Two Fat Ladies Moving On

-I've left my bra off.

-You haven't?

Flaming well have!

I weighed it. Four-and-a-half ounces.

THEY LAUGH

MUSIC: Fat Bottomed Girls by Queen

# O-o-oh

# Down beside your red fire light

# O-o-oh

# And you give it all you got

# Fat-bottomed girls you make the rocking world go round

# Fat-bottomed girls you make the rocking world go round. #

-Well?

-Pound off. You?

Pound on.

Karen Bannister's 50th.

Indian buffet. What did I tell you?

Curry is the Devil's work.

SHE LAUGHS

Seven poppadoms and a mini onion bhaji.

My own fault. Went in with my eyes open.

Knew there'd be a price to pay.

I tell you what, let's split it, half a pound each.

Could you try for a stone?

Not staying for the class?

-Er...

-No.

-..cos we're going to aerobic...

-Kick boxing.

-Kick boxing, yeah, sorry.

So I said to our Linds,

-"If you want block-paved drive then you get one."

-Too right.

She's just had a promotion, hasn't she?

Oh, come on. We won't get a table if they don't get a move on.

I said, "All them qualifications, why not?"

-And he's just had a big interview.

-Maz?

-Hmm.

-Another one?

-Hmm.

-Area manager.

-Won't be long before he's regional.

-Hiya, Mary, everything twice, please.

-Oh, is it me?

-No, you paid for Bulge Busters.

-Yeah. Thank you.

Erm, that one.

I said, "Linds, I know you want to go to Miami, but what's that?

"All that money blown in two weeks?"

Now a block-paved drive, that's for life, isn't it? It's an investment.

Four-bed semi at their age? Can't take your eye off the ball now.

All the ones, legs 11.

Two little ducks, 22.

Old age pension, 65.

All the fours, 44.

-On its own, Kelly's eye...

-House!

We got a claim on the last number, ladies and gentlemen.

Please wait for the check.

Ooh, Brewster's Millions! 48 quid.

£48.50 if you don't mind.

24.25.

-Pleasure doing business with you.

-Likewise.

I'll postpone the yacht.

Your Linds will be buying one soon enough.

Now you can put your share towards my Vesuvius Deluxe 3000.

Oh, not this again. He won't shut up about it.

-What is it?

-Stupid fire pit.

-It's a work of art, that.

-900 quid?

-It's worth it.

It would be if it had four tyres and a steering wheel.

-Cost you a fortune in logs.

-You've got to live a bit, Geoff.

-Why do you want one of them?

-The summer. All year round.

-Barbecues in December.

-And it goes in the ground?

Set fire to your decking.

Anyway, dreamer, won't be having it this year.

Not if we're going to Los Cristianos again.

I'll put the brochures through your door.

Ooh, I'll have a look this weekend.

Second week of September when the schools are back.

You two might be ready to dare to bare in your bikinis by then.

-Now, steady on, they've only got a clear eight months.

-Oy!

Cheeky things!

Don't fancy you in your budgie smugglers.

It's all muscle, that, love.

Are you seriously saying you haven't seen women's heads turning

when they see me and Geoff on the beach?

-LANDLORD:

-Time, please.

I've seen a few stomachs turning!

THEY LAUGH

Anyway, here's to good times and good friends.

-Good times.

-Good times.

Right, my little Shih Tzu, you going to treat me

out of your winnings on the way home?

-Slap-up meal somewhere fancy?

-You bet.

Hey, ladies, do you want a bite of my sausage?

You're not funny, Darren.

That's about 19 million points on Bulge Busters.

Ooh, watch them.

They're hungry and when they're hungry, they're dangerous!

Come on. Night-night. See you tomorrow.

-Night.

-Good night.

-Night, Jonboy.

-Night.

For tonight's super-duper prize pot,

with a total pay-out of more than £41,000...

Don't know why I've stayed the same.

I only had two boiled eggs all day Tuesday.

Oh, Cowface is at our table.

