Episode 3 The Getaway Car

Welcome to Cape Town, South Africa

and the ultimate relationship road test.

Where there's no backseat drivers, just front seat mayhem.

Belt up, this is The Getaway Car.

Shall we get the stunt driver in now, yeah?

-OTHERS:

-Yeah.

No! No! HE SIGHS

Oh, yeah, hilarious. Great bunch of guys, really.

Go!

SCREAMING

Oh, my God!

Stop! Stop!

Get in there!

Can a loving couple cope with the intense pressure

of being put in the car together over four rounds

of ludicrous driving challenges

and still being on speaking terms by the end?

Well, the answer is frankly anyone's guess,

but if any of today's five couples can withstand the pressure...

-Where am I?

-Go left! Go left!

-Where am I on this roundabout?

-Go left!

..perform driving miracles...

THEY SCREAM

Oh, my God!

..and not fall out with each other...

Barbara, what you doing to us?

..they could be driving this.

The four-wheeled wonder that is The Getaway Car

and earning themselves a £10,000 payday.

ENGINE REVS AND TYRES SCREECH

Now, I said they could win £10,000,

but only if they find their way past this fellow.

Top Gear's The Stig.

Today's finalists will be going helmet-to-helmet

against this racing legend in a thrilling midnight chase.

Out-drive him and the £10,000 is theirs.

Right, foot down, let's get the show on the road.

And here are the five teams.

Today's willing victims, if you will.

Let's meet some of them.

Happily-married couple, Kate and Charlie, from Devon,

are looking to prove that they can live life in the fast lane.

Brothers Mitz and Dee, looking sharp and relaxed.

That's because they don't know what's coming.

And best friends since birth,

Chloe and Bethany, from Bognor Regis,

hoping their friendship will power them to glory.

There they are, today's teams.

Oh, so dapper in their racing garb.

Lovely, lovely people, one and all. What have they done to deserve this?

Right, the cars are ready - and you know what they're like

when they're kept waiting, impatient so-and-sos -

So, let's crack on with round one - Hazard Highway.

Hazard Highway sees our couples take on fearsome obstacles

that will test their relationship to the max,

their ability to support each other, their communication skills

and the length of their fuse.

As only the fastest three teams around it

will qualify directly for round two.

So, first team at the start.

-High five.

-Good luck.

Meet Kate and Charlie, from Devon. MUSIC: Theme from Charlie's Angels

They've been happily married for nine years,

and they're feeling very much in the pink.

Kate and Charlie, welcome to The Getaway Car. How are we today?

We're good. We're good.

Charlie's like, "Well, I'm not sure.

"This could be a terrible mistake."

How did we decide that you are the driver and you're the co-driver?

-Dermot, it's a terrible, terrible error.

-It's not.

The main reason that we decided that I would be the driver

is because I want to be a role model for my kids.

They're both girls and...

Yeah, but you know, bring it on! Bring it on!

How good a driver is she?

Well... I mean, how many times did you take to pass your test, Kate?

I did take six times.

BACKGROUND MUSIC STOPS ABRUPTLY Ooh!

Ooh!

So, the Pinks are first to tackle Hazard Highway.

And they begin at the top floor of the Multi-Scary Car Park.

Feel the fear, feel the fear.

-KLAXON SOUNDS

-Feel the fear!

Let's do it, Let's go!

Wow!

Next, it's Tin Can Alley.

Go for it. That's it, go for it.

Keep going, keep going. That's it.

Oh, God!

Charlie's having the time of his life.

Fantastic. Good stuff, OK.

-Great start from the Pinkies.

-Let's go, let's go.

-Oh, God.

Let's go, let's go, let's go.

Now, are things going to get bumpy on the seesaws?

There we are, that's it. Accelerate up.

OK, come on, Kate, you can do this, you can do this, you can do this.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, fantastic.

Charlie, very unhappy not to be driving

-but sounding very supportive so far.

-Oh...

-Let's go! Let's go!

-Good seesaw work, Kate.

Onwards and quite specifically, upwards.

-Go for it.

-This is the poorly engineered Bridge of Doom.

As tall as a house...two houses...big houses,

linked by a rickety bridge.

MUSIC: O Fortuna By Carmina Burana

That's it, fantastic.

-Just accelerate up there.

-My foot is just totally shaking.

Yeah, you're doing really well.

You are the wind.

You are the wind.

Go to the right now, that's right.

-Pushed down to the...

-Oh, my God!

There's only one way down, via Car-agara Falls.

Whoo-hoo!

Whoa!

-OK...

-Oh, my God!

-..straight through this.

Oh, nice driving, Kate.

Well...sliding.

-That's got to be the worst bit.

-Keep breathing, keep breathing.

No, this is probably the worst bit.

-OK, erm...

-Goggles on, goggles. Goggles on.

So, blindfold on, this is Human Sat Nav.

Kate can't see a thing, Charlie is in charge.

In high-drama situations, I think I'm...

I think, I mean, this might be different,

but I think I deal with it quite well.

Yeah, you see that's a complete fabrication.

What could possibly go wrong?

OK, right. Right 10, right 10.

-LOUD BANG

-Oh, God!

-OK, keep going.

-No, it's all right, it's part of the...

-What do I do now?

-Keep going forward.

-You avoid the obstacles, Kate...

Keep going and then left 10, left 10.

..drive fast...

Keep going, forward left. You're doing really well.

-..and ideally, keep your marriage intact.

-Oh, my God! OK.

-Right, keep going now right.

-What?

Keep going forward. Forward.

Keep going round. You're doing well, just keep going.

Right, right, right 90. Yeah, right 90.

Keep going, keep going. That's it, great.

-Wow!

-No, keep going, first gear.

-Are we nearly there, Charlie!

-Yeah, go forward.

-Please tell me we're nearly there.

-Oh, Kate's not enjoying this.

-Where am I?

-Go left! Go left!

-Where am I on this roundabout?

