Episode 5 Beat the Brain

Hello, it's Brain here.

I've created some real mind-teasers for our team today.

Here's a couple for you to try.

Rearrange the cuttings to form a word.

Here's another one.

Which of the four wheels on the right matches the one on the left?

I'll give you the answers at the end of the show.

Now, let's see whether our team today has what it takes to

Beat The Brain.

APPLAUSE

Please welcome a man who'd make any head spin - John Craven.

Well, thank you very much and welcome to Beat The Brain.

The quiz that tests how you think instead of what you know.

Let's say hello straight away to Lady Logic herself.

So, how are you today, Brain?

Oh, if I'm Lady Logic - you, Sir John, are my knight in shining jumpers.

Well, I've worn jumpers all my career and never been called that before.

But then you can never predict what The Brain is going to say,

as our team is about to find out.

Please introduce yourselves.

I am Paul, I'm a deputy club manager.

Hi, I'm Steve and I am an auctioneer and fine art valuer.

I am James and I'm a police detective.

I'm Sue, I'm the team captain and I'm a customer service executive.

APPLAUSE

Well, welcome to the show. Sue, as team captain, have you chosen a name

-for your team?

-Yes. We're the Quarter Minds, John.

Why is that?

Well, we're obviously one of four - four making a quarter -

-we've got four good minds.

-You've got pretty good minds, as well?

-Yeah.

-So, are you ready to play?

-ALL:

-Yes.

-Well, here's how it works.

The show's Brain is divided into six Zones.

Logic, Memory, Orientation,

Observation, Language, and Multi-tasking.

Now, The Brain will select just four from those six Zones for you

to play today and, Sue, as team captain, you've got to decide

-which members of your team you think will be best in each of the Zones. OK?

-Yeah.

You're playing for time instead of points,

with every correct answer adding three seconds to your total -

to your Brain Bank.

The more time you build up, the more chance you have of Beating The Brain

in today's final and walking away with the jackpot of £3,000.

-So, Quarter Minds, shall we play?

-Yes.

-ALL:

-Yes.

Time to find out which Zone you'll be facing first.

Brain, a Zone, please.

Orientation, Sue. Who are going to nominate for this one?

-Er...what do you think, guys?

-I think I should go for this one.

-Yeah?

-Yeah.

-Yeah, I think we'll go with Paul on the end.

He managed to find his way here to the studio today, so...

I think it'll be good at this one.

Paul, come and join me in the Orientation Zone.

Apart from finding your way here, are you generally good at Orientation?

Well, I'm quite the traveller. You know, I was a real backpacker in my younger years.

I still like travelling now and I like to know where I'm at.

-So, ready for Orientation, then?

-Certainly am.

OK, you'll play two games in this Zone,

-both games have three questions worth three seconds each.

-Right.

Brain, what's the first game?

-Hello, Paul.

-Hello, Brain.

-I like your floppy hair.

-I'm not available at the moment, but, yeah.

Shut up.

THEY LAUGH

Here's your first game.

Paul, what is the real time?

To help you out, have a trial run.

The mirror image, what's the real time?

-Quarter past nine?

-Quarter past nine, you're saying. Are you right?

Yes, you are. Well done.

So, that's how it works, are you happy to play the game?

-Yes, I certainly am.

-Let's do it. Please, Brain, let's play.

You have a maximum of 45 seconds to answer three questions, Paul.

But please remember I can only accept your first answer.

Every correct answer will add three seconds to your Brain Bank.

Your game starts now.

-Ten past nine.

-Ten past nine, you're saying.

No. Quarter past ten. Next one.

-Ten to three.

-Ten to three, you say.

-No.

-Dear lord.

One more to go. 20 seconds left.

-Five past four.

-Five past four, you're saying.

Yes, that's correct. That is correct.

-It is very deceiving, isn't it?

-Yes, I was just starting to get the hang of it at the last one.

Brain must be quite pleased. On to game two, please.

-Don't be nervous, Paul. What's your favourite colour?

-Purple.

Correct. See, you're good at answering questions.