Please make sure you have the Jackpot Jamboree flyer

for tonight's super-duper prize pot...

Oh, there's one over there.

..with a total pay-out of over £41,000.

-Never know, might change our luck.

-Yeah.

About time, Janice. Thought you weren't coming.

Been the hairdressers, love?

Was it shut?

I'm only joking with you.

HE CHUCKLES

MUSIC: Precious Time by The Maccabees

# Let's take our precious time about it

# Let's take our precious time

# About it

# Let's take our precious time

# About it. #

Duck on its own, number two.

One and eight, 18.

Key to the door, 21.

Heinz varieties, 57.

Seven and six, 76.

Six and two, 62.

Top of the shop, blind 90.

Three and eight, 38.

Unlucky for some, one and three, 13.

Four and one, 41.

Two fat ladies...

SHE SCREAMS

Jackpot called

on all the eights, 88.

-Whoo!

-Yes!

APPLAUSE

And your final question.

Lulu scored her only number one hit with which boyband

back in the autumn on 1993?

You happy with that?

Right then, if all the teams can swap sheets,

I'll be back in about half an hour with your answers.

-What?

-It's your round.

Is it? I got the last one.

No, that was me. Keith got the one before and Geoff got the first one.

Oh, yeah, of course he did.

What's he like?

PHONE BEEPS

Wheel Of Fortune.

HE GROANS

Here goes - "The dog ate my wallet."

You seen this?

-Bubbly.

-Thank you.

Blimey, you getting the ale in?

They say money don't change you!

Kath, that's not a real cheque, is it? What we going to do with it?

That? No, it's just a souvenir.

So when does the wonga land?

Well, the manager took my bank details

and they're going to put it in my account in the morning!

23,000 nicker, what we can do with that.

The timing is purely coincidental in that you're now

a woman of substantial means,

but I just want it to be known that I've always fancied you, Deborah.

LAUGHTER

Yeah, we need to make a list, Kath.

You know, not just fritter it away.

This could be a game-changer for us.

First up, we top up the ISA.

You've got to have a bit of mad money, though, haven't you?

-A bit of a blast.

-Don't be wasting it all.

Keith needs sponsorship for his breast reduction.

LAUGHTER

Hey, now the four of us should go away, a weekend living it up.

-Amsterdam.

-Vegas.

Why not? We're rolling in it.

Viva Las Wages!

We're rolling in it? Heard this, Kath?

All those times laughing at us about going bingo

-saying what a waste of time and now...

-Hey, come on.

Don't be like that.

Me and Geoff have always been very supportive of your

-gambling addiction, haven't we?

-What's that?

I was just saying the girls with the bingo, we've always backed them

and now we're all getting a slice of the big time.

I mean, you are splitting it, aren't you?

-Right, come on, get this down you.

-What do you mean by that?

-Come on.

-I'm going as fast as I can.

Here's to all the eights.

-ALL:

-All the eights!

-Stupid shoes.

-Treat yourself to a few new pairs now, love.

I'm loaded. I can afford new feet.

What about the other fella?

-Who?

-Mingebag over the road.

I mean, "You are splitting it, aren't you?"

I tell you what, Kath, if the boot was on the other foot...

Oh, don't be like that. Don't let him wind you up.

-You're supposed to be mates.

-Oh, you know he's got a streak in him.

Still owes us 25 quid for Tony Kennedy's retirement do.

All right letting us get 50 quid's worth of B&Q vouchers

and putting their name on the bottom of the card, weren't they?

-And that was last September.

-Oh, shush.

And, who picked up the tab in that tapas place, Trough of Bowland,

-Easter Monday?

-Well, he was going to pay you back.

-There wasn't a cash machine for miles.

-Well, I'm still waiting.

Geoff...

..enjoy the moment.

We haven't had this much money in our entire lives.

I'm just saying, why would he say something like that?

That smells nice.

Well?

I'm going over there right now.

Don't be ridiculous.

Keeping us dangling like this?

