Newark 5 Bargain Hunt

Hello and welcome to... Oh, dear, there seems to be a

bit of a problem with the transmission today, viewers.

Let's see if I could give you a hand?

Bang, bang!

Ah! That's better.

Let's go bargain hunting!

Hello and welcome to sunny Nottinghamshire.

We're at Newark at one of the largest antique fairs anywhere

in Europe, and today we're playing happy families with teams made up from one particular family.

The big question is, are they going to be one big happy family at the end of the show?

Well, let's not get into a flap about this!

Let me introduce you to the Meigh family. For the Blues we have Joe and Ed Meigh.

Oh, where's my brother gone?

And for the Reds grandad Bill and dad Paul Meigh looking lively!

But at the auction which pair of Meighs will come out on top?

Meigh or Meigh?

Come on! Yes!

Well, bargain hunters, you know it's not all about me, me, me, but today, curiously enough,

it is all about Meigh, Meigh, Meigh because everybody on the show today is called Meigh.

I feel a bit of competitive spirit here today.

Absolutely, yes.

Yes, because I think this has to be a first on Bargain Hunt.

I don't think we've ever had a whole family team of Reds and Blues and

it's going to be very interesting to see how it all comes out.

What do you do as a job then, Paul?

I work at Ibstock Brick, it's my main...

-My main job, and in my spare time I drive coaches.

-Do you?

-It's my passion, really.

-Is it?

But you're not an ordinary brick producer because you've just had an award, haven't you?

I have had an award, yes. For my 25 years service I've just been awarded... Given a lawnmower!

-But while we're on awards, Tim...

-Yeah?

I'd like to present you with this, something I knocked up at work.

-It's a little brick to pop on your desk.

-You've kept this very quiet!

-I did, yes.

-I shall treasure it. Thank you very much.

-That's OK.

And such a brilliant surprise, too. I'll just tuck it underneath my arm.

-So, Bill, you're up against the grandchildren today, right?

-Yes.

All this youth, are they going to run you ragged?

-No, no chance.

-Really?

-No chance.

-You're pretty fit.

-I think so, for my age, yes.

And what do you do to keep so fit?

Well, I do quite a bit of walking with my wife and with Paul.

And you're very keen on biking, too.

Well, I was in my younger days, I did quite a lot of cycling.

I once cycled to Skegness and back from the town where I live,

-which is Colville, in a day which was very difficult.

-How far's that, then?

It was about...

It's getting on for 90 something miles each way, but it was a very hard ride.

180 miles!

-Yes.

-And was it oh, so bracing when you got to Skeggie?

We didn't stay there long enough to find out!

Well, that's fantastic.

Now, what sort of forfeit are these kids going to have to pay you

if they happen to fail?

Well, if they fail their forfeit is to cook a three course meal for me, my wife and my mum and my dad.

And that's the challenge, is it?

So how do you feel about this then, boys?

Not really that confident, to be fair.

I don't do much cooking at home.

But listen to me, Joe, you're in the catering business, mate, this should be easy!

-Not really the catering business.

-What do you mean?

-I work in a fast food place!

-Oh, do you? Now, Ed...

-Yeah.

What is going to be the forfeit if your father and grandfather lose today?

-WHEN they lose...!

-Ah!

..they're going to have to wash my car and wash Joe's moped after we've

taken them out, obviously.

You're what they call a pretty good driver, Ed?

-I'm a fantastic driver.

-Yeah, tell us about one of your early driving experiences, mate.

Well, I had my driving test, passed it in the morning and

then that afternoon I took my mum's car out and rolled it into a ditch.

-Did you?

-Yes.

-And was your mother's car a write-off as a result of your

-half day's driving experience?

-Yes, it was, yes.

I'm sorry to reveal that, Ed, because you didn't really want me to talk about that.

But it is a classic and I can understand why there is some

competition between you lot which is marvellous.

-Are you ready for this money moment?

-We are.

-You are. Well, look, there's 300 smackers there.

-Thank you very much.

-You've got your £300.

You know the rules, your experts await and off you go and very good luck.

So which team will see its family fortune rise today?

And our experts?

Well, for the Reds a girl who always likes to make a splash?

It's Catherine Southon.

And steering the Blues through stormy weather James Lewis.

This fair is so vast our teams had better be careful exactly how they spend their time.

Remember, they only have one hour.

They have to find three items and they have £300 to spend.

It sounds so easy, doesn't it?

Well, let's find out how they get on.

Have you any ideas on what you want to buy?

Not... Not particularly.

-Do we want to spend big?