THEY LAUGH

Here's your second game.

Which wheel matches the one on the left?

To get your eye in, Paul, I'll give you a trial run.

-Which matches?

-I think it's A.

-You're saying A.

Let's spin and see if your right.

-You are indeed. No problem with that one.

-No.

-Let's see how you do when you play it for real.

-Yes.

-Off we go, Brain.

Remember, you have a maximum of 45 seconds to answer three questions.

Please remember I can only accept your first answer.

Your game starts now.

-What are you saying?

-I'm going to go for...

-D.

-D, you're saying. Let's see if you're right.

No, it was B. Next one.

-That's A.

-A, you're saying?

-Yes.

No, it was D.

Final one. 20 seconds to go.

-C?

-C?

No, D.

-Never mind. Never mind.

-Terrible.

-They are very difficult, these, aren't they?

-Yeah.

-Brain, you're playing a blinder so far.

-Absolutely.

But it's very brave of Paul to be the first one up

and he still has lovely, floppy hair.

THEY LAUGH

Paul, you added three seconds in that Zone.

This means, in total, Quarter Minds have three seconds in their Brain Bank.

APPLAUSE

Time to find out our next Zone, please, and who is going to take it on.

Brain, a Zone, please.

Ooh, Sue...

A big smile, Sue, when that came up. What you were wanting?

Yeah, I was actually wanting Language to come up as one of the Zones.

That was my favourite one out of all of them

and I think my other two team-mates would better on other Zones.

-So, I'm happy with that.

-So, come and join me, then, in the Language Zone.

What do you do as a job?

I work for a major airline at Gatwick

-and I'm a customer service executive.

-What does that mean?

We deal with ticketing reservations and also we meet and greet

-celebrities and royals that come through the airport.

-Who have you met?

-Lots, John.

Most recently Robbie Williams and Mariah Carey.

I've met her, as well. And a few royals.

So, what makes you think you'll be very good at languages?

Well, I've always being a words kind of person. I love playing Scrabble,

Words With Friends, and I like word games, puzzles - that sort of thing.

Solving puzzles, anagrams. I'm not so good with numbers,

-so I think this is more my zone.

-This could be you.

Well, let's find out if the way you think about Language is how

Brain thinks about it, shall we? So, Brain, please reveal

the first game Sue will be playing.

-Hello, Captain Sue.

-Hello, Brain.

-This is your first game.

What word is missing from all three others?

To give you some practice have a trial run.

A three-letter word, obviously.

-It's gag.

-Gag?

-Yeah.

-Let's see if you're right.

Yeah, mortgage, luggage, engage.

Yeah, that's fine. Looks as though you've chosen the right zone.

-I hope so.

-Let's see when we go for real.

Captain Sue, you can have as many guesses as you like, but I will not

move onto the next question until you give me the correct answer or pass.

-OK.

-You have 45 seconds to answer three questions.

Your game starts now.

-Oh, gosh. Er...it's spa. S-P-A.

-Let's see if you're right.

Yes, you are. A spa. Next one.

A-N... Anagram?

A-N... Erm...

-That's a difficult one.

-You can pass, if you like.

Erm... (A-N-A...)

It's...

-Nag? Nag. N-A-G.

-N-A-G. Nag.

Yes, absolutely right. Next one.

Erm...

B-O-R-D... B-S-0-R...

C-0-U...

-Our. O-U-R.

-Our. Let's see if you're right.

-Oh, oar.

-Oar.

-So close.

Yeah, you are very, very close there.

-But time ran out for you. Not a bad start.

-Not bad, John.

-I'm pleased with that.

-So, on we go to game two.

Here's your second game, Sue.

Rearrange the newspaper cuttings to form a word.

To get you in the groove of this, have a trial run.

-Ordinary.

-Ordinary, you're saying. Is that correct?

Yes, it is.

No problems there. So, let's move on quickly to play the game.

You can have as many guesses as you like, but I will not move on

to the next question until you give me the correct answer or pass.

You have 45 seconds to answer three questions.

Your game starts now.