We only won Thursday, paid on Friday. It's only Monday now.

What they playing at?

Bank's all instant these days with the internet.

What do you want me to do,

put a balaclava on and burst through their front window?

This is him, this is, scheming, plotting.

-Don't do me any potatoes.

-Power. Loves it.

On his little throne sitting there all North Korea

doing his stupid mind games.

PHONE RINGS

Hello, stranger.

You making your shopping list?

Yeah, ours too.

When?

Tomorrow? Ooh, lovely.

Half seven?

Yeah, sure.

See you, then. Don't look rich.

What?

Yeah, baby, give us a kiss.

-No, get off. What did she say?

-No honey, no money.

Pack it in. Get off. What did she say?

That Jade Palace thingy place they like, half seven for eight.

They're going to give us some money.

Celebrate. Make a night of it, so we can start enjoying ourselves now.

That's a weight off. You just worry, don't you?

People turn and you start imagining all kinds.

Darren, they're our best friends. They're sharing the money.

There was never an issue only in your imagination.

Oh, if people only knew Darren Gary Heathcote, the dark side!

I know, I know, I worry about everything. I'm sorry.

I'll just be relieved when it's all sitting there nice

and safe in my bank account.

-OUR bank account.

-Our bank account.

This calls for wine.

Want a glass?

Chinese?

I hate Chinese.

-Ooh!

-Here we go.

Lovely.

-WAITRESS:

-Enjoy.

Do jeh, Mrs Tang.

We're learning the language.

Eh, did I tell you,

our Lindsay is thinking of going to Shanghai for New Year!

-Yeah.

-Well, 15 courses yet. Get stuck in.

I'll have a prawn. I know where I am with a prawn.

-Now what about a horse?

-Just finish your prawns first.

No, no, no, I've looked into it.

The four of us, we could go into a syndicate.

-What, leg each?

-A leg between us.

What do you think?

Days at the races. Passes to the Owners' Enclosure.

You watch your mouth. This is a family show.

THEY LAUGH

Well, anyway, the reason we're all here tonight.

Ta-dah!

The moment we've all been waiting for.

Drum roll, maestro, if you please.

I went this morning. It's a banker's draft. You can put it straight in.

-Oh, thanks, Kath.

-I know it's not EuroMillions,

but it's just nice to have a cushion, isn't it?

Too right. A bit of bonce in the bank.

Yeah, treat yourself every now and again.

Don't have to worry about a rainy day.

Come on, let's have a look. I want to count all the noughts.

Is there a mistake?

What's this?

You having a laugh?

Six grand, Darren.

Halves. We always go halves, Kath.

This is different, Debs, you know that.

Different? Why?

Why is it different?

Every single time we've had a win we always split 50-50.

Yeah, a few quid here and there.

What, so now it's big bucks all the rules have changed?

-Oh, surprise surprise.

-Was this your idea?

We talked about it all weekend...

I bet you did.

..and WE thought this was a very generous offer.

An offer?

This is a joke, Kath.

I'm entitled to half that money, you know that.

You see, that word "entitled".

-23,000.

-119 quid.

Well, I don't know anyone else in the world whose friends would

take them out for a lovely meal...

What, a £13.50 all-you-can-eat buffet?

..and throw a gift of £6,000 back in their faces.

I'm asking you again, Kath. You're not sharing the money.

Not properly.

This is wrong. You must know that.

Of course they do. Look at their faces.

11 years we've been going that bingo.

Even when one of us was on holiday we always split any winnings.

-Kath?

-What, you keep the nice round 40,000 and fob us off

with a few lousy quid?

We thought it was a nice amount. We thought you'd be pleased.

Kath, just tell me again.

Is this for real, cos I can't believe you'd try and do that?

Debs, I must say I'm very surprised by this attitude, I really am.

Wind your neck in, Geoff!

Kath!

That's it.

What are you doing?

Well, that's charming behaviour, I must say!

Fine friends you are. You've not heard the last of this!

And I want my strimmer back!

