I was wrong about the TB.

0:24:120:24:14

I'm so sorry.

0:24:170:24:18

Yes, we've checked and it was a false alarm.

0:24:180:24:20

Now, I'll be taking full care of you from here on.

0:24:200:24:24

So I'll drain the abscess for you

0:24:240:24:26

and anyone you need to talk to we can arrange that for you.

0:24:260:24:29

You see? I am the fantasist.

0:24:310:24:33

Dr Digby?

0:24:350:24:36

You can catch up on ward rounds.

0:24:390:24:41

Fletch needs help with the RTC and I'm sure Ms Wolfe has...

0:24:410:24:43

Ms Campbell, this isn't for me.

0:24:430:24:45

Well, you know it doesn't work like that.

0:24:450:24:47

You make a mistake, you work twice as hard to make up for it.

0:24:470:24:50

I let that woman down. I let you down. I know that.

0:24:500:24:54

Now, Morven, I understand you're in a difficult place...

0:24:540:24:57

I'm done here.

0:24:570:25:00

I'm sorry.

0:25:000:25:01

Thank you for your time.

0:25:010:25:03

Dr Digby, I highly recommend you stop where you are.

0:25:030:25:08

-Dr Digby?

-DOOR BUZZES

0:25:080:25:10

LIFT BEEPS

0:25:110:25:12

Dom? Hey. Erm...

0:25:180:25:21

I've been speaking to people about...

0:25:210:25:23

What do you need now? Flip-flops?

0:25:230:25:25

Look, I feel I need to explain this whole trip and...

0:25:260:25:29

and I really don't want you to feel that I'm...

0:25:290:25:32

I can come back.

0:25:360:25:38

Except you can't.

0:25:380:25:39

I have one shot to explain this,

0:25:450:25:48

-so that I don't come across as...

-ARTHUR SIGHS

0:25:480:25:52

I haven't felt in control recently. And I'm never not in control.

0:25:520:25:54

Some might say it's an obsession of yours.

0:25:540:25:57

Dom, this can wait. I...

0:25:570:25:59

I told you I would look after you.

0:25:590:26:01

Dom, erm...

0:26:040:26:06

you're not listening to me, OK?

0:26:060:26:09

I have to say this, cos I have to make decisions

0:26:090:26:11

that are best for me.

0:26:110:26:13

It sounds selfish, but...

0:26:130:26:14

Bingo, finally got it!

0:26:140:26:16

I can't please everyone.

0:26:170:26:20

There's not enough time.

0:26:200:26:22

I don't have time!

0:26:220:26:24

So you would rather spend your final days in some hotel room

0:26:240:26:26

in Kosovo with a Good News Bible and a bottle of cheap vodka...

0:26:260:26:29

-What if I do?!

-Well, it's selfish!

0:26:290:26:32

Coming from you!

0:26:320:26:34

The point is,

0:26:340:26:36

it has to be my decision. It's not yours.

0:26:360:26:40

-It's what I want!

-PHONE CHIMES

0:26:400:26:42

I suppose you think that's it.

0:26:550:26:57

I think I know better than to expect that.

0:26:570:27:00

I saw that you nearly nicked...

0:27:000:27:01

Nearly nicked the purse string. Yes, I know. I just...

0:27:010:27:04

Somewhere you need to be?

0:27:060:27:08

No.

0:27:100:27:11

So, what's next?

0:27:180:27:19

Oh, jeez, if this is a shakedown, then you're too late - shop's empty.

0:27:300:27:34

Dom?

0:27:340:27:35

I've got Fletch on the phone, wondering if we're still doing this.

0:27:350:27:38

Yeah, well, sorry. I'm just not in the mood.

0:27:380:27:40

Well, it's not about your mood. A lot of people

0:27:400:27:42

have gone to a lot of effort for this.

0:27:420:27:43

Well, by all means, be my guests. But I just need some space.

0:27:430:27:47

We're doing this now.