Oh, gosh. That's a difficult one.

-Roulette.

-Roulette?

Yes, that's right. Next one.

(E-R. S-I...)

Oh, gosh.

-Easier.

-Easier.

-Yes, that's right.

-I wish it was!

One more. 20 seconds to go.

Oh, gosh.

Scent.

-Adolescent!

-Adolescent.

-Yes, well done! With 13 seconds to spare.

-That was tough!

-I think you played a captain's round there.

-Thank you. I'm pleased.

-You must be pleased that Language, you know, turned out to be the right decision for you.

-Yes.

-What do you think, Brain?

-Well, I agree, Sir John. She was a worthy captain.

Sue, you added 15 seconds in that Zone.

This means, in total, Quarter Minds have 18 seconds in their Brain Bank.

-Well done, Sue.

-Thank you, John.

If you wouldn't mind rejoining the rest of the Quarter Minds.

So, how about you at home? How are you managing?

Are you beating The Brain? There are two more Zones to come.

So, let's see how you cope with those.

We'll find out which Zone is next and who is going to play it.

Brain, the Zone, please.

Multi-tasking. So...Sue.

Steve is definitely multi-tasking. In his line of work - he's an auctioneer -

so he has to be quite with it with listening and observation,

-so he's doing a lot of things all at the one time. So, I think he's going to be good at this.

-Steve.

Well, come up and join me, please.

I suppose Sue was right. In your job, as an auctioneer,

-you do have to think of a lot of things at once.

-Oh, yes. Yeah.

When you get something brought to you, you have to think,

what age is it? Is it right? Where did it come from?

-How much is it worth? And how much can I get the customer?

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

Don't forget there are another 18 precious seconds on offer

in this Zone. That's three seconds for every correct answer.

So, Brain, please reveal the first game that Steve will be playing.

-Hello, Steve.

-Hello, Brain.

-You're an auctioneer? Mm?

-I am, indeed.

What valuation would you put on me?

-Oh, you're priceless, my darling.

-Correct answer.

-Do I get three seconds for that?

-No.

-Damn.

Here is your first game.

When the number of sheep matches the number I say,

add that number to the total.

You can warm up by having a trial run.

Four, four,

two, one,

one,

two, two,

two, four,

two.

-Nine.

-Nine, you're saying, Steve. Is that correct?

It is, yeah. OK?

Obviously, your auctioneer brain working well, there.

-Would that be BLEAT The Brain?!

-Oh, BLEAT The Brain, yes...

What do you think of that one, Brain?

If he makes any more jokes I will BAA him from this.

THEY LAUGH

Please remember I can only accept your first answer.

Every correct answer will add three seconds your Brain Bank.

Your game starts now.

Two, three, one,

four, four, two,

one, two, two,

four.

-Eight.

-Eight, you say. Are you right?

Yes, you are. Next one, please.

One, four, two,

one, three, three,

two, one,

four, one.

-Crikey. 11.

-11, you're saying.

It speeded up a bit there, didn't it?

-Ten.

-It was ten. Just one out. Only one out. Next one, please.

Three, two, three, two,

four, one, four,

three, two, four.

-I got the one at the beginning.

-THEY LAUGH

-Seven.

-Seven, is that a guess?

-Yes. Totally.

Let's see if it's a good guess.

-13.

-Not a good guess.

-No. But I don't think anybody else

-would have done very well there.

-Never mind. Onto game two, please.

Here's your second game.

Count the number of times each arrow passes its needle.

Here's a trial run of what I mean.

-What are you saying there?

-I think four on the left and five on the right.

Four and five. Is that correct?

-Absolutely. I saw you were using your hands.

-Oh, yes.

-I can't play a note. But...

-A very good idea that.

-Unless it gets to about 15...

-And then I'm...

-Right.

If it's like those sheep, I'm lost.

-But are you ready to play?

-As ready as I'll ever be.

-OK. Off we go.

Please remember I can only accept your first answer.

Your game starts now.

-What are you saying?

-One left, two right.

-One and two. Is that correct?