-She stood at that bar.

-Bold as brass.

-Champagne flowing.

Yeah, that I paid for.

Never once said, "By the way, what do you think you're doing?"

Yeah, exactly.

"Why you celebrating? Do you think this is something to do with you?"

Biggest win we've ever had. I can't believe it.

I never saw that coming.

-Why? Why act like this?

-Greed.

What other explanation is there?

So where do we go from here?

How can we still be friends?

We can't.

WHISPERS: Darren, you awake?

I am now.

I can't get it out of my mind.

It's churning over and over.

They think they can get away with this? I'm not going to let it go.

They'll get the fight of their lives, don't you worry about that.

-What do you mean?

-There was an agreement.

-There wasn't.

-Why are we whispering?

-There WAS in theory.

A verbal understanding. A moral obligation.

I'm telling you,

they're going to have to hand over what's rightfully ours.

Well, they obviously don't think they owe us anything.

-How are we going to force them?

-It doesn't matter.

Half that money's yours, fair and square.

It's useless. It's not like we signed a contract.

Look, you've been going to that bingo every Thursday night

for donkey's years.

We can get 100 witnesses.

Every win was split right down the middle.

-Well, it isn't now.

-Exactly.

Suddenly all the rules have changed, but you had a precedent.

Each win split fair and square.

It was like that from the very beginning.

Equal partners.

HE SIGHS

We need legal advice.

It's quarter past four. Where you going?

To Google.

Hey-hey-hey, and a hole for your drink!

They thought of everything.

I just didn't expect them to react like that.

They made a right show of us in front of Mrs Tang.

Here you are, there's a holder for the remote.

Her face. I have never seen her that mad.

It just shows you, money brings out the worst in people.

They've shown their true colours now.

They'll Scotchgard it for an extra 50 quid.

Maybe we could give them a little bit more?

Round it up to ten? Well, that's a nice amount, isn't it?

She could get her kitchen done. She's always saying about that.

After that behaviour?

Has she called to apologise? Even a lousy text?

If they were true friends, they'd have been over the moon for us,

not grasping for every penny they could get.

But...it's sort of our thing, me and her.

-We've been going for years.

-How many times? It's like we said.

If Keith at the quiz plays the fruit machine and wins a tenner,

does he have to give me a fiver just cos I'm standing next to him?

You need to get this straight in your head.

Stop letting them make you feel guilty.

We've done absolutely nothing wrong.

They're the ones out of order, not us.

-What?

-Just...

I mean, is this the right thing to do, going all legal?

We need to know where we stand.

What if it goes to court or something

and our faces end up all over the papers?

We're just asking for advice, that's all.

Hey, and talk fast. The first 15 minutes are free.

So, for the past 11 years,

there's never been an opportunity for you to keep your own winnings?

-You've always split it 50-50 with Mrs Cooper?

-Yeah, to the last penny.

-And she with you?

-Yes, everything.

Never once thought to keep it for yourself, did you, love?

Not like that, are you?

She's always been very generous. Too generous at times.

I've always said, haven't I, love? You want to watch that.

People will think you're soft and take advantage.

-Mistake kindness for weakness.

-Darren.

So what do you think, Miss Samfield? Do you reckon we've got a case?

I think you need to be aware that there's no legal undertaking

for Mrs Cooper to share her winnings,

but obviously with your history, there's a certain moral obligation.

I said that, didn't I?

What did I say? Those exact words.

So do you think a jury would find her guilty?

Well, no, it would be a civil hearing

and the judge would probably find it in your wife's favour.

But, to be honest with you, with the amount of money that's involved,

once you take legal costs into consideration, court time,

-barristers' fees...

-There'd be nothing left.

So what do we do?

You said that Mrs Cooper's one of your closest friends?

Best friend.

Hey, come on, love. It's all right.

Friendships being torn apart is always upsetting.

Sometimes when two people can just sit down,

take a moment from all the madness, just talk like two sensible adults,

do you think that could be an option?