0:27:470:27:48

I have prep to do.

0:27:520:27:53

Why are you punishing him?

0:27:540:27:55

'It's an abscess. Simple as that.'

0:27:590:28:02

The rest is psych stuff and that could take weeks.

0:28:020:28:04

Weeks that we don't have, so here's the thing...

0:28:040:28:06

No, Morven. Don't lie. Just be honest.

0:28:060:28:11

But don't put the pressure on him either.

0:28:110:28:13

OK.

0:28:130:28:15

It's nothing to do with you, Arthur.

0:28:150:28:18

Nothing to do with your situation.

0:28:180:28:20

OUR situation.

0:28:200:28:22

It's nothing to do with where we are.

0:28:220:28:25

But, most importantly, it's nothing to do with you.

0:28:260:28:30

SHE SIGHS HEAVILY

0:28:300:28:31

Right.

0:28:330:28:34

It's nothing to do with you. Just let me speak.

0:28:350:28:39

OK, let me say what I need to say and then you can...

0:28:390:28:42

-BOTH:

-We need to talk.

0:28:420:28:43

-Oh. You first.

-You first.

0:28:430:28:46

-Erm...

-In here.

0:28:460:28:47

OK, you first.

0:28:520:28:54

OK, Morven...

0:28:540:28:55

I can't do it on my own.

0:28:550:28:58

I fell in love with this job because I wanted to help people.

0:28:580:29:01

But I fell in love with this place because of you.

0:29:010:29:04

And now everywhere I look I'm reminded that, when I come back,

0:29:040:29:08

it's all going to mean less. And I don't want that, so...

0:29:080:29:10

let's just go. Let's just go now!

0:29:100:29:12

-Er...

-SHE STUTTERS

0:29:140:29:15

Oh, I've said it all wrong.

0:29:170:29:19

I should have lied, shouldn't I?

0:29:190:29:21

I should have said that I found out what was wrong

0:29:210:29:23

-and Serena signed...

-Morven.

0:29:230:29:26

Slow down.

0:29:260:29:27

I thought I had a hunch, but...

0:29:270:29:29

..I can't do this without you, Arthur.

0:29:310:29:34

Well, sometimes you can't do it all in a day.

0:29:340:29:36

I mean, that's not possible.

0:29:360:29:38

You don't understand. I really messed up.

0:29:380:29:41

Oh!

0:29:420:29:43

I filled her with hope - all because I wanted to find something.

0:29:430:29:48

I...I needed to!

0:29:480:29:49

Of course you did.

0:29:530:29:55

And you'd do the same any other day.

0:29:550:29:56

Cos that's the kind of doctor that you are.

0:29:560:29:59

That's the kind of person that you are. You have to help.

0:29:590:30:01

THEY LAUGH

0:30:010:30:03

What is it you said? "Got to try."

0:30:030:30:05

I'm sorry. I...

0:30:080:30:09

I didn't mean to...

0:30:110:30:12

What was it that you wanted to say?

0:30:140:30:16

-Oh, erm...

-Sorry to, erm...

0:30:160:30:20

We need you both on Keller.

0:30:200:30:23

Can it wait?

0:30:230:30:24

I told you I'm fine, I'm all checked out, Sacha.

0:30:390:30:41

Promise you it's nothing serious, OK.

0:30:410:30:43

It's just there is a specialist that I think you should speak to.

0:30:430:30:46

Hello? This is Arthur Digby.

0:30:490:30:50

Hello, Diggers.

0:30:510:30:53

SHE LAUGHS

0:30:530:30:54

-Malick? What the...?

-Catch up after.

0:30:540:30:57

After what? Sacha?

0:30:570:31:00

MUSIC: The Best of My Love by The Emotions

0:31:000:31:02

What are you doing up here?

0:31:110:31:13

# Doesn't take much to make me happy

0:31:130:31:17

THEY LAUGH

0:31:170:31:18

# And to make me smile with glee

0:31:180:31:20

Oh, my goodness!