-Go left! Go left!

Left, left, then forward.

-Right, right, right.

-Oh, my God!

-Go forward.

-Please let me take these off.

OK, take them off! Take them off! Take them off!

Kate and Charlie are out of the Human Sat Nav,

and next it's South Africa's worst wax and polish,

the almost pointless Car Wash that doesn't actually get your car clean.

OK, can't see anything, can't see anything.

Foot to the floor for Car Football.

-Tell me what to do, Charlie.

-Go straight on, straight on.

Kate and Charlie have to get the giant-sized ball

past the giant-sized goalie into the giant-sized net.

-OK.

-Keep going...

All right, here we go, Kate.

-Come on ball...

-She shoots...

-..in you go, baby!

-..and,

-and...

-Yes! Oh, God!

IMAGINARY CROWD CHEERS ..and she scores.

Girl's a natural.

Clock is ticking, give it some welly, Kate.

Go for it. Go for it, girl.

-Come on!

-Yes, and brake! Brake! Brake!

Whoo!

Kate's not like this on the school run, is she?

Yeah, let's do it! Let's do it!

-You're more machine than woman.

-Whoo!

Yeah! Come on, we can do it! Yes!

And Kate and Charlie cross the finish line,

setting in the time to beat, 07:19.

We did it. I broke my fear, and we just did it, I can't believe it.

So well driven. How did it feel?

Erm...good.

We felt the fear, and we did it anyway.

-You embraced the fear.

-Yeah, yeah.

-I so needed to do this.

-Well done, darling.

-I can't quite believe that we did it.

-Well done.

-They'll be proud of you. Good job.

-Thank you very much. Thanks so much.

Cheers, Dermot. Let's hug it out.

Let's meet our next two teams

who are hoping to be top of the leaderboard today.

With young hearts and brand-new driving licences,

it's Team Yellow, best friends Chloe and Bethany.

And Team Blue lovebirds, Joseph and Karen.

-You are boyfriend, girlfriends?

-Hm-hm, yeah.

-How long have you been together?

-Just over a year.

Just over a year, and you decide to do this?!

-Yeah, and then we enter something like this, yeah.

-Oh, wow.

What brings you here? Are we obsessed with driving?

What's the dynamic?

I like driving, but we haven't driven for about six months.

DERMOT LAUGHS

Ooh!

-You could say we're not exactly match fit at the moment.

-Hm.

I'm intrigued as to how this is going to go, I have to be honest.

So are we.

How do we know each other?

Our parents met in hospital when they were pregnant with us.

So, we've known each other our whole lives.

-You're practically sisters.

-We know what each other's thinking.

-Just one look.

-OK. Now?

-You're thinking about food.

-I am.

-I need the toilet.

-Don't wee in here.

I'll try not to.

But if it happens, it happens.

-We're both, like, adrenaline junkies.

-Yeah.

So, there's not going to be one of us that's scared

-at the top of a drop.

-Yeah.

-It's just all fun.

That's what we like to see, brave contestants.

KLAXON SOUNDS

THEY SCREAM

Oh, gosh.

-BOTH:

-Ooh!

-Oh, my God.

-OK.

Now, Bethany is a self-confessed screamer.

Apart from the early screams, pretty calm.

THEY SCREAM

I'm in agony.

THEY SCREAM There it goes again.

Oh, my God, that was awful.

High-octane stuff from the Yellows.

But how about the Blues?

KLAXON SOUNDS

THEY SHRIEK

We're quite adventurous, and we just go for it.

HIGH-TEMPO MUSIC FIZZLES OUT

Really?

OK, we've done it. Nice and calm, Joe, nice and calm.

That is the slowest car dressed as a shark I've ever seen.

Oh, my God!

Joe does know there's a time on this, right?

-Sorry, that was too fast.

-OK.

Joe, that's so slow.

Nice and steady now. My left leg is shaking.

It's OK.

Why is he driving so slowly?

I've stalled it again.

-That's OK.

-# I want a slow hand... #

With the adventurous Blues getting themselves back in gear,

the Yellows are cruising nicely above the Bridge of Doom.

Oohh!

Go to the end one cos it'll be easier to get to.

-Do you think?

-Yeah. Oh, my God!

And cue the scream. THEY SCREAM

Oh, my God!

Next, it's the Human Sat Nav.

The girls have said they know what each other's thinking,

which normally involves food. This should be a piece of cake.

-Sharp left.

-That's as far sharp as I can go.

Just keep going like that. Now straight, straight, straight.

Now we're on the roundabout. Go left, left, left, left, left.

-OK, we're up... Right, reverse a little bit.

-Reverse, or

-straight? Am I going straight?

-Yeah.

We're in the middle bit, it's fine. Keep going right, keep going right.

Keep going right.

ENGINE REVS AND TYRES SCREECH

We're going to still be here tomorrow night.

Or possibly next week.

But how are the Blues getting on? Grrr!

# We have all...

-Well, they're moving, just slowly.

-# ..the time in the world...

The windscreen wiper's going faster than the car.

# ..to unfold all the precious things. #

-This is actually top speed right now.

-I'm sweating.

-Go, go, go!

-Back to the Yellows,

who are hightailing it to the finish line.

Whoaaa!

THEY SCREECH

Flat on the power.

And Chloe and Bethany are home...

..and slightly dry, in a time of 08:27.

-Oh, mate, that was so stressful.

-High five.

I'm sweating like a pig in a barbershop.

I can't explain how hard that is.

-BOTH:

-Yeah!

-All I can say is I won't be needing this anymore.

-Why?

-All I could hear was this...

-Screaming.

-..arrghhh!

-It was there.

-Yeah, that was the one...

-That was so much fun.

..the one when I realised my eardrum was kind of a thing of the past.

With the Yellows all screamed out, let's see how the Blues are fairing.

RELAXING PIANO MUSIC

They're fairing slowly.

Yeah, unbelievably slowly.

It's kind of blowing.