You could have a calm, measured conversation with your friend.

Kath!

Kath, open this door!

Kath!

KNOCKS ON DOOR

DOORBELL RINGS

I know you're in there, Kath!

Come out! Kath!

Kath, stop being so bloody stupid!

DOORBELL RINGS

Open this flaming door!

Kath, come out.

I know you're in there. Come out.

Five minutes, that's all.

Speak to me. You could at least give me that.

Six grand? It's a bit harsh.

-I thought they we're best mates?

-Like sisters.

-They've kept the lion's share?

-Your Debs must be gutted.

-We both are.

-People, eh?

I tell you what, I didn't see that coming.

All those years.

Wedding, christenings, holidays with the kids.

I gave them a tow once all the way back from Lytham St Annes.

I carried his father's coffin. You think you know someone.

Right rum do, I'll give you that.

If you ask me, it's not even Kath's idea. It's him.

He's pulling the strings.

Well, he does like to take control, our Geoff.

Yeah, I know, but fair's fair, he must know that's not on.

-Yeah, I didn't have him down as a scheme...

-Evening!

What are we having? My shout.

-Lovely.

-Great.

DOOR SLAMS

Hey-hey-hey!

Oh, you know they're on the banned list.

This diet's doing my head in and I'm not even on it.

TEXT MESSAGE ALERT

Oh, God.

Oh, not again?

"I don't know what I did wrong. Can we just meet for coffee?"

Not going to reply, are you?

Well, she's upset

and we have been best mates since the first day at infants.

Well, she's not acting like a best mate now.

-She's practically stalking you.

-Oh, don't say that.

The facts, Kath.

She is trying to bully you into handing over 23 grand

and it's not on.

It's turning into harassment.

The only thing she's going to get from us is a restraining order.

Look at you. You won that money, not her and you're stressed out.

Why should YOU be made to feel like this?

What kind of a friend is that?

Hey, hey.

Get stuck in.

You seen my work jacket?

You not having that toast?

Better get yourself ready, hadn't you?

-Called in sick.

-What, again?

I've decided. It's been a month. I'm going to make it up with her.

After what she's done to you?

What else can I do?

So I wanted to apologise for, you know,

all the shouting and madness and stuff.

I never in a million years thought we'd have a fall out like that.

Can we get back to normal now?

-Put all this to bed?

-Definitely.

It's been the worst time in my life, I'm not even joking.

Look at the time. I have to go.

THEY CHUCKLE

So are you all right for Thursday, then?

Yeah.

You've lost loads of weight, by the way.

-You think so?

-Yeah.

I haven't really been eating.

All the upset.

We've done nothing but eat out, gone the other way.

So shall I take it now or do you need to go back to the bank?

-What?

-The 6,000.

-What?

-I thought we were friends now.

So that's the reason you came round, to get your mitts on the money.

-What? No.

-That's why you're here.

-I thought it was all a bit sudden.

-No, you're wrong.

Well, you can swing for any winnings after all the nastiness

-you've caused.

-I was upset.

-I thought we just talked about that.

-Yeah. And I fell for it.

I thought you wanted me friendship,

I thought you wanted to be mates again.

Go on, get out. Get out!

Get out.

# People

# Who matter don't mind

# They don't need all of my time

# Somebody told me to light up every room

# Make them remember you

# But nobody here knows what I'm going through

# No, they never do

# I miss my old friends cos they know when I need them... #

Another three pounds.

Definite contender for slimmer of the month.

Are you not staying for the class?

# What I got

# Who I am and who I'm not

# I miss my old friends

# I miss my old friends

# I miss the good times we had

# Now I don't know who's got my back

# And somebody told me to light up every room

# Make them remember you

# But nobody here knows what I'm going through

# No, they never do

# Oh, I miss my old friends... #

Just ignore it.

I thought we said.

ENGINE REVS

LAUGHTER

INDISTINCT CHATTER

TYRES SCREECH

CAR REVERSES

-Bloody hell, Darren.