-No.

-No?

-No. Oh, really. Not too big.

-No.

No, because the less we spend, the less we can lose.

What are we going to find today?

-Well, I want to find something quite unique, something...

-Unusual.

Go for unusual, yes. Something a bit quirky.

We're going to try and look for something sporty like fishing,

hunting something like that because...

-He's quite picky, isn't he?

-He is, yeah.

The only thing we're going to find here is a cold, so shall we go inside?

-Yes!

-Come on.

Strange things, strange things.

-Give me a shout when you want to move...

-Can we have a quick look?

-Yeah, absolutely.

-It's going to be quite hard for us today.

Yeah, it's not easy in an hour.

Where's my brother gone? What's that?

It's interesting, really.

It's Persian and it's papier mache and it's a pen box, a travelling pen box.

So that would be for quills, sometimes they'll have a section for ink.

-This one hasn't got it.

-How old would you say it is?

That's the question, really, because they've made them in this form

from 1600 right the way through until the 1920s, 1930s.

This one is probably second half of the 19th century, so 1850 to 1900.

-What's your best on that one?

-35.

-35.

-What do you think?

-It's up to you whether you.

-What's your gut instinct?

If it was in your saleroom?

You're either going to love it or hate it.

You can't look it up in the book and it tells you it's worth £40.

So it's all about instinct.

-I quite like it, I think it's good.

-And your instinct says?

-I like it.

-Right, OK then. Yeah.

-I can see it making £65, £70.

-Yes.

-What can we get it for?

-Yeah. 35.

-Is that his best?

-Ask him if it's his best or not.

-We may as well go for it, Ed.

He's taken 12 off for us already.

I can ask him, but I don't think he will.

-Oh, no, he won't!

-We'll go for it.

-Yes, we'll have it.

-OK.

-Thank you very much.

Just out of interest, has it got a name?

Something along those lines, Joe.

I think we're doing really well.

I think that's going to make a good profit.

Getting into a bit of a roll.

Get in the swing of it and get some more items.

I'm hoping dad and granddad aren't doing as well is we are.

-That's quite nice.

-It is. Is it a little bit battered round the top?

You normally take this off...

-Yeah.

-Pour yourself a little drink in there.

-Yeah.

And then obviously you've got this little aperture here so you can see how much...

-It's OK?

-50 quid for that, yeah.

It's not silver.

What's at the bottom?

Walker and Hall, Sheffield.

It's probably... Oh, it's plated.

If you can get that for sort of, I don't know, 20, 30 quid.

Use your bargaining skills.

Catherine?

-What do you think of my fox?

-I like this.

-Yes, I do as well.

I think that's a nice piece.

-It's unusual.

-Yeah. So he's like some sort of

-paperclip or something?

-Yeah.

Sit on your desk.

He's got the country theme, as well.

I guess you could sort of hang it up with the...

Holes at the back, yeah.

There's no markings or anything.

No. I do like that. I think I need to ask the guy.

I can see that sitting on a... A sort of businessmen's desk or...

-Yeah, yeah.

-I quite like that.

-Right.

-His best price is 40. That's a bit...

I mean, if you could get both of them together, maybe get a deal...

-Get a better deal.

-On those, yeah.

-Yeah.

-Yeah, yeah.

-He might be willing.

-Yeah.

-Could you do deal if we bought both of them?

Bought both of them together?

- What could you do on that? - 140 for the two.

-It's still a bit...

-It is still a bit...

-Much.

-A bit much.

-A bit out of our range.

Could I tempt you with a 120 for the two?

No, I'm afraid not, sorry.

-Can I just have a quick look at that?

-Yeah. The top twists off.

We'll take them both.

-Sure?

-Yeah.

-Are you?

-Yeah.

-100%?

-You, dad?

-OK, yeah.

-Yeah.

-I think we both like sort of country...

-100%?

-100%.

-Yeah, we'll go for it.

Things are looking up for the grown ups.

They've bought a hip flask and a paperclip, but the boys are struggling.

-This way or this way?

-I don't know where we're going!

OK, guys, we're halfway through, only bought one thing.

I think outside is our best bet.

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

-It's stopped raining at last.

Hey, guys.

Oh, my word! That's all right.

How are you feeling?

-Yes, yes.

-A bit horny?!

-A little bit!

-Naughty! Anyway, so, you've bought two items...

-Yes.

-Very, very quickly.

-Yeah.

And you're on your third item now. So, how's it going?

We think we're doing quite well.

-Yes.

-We're doing quite well.

As long as we're beating them boys that's all that matters!