God, this could be a tap in.

-IMAGINARY CROWD CHEERS There you go.

-Whaa-hey!

But they eventually finish the course...

..in the slowest time so far.

-Oh, my God.

-Oh, my God.

Which, when we look at the leaderboard,

is putting Joseph and Karen in grave

danger of being in the bottom two

at the end of Hazard Highway,

and that is not a good place to be.

The slowest two will find themselves in a sudden death race-off

where only one will survive.

Go! It's a head-to-head battle

where the co-driver's knowledge and nerve will be severely tested.

And driving them are these two chilling characters -

The Stig's uncontrollable teenage nephews, Red Stig and Blue Stig.

And hoping to avoid this horrible fate,

it's our sisters from the north,

57-year-old Valerie and 68-year-old Barbara.

-How close are we?

-Very close.

-Do you do everything together?

-Yeah.

What do your better halves think about you guys been out here?

-They've got a week's peace.

-Is that the way they're looking at it?

-You're going to take down the young'uns, yeah?

-Yeah.

It's like the hare and the tortoise, isn't it? They'll be...eh-e-uh.

-And we'll just drive.

-Der-der-der-der-der.

-We'll surprise everybody.

-I'm intrigued...

-I'm scared.

-I am.

-You need to be.

THEY LAUGH

Good luck, Val.

-We can do it.

-Got the indicator on.

That's a worrying sign at the top. HE LAUGHS

-KLAXON SOUNDS

-We're off.

-Do not go right.

MUSIC: Fight For The Right by The Beastie Boys

So, age is no barrier,

but that barrier's a barrier.

That was very fast, wasn't it?

Ooh!

-OK.

-Very slowly up here.

-First.

What are we doing?

-We keep saying... All I get off Barbara is...

-What am I doing here?

"What have you got me into? What have you got me into?"

-Where have you brought me to again?

-That's all I can hear.

Still indicating right.

About to take a trip down Car-agara Falls.

# ..for your right to party. #

They are having the time of their lives.

And they're onto the Human Sat Nav...

Oh, we've got to get our speed up now, Barbara.

..where clear communication and a sense of direction is key.

No pressure, Babs.

Keep going. Bear right, bear right.

-LOUD BANG

-Oh.

I've got a habit of saying right, quite often.

I'm blindfolded, she goes, "Left, left, right."

-Right.

-"Left, left, right." Smash into something.

Right, go on. Turn left, left, left.

-Left, left.

-I can't see the...

-I can't even see.

Yeah, you're going to have to just...

Where are they going?

-Sorry about this.

-Right, what am I doing?

Reverse. No, forward, sorry.

To the right, round, round, round, round, round.

Go on, keep going round, if you can.

Ah, they're stuck. They were doing brilliantly.

Oh, we should have been off here hours ago.

Whilst they dig themselves out of the gravel,

let's meet today's final team.

From Twickenham, in South West London,

hoping to romp to victory and bag the £10,000,

it's brothers Mitz, 36 and Dee, 34.

Do you live together?

We do. So, we live with our mum and dad and we share a room.

-You share a room?

-We share a room.

Yeah, we've got a bunk bed and so...

-Why do you keep telling people this?

-Well, there's nothing wrong with it.

There's nothing wrong with it.

-It's probably quite unusual, isn't it?

-Yeah.

When we argue, we sometimes say,

"Oh, you can go and sleep in the spare room," kind of thing.

Do you argue a lot? You seem so chilled.

I'm very spiritual, and so I've brought a Hindu god with me.

-Yeah.

-It's this one here.

-That's Ganesh.

-Ganesh.

It's the removal of obstacles from your path of success.

-Oh, my God, it's perfect.

-Yeah!

Mitz and Dee's destiny awaits at the top of the Multi-Scary Car Park.

-Jai Ganesh.

-Jai Ganesh.

Please bless us on this trip,

so that we succeed and remove all the obstacles from our path.

Right, Mitz and Dee, give yourself to the universe, succumb.

This is so scary.

-KLAXON SOUNDS

-Oh, my God!

-Arghhh!

I've never screamed like that in my life.

I wouldn't say he's the best driver I know.

-Who's the best driver you know?

-Probably Dad.

-First rail or the second rail?

-Go on the second one.

-Sure?

-Yeah, that's my intuition.

-OK, here we go. Ready?

-All right, the universe is with us. We have...

Oh, shhhoot!

Bumper cars.

This is mad.

Oh, let's do it again!

Whoa, maybe not, maybe not.

-You trust me, don't you?

-No.

-You don't?

He doesn't trust me.

-I can't trust you.

-It doesn't matter, I don't trust you either.

For two people that don't trust each other...

That's it, yeah, right. You're going into that pit now.

-..this is going quite well.

-Left, left, left, left.

Oh, yeah.

OK, left, left, left, left.

Straight, straight, straight, straight, straight, straight.

I can't see a thing.

Right, boys, you're supposed to stop in the box and take the goggles off.

-I can't see a thing.

-Boys. Boys.

-Boys!

-Stop!

-LOUD BANG

Back, back, back. We can't see a thing.

Stop! Stop!

-That was awful, Dee.

-Left, left, left, left, left.

-I can see now.

Oh, yeah, I forgot. Straighten straight.

You can see a thing, though. Water? Can you...

LOUD SMASH

They're now stuck in the carwash.

Keep going, we can only do our best.

-Now for the home straight.

-Speed down it, speed it.

Just speed round this corner as fast as you can, Mitz.

Fast, fast, fast, fast.

Don't worry about anything else. Speed it, speed it, speed it.

Full steam ahead! Ahead, ahead, ahead, ahead, ahead.

Quick, quick, quick. Go, go, go.

I'm hoping we've done it well enough, Dee.

We can do it, we've done it, we've done it.

And Mitz and Dee finish in a time of 08:51,

but will it be enough?

-Oh, man.

-That was brilliant, I want to do it again.

-Oh!

-The poor car.