-A Vesuvius Deluxe 3,000.

Suppose you think that's clever.

-What now?

-You know what.

-My fire pit.

-Yours?!

Been after one for months, you know full well.

Grow up, you maniac.

Don't talk to him like that.

What's that got to do with you what we've got?

It's none of your business.

Sorry, lads, don't mind these nutters.

-Yeah, put it down by the garage. That'd be great.

-OK, thanks.

Well, that'll look a treat on our new patio.

Limestone. Might even buy one for our Lindsay.

Princess Lindsay?

Surely she's got everything already.

Always with the snidey comments.

"Oh, our Lindsay's got a power shower.

"Oh, our Lindsay's got one of them American fridges that does

-"all the ice."

-What's it got to do with our Lindsay?

-What about you and your Liam?

-You never shut up about him.

-Don't say one word about my son.

-"Our Liam and his A-stars

"Our Liam and his Duke of Edinburgh Award. Our Liam walks on water."

You're his godmother. He's at uni doing business studies -

we never said he was Bamber bloody Gascoigne.

Green-eyed monsters, the pair of you.

Us?! It's you two who can't stand anyone else having anything.

-Go on, push off.

-Who are you pushing?!

-Go on.

-Who are you...?

Go on, come in here. Go on. Get out.

-Geoff, your sciatica.

-Get off!

MOVER: Come on, stop it now. Calm down. Stop it.

Next time, I'm warning you!

Knock your bloody block off!

Darren, just leave it.

You know what, Debs, people have always said you were

jealous of me but I never believed them. Guess they were right.

Jealous?! Jealous of what, Cath?

-You tell me.

-Oh, go on.

-I'd love to hear it.

-Well...

-..everything.

-Oh, really?

Jealous of you at Bangor-on-Dee races, was I?

Bangor-on-Dee races?

Julie Flint's hen party.

Julie Flint's hen...

Why, what happened there?

-What's she talking about?

-Ask her. Ask her.

Ask her about the fella from the Carphone Warehouse.

Debs...

I don't know why did it.

Her face.

And she said I was jealous.

I mean, of what?

Who says that? Who thinks like that?

I don't know, I just lost it.

We should go straight back.

Right away. I'll explain.

You've done enough damage.

Oh, God, Darren.

You know, we had the higher ground.

We were the injured party, but this?

I know, I know, stop saying it.

So what were you doing?

-What?

-At copping-off-on-bloody-Dee?

If everyone was gadding around like Geordie flaming Shore.

-Don't be stupid.

-Ah, I can imagine.

Gang of daft women off your heads on SlimFast.

Egging each other on, running amok.

I never did a thing, never have done.

I wouldn't do that you.

Cos I tell you what, I'd go off my rocker.

I'm not joking.

You making me the laughing stock.

Do you think he'll leave her?

-Do you think they'll get a divorce?

-I don't know. Depends.

-On what?

-On how bad was it?

See you tomorrow, then, Bob, yeah?

Whatever it is, I don't want to hear it.

Geoff, I just want to apologise.

Bit late for that.

It was nothing. A laugh.

-Everyone had too much to drink.

-Cath's told me all about it.

Everything.

It was a stupid drunken mistake, I swear.

That's what she said, just some daft lad chancing his arm.

That's right. He just put the lips on her and that was it.

You built it up, though, didn't you?

-I never wanted to cause any trouble.

-Yes, you did.

You thought you could rake up a bit of ancient history,

bit of tittle-tattle, push Cath into a corner

and get your hands on the money, and that's what this is all about.

-No.

-You're hacked off so that gives you the right to wreck our lives.

-It wasn't like that.

-Then what is it? Mm?

Is it because, erm,

I earn more than Darren, so Cath doesn't have to work?

Don't be ridiculous, I like my job.

Well, there's some beef you've got with Cath,

something that makes you want to attack her.

She won that money fair and square and you know it.

ENGINE STARTS

Or I tell you what,

is it because she's thinner than you are?