It is, indeed. Next one, please.

Oh, my stars!

-Yeah, you lost me there.

-Have a guess.

-12 left, eight right.

-12 and eight. Is that right?

-Six and four.

-It was so fast.

It was certainly going fast in the other direction, as well. One more to go.

What are you saying this time?

-Eight left.

-Eight left.

-Five right.

Eight and five. Let's see if that's right.

-Six and three. Oh, dear, Steve.

-That's not good.

Brain, you were pretty hard on him.

I was. I'm so sorry, Steve.

Now, go back to John Craven's wardrobe and put the jumper back.

THEY LAUGH

Steve, you added six seconds in that Zone.

This means, in total, Quarter Minds have 24 seconds in their Brain Bank.

-Good to see you, Steve.

-Thank you.

-Hope you enjoyed playing.

Well, James, you're our final player.

So, why don't you come and join me and we'll find out

which of the three remaining Zones you will be playing?

So, come up here.

-Hi, there.

-Hello, James.

-Thank you.

So, what one are you looking forward to? By my reckoning

there's Memory, Logic and Observation left.

I think I'd be quite good at Memory.

Obviously with my job as a police officer I've got to remember

a lot of things. Observation, again, with my job I'm quite good at that.

And Logic, well, you'd like to think...

But she's been quite tough today, hasn't she?

But what you're saying, really, is - "Bring it on, Brain.

"I can handle you in any of the Zones!"

No, that's not what I'm saying at all!

Well, that is find out now if you're going to be laughing at the end of this Zone,

because we're going to find out which one Brain has chosen for you to play.

So, Brain, the Zone, please.

-Logic.

-It's not what I wanted, but it'll do!

Well, we'll see. So, what is the first game, please, Brain?

-Oh, hello, James.

-Hi, Brain.

-I hear you love Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

THEY LAUGH

I don't know what you're on about!

What song from that musical reminds you of me?

Don't say Me Ol' Bamboo.

That's exactly what I was going to say!

Truly Scrumptious.

Yeah, Truly Scrumptious. We'll go with that!

This is your first game.

Three darts will be thrown, you must add up the score

and subtract it from the total.

Have yourself a trial run.

14.

Double 11.

16.

22, 14, 16...

20, 30, 30...

40, 52...

52 from 501 is...

-449.

-449, you're saying. Let's see if that's correct.

-It is, indeed.

-That was hard!

-Do you score in darts matches?

-No.

I think you can see why not.

And don't forget now you're up against the clock. Isn't he, Brain?

Yes, James. You only have 45 seconds to answer three questions correctly.

Oh, dear.

Your game starts now.

12.

18.

19.

30, 49...

49 from 501 is...

500 minus 49, that's 51.

-52. 452.

-452, you're saying.

Yes, that's correct.

Double 19.

14. six.

Six, that's 20. 39.

So, 39 from 452. Let me just double-check that.

39, from 452 is...

-One second left.

-Oh...

-Oh, time out.

Oh, dear. You were almost there, I think. Shall we get the right answer?

-Was I right with 39?

-394.

-Oh, 38.

-Never mind, James.

-I was dreading that one.

-OK, then. Shall we play the second game?

-If we must!

THEY LAUGH

-We must. Brain, what's coming up?

-Here's your second game, James.

-Use the clues to work out the position of a particular animal.

-Oh.

The clues describe the animals from your perspective.

Here's a trial run to help you get a feel of the game.

What do you make of this one then, James?

Right. Brian is right of Waldo.

So, I take it Waldo's the middle one and Brian is...

Then Waldo's right of Angus, so Angus is the black one on the left.

On the left. Let's have a look and see.

Yeah, you're right.

-Angus, as well. A Scottish cat.

-Yes

So, Brain, I think we've got the hang of this one. So, straight into the game, please.

You have 45 seconds to answer three questions correctly.

Your game starts now.

HE MUTTERS

-Where is Pop?

-So, Pip is not next to Pop.

Pip is left... Is Pop on the left?

Pop on the left, you're saying. Let's find out.

No, he's on the right. Next one quickly.