That's all right cos it took one for the team.

It did take one for the team.

It hit the car wash, which isn't technically an obstacle.

Where was Ganesh, then, remover of obstacles?

This is part of his plan.

It's supposed to be this way. We're going to win, you'll see.

Well, Val and Babs will have something to say about that.

They're finally leaving the Human Sat Nav.

Right, right, right, right.

Right, stop.

Oh, look what I'm in front of.

-Well, I stopped you. We're going to Chipping Norton.

-Oh, my goodness.

Forget Chipping Norton, get a move on.

-# Like a bat out of hell... #

-And your indicator is still on.

-This is it.

-Oh, God, it's heating up.

Everything's heating up, I can't see out the window.

# Like a bat out of hell I'll be gone when the morning comes. #

Val and Babs are across the finish line in a time of 14:00.

-On the nose.

-Oh, we failed.

Oh, Barbara, we've failed.

Well, the others might have trouble going through.

How did you find it?

-It was all right except that...the blind part.

-Yeah.

Because I was as blind as her, I couldn't see anything.

-Well, technically you weren't.

-I could not see the floor.

-How come? What couldn't you see?

-I couldn't see the ground at all.

Come on, girls, early days, all right?

I'm a bit disappointed, I thought I would have done better than that.

-Yeah.

-You don't know what your time is yet.

-Yeah.

-You've got to think positive, yeah.

-Yeah, positive.

So, all five teams have completed Hazard Highway.

It's time for the results.

And top of the leader board, it's Kate and Charlie.

Oh, my God! I can't believe it.

In second place, it's screamy Team Yellow.

THEY SCREAM Ow!

Oh, my God.

Taking the last automatic place into round two

and thanking Ganesh, it's Team Green.

-Are you joking me?

-Yeah!

-I told you...

-Are you kidding me?

..the universe.

Leaving the Blue Team, Joseph and Karen,

and the Reds, Val and Babs, in the race-off

fighting for the place in the next round.

-Sorry.

-No, it's fine.

Are we at the bottom? We were the last, slowest?

-Oh.

-Oh, God.

ENGINE REVS

Oh, the tension is rising and so is the wind as we are in the race-off.

The good news is you are not co-driving with your drivers.

The bad news is, you're driving two laps around the track

with these two - Red Stig and Blue Stig.

Your job is to give me multiple answers to one question.

Whoever gets the most right goes through to the next round.

The fewest right goes home. Understand?

-BOTH:

-Yes.

-All right?

-What's the question?

-I can't tell you that!

I'd like to think about it!

She is good.

All right, helmets on, wish each other look. Good luck.

And they will need it because it's time for the race-off.

And the cars the Stig's nephews choose to knock about in are these -

- 171mph supercharged Jaguar F-type S's.

Remember, only one team can join the others in round two.

Here is your question,

and I'm looking for the full name and number.

Name as many of the following as you can -

monarchs of England and the UK since 1066.

Three...

..two,

one.

Go! And they're off.

Now, they'll have to think back to their school history lessons.

How many monarchs can they remember?

King Henry I, King Henry II

King Henry III, King Henry IV,

King Henry V, King Henry VIII,

-King Henry... Oh, I don't know.

-Well, Karen's off to a good start.

First Charles, second Charles,

third Charles, fourth Charles, fifth Charles, the sixth.

And Babs is too.

Queen Elizabeth one, two, three.

Queen Elizabeth the third? OK.

George I, George II...

Babs feeling the G-force on that corner.

..George III, George IV,

George V, George VI.

One lap gone, that's halfway through.

King George, King...erm.

Edward VII, Edward VI,

Edward V, Edward IV,

Edward III, Edward II...

-King Charles...

-Last bend now.

-Come on!

-William the Conqueror.

Oh, I don't know.

Elizabeth I, Elizabeth II, Victoria.

And it's all over, but who will have named enough monarchs

to go through to the next round?

# I was a king under your control. #

Thank you, that was good.

Time for the results.

OK, Karen.

You got a very respectable...

eight correct.

CHEERING Not bad at all.

Barbara...

you got 18.

Did we not say, age comes wisdom.

If it was something that she knew the answers to,

and then we didn't get through,

-then I might be a bit upset.

-Then it would...

But she's off the hook.

King George, King...erm.

I still think we work quite well together.

We know what our weaknesses.

-We still like good fun and...

-Yeah, we're happy.

So, as Joe and Karen are contemplating

whether they'll even drive or talk to each other again,

still leaves us with four couples in with a chance

of facing The Stig and potentially winning £10,000.

Right now, though,

it's time for a real road and relationship dust-up,

cos it's quite dusty where we're heading, you see.

Off-Road Rage.

Round two features a course designed by Mother Nature.

And when it comes to dust and bumps and trees and snakes,

she really didn't scrimp.

What she can't take credit for, however, are these -

small but mighty buggies.

Our four remaining teams will take to the Off-Road Rage course

in a race against the clock.

Along the way, they'll encounter these, Stig idols.

Good day to you. They knock one over, they incur a time penalty.

Five seconds for a white Stig, 10 for a red.

And should they get stuck in the African undergrowth

and need help from The Getaway pit crew,

it's a hefty 30-second penalty.

The slowest two teams go into the race-off.

So, in this round, we're talking speed,

we're talking communication, we're talking goggles.

First up are Mitz and Dee.

This is the first time me and my brother have been away together.

My mum's petrified at what the outcome would be.

It's going to help us become better as a...

-Better to understand each other.

-Yeah.

-I'm doing my meditation.

Hold on to this.

Boys, boys, boys, I am so looking forward to this.

Remember, don't knock over the Stig heads.

Don't knock over the Stigs.

Three, two, one - go! KLAXON SOUNDS

And they're off.

Steady, slow and steady. Right, right, right, right.

That's it, good boy, good boy.

Water coming up, slow and steady.

Sharp right hand, there's a Stig. Go through the middle, if you can.