0:31:200:31:21

# Never, never will I feel discouraged

0:31:210:31:25

# Cos our love's no mystery... #

0:31:250:31:28

-THEY LAUGH

-This is incredible.

0:31:280:31:30

# My life has a better meaning... #

0:31:300:31:34

OK, I think the Tramadol's kicking in now.

0:31:340:31:38

-Ah!

-BOTH:

-Ethan!

0:31:380:31:41

THEY KISS AND LAUGH

0:31:410:31:43

# My love, my love... #

0:31:430:31:44

This is all for you.

0:31:440:31:45

# Oh!

0:31:460:31:49

# My love

0:31:490:31:51

THEY LAUGH # My love, my love... #

0:31:510:31:52

It's Napoleon Society!

0:31:520:31:54

Oh, my goodness!

0:31:540:31:57

This is incredible.

0:31:570:31:59

# Oh

0:31:590:32:00

# You've got the best of my love

0:32:000:32:02

# Oh, whoa You've got the best of my love

0:32:020:32:06

# Oh, whoa

0:32:060:32:08

# You've got the best of my love

0:32:080:32:10

# Oh, whoa

0:32:100:32:12

# You've got the best of my love... #

0:32:120:32:15

THEY TALK AND LAUGH

0:32:150:32:16

Ooh!

0:32:200:32:21

ARTHUR TALKS

0:32:210:32:22

# The way I feel about you

0:32:230:32:25

# Baby, can't explain it

0:32:250:32:27

# Want the whole wide world to see

0:32:270:32:31

# Oh, but in my heart... #

0:32:310:32:33

Hanssen.

0:32:330:32:34

# You're all I need

0:32:340:32:36

# You for me My love, my love

0:32:360:32:38

# And me for you

0:32:380:32:40

# Oh!

0:32:400:32:41

THEY LAUGH

0:32:410:32:42

# My love, my love

0:32:440:32:47

# Oh, whoa!

0:32:470:32:50

# Doo-doo, doo-doo, doo-doo, doo-doo

0:32:500:32:52

# Oh! #

0:32:520:32:53

-Yay!

-APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

0:32:530:32:56

Look at that picture!

0:32:570:32:58

Whoo!

0:33:040:33:05

The stent. It hasn't been named.

0:33:090:33:13

-Sit down.

-No, I'm fine.

0:33:130:33:15

It needs to be named before it gets signed off.

0:33:150:33:19

And I thought it could be named after Arthur.

0:33:190:33:22

The Digby Device?

0:33:220:33:23

Yeah, or whatever you think. It's just...

0:33:230:33:25

How do you think you got on today?

0:33:250:33:28

I, er, thought it went well.

0:33:280:33:31

It did go well.

0:33:310:33:33

It's important to you, isn't it, that things go well?

0:33:330:33:36

That the name Dr March can be heard,

0:33:360:33:38

whispered in the corridors, no matter what.

0:33:380:33:41

-You asked me to assist.

-No, YOU asked to assist.

0:33:430:33:46

YOU wanted to prove yourself again and I let you,

0:33:470:33:51

even after you betrayed me.

0:33:510:33:52

So this is about last week.

0:33:550:33:56

-CHAIR BANGS

-It's about how you choose to define yourself!

0:33:560:33:59

You have proved to me that you are led by your own ego.

0:33:590:34:03

You made your choice.

0:34:030:34:04

And now you want to name the stent after Arthur

0:34:050:34:08

to assuage your own guilt.

0:34:080:34:09

I made the right choice. I did it for Arthur.

0:34:090:34:11

You used Arthur and you know it!

0:34:110:34:13

God, at least have the courage to admit it.

0:34:140:34:17

And, excuse me, there!

0:34:200:34:22

Categorical proof that you stole my scarf that day.