Well, we can't tell you about that until the auction,

but are you feeling confident, Catherine?

I was until you said you're quite happy. Now I'm...

-No, I am, I am.

-Are you happy?

That item I found I'm very happy with.

I thought it was a little bit pricey, but I loved the item. Absolutely loved it.

If you're happy, I'm happy.

And if you're happy, I'm happy.

And if I'm happy, you're happy.

# Bring me sunshine in your smile... #

-What do you think?

-Big improvement!

-Nice(!)

# Bring me laughter all the while

# In this world where we live there should be more happiness

# So much joy you can give

# To each brand new bright tomorrow... #

-That's an old corkscrew, isn't it?

-It's really old.

There are lots and lots of corkscrew collectors out there. Loads of them.

And thinking in terms of those people that buy fine wines, they like corkscrews, unusual corkscrews.

Some of the rarer ones can make thousands of pounds.

-Yeah.

-Is this a rare one?

No, it's not!

I mean, it books at about 20 quid. We've lost the end of the worm.

But it is nice, I like it. It's quite strange.

Is there a profit there? We've got to be thinking profit and...

How much time we've got left.

-I'm just trying to think.

-15 quid?

It was a successful model, so they made it for a long period of time...

So you can get modern ones which is quite cheap up to £20, but that's an early example of that type.

-It's got a bit of age to it.

-Yeah.

And it has a good look. I mean, it hasn't been cleaned in years.

-Would 15 quid be any good to you?

-15 quid?

-No. No.

-16?

-It's not mine anyway, it's my son's, but... No.

-It's 20, is it?

-Is there any better you can do than 20?

- 16? - I can't. - Nothing at all.

Not even a couple of quid? Not 18? >

-Go on.

-Just a couple more quid.

-Go on, 18 quid.

- 18 quid. - Go on, then. - Yes!

Well, done, boys! Yes?

-Yes, yes.

-We'll have it.

Thank you very much.

You have to buy me coffee now.

Let's leave the boys out in the cold while we look at a lady doing her best to stay toasty.

Are you a duvet person yourself or are you old-fashioned and like the sheet and blanket technique?

I have to admit I'm quite fond of a duvet because the nice thing

about it is you can just a fling it off if you get too hot, right?

Well, here we've got an example of early duvet work.

If you look carefully at this lovely girl she's lying back, her arms going over her shoulder.

She's just waking up in the morning and, of course, she is deliciously tucked up under her duvet.

This is a duvet with a kind of frilly edge.

It's been cast with every crease of her body underneath the duvet

and the thing is thoroughly modest.

It dates from around about 1900 and of course it's made of bronze,

but this duvet is a bit of a cover up, I have to say.

And if I give it a bit of a flip...

Ah-ha! It reveals all!

Just look at that.

This is one of these little mildly pornographic Austrian bronzes

which were absolutely number one favourite at around 1900.

Gentleman would be sitting in a smoking room and pass a

little paperweight like this around

and just fling the duvet off for the fun of it literally revealing all.

And if I turn her upside down you can see,

pleasantly planted on one cheek it says Bermann, not Bergman

which you might expect on a little Austrian novelty bronze like this,

but Bermann, who apparently worked

with Bergman and he's got his little seal mark here,

FB for Bermann, with W underneath for Vienna.

Absolutely charming.

And if you really, really fancied her,

well, she could be yours...for £920.

That's what I call the 920 tog!

Right, from one cheeky lady inside to one cheeky lady outside.

-How much do you want for this?

-£75?

£75! It's got chips.

I know, I'm not charging you for those.

-What else have we got?

-Warm up a bit.

Are you not really happy with what you were seeing?

-Not really. Not really, you know...

-Not quite that...

-A bit tatty.

I think the others have had all the good buys.

-Well, Bill, you'd better buy something because you've only got 20 minutes left.

-Keep going, bro.

Head down a bit further, yeah?

Now, are the brothers starting to feel the pressure?

Just keep an eye out, anything.

-Anything that gets your eye, just grab it.

-Guys!

-Come on, Joe.

-Coming.

What do you think about old bits of broken pot?

-Does it sound attractive?

-Not really...

-No.

-Do they look attractive?

-No.

-Not really.

-I knew you wouldn't like them. OK?

-Broken.

-So what's special about these, then?

-OK, well, look underneath.

The Crown and D mark.

That's for Bloor period Derby, 1811 to 1820 and this is known as Imari.

It's 200 years old, you've got a pair of them, the handles at the sides are always broken.

This is a serpent handle,

There was a ring linking that tail to the body.