I need to talk to you.

-I've got nothing to say to you...

-I went to see Geoff.

At Doreen's?

Yeah, he's left me.

Run back to his mother's.

For good?

How do I know?

He says he needs a few days to clear his head.

Cath, I'm sorry.

Really, I never meant...

If I could take it all back.

What did you expect, dropping a bombshell like that, eh?

Oh, you must really hate me.

-I don't.

-Then what possessed you?

I was mad, it just blurted out.

You liar.

You knew exactly what you were doing.

I just want you to know, he won't hear from me what really happened.

You spiteful...

evil cow.

-So now you're blackmailing me?

-What?

No, I'm just saying, I will never tell him.

Come on, I'll give you a lift.

We'll go there right now.

Doreen's never liked me. This'll be the icing on the cake.

-You're not listening.

-I spent one night

in a two-star crappy guest house with another

man 14 years ago and you've been storing it up to use against me.

Well, that's nice.

And you knew we were going through a bad patch.

What kind of mate is that, eh?

Six grand?

Should be 30 pieces of silver.

TV PLAYS NEWS INDISTINCTLY

Calling on magistrates to think again.

Two local parks are among the best in the country.

Alexandra Park and Dunwood Park have kept

their prestigious Green Flag awards...

You haven't even touched that.

Not eating, not sleeping, not going out.

All this, it needs to be put to bed right now.

Deborah.

Are you listening to me?

I just can't.

Do you know, I don't want hear another word about it.

All that money's done is cause us a tonne of aggro, you know,

I'm sick to the back teeth.

CUTLERY JANGLES

Debs?

Deborah?

Oh, erm...

And my Jeremy Clarkson books.

-Where are they?

-VEHICLE DOOR SLAMS

-What's happened?

-She collapsed.

-We'll come with you.

No, you stay the hell away.

This is all your fault. You caused this.

SIREN WAILS

LETTERBOX RATTLES

LETTERBOX RATTLES

Debs!

Debs!

Wait, give me a minute.

Please.

Here.

It's yours. Have it.

Doesn't matter.

I honestly don't want any of it.

It belongs to you. It always did.

I was wrong

and I was stupid

and I was greedy.

Keep it. You and Geoff have a good time.

Take it.

-Cath, stop it.

-Take it, please, or...or...or I'll burn it.

Don't be ridiculous.

I will. All of it.

Up in flames, I mean it.

On his stupid fire pit.

Which is crap, by the way.

Please.

Nah.

You be happy.

We're fine.

I'm OK now.

Got carried away, got myself ill.

Crazy.

We're best mates, Debs.

We were like sisters.

We've never fallen out in our entire lives.

A good friend helps you cover up a murder.

A best friend helps you bury the body.

40 years, Debs.

Yeah, well...

we had a good run.

Door's on the latch, I best get back.

Well, can...can...

can we all get together?

Maybe, I mean...

Well, there's a band on Friday night at The Swan.

They're supposed to be really good, all covers.

Erm...I'm not sure I'm ready to go out just yet.

Well, maybe when you're a bit better?

Next week?

Geoff keeps going on about this Teppanyaki place he wants to try.

The chef cracks open eggs on your head.

And it's all Japanese food, so there's hardly any calories.

Not that you need to worry about that now.

You're looking great, by the way.

Thanks.

Yeah.

Maybe.

I'll text you.

# I just want familiar faces

# Oh, hey now

# Oh, hey now

# Growing up can be amazing

# But it can even break your heart

# I miss my old friends

# When I need them the most

# I miss my old friends

# Mmm

# I miss my old friends

# Cos they know when I need them the most

# I made some new friends and they're cool friends

# But they don't know

# What I do, what I got Who I am and who I'm not

# I miss my old friends

# I miss my old friends I miss my old friends

# My old friends I miss

# I miss my old friends I miss my old friends

# My old friends I miss

# What I do, what I got Who I am and who I'm not

# I miss my old friends I miss my old friends. #