0:34:220:34:25

I mean, it seems an amazing coincidence that someone thought

0:34:250:34:28

our little trip to Ironbridge was worthy of a career highlight.

0:34:280:34:31

LAUGHTER Were you two separated at birth?

0:34:310:34:33

It's making me slightly nervous seeing you both together. Scary.

0:34:330:34:36

Oh! Hang on, hang on. I remember that.

0:34:360:34:38

-Same haircut!

-Well, you know if it ain't broke...

0:34:420:34:44

-Oh, hey, careful...

-ARTHUR GROANS

0:34:440:34:46

It's the only bit of parties I'm any good at.

0:34:480:34:50

Always find me in the kitchen.

0:34:500:34:52

Want to shut the door on the rest of them?

0:34:520:34:55

Not really sure what I want.

0:34:550:34:57

Arthur?

0:34:580:34:59

This place, it's been like a home to me and for you.

0:35:010:35:04

Friends, family.

0:35:040:35:05

Now we're running away

0:35:070:35:08

and I'm spending my last few months without them. I just...

0:35:080:35:11

The other morning, when I found Ruth at the bus stop,

0:35:130:35:16

I was supposed to be going to look at flats for us.

0:35:160:35:18

But I just wanted to go to the cinema.

0:35:180:35:21

You know, do something normal that people do when they're not...

0:35:220:35:25

working, or dying.

0:35:250:35:27

Do you not feel we've been really full speed since we found out?

0:35:280:35:33

I just feel very out of control of it.

0:35:330:35:35

Well, then stop.

0:35:350:35:36

Tell me what you want to do and I'm there with you.

0:35:390:35:41

-We don't have to go anywhere.

-Mm.

0:35:430:35:46

I'm trying to work it out.

0:35:460:35:47

I think I've just trained myself to be a bit of a control freak.

0:35:490:35:52

A surgeon.

0:35:520:35:53

One slip and you change someone's life forever, kind of thing.

0:35:530:35:57

And that seeped into the way I feel about this and...

0:35:570:35:59

You're right.

0:35:590:36:01

-Sorry, I didn't mean to make it sound like I...

-No, no, no.

0:36:010:36:04

"One slip and you change someone's life."

0:36:040:36:06

What if...

0:36:090:36:10

What if it was the operation where it all went wrong for Ines?

0:36:100:36:15

Mm.

0:36:150:36:17

I have to get her scanned.

0:36:170:36:19

Morven! Love you.

0:36:200:36:22

Goodnight.

0:36:390:36:41

Zosia, you missed the dance.

0:36:440:36:45

Do I come across as self-serving to you?

0:36:470:36:50

You? As if.

0:36:500:36:52

You've always done what you think is right, Zosia.

0:36:530:36:56

-What you did for Arthur...

-I got him that stent. I fought for him.

0:36:560:36:59

-He's your friend.

-What else was I supposed to do?

0:36:590:37:01

Mr Malone's no fool either. He...

0:37:010:37:04

He knew his choice.

0:37:040:37:06

-So, ethically...

-We'd have all done the same thing.

0:37:090:37:12

Thank you.

0:37:130:37:14

What's with the secret paper?

0:37:160:37:18

-Nothing.

-Come on.

0:37:190:37:21

Sorry. I didn't realise.

0:37:270:37:29

I had a spare copy from Arthur's banner.

0:37:330:37:34

-If there's any you want...

-No. Thank you.

0:37:340:37:37

Is that what I think it is?

0:37:410:37:43

Look, for the record, I had nothing to do with this.

0:37:430:37:45

Just tell me.

0:37:450:37:47

You have got to be kidding me!

0:37:520:37:54

I knew it! I knew it wasn't a psych thing!

0:37:540:37:56

-Blood supply to the small bowel's missing.

-Uh-huh.

0:37:560:37:58

-Apparently, it's coming from the IMA, not the SMA.

-Ah!

0:37:580:38:01

Dr Digby.