-And both are broken there.

-And 200 years old?

They're 200 years old. They're known as the campana shape.

-Yeah.

-Yeah. Price tag of £48.

And you think...

While you were running off over there ahead of me I asked her, she said £30.

And what do you think on £30?

-They've got to be worth 50 or 60.

-Yeah, it sounds like a bargain.

If you think there's a profit there, then, yes.

I'm not going to say I like them a lot.

Do you know, the thing is if you were doing a game where

-it was something to buy to keep, then it's important to like it.

-Yeah.

In this game one of the biggest mistakes people make is when

they try to do bargain hunting, they buy what they like.

What's the point in buying it if you have to sell it again next week?!

It's not about always what you like, it's about where there's a profit.

-It's bargain hunting.

-Yeah.

-I think they're a bargain.

-OK, then.

-Yeah?

-If you think that's a bargain, perfect.

-Yeah, let's do it.

-Thank you.

-Thank you very much.

Well, that's the boys done and dusted.

What about dad and grandpa?

Could I have a look at the Vesta case, please? The straw work Vesta case?

Yes, I think it's prisoner of war work, isn't it?

-This is a beauty.

-Thank you.

-Isn't that lovely?

If you open this up...

-It's like horn or something on the inside.

-Yeah.

And then obviously in the bottom you've got... Whether it's ivory...

-It looks more like the ivory, the striker.

-Yes.

It looks like it's made from ivory. Early 19th century?

Yeah. That's what we say, yes.

-What's your best price on that, though?

-85.

I can't do anything better.

That's my lot.

-Right, well. We'll carry on looking for a moment.

-But thank you very much.

It's absolutely beautiful that.

-It is, it's a beauty and...

-A superb item.

Now, gents, I know that Vesta case price tag was a bit rich, but you've only got five minutes left.

Ah, they're back!

Excuse me, the Vesta case. You told me your best was 85.

-85.

-Is there any way I can squeeze a little bit more?

Um, just a little. Well, it will be a little bit.

Yes.

80 will be my very, very best.

-Well, at £80...

-And I cannot move after that.

-What do you think, Catherine, at 80?

-The quality is fantastic.

-I think it's absolutely lovely.

-Dad?

-Yeah, go for it.

-Yeah?

-We'll take that, thank you.

-Lovely.

Don't blame me, will you?

-No, no.

-Yes! Yes!

Now, our teams may not have any more time, but they do have money left over from the £300.

That leftover lolly will be spent by the expert on an item which will be sold at the auction.

We'll find out what the experts buy later in the programme,

but right now let's remind ourselves what the Reds have bought.

Bill and Paul scored a double whammy buying two items together.

They spent £40 on a hip flask.

And £100 on a paperclip.

Finally, they dug deep and bought the Vesta case for 80.

-And how much did you spend overall?

-We spent £220.

Did you really? That is a number, isn't it?

I love it when you go shopping.

£220 is excellent.

£80 of leftover lolly, yes?

That £80 comes to me and straight to Catherine.

-Thank you.

-You're not too tired?

You've got some inspiration to go and spend that wisely?

I'm pretty exhausted, actually, Tim, but I will give it a go because these two are lovely.

Isn't that charming?

Anyway, we're going to check out what the Blues bought.

Joe and Ed jumped at this Persian papier mache pencil case

costing £35.

They hope to uncork a vintage profit

with the French corkscrew bought for £18.

They spent £30 on this pair of damaged Derby vases.

Fingers crossed, boys!

Now, tell me, how much did you spend overall?

We spent a grand total of £83.

-All over...

-All over!

For £83. You're a monkey, you are, I tell you. £83, so I want...

What do I want? I want 100 and...

I want £117, don't I?

Yes, yes, absolutely. That's exactly what he wants.

-117.

-217.

-No!

I want 217! Give me £217.

-You almost got that, Tim. There you are.

-You almost got away with it.

OK, well, there's £217. It goes straight back to James Lewis.

-Lovely.

-I hope you're going to spend the lot, James.

-I'll try.

Well, very, very, very good luck.

While our experts browse for their bonus buys I popped over to

Hughenden Manor in Buckinghamshire, home to the Victorian Prime Minister Benjamin Disraeli.

His personality is stamped all over this house from the study where he

wrote many of his great speeches to the library where his novels and political works line the walls.

But there's another important presence that's all

pervasive through this house and it is of course the sense that Queen Victoria is here

with Disraeli, which in a way she is, or was,

because in a most unusual show of personal friendship

and affection for her Prime Minister she agreed to come here for lunch.