Don't worry if you knock one over, that's the way it's meant to be.

Well done.

OK, one.

We can do it, the universe is with us.

Stay straight.

That's it, nice and smooth. Don't worry if you hit one...

Left, left, left, left, left.

Manoeuvre back, if you have to. That's it.

-Keep going, forward, forward, forward.

-Poor Stig.

You can make up the time.

Strictly speaking, the universe is one, but it's still a race.

Mitz and Dee attacking the Cape Of No Hope now.

-Reverse, reverse, reverse.

-No, I can't reverse.

Oh, you can't reverse.

The old slow and steady approach... not working.

I told you to reverse, the red ones are worth more.

Halfway now, put your foot down, boys.

Left, hit it, hit it.

-That's it.

-You're not supposed to hit the Stigs.

This is Cheetah's Corner now and lovely work from Mitz.

Next, scaling the heights of Sillymanjaro.

Hold on tight, Dee. DEE SHRIEKS

I'm the king of the world.

Left, left, left, left.

Left at this turn.

No crashes, other than into the Stigs,

and across the finish line.

-Yes!

-We did it.

Well done. How are we thinking? What are we thinking?

-I think it went very well.

-Yeah?

At one point he shouted out, "I'm the king of the world."

-I heard that.

-It felt right at that point to say that.

-Yeah.

You hit four white, one red.

So, 30-seconds-worth of penalties.

-Oh.

-Your time, 03:06.

-Oh, that's not bad.

-I think that sounds quite good.

Only time will tell. Come on, let's go and watch the next round.

-Thank you.

-Thank you much.

-A pleasure, man.

There's our pace-setter, 03:06.

But will sisters Val and Barbara be able to beat it?

-We're just as good as the others, even though we're a bit older.

-Yeah.

Why should it always be the youngsters that win?

But we're not very good losers at the same time.

I want to hear my grandson say, "Yeah, Nan!" You know.

Well, ladies, this is the moment I've been waiting for.

I'm looking... I mean, this is a vision.

You were born for this. THEY LAUGH

Best of luck. Three, two, one - go!

KLAXON SOUNDS And they're off.

Oh, eh!

I think we're coming up to some Stigs now,

right in the centre.

Catch them on my side. You've caught the bottom on this side.

-Oh, no, no, no.

-It's all right.

Just knock it out...

This is just high-octane, breakneck style.

Just hit them out the way.

Just charge them, it might be easier.

-I'll run them over.

-Yeah, run them over.

Great sage-like wisdom of the ages.

THEY LAUGH AND EXCLAIM

Oh, I like this!

Avoid the red, avoid the red.

Good girl.

Stigs ahead.

They're at the treacherous Cape Of No Hope.

Now, I think you're going to...

Stop, stop.

-Where are you going?

-What happened to "avoid the red Stig"?

-I think you got...

-Come on, ladies.

-Oh, I've done it again.

Get ahead.

Go for it, Val. Put your foot down, I don't care.

Bab's having a great time now. It's on to Cheetah's Corner.

And what goes up, must come down...Sillymanjaro.

Wheee!

And again, watch the Stig on the right.

Now you're worried about the Stigs.

Whaaay!

Cheering themselves home, Val and Babs. Respect.

That was adorable, I loved it.

All I heard was this... Whee-hee! Woo-hoo-hoo!

-I loved it.

-I know. It was great, girls, well done. Bring it in.

Thank you.

So, six whites, one red,

which mean 40 seconds' worth of penalties

and a 03:40 time.

Two teams down and two to go.

Next up, Team Yellow, best friend, Chloe and Bethany.

Let's do this, Chloe.

People call us Dumb and Dumber, and I think... Which one was which?

-I think I was Dumb and you were Dumber.

-Oh, really?

Mate, mate, mate, you need to communicate with me loads.

-Yeah, I will.

-Cos I've got so much to concentrate on.

-Don't worry, Chloe, I'm going to...

-I've got so much to remember.

-Chloe and Bethany, how are we feeling in there?

-Good.

-Good?

I wish you the best of luck, all right? Good luck.

Three, two, one - go! KLAXON SOUNDS

THEY SCREAM They're off!

And I do believe they're screaming.

Coming up here there's four. Go slow through them.

-Go slow, go slow, go slow.

-I'm going to have to hit one.

It's all right. That's fine. Go, go, go.

-It's fine, it's fine.

-I'm just going to go.

Slow, slow, slow.

Ooh, that was straight into that.

How do I change gear?

It's all right.

We can't get it out.

Oh, now we're going to lose loads of time.

Uh-oh. Girls are stuck and need help -

it's a 30-second pit stop penalty right there.

-That's it, that's it.

-Hallelujah! OK, we're back on. We're back on!

-Yay!

-OK, watch out, they are coming up.

-That's fine.

Go to the left.

Poor Stigs didn't even stand a chance.

The girls approach the Cape Of No Hope

and need to make up some time.

-That's it. Go through these.

-Shall I cut away through those?

Yeah. Don't worry about the red.

Yeah, pelt it.

It's stuck under the car.

SHE SCREAMS

Why are we not moving?

Oh, poor girls. It's a disaster.

Try again. There we go.

You ready for the race-off?

Ready for the race-off!

Slow, slow, slow cos it'll get stuck under the car.

Oh, my God.

Whoo!

Nicely done around Cheetah's Corner.

There might be Stig heads this side.

And over Sillymanjaro.

SHE SCREAMS

Left. Slow, slow, slow.

That's it.

-Yay!

-Yay, finally!

Yay!

-Oh, oh!

-That was ridiculous.

-Mate, no.

-I don't even know what to say.

-Neither do we.

-Seven white Stigs.

-Seven?

-Yeah.

-35.

-35. Add the 35 seconds for The Stig penalties.

-30 seconds for the pit stop penalty.

-65. One minute five.

-And slowest time of the day - 4.35.

-5.40.

-Bingo.