0:38:010:38:02

May I?

0:38:040:38:05

-Look, I know what you're going to say.

-You had a hunch.

0:38:070:38:11

Mm-hm.

0:38:110:38:13

Well, it's a good job you did.

0:38:130:38:16

-Gut claudication.

-Gut claudication.

0:38:160:38:19

So Ines can be fixed?

0:38:200:38:22

Mm.

0:38:230:38:24

Shift up.

0:38:330:38:34

I can't remember the last time I came in here.

0:38:450:38:47

Hid away from it all.

0:38:470:38:49

Huh! Yeah, because this room's only ever been used for hiding(!)

0:38:490:38:52

That code we used to have,

0:38:540:38:57

leaving little, er...toys, trinkets, food, whatever it was,

0:38:570:39:01

for the next person to find so they'd know who was to blame.

0:39:010:39:04

Which surgeon you were trying to avoid.

0:39:040:39:07

Who to look out for that day.

0:39:070:39:09

-I thought it was which doctor you fancied.

-Uh-huh!

0:39:090:39:12

I guess I owe you an apology.

0:39:170:39:18

I snapped.

0:39:200:39:22

No, you were right.

0:39:250:39:28

I was being selfish, but...

0:39:300:39:32

-What's this?

-Put your hand out.

0:39:360:39:37

My turn.

0:39:400:39:42

They're the real ones.

0:39:450:39:47

But...

0:39:490:39:51

Lee, um...

0:39:510:39:53

Well, Alison.

0:39:530:39:55

I don't quite know what she had to do in order to get them back, but...

0:39:550:39:58

Means to an end.

0:40:000:40:02

Anyway, what do I care?

0:40:020:40:04

I never thought I'd see these again.

0:40:090:40:11

-Thank you.

-You don't need to thank me, I didn't do anything.

0:40:150:40:18

-Yes, you did.

-No, I did not.

0:40:180:40:20

It explains why you were getting pain when you ate. The abscesses.

0:40:210:40:25

You think that was because of the operation?

0:40:250:40:28

Once we see inside, we'll be able to find out exactly what's caused it,

0:40:290:40:33

but, yes.

0:40:330:40:34

And you can fix this?

0:40:340:40:37

Mm-hm.

0:40:370:40:38

(Sorry.)

0:40:420:40:44

It's just, after all these years, that's hard to believe.

0:40:440:40:47

Ines, what you've been through is...

0:40:470:40:49

(Thank you.)

0:40:510:40:53

It's a complicated op, so if you want it, then you must...

0:40:550:40:58

Mm. I will beg, if I have to.

0:40:580:41:00

MORVEN CHUCKLES

0:41:000:41:02

Al mal paso darle prisa.

0:41:030:41:06

My mother used to say it to me.

0:41:060:41:08

During bad times, find a solution.

0:41:090:41:13

It's not entirely selfless, what I do.

0:41:170:41:19

Being able to affect a change in people,

0:41:220:41:25

it's a privileged position to be in.

0:41:250:41:27

One that only other doctors can understand, I guess.

0:41:310:41:34

I don't feel myself today, Dom.

0:41:340:41:37

I mean, I've never stopped to work out

0:41:370:41:41

who I am outside of this place, but you, you've had that life.

0:41:410:41:45

You've met my folks. Hm!

0:41:450:41:47

I envy you, Dom.

0:41:490:41:50

I envy your strength.

0:41:500:41:52

Your heart.

0:41:530:41:55

I envy what you've become.

0:41:550:41:58

-Yes, you're selfish.

-DOM LAUGHS

0:41:580:42:00

Maybe you had to be. You had to be to get where you wanted to go.

0:42:000:42:03

And I admire that, it takes courage.

0:42:030:42:06

Ah.

0:42:130:42:14

It's here that I need to be.

0:42:140:42:16

That's what I need to tell people!