Queen Victoria had been in seclusion.

She'd lost Prince Albert, she retired entirely from

public life, which was a nightmare for her political advisers, including Disraeli.

In this painting we see Queen Victoria displaying her most severe public face.

It's a painting that she had commissioned from the court artist Angeli.

This is certainly Victoria's "we are not amused" face.

Her friendship with Disraeli really was extraordinary.

This normally severe and rather reserved woman certainly opened up to him.

He was, of course, a great flatterer, he used to call her his Fairy Queen,

and this friendship developed to such an extent that Queen Victoria, for her own collection, had Angeli

paint a portrait of her Prime Minister, a copy of which is hanging above the fireplace here.

Both of the portraits today in the dining room look down at the table

much as it would have been for Victoria's visit in 1877.

The chairs are 17th century style and in oak, but you

sharp-eyed bargain hunters will note that the height of the chair here

is slightly higher than the heights of this particular chair.

That's because he wanted his Queen and Empress to be comfortable

and she liked to sit and eat with her feet flat on the floor,

so he had the estate carpenter chop a couple of inches off the feet of this particular chair.

Marvellous, isn't it?

Benjamin Disraeli died on 19 April 1881 and Queen Victoria

erected this magnificent marble tablet in his memory.

That in itself was a very rare thing for her to do.

Indeed, it scandalised certain sections of society,

but she so admired this man who had created her Empress of India

and she admired the fact that instead of being buried in pomp and circumstance in Westminster Abbey,

which would have been his right, he decided instead to be buried here simply in his parish church.

Well, we've cracked down to Market Harborough to be with Mark Gilding.

-How very nice to see you. How are you?

-Very good, Tim.

Very well. First up, then, is this plated and snakeskin covered spirit flask which Bill and Paul went with.

-Right.

-How do you rate it, Mark?

I think it's really quite nice. It's...

It's got a snakeskin rather than a crocodile mount on it, a good

-variation on a fairly standard item that we see in the saleroom.

-Yeah.

And it should do OK in the sale.

They paid £40. What's your estimate?

-We've got 30 to 50.

-£30 to £50. Well, that's perfect.

Next is this paperclip and what do you think that is? Is it a wolf?

-I think it may be a fox.

-Ah!

And it works. Nickel. It's a handsome object, I think.

-It is, very good.

-Yes.

-Nice quality.

-They paid a ton for it.

-Wow, did they?

-That's wiped the smile off your face. What do you think it's worth?

-I've put £50 to £70.

-Have you?

-Yes.

But, finally, and I think most charmingly, is this little straw work Vesta case.

I mean, when have you seen one in such good condition and with all those lovely bright colours?

-A long time ago.

-I mean, they're rare as hen's teeth, aren't they?

And with its ivory scratching bottom to it.

-It's got everything going for it.

-It certainly has.

-What's your estimate?

-I've got again 50-70.

-Have you?

-£80 they paid.

Well, the more I look at it, the more meaner I think I'm being.

-If they've paid 80 we've got a good chance of making a bit on that for them.

-OK.

I think across the three items, depending on how the straw

Vesta does, they may or may not need their bonus buy, but let's go and have a look at it anyway.

Well, boys, you spent £220.

-We did.

-Which was quite magnificent.

£80 of leftover lolly went to lovely Catherine. What has she spent it on?

OK.

Now...

-Wow! Right.

-I know you don't know what to say, but turn them over and have a little look.

-Let's tip them out and have a look.

-Yeah.

Now, they're a little set of Bakelite buttons.

Now, if you look each one is engraved with a little fox's head.

-Yeah, they're lovely.

-Thinking along the lines of the country pursuits,

-as I know you are interested in that sort of thing...

-Yes.

I saw them and thought I had to buy those because they had your names written all over them.

-Foxy, you mean?

-Foxy, absolutely.

And how much did you pay for these, Catherine?

-I paid £35.

-Oh, right.

-It might be a bit of a gamble.

-You think they'll make a profit?

I would like to think so because they're something a little unusual.

-What sort of age are they?

-They're 1930s.

-Oh, right.

-And they're Bakelite, so there we are.

-I do like them.

-Yes, I do as well. I like them, yeah.

-Are you sure?

-Yeah.

-Yeah! Perfect for this auction house, yeah.

You don't have to decide now whether you'll take them,

you take them after the sale of the first three items maybe,

but for the audience at home, let's find out what the auctioneer thinks about Catherine's buttons.

So, there we go, look, Bakelite buttons.

Yes, well, let's have a look at these and see what we've got here.