Buzz is not left of Bugs.

Buzz is left of Buster.

Where's Buzz?

-In the middle.

-In the middle you're saying.

-Yes.

-Yes. Well done. Ten seconds to go over for last one.

Crystal is not right of Mercedes.

-Mercedes is not right of...

-Have a guess, have a guess.

-On the right.

-On the right. OK. Let's see.

-Yes!

-Oh, my God!

-THEY LAUGH

I can't even tell you their names.

-But you guessed right.

-I did.

-Brain, how about that?

-James, you added nine seconds in that Zone.

This means - Quarter Minds -

you have finished with a grand total of 33 seconds in your Brain Bank.

-Good to see you, James.

-Thank you very much.

-Return, please, to the Quarter Minds.

Well, we've finished the individual Zones, now it's time for our team

to try to Beat The Brain one last time

and take home some serious cash in today's final.

Well, Quarter Minds, you've added 33 seconds to your Brain Bank,

now is your chance to get put it to good use.

Because to win, you each need to answer two questions correctly

within your 33 seconds to walk away with today's £3,000 jackpot.

But if you can't do that, all is not lost.

The Brain has kindly given you an extra two minutes

to get the required answers.

But for every further second you take,

£25 is lost from the total

and if the time runs out, so does the money.

-OK? Sue, as captain you've chosen the order of play.

-Yes.

I think I'd like to go first to get it over with, John, to be honest.

The others said they didn't want to go first, so sort of pushed into it.

And James, being the slightly strongest one,

-I've put him as the anchor at the back of the team.

-Right.

Well, it's time to get serious. OK?

So, let's play the game.

Over to you, Brain.

You will only face questions from the games you've already seen today.

But for game in the final, I will only accept your first answer.

Quarter Minds, beat me if you can.

-Can you Beat The Brain, do you think?

-We can.

-Of course.

-We can, team. Come on.

-Jolly good.

As usual, we start with the player on the left. That's you, Sue.

I need two correct answers from you before we can pass down the line.

-OK?

-Yeah.

-Everybody ready? Let's start the game.

What time is it?

That would be five to three.

Incorrect. Make a word.

Quench.

Yes.

12. 15.

Triple four.

Subtract the score.

SHE MUTTERS

Pass.

Two,

three, one,

three, one.

Three.

Correct. Paul.

Which wheel matches the one on the left?

I will go for...

D.

Correct.

Solve the riddle.

Left.

-Yes.

-Yes.

Steve. What's the missing word?

Art.

-No.

-(Oh, tar, yes.)

How many times past the needle.

Seven and three.

Incorrect.

Four. six.

Double 19.

HE MUTTERS

Four...

five...

four.

No.

What time is it?

20 past five.

No.

Gelatine.

Correct.

Six and two.

Yes. James.

18. six.

Double 17.

Pass.

C.

Correct.

B-O-T.

No.

Left.

Incorrect.

20 past 11.

-Correct. Stop the clock.

-YES!

APPLAUSE

That was close to the wire.

You had seven seconds left, that means you don't go home empty handed.

You've won £175.

THEY LAUGH AND CHEER

-Who'd have thought at in the beginning?

-How about that?

-James, you saved the day.

-I felt like it was the 3,000.

THEY LAUGH

-So, have you enjoyed playing?

-Really. It's been great fun, yeah.

What do you think, Brain?

Well, they now have money to buy a rather lovely bottle of champagne.

Very well done, it was an absolute pleasure to meet me.

THEY LAUGH

And thank you for watching at home. I hope you enjoyed playing along,

-but for now it's goodbye from Quarter Minds.

-Bye.

-Goodbye.

-It's goodbye from The Brain.

-Goodbye.

-And it's goodbye from me.

See you next time.

Don't go just yet - here the answers to the questions I gave you

at the start of the show.

Rearrange the cuttings to form a word.

The answer is...

Utopia.

And what about the second one?

Which of the four wheels on the right matches the one on the left?

The answer is...

A.

Play these and many more testing games next time on Beat The Brain.