0:42:190:42:21

Then you'll prepare the vein graft,

0:42:230:42:24

carefully tying off any tributaries. I'll show you how.

0:42:240:42:27

Then I'll anastomose the graft using 5/0 Prolene.

0:42:270:42:31

BUZZING

0:42:310:42:32

Morven? Morven!

0:42:340:42:36

Yeah. Let's do battle.

0:42:360:42:39

It was Ruth, someone once told her

0:42:400:42:42

that we're all walking each other home.

0:42:420:42:44

And it was bugging me what she meant.

0:42:440:42:47

HE COUGHS

0:42:470:42:48

And now I get it, and...and it makes so much sense.

0:42:480:42:52

She wasn't afraid, Morven, because there's a bigger picture.

0:42:520:42:55

Or, at least, there's a possibility of one

0:42:550:42:57

by the very existence of uncertainty.

0:42:570:42:59

And...and that's enough, whatever your beliefs. Erm...right!

0:42:590:43:02

So keep the scarf, but the Nerd Kingdom remains mine. I'm not going anywhere.

0:43:020:43:06

Excellent!

0:43:060:43:08

Ordinarily, I'd say stay off the tramadol, but, erm...

0:43:080:43:11

I like this new you.

0:43:110:43:13

Mm. Screw the heritage sites, life's for the living.

0:43:130:43:16

(Yeah.)

0:43:160:43:18

-Huh! Erm...sorry, darling. Yes, erm...

-HE COUGHS

0:43:180:43:21

Yeah, I've been spending all this time worrying about me

0:43:210:43:23

and what other people will think and what I'm leaving behind,

0:43:230:43:26

and...none of that's important.

0:43:260:43:30

It's you, it's you, Morven, that's important,

0:43:300:43:32

and...and this huge, weird, misfit of a family.

0:43:320:43:36

That's all that matters, so, erm...

0:43:370:43:39

Yeah, give me a call when you get this. Erm...

0:43:410:43:43

We have a life to start.

0:43:430:43:45

There's a thought that everyone has their own internal age.

0:43:470:43:50

And it could be when you're a child, maybe,

0:43:500:43:53

or as a 20-something, or old age.

0:43:530:43:56

And...and...and I've always scoffed at, erm...those sorts of things.

0:43:560:44:01

Mindfulness, spirituality,

0:44:010:44:03

superstition, whatever it falls under.

0:44:030:44:06

But this...this feeling, I-I...

0:44:070:44:11

I can't describe it. It's, erm...

0:44:110:44:13

It's not like anything I've felt before.

0:44:130:44:16

A revelation!

0:44:170:44:19

Take a seat.

0:44:210:44:23

I've spent all my life worrying.

0:44:260:44:29

About everything and anything.

0:44:310:44:33

And here I am with what they call suffering, the worst type of luck.

0:44:340:44:39

Except...it isn't.

0:44:410:44:43

It's something that I thought couldn't be beaten.

0:44:450:44:47

But it can.

0:44:470:44:49

And I have!

0:44:490:44:51

Huh!

0:44:510:44:52

I'm more free than I've ever been.

0:44:520:44:54

Because for the first time, I know what I want to do.

0:44:560:45:00

And I can do what I want to do.

0:45:010:45:03

We both can.

0:45:060:45:08

Me and Morven. I'm ready!

0:45:080:45:09

ARTHUR BREATHES HARD

0:45:110:45:13

Because...for the first...time...

0:45:130:45:17

..I don't have to worry about anything.

0:45:190:45:22

Who else can say that?

0:45:220:45:24

Ah!

0:45:240:45:25

How many people find themselves in a position where they...

0:45:250:45:28

ARTHUR WINCES

0:45:280:45:29

..where they have nothing else weighing them down?

0:45:290:45:32

Where they have...

0:45:320:45:34

Arthur?

0:45:340:45:36

ARTHUR BREATHES HARD

0:45:360:45:37

I'm ready to...