So, Bakelite buttons with a fox engraved on them.

Not very interesting, are they, really?

Well, what I'd call dull, really.

I mean, A, because it's Bakelite, that's not particularly interesting.

-You'd rather have horn or...or ivory maybe or silver.

-Yeah, absolutely.

-There are far better examples of these that we see.

-Yes.

And, yeah, that'd be a struggle.

-The only thing that goes in their favour is the old foxy, isn't it?

-It is. Again, with a local theme.

But we're going to perhaps get £20 or £30 for these.

£35 paid by Catherine as a bonus buy.

Of course, the team don't necessarily have to go with them.

We shall see what happens. Ha!

That's the fun of Bargain Hunt.

Anyway, that's it for the Reds, now for the Blues.

-They were completely led by their expert...

-OK.

..James Lewis and the first item that James found is that pen box.

Now, do you not think that is the most belting item?

-Yeah, extremely good quality.

-Very good, isn't it?

-It's a very good thing.

I mean, that box in good condition, beautifully restored in an Islamic sale is worth £1,200.

1,200 to 1,500. What's your estimate?

We've got 30 to 50.

£30 to £50! Now you're talking my language!

No, seriously, it's very difficult, isn't it? Because I say £1,200 quite glibly when it's done.

-Yes.

-That's a lot of restoration to go into that and a risk that

-at the end of the day it may look absolutely ghastly.

-Yes.

So, all we need is two people, each with a very good restorer and the confidence to have a go at it.

Good old Lewis, frankly, for spotting this for £35

because it's got all that speculative froth to it.

You could have some excitement and it might make £200 or £300.

-Yeah, there's a very good chance of that.

-Yeah. Good.

Next is the zigzag corkscrew.

It's an interesting variation on a corkscrew. Condition is vital.

The helix is broken,

don't want to get half a cork out of a bottle.

So, with the broken helix, that's that twizzly thing down the end, what do you think it's worth, Mark?

-£30 to £50.

-OK, £18 paid.

-OK.

-So they've still done well.

-Yes.

-If they get anywhere near your estimate they're in profit...

-Very good.

-..which is good.

Next up are the Bloor Derby campana vases.

-They look like a couple of wreck jobs, don't they?

-Yes, been dropped at some point.

Extensive damage on these.

-So, what's your estimate?

-£50 to £70.

-Well, that's not bad. They only paid 30, you see.

£15 each for a bit of period Bloor Derby is not bad, is it?

-A very good buy.

-Even though they're damaged.

I have a funny feeling that this team is going to do extraordinarily well with their three items,

principally on the pen box, I have to say, and if I'm wrong on that I don't mind being corrected.

If it doesn't do so well, they might need their bonus buy, so let's go and have a look at it.

-OK, Joseph, Edward, how are you, kids?

-All right.

-Not too bad.

-Not too bad.

-Yeah, you're up for this, aren't you?

-Yeah.

-Now, you spent this pathetic £83.

I don't know when I've seen such a paltry total.

Look at them giggling like children, all three of them!

And you're in on this, too, Lewis!

You're just as bad encouraging them.

Anyway, you gave £217 to Lewis, right?

Has he been out and blown the lot?

Go on, James, show us your wares.

-Oh, Lord!

-LAUGHTER

It's a Chinese root carving of the god Karua.

-It's the bird-headed god.

-I mean, it's beautifully carved.

-I like it! I like it, I like it.

-You're falling in love with it!

I tell you what, just pass it over, James, these boys are itching to handle it, right?

Because that, Ed, he knows a bit of quality when he comes across it.

-Yeah!

-And, Joe, do you fancy that?

-I like it. I think it's strange.

-Strange.

-Strange, yeah.

-It's strange, I'll give it that, yeah.

-It is strange.

-What do you think it's worth?

-I think that should make £50 to £80.

-And how much did you pay for it?

-I paid £25 for that.

-Yeah, that's all right.

That's OK, actually.

You don't have to choose right now.

You just remember the words of your godlike expert when

it comes to the moment critique after the sale of your first three items, but for the viewers at home,

let's find out what the auctioneer thinks about James Lewis's old bird.

Here we go, Mark, how are you on bird gods?

I know you're pretty good on birds, but I don't know about the god bit.

Well, it's essentially a bit of tourist ware from the 1930s, 1940s.

It's not your standard British piece of souvenir ware, is it?

-Quite a lot of work's gone into this, hasn't it?

-Yes, in terms of...

the time gone into making it. It's not a bad example...

-No.

-..of its type.