-That was good math. So, we are in the race-off then?

-Yeah.

Although if the race-off is arithmetic, then you are laughing.

With the slowest time yet and one team to go,

Team Yellow will definitely be in the race-off.

But who will join them?

Kate and Charlie, fastest on round one, Hazard Highway.

Kate, as last time, as Charlie said, more machine than woman.

-Your words, darling, not mine.

-Yes! Bring it on.

-Best of luck.

All right, here we go. Three, two, one, go!

-KLAXON SOUNDS

-Yay!

Here we go. Well done. Let's go! Yeah! Go, go, go!

Whoa! Ooh-hoo-hoo!

Come on, Kate, you can do this. What do we do here?

Straight through, straight through. Whoo!

All right, jump it.

-HE LAUGHS

-Brilliant!

Charlie is just having a hoot so far.

Let's go around the middle. Go around the middle. Just keep going.

Keep going. That's it, keep going. You're doing fine.

-Oh, no.

-OK, go, go. Watch out for the red button.

Watch out for the red one. Breathe.

Yes!

The Pinks are doing very nicely as they approach the Cape Of No Hope.

-How am I going to do that red one?

-Go to the right. Drive to the right.

Oh, I need to take the white one out.

A disastrous red and white double.

-Come on there, Kate.

-Right down the middle.

Keep going, right down, right down.

Oh, no.

Ohh!

-Accelerate. Speed, speed!

-I'm going to take it high.

Take it high, take it high, Kate.

Off they go over the gigantic Sillymanjaro.

Hold it down, hold it down! Whoo!

OK, around the corner.

Watch out for the left one.

-Don't take it out.

-Yeah!

And over the finish line. Huzzah!

THEY CHEER

Strong is the work of the Pinks.

Down to business. OK. So, your time...

-..after 40 seconds' worth of penalties...

-Oh, no.

Sounds like a lot.

..was 03:09,

meaning you are safe and not in the race-off. Well done.

-HE LAUGHS

-Oh, my God!

So, automatically through

to round three -

the Green Team and the Pink Team.

In the bottom two and facing the

race-off - the Reds and the Yellows.

Co-drivers Bethany and Barbara are about to endure

the roughest ride of their lives.

The Stig's reckless nephews are once again behind the wheel,

this time in these off-road monsters.

It all comes down to this.

One question, one terrifying lap, only one place in round three.

-Not feeling great about being in the race-off, are we?

-No.

Well, especially me. I've got to answer all the questions.

It's not over for the Reds yet.

-You've not seen the end of us yet till...

-Never.

..till the fat man sings, or the fat lady.

Are you calling me fat?

THEY LAUGH

Ooh!

-VALERIE:

-Oh, look at her face!

-Can you hear me loud and clear?

-BOTH:

-Yeah.

-All right, here is your question.

You've got one lap to give as many of the following as you can -

football teams that have played in the English Premier League.

Three, two, one, go!

England, Madrid, France, Spain, Africa...

Not the biggest football fan in the world then.

Manchester City, Birmingham, Chelsea, Tottenham, Arsenal.

Liverpool, Everton, Norwich.

Babs, did you play football?

Arsenault, Chelsea... Er...

Come on, mate!

West Ham, Crystal Palace, Blackpool, Bournemouth, Lincoln...

No, they haven't.

Wishful thinking there, Babs.

SHE MUMBLES

Uhh...

Cardiff, Swansea.

Madrid.

Bethany hoping for some kind of football super league here.

Bolton. Lapton.

Tottenham.

SHE SCREAMS

Come on, mate!

Whoa!

Eey!

Babs never ceasing to enjoy herself.

So, let's see how we did.

I asked you, Bethany, to give as many of the following as you can...

..football teams who have played in the English Premier League.

I got none.

-You didn't get none.

-Oh, I didn't?

-No. You got three.

-Oh, OK.

-That's all right.

-Yeah?

-I'll take those, yeah.

Barbara, you gave us an astonishing 17.

-SHE LAUGHS

-17!

Bethany, you came up against a machine. What can I say?

We are feeling pretty gutted right now, to be honest.

-But quite proud of ourselves as well.

-Really proud of ourselves.

-I think this experience brought us even closer.

-Definitely.

THEY SCREAM

-You have to, like, so much trust in each other doing this.

-Yeah.

We've always trusted each other,

-but this kind of brings it to a new level.

-Yeah.

-I feel I trust you even more.

-Yeah.

-Do you trust me?

-Of course!

-Thank you. Yeah. Aw.

-Aw. Ooh, fly!

# Goodbye, my friend

# I know you're gone You said you're gone

# But I can still feel you here. #

And then there were three.

Next round that could prove very costly

if they have a little disagreement.

Wa-ha-ha. It's called the Drive-Thru.

At the end of these lanes

are two answers to one question.

When the lights go green, our contestants have to drive as fast as

they can for the answer they think is correct in these Mini Cooper S's.

They'll need to be fast, and they'll need to be right

cos at the end of each race, someone will lose a life.

Lose two lives, and you are out.

At the end, we are left with just one team, our finalists,

who are going to get behind the wheel of The Getaway Car

and hopefully win £10,000

and go face to helmeted face with this fellow.

So, three teams, three cars and only one place in the final available.

In lane one, it's the Green Team - brothers Mitz and Dee.

-We'll leave it up to the universe.

-I'm driving, though.

You're not. You think you're driving,

but the universe is driving you and all of us.

-So, if we...

-Does the universe have a driving licence?

Universe needs no license for anything.

OK.

In lane two, happily married but terribly nervous, Kate and Charlie.

You are like a reed...

..that bends but doesn't break in the wind.

No. You are the wind!

And in the lane three, it is the Red Team, sisters Val and Barbara,

who have come through not one but two race-offs to get to this point.

SHE WHISTLES A TUNE

Stop whistling, Barbara, it's getting on my nerves.

Barbara, don't whistle!

BARBARA SIGHS

OK, here we go, gang - the Drive-Thru.