0:45:370:45:39

ARTHUR VOMITS

0:45:410:45:43

Arthur!

0:45:430:45:45

ARTHUR WHIMPERS

0:45:460:45:48

ARTHUR HYPERVENTILATES

0:45:480:45:49

(It's all right.)

0:45:490:45:51

Hanssen here. I need the crash team immediately, please.

0:45:530:45:56

Can you hear me, Arthur?

0:46:000:46:02

ARTHUR WHIMPERS

0:46:020:46:04

(You're doing so well.)

0:46:040:46:05

(It's all going to be fine.)

0:46:080:46:10

(I promise.)

0:46:100:46:13

'(I promise.)'

0:46:130:46:16

MACHINES BEEP

0:46:160:46:18

LAUGHTER

0:46:420:46:44

So...you found a way to beat her.

0:46:460:46:48

-To become her.

-(Shut up!)

0:46:490:46:51

-The fox really is unscrupulous.

-(Stop it, please.)

0:46:510:46:55

So you're letting them do the post-op, too?

0:47:010:47:04

Free labour. You have your own work to get on with.

0:47:040:47:07

Try...and leave me with nothing.

0:47:070:47:10

But I'm not intimidated by you...

0:47:110:47:13

..and I will NOT be bullied.

0:47:140:47:17

I worked my arse off for you.

0:47:170:47:19

Gave up...everything

0:47:190:47:22

to be a part of something extraordinary.

0:47:220:47:25

And when I finally got there...

0:47:250:47:27

..you changed the game.

0:47:290:47:31

It was never a game.

0:47:310:47:33

You turned it into something else.

0:47:330:47:34

What happened?

0:47:360:47:38

What made you so cold?

0:47:400:47:42

(How can you accept being like that?)

0:47:450:47:47

How can you accept being so alone?

0:47:500:47:52

Finished?

0:48:000:48:01

"They watched her as they watched everyone.

0:48:070:48:10

"Always hoping the living could learn to put away rage and sorrow,

0:48:100:48:16

"bitterness and regret."

0:48:160:48:18

You, too?

0:48:190:48:20

Nah, Desperate Housewives.

0:48:200:48:22

SHE CHUCKLES

0:48:220:48:24

When you think about the future,

0:48:260:48:28

you think about all those things that you can do to make you happier.

0:48:280:48:32

But when you think about what has shaped you,

0:48:340:48:37

what has made you the person that you are today,

0:48:370:48:41

you need to remember how lucky you are

0:48:410:48:44

that all that has happened has led to this.

0:48:440:48:48

Dom? It's Arthur.

0:48:500:48:54

MACHINES BEEP

0:48:560:48:58

FOOTSTEPS

0:49:010:49:03

What are you doing?

0:49:040:49:06

You taught me to do it like this. Remember?

0:49:080:49:10

-Did I?

-Never make the first fold further than the pocket.

0:49:110:49:15

You should put these on.

0:49:160:49:18

But I'm not done here.

0:49:190:49:21

So why are you going?

0:49:210:49:23

I don't know.

0:49:250:49:26

I can't find my way.

0:49:260:49:28

You will.

0:49:280:49:30

-Will you show me?

-We can't, Arthur.

0:49:370:49:39

-Where's Morven?

-RAPID BEEPING

0:49:420:49:44

RIC GRIFFIN: Sacha, I need some help here!

0:49:440:49:46

My feet are wet.

0:49:460:49:48

Stop separating everything out.

0:49:480:49:50

You can still have courage and be afraid.

0:49:500:49:52

But you don't have to do it alone.

0:49:520:49:55

MACHINES BEEP

0:49:550:49:56

But I'm lost.

0:49:580:49:59

Come on, Arthur!

0:50:010:50:02

MACHINES BEEP

0:50:020:50:05

Ric?

0:50:060:50:08

I've tried, Sacha.

0:50:100:50:12

It's everywhere.