Of a bit of carving.

You have to gird up your loins here and think of an estimate. What are you going to estimate?

-40 to 60.

-Very good. £25 paid by the ultimate bird god, James Lewis.

Ha, ha! Cunning old monkey.

But we've got to achieve it in the auction first, haven't we, Mark?

-Absolutely, yes.

-And that's your next role.

-It is. We'll start in a few minutes.

-Good luck.

Father and son, eh?

-Yes.

-How lovely! Any nerves at all? Feeling nervous?

-Excitement more than nerves, I think.

-Yeah, I think that's right.

You're desperate to beat those kids, aren't you?

-Absolutely. Yeah!

-The worst thing that could happen is losing to them.

Your first lot up is your hip flask.

Let's have a quick nip at this, shall we? Here it comes.

A leather and silver plated hip flask circa 1950s English.

Hip flask then. Bidding has to start at £20.

20 I'm bid for this one. At 20. Bid at 20. Are you all out at £20?

At 20. Five. 30. I'll take five.

Come on, come on, come on! Come on! One more!

£35. £40 do I see? It's 35. £35.

Internet sales as well.

Oh, come on! One more.

-£35.

-It's only a fiver.

-Bad luck.

It's only minus £5 on that.

Lot number 16, a wall silver plated paperclip.

Lots of interest with me here. 45.

55. 65 I'm bid.

65 bid here. At £65. 75.

80 in the room. At £80. At 80 bid.

-BOTH: Come on.

-I'm at 85. 90. Five.

100. 110. 120.

-Yes!

-Come on!

-120. Bid at 120. 130.

140. 140 in the room. 140 internet.

-150.

-Oh, look out!

-160.

-How exciting!

Come on!

£160 in the room. At 160. 170...

Don't stop, I like it!

170 here on the internet. 170.

Last chance, then.

-Wow!

-170.

-Yes!

-Yes!

Well done. I'm so pleased for you!

-Great.

-So that's plus 65.

-That's superb.

-You're £65 up.

-And we've got the Vesta case yet.

-And you've got the Vesta case to come.

-Oh, dear!

-Wow, that's brilliant!

Standby for this.

Early 19th century.

And bidding here £45 with me.

45 I'm bid on the book. At 45 here.

At 50. Five. 60. Five.

-Come on.

-70. Five. 80.

£80. Five looking for. It's £80.

-In the room at 80.

-Come on!

-Internet what about you? It's 85 here.

-85.

85. 90. 90 in the room.

At £90. At 95 I'll take.

£90. The internet's out there. It's in the room at 90. Last chance, then.

£90 and selling away here at £90.

Well done, £90. That's fine.

-You're plus 10.

-It should have doubled that.

I'm very disappointed with that.

Which means overall you are plus 75.

-Plus 75.

-Fantastic!

-Superb!

-That's not bad, is it?

-Come on.

-That's good.

-That's very good for the Meigh family.

-Well done.

-What about these buttons?

-I'm pleased for you.

-I don't want to influence you.

-Stick with the money we've got.

-OK, then.

-I don't want to influence.

-No, please, I think you should...

-I've got to beat the boys.

-I'm just so disappointed about the Vesta case.

-Are you sure you want to do this?

-Yeah.

-We're not going with the fly buttons, but we'll sell them anyway.

Bidding here with me starts at £10.

10 I'm bid. 10 here on the buttons.

At 10 I'm bid here. At £12. £15. 18.

20. 22 in the room. At £22 I'm bid.

25. 25 bid. At 25.

Internet at 25. 28 I'll take. 28.

28 bid. At 28. Internet's turn then.

It's in the room at 28.

28. And selling away now at £28.

-Yeah, good choice.

-You did the right thing.

-£28.

-They were a bit of a gamble, weren't they?

-Yeah.

You would have been minus seven on that, but you preserved your capital and you are plus 75.

-Excellent.

-Well done.

-Great.

Now the big trick is, don't tell the boys a thing, all right?

-No.

-No, absolutely not.

-Why spoil their day?

-I'm going out there miserable.

-Po-po.

Yeah. I hope so, I hope so.

-Grandpa and dad are going to look miserable.

-We're going to look miserable.

-Well done anyway.

-Thank you.

-We'll reveal all later.

-Now, Joe and Ed, are you excited?

-Very.

-Very.

-Do you know how your grandfather and your father have done?

-Not at all.

-Not at all. You're completely in the dark, right?

-Yes.

-That's exactly how we like to keep it.

First up though is the fabulous papier mache box and here it comes.

Where are we going to start this one?