Remember, Mitz and Dee were the fastest in Off-Road Rage,

which I think shocked you as much as anyone else.

I knew it would be the case.

Kate and Charlie have been very consistent.

Val and Babs have been in the race-off twice, still here.

It's all to play for.

Here is a question one, race one.

The male proboscis monkey

is renowned for having a peculiar what -

nose or bottom?

Three, two, one, go!

TYRES SCREECH

I think it's bottom. All the times we've gone to Chester Zoo.

Nose or bottom? Nose or bottom?

-DEE:

-Left, I believe.

I think it's right. Dee, I think it's right.

-BARBARA:

-Which are you going for?

-I think it's his nose.

All right, go for your nose then.

-CHARLIE:

-Go right, right.

-Right, right, right.

Taken it.

Smashed it.

And I'm last.

I think we might have got it wrong, darling.

So, first question was - the male proboscis monkey is

renowned for having a particular what - a nose or a bottom?

Val and Babs, Mitz and Dee, we went nose.

Kate and Charlie went bottom.

Correct answer...

..was nose.

-Yes!

-It means Kate and Charlie have lost a life, OK?

So you can't afford to lose another one.

Everyone, helmets on, back to the start.

So, the Pinks are first to lose a life.

Remember, lose two lives, and you're going home.

But it's still all to play for.

General knowledge brains on. Trivial Pursuit, darling. Come on.

Trivial Pursuit.

How did you know the answer to that question?

Had someone call do that before cos you got a big nose?

That's a very immature comment to say.

I might call you proboscis monkey from now on.

I've just got to drive faster. What's up with me?

-I don't drive slow at home.

-No, you don't drive slow at home.

I don't know what's happened to me, Barbara.

Race two, question two.

Remember, Kate and Charlie can't afford to lose another life.

Here's your question.

In the NATO phonetic alphabet,

the name of which country is assigned to the letter I -

Israel or India?

Three, two, one, drive!

Go, go, go!

Again, I don't know have an idea.

It's India , I think it is.

Start of David. Star of David is ahead of us.

Yeah, that's Israel.

-I think it's India.

-I don't know, take your pick.

If you could just go for India, please.

That one.

No, no, no!

-Did we come through?

-Yeah.

Well done, teams. Race two, question two.

In the NATO phonetic alphabet, the name of which country

is assigned to the letter I - Israel or India?

Mitz and Dee, you went with India.

Kate and Charlie, Val and Babs, went with Israel.

Correct answer was India.

Which means it all comes down to speed.

And the slowest through the wrong answer...

..were Kate and Charlie.

Which means you lose a life. You leave us now. I'm so sorry.

-Close, though.

-Thank you.

-No worries. Thank you.

-We're gutted cos we did what...

-Really gutted.

We did want to be in the final. It's not to be.

This whole thing's a lot more about

the journey than the money for us, you know?

-Yeah.

-It wasn't really about winning. It was about the process.

-Yeah, yeah.

-And the process has been amazing.

-Where am I, where am I on this roundabout?

-Go left, go left, go

-left! Keep on course!

-HE LAUGHS

-Whoo!

-Brilliant! Left, left.

I've learnt that pink is just a colour.

SHE CHUCKLES

The message is still absolutely the same for our children -

that if you get an opportunity,

and it is something that you're not quite sure about...

..you should do it.

Round three, question three, and we've got ourselves a sibling-off.

ALL LAUGH

Still got two lives each. So, here is your question.

True or false?

The Great Fire of London started before the Battle of Hastings.

Three, two, one, go!

That's false.

Battle of Hastings was years ago. 1066.

London was, I think it was something like 1652.

You went to see it with Mum and Dad, don't you remember? On a day trip.

-What am I doing? False?

-It's false.

-DEE:

-False.

Well done.

-Do you reckon they got there before we did?

-I don't know.

Val is a very good driver.

All right, let's see that again.

The Greens are off to a quick start, once again.

However, the Reds aren't far behind.

The Greens just picked them at the post.

And having both chosen the correct answer,

the Reds lose a life.

They only just got through a bit faster than us, then, you know.

All right, teams, round four, question four.

Through the eons of light entertainment,

over tea-time, they'll be talking of Mitz and Dee versus Val and Babs.

Here is your question.

In the modern version of the song The Twelve Days Of Christmas,

how many lords were leaping -

10 or 11?

Three, two, one, go!

THEY HUM AND SING

We sing this at Christmas, don't we?

Is it 11? Ten lords a leaping... Or is it 11?

I imagine the 11 lords leaping, cos when they leap, they leap forward.

Ten. Go for ten. I don't know.

Yes! We got through. We'll see if we get the answer right.

So close.

I think it's OK.

The Greens off to a great start, but the Reds caught them up,

virtually neck and neck as they smashed to the walls,

but chose a different answers.

There were, in fact, ten lords a leaping

meaning Val and Babs got the answer correct...

Oh, my God, can you imagine? We're that close to actually winning.

..where as Mitz and Dee got it wrong, meaning they lose a life.

So, this is what it comes down to.

Two teams, one question.

And only one ticket to the final for the chance to win £10,000.

It's all or nothing.

Calm. Zen.

In and out.

Breathe.

The universe, please bless all of us, that your intention happens,

and we are able to deliver it as per your wish.

Just concentrate now. You've got to do with the drive of your life now.

Alright, teams, it all comes down to this. Good luck, guys.

Here is your question.

The Suez Canal connects the Mediterranean to which other sea -

the Red Sea or the Black Sea?

Three, two, one, go!

Which one do you think it is? Any ideas?

Oh, the Suez Canal, the Red S... Ooh, going fast. The Red Sea.

The Red Sea is around Egypt, and that's near the Med...

Red, red, red! Go, go, go!

We might have been fast, we might not have been fast enough.

We might be wrong, we might be right.

Didn't you stick your foot down there!

Yeah, I had my foot down. I had my foot right down.