0:50:130:50:16

MACHINES BEEP

0:50:160:50:17

-Feel alive?

-Feel alive!

0:50:230:50:26

And so you should.

0:50:260:50:27

-MORVEN CHUCKLES

-You changed that woman's life.

0:50:270:50:30

Oh, yeah, and, erm...about the whole leaving thing.

0:50:300:50:33

I may have been a little bit rash.

0:50:330:50:36

So, no trip?

0:50:360:50:38

Does it sound silly in saying

0:50:380:50:39

I think we'd just be thinking what we're missing here?

0:50:390:50:42

Er...yes, I'd say it sounds ludicrous.

0:50:420:50:44

Mind you, the number of times I've thought about packing it all in.

0:50:440:50:48

I suppose it's just one of those phases that we all go through.

0:50:480:50:51

Doesn't take much to find a tipping point. Hm!

0:50:510:50:53

My ex, practically the only thing he was ever any good at

0:50:530:50:56

was talking me down from the metaphorical ledge.

0:50:560:50:58

SOMBRE INSTRUMENTAL

0:51:050:51:07

I'm here now.

0:51:310:51:33

I'm here.

0:51:330:51:36

MACHINES BEEP

0:51:360:51:37

INSTRUMENTAL CONTINUES

0:51:400:51:43

It's all right, Arthur.

0:51:540:51:56

I'm here now.

0:51:580:52:00

Morven?

0:52:060:52:08

They said it would be good to put some music on.

0:52:250:52:29

-This was already on there.

-Thank you.

0:52:290:52:31

I don't know what it is you think you're doing.

0:52:440:52:47

You're supposed to be telling me which flats we can't afford to rent.

0:52:490:52:53

Who's going to stop me painting the kitchen that horrible rust colour I like now?

0:52:550:52:58

We were right about Ms Marias.

0:53:010:53:02

We fixed her.

0:53:040:53:07

Uh-huh! DOOR OPENS

0:53:070:53:08

And that feeling was so good, Arthur. It was so good!

0:53:080:53:12

Because it reminded me of you.

0:53:140:53:16

I don't know if it sunk in just how much you mean to so many people.

0:53:230:53:27

If you...really knew.

0:53:290:53:32

But you gave a bit of yourself to all of us, Arthur Digby.

0:53:350:53:38

So many people, Arthur.

0:53:410:53:43

And I know...

0:53:470:53:48

..you kept a small bit of you back, just for me.

0:53:510:53:55

So, thank you.

0:53:580:54:00

Because I'll never forget that.

0:54:010:54:03

I love you more than you can imagine.

0:54:070:54:09

More than I ever thought possible.

0:54:120:54:14

'And I only hope you know

0:54:240:54:25

'that I tried to give you just as much as you gave to me.

0:54:250:54:28

'More.'

0:54:310:54:33

SHE QUIETLY SOBS

0:54:380:54:40

SHE SNIFFS

0:54:520:54:53

SHE BREATHES DEEPLY

0:54:560:54:58

MACHINES BEEP

0:54:580:55:00

SHE SOBS

0:55:110:55:13

Don't be scared.

0:55:180:55:20

SHE EXHALES

0:55:290:55:31

I know.

0:55:350:55:36

BEEPING SLOWS

0:55:360:55:38

I'll walk you home, Arthur.

0:55:460:55:48

BEEPING SLOWS

0:55:500:55:52

RAPID BEEPING

0:55:540:55:56

FLATLINE BEEP

0:55:560:55:59

SHE SOBS

0:56:170:56:19

FLATLINE BEEP

0:56:380:56:40

SHE SNIFFS

0:57:050:57:07

Arthur begins to question how he wants to spend the rest of his life with Morven, and the two of them come to a joint decision - but are they thinking things through?

Dom feels left out in the cold by Arthur - but will a vengeful Dom hurt his dearest friend?

Zosia battles with Jac yet again to win back her trust - but at what cost?


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