Anyone give me £100?

Silence.

50 I'm bid then. And you're all out.

50 I'm bid here.

On the book at £50. At 50. 60. 70.

80. 90. 100. 110.

110. Bid at 110.

At 110. I'm here at 110. At 110.

I'll take 20. Are you all out?

The bid's with me at 110.

£110. Make no mistake.

Come on, it's worth more!

Selling on the book here at £110.

-That's it.

-Yes!

-£110.

-Well done! Very well done.

-Well, a profit is a profit, isn't it?

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

How much is that? That's 95.

That's 65. That's £75.

You are plus £75.

At a stroke you are 75.

Now, here comes the corkscrew.

Bidding opens with me here at £20.

-Profit already!

-20 I'm bid.

-Get in!

I've got 20 bid here. At £20. At 20 I'm bid. At 20. Internet?

You out as well? 22. 25 now. At £25.

-25 I'm bid. 25 bid here. At 25.

-Hey!

-Eight I'll take. At 25.

-This'll do!

-Your turn then. At 25 I will sell. The bid's on the book at 25.

-Go on!

-Selling at £25.

-That's plus £7.

-Spot on, spot on.

-Smashing.

We seem to have profit profit here.

Next up are the pair of vases. Now, James.

Bidding starting here on the book at 22. 25. 28 I'm bid.

£2 off, £2 off.

At 28. 30 I'll take. It's 30. 32 now. At 32 bid. At 32.

It's profit, Joe! Go on!

It's £32. At 32.

Make no mistake, I am selling here. It's £32.

-A pair of them!

-No!

32!

A profit's a profit. 32 is plus £2.

They're cheap - really cheap.

-75.

-They were quite damaged, though.

82. £86. No, £84. Plus £84.

-Plus £84.

-You are £84 up.

Come on, yeah, but them vases didn't go.

-That's rank old statue, no way!

-Go on.

That what? That rank old what?

Rank old statue.

I don't know! What do you think?

It's the game, like. Play the game. It's fun.

-Take a risk.

-Go on, then we'll go.

-Yeah.

-We'll do it.

All right, there is a decision. We are going with the rank old statue.

Chinese carved, hardwood figure of Karua, the bird god,

and bidding has to start at £22.

We're all right. Come on.

22 for 25. Now at 25. 28. 30.

-You're in profit.

-32. 35.

38. 40. 42.

45. 48. 50. Five. 60.

-65.

-Rank old statue!

-70. 75. 80.

-Look at this!

-Five.

85 there are on the end. At 85.

And you're out. It's £85.

And selling at 85.

-Get in!

-Ye of little faith!

-You did it!

-That was my decision, my decision!

Plus £60 on that, yeah? I think we have got something like £144 here!

-That was absolutely fantastic.

-Good.

I think we have profit and some.

I think we are up £144.

-Oh!

-Yes!

-Oh, dear!

-That's beautiful.

Look at his face.

-So relieved.

-Now listen, don't tell the parents.

We don't know what they've done.

-Don't say to the parents.

-Not a word.

-Don't tell them nothing, all right?

-Not a word.

-OK, fine.

Well, if we scroll back to the beginning of this show, of course, we'll all remember that

-there was a lot of cocky chat about what would happen if

-I

-win and what would happen if

-I

-win,

and there are forfeits between this happy family.

If I remember rightly, boys,

if you lose you have to cook dinner for the senior members of the family.

-And, boys, if you lose you have to do a certain amount of cleaning work, isn't it?

-Yes, yes.

Of cars and motor bicycles and all the rest of it.

And we're going to hold you to this forfeit process,

whoever has won and whoever the runner up might be.

And the runners up today are...

-the Reds!

-LAUGHTER

Oh, no!

You're going to be cleaning the cars, you'll be cleaning...

You don't have to do any cookery, all right? So, runners up, hey?

Runners up by being ahead by £75 at the end of the show, which is pretty good.

I'll hand out £75 here. Who's going to take the money? Are you going to take this, Paul?

-I'll take that. Thank you very much.

-There's your £75.

But the victors, the boys, the kids today who are up by £144.

-GROANING Oh, goodness!

-Look at their faces!

Oh, dear!

140 there, and here comes your other four, all right?

-Are you happy with this?

-Oh!

What do you mean?

-You're giving your younger brother the £4 and pocketing the 140, yes?

-Yeah.

-Are you pleased about that?

-Oh, I've only got one now!

-LAUGHTER

-All very good fun. A splendid result all round, and join us soon for some more bargain hunting, yes?

-Yes!

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