The final question was, the Suez Canal connects

the Mediterranean to which other sea - the Red Sea on the Black Sea?

I thought you were...

You both went with Red.

You are both correct, so it all comes down to speed.

And Mitz and Dee, you were our fastest,

-so you are tonight's finalist. Congratulations.

-Oh, come on.

-Give me a hug.

-Thank you very much.

-Well done, mate. Well done.

-Thank you.

The Greens managed to find an extra turn of pace as they seized

victory and earned their place in tonight's final,

meaning it's the end of the road for Val and Babs.

We've been on the knife edge all the way through this competition.

Keep going round!

Oh, we should have been off here hours ago.

I think we were a bit of the underdogs,

but we proved them wrong, didn't we?

We kept crawling our way back.

-Two rides with The Stig.

-Oh, I like this part.

Wee!

As you get older, you tend to try and do more.

It's like being young again.

-You've got to do it all while you can.

-Yeah.

-Beat him. Yes!

-We got through.

-So, I think we've just shown everybody...

-Yeah.

You're a long time dead.

Yay!

# Forever young. #

So, four couples came, saw, but didn't quite conquer.

And now one couple - Mitz and Dee - are left,

set fare to take on the biggest test yet in the company

of a man about whom we are all in the dark, as is he, I imagine.

I don't think it's sunk in yet. I feel, like, in a state of euphoria.

But I can't show it always.

It's like everything inside of me is jumping up and down,

fireworks going off and everything.

THEY SHOUT

Over the period of this competition,

I think we have been the slight underdogs.

I think people probably saw us as a bit of a joke.

Don't worry, the universe is with us. We have... Whoa, shoot!

We've had some mishaps. We haven't been the best drivers on the course.

Stop, stop!

-We learned from our mistakes and things.

-That was awful, Dee.

You know, like a bird in nest,

sometimes you have to fall before you can learn how to fly.

We can do this, like. Hit it!

It's taught me to appreciate my brother much more.

We love each other. Dee tells me he loves me.

-I don't really say it back much.

-You never say it back so, yeah.

Red, red, red. Go, go, go.

I'm so proud of him.

Mitz has got some strengths, and I've got some strengths,

but we've both of our weaknesses.

I think when you put us together, we kind of make a good cake.

Something that, you know,

millions of people dream to do is to come up against The Stig.

If you could see my toes, they're actually, like, curling

because I'm so afraid!

The universe is saying everything's happened as it was meant to.

And that there's a lot more to come.

And I feel like the universe is siding with us.

Yes.

Go, universe!

So, this is the final round - the Getaway Chase.

Mitz and Dee's job is to drive around this track

twice as fast as they can in this...

That, my friends, is The Getaway Car.

Driving it is a sublime experience

BUT an extremely fast one,

so I'd advise a mix of caution and reckless abandon.

On one level, the challenge couldn't be more simple.

Each time Mitz and Dee pass under a money gate,

they bank that amount of cash.

However, just seconds after their takeoff,

The Stig gets a green light and start hunting down.

Once he catches up with them, it's game over.

But if they get to the finish line first,

they bank the £10,000 jackpot.

That is easier said than driven, though,

because The Stig is not short of choice when it comes to cars.

Tonight, he's has chosen to drive this -

the McLaren 650S Spider.

With a top speed of 204mph, and nought to 60 in three seconds,

it's significantly quicker than The Getaway Car.

So, to make this a fair contest, The Getaway Car pit crew have

worked out that Mitz and Dee can win the £10,000

with a 10 second head start

if they drive The Getaway Car perfectly.

So, one set of bunk bed brothers versus The Stig.

Let the Getaway Chase commence.

Brothers Mitz and Dee await their fate.

Be confident and go for it, yeah? You can do it.

Have they got what it takes to get away from The Stig?

£10,000 on the line.

And The Stig has got his game face on.

ENGINE REVS, TYRES SQUEAL

Mitz gets off to a great start,

but he has to put some space between himself and The Stig.

Very good, very good.

Ten seconds later and The Stig is off.

The Stig's coming.

-Whoo, well done, Mitz. Just got £1,000.

-Tell me where he is.

-He's still coming, don't worry.

-How far?

-He's far away, he's far away.

He's not behind us.

The brothers bank £2,000, although The Stig is approaching at speed.

How long can they hold off?

Put your foot down and belt it.

On the straight now, but The Stig is hunting them down.

One lap complete, that's £3,000.

Faster, faster, he's behind us.

-But Mitz has not taken the corner too well.

-Keep going.

-You're doing well. He's behind us.

-Stig spies an opening.

Put your foot down. Belt it. He's behind this. Belt it, belt it!

It's close, will they make it to £6,000?

Oh, he's caught them, and it is all over.

But fantastic driving there from the boys in green.

Well done. You should be really proud. That's fantastic.

Mitz was just going too fast round the bend,

giving The Stig his opportunity, and you know him - he only needs one.

Yes! Mitz and Dee, come in! Well done.

-Good work. Good work, Dee.

-Thanks.

-How was that?

-Amazing.

-Enjoy it?

-Yeah.

-Fantastic.

It's like when you're little, you play cops and robbers.

This day was the reality that we were actually in it.

-HE LAUGHS

-Yeah, it was fantastic.

Do you have any idea how much money you've made?

We saw him catch up to us when we were near the 3,000.

And then he took over. It was nice to see him but...

-You know, cos I've never seen him so close.

-Well, you're taking home...

Yes!

-OTHERS CHEER

-Yes!

-That's even more than we thought.

-That is amazing!

-Can't believe it.

We have had the result that we...I'm just exceptionally happy with.

You're Getaway champions this week - Mitz and Dee!

CHEERING

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

And that is it.

I'd love to take Blue and Red Stig for a burger,

chip and fizzy drinks, but we are back next week with uncle,

The Stig, and more brave couples ready to put their love

and their driving skill on the line. We'll see